The Things We Wish For
by DB Sommer
Summary: Through a twist of fate Akane gets a wish. And just wait until you see what she wishes for, and what she actually gets.
1. Default Chapter

The Things We Wish For...  
  
Prologue  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html   
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ancient parchment crackled and filled the air with a musty odor as the scroll was unrolled for the first time in over two centuries. Over the decades since its creation, it had been subjected to every physical punishment imaginable: Rain, fire, cold, and even five-year old children armed with crayons. Being entombed in a damp cave for well over a decade had worn away the edges. Only a careful grip, along with a special preservative oil, kept the scroll from disintegrating as it was forced from the rolled up state it had been in since the day of its completion.  
  
A pair of eyes half the scroll's age widened. An astonished smile broadened across Happosai's features as he read the ancient characters contained on the scroll. "Why, this isn't a recipe for an aphrodisiac at all. It's a wish scroll."   
  
Tears filled the ancient master's eyes as the full impact of what he held in his withered hands struck him. Back when he had first come across the scroll during a tour of the Middle East some fifty years ago, he had been certain he had overheard that sheik say the parchment held a recipe for some sort of potion to increase one's amorous prowess. On the spot, Happosai decided it was his responsibility to take such a powerful item away from one so lascivious, lest the fat man use it on himself and unleash his ill-gotten lust on the beautiful and vast harem he owned. A bevy of the attractive women imaginable made up the composition of the harem, representing a veritable mountain of breasts. And the panties! Certainly the sheik had spared no expense in outfitting the women in his palace of pleasure. Even Happosai had been hard pressed to liberate them all of the silken wonders, but he had. That success was one of the proudest accomplishments in his long life.  
  
Several drops of drool fell from Happosai's mouth and splattered on the scroll. The sounds of the liquid hitting the parchment shook him out of his reverie. This was a wish he most certainly deserved. All that was left was what to wish for. So much potential. So many things. He doubted he could wish for more wishes; that just wasn't the way these things worked. That meant he had to make this single shot at eternal happiness count. What was the one thing he wished for more than anything else? The one thing that would be eternally out of his reach no matter how hard he tried?  
  
The answer struck him all at once, like a woman's slap when he tried to show her his appreciation by embracing her chest. He stared down at the parchment and said, "I wish everyone else in the world were nubile young girls with large breasts, that they had an unlimited supply of panties, and that they'll let a venerable old man like me grope them so that he can enjoy his twilight years in peace and comfort."  
  
Nothing happened.   
  
Happosai read the scroll more closely. "Oh, I have to summon the genie and tell him my wish so he can make it on my behalf. Now, let me see. How does this go?" It took the old man a moment to sift through his memory and recall how to read the ancient symbols of power. Once satisfied he knew how to pronounce them correctly, he invoked the spell.  
  
"Klatuu. Barada. Necktie."  
  
A humming filled the air as the symbols themselves gave off an eerie green mist, each symbol disappearing as the emerald ether filled the air. Slowly the cloud rose until it hung in a solid mass above the parchment.  
  
"Ha cha!" Happosai exclaimed. This was it. For living the life he had, he was finally being rewarded the way he deserved. He could barely wait to go hopping about, snuggling ample bosoms and drawing the unlimited power that could conceivably keep him alive forever, or at least let him die the happiest man on the planet. He could almost feel the breasts in his grasp, the soft, pliable flesh pillowing under his cheeks as he rubbed his face up and down. In fact, he could see a pair approaching now. They were bound in a white gi. The front was slightly open at the neck, 'V'ing downward and showing the white line of an athletic bra. Sweat lined the flesh beneath it, and lungs that still drank deeply of the air caused the breasts to move forward ever so slightly, giving them a slight jiggling motion independent of the one created by walking.  
  
"Sweeto!" Happosai declared and leaped for the first in what would be a long line of women to fondle.  
  
"Get away from me, you pervert!" Akane yelled as her fist met Happosai's jaw, right before he could land in the valley --or at least relatively large ditch-- that her cleavage created.  
  
"That's not what was supposed to happen!" Happosai declared as he flew off into the distance from the force of the blow.  
  
Akane tightened up her gi so she didn't show quite so much skin. She hadn't realized the little pervert was home, or she would have been more careful.  
  
Feeling dirtier than ever, even if Happosai had failed to reach her, Akane headed for the bathroom. Then she spotted the green pillar of mist that hovered above the scroll that had been left on the ground. "Now what did the little creep do? Set something on fire?"  
  
Irate, she approached the parchment, intent on putting it out, when the mists shifted. The upper half of the column coalesced, solidifying until it formed the upper torso of a powerful looking man-like thing. It wasn't quite human, at least none that Akane had ever seen. Its emerald chest was inhumanly broad, even more so than Lime's impressive physique. It was hairless, and had yellow slanted eyes that lacked pupils. Even its ears were alien, being incredibly long and with tips that tapered off into sharp points. What should have been the lower torso remained a green mist that seemed intent on hovering in place.  
  
"If you're looking for Happosai, he already left," Akane told the being, pointing in the direction the little pervert had flown and hoping the weirdo in front of her wasn't going to cause any problems.  
  
The yellow slits that served as the genie's eyes turned to Akane. In a voice that was surprisingly melodious given its powerful form, it asked, "What is your wish?"  
  
"I beg your pardon?"  
  
"I have been summoned. You have one wish. What is it?"  
  
"I didn't summon you," Akane explained.  
  
Unmoved, the genie repeated, "I have been summoned. You are the only one present. The wish will be yours. What is it you wish for?"  
  
Akane looked around, convinced it was some sort of trick. "What's going on here? Who are you?"  
  
"Do you wish to know my name?"  
  
"Ye..." Akane stopped herself. Suddenly she reconsidered her original line of thinking. Perhaps this wasn't some prank. After all, why would the creature try to make finding out its name a wish instead of just telling her? It was like he was trying to make her squander it, instead of having her make some public statement about her desires and then have someone like Happosai or Shampoo pop up and laugh at her for believing she could make a wish.   
  
"Is that your wish?"  
  
"No," Akane said quickly.   
  
Small wisps of vapor began to peel away from the genie's form and hung in the air. "My time on this plane of existence is short. If you do not make your wish within the next five minutes, it will be lost to you forever, as you measure time. Make your wish."  
  
Akane began to panic. It was real. She knew it. This being could grant her any wish, but she had to make it quickly. Immediately her mind was flooded with dozens of possibilities, all vying for control. So many ideas and so little time to consider them. She could wish to be a better cook or better martial artist. She could wish to have better grades or to make it to a good school or take care of any future money problems she or her family could have. What about more personal things? Good health? To be more attractive? To lead a less stressful life? Have a successful career? Wish for everyone to be cured of their Jusenkyou curses? Never having her or Ranma's life placed in danger again, like at Mount Phoenix?  
  
Akane pulled at her hair in frustration. This was too important for her to screw up. If she made the wrong wish, she'd regret it for the rest of her life, and there were too many things to wish for. Never before had she been aware of the importance of a second as they raced by, one after another inexorably. A minute full of indecision was forever lost.  
  
"I can't decide," she said helplessly. The opportunity would be squandered, and there was nothing she could do about it. And then a solution to her problem came to her, speeding past the mass of choices before her. But she had to move quickly. She dashed through the living room and into the kitchen. Luck was with her as she spotted Kasumi dicing vegetables in anticipation of dinner.  
  
"Kasumi, I need help!" Akane said in a gasp.  
  
Kasumi placed the knife down on the cutting board. "What is it?"  
  
"If you could wish for anything in the world, and I do mean anything, what would you wish for?"  
  
"Oh, well that's an odd question. Let me think about it." She placed her hand to her chin in thought.  
  
"There's no time!" Akane blurted out. "I can't decide. Give me an idea of what I can do."  
  
Not quite understanding, but sensing the urgency in Akane's request, Kasumi quickly pondered the dilemma. Almost unbidden, one desire rose above all the others.   
  
Head tilted to the heavens, Kasumi said in almost reverent tones, "If I had one wish, I would wish that mother hadn't been taken from us in that accident."  
  
"That's it!" Akane shouted, kicking herself for not having thought of it sooner. Of all the things she could wish for that lay beyond her grasp, that was the one that she wanted more than anything in the world.   
  
The kitchen was behind her in an instant, as she raced quickly to the living room where the genie remained floating in the exact spot she had left him. There was twice as much mist in the room, and his form was becoming less discernible. Only those yellow slits that served as his eyes remained unchanged.   
  
"Time grows short," the genie warned.  
  
"I have my wish!" Akane gasped. It took her a moment to figure out how to phrase the question so that it was simple enough to not be misinterpreted. Satisfied with the phrasing and unwilling to waste another second lest she lose this chance, Akane said, "I wish my mother had never been in a car accident."   
  
As the last words left her mouth, Akane remembered a story she once read in English class to show her comprehension skills. She remembered it all too well, knowing that with her luck the same thing probably would have happened to her had she been in that situation. Now she found herself in hauntingly familiar surroundings, and fearful events would occur just as they had in the tale of the Monkey's Paw.  
  
"So that she can be with us today," Akane quickly added, hoping the being didn't refuse the last second addition to the request. She didn't want her mother to not die in a car wreck, only to have her life end because of some lingering disease or equally premature death three months after the crash had been avoided. If the genie protested the addition, Akane could claim she had merely paused for breath. Less than a second had passed between "accident" and "so"; he would almost certainly have to accept that as an explanation.  
  
The genie remained silent only for a second before bringing its hands together with a deafening clap and declaring, "DONE!"  
  
Kasumi entered the room just in time to see the figure completely lose cohesion and turn into an emerald mist. The cloud rose to the ceiling and billowed across it before merging completely with the air, as though it had never been there at all.   
  
"I'm glad Mr. Mist didn't leave a stain on the ceiling," Kasumi said as she looked at the plaster with a careful eye.  
  
Akane looked all around. She didn't feel any different. Why didn't she remember her mother not dying in a wreck? Had she just magically appeared in their father's bedroom and everything else remained the same? Perhaps she had appeared somewhere else, but Akane had specifically requested that her mother "be with us (meaning her family) today." Even if the woman popped up next to Nabiki, wherever she was, they should still have proof of their mother's continued survival within a couple of hours. At least that was what Akane hoped.  
  
Turning to her sister, Akane was about to quiz Kasumi on her memory of their mother, to see if their memories corroborated, when the screeching sound of a car's tires came from the street just in front of the house. Both of the Tendou girls turned to the noise, eyes widening.   
  
Hot on the heels of the tire screech, a feminine voice shouted out, "Watch it, you jerk! You nearly ran me down! Are you blind, or is Alzeimers affecting you so badly you forgot your glasses? Hey! You wave that finger at me again, and I'll break it off and shove it so far up your butt you won't be able to crap right for the rest of your life!" There was the sound of a car moving off at an accelerated speed, and then the voice said, "Yeah, that's right! You take that piece of !@#$ car outta here before the rust that's holding it together gives out and it falls apart! Loser!"  
  
Both of the girls looked at each other, their eyes twice as wide as before. Neither dared to speak, maintaining an aura of silence even as they heard a key turn in the lock to the front door. There was the sound of shoes being removed, and then the thump of someone moving through the house. As the sound drew near, a high-pitched feminine voice declared, "I'm home! What's for din-"  
  
The speaker stopped abruptly as she entered the living room and spotted Akane and Kasumi standing in the middle of it.  
  
The sisters looked closely at the stranger and drew in deep breaths. The newcomer's black hair was a familiar short cut, nearly identical to Akane's. Deep brown eyes were guarded closely by short eyelashes. She wore a simple white blouse and pleated skirt. Her body was slender, though one look at her arms and legs showed that she possessed a sort of wiry strength. Her chest was somewhat demure, though at the same time there could be no doubts concerning her femininity. She was on the attractive side, Kasumi believing she resembled Akane in appearance, though she could see some of Nabiki in the face as well. Akane's observations noted the same thing. The close similarity was made all the more uncanny by one simple fact:  
  
The girl was seventeen years old.  
  
Kachiko Tendou looked strangely around the room, then leveled an accusatory finger at the gaping girls. "All right! You two got about three seconds to explain what you did to my house, or else there's going to be some ass kicking going on, and from the looks of things, you two got more than enough butt to last me a while!"   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Yes, the words are a parody from 'The Day the Earth Stood Still' just like from Army of Darkness. How can you go wrong referring to those two classics of the film industry? ^_^  
  
Honestly, I came up with this idea long before I saw the Battle Athletes TV series. As soon as it hit those last few episodes, I said to myself, "Well, looks like I'm not the only one that thought such an idea has a great deal of mischievous potential." Things will not take quite the same course obviously, but there might be a handful of similarities as well. Hopefully I'll be right, though only future chapters will be able to see if I can execute things in an enjoyable manner.  
  
Thanks for reading.  
  
D.B. Sommer 


	2. The Things We Wish For Chapter 1

The Things We Wish For…  
Chapter 1  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma ½ characters. They   
belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The staccato tapping of Kachiko Tendou's fingertips playing across the wood of the   
dining room table filled the air. She sat lackadaisically, slouching slightly, projecting an   
air of lassitude that was only contradicted by the half-lidded, and highly suspicious, stare   
that was directed towards the two girls seated on the opposite side of the table.  
  
Then all four fingers struck the table at once and remained there, signaling an end to the   
waiting. A soft whoosh of air was exhaled, and Kachiko's posture straightened slightly.   
"So let me get this straight. You somehow got this wish granting ability?" She pointed to   
Akane. "You wished your mother hadn't been in a car accident which killed her. A noble   
sentiment, I suppose. However, the result of this wish was that I get plucked out of time   
and thrown over twenty years into the future, where I get to meet the two of you, who it   
just so happens, are my children, one of whom is older than I am now."  
  
Akane shifted uncomfortably. "Well, it's a bit simplified, but yes, that's pretty much what   
happened."   
  
Kasumi nodded her head in agreement.  
  
Kachiko leaned over the table and close to the girls. "Tell me something, don't you think   
I would be a bit insulted at being told such a stupid lie? I mean, come on, you've not only   
got magic, but time travel paradoxes thrown in there as well. What sort of sucker is going   
to believe that?"  
  
"But it's true!" Kasumi insisted.  
  
"Ha!" Kachiko slammed her hand down on the table, not hard enough to crack it, but with   
enough force to make it shake. "Oh please, changing some of the furniture around in my   
house is not going to make me fall for this pathetic lie. Especially since all of the new   
stuff you used is incredibly tacky. Don't you people believe in bright colors? You're as   
drab as my parents."  
  
"We can prove this is the future, and you're our mother," Akane said.  
  
"Sure you can. Why, this place is teeming with signs that it's the future," Kachiko said   
dramatically, rising to her feet and entering the kitchen. She gazed in awe at her   
surroundings. "Look at all this futuristic equipment. Ohh, a microwave. And what's that?   
Why it's a stove. Obviously the design must be good, since it looks exactly like the same   
one that's been here since before World War II. And is that… could it be… oh my god!   
It's an object that produces cold so that food will last longer. It must be what sci-fi writers   
call a refrigerator! I am in the future! Oh my!" Her eyes rolled into the back of her head,   
and she gave a soft cry before sagging to the floor.  
  
"I don't remember Mother being quite this sarcastic," Kasumi quietly confided to Akane.  
  
Kachiko rose back to her feet and returned to the table, staring at the two girls again.   
"Tell me something, and you can be honest with me, this is all one of Wacky Wakaba's   
little practical jokes, isn't it?"  
  
The girls looked at one another. Akane asked, "Wacky Wakaba?"  
  
"Oh sure, she's one of my close friends, as if you didn't know," Kachiko said slyly.   
"She's always pulling practical jokes like this. Did she tell you about the time she tried   
slipping a bomb in my locker, only I saw her plant it, so I switched the lockers? Boy, you   
should have seen the look of surprise on her face when she went to get her books and that   
baby went off. She was out of the hospital in a week. She's a tough little thing. And then   
there was the time we were at the celebration for the baseball team coming in second in   
the national championship, and she tried to slip me a powerful aphrodisiac. Only our   
drinks got mixed up and she ended up drinking it instead. Boy, was she surprised the next   
morning. And sore. She couldn't walk straight for a week. Oh, oh, and best of all, up until   
now anyway, there was this time that she sent love letters to this locked up stalker serial   
killer and pretended they were from me, so he would get fixated on me. And then she   
helped him escape, only he turned on her, so it turned out I had to save her. That girl   
always knows how to keep me on my toes." Kachiko nearly doubled over in laughter at   
the memories.  
  
Akane and Kasumi looked at their mother, aghast. Akane blurted out, "What are you   
talking about? Those aren't practical jokes. Those were murder attempts!"  
  
Kachiko waved her hand dismissively at them. "Sakura says the same thing, and like I   
keep telling her, don't be silly. They're jokes. Wakaba just has a weird sense of humor.   
She's a buddy. She's done lots of favors for me. Why, half the guys I dated in high school   
were dating her right beforehand. Sometimes only the day before I started going out with   
them. She mentions it constantly, and don't think for one second I don't consider myself   
in her debt because of it."  
  
"I… see," Akane admitted.   
  
"So are you two ready to fess up about Wakaba being the mastermind behind this?"  
  
"Not at all. We've never even met someone named Wakaba. You really are in the future,"   
Kasumi insisted.  
  
Kachiko rolled her eyes and rose to her feet. "All right, let's see what I can find to prove   
this isn't the future." She looked around until her eyes settled on the television.   
Triumphantly she walked over to it and examined the buttons along the strip on the   
bottom. "Now we'll see what the television stations of the future are broadcasting."  
  
With the flick of a switch the screen came on and a voice loudly proclaimed, "Down here   
at Miharu's Used Cars have great deals every day! Low prices mean low interest rates!   
Come on down right now and we'll even throw in an extra tire for nothing!"  
  
Kachiko looked at the screen in horror. "You mean they still have used car salesmen in   
the future?! Have you learned nothing? Next thing you'll tell me is you didn't kill all the   
lawyers either." She smirked at the girls and changed the channel.  
  
"…day we are proud to present for your viewing pleasure, Akira Kurosawa's Seven   
Magnificent Samurai."  
  
"Of course. Nothing but cutting edge films as well," Kachiko chuckled, and changed it   
again.  
  
"…and high standing member of the Diet, resigned today over accusations of bribery."  
  
*Click*  
  
"…taxes were raised yet again."  
  
*Click*  
  
"… news today of more unrest in the Mid-East."  
  
"Oh yes, it's all so very different now in the future," Kachiko said blandly, leaving the   
television on.  
  
"But we can prove it to you," Kasumi said. "We have your shrine in the living room."  
  
Kachiko's eyebrows rose slightly. "A shrine? To me? Now this I have to see." She exited   
the room, only to return a minute later. She held up a photo of an attractive woman   
somewhere in her late twenties or early thirties, her brown hair done up in a bun. It had   
been taken outdoors. She stood next to a tree, dressed in a light gray kimono with her   
hands crossed in front of her. The single shaft of sunlight seemed to be focused solely   
upon her, giving her an unearthly aura. The corners of her mouth were turned slightly   
upward, and her eyes spoke of warmth and caring.  
  
Holding the picture before the girls, Kachiko pointed to it. "This is supposed to be me?"   
  
Both Akane and Kasumi nodded solemnly at the picture that had rested in its place of   
reverence for over a decade. Kasumi said, "It was one of your favorites."  
  
Kachiko looked at it again. "BWAHAHAHAHA! You're so lame! Like this could ever be   
me."  
  
"But it is you!" Kasumi insisted.  
  
Barely able to reign in her laughter, Kachiko got out, "Yeah, right. As if I'd ever pose like   
this for a photo. Whoever you got to dress up like that didn't know me at all. Wakaba   
should have known better that to try and pass this ringer off as me."  
  
"What do you mean?" Akane asked.  
  
"I hate kimonos," Kachiko explained. "They're tight and confining. I never wear them   
voluntarily, and would never let myself be photographed in one. And then there's this hair   
in the picture. Aside from the fact it looks completely lame, it just so happens that I hate   
permed hair."  
  
"But you always wore it that way," Kasumi said.   
  
Kachiko fingered her locks. "Nope, this is the way I like it. I'd rather be bald than have a   
perm. This easier to manage and makes me look cute." She considered Kasumi for a   
moment. "You know, you'd probably look better with shorter hair, like me and Akane, or   
whatever her real name is. Not that you look bad, just that you'd go from being real cute   
to real hot. You got kind of a round face, like me, so it would suit you better. Trust me on   
this." Kachiko returned her attention to the photo. "But all of that is just circumstantial   
evidence. What's really the most damning detail that shows this is a fake is that smile."  
  
"What's wrong with Mom's, I mean your, smile?" Akane asked.  
  
Kachiko rolled her eyes. "It's sooo not me. I mean, this woman looks like it's taking an   
effort to even get her lips pointed upward. Now when I smile, it's something the whole   
world can see. Watch." She held the photo side-by-side with her head, then gave a huge   
toothy grin that nearly took up half her face.  
  
Kasumi said, "You look better with a soft smile."  
  
"You look like a demented hyena," Akane agreed.  
  
Kachiko scowled at the two girls, then held the photo in front of her. "I'm insulted at the   
insinuation that I could ever look like this. You know what the woman in this picture   
cries out so hard that it makes my eyes tear? Frumpiness. She's an old frump that   
probably hasn't had a fun day in her whole life. I can easily believe she's some housewife   
with three kids. She looks tired, boring, and is right on the verge of lapsing into a coma."  
  
Kasumi was aghast. "How dare you say such things about my mother, er, Mother." The   
shock drained out of her as she realized the quandary that was present. She looked   
helplessly at Akane, who just shrugged her shoulders in response.   
  
Tossing the photo on the table so it landed in front of them, Kachiko said, "You know   
something? If I was to turn into someone as dull as this, I would prefer being dead. Better   
that than some living hell as a mindless automaton chained to a boring husband and   
obnoxious kids for the rest of her dreary existence."  
  
"That was not the way things were! You were happy!" Kasumi cried out.  
  
Akane was shocked at seeing her sister's emotional outburst. Certainly, Akane was also   
disturbed at their mother's commentary on what she theorized life had been like, even if   
this version of Kachiko Tendou hadn't lived through those years, but to see the usually   
placid Kasumi on the verge of anger was almost as disturbing as the idea that the girl   
before them was in reality their mother.   
  
Kachiko whistled. "You're a good actress. I can almost believe you really think I'm your   
mother. I—" Her head darted in the direction of the television.   
  
"What—" was all Akane got out before Kachiko made a hushing motion with her hand.  
  
"I heard something." The time lost girl went over to the television and turned it up.   
  
The news reporter continued. "Many gathered in Moscow's Red Square to celebrate the   
anniversary of the fall of the Soviet Union. Crowds turned out in the hundreds of   
thousands—"  
  
Visibly disturbed, Kachiko changed the channel.   
  
"—well, Mr. Morisoto, this so-called design flaw with the Shinohara OS is as much a   
media sensation as the so-called Y2K bug that was supposed to cause the end of the   
world as we knew it. But it looks to me like we made it well past the year two thousand   
without the collapse of civilization. What you have yet to accept are that labors are the   
way of the future, and this interface system is the first step towards that futur—"  
  
She changed the channel again.  
  
"—since the unexpected cancellation of the popular series back in two thousand and one.   
People have been writing in and demanding that it return—"  
  
Kachiko turned the television off. She shot the two girls an angry glare. "Exactly how did   
you manage to override the signal and show those to me?"  
  
Shaking her head, Akane said, "We didn't. Those are really the television programs that   
are on right now. You're in the future."  
  
For a moment, Akane was worried the girl might hit her, then Kachiko's eyes alighted on   
something that grabbed her complete attention. "Ah ha! An oversight on your part." She   
walked over to a side table and picked up a folded over newspaper. "Let's check out the   
date on this little thing." She unfolded the paper and came to the front page. Her eyes   
scanned over it. A second later, the paper made a crinkling sound as it was wadded into a   
very small ball and hurled into the garbage can with considerable force. "It's easy to make   
fake newspapers. I've seen them before. It's be a lot easier to make than the television   
trick."  
  
"Mother," Kasumi said softly.  
  
"Enough."  
  
The way it was stated, in such a firm yet soft manner, reminded Kasumi of the way the   
woman who had raised her would have issued the command. Instinctively, the rest of   
what she had been planning to say died on her tongue.   
  
Kachiko walked over to a nearby window and stared out. She began looking at the sights   
that were afforded by the view. Aloud, she calmly said, "Looks like you got someone to   
fix up the fence and build a koi pond out back. That's nice. I always liked the idea of a   
pond; less grass for me to cut. I have to hand it to you, this is one elaborate hoax. The   
Matsui residence looks the same as always. So do the Tanakas. And as for the   
Morimotos…"   
  
Akane and Kasumi watched as the girl's lips pursed slightly and one of the muscles on   
the side of her face began twitching. "Okay. Completely changing a house. That can be   
done, too."  
  
"Now you're being unrealistic," Akane said.   
  
"So says the girl that claims she got a wish from a genie and brought her dead mother   
back from the past." Kachiko snorted. "This is ridiculous. I'm out of here."  
  
"Where are you going?" Kasumi's voice was tinged with panic.  
  
"Out where I can find someone to set me straight." There wasn't the faintest hint of doubt   
in Kachiko's voice. If anything, it sounded tired. She turned sharply on her heel and   
headed to the front door.  
  
"Do you suppose you could untie us first?" Akane asked.  
  
Pausing, Kachiko looked to where she had tied the girls together, back-to-back. Upon   
entering the house, and believing the intruders to be thieves, she had managed to grab   
some rope that had been conveniently lying around and spun it around Akane, whom   
Kachiko had sensed was the more physically capable of the pair, and immobilized her. It   
was a simple matter to quickly do the same to the completely untrained Kasumi. Once   
they were incapacitated, they had revealed their fraudulent tale to her, which eventually   
led to her losing her temper at the inexplicably elaborate scheme.   
  
"No, I don't think so. You're staying here. Once I get to the bottom of this, I'm going to   
make you two apologize for trying to drive me nuts. See you later." Kachiko headed out   
of the room and into the hall. A moment later she opened the front door, closed it behind   
her, and entered the world beyond.   
  
The time-lost girl's footsteps were confident as she hurried in a familiar direction. She   
knew damn well where she had to go to get to the bottom of matters. Sakura was the one   
person in the world Kachiko would trust with her life, and more importantly, she had no   
tolerance for Wakaba's pranks. The idea that she would was as alien as Kachiko giving   
up martial arts. It would be a simple matter to visit the best friend she ever had and hear   
from her mouth how this whole thing was an elaborate hoax and boy would Wakaba pay   
for going way over the bounds this time. Bombs and aphrodisiacs were one thing; playing   
with a poor young girl's mind was quite another.  
  
As Kachiko made her way through Nerima, the unsettled feeling that had come into being   
since watching the fake television programs, grew to ungodly proportions. The   
neighborhood was not quite right, like the Tanaka's house. While the overall layout to the   
area was the same, it was in the smaller details where the discrepancies became obvious.   
Houses weren't quite the way she remembered them. They had different colors or altered   
exteriors. Cars looked different, as though their basic designs had changed overnight.   
Everyone's clothing seems slightly off as well, especially among the teenagers. While   
there were familiar school uniforms and business suits, many of the more casual styles   
had been altered almost to the degree where it felt like she was walking through a foreign   
country. Why, some girls were even wearing clothing that bared their mid-riffs, and no   
one even seemed to take notice.  
  
"Maybe it was some sort of post-hypnotic suggestion," Kachiko murmured to herself.   
Time travel was impossible. Those two girls at her house were not her non-existent   
daughters. She was a virgin. With one notable exception, virgins didn't have children,   
and certainly not three grown offspring. It was a stupid joke that Wakaba was really going   
to be given hell for.  
  
With each block traveled, with each person passed, the uneasy feeling in Kachiko   
stomach grew until it felt like she would expel the contents of her stomach over the   
sidewalk. Panic, an emotion she rarely experienced, ate away at the edges of her   
controlled demeanor. She wanted to grab the people that passed by and order them to start   
acting normally, but she fended off such irrational thoughts with the assurance that   
Sakura could make it all better. Sakura made everything better. She had a way of   
explaining things that could make complete chaos seem, if not like order, at least   
understandable.   
  
Not a moment too soon in her opinion, Kachiko arrived at her destination. She stood   
outside the small walkway to a familiar two story structure that was on the small side.   
Sakura lived with her parents, older sister, and her sister's husband and child. It was   
terribly crowded, which was one of the reasons Sakura visited the Tendou residence so   
often; it was the only place were she could get some space of her own. After this little   
escapade, Kachiko was going to recommend Sakura move in for at least a week until   
everything felt like normal.  
  
Ten steps up the walk, the same ten steps it had always taken, and Kachiko found herself   
standing next to the entryway of the house. Finger shaking with uncharacteristic   
nervousness, she pressed the familiar red button for the doorbell (or was it a different   
shade of red?) and heard a ringing from inside. Already her spirit started to ease at the   
well-known sensations.  
  
"Coming," a feminine voice from inside announced. A handful of seconds later, the door   
opened to reveal an average-looking woman, a bit on the heavy side, in her late thirties,   
and with a long mane of black hair that appeared slightly frazzled. Automatically she   
said, "Greetings—" and stopped as her eyes focused on the young woman standing   
outside on the porch. Her eyes widened and she drew back in horror for a moment as she   
breathed out, "Kachi."  
  
Kachiko's mouth went dry. No words could come out, no matter how she tried to force   
them. Everything she had known, everything she had wanted to believe contrary to the   
evidence presented to her, was lost in a second and she understood the horrifying truth.  
  
Just as quickly the woman composed herself, drawing up to her full height before   
bowing. "I'm sorry. Please forgive me. You remind me of someone I knew from a long   
time ago." She rose from her bow and looked her visitor over more closely. "Tell me, is   
your last name Tendou?"  
  
Automatically, Kachiko managed to say, "Yes."  
  
A look of profound relief passed over the woman's features. "That explains it. You're one   
of Kachi's daughters, aren't you?"  
  
Despite feeling her world knocked out from under her feet, Kachiko's mind went from   
being completely dazed to processing information. In a far off voice, her mind managed   
to form a response using what knowledge it had gathered in the last few hours. "Yes,   
Akane. Akane Tendou."  
  
The woman bowed again. "It's an honor to meet you. What brings you here, might I ask?"  
  
Kachiko was still in a daze of sorts. It took a moment to come up with an answer. "You   
are Sakura Daisho?"  
  
"It's Ogawa now," Sakura informed her. "I've been married for some time. No one's   
called me by my maiden name for years."  
  
Years. "You knew Kachiko Tendou well, didn't you?"  
  
A pained look crossed Sakura's features. She shifted uncomfortably. "Why yes, we were   
best friends when we went to high school. But we… fell out of touch over the years. I   
doubt if you were born the last time we saw one another. I read about her death in the   
paper."  
  
"You know she's dead?" Kachiko asked, more bile rising to her throat.  
  
Sakura nodded. "It was a tragedy. Even though we'd had a falling out, it still broke my   
heart." A sniffle escaped the older woman.  
  
The way Sakura, even one whose image was distorted by the years, sniffled caught   
Kachiko's attention. "You and I… I mean you and my mother had a falling out? But you   
were best friends."  
  
Sakura gave the younger girl a sad stare. Tears were starting to form in her eyes. "Ah, my   
dear. I'm afraid you'll discover that even the greatest of friendships can mean nothing   
when a man becomes involved in the situation."  
  
"Oh." Even Kachiko's tumultuous mind didn't need more information to figure out the   
reason of why their friendship had fallen apart.  
  
"Events reached their peak late in our senior year. We exchanged harsh words. Your   
mother had quite the tongue on her. Things degenerated from there until we barely spoke   
to one another. Then we stopped talking altogether." She dabbed at her eyes with a   
handkerchief. "I just wished I could have made up with her before she passed on. It's just,   
I thought there was always enough time to do it later, so I never got around to it. And now   
it's too late."  
  
Seeing her friend in such pain served to kick Kachiko's senses back into full working   
order. Whatever the physical differences between the Sakura of Kachiko's yesterday and   
the woman before her now became meaningless. Kachiko soothed, "I know for a fact she   
forgave any disagreements you two had before she died. She… she could never hold   
anything against someone who was her best friend. Not for long. She… had so few   
friends. I know she valued your friendship most of all."  
  
Sakura appeared buoyed by the hope. "I… I'm sorry. This has all caught me off guard.   
You're certain she forgave me?"  
  
"As sure as I'm standing here now," Kachiko assured her.  
  
Sakura's obvious attempts to stem the flow of tears were to no avail. "I'm sorry. I didn't   
realize how much this bothered me. But now, when I thought forgiveness would never   
come…" She began crying some more.  
  
Automatically Kachiko reached forward and hugged Sakura, the years that stood between   
them melting away. Never had she seen her best friend cry, especially not like this. Such   
guilt, no matter the cause, pained Kachiko to see, and she did her best to remove it and   
comfort the woman.  
  
After several minutes, Sakura regained some measure of her composure. "Forgive me for   
making such a spectacle of myself."  
  
"Ah, don't worry about," Kachiko waved her hand dismissively.  
  
The response surprised Sakura. "You know, you sound exactly like your mother when   
you do that. She used to wave her hand and gave that same reply to everything she   
thought was unimportant."  
  
"I, ah, take after her a lot." Kachiko shifted uncomfortably.   
  
A soft gasp escaped Sakura's lips. "Where are my manners? Forgive me. I've been   
keeping you out here on the porch and crying on you all this time and I still don't know   
what brought you here."  
  
"My feet," Kachiko joked.  
  
"Oh dear, you seem to have inherited your mother's pitiful sense of humor as well."  
  
"Hey! I got a great sense of humor."  
  
A high pitched laugh escaped Sakura's lips. "She used to say that exact same thing   
whenever I mentioned that shortcoming." Significantly more cheerful, she said, "Now,   
what brings you here?"  
  
Kachiko shifted uncomfortably. She wanted to run, but needed to stay. Not just to be in   
the presence of someone familiar, but because she needed to know everything that had   
happened during her absent years. It would be only one piece of the puzzle, but a vital   
one. "Sak… I mean Mrs. Ogawa. Could you tell me about my mother?"  
  
The question made Sakura nod. "Now I understand."  
  
That caught Kachiko off guard. "You do? How?"  
  
The older woman smiled serenely. "She died when you were very young, and you want to   
know more about her, don't you?"  
  
Not one to pass up such an obvious opportunity, Kachiko said, "Yes. That's it. Definitely.   
I'd like to know everything about her. Oh, just one thing. Do you remember her   
disappearing for a brief while back in the summer when she was seventeen?"  
  
Sakura paused in thought. "Not that I can remember, and that was long before we started   
having problems. We saw each other practically ever day. Why do you ask?"  
  
Thinking fast enough that it surprised even her, Kachiko explained, "Someone said she   
might have taken a trip during that time, but I guess they were wrong."  
  
Not completely certain what to make of the that, Sakura simply replied, "Why don't we   
go inside? It'll be more comfortable and I can serve us some tea."  
  
"I'll take mine with some lemon and a hit of sake."  
  
A haunted expression passed ever so quickly across Sakura's features. Then the soft   
smile returned and she laughed. "Forgive me, but you are exactly like your mother. She   
wouldn't willingly drink it any other way either."  
  
"Errr, right."  
  
Sakura ushered Kachiko inside. As they entered surroundings that were familiar yet   
strangely alien to the younger girl, an errant thought occurred to Kachiko. "What   
happened to the guy you two fought over?"  
  
"I married him, so it wasn't all for nothing," Sakura admitted, blushing heavily.   
  
Intrigued at the sort of man who could come between two such close friends --and at how   
he could have possibly picked Sakura over someone as vibrant and vivacious as Kachiko   
herself-- the younger girl asked, "Is he around?"  
  
"No, he's at work. But I have a pictures of him. Here's one. You can see him for   
yourself." Sakura picked up a framed photograph that had been sitting on a stand next to   
the kitchen.  
  
Kachiko took one look at it and recoiled. "You two actually fought over him?"  
  
"Yes," Sakura sighed, holding the photo to her bosom.  
  
"Thanks for doing me a favor and winning," Kachiko murmured in disbelief.  
  
"What was that?" Sakura asked.  
  
"I can tell by the picture he has a nice personality," Kachiko blurted out. "Why don't we   
go back to the topic of my mother?"  
  
"Of course." The older woman took one last longing gaze at the photo before setting it   
down and moving to a couch so the duo could speak. Within moments they were talking   
like old friends, a fact Sakura found oddly comforting, despite the awkwardness of the   
situation.  
  
They remained in conversation until well after the sun disappeared below the horizon.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Nabiki looked at her two sisters and, for once, didn't know what to make of the situation.   
"You're absolutely certain this woman was our mother? It wasn't some impostor or evil   
duplicate from a mirror or an animate statue that looks like her or some spirit possessing   
her body?"  
  
Akane snapped, "It's not like I had any time to take a DNA test or something! I made the   
wish, and she jumped us almost as soon as she came in."  
  
Kasumi shrugged. "I'm uncertain too. I know she's young, but I can't see Mother being   
so hostile to strangers in her house. And she moved so fast that even Akane couldn't do   
anything before she was tied up. Mother didn't know any martial arts. Only Father did."  
  
"Unless she stopped practicing after she got pregnant or something. The dojo is actually   
from her side of the family, and she was an only child," Nabiki pointed out. "How about   
looking up some old photos of her and see if they match?"  
  
Kasumi placed her finger to her chin in thought. "Actually, now that I think about it, I   
don't recall seeing any pictures of mother when she was young. The only ones I can   
remember are from after she and Father were married."  
  
"That's odd," Akane said.  
  
"Yes. Now that I think about it, you're right. I wonder why that is." Nabiki began to   
ponder the dilemma, then realized there were important matters at hand. "But why did she   
come back so young?"  
  
"I didn't wish for that," Akane assured her. "I only wished she hadn't died in a car   
accident and was here with us today."  
  
"What precisely did you wish for? I mean the exact phrasing?" Nabiki asked.  
  
Hand to her temple in thought, Akane reluctantly admitted, "I'm not so sure I remember   
the exact wording. A lot's happened since then, and I was in a hurry. I did word it   
carefully though so she didn't end up dying later on from something else. I'm pretty sure I   
said I wished she hadn't been in a car accident and was alive today and with us."  
  
"That sounds about right." Kasumi continued wringing her hands in concern.  
  
Nabiki held up her own hands in surrender. "Maybe Daddy can shed some light on it.   
Right now what I want to know is where she is. Where would she go?"  
  
"How should I know?" Akane snapped.  
  
Nabiki said, "You wished for her back. Maybe there's some sort of link between you."  
  
"There is. She's my mother, and I'm her daughter. It's the same link you have."  
  
Kasumi made her way between the two and spoke in soothing tones. "Now everyone   
needs to settle down." Kasumi forced her own worries under control for the sake of her   
sisters. Her words had the desired effect as both Nabiki and Akane cooled off.   
  
Nabiki was about to say something else when the sound of the front door opening reached   
their ears. Not hearing anyone announce their arrival, all three girls remained in the living   
room waiting for the visitor to approach them.  
  
The sound of footsteps informed them they would not have to wait long. Within seconds,   
Nabiki laid her eyes upon her 'mother' for the first time in over ten years. Despite the   
difference between memory and the girl standing before her, the resemblance between   
Kachiko and her daughters, especially Akane, was too striking to miss. Despite the usual   
control she had over her emotions, Nabiki felt a sort of happiness slip through as she said,   
"Hello, Mother."  
  
Kachiko let out a tired sigh. "You must be the middle one Akane and Kasumi were telling   
me about. Nakiki."  
  
"Nabiki, actually," she corrected.   
  
"Whatever. Someone else must have picked that stupid name." Kachiko plopped down   
and sat cross-legged on the floor, staring off into space.  
  
Akane and Kasumi approached her hopefully. Akane was the first to speak. "Um, I don't   
mean to be nosy, but where did you go?"  
  
Staying in her seated position, Kachiko said in a quiet voice, "To see a friend. Now I   
know you guys were telling the truth. I really am over twenty years in the future.   
Somehow your wish pulled me out from my present and to here." She closed her eyes and   
seemed to tremble slightly. "Do you know what this means?"  
  
Akane laid a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "Yes. You're trapped in a time and place   
not of your own making. Everything you knew is changed or disappeared altogether.   
Everyone you knew has gone on without you, and you're just a memory to them. In a lot   
of ways, it's like you're alone. The entire world you grew up on is gone for good. I know   
it's terribly frightening, but I promise you we'll be with you every step of the way and   
help do whatever it takes to put you at ease."  
  
Softly, still with her eyes closed and trembling, Kachiko said, "Who cares about all that?"  
  
"What?" Akane said.  
  
Suddenly Kachiko shot to her feet, knocking Akane over. Pumping her fist to the sky, the   
time-lost girl shouted, "Don't you get it?! I cheated death! BWHAHAHAHA!"  
  
The trio of girls cringed and drew back.  
  
A cold aura of power glowed around Kachiko. In delirious glee she shouted, "I have a   
second chance at everything! I mean, getting cut down while I was still relatively in the   
prime of my life? Talk about being cheated. And to have it happen to someone as nice,   
cute, and intelligent as me? I tell you, when something like that happens, it makes you   
think there isn't such a thing as justice in this world. And then there was how pitiful my   
life was before I died. Sakura told me some of the stupid things I did after I ended up in a   
car accident and damaged my leg so badly I could barely perform martial arts anymore. I   
can't believe I let my parents convince me since I was shot as a martial artist I needed to   
give up the art, settle down, and marry young so someone could carry on the dojo. And   
having several children before I was twenty-five? Why, it's like I was given a death   
sentence before I was dead."  
  
"Excuse me, but we are those children, you know!" Akane shouted. Nabiki was scowling   
at the raving woman as well, while Kasumi looked truly disturbed at her mother's   
declarations.  
  
Kachiko didn't hear a word. She yelled to the sky, "This time, I'm really going to do   
things right! None of this marrying young, having kids, or crossing streets! I'm going to   
have fun, fun, fun until I keel over from exhaustion, and then I'm really going to cut   
loose! And it begins now!"   
  
Without giving the astonished girls a second glance, Kachiko headed directly for the   
refrigerator and began rummaging through it. Within seconds she pulled out a large bottle   
of sake and removed the top.  
  
Kasumi waved her hands and tried getting her mother's attention. "Excuse me, but that's   
father and Mr. Saotome's sake. I don't think it's really proper to…"  
  
Placing the bottle to her lips, Kachiko tilted her head back and proceeded to drink. The   
bottle never left her lips as she guzzled the liquid down in loud gulps that filled the   
otherwise shocked silent room. The alcohol was gone as quickly as if it had been poured   
down a drain.   
  
"Ah! Now that's the way to start things off!" Kachiko tossed the bottle against a wall,   
shattering the glass container and creating a small collection of shards in that area of the   
room.   
  
"I'll clean that up," Kasumi said in a daze as she left the room to grab a broom and dust   
pan.  
  
"What's all this racket?" A new voice, carrying an authoritative tone, demanded from the   
doorway leading to the living room.  
  
Everyone turned to see Soun Tendou looking crossly upon the scene. His anger was short-  
lived as his eyes fell upon a young woman again for the first time. He blinked once for   
Disbelief. A second time for Denial. A third for Acceptance.  
  
He was across the room in a flash, embracing the impossible dream. "Oh, my love, I've   
missed you so much!" he wept.  
  
So consumed was his mind in being given his heart's deepest desire, that it failed to   
notice the girl stiffen under his grasp. Lost in turmoil, it failed to register the tightening of   
muscles in response to his familiar grip. And though his mind was preoccupied, his body   
still responded to the savage uppercut dealt to it by flying up into the air like a missile,   
through the second floor, through the roof, and across a distance well out of sight of the   
residents of the house.  
  
"What the hell was that?!" Kachiko huffed out, her fist still coiled and prepared to lash   
out at anything else that might try to jump her.  
  
In a tired voice, Nabiki said, "That, was your husband and father of your children: Soun   
Tendou."  
  
Kachiko stomped her foot in anger and pointed up to the hole in the ceiling. "Don't be   
stupid! There's no way I'd ever marry an old fossil like that! And he's a pervert, too! He   
ran right in here and groped me! I feel like I need a bath! Ewwww!"  
  
Patience wearing thin, Nabiki said, "He was somewhat younger when you were married,   
and since he's your husband, he's done a lot of more intimate things with you- myself,   
Kasumi, and Akane being proof positive of that."  
  
"The hell he has!" Kachiko raged. "I'm as virgin as pristine snow, and intend to remain   
that way until I find the right guy. If that geriatric lech even looks at me funny, I'll rip off   
his !#$ balls and feed them to the fish out in back."   
  
Finished cleaning up the broken glass, Kasumi looked worriedly at her mother. "Oh dear.   
Does this mean I should look up the number of a marriage counselor for you and Father?"  
  
Kachiko ominously intoned, "It means you'd better look up the number of a morgue if he   
tries to lay one more perverted finger on me again."  
  
"What's all this racket about?" A different voice asked from the doorway where Soun had   
entered only minutes before.   
  
Kachiko was about to bellow out a general condemnation about clobbering the next   
pervert that dared to enter the room when her eyes alighted on the speaker and the words   
floated out of her mind and into the void beyond.  
  
Upon hearing the shouting, Ranma had entered the room fully expecting the typical scene   
of carnage and confusion. Instead he found himself looking at Akane, who had   
mysteriously gained narrower hips. It took him a second to look more closely at the face   
and realize, "Hey, you aren't Akane."  
  
Kachiko sauntered forward. "Damn straight I'm not. My name is Kachiko, but I insist you   
call me Kachi." She stood next to Ranma and looked deeply into his eyes. "And what's   
your name?"  
  
Confronted with someone who looked so much Akane, but was looking at him in a way   
Akane definitely did not, confused him enough that he stumbled over his words as he   
spoke. "I'm, ah, Ranma Saotome."  
  
"And what brings you here?" Kachiko asked. "Besides your feet," she added.  
  
"I, ah, live here." It was almost said as a question.  
  
Kachiko all but purred, "Well, well, well. It looks like there's hope for the future yet."  
  
Collecting some of his senses, Ranma got out, "What's that supposed to me-umph!" The   
rest of his words were smothered as Kachiko's lips pressed against his.  
  
Ranma's eyes widened in shock at the move. Kasumi covered her mouth in surprise while   
Nabiki merely shook her head.   
  
Akane had the most profound response as she shouted, "Ranma! How dare you kiss my   
mother like that!"  
  
Ranma darted his lips away from Kachiko's and gestured wildly with his hands while   
shouting, "I did not kiss her! She kissed m… did you say she's your mother?"  
  
"Actually, I didn't kiss anyone. I jus' lost my balance since the room's spinning so   
much," Kachiko explained as she slid down Ranma and all but pooled onto the floor at   
his feet. "I feel dizzy and nauseous. I think I'm suffering from the side effects of time   
travel."  
  
"You're suffering from the side effects of pounding down a whole bottle of sake," Nabiki   
stated coolly.  
  
Kachiko snorted, "Ha! I'll have you know I've drank entire bottles of sake before and   
been perfectly fine. Observe." The young girl rose effortlessly to her feet and stood as   
rigidly as a tree.  
  
Nabiki walked over and tapped a single finger against her mother's chest. Kachiko   
proceeded to fall over and land with a thud, just like a tree that had been chopped down.   
"Didn't drink any of them all at once, did you?" she said to the girl on the floor.  
  
"A minor detail that escaped my notish," Kachiko slurred. "Ranma, help me to my bed,   
would you?"  
  
Seeing what terrible shape the girl was in, Ranma did as he was requested by picking her   
up in his arms. "Um, which bed are you sleeping in?"  
  
"Yours will do," she said groggily.  
  
"And where do I sleep?"  
  
"Don't be shilly. It's your bed. You'll be sleeping in it too,"   
  
"She'll be sleeping in my room," Akane said in no uncertain terms. "I'm responsible for   
her being here, so it's the least I can do until we get things sorted out."  
  
In a completely bewildered voice, Ranma asked, "Um, exactly what is going on here?" as   
the girl in his arms began singing, "I'm not very dead; I'm just very happy," extremely off   
key.  
  
Akane shook her head at the scene. "First, we put her to bed, then we'll get to the   
explanations. It's going to be a long and confusing one this time, even for around here."  
  
Ranma groaned in surrender.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Well, got this one finished. This was a transition chapter, and subsequently I wasn't able   
to get into the flow I really wanted to with it. But it was necessary since I had to get some   
groundwork put down and the way paved for future chapters. Hopefully, the next chapter   
will be more in line with the more humorous style of storytelling I really want to go for in   
this series as Kachi begins her first steps in actually interacting with the fun loving lot of   
people around her, and we get to see their reaction to her.  
  
Special thanks to lots of people too numerous to name. 


	3. The Things We Wish For chapter 3

The Things We Wish For...  
Chapter 2  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
If you're interested in prereading, let me know.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present, there's only the slight complications that she's there at the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko Tendou awoke with both a start and a splitting headache. 'Splitting' in the sense that she would gladly have split her head open and removed her brain if it would have brought any form of relief.  
  
Summoning enough willpower to actualize moving rather than just conceptualizing it in her mind, Kachiko groggily rose from her bed and found herself confronted with the choice of exiting via the door or window. The window offered the option of quickly removing the headache by plummeting headfirst into the ground like a giant lawn dart. But the dream she had last night, the one in which she was told she had met a grisly demise at the age of thirty courtesy of a semi, made thinking of anything remotely related to dying distasteful. Perhaps the elaborate dream had been her subconscious warning her of what the future could hold should she not tread carefully, or at least not look both ways before crossing a street.   
  
"Never again." That the words were whispered did nothing to decrease the needles of pain that reverberated in her skull. There had to be aspirin downstairs to relieve the headache, or barring that, some of the hair of the dog that bit her to take the edge off the ache.   
  
Finally, she summoned enough energy to actually move her body out of the bed and stood up. Employing her razor-honed abilities of concentration, she managed the difficult task of coordinating the movement of her feet so that she could walk in, if not a straight line, at least a path that took her in the general direction of the door. She shuffled forward, making a mental note to beat out her rug later. It was lumpy and produced a sharp "whoof" of air when she stepped on it.  
  
Further sounds of movement came from behind Kachiko, making her pause on her unexpectedly arduous journey to leave the room. "Please tell me that was a really large mouse I just stepped on." A lump rose in her throat, along with a hefty portion of bile from her stomach, as she turned and beheld a sight she most assuredly did not want to see.   
  
Akane Tendou rose from where she had been sleeping on the floor and gave her mother a hesitant, "Hello."  
  
There was one last chance. Kachiko stepped forward and raised her hand. She brought it forward and cradled Akane's chin softly. Her fingertips gently traced a path from chin to cheek, caressing the flesh so delicately it was like a touch of the wind rather than the hand of a human being.  
  
The move struck a familiar chord within Akane. The gesture was identical to when she was a little girl and had hurt herself falling down a hill or scraping her knee trying to match her father's moves when he taught her martial arts. A surge of emotion roiled through her entire being, eliciting an affection she had not known in years. Water began to fill her eyes as she opened her mouth and found herself saying, "OW!"  
  
Kachiko stopped pinching the cheek and slammed her fist into her palm. "#$%^! That proves this isn't a dream. That means that whole time travel crap really did happen."  
  
Rubbing her reddened cheek, Akane snapped, "You're supposed to pinch yourself, not someone else, to prove if something is a dream!"   
  
"Don't be ridiculous. That would hurt. This way is much better and just as conclusive."  
  
"Exactly how does pinching me prove you aren't dreaming?"  
  
"Your scream of pain would have awakened me if it was a dream," Kachiko explained.  
  
Akane couldn't argue with the logic of that, largely in part because she was uncertain if any was actually involved.   
  
Leaving her youngest daughter confused in the middle of the room, Kachiko headed for the door once again. She paused as she finally noticed the rather large, vaguely humanoid, shaped hole in the wall to the right of it. Curious, she opened the door and looked out in the hallway.   
  
There, lying in a heap at the base of the wall opposite the hole, was Soun Tendou. It took Kachiko a moment to recall exactly what he was doing there, besides lying motionless. Twice during the night the elderly pervert had broken into her bedroom crying her name and attempted to molest her. Each time she had sent him away courtesy of the often used --and highly effective-- "Hentai-Crusher" backfist, able to render perverts immobile in a single assault while preventing them from laying a single lecherous digit on her pristine person. She did give the geriatric fossil credit; he had recovered from the first attack after only a couple of hours before launching an ill-fated second offensive.   
  
A low moaning issued forth from the heap. Soun unfurled himself from the folded over position he was curled in and unsteadily rose to his feet. As his eyes locked onto the girl standing before him, he wailed, "Kachi-chan!" and rushed forward, arms wide open to embrace her.   
  
The only thing he managed to embrace was her fist in his face as she spun in a circle to build up velocity and lashed out, summarily dispatching him once again. The force of the blow embedded him completely in the wall this time. Only a series of low moans indicated he was still alive.  
  
"Resilient old perv," Kachiko commented as she walked past his twitching form. She continued heading downstairs, even as Akane's cry of, "Dad!" reached her ears. Kachiko sighed at that. If her father had been that perverted, there's no way she'd ever admit to their being related, even under threat of torture. And the girls' outrageous claim that she would ever marry such a dirty old man made Kachiko wonder just what drug they thought she was on that would have made her commit such a stupid act. It was inconceivable. And since it was inconceivable, she stopped thinking about it and instead concentrated on getting some breakfast. She hadn't eaten since lunch yesterday; the whole time travel thing and finding out she died pretty much ruining her appetite. Besides, she needed to take an aspirin or twelve to make the pounding in her skull cease.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi Tendou had been a busy girl. She had been up all night, not getting the least bit of sleep, as she pondered the dilemma that had been presented by yesterday's events. The young woman that had been delivered to their home did indeed resemble their mother in appearance, albeit a much younger version of Kachiko Tendou than anyone had ever imagined. But the time-lost girl's behavior was inconsistent with the memories Kasumi had of her. Actually, aside from the fact this youthful version of Kachiko was female and spoke Japanese, there were no similarities in behavior at all. Obviously something was wrong. There was the possibility it was merely disorientation from the time travel that had caused the erratic behavior, but even after she had been in the present for the majority of the day, Kachiko's conduct continued to remain bizarre. Almost deranged, in fact. There had to be some rational explanation for it.   
  
And in a flash of insight it came to her. The answer was quite simple. After all, hadn't there been a point in Kasumi's own life where she had acted horribly out of character, perpetrating Loathsome, Terrible, and Unspeakable acts upon her family and those around her? Of course, she hadn't been responsible for her actions, but she had still engaged in them all the same. And now her mother was displaying similar behaviors: tying up visitors, committing acts of violence on her husband, swearing like a sailor, and drinking like a full fledged alcoholic rather than in controlled quantities like she used to. The signs all pointed to one thing.  
  
Kachiko Tendou had been possessed by an oni.  
  
Kasumi felt thrilled at the knowledge that her mother would return to normal shortly. Of course Kasumi couldn't possibly try to bludgeon her mother in an attempt to exorcise the demon possessing her. At least not at first. But there were other alternatives. It had taken her the majority of the night consulting one of the numerous books Dr. Tofu had loaned her and getting the paper and inscriptions correct, but after much toil her project was successfully completed. Kasumi felt satisfied that what she held in her hand was identical to the pictures shown in the book. Now all that remained was to apply it to her mother, and then all would be well. Hopefully.  
  
Although Kasumi was prepared for things reverting back to normal on their own. Hoping that was the case, she had spent what little time remained before her mother woke up to reverting the kitchen back to what it was in the days when Kachiko Tendou was still alive. Over the years, Kasumi had switched things around to suit her own personal needs and tendencies when cooking. But now she had decided to try to help her mother return to her old self through less drastic means if possible, and hoped that seeing the kitchen in its original form might jog memories on their own.   
  
The sound of footsteps approaching from the upstairs made Kasumi tense up. They drew closer until Kachiko entered the kitchen.  
  
"What's to eat around here?" she grumbled, yawning and scratching her breast.  
  
Kasumi smiled blissfully and pointed to the arrangement of cooking materials that were openly displayed for the young girl's benefit. "I decided to wait until you showed up so we could cook together, just like we always used to do."  
  
Kachiko gave the utensils and unprepared foods a flat stare. "Tell you what, you go ahead and whip something up, and I'll watch. Oh, and grab me some warm water and a cold beer before you get started. I'm thirsty."  
  
"Don't you think it's a bit early for that?"   
  
Kachiko considered the question as she sat down at the dining table. "You're probably right. Better just make it the beer."  
  
Oh dear. The behavior was exactly what Kasumi had been afraid of. Her mother never passed up the opportunity to cook. Some of their happiest times together had been spent humming some tune while preparing a meal for the whole family to gather around and enjoy. But now she was continuing to act in decidedly non-motherly ways. It was time to take action, before her poor, confused mother did something she might truly regret.   
  
Walking over to where her mother was seated, Kasumi bent low and stuck a piece of paper on the time-lost girl's forehead.  
  
Kachiko stared cross-eyed at the piece of paper dangling in front of her eyes. "This is some sort of weird napkin, right?"  
  
Shaking her head, Kasumi said, "No, it isn't. It's an ofuda to drive the oni out and make you feel better and more like yourself. Do you feel more like yourself?"  
  
Kachiko considered that. "If I say no, what will you do next?"  
  
Kasumi picked up a hammer she had nearby for just such a scenario. "I can hit you in the head and drive the oni out directly."  
  
"I feel wonderfully normal! Your napkin did wonders!" Kachiko shouted gleefully.   
  
"That's nice." Kasumi put the hammer back down.  
  
Kachiko made certain to leave her unnatural smile right where it was. How wonderful. One of her 'daughters' was completely deranged. Best to humor the girl until Kachiko had a chance to call a psychiatric ward and have this 'Kasumi' institutionalized for her own good, as well as the time-lost girl's own peace of mind. Kachiko had to hand it to herself. Not a mother for a day, and she was already acting like a parent, protecting both herself and the other people living in her home from harm. Perhaps it would be wise to call the police to take care of the pervert that kept trying to fondle her as well.  
  
Kachiko was still in the midst deciding how best to subdue Kasumi when a red and blue blur passed by the open sliding door leading to the outside.  
  
Ranma shouted," Nyaa! You can't touch me, Old Man."  
  
A black and white blur raced past, taking a swipe at Ranma, who deftly evaded the blow.  
  
Eyes widened in horror, Kachiko shouted, "Look out! It's an excessively violent panda! I'll protect you, Ranma!"   
  
With one graceful leap she launched herself from the table, out the door, and into the air, directly aimed at the attacking panda. Her left foot remained coiled back until it was within striking distance of the large mammal, at which point she lashed forward with a kick, shouting, "Ailuropoda Melanoleuca Bloody Assault!"   
  
The bottom of her foot connected with a resounding thud to the panda's jaw, knocking the animal to the ground and stunning it.  
  
Ranma stopped leaping backward and said to the girl, "Ah, wait, that's not-"  
  
Kachiko didn't pause for a second as she grabbed the fallen panda by the fur and heaved it over her shoulder using a body toss. The force of the throw, combined with the panda's mass, served to knock over one of the larger stones next to the koi pond as the furry mammal impacted solidly with it. The animal landed in the depression where the bottom of the rock had rested.  
  
"That's not a real... Why is there an ofuda sticking to your head?" Ranma asked.  
  
"It's so I don't get hit in the head with a hammer," Kachiko explained as finished things up by picking up the fallen boulder and driving it back into its former resting spot. Four paws, that could barely be seen poking out of the bottom, twitched slightly.  
  
Kachiko dusted her hands off dramatically. "That takes care of that."  
  
Now irate --at being ignored repeatedly rather than having his father ending up buried under a boulder-- Ranma said, "If you'd listen to what I had to say, you could have saved yourself the hassle. That wasn't really a panda. That was my pop."  
  
Kachiko's eyes widened in surprise. "You were raised by pandas? Oh you poor, poor, boy." She began patting him on the head. "At least you weren't raised by badgers. They're irritable little things. Only slightly less annoying than weasels."  
  
Ranma darted out of under her grasp. "I didn't say I was raised by pandas! That was really my father. A magic curse turns him into a panda."  
  
Kachiko looked Ranma over with a more careful eye. "Now I see."  
  
"You do?" Ranma was surprised she believed his story without any firsthand evidence or further elaboration. On the other hand, she had been magically transported through time, so maybe accepting the idea of magic curses was easy when compared to that.  
  
Nodding her head, Kachiko said, "Yes. I see that thing must have been rabid and bit you and now you're suffering from delusions. Where's the bite? I'll suck the rabies out." She began examining him with her hands, fondling him in some very sensitive areas of his body.  
  
"Quit it!" Ranma squirmed out of her reach, much to her disappointment.  
  
At that moment Nabiki chose to enter the backyard, followed closely on her heels by Kasumi. "Why is Mr. Saotome buried under a boulder, dare I ask?"  
  
Kachiko pointed at the boulder. "That horrible panda went feral and attacked Ranma."  
  
"Pop's not feral, just stupid!" Ranma insisted.  
  
Kachiko began wagging her finger at Ranma. "You can't be too careful around pandas, Ranma. They're incredibly dangerous. Now let me tell you why."  
  
Clapping her hands in glee at the familiar posture, Kasumi said, "Oh, Mother's about to give a lecture. The magic ward must be working. She's starting to act normal." Kasumi sat down and made herself comfortable as her attention was raptly focused upon her mother.  
  
It took a moment for Kachiko to recover from that one. She turned back to Ranma, "Where was I?"  
  
"Dangerous pandas," Ranma provided.   
  
"Ah, yes." Kachiko began wagging her finger again. "Pandas are incredibly dangerous. I can vouch for this from personal experience. Let me tell you a time several months ago... which was actually twenty years ago for you guys, when I found out just how terrible pandas really are. It all started on what was a typical morning. I was walking to school with Sakura. As was our wont on such days, we ended up embroiled in an intense discussion on matters of a deeply philosophical nature...  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"...And I'm telling you Speed and Trixie were made for one another!"  
  
"No way!" Kachiko protested. "Speed's desire to race superseded everything in his life, including women. They were together since the series began, but their relationship moved absolutely nowhere. Hell, the two never even kissed."  
  
"The two of them were just taking things slowly," Sakura insisted.  
  
"He had no interest in a relationship, at least with her," Kachiko scoffed. "And don't give me that Trixie wanted to 'take things slowly'. She would have parted her legs for him if he asked from the first episode on."  
  
"Some woman aren't quite as loose with their affections as you."  
  
"I'm not THAT loose. And I'm telling you, Trixie was just along for the ride, and I mean that in every sense of the word. If he had felt anything other than a passing interest in her, things would have progressed much more quickly. The only reason there were together at all was that there weren't any other alternatives. She was the only female regular in the series. If you had waved a couple of hot, willing gals under Speed's nose you'd have seen how committed to Trixie he was. Unless he suffered from FS. He seemed like he might be the type."  
  
Sakura hesitated for a moment before saying, "I know I'm going to hate myself for asking, but I just have to know. What exactly is, 'FS'?"  
  
"Fixation Syndrome. I came up with the term myself," Kachiko stated proudly.   
  
"I knew it," Sakura sighed.   
  
Unaffected by the her friend's attitude, Kachiko continued in a tone more suited for a classroom than a walk to school. "Fixation Syndrome is a condition by which one member of the species, especially if she's had limited or no contact with members of the opposite sex, will fixate on the first available romantic interest that comes around and decides that he's the one she loves no matter what. Reason and reality take a hike since that person is so fixated on that one interest that she will ignore any other potential partners that come along afterwards, never mind if the other men are actually better suited to her as a romantic partner."  
  
"That's not Fixation Syndrome, you idiot! It's called love at first sight!" Sakura spat in disgust.   
  
"Ha! There is no such thing as love at first sight. It's lust at first sight. It's completely based on superficial physical attraction and nothing more. Oh, sometimes that initial lust will lead to love, which is why some people trick themselves into believing it was love all the time, but they're wrong. The first time you lay eyes on some hot guy and want to bear his children is always the same: it's purely desire. If you find out afterwards the guy's a major creep, you tell yourself correctly it was a fleeting attraction, not love. But if it does work out and you do fall for him then you tell yourself it was love the whole time. It's a convenient lie people tell themselves so they don't think they're shallow and that the initial contact they had with the person they love was based solely on the urge to get into their lover's underwear rather than any more noble reasons. True love only comes about after you get to know someone, and is impossible to determine with a single glance."  
  
"No wonder you never have steady boyfriends with an approach to life like that." Sakura shook her head in pity. "I happen to believe in true love. There's someone out there that you are destined to meet and spend the rest of your life with and nothing will ever come between your feelings for one another, just like Speed and Trixie. It's called Fate, and there's nothing you can do to change it."  
  
"Ha!"  
  
"I knew you'd say that."  
  
Kachiko continued on, as though her friend had said nothing. "Fate is the excuse of the lazy and stupid. It's the ultimate cop out in any given situation. It implies there's no such thing as free will and that life is pointless, since it's going to play out as it will and you have no effect on it. Think about it. You couldn't possibly be blamed for anything, since it was always predetermined that what you did was always going to happen. Case in point."   
  
And with that Kachiko shoved Sakura. The push, while not intended to hurt, did send Sakura reeling backward several feet away, arms spinning around like gyrating windmills as she tried to regain her balance. It was all in vain as she landed on her bottom with an audible thump.  
  
The fallen girl quickly rose to her feet, the fires of anger in her eyes.  
  
Kachiko waggled her finger in a warding gesture at Sakura, "Ah, ah, ah. Can't blame me. It was your fate to get knocked on your ass by me at that exact moment. There was no other possible outcome, after all." Kachiko placed her hands in her hips in obvious satisfaction at believing her point made.  
  
At the same moment, an anvil smashed into the ground right where Sakura would have been had she continued on her course, shattering the concrete with a thunderous crash.  
  
A voice called out from an open window high above in the building. "Tetsuo, I told you to throw the bucket of dirty water out, not the anvil."  
  
"Sorry, Mother."  
  
Kachiko pointed an accusatory finger at the anvil. "This proves nothing! Do you hear me?! Absolutely nothing!"  
  
Sakura returned to Kachiko's side, making certain to show her companion the oversized words she had written on a sheet of notebook paper. "Speed and Trixie: 2gether 4ever."   
  
"Oh, just shut up," Kachiko grumbled as they resumed their walk to school.  
  
They hadn't made it more than a couple of blocks when a car horn beeped behind them. Neither bothered to turn around as they recognized the owner of the vehicle solely by the sound of the horn.   
  
"I so do not want to deal with this," Kachiko snarled as the limousine pulled up alongside them.   
  
The motorized hum of the rear passenger window rolling down into the car reached the girls' ears. Reluctantly, they turned to see a handsome face with perfectly crafted brown hair stick out of the window and peer closely at them. "Well, if my eyes don't deceive me, I have the good fortune to behold two lovely visions of beauty: the vibrant Kachiko Tendou and the ever sophisticated Sakura Daisho."  
  
Voice dripping with venom, Kachiko grimly intoned. "Great. If it isn't the walking ego, and God's self-proclaimed gift to all things female, Icky Slutzenin."  
  
"Ah, that's Ichiro Sanzenin," the youth corrected.   
  
"Your nickname is more appropriate," Sakura pointed out with distaste.  
  
"Do you have a reason for fouling our air with your breath, Icky?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"Foul breath?" Ichiro popped a breath mint in his mouth. As he sucked on it, he said, "I have come to offer you a ride to school in my limousine."  
  
Scrunching up her face, Kachiko said, "With all the action that's happened on that backseat? I don't think so, Slutzenin. I bet it's got stains all over it."  
  
"I always use rubber sheets," he stated proudly.  
  
Sakura looked past Ichiro and into the limo. "He's right. They're on there now."  
  
"Now I wonder why that would be," Kachiko said, her eyebrow twitching slightly.   
  
"I assure you my intentions are innocent and noble," Ichiro said.  
  
"That would be a first, and I somehow doubt you're starting to act non-lecherous solely for our benefit. Let's go, Sakura." Kachiko began walking away from the car.  
  
Ichiro ordered the driver to follow. "Come now. It's a lovely day for a drive. It'll be much easier accepting a ride than walking like a commoner."  
  
Kachiko stopped suddenly. She turned and examined the car more closely. "But how can you give us a ride when your tire's flat?"  
  
"I'm afraid you're mistaken. My tires are just fine," Ichiro assured her.  
  
Kachiko gave a swift kick to the nearest one. The sidewall detonated with a bang from the force of the blow.   
  
Exiting the vehicle, Ichiro informed his driver, "Kaneda, I'll be walking the rest of the way to school escorted by these lovely women."  
  
Kachiko said, "But how can you walk us to school when you have a broken leg?"  
  
"I'm afraid you're mistaken. My legs are just fine," Ichiro assured her.  
  
Sakura barely managed to hold Kachiko back and prevent her from repeating her previous action on Ichiro's limbs. After several moments of fast talking, she successfully calmed Kachiko down to the point where she would not dispatch Ichiro out of hand. Once firmly settled, the trio began walking to school again, Kachiko certain to keep one coiled fist aimed in Ichiro's direction.  
  
The rest of the journey passed without incident until the students arrived at the school. Once they passed through the gates welcoming them to Furinkan High, they paused and took in the unusual sight before them. In simplest terms, the front of the school yard appeared to have been converted into an archeological dig, complete with foreign laborers singing in perfect harmony with one another. Huge amounts of earth had been upturned and dozens of digging vehicles continued to burrow ever deeper into the ground.  
  
"Looks like he's at it again," Sakura sighed.   
  
Kachiko looked around until she spotted a familiar figure. He stood at the center of the site, wearing a familiar pith helmet, and giving orders to the laborers. The trio approached the youth as he ordered a crane to scoop out a section of earth nearby, before returning to some papers on a table set up next to him.  
  
"Gosunkugi, what are you up to now?" Kachiko asked.  
  
The sunken eyes of the emaciated figure turned their attention from the ancient scrolls. In a sad voice lacking any indication of hope, Gosunkugi said, "Hello, Kachi. Sakura. Icky."  
  
"Ichiro."   
  
Kachiko tapped her foot impatiently.  
  
Gosunkugi picked up the cue. "I've recently uncovered conclusive evidence which indicates the ancient --but immortal and incredibly beautiful-- demon Goddess' tomb is buried on the grounds of a school in the nearby area. I thought this might be it, so I'm excavating. Dig more to the left," he shouted weakly at some laborers.  
  
"Gos, Gos, Gos," Kachiko sighed. "Haven't you learned by now that digging up the ground is no way to get a girlfriend?"  
  
"It is if you're a necrophile," Ichiro pointed out.   
  
Kachiko ignored the comment and went to a nearby sack that was resting against the table. It made jingling sounds as the plethora of odds and ends clinked and clacked within. "Look at what all this digging has got you." She began pulling items out of the sack and tossing them left and right. "Holy Grails. Arks of some convent. A crappy old spear that belonged to some putz named Longinus. Dead Sea scrolls. Necronomicons. Second editions, mind you. Lemurian Serpent Crowns. A philosopher's stone. Gos, you hate philosophy." She tossed the stone aside (the item turning the pile of earth it struck into gold) and pulled out something that caught her attention. "What's this computer keyboard doing in here?"  
  
"I found it in a cave in Norway," Gosunkugi explained. "According to the ancient stone tablet that was found next to it, it's an ancient interface system for something called Yggdrasil, the World Tree, which is said to control the world. I haven't tried it yet since I don't know what it'll do. It's unwise to fool around with something that might control reality as we know it. "  
  
"That's probably for the best," Kachiko agreed solemnly, then punched a key.   
  
A stroke of lightning reached down from the heavens and struck Ichiro.  
  
Kachiko pushed another.  
  
A plague of locusts descended on the fried boy.  
  
A third key was pushed.   
  
Day became night.  
  
Sakura smacked Kachiko in the back of the head. "Turn the sun back on."  
  
Kachiko pushed a fourth key and light was restored. She stared at the keyboard, and an insane gleam filled her eyes. "Well now, it seems I have the power of God in my hands. MUHAHAHAHA!"  
  
Hesitantly, Gosunkugi said, "Actually, Ichiro has a metal plate in his skull, we've been having problems with locusts lately, and there was a solar eclipse scheduled for today."  
  
The fires of megalomania died in Kachiko's eyes. She sighed and looked mournfully at the keyboard. "So much for omnipotence." She handed it back to Gosunkugi, who returned it to its proper place in his sack.  
  
Sakura asked, "Exactly why is it you're on this insane quest to discover this ancient demon? Generally people don't want to consort with them, unless they're evil, and you're not."  
  
"Skinny and scary looking, but not evil," Kachiko confirmed.   
  
Gosunkugi said, "I've become convinced that this beautiful demon goddess is nothing of the kind, but is in fact an artificial life form created in a magnificent world in another dimension that traveled here to Japan in ancient times and was buried so that someone would wake her up in the future. If I'm right, then all I need to do to make her mine is find her, awaken her, and she'll be loyal to me and me alone. At the very least she'll owe me big for digging her out of the ground and reactivating her."  
  
Sakura asked, "But why? And put that box down!"  
  
Kachiko placed the sealed jewelry box, with the name 'Pandora' etched in gold on the top, back in Gosunkugi's sack. "It fell out," she explained and began whistling innocently.  
  
Gosunkugi trembled slightly. "You don't understand. I have to do this. It's my last chance."  
  
"Last chance for what?" Sakura asked.  
  
"My last chance to get a date for the Senior Prom!" Gosunkugi wailed.   
  
"Oh, gee, Gos, that's still a year away," Kachiko said in an exasperated tone. "Why are you so worried about it?"  
  
"Because I already asked all the girls and was turned down," he sniffled.   
  
Sakura scoffed at that. "Oh come on. Just because you got turned down by a few girls is no reason to panic."  
  
"I didn't say a few girls. I said all of them."  
  
Kachiko looked at him with a mounting suspicion in her eyes. "When you say, 'all the girls' you mean everyone in your classes?"  
  
"No."  
  
"You mean every girl in our grade?" Sakura asked with wide-eyed skepticism.  
  
"No. I mean every girl in our high school. Every grade. They all turned me down," he sobbed.  
  
Sakura laughed. It was that nervous little, 'oh god that's so pitiful even I feel sorry, but better you than me' laugh people gave. "That is... sort of bad."  
  
Voice filled with hope, Kachiko said, "Did you try the eighth graders at the junior high? They'll be freshmen next year and-"  
  
"Yes! They turned me down too," Gosunkugi sobbed.  
  
Kachiko patted him on the shoulder sympathetically. "Boy, that is bad. I'd do anything to help."  
  
Gosunkugi's sobbing was momentarily interrupted. "You'd go out with me?"  
  
"Gos, when I say 'anything' I don't mean that literally. I mean it in the sense that I'll help you if it's not inconvenient for me and I have nothing better to do. But maybe Sakura would..." she let that trail off as, out of the corner of her eye, she caught Sakura ferociously shaking her head.  
  
Gosunkugi's shoulders --which were called that due to the fact that was the place where his arms were attached to his body rather than from any actual broadness to them-- slumped in abject defeat, which was only slightly lower than the usual slump they had. "Let's face facts. I should just kill myself and get it over with. The only way I'm going to get a date is if some girl that has a thing for skinny, pathetic, guys with no self-esteem suddenly appears out of nowhere and asks me out."  
  
There was a tapping on Gosunkugi's shoulder. A voice so melodious voice it could have charmed snakes sang out, "Excuse please."  
  
The quartet turned around. Before them was a vision that could have come straight out of a Scandinavian legend. The young woman standing there could have passed for a Valkyrie, save that she bore neither armor nor a flying horse, or gave any indication of nabbing someone and taking them to Valhalla. She possessed long, golden tresses that flowed backward in the air, despite the lack of wind. High cheekbones highlighted a painfully beautiful face that could have graced the cover of any magazine. She had long legs with firm muscle tone, and an ample bust that seemed to defy gravity. The only thing mundane about her was the school uniform she wore, but even that only enhanced her tremendous assets, and emphasized the aura of seduction about her.   
  
"Almost makes you wanna become a lesbian, doesn't it?" Kachiko said to Sakura.   
  
Her friend nodded in agreement and wiped at the slight bit of drool that had escaped her mouth.  
  
"Hello, I am to be introducing myself. I am foreign exchange student from Sweden. My name is Ingrid Torson. I am to be new here and wish to make friends."  
  
Ichiro was at her side in an instant. He held her hand affectionately in his. "I'll do better than that. I'll marry you right now."  
  
Ingrid looked away from him and at the others. "This is a, how do you say...?"  
  
"Lech?" Sakura offered.  
  
The Nordic beauty considered that. "No."  
  
"Jerk?" Gosunkugi said.  
  
Again she shook her head.  
  
Kachiko piped up. "A real !#&*^, that can !%^%, with his *&^%^?"  
  
Ingrid said, "I am thinking my Japanese is not so good, since what I think you say cannot be done with that. Not even as double-jointed as I am, could I be doing it."  
  
"How about 'pervert'?" Sakura ventured.  
  
Ingrid's eyes lit up. "Yes. That is word I look for. Pervert. Is he?"  
  
"Won the All Japan Pervert Championship for Sleaziest Pick Up Line last year," Kachiko confirmed.  
  
"Ah. Good." Ingrid drove her knee straight into the area between Ichiro's legs. He doubled over in agony and crumpled into a tiny, mewling heap on the ground.  
  
A plague of locusts descended upon him.  
  
Ingrid walked closer until she was standing next to Gosunkugi, easily violating what should have been his personal space. She was forced to look down at him, due to the fact that he only came up to about chest level on her. She turned a sultry stare upon him that seemed to ignite the air. "Forgive me for saying and being forward, but you are reminding me of my ex-boyfriend. I am hoping that we can be friends. Maybe close friends. Perhaps we go out to dinner and get to know one another better after school. I pay for everything, of course."  
  
Shoulders suddenly firming up for the first time in his life, Gosunkugi turned away, an amused grin on his face. "Well, I don't know. I have so many women after me, I'm not sure if I can fit you Urk!"  
  
Kachiko grabbed the fidgeting youth by the collar and roughly pulled him aside. She whispered in his ear, "I swear to god if you try to play hard to get with the blonde bombshell that just came onto you for one second longer, I will rip off your !#$% and feed it to Ichiro." She released her hold, but continued burning holes in him with her stare.  
  
"I'd be more than happy to go out with you," Gosunkugi informed Ingrid.   
  
"I think I am to be liking this country very much," she said in obvious delight...  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"...and so, the moral of the story is, don't mistake coincidence for fate. That Ingrid girl showing up and coming onto Gosunkugi and pulling him out of his suicidal depression isn't an indication of true love. It took lots of time spent together, going through hardships and getting to know one another before true love blossomed and they were married." Kachiko finished her story with flourish of her hand.  
  
"And how long did that take?" Nabiki asked.  
  
"Err, the end of the week," Kachiko said as though the words had to be pulled out one at a time. "But it proves nothing, I tell you. Absolutely nothing! It was luck!"  
  
Ranma said, "What about the panda?"  
  
"What panda?" Kachiko asked.   
  
"The one that the story was supposed to be about. You remember." In a higher voice that was eerily similar to Kachiko's he said, "'Yes, pandas are incredibly dangerous. I can vouch for this from personal experience. Let me tell you a time last month'-"  
  
"Right! Pandas! I was just getting to that part. I was just pausing the story and catching my breath," Kachiko insisted, convincing only Kasumi, who continued listening raptly.   
  
Kachiko began again, "Anyway, the panda incident happened right after Ingrid showed up..."  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Effendi, I have found something," one of the foreign laborers shouted to Gosunkugi.  
  
The group of students walked over to the pit where the laborer had been digging. From the bottom of the neck high pit, the man held up a pale green metal box. It was plain in appearance, save for the series of spirit wards taped across where the lid and sealing it shut. The laborer reached up and handed his discovery to the nearest person: Kachiko.  
  
"There seems to be an inscription on the lid." Kachiko traced the intricate lines of the engraving with her finger.  
  
Ichiro's head darted up and he looked towards the school gates. "Did you guys hear something?"  
  
Everyone else's attention was riveted to the box. Gosunkugi peered over Kachiko's shoulder and deciphered the ancient symbols. "It says, 'Whosoever dares to release the insanely powerful, immortal Arch-Demon, Pandamonious will have their bodies and souls ripped to shreds in an eternal hell of torment and suffering'."  
  
"It sounds like thunder." Ichiro looked fearful now.  
  
"What do you suppose that could mean?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"The sounds are getting louder and coming closer together."  
  
"It means don't open the box or something terrible will happen to you when you release the demon that's being held inside," Sakura snapped.  
  
"It's definitely drawing near."  
  
Kachiko scoffed. "Nah. These ancient guys never came out and said stuff. They always left things in vague curses so that if anything bad happened to you you'd blame it on a curse instead of just plain bad luck."  
  
"I'll be fleeing... I mean heading to class now. Bye-bye."  
  
"That's not vague; it's very specific about what's going to happen if you open the box," Sakura insisted.   
  
Ichiro ceased whining about the now incredibly loud sounds because he was already gone.  
  
Kachiko smirked confidently. "Which means the real curse is buried somewhere in the phrasing so that you don't realize it's there. It's camouflage. I'm telling you."  
  
Before Sakura could launch into a proper retort, the source of the loud booms finally made its presence known as the school gates were ripped from their fittings in the wall and hurled far away. "Kachiko Tendou, the day of your doom has finally arrived!"  
  
Everyone looked away from the box.   
  
"Oh, hey, Wakaba! What's shaking?" Kachiko gave a casual wave of her hand.  
  
"Your doom, stupid! Pay attention when I proclaim the day of your reckoning!" The girl shouted.   
  
"Who is this?" Ingrid asked of the basically average looking girl in a school uniform that was bellowing at Kachiko.  
  
Sakura explained, "A deranged psychotic determined to kill and humiliate, probably in that order, Kachiko, whom she considers her eternal nemesis since the day they were born. Oh yes, she'll also be our classmate."  
  
Kachiko waved dismissively at Sakura and said to Ingrid, "Pay her no mind. Sakura always takes things way too seriously. That's just Wacky Wakaba. She's harmless. She's a buddy of mine that likes pulling pranks."  
  
"And she is always to be coming to school riding the back of pandas of colossal proportions?"   
  
"No, that's a new one," Kachiko admitted as she saw that her longtime friend was indeed perched on the back of a titanic sized panda. The creature had to be fifteen feet long and weighed close to six tons. Massive muscles lined its bulky form, and unnaturally long claws were extended from its paws, digging deep into the ground and razing earth and stone alike.   
  
Kachiko shouted, "Hey, Wakaba! Where'd you get that big-ass panda?"   
  
Posturing proudly, Wakaba declared, "I had my insane, genius uncle create him using genetic reengineering to produce the ultimate killing machine. It possesses not only the awesome strength of a bear, but the claws of a hunting cat, the reflexes of a mongoose, and the viciousness of a wolverine. It will be your downfall, Kachiko Tendou! WAHAHAHA!"  
  
"The disturbed laugh means it's time to go," Sakura informed Ingrid as she led the new student away by the hand. Gosunkugi and the foreign laborers evacuated the area as well, content to allow Kachiko to handle matters.  
  
"So you want me to test out how tough your little bio-weapon is, huh? Good thinking. I'll put it through its paces!" Kachiko boasted haughtily.  
  
"I don't want you to test anything! I want you to die!" Wakaba shouted an order to the mammoth panda to attack.  
  
The beast moved with a speed that belied its form and closed the distance between itself and the target in the span of less than a heartbeat.. It brought one giant claw downward in an arc towards Kachiko. She danced backward, the claw only glancing off the box still in her hands.   
  
And by merest chance, shearing off the spirit wards sealing it.  
  
The lid flew open and a vortex of spectral energies poured forth from the opening. It spouted upward like a geyser, dancing in the air for a moment, before shifting from shooting upward to arcing left, like a snake made of light. The energy streamed forward and struck the panda full in the face. Rather than cascading off it, or driving the beast back, the energy instead seemed to enter the animal itself.  
  
Within a handful of moments the entire fountain of energy had found a home in the panda. Upon closer inspection, Kachiko could see the eyes of the beast had now taken on an unearthly golden hue, and the pupils had become vertical slits filled with malice and hate.   
  
"Attack her!" Wakaba insisted.   
  
The animal turned its head in a one hundred and eighty degree circle, as though its neck was mounted on a swivel. It turned that baleful glare fully upon the girl that was perched on his back. In a voice that made the very air itself shake, it bellowed, "NONE MAY COMMAND THE ELDER DEMON OF PANDAS, THE ALL MIGHTY PANDAMONIOUS, SAVE FOR THE GREATEST LORD OF HATE HIMSELF!"  
  
"It says 'Arch-Demon', not 'Elder Demon' on the box," Kachiko pointed out.  
  
The great beast reared up on its hind legs, nearly throwing off its rider, and roared, "THOSE IDIOTS! NOT ONLY DO THEY HAVE THE AUDACITY TO IMPRISON ME, BUT THEY GOT MY RANK WRONG AS WELL! I'D MAKE THEM PAY, IF THEY WEREN'T ALREADY DEAD!"  
  
Unperturbed by the change in her animal, and holding onto its fur for dear life, Wakaba ordered, "I care nothing for your rank! I order you to dispatch the hateful little bitch post haste!"  
  
The panda focused its evil stare upon Kachiko. "OF COURSE I INTEND TO KILL HER!" The head swiveled back to Wakaba. "HOWEVER, I THINK I'LL DISPATCH YOU FIRST!   
  
It swatted Wakaba off its back as casually as a horse swatting a fly with its tail. The force of the blow sent her body sailing through the air until it impacted with the wall of the school somewhere around the second story. As her flattened form slowly slid back to the ground, she quietly murmured, "Damn you... Tendou. This is all... your fault," before sliding the rest of the way to unconsciousness.   
  
Kachiko's demeanor suddenly became more serious. "You bastard! You hurt my buddy Wakaba! She never did anything to anybody! But now you've gone too far, and you're going to pay!"  
  
Cracking her knuckles in dramatic fashion, Kachiko launched a powerful kick at the beast even as it reared one powerful paw back, intent on slicing the...  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
...Beautiful and vivacious girl in half. It was a tremendous battle that lasted well past third period. It raged across the width and breadth of Tokyo. Singers sang the tale of the conflict between the force from Hell as it strove against the flesh and sinew of mortal woman. The battle encompassed such a tremendous scope that it is legendary even to this day."  
  
"I never heard of it," Ranma pointed out.  
  
"Me neither," Akane said.   
  
"Perhaps you're misremembering something," Kasumi offered.   
  
"No! I did fight the creature, and it was a tremendous battle. It was incredibly dangerous. I'd say that it's worst weapon was definitely its breath."  
  
"It could breathe fire?" Ranma asked.   
  
"No, it was just really, really bad. Smelled like a bunch of rotting feces or something. But I tricked it into a water tower filled with mouthwash to neutralize the odor. I was really on top of my game that day."  
  
Nabiki said, "Since you're alive I assume you won. What happened to the demon?"  
  
Kachiko gave her 'demented hyena' smile. "We drove it out of the body it was possessing by using a spirit ward and locked it up again. I took possession of the prison box and hid it in a safe place that no one would ever discover in a million years."  
  
Nabiki pondered that. "Let me guess. You buried it under a rock in our backyard."  
  
Kachiko's jaw dropped until it was almost low enough to hit the ground. "How did you know?" she gasped.  
  
One of the large rocks in the yard exploded in spectacular fashion, sending shards of granite shrapnel all around. From the smoky ruins left behind, a formerly beaten and buried panda emerged. The eyes of the beast had taken on an unearthly golden hue, and the pupils had become vertical slits fill of malice and hate. "FREE AT LAST!"  
  
"This is not my fault!" Kachiko blurted out.  
  
"Of course it's your fault! You threw a panda right into the spot where the you buried the panda demon!" Akane shouted.   
  
"That happened over twenty years ago! You can't expect me to remember the exact location of every single demon I've sealed away and buried over the last twenty years."  
  
"It was only a couple of months ago to you," Nabiki pointed out.  
  
"Stop quibbling over minor details!" Kachiko snapped.  
  
The panda stalked menacingly out of the hole. Kasumi found herself the first one in its intended path of destruction.  
  
She looked up at the beast and said, "Why, Mr. Saotome, you're wearing tinted contact lenses."  
  
"I AM NOT! THESE ARE MY NORMAL EYES, AT LEAST WHEN I AM POSSESSING A PANDA!"  
  
Kasumi gained a thoughtful gleam to her eye. "Have you ever considered green ones instead? I think they would make you look very attractive."  
  
"FOOLISH MORTAL, YOU DARE TO IMPLY THAT MY APPEARANCE... SAY, I WOULD LOOK BETTER WITH GREEN EYES, WOULDN'T I?!"  
  
"I think so," Kasumi said.  
  
Ranma gathered around with Akane and Kachiko. "Quick, while Kasumi's distracting it with inane banter, how do we get that thing out of Pop?"  
  
Kachiko wrung her hands in worry. "We used a spirit ward to drive it out of Wakaba's pet, but that won't do us any good. Where can we find a ward at this time of day? The situation's hopeless, I tell you! Hopeless!"  
  
Sighing, Akane removed the piece of paper between Kachiko's eyes and walked over to where the Pandamonious was deeply embroiled in conversation with Kasumi.  
  
"PROFESSIONAL GROOMERS, YOU SAY?  
  
"They can do wonders for your hair. I've discussed it with Mr. Saotome sometimes, but he thinks it's too feminine. He doesn't like it when men act feminine. I think it has something to do with his wife."  
  
"I DISAGREE. THERE'S NO REASON ONE CAN'T LOOK GOOD WHILE ENGAGING IN ACTS OF MASSIVE SLAUGHTER AND RAMPANT DESTRUCTION. AND IT IS NOT FEMININE."  
  
Akane kept the spirit ward hidden behind her, and tapped Pandamonious on the back.   
  
The demon swiveled its head around, face full of hatred directed at the one who dared interrupt its schemes concerning the destruction of the human race, as well as improving his style. "WHAT DO YOU WANT?!"  
  
Clearing her throat, Akane said, "I wanted to know what your first step is in taking over the planet."  
  
"OH, WELL THAT'S EASY. FIRST I EXTERMINATE HUMANITY. THEN-"  
  
"Excuse me, I have a hearing problem. Could you bend down closer?"  
  
Openly delighted in someone exhibiting a desire to know his plans for Armageddon, Pandamonious leaned closer. "I SAID-"  
  
Akane attached the spirit ward to its head.  
  
The demon stared at the sheet of paper dangling from its brow. "OH CRAP! NOT AGAINNNnnnn!"  
  
The demon found itself forced out of the body of its host and into the box it had been trapped in for all but three hours and three minutes of its last thousand years of existence. Akane quickly relocated the seal from Genma's brow to the closed box.   
  
Everyone gathered around the box.   
  
"What do we do with it now?" Ranma asked.  
  
"I know, I know." Kachiko jumped up and down excitedly. "We'll take it somewhere so desolate that no one will ever find it."  
  
"Like where?" Akane asked.  
  
"How about the interior of China?"  
  
Nabiki rolled her eyes. "Oh, it'll never find a panda to possess there."  
  
Ranma said, "We'll drop it off with the Old Ghoul. She'll know the best way to either get rid of it or seal it away forever."  
  
Akane went inside the house to store the box in a safe place until they had a chance to give it to Cologne.  
  
"Is there anything else buried in the yard we should know about?" Ranma asked Kachiko.  
  
"No. Well, there's the remains of a vampire buried under the back porch. But you don't have to worry about that, just so long as you don't remove the stake from its rib cage. That's the only thing keeping it from regenerating and, you know, going on a bloodsucking rampage."  
  
Genma, who had finally recovered, held up a sign. *Being possessed made me hungry. Let's eat.*  
  
Ranma's stomach growled in approval. "Good idea."  
  
*And then we can exterminate humanity.*  
  
Everyone looked skeptically at Genma.  
  
He blushed. *Oops. Looks like there was some residual thoughts left over from being possessed.*  
  
The talk of eating stirred Kasumi from her reverie. "Oh dear. I was so wrapped up in mother's tale that I forgot to prepare breakfast. I'll get right on it."  
  
"I want to do some things inside first anyway," Kachiko said, fingering her dirty clothing. She hadn't bathed in over a day or changed her clothing, and something had to be done about that. She entered the house as well.  
  
*Looks like we've got time to finish our training after all.* Genma signed, and proceeded to take a swipe at Ranma.   
  
Ranma darted out of the way. "You're a real wimp, Pop, if you can get possessed by a demon so easily."  
  
*You'll pay for that one, boy. I won't include you on my schemes for world domination,* Genma signed and went after Ranma again.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
It was fifteen minutes later that a sweaty Ranma, now in her cursed form, made her way to the bathroom. Her father had given her a real tussle for a change. He seemed faster and stronger than before, which made Ranma wonder if being possessed by the demon had given the old man an extra boost of energy. If so, it would make the morning workouts more interesting then they had been for a while.  
  
Checking for an occupied sign and seeing none, Ranma began undoing the buttons of her shirt as she opened the door to the bath. She was having trouble with the top one, and had her attention focused on it as she entered the bath and closed the door behind her. She took two steps in and finished undoing the annoying button, when she finally looked up.  
  
In the middle of the room there was a completely naked Kachiko Tendou, sitting on a stool, completely naked and in the process of cleaning her completely naked body off with a bucket of water. She had lathered some soap on her form. Ranma would have liked to have said the bubbles covered up the normally hidden parts, but that would have been too easy. Instead, all of the most interesting parts of her body were quite free of everything save a sheen of water that only served to display all of the girl's attributes in an even more erotic manner. And except for the hips, Ranma could positively certify that Kachiko was built a lot like Akane.  
  
"Ack!" Ranma gasped, and slapped a hand across her eyes. It wasn't going to save her, but at least she wouldn't have to see the blow coming.  
  
Instead of the expected attack, she heard Kachiko say, "Who the hell are you?"   
  
"I'm sorry," Ranma blurted out. One of these days apologizing was going to work and make everything better. It wasn't going to happen today, of course, but someday.  
  
"Great. Another daughter no one thought to tell me about," Kachiko said in a tired voice, "Well, get in here and help me wash my back."  
  
In Ranma's mind, the offer was translated into, "Well, get in here and enjoy certain death at everyone's hands if you even consider for a moment doing what I suggest."  
  
"Can't! I need to leave!" Ranma blurted out and blindly fumbled for the door behind her.  
  
Kachiko let out a snort of derision. Drawing her arm back, she slid the bar of soap she had been using across the floor. Ranma's foot came down on it just as her fingers caressed the door handle. She slipped on the soap, and managed to somersault in the air, landing hard on her back  
  
Lying still for a moment and intent on catching her breath, Ranma took a moment before opening her eyes and immediately wishing she hadn't.   
  
Kachiko Tendou had elected to stand directly over Ranma's fallen form, one leg on each side of her prone body and providing the redhead with a perfect view she most certainly did not want to have.   
  
Keeping her eyes closed, Ranma spun onto her stomach and tried crawling away. "I really need to get out of here!"   
  
Her crawling didn't last long, as she found her forward motion arrested by a hand firmly grasping her by her pig-tail.   
  
"That's enough of that," Kachiko warned. "I told you to wash my back."  
  
"Noooo!" Ranma wailed as she tried to scramble away, but the hold on her pig-tail was too firm, and the strength behind it impressive as she found herself dragged further into the bath.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane came back from securing the box in a place that was relatively safe in her room. None of the family would mess with it, and she had made certain there were no panties or bras around to draw Happosai near the dangerous object. After breakfast she and Ranma would drop the box off with Cologne and maybe ask the old woman if she had any experience with wishing. Akane was especially concerned with the possible repercussions of a young Kachiko Tendou's appearance in the present. No negative side effects had happened yet, and maybe none would, other than the fact the young girl was not what Akane had intended when she wished to have her mother alive and at her side. Honestly, this girl bore no resemblance to any of the memories Akane, or even Kasumi had of the woman that had raised them. This Kachiko was a total stranger that only had the same name as the woman who brought the Tendou girls into this world, and it was incredibly distressing. Akane had come so close to one of her heart's greatest desires, but seeing the version of her mother that resided in her memories seemed impossibly far away.  
  
Lost in deep thought, Akane was passing by the bathroom door and almost missed the voice from within crying out, "Noooo, stop! Stop it, please!"  
  
Akane cringed. Not again. Ranma could not possibly have been stupid enough to make the exact same blundering mistake twice in his life. There was a perfectly rational explanation for his wailing. And she was going to discover it as she forced herself to open the door to the bath. It took a moment to steady the trembling in her hand enough to grip the handle and slide the door open.  
  
The sounds were louder, but Akane couldn't see anything. It took another moment for her to realize that she had closed her eyes. She forced them open, taking in a deep breath of air that was reflexive rather than intentional. Her body was operating on automatic with the familiar scenario, even if her hopes lay in other directions.  
  
And then she saw it. The scene was even worse than she had expected. Ranma was pinned up with her front against the wall by a naked Kachiko Tendou, who was rubbing her back up and down against Ranma's own. The muscles of Kachiko's legs were tensed as they were firmly braced against the floor, effectively pinning Ranma. The smaller girl was pressed so firmly into the wall that she couldn't gain any significant leverage with which to push off, or do anything other than wiggle like a worm skewered on the end of a hook.   
  
The deep breath served its purpose by allowing Akane to shout really loudly, "Ranma! What are you doing with my mother?!"  
  
Ranma cried out, "Help, Akane! She's trying to use me like a giant washcloth!"  
  
Kachiko stopped moving up and down, and looked to Akane. "Let me tell you something. This one is definitely the most ungrateful of the lot of you. She won't even help wash her mother's back."  
  
Akane growled, "Mom, that's not one of your daughters. That's Ranma. And why is he in here when you're naked?"  
  
Kachiko gave her youngest daughter a skeptical expression. Sighing, she said, "Akane, in case you didn't notice, Ranma is a boy, a very nice looking one, and this is a girl. There are significant differences between the two sexes. Now, as your mother, allow me to give you a demonstration highlighting the differences between men and women."  
  
Lightning fast she switched from keeping Ranma pinned against the wall to letting her go. The unexpected release of tension caught Ranma off guard, which enabled Kachiko to grab the redhead by the body and spin her around so that she was facing Akane. All the while Kachiko kept a firm grip on Ranma from behind.   
  
Kachiko clutched Ranma's breasts and squeezed firmly, but not painfully. To Akane, she said, "You'll note these raised areas on the chest are not deformed pectoral muscles, but breasts."  
  
"Ah, don't do that," Ranma moaned, Kachiko's fingertips grasping her at just the right spot to produce just the wrong reaction.  
  
"Very responsive breasts," Kachiko confirmed, and squeezed again.  
  
The scene had now become so horrible that all Akane could do was stand there and gurgle incoherently as the veins began popping up one at a time across her forehead.   
  
Ranma tried running forward. She escaped the clutch around her front, but Kachiko's leg thrust itself between the redhead's, causing her to fall into her stomach. Before she could even try to get back up, Kachiko was keeping her prone on the floor by straddling the backs of her hamstrings.   
  
Kachiko said, "Now, let's go for lower anatomical differences."  
  
"Noooo!" Ranma squirmed as hard as she could to evade the pair of hands that deftly began to undo the drawstring of her pants.  
  
Akane managed to make it to the pointing stage when Nabiki poked her head into the room.  
  
The middle Tendou daughter took the scene in and gave a sad shake of her head. "My, Ranma. This has got to be a record for you. In under an hour you have my mother naked on top of you and trying to strip you right in front of Akane."  
  
Kachiko had gotten as far as the boxers before she stopped and scowled at Nabiki. "Why does everyone insist on calling this girl Ranma?"   
  
"Because it is Ranma, Mother." Nabiki moved past her near catatonic sister and into the bath. "Ranma and his father visited a cursed spring in China and came away, at no charge, with a couple of ancient curses. Cold water turns Mr. Saotome into the panda you saw earlier. It also turns Ranma into the redhead you have pinned under your nude body. Hot water reverses the effect and turns them back into their original forms."  
  
"That's impossible," Kachiko scoffed.   
  
Nabiki raised in eyebrow at that. "You can accept magical wishes, time travel, and Panda Demons, but the idea of someone changing their physical form because of a magic curse is impossible for you to accept?"  
  
Kachiko shrugged. "You have to draw the line somewhere."  
  
"I'm really Ranma," the redhead stated firmly.   
  
Kachiko rose up off Ranma. The redhead breathed a sigh of relief and started to go for her pants.   
  
Kachiko took the opportunity to grab Ranma by the seat of her boxers, lift her off the ground, and toss the redhead into the furo full of warm water she had run earlier. Ranma had only one chance to cry out before splashing into the water, changing as his head slammed into the bottom of the tub. He floated, stunned to the surface of the tub.  
  
Kachiko went to the furo and pulled back the now black head of hair. She peered closely into Ranma's glazed over eyes. "Yep, same semi-vacant stare as before. That's Ranma, all right." She pondered the situation. "Hmm. On one hand, he did get a free show and saw me naked. I had no intention of doing so at this time. I don't just flash anyone a look at the goods." She plunged his head deep into the water and held it there.   
  
That snapped Akane out of his stupor. "Hey, he'll drown if you do that."  
  
"Yes, that's what happens when you hold a person's head underwater and they don't have gills. He doesn't have gills, does he?"  
  
"None that we're aware of," Nabiki said.  
  
Kachiko continued keeping the weakly struggling Ranma underwater. "On the other hand, I inadvertently offered him a free grope, and he refused. He even covered his eyes rather than look at me." She raised his waterlogged head out of the water.   
  
Ranma gurgled out a steady stream of water out, just like a fountain.  
  
Kachiko continued pondering things. "But by refusing to touch me, he insulted me by implying my body wasn't worth touching." She plunged his head back in the water.   
  
Akane wanted to protest, but what her mother was saying made sense.   
  
"Is he gay?" Kachiko asked, pulling his head out of the water again.  
  
Nabiki said, "I've considered it a possibility for a while now. Repressed homosexuality, rather than overt."  
  
"Ranma is not gay," Akane insisted.  
  
Kachiko put the head back in the water. "I'm at something of an impasse here. On some levels he clearly needs to be punished, on others I don't think so. He's making things a bit confusing."  
  
"I know some people that might agree with you there," Nabiki said pointedly to Akane.  
  
Kachiko raised Ranma's head out of the water again. Seeing he was unconscious, she made sure he was still breathing properly. Suddenly the perfect resolution to the matter came to her. "I've got it! I know how to even things up."  
  
"How?" Akane asked.  
  
"Since he saw me naked, I should therefore get to see him naked too."  
  
"I'll get the camera." Nabiki quickly left the room.  
  
"You can't strip Ranma," Akane insisted as her mother slung Ranma's body over the side of the tub and proceeded to remove his shirt.  
  
"Sure I can. He's unconscious. That's the best time to do it since he can't protest or escape," she said slyly.   
  
"I'm telling you it's wrong." Akane grabbed the boxers her mother was trying to remove from Ranma's bottom.  
  
"He's seen my packaging, now I get to see his. Fair is fair." Kachiko tried pulling harder.   
  
"You can't strip unconscious men. It's perverted." Akane kept trying to pull the boxers up while Kachiko pulled down.  
  
"Only if you get caught," Kachiko began to really tug. "Aren't you at least a little bit curious?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Ah ha! You've already seen him naked."  
  
Akane stopped pulling for a moment. "It was an accident."  
  
"We'll call this a convenient accident as well."  
  
"No!"  
  
Both girls gave a mighty tug. The material, as durable as it was, finally gave way with a tearing of threads, and both girls went sprawling backward.   
  
It was also at that moment Nabiki entered the bathroom and snapped a picture.   
  
Everyone looked at the unconscious Ranma, slumped in a sitting position next to the bath.  
  
Nabiki shot the unconscious youth a disdainful look. "Bah. Why did I even bother?" she pulled the back out of the camera and exposed the film.  
  
Kachiko stared at the scene as well. "Hmm. Not much to write home about."  
  
Horrified at the results of the tug of war, Akane grabbed a towel to cover Ranma's privates, but sneaked a second glance. "It isn't?" she asked.  
  
That made Kachiko tear her eyes away from the object in question. "Can't you tell?"  
  
"It's not like I have anything to compare it to." She blushed slightly.  
  
"What, no expeditions to sneak into the men's locker room after a baseball game to check out the 'field equipment'?"  
  
"Of course not! That would be perverted."  
  
"No, no, no. That's not perverted. It's just showing a healthy interest in members of the opposite sex. There's a world of difference between that and perversion. We'll have to make a day of it and hit a locker room and I'll show you what I mean."  
  
"Not a chance. I'm not peeper. And don't pick on Ranma just because he's not, err... big."  
  
Kachiko held her hands up defensively. "I didn't say I was going to do that. Believe me, I know there's more to a person than the size of their equipment. Case in point." Kachiko fondled her breasts, which, while not unnoticeable, would not be mistaken for a pair of watermelons either.  
  
Akane shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah. I'm the same way. I mean, they aren't bad, but, well, let's say there are several other girls I know that are built a bit bigger than me and it makes me feel, well, you know."  
  
"Uncomfortable. I know what you mean. We're a lot alike." She took Akane aside. "You want to know something? I didn't want to say it out loud, but your sisters must have gotten their racks from your dad's side of the family, because they sure didn't get it from mine." Kachiko grabbed a bathrobe and put it on. "That reminds me, I don't have any extra clothing, so I'm going to borrow some of yours."  
  
"Sure. I can loan you some of mine, since we're about the same size." Akane was in somewhat better spirits. It was almost as though she and her mother were bonding, which made her feel very odd. She was silent as she considered the matter.  
  
Akane and her mother exited the room, leaving a naked Ranma lying next to the tub. Silence reigned for only a few moments as Ranma woke with a start, shouting out, "I didn't see anything, especially that distinctive mole on the inside of your..." he trailed off as he realized he had been dreaming. The last thing he remembered was... too much of what had actually happened before unconsciousness had blissfully taken matters into its own hands. Looking around, he assessed his current situation.   
  
He was lying naked next to the furo. His underwear was torn to shreds. His head hurt. It felt like someone had drowned, then resuscitated him.   
  
"Heh, sure got away with one that time." Ranma smirked as he eased himself into the still tepid waters of the tub. He rested his head back against the side and put a hand towel over his eyes so he could relax and enjoy his warm soak.  
  
Then the sounds from the interior of the house began penetrating his shroud of peace.  
  
"Ow! I'm telling you, I am not possessed by a demon. And I swear if you hit me in the head with that hammer again, I'll literally nail your hide to the wall!"  
  
Ranma let out a tired sigh and wondered if it would be best to ask Pop if wanted to go on a little 'training journey' for a while. Like another ten years. Perhaps things would have settled down by then.   
  
"WAAAAH! Kachi-chan! You've come back to me!"  
  
"Ah! Not him again!" *WHAM* "Oh, gross! He got blood on me this time!"  
  
No, that was being optimistic. Maybe fifteen would do. Or maybe his descendants would wish him into the future at a young age so he wouldn't have to deal with any of this. Now there was an idea. He'd have to remember to hammer that concept into his children's heads at an early age, the way his father had insisted on martial arts being a way of life when Ranma himself was but a boy...  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
  
Here ends the latest chapter. And I do believe something of an 'Oops!' was involved. Some ideas came to me as I wrote, so I decided to give a little more of the ah, unique way the world appears through the eyes of Kachiko, as well as getting her 'acclimated' to the climate of the Tendou household twenty years after. Although we did get a few looks at the reactions of a few of the girls, as well as Kachiko's discovery of Ranma's curse. More on this next time.  
  
Special thanks to:  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
The Apprentice  
And Chris Horton for looking this over. 


	4. The Things We Wish For chapter 4

The Things We Wish For...  
Chapter 3  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
There are some end notes which might allay some concerns you might have after reading this chapter.  
  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present, there's only the slight complications that she's there at the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"But I want to hold her in my arms!" Soun pleaded.  
  
"No, Daddy," Nabiki said with more than a hint of iron in her voice.   
  
Kasumi was far more sympathetic as she explained yet again, "While it is true that this is Mother, she doesn't recognize you. This was a version of her plucked out of time before you two met. To her, you're a complete stranger."  
  
"Even worse, she thinks you're a pervert," Akane added.  
  
"But I'm her husband. Surely someone can explain to her that we were happily married for a number of years, and that it's perfectly fine to pick up where we left off."  
  
"If you try that, the odds of us losing a father are pretty high. And we're fresh out of wishes to bring you back," Nabiki evaluated.   
  
"But my dear departed wife is no longer departed! I've missed her so much, and now we're reunited. It's like a dream come true. It's not fair that she's here and doesn't remember our lives together."  
  
Akane laid a sympathetic hand on her father's shoulder. "I know. We all feel the same way. We'll get things sorted out, but it's going to take time. You need to back off. If you keep trying to do what you've been doing, all you're going to do is drive Mom away."  
  
Kasumi gave a small clap to her hands. "I know. All you have to do is act like you're meeting her for the first time again. Behave the same way you did back then, and after a while, nature will take its course and you two will eventually fall in love and get back together. Before you know it, she'll be your wife, as well as our mother. And it'll be especially easy for you to win her heart since you already did it once before. It'll be history repeating itself."  
  
"That's a great idea!" Akane said. "We'll start off with how you two met and go from there."  
  
Soun squirmed uncomfortably. "Our original meeting was arranged at the behest of her parents. My mother was an acquaintance of her mother, and since her parents were looking for someone acceptable for her to marry they thought we should meet. After that meeting, I was deemed suitable by them."  
  
"That might make thing difficult, since Grandma and Grandpa Tendou are dead," Nabiki said.  
  
"Mother doesn't know about that, does she?" Kasumi said.  
  
"Who's going to tell her?" Akane asked.  
  
Four sets of eyes looked one another over.  
  
"Maybe she'll figure it out on her own and we should comfort her then?" Soun suggested.   
  
The three girls agreed.  
  
With the situation somewhat more sober, Soun said, "I'll do as you say, and treat her as I would any respected visitor to our home."  
  
It was Kasumi's turn to place a sympathetic hand on her father's shoulder. "Don't worry. I'm sure things will work out and Mother will fall in love with you all over again."  
  
"Of course. You're right. With my inherent charm and good looks, I'll be able to woo her in no time, again." Soun pumped his fist triumphantly in the air. "I already know everything about her. Such as her favorite foods, what kinds of flowers she likes, and how she likes it when we were in bed and I'd run my fingers along her-"  
  
"Whoa! Stop! Way too much information," Nabiki declared. "Just remember to take things slowly and let her adjust a bit. Me and the others will help you when the time is right. For the moment, all we're concerned about is damage control and getting her to see you in a non-hostile light. Now, do you agree to the ground rules?"  
  
Soun nodded. "Of course. The last thing in the world I want to do is cause her grief. I'm just so overcome with emotion that she's back." He began to cry in earnest.  
  
The girls waited for their father to pull himself together before leading him back to the living room, where Kachiko was waiting. As they entered, they saw Kachiko waiting, tapping her foot impatiently. Ranma and Genma were also present, standing slightly behind her.  
  
Kachiko pulled up the waistband of her shorts, then placed her hands firmly on her hips, clearly glaring up at Soun as he entered. Akane positioned herself so that she could interject between the two should her father be overcome with emotion and try to embrace his wife again.   
  
Nabiki started to say, "Good news. Daddy agrees not to-"  
  
Kachiko waved her hand at Nabiki, indicating silence. She marched right up to Soun's face and stated, "All right, buddy. Let me make things perfectly clear. As far as I'm concerned, this is my house, same way it was yesterday. Ranma and his father are welcome to stay as long as they want. I'm willing to let the girls stay as well. But the last thing in the world I want inhabiting this house is some dirty old letch. The only reason I'm going to let you stay is because Ranma asked me so nicely."  
  
"I didn't ask you that," Ranma said.  
  
Kachiko considered that. She then grabbed Soun by the shoulders, turned him around, and began pushing him towards the door, shouting, "Out! Out! Out!"   
  
Soun wailed at the top of his lungs, resisting her efforts by grabbing onto the walls and pleading with her to allow him to stay.  
  
"Ranma." Akane prodded him in the ribs and pointed at Kachiko.  
  
Ranma sighed and said to the time-lost girl. "I would consider it a favor if you'd let Mr. Tendou stick around."  
  
Kachiko stopped trying to push Soun out. "What are you going to give me in return?"  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Ranma asked.  
  
"You said you'd consider it a favor to let him stay. Well, I want a favor in return."  
  
"No way. Favors lead to nothing but trouble."  
  
"Out! Out! Out!" Kachiko shouted and returned to shifted so she was trying to drag Soun out instead of pushing him.  
  
Akane prodded Ranma in the ribs again.  
  
"Sure, I'll do you a favor," Ranma sighed.   
  
"Done." Kachiko released her hold on Soun. "Now for the rest of the rules concerning my house. I'm taking my room back, so that means Akane has to sleep somewhere else, except Ranma's room, which is off limits to everyone but Ranma and his father. And that goes for the old perv too, since he might try to hit on Ranma's cursed form."  
  
"Hey! Why do I have to move?!" Akane shouted.  
  
"You make for a lumpy rug. I might trip on you when I have to get up," Kachiko explained.  
  
"Oh, well we wouldn't want to inconvenience you or anything," Akane grumbled.   
  
"You can stay with me for now, until Mother finds someone's else bed to sleep in." Kasumi smiled and gave a knowing shake of her head towards her father.   
  
"Comments like that are how you end up with a foot driven up your flabby backside," Kachiko said in a flat voice to her oldest 'daughter'.  
  
The statement had a somewhat more severe impact on Kasumi than in the old days when, if she misbehaved, her mother would threaten to spank her. Though it served the same purpose as Kasumi chose to remain silent.  
  
It was at this point Nabiki decided she had enough. "I hate to break this to you, 'Mother,' but there is the little matter of you being declared dead for over a decade, which wouldn't be a concern, except you WERE dead. Whereas you might regard this house as yours, and it might very well have been at one time, I'm afraid that legally it belongs to Daddy." Nabiki smirked.  
  
Kachiko cocked her head quizzically, seemed to consider something, then said, "Why thank you for pointing that out. I hadn't thought of it in those terms. I'm glad you cleared things up."  
  
"No problem," Nabiki said.  
  
"Now go to your room."  
  
"What?"  
  
Kachiko pointed upstairs. "You heard me, Daughter. Go up to your room right now for being mouthy to your mother."  
  
"Don't be ridiculous. I am not going to my room because you say so." Nabiki remained in the exact spot she stood, crossing her arms adamantly.  
  
Rather than press the point with the girl, Kachiko turned to the man next to her. Her eyes were full of tears as she sniffled and said, "Soun-chan, our daughter's being defiant. I go away for a couple of years, and this is how you let our children's behavior deteriorate, showing no respect for the people that brought them forth into this world. I'm so ashamed." She cupped her hands to her face, hiding it from view as the sounds of crying filled the room.  
  
A transformation seemed to overcome Soun as, for the first time in years, his backbone stiffened and his resolve firmed. "You're absolutely right, Kachi-chan. I've been a poor father. Nabiki, go to your room."  
  
Nabiki's eyes were wide as she barely was able to associate the man before her with what she knew him to be. "Daddy?"  
  
"You heard what both of your parents said. Go now, or you'll be punished even more severely."  
  
It took a moment for the full impact of what just happened to set in for Nabiki. Eyebrow twitching at being so easily forced from the field of play, she stomped up to her room.  
  
Once Nabiki was out of sight, and the sound of a door slamming reached everyone's ears, Soun turned to his sobbing wife, whose face remained buried in her hands. "Forgive me, dearest. I'm afraid without you, I've been something of a shell of the man I once was." He moved to embrace her. "But with you at my si-"  
  
A swift uppercut prevented him from making contact.  
  
Eyes quite devoid of any sorrow, Kachiko tugged up her shorts and said, "Now that the wise ass has been taken care of, I hope things are made perfectly clear here. I'm in charge from now on. If I say 'jump', You say 'one leg or two'." She immediately began laughing hard enough that true tears filled her eyes.  
  
Everyone just stared.   
  
Seeing no one else laughing, she wiped the tears away "That was a joke. You know, instead of 'how high,' 'One leg or two'?"  
  
Somberly, Soun said, "Yes, you're definitely Kachi-chan, all right. No one had a sense of humor like you. Thankfully."  
  
"I don't remember it being that bad," Kasumi said.  
  
"You probably blocked out the memories. That happens with traumatic experiences, especially when you're young," Soun explained to her.  
  
"Hey, I got a great sense of humor!" Kachiko pleaded her case, but no one cared to hear it as they left the room en masse.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Twenty years later, and still no one knows a good joke when it comes up and bites them in their rear." Kachiko grumbled as she turned to an environment more familiar to her senses. The house might have been physically the same, at least as far as the structure was concerned, but it unquestionably had a different feel than when she had lived there alone with her parents. It was cozy, for lack of a better term. The Tendou home had been many things in Kachiko's life, but cozy was not one of them.  
  
But the same could not be said for the place she entered. The dojo. This was where her heart lay. In many ways it was more of a home than the place she ate and slept ever was. Here, within these four walls, she was in surroundings that allowed her to thrive and flourish. Here it was ability, not gender or societal expectations, that ruled. Speed, endurance, skill, wits, power, these were the tender that was bartered about in the world of martial arts. Time could change many things, from places to people, but it could not distort that basic truth. The fight was eternal, and would always remain so even if she was hurled a thousand years into the past or future.  
  
Kachiko carefully examined the interior of the place that even now, made her feel more secure. She could see some of the walls had been patched and a section of the roof replaced, but those were cosmetic changes. The feel was still the same. She breathed in the air deeply. The smell of blood, sweat, and muscles exerting themselves to the fullest still permeated the wood. It was the same in the ways that mattered. Time would not take this all-important place from her; she would not allow it.  
  
Joints creaked and muscles strained as Kachiko began to stretch out and prepare for practice. The routine was automatic, so she allowed her mind to wander. There was a time when even a basic work out would have excited her, early on. Her rotten old father had been reluctant to teach her the Tendou School of Martial Arts. Given the nature of the school, so similar to Kachiko's inherent nature, one would have thought that would make her an ideal student. But her father was fostered in the old ways, and felt it improper for a girl to learn to the art. But even the old man's stubbornness could not fight off reality when it reared its ugly head. Her parents had a great deal of difficulty trying to conceive a child, and Kachiko had been given to them only later in their lives. When it became obvious there would be no male heirs, her father finally acquiesced and taught her the art.   
  
So much time had been wasted, but Kachiko quickly made up for it. She proved almost inhumanly adept at the school and its catalogue of impressive techniques. In no time she rivaled her much older father in skill, and was certain she would have passed him soon, if she had not done so already. Her mind on the battlefield was like a trap, even Sakura, who cared little for martial arts, would admit that. Once in a fight, nothing else existed, save Kachiko and her opponents. In other walks of life she might not be perfect, but in the art, she had no equals. Or at least, none that she had met yet. Oh, there was the occasional setback from time to time. Single defeats hidden within numerous victories. But that just meant it was time to come up with a new battle strategy, and new techniques. Even as masterful in the art as she was, Kachiko knew she would grow complacent given enough peace. Well, peace fighting-wise, rather than peace in her life. But struggles in life did not always equate to struggles in combat. And thanks to Wakaba and others, there was no fear of losing her edge.   
  
The warm ups complete, Kachiko rose to her feet, only to find the need to pull up the bottoms of the gi Akane had loaned her yet again. It was getting ridiculous. The tops all fit fine, but none of the shorts or pants Kachiko had been loaned fit in the slightest. That girl must have had hips wide enough to give birth to a rhino. And Akane's style, while not too bad, was a bit conservative by Kachiko's estimation. She would have to acquire clothing more suited to herself and her personality before too long. She'd ponder how to obtain the clothing after her work out.  
  
Given her highly agitated state with the recent turn of events in her life, Kachiko chose a more advanced routine of fighting that would really make her heart start pumping. She chose one involving a high level of combat she had been forced to use against several armed, and unreasonably violent, opponents. Her mind's eye visualized a combination of several opponents attacking her at once. She shifted quickly from form to form, going from defense to offense in mid-motion, as remembrance of past fights and openings in the opponent's defenses sprang to mind.   
  
Her mind and body were in the middle of a fight with that idiot who claimed he was the reincarnation of Pharaoh Sat-Ona-Tak, or somesuch stupid name, when she sensed the presence of another entering the dojo. Her body tensed up, switching so that she was ready for actual combat, as her mind went through a half dozen attack or flight scenarios, before she turned to determine the identity of the newcomer.  
  
"Oh, hello, Ranma."   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Watching from the sidelines, Ranma gave a half smile towards Kachiko. "Hey there. It looks like you really do know some martial arts."  
  
"Can't kick ass without some talent." She made flexed her arm to show off her lean, but definite, muscle.  
  
Ranma entered the dojo fully. "I didn't recognize some of those moves."  
  
"They're from my family's arts, combined with some things I came up on my own. Unless you've had training in the Tendou School, you wouldn't know it."  
  
"Well, I do know the Tendou School of Anything Goes Martial Arts, and I did recognize some of those moves you used, but not all of them. Some of them looked pretty good."   
  
Kachiko gave a proud smile. "Almost as good as the girl that was using them."  
  
An eager gleam came to Ranma's eye. "How about we spar some and see how good you really are?"  
  
Surprisingly, Kachiko scoffed at the suggestion. "If I want to pretend to punch at something, I can do that alone. It's full contact or nothing."  
  
Ranma hesitated at that. Not that he thought she could hurt him -she was just a girl-but it would look really bad if Kachiko turned up with so much as a scratch and he was to blame. From Akane to Soun, any injury, no matter how slight, would be returned to him a dozenfold. Even Kasumi would probably look cross at him, for roughing up her recently returned parent. And that made him very uneasy. "I don't know."  
  
Kachiko turned and began to go through a kata. "I understand. Most people are wisely afraid of my fighting prowess. There's nothing to be ashamed of."  
  
"Hey! I ain't afraid of nothing! I'll show you! We can... what are you writing there?"  
  
Kachiko continued scribbling in a tiny notebook, murmuring, "Easy... to... goad..." She tucked the notebook inside her gi, and started whistled innocently. "Nothing. Nothing at all. Let's fight. Go ahead and warm up and let me know when you're ready."  
  
Ranma fell into an aggressive stance. "Being a practitioner of the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts means being ready for anything at any time. And besides, I have people come out of nowhere and attack me all the time, and I have to be ready to defend myself right then and there."  
  
"I know the feeling. People are always harassing you and accusing you of stuff you never did, or blaming you for things that aren't your fault. Or maybe they are a tiny bit your fault, but then people just have to go and overreact. It's like, 'I'm sorry I flushed your map to the Emperor's Lost Treasure down the toilet, but I had to go really bad and there was no toilet paper in the stall, and it's not like you would have wanted it after I was through with it anyway, and besides, what could you really do with a half ton of gold'?" Kachiko held her hands out helplessly.  
  
Ranma shook his head. "I know there's a story behind what you just said, but I think I'm better off not knowing it." He shrugged his shoulders and got back to the matter at hand. "Don't worry about anything. I'll go easy on you."  
  
"Thanks. I really appreciate it. I bruise easily."  
  
The disarming cute smile she gave him (unlike her wide hideous one that would have been more appropriate for terrifying small children) stirred Ranma. It reminded him, almost painfully, of the one Akane could give when she was pleased by something. Seeing it on another person made him uncomfortable for reasons he didn't understand.  
  
He shook clear of those thoughts and instead focused on more immediate matters. It was the time for the sparring match. He meant what he had said about going easy on her. He'd move first and try to get close to her rather than actually punching or kicking. Maybe he'd try to trip her and put her on the floor, then use his superior strength to pin her down without harming her. Yes, that seemed the best way.  
  
They stood apart, and bowed before one another. Kachiko was the first to move as she closed the distance between the two in a heartbeat. A bright blue aura surrounded her fist as she drew it back and bellowed, "ROARING THUNDERFIST OF DOOM!"  
  
A chi attack. That was a surprise. Obviously, Kachiko knew what she was doing if she could summon it so easily. Still, Ranma had countered plenty of chi powered blows before, and brought his arm up to deflect the incoming punch, already planning his counterattack.  
  
However, the punch ended when it only closed half of the distance to his face. Kachiko's foot, however, did not stop as it darted forward and planted itself firmly between Ranma's legs.   
  
The blow made Ranma double over in agony, his hands dropping to his groin reflexively. Kachiko took advantage of the lapse in his defense by bringing her hands forward and striking Ranma on both sides of the head right below his ears with a vicious double chop. His eyes rolled into the back of his head and he hit the wooden floor of the dojo with an audible thump.  
  
Kachiko gave a disapproving noise as she looked at the prone figure before her. "Geez, you're gullible. What sort of idiot calls out an attack before she makes it? It's like saying, 'I'm going to punch you in the face. See if you can block it in time'. And I thought you were a tough martial artist." She pulled up her pants yet again. "And I really got to get this problem taken care of." She departed, leaving Ranma lying unconscious on the floor.  
  
xxxxxxxxx  
  
Nabiki was still seething on her bed when a loud knock sounded on her door. "Come in."  
  
Kachiko hesitantly entered, her eyes cast downward before laying their shamed gaze upon Nabiki. That made the middle Tendou daughter sit up as she concentrated on her visitor.   
  
Bowing deeply, Kachiko said, "I profusely apologize for my improper behavior earlier today. It was wrong of me to send you to your room for simply making a point that was a legitimate cause for concern. I'm still disoriented from my time travel and my judgment has been a bit off balance lately. Since you're my daughter and everything, I wish to make amends." She approached Nabiki and held her arms out wide. "Come, give your mother a hug."  
  
Nabiki's features softened, and she rose to embrace Kachiko. The two gave a quick hug, patting each other on the back before breaking apart.  
  
Breaking the embrace, Nabiki said, "Don't worry about anything. I understand now."  
  
Breathing a sigh of relief, Kachiko said, "That's good."  
  
"I understand Akane's bottoms are too big and you came here hoping I'd loan you some of my clothes."  
  
Kachiko made a strangled noise. "I'm that transparent?"  
  
"To one who can see the signs," Nabiki said confidently. "I take it Kasumi's clothing was too big for you?"  
  
"Well, it's not so much that as her selection of clothing was, how shall we say..." Kachiko searched for the right words. "Ah yes, appropriate for someone in her forties that wants to shout, 'I have no life and don't want to take a chance of getting one.' I was afraid some of that frumpiness was going to rub off on me just by looking at them. I don't think that girl owns a thing that shows off anything above the knee."  
  
"Aside from one piece swim suits, probably not," Nabiki admitted.   
  
"So you'll loan me some clothing?"  
  
"Sure." Nabiki watched Kachiko run enthusiastically toward the closest. "And I'll only charge you a hundred yen a day per item."  
  
Kachiko stopped. She looked at Nabiki in shock. "You're going to charge me?"  
  
"I agreed to loan them to you, not give them away."  
  
Sniffling, Kachiko said, "But I'm your mother. The woman who brought you into this world."  
  
"You're the woman that will eventually," Nabiki emphasized the last word, "bring me into this world. Seeing as you haven't done it yet, at least from your perspective, that doesn't give you much hold over me. Still, in the interest of maintaining a good line of communication, since you are going to be living here for a while, I'll go easy on you."  
  
"Thanks." Kachiko went back into the closet.  
  
"Ten percent discount for family."  
  
Grumbling low enough so that the words couldn't be made out, though their meaning was clear, came from within the closest. Still, Kachiko remained within, rummaging around, if making louder noises than necessary.  
  
For a brief moment, a pang of Nabiki's conscience informed her that taking advantage of her mother was probably not the most highly moral of paths. But then again, Kachiko had started things by manipulating events so Nabiki had been summarily dismissed when she was just trying to protect her own. And what Kachiko had started, Nabiki would finish. And after all, wasn't it the dream of every parent that the child should surpass them at some point? Nabiki was just getting a jump on things was all.  
  
In less than fifteen minutes, Kachiko returned with a handful of shorts, pants, and even a short skirt under one arm. It was much less than Nabiki would have thought she needed. "No more?"  
  
"I only need several for now," Kachiko said enigmatically. With her free hand she reached into her back pocket and pulled out an impressive wad of cash.   
  
Nabiki watched hungrily as Kachiko rolled the bills out of the fold, one at a time. That was an impressive amount of money for her mother to carry around, its size comparable to the amount Nabiki usually kept on her person. How Kachiko had accumulated such an amount in her own past time, Nabiki was reluctant to guess, though it did bode well. The more money Kachiko had access to, the more money Nabiki would have access to as well.   
  
Slowly, Kachiko replaced the roll of money in her pocket. "I hope you're happy with yourself."  
  
"I'm happier than I was a moment ago." Nabiki counted the money and placed it within her own pocket, exaggerating everything for her mother's benefit, and reminding her who had come to whom.  
  
Kachiko gave a loud "Humph!" and exited, shutting the down loudly behind her.  
  
That made Nabiki smirk. She had won. That had been a cute little bit of maneuvering on Kachiko's part, getting Daddy to back her against Nabiki -that was something she hadn't thought possible- but, once again Nabiki had asserted herself as the savviest of the people in the area. Kachiko had shown some small promise of being a potential headache, but it had taken a matter of moments to gain the advantage over her. One Nabiki would not be relenting anytime soon.   
  
And the final blow to prove her superiority was that all of the clothing Kachiko had chosen were things Nabiki had borrowed from Akane. Oh well, being set back to square one would be a good lesson for Kachiko in how the pecking order worked around here. Nabiki at the top, and everyone else somewhere below. And that including time-lost parents who thought they were smarter than everyone else.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"So, you thought you could teach Mommy to suck eggs, did you?" Had anyone seen Kachiko's smirk, they would have been struck by the uncanny resemblance between her and Nabiki as she continued counting the money in her hand. Kachiko could tell that Nabiki was hiding a kind heart behind a facade of ice. Had the middle girl's pride allowed her to, she would have been happy to give Kachiko the money she needed to purchase some new clothes. As it was, in order to leave Nabiki's pride intact, Kachiko had helped herself to what resided in Nabiki's pocket during their 'embrace.' It was a mother's job to let her children believe certain things in order to treat them like adults, and in her opinion, this certainly qualified as one of those moment. And if Kachiko came out ahead financially, then it was for all the better.  
  
Akane's information on Nabiki had seemed accurate. Kachiko had certainly known people like Nabiki in her time, and subsequently knew how to deal with them. Of course, Kachiko's 'middle child' would probably try something else and act like the top girl around here, which would mean Kachiko would have to keep on her toes. But then, she was used to friends and family keeping her alert and ready for anything at all times. Kachiko wouldn't have had it any other way. An interesting life was far better than a dull one.  
  
And it was at that moment one of the more 'interesting' things in Kachiko's life chose to reassert itself.   
  
Ranma staggered toward her, one hand covering his groin. He winced out, "I want a rematch. You didn't really win. That was a cheap shot."  
  
Kachiko appeared completely oblivious. "What was?"  
  
"That attack you called out. That was no punch."  
  
"Well, it all depends on your point of view. It was sort of a punch, in an existential sort of way."  
  
"No it wasn't! That was kick, and a dirty one at that."  
  
"If you don't want to risk accidentally taking one in the balls, fight as a girl." Kachiko grabbed a glass of water (that was inexplicably resting on a table) and tossed it at Ranma. Immediately the transformation took place.  
  
"What did you do that for?!"  
  
"Feel any better?" Kachiko asked.  
  
Ranma considered that. "Yeah, actually it doesn't hurt so much. Though now the whole area's a little sore. Still, it's better than before." Ranma poked herself down below.  
  
Kachiko said, "Anyway, it's time for you to pay back that favor. We're going clothes shopping for me, and I need a man's opinion on what I'll look good in."  
  
"I've, uh, got a meeting with a friend of mine to discuss something about bread." Ranma spun around in the opposite direction and began to walk off.   
  
Kachiko stopped Ranma's forward progress by latching on to her pigtail. "Time enough for baking later. A favor's a favor and you're repaying yours now. It's either that or you wash my back again."  
  
"I'll go! I'll go!" Ranma said, turning around so that she was facing the same direction Kachiko was.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko spun around for Ranma's benefit. "So how do I look?"  
  
'Actually you look pretty nice, though not as good as I would look in it', was what the now male Ranma thought, but most assuredly did not say. That answer would have pretty much covered everything. The first part would make everyone but Kachiko angry at him, the second part would then pick up that loose end. Even if it was the truth. Using a combination of basic diplomacy, taught to him by his survival instincts, and dumb luck, he said, "Shouldn't you concentrate on getting tops that go down past your mid-riff and skirts that go past your knees?"  
  
Kachiko scoffed as she fingered the halter top and leather mini-skirt that bordered on micro. The metal belt she wore made her gave a jingling sound as she spun. "Are you kidding? It's great that a girl can walk around in this sort of stuff without getting stared at. Or at least the wrong kind of disapproving stares. Back in my day, which was sort of yesterday, wearing this sort of outfit would have made all the old folks give you a lecture about dressing improperly. Besides, when you got a build like mine, it'd be a crime not to show it off." She sauntered over to Ranma, who was sitting in a chair and being made to watch her as she displayed her outfits for him. She made certain her pelvis was at eye level, and shifted her hips for his benefit. "Wouldn't you agree?"  
  
Ranma looked pointedly away. "I didn't notice, so I can't say."  
  
She grabbed him by the sides of his head and thrust his face into her bare mid-riff. "Can you notice now?"  
  
"Yes. I notice you're an innie," his muffled voice replied  
  
Kachiko turned his head away and released it in disgust. "Honestly, Ranma. You sure do know how to play dumb. If I hadn't kicked you in the nuts before, I'd swear you were an eunuch."  
  
"Yeah, and thanks a lot for that little favor." Ranma squirmed in his seat, his legs moving closer ever so slightly.   
  
"If it still hurts, I can kiss it and make it better." Kachiko puckered up and made kissing noises.  
  
"Don't be perverted." Ranma covered up his privates, despite their already being hidden by his pants. Around Kachiko, one could never have enough cover.  
  
"I was only kidding. You sure can't handle sexual innuendo," she informed him.  
  
"When it comes to that kind of talk around here, it's never just innuendo," Ranma grumbled as Kachiko went back into the dressing room to try on yet another one of the multitude of far too scanty outfits that seemed to have met with her approval. The only upside seemed to be she hadn't hit him up for the money to pay for it all.  
  
As Ranma sat there and pondered the situation, the saleswoman --who had attached herself to them as soon as they entered the store-- appeared as if by magic and once again inquired, "Are you certain I can't interest you in some outfits as well? We have a number of shirts that would match your companion's perfectly."  
  
Ranma resisted the urge to retort, "I am a human being, not a walking commission," and instead said, "I like what I got just fine."  
  
The saleswoman persisted. "But you and your girlfriend make such a lovely couple. You'd look even lovelier if you clothing was coordinated as well."  
  
"She ain't my girlfriend!"  
  
Kachiko's head poked out from between the drawn curtains. "He's right. I only met him yesterday. But he is a hunk and he's already conspired to see me naked, so I'd say things are going along at a pretty fast pace."  
  
"They are not moving fast. They aren't moving at al..." Ranma trailed off. Then he noticed that the curtain below her head was parted a little bit. The opening went downward just low enough that one could clearly see that Kachiko's comment had come at a time when she had removed both her top and bra. There was enough space to allow one to see not just the valley between, but a couple of centimeters of the sides of the breasts as well.  
  
Kachiko noticed his attention had drifted off and followed the path that his eyes had taken. She looked down at herself, then pulled the curtain shut so only her head was showing. "Typical male. Says one thing, does another."  
  
"Too true," the saleswoman agreed.  
  
Ranma, temporarily flummoxed, turned away and grumbled to himself. Not twenty-four hours, and already the new girl was making his life more complicated than it was before. And the whole resemblance to Akane, while not behaving at all like Akane, was only compounding matters.   
  
"I wanna go on a training trip," Ranma said to himself.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Is Designate: MDD I in position?"  
  
"Yes. All systems are ready."  
  
"Then proceed with the plan."  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"And how does this look?"  
  
"Fine."   
  
Kachiko was about to give up. She had dragged Ranma along sincerely wanting a man's opinion on her choice of clothing. But since their brief discussion about her navel, 'Fine' was the only response she could pry out of Ranma each time she asked. Worse, he seemed to mean it each time. What was it about guys that made them so uncritical about clothing? By her estimation, if the matter of clothing had been left up to men, the human race would probably still be running around dressed only in fig leaves.  
  
"Ranma, how do you think I'd look in a fig leaf?"  
  
"Fine."  
  
It had to be genetically hardwired into the male form. Sort of like blinking. It was the only explanation.   
  
Kachiko was about to ask him if he'd like another shot to the nuts, and if he said, 'fine' she'd do it too, when the sound of a loud explosion came from the street.   
  
"Thank god!" Ranma was out of his seat and through the front door in the blink of an eye.  
  
It seemed to Kachiko that she was going to be denied any quality time with the potential target of her affections. "Here," she tossed the saleswoman enough money to cover the outfit she was wearing. It was her experience that whenever there were loud explosions, outfits tended to end up a bit the worse for wear. Better to pay for the clothes in advance and enjoy them intact a little while instead of having to pay top price for damaged goods.  
  
Once Kachiko made it out in the street, she saw the source of the clamor: it was a huge man, standing nearly eight feet tall and weighing close to five hundred pounds. He wore a white gi, and his head was vaguely fish-shaped, with huge eyes, no hair, and bulging lips. He was striding down the street, moving almost mechanically. Behind him, a trail of twisted metal and destroyed storefronts and vehicles indicated the path he had taken.  
  
As Kachiko assessed the situation, the giant man approached a small, abandoned truck, raised his hand, and brought it downward. The chop sundered the tiny vehicle in half as easily as if it were made of paper-mache and he had taken an axe to it.  
  
Ranma did not seem the least bit taken aback. "What does that idiot Dojo Destroyer think he's doing?"  
  
"Dojo Destroyer?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"Yeah. Some dumb big guy that bothered me and Akane a while back. He went around destroying dojos and tried to take the Tendous'. Akane played around with him for a while before I finished him off."  
  
"Doesn't sound like much he was much of a challenge," Kachiko said.  
  
The Dojo Destroyer lived up to the latter part of his name by destroying another vehicle with a single swipe from his hand.  
  
"Well, it does look like he's a bit stronger, but confused. I'll straighten him out." Ranma gave a cocky grin and ran up until he was in front of the Destroyer. "Hey there, you idiot! Those aren't dojos you're destroying. They're just cars and stores. You having problems seeing, or have you decided to expand your skills by wiping out every kind of building now?"  
  
The Dojo Destroyer opened its mouth. A sound similar to a voice synthesizer being tortured emitted from it.  
  
"Was that German? It sounded German to me," Kachiko asked as she moved forward to help Ranma.  
  
"Ah, no. I'm not sure what that was," Ranma admitted. "He used to talk fine."  
  
The Dojo Destroyer bought up his arm and pointed at Ranma. There was a clicking sound, as though something was locking into position. Then dojo signs began shooting out from the confines of the arm of the loose gi.  
  
Ranma and Kachiko darted out of the way before the signs could hit them. Instead the boards hit the street, exploding and shattering the pavement, sending rocky shrapnel everywhere.  
  
The two recovered quickly. "Okay, explosive dojo signs. That's a new one," Ranma admitted.   
  
"This seems familiar, somehow," Kachiko said, and began scratching her head as she tried to remember why.  
  
Almost mechanically, the Dojo Destroyer turned to their new position, and once again spun his arm so that it made another clicking sound. The two separated before the signs could detonate around them.  
  
"You distract him while I go in and take him on up close," Ranma instructed Kachiko.   
  
She wasn't happy with the order, but did as she was told. She made an obscene gesture towards the Destroyer while Ranma ducked behind a mailbox. As Ranma had planned, the big man followed the girl's movement and clicked his arm once again.  
  
As he began firing on Kachiko, Ranma rushed forward. The giant ceased firing as Ranma drew near, but it was too late to evade. Instead Ranma got in under the large man's guard and punched him under his shooting arm, aiming for the ribs.  
  
Instead of the Destroyer wincing in pain, it was Ranma, who looked in shock as his fist 'clanged' against the side of the Destroyer. "Hey, wearing armor is no fair."  
  
The Destroyer raised his hand over his head and brought it down aimed at Ranma's skull. The smaller boy easily moved to the side, allowing the blow to pass by and ruin another section of the street.  
  
"My turn!" Kachiko shouted as she leaped up into the air and aimed for the Destroyer's head. He didn't even try to move as she streaked past, impacting solidly with the top of his cranium.  
  
"Ow!" Kachiko shouted as she bounced off, hurting herself more than the Destroyer. She landed in a crouch, muttering, "This is real familiar."  
  
Ranma maneuvered so he was behind the Destroyer, intent on attacking him in his blind spot before he could recover.   
  
Rather than pivoting his body around to follow the smaller boy, the Destroyer simple swiveled his head around so he was facing Ranma again.   
  
"That's new too," Ranma said uneasily, wondering where the man had tucked his neck bones in order to move it around like that.  
  
The Destroyer's eyes glowed red for an instant, then ruby beams of energy shot out, hitting Ranma squarely in the chest and sending sparks everywhere.   
  
Ranma recoiled in agony form the heat and impact the beams imparted. Though painful, it was not enough to incapacitate him. All he needed was a second to recover. Again the Destroyer's eyes glowed, and Ranma was uncertain if he would get the time he needed.  
  
A loud shout announced Kachiko's approach. The Destroyer gave off another inhuman cry and turned in the direction of this new adversary. Kachiko was faster as she evaded the eyebeams and struck him in the cheek, knocking off a piece of his flesh.  
  
The chunk arced toward Ranma, and he reflexively caught it. Then he realized what it was he had grabbed. "Ewww! That's disgusting. He must have leprosy or..." Ranma felt the material in his hand. "Hey, this isn't flesh. It's come kind of plastic."  
  
"Plastic?" Kachiko said as she returned to Ranma's side.  
  
The Dojo Destroyer remained motionless. A moment later, he was bathed in a blue light that seemed to come from within his robes. It rose up to cover even his hands and head. In a flash of blinding blue energy, all of his clothing and flesh seemed to fly off his body, his form momentarily blocked from view.   
  
When the pair's eyes recovered enough to see what had happened, they both recoiled. Standing before them was a completely silver metal version of the Dojo Destroyer. His eyes were multi-faceted gem-like material. His fingers were tiny missiles, and there was some sort of metal panel on his rounded belly.  
  
The Destroyer opened his mouth and emitted the mechanical sound again.  
  
Kachiko shouted. "Ah! I know what he is. He's some kind of Germinator sent into the past to hunt me down, because I'll be the mother of the leader that will rise up against his machine empire!"   
  
Ranma shouted. "You mean Terminator, not Germinator! And how could you know that when the movie came out after you disappeared?"  
  
"What movie?" Kachiko asked. "That really happened. Although it was trying to kill Icky at the time instead of me. And it was a Germinator, since the machines were based on plants material rather metal. It was some made of some sort of funky bio-technology."  
  
"How do you germinate someone?"  
  
Kachiko told him.  
  
Ranma recoiled. "Oh god, that's disgusting. And I thought having a curse was bad."  
  
Kachiko nodded in sympathy. "It was the one time I felt sorry for Icky. Mostly."  
  
"Still, I don't think that guy's a Germinator. He looks metal to me," Ranma pointed out.  
  
Kachiko reconsidered that. "Hmm. You're right. Maybe after the plant machines fell, mankind didn't learn its lesson and made a metal machine empire instead. Although now that I think about it, that design looks awful familiar. And there's something about it making itself to look like a guy instead of a robot that's tickling at my memory." Kachiko began pondering that in earnest.  
  
While Kachiko wracked her mind, the mechanical Destroyer brought its hand around so it was pointing at the duo. It turned its flat palm up and down, causing the missiles to fire.   
  
Ranma saw that Kachiko was deep and thought, and shouted, "Look out!" Rather than taking a chance, he scooped her up in his arms and leaped into the air. He made it just in time as the missiles struck where Kachiko was standing a moment before.  
  
The moment Ranma landed, he sat Kachiko down and shouted, "What is your problem? You nearly got blown up-"  
  
Kachiko placed a finger to his lips to silence him. "I'm onto something here. It's right on the edge of my memory."  
  
Ranma rolled his eyes. "You stand here and keep out of danger. You're just getting in the way. I'll take care of things."  
  
"Sure you will," Kachiko snickered.  
  
Her lack of confidence inspired Ranma to new heights. He'd show her. He would take care of the metal monstrosity single handed. After all, if he could beat someone as tough as Saffron, he could take on a giant toaster oven.  
  
"Here I come, you hunk of tinfoil!" Ranma shouted.   
  
The Destroyer launched another volley of missiles and its eyebeams at Ranma. The youth darted around and over blasts and explosions until he was nearly upon the Destroyer.  
  
Rather than try to move out of the way, the Destroyer remained motionless. Or almost motionless, as its head began spinning around in a circle on its metal chassis. In less than a second, it was moving so fast it was little more than a gray blur. From around it, a vortex of fast spinning air seemed to appear and expand until it entirely surrounded its body. It was only then its head stopped moving, but the vortex remained.  
  
Ranma went in low, intent on knocking the robot off its legs, then really cutting loose and dismantling it bolt by bolt. However, as he went in low for the kick, his leg hit the vortex. Rather than simply being whipped about, it felt like he had hit a wall of tiny needles. He gave a yelp of pain and drew back, regaining his footing.  
  
"Well that ain't going to stop me!" he shouted at the Destroyer. He thrust his hands forward, and formed a circle with his thumbs and forefingers. "Moko Takabisha!" he shouted, and unleashed a sapphire beam of pure chi at the robot.  
  
The beam splashed harmlessly against the vortex.  
  
"Why you rotten-" Ranma prepared to unleash an even more powerful beam, but Kachiko's voice gained his attention.  
  
She shouted, "I know what's going on now! I just remembered. You keep throwing ineffectual attacks at it while I take care of things."  
  
"Ineffectual?! I'll show her!" Ranma blustered. "Moko Takabisha!"  
  
Again the beam splashed harmlessly against the vortex.   
  
Ranma found himself slightly at a loss. Maybe a Hiryuu Shoutan Ha. "Your mother was a moped and your father a pocket watch."  
  
The robot seemed unmoved by the insults.   
  
Ranma pulled a Ryouga by picking up the nearest piece of large pavement and hurling it at the vortex.   
  
Again it bounced harmlessly off.  
  
Refusing to back down, Ranma began grabbing a variety of items from a cart labeled 'Odds and Ends,' that had been abandoned by its owner when the Destroyer appeared, and threw them in the hopes that would could pierce the shield.   
  
A bokken was shredded into splinters.   
  
A cinderblock reduced to cinders.  
  
A barrel of Nannichuan shattered against the vortex.  
  
"Nannichuan?! AHHHH! What did I just do?!" Ranma ripped at his hair in frustration.  
  
Now it was the robot's turn to be at a loss as it watched Ranma drive his head repeatedly into the ground.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Designate: Mecha Dojo Destroyer I is a complete success."  
  
"Indeed, this time we shall rule the world. Nothing can stop us now. Nothing."  
  
A hand fell on each of their shoulders.   
  
"Except that."  
  
Kachiko laughed. "Well, well, well. If it isn't my favorite pair of aliens from Space Hunter Nebula X: Dipshit and Asswipe."  
  
"I am Designate: Dippe-Shick. My associate, Designate: As-Wype. You always had difficulty pronouncing our names, Designate: Kachiko Tendou."  
  
Kachiko looked the pair over, now that they had turned to confront her. They were exactly as she remembered. They wore skintight uniforms that only left their faces uncovered, and even then they wore visors to cover their eyes as well. The outfits were black, with only a touch of silver on the arms and legs, and with odd sorts of puffy rings around their torsos, wrists, and tops of their heads. With the way the uniforms tapered at the top, it had the effect of making them look like they were wearing full body sized condoms.  
  
"Over twenty years, and you idiots are still trying to take over the Earth using giant... well, not so giant this time, robots disguised as earth creatures. Your plans never work. Why do you two keep trying the same thing over and over when you know it's doomed to failure?"  
  
Dippe-Shick said, "It is only by the merest of chances that our plans failed. This time we were certain of success. Observe how your companion is completely helpless against the power of our robot."  
  
"He's hitting his head into the ground and your robot's just standing around because it's clueless."  
  
"That's relatively helpless, which is close enough for our purposes," As-Wype said.  
  
Kachiko made a dramatic show of cracking her knuckles. "All right, now that I know what I'm dealing with, it'll be easy to take your Mecha Dojo Destroyer apart, just like I did your Mecha Fire Breathing Dinosaur thingee."  
  
"Actually, you did not defeat it," As-Wype said.  
  
"Sure I did. I smashed it hard, and it fell into pieces."  
  
"Incorrect. It collapsed under its own weight because it was constructed with defective materials." Dippe-Shick gave a pointed look at his comrade.  
  
"But we were running low on funds. I had to hire the cheapest contractor," As-Wype insisted.  
  
"Only because you used most of our money to build an elaborate underground secret base in a dormant volcano."  
  
"If you want to conquer the world, you need an elaborate underground secret base. Everyone knows that."  
  
"He does have a point," Kachiko admitted. "And even if I didn't beat the first Mecha Fire Breathing Dinosaur thingee, I beat the second one you sent out."  
  
Dippe-Shick said, "Again, it was not your actions that resulted in its defeat. Someone neglected to carry a zero when calculating Designate: Mecha Fire Breathing Dinosaur II's energy consumption. Rather than ten weeks, its internal batteries only had ten minutes of power. After that, it became a large sculpture rather than a world conquering robot." He gave an even more pointed stare toward his companion.  
  
Kachiko began to bluster, "Well, I defeated the Mecha Giant Ape."  
  
"Incorrect. It was defeated when tricked into consuming acid filled bananas that destroyed its interior mechanisms. That was the result of Designate: Wacky Wakaba's actions, not yours."  
  
"The Mecha Fire Breathing Turtle was mine!"  
  
"Incorrect. Its defeat was due to the twin singing female midgets that summoned a giant hot spring turtle to combat it."  
  
"I beat the Mecha Moth! I know I beat that one!"  
  
"That is true," As-Wype admitted. "Of course it lacked any offensive weaponry with which to combat you. All it could do was fly around and become attracted to sources of light."  
  
"I told you a moth was a stupid creature to base a Mecha Robot design on," Dippe-Shick pointed out.  
  
Kachiko laughed. "See, I've defeated you before, and I'll do so again. Although I have to say, you've really gone to hell. All of your other creations were at least a few stories high. This guy's a midget compared to them."  
  
As-Wype said, "After the destruction of Designate: Mecha Moth, our budget for world domination had run out."  
  
"We were forced to work part time at a gay bar until we saved enough money to construct Designate: Mecha Dojo Destroyer," Dippe-Shick explained. "He might be small, but what he lacks in size, he makes up for in heart."  
  
"And offensive weapons," As-Wype added.  
  
Kachiko snorted. "I've stopped all of your evil schemes before-"  
  
"Actually, you only stopped one of our schemes."  
  
That earned Dippe-Shick a punch to the face. Kachiko cleared her throat, "As I was saying, I've stopped your evil schemes before, and I'll do so right now."   
  
Kachiko braved leaped back into the fray, confronting the vortex shrouded Mecha Dojo Destroyer, who was watching Ranma run back in forth, shouting, "I can't believe I wasted a cure like that!"  
  
She smirked at the two aliens. "I bet if you fired every weapon at me, it wouldn't cause a scratch. In fact I'll stand right here and give you a free shot." She turned around and bent over right in front of the robots, pointed at her bottom. "Right here, baby."  
  
As-Wype shouted to his robot, "Destroy Designate: Kachiko Tendou immediately. Full offensive barrage!"  
  
Over the entirety of the robot's body, a dozen hidden weapon emplacement suddenly popped up, revealing a wide array of energy and projectile weaponry. Targeting computers came online as every one of them was aimed at a single target: Kachiko Tendou.  
  
Ranma came out of his depressed state long enough to see Kachiko making a target of herself. He shouted, "No!" and leaped forward to take her out of the path of danger, regardless of the cost to himself.  
  
Kachiko side stepped his attempted lunge, grabbed Ranma by the shoulder and pulled him so he was standing alongside her. "Let's watch the fireworks together."  
  
Ranma's eyes nearly bugged out of his head as all the weapons, now pointed directly at him as well, charged up to their maximum power output. "Are you crazy?!"   
  
"No, I just know how to have fun," Kachiko smiled.  
  
And then the weapons went off as one. Lasers, Missiles, Explosive Shells, Plasma, and a host of other weapons screamed as they flew forth through the air, hurled from the robot. Their combined power was sufficient to destroy a fleet of battleships.  
  
And all of it impacted on the inside of the impenetrable forcefield.  
  
Ranma and Kachiko shielded their eyes as a bright light filled the interior of the vortex. When they could see again, both vortex and robot were gone. All that remained was a handful of pieces of blackened metal.  
  
Away from the explosion, As-Wype said, "Oops. I should have had Designate: Mecha Dojo Destroyer lower its forcefield before unleashing all of its weapons."  
  
Dippe-Shick sighed. "It appears we will have to work our eight o' clock shift after all. And here I was hoping to call off due to our conquering the world."  
  
"Do not worry. In another twenty years, we should have sufficient funds to construct a Mecha Dojo Destroyer II. Then we will conquer the world in the name of Space Hunter Nebula X."  
  
"Yes, there is that, I suppose. Let's head back so we can get ready for biker night."  
  
xxxxxxxxxx  
  
The pair of youths looked at the remains of their opponent. Ranma kicked a piece with his foot. "That'll teach you to mess with Ranma Saotome."  
  
Kachiko moved up to Ranma and pointed at his chest. "Looks like those eye blasts did a number on this." She fingered a blackened hole in the shirt.  
  
"Ah, I've handled worse," Ranma assured her.  
  
"I was more concerned about what you're wearing than you."  
  
"Gee, thanks," Ranma said dryly.  
  
"We'll take care of that." Kachiko began pulling him by the arm in the direction of the clothing store again.  
  
"Why do I have a bad feeling about this?" Ranma moaned.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Tentatively, Ranma entered the Tendou home, hoping for a quiet entrance where no one would hassle him and he could go to his room unmolested.  
  
The quintet of people in the living room killed, buried, and held a funeral for that idea in an instant.  
  
"And where were you two all this time?" Nabiki asked as she munched on a cracker.  
  
"Bonding." The words were muted as Kachiko was currently concealed behind enough bags and packages to hide all of her features above the knees. She moved past the group and headed in the direction of her room.  
  
Ranma tried following in her wake, but was immediately blocked by both Akane and Soun.  
  
"And just what is that supposed to mean?" Akane snapped.  
  
Soun's anger was evident. "Yes, explain yourself, Boy."   
  
"Ranma, I don't think it's really proper for you to try and bond with Mother," Kasumi fretted.   
  
"I didn't do anything with her!" Ranma insisted. "All we did was stop some aliens from taking over the Earth. Just because we worked well together that does not constitute bonding."  
  
Nabiki, not worried in the slightest about the comment, said, "Hey, Saotome, nice look."  
  
The others shifted their ire from Ranma to curiosity about his outfit. He was decked out in a tasteful silk white shirt and tan dress pants, a far cry from his usual casual outfits.  
  
He shifted uncomfortably. "Thanks."  
  
"Where did you get them?" Nabiki asked.  
  
"Kamy pmmd em omp mo mu," he mumbled to the ground.  
  
"What was that?" Akane asked.  
  
"Kachiko picked them out for me," he said just barely audibly.  
  
Nabiki began laughing. "You mean my mom had to dress you? Don't you think you're a little old for that?"  
  
"Mother used to dress us all the time," Kasumi pointed out,  
  
"Yeah, when we were five." Nabiki continued laughing. "Does she pick your underwear out for you, too?"  
  
"Don't be silly. It was hard enough stripping his old clothes off him and forcing him to put the new ones on. And he bolted when I showed him the tiger striped bikini briefs. He's such a big baby," Kachiko said as she reentered the room.  
  
"Oh, Mother really did dress him," Kasumi said, giving Ranma another disapproving look.  
  
Soun and Akane's were somewhat more... intense than Kasumi's.  
  
Kachiko appeared not to notice. "Anyway, it was worth it. I want him to look good on our date."  
  
"Date?!" Akane sputtered out.   
  
Soun couldn't even manage that. He simply turned red as the veins bulged across his forehead.  
  
"I never agreed to a date!" Ranma shouted.  
  
Kachiko shot him a sly look. "Oh come on. I know you want to go out with me. I saw the way you were ogling my breasts when you peeked on me while I was changing in the dressing room."  
  
"I didn't ogle your breasts, only the sides of them... That came out horribly wrong," Ranma lamented as Soun and Akane's tempers finally snapped and they fell on him.  
  
Seeing the pair go after Ranma like twin pitbulls after a piece of raw meat, Kachiko cried out, "Not the new outfit!" And dove in, trying to strip Ranma as the other two tried to pound on him.  
  
"This just isn't my week!" Ranma cried a moment before someone's foot stomped on his head.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
End Notes: A word of concern was given to me of Kachiko being too much an ANC, and it probably best I respond now. Yes, she is very annoying at times. She's has to be, given the direction which the story will take. Yes, this chapter things overall did go well for her, getting the better of Nabiki, Ranma, and the mecha in 50K or so. It was necessary to set things up for later, and this is the way the chapter came to me. Don't count on her having an easy time of it in the future. That's not to say she'll start losing left and right, just that it won't go all her way.   
  
  
This one had to be modified slightly, and it shows. I ended up doing 'filler' material in the second half after all. But I was having problems with how to end things, and decided to throw that out there. Not really satisfied with this the way I was with the panda demon part in the last chapter, but I think the 'Mecha-Godzilla homage.' is appropriate (I must be getting old since some of the prereaders didn't get the parodies. In my day, everyone watched the giant monster movies ^_^) but it was all that came to me, and there wasn't enough room remaining in the chapter to start anything else even before that. However in this chapter I did get the ground work and future actions for Soun in there, as well as getting a grip on Kachi's relative martial arts skill, Ranma losing to her, and some Nabiki-Kachi interaction. Tentative plans for next chapter are for Kachiko to finally end up in school and meeting more of the fun loving cast at last as the others start to adjust to her presence, and start to react to it. Should be concentrating more on her presence in the present than what happened in the past for a while now.  
  
Special Thanks to:  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
Max. M.  
Michael Chasse  
Chris Horton  
The Apprentice 


	5. The Things We Wish for chapter 5

The Things We Wish For...  
Chapter 4  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
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http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Note: I'm now experimenting with using the 'xxxx' to denote POV changes in the same scene sometimes. I'd just double line breaks, but it isn't obvious on plain text message like I usually send. If it's too distracting, let me know and I'll try something else.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present, there's only the slight complications that she's there at the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The muscles in Akane's back woke up in protest. Their complaints lessened only slightly as she sat up and attempted to massage them from their uncomfortable slumber. It had been too long since she had slept on the floor, even with the tatami mat underneath her. It was beyond her how Ranma could have lived on the road for so long and subjected himself to sleeping in that kind of discomfort. The next time Akane went shopping, she would have to purchase some additional padding for the mat he used on the floor.  
  
Now fully awake, Akane took in her surroundings. She was in Kasumi's room. Now that she thought about it, she had never slept in it before. The handful of times they had guests, or Akane's room had been rendered uninhabitable due to everything from leaks to termite infestation, she had slept in Nabiki's room rather than Kasumi's. It was probably because they were closest to one another in age. Of course, the last time had been over four years ago, and Nabiki had changed enough since then that Akane felt more comfortable staying in Kasumi's bedroom. Sleeping in the same room with someone who had a bad tendency to sell compromising pictures of their sister for pocket change was never a good idea.  
  
But the feel to Kasumi's room, as pleasant as it was, still made Akane uncomfortable. It was different enough that it bothered her. What Akane really wanted to do was sleep in her own room, with its own feel, in her own bed. Of course, concessions had to be made with her mother returned to them, and because it was Akane's wish that had set the events in motion (although now that she thought about it, Kasumi bore some responsibility in the matter since it had been her suggestion to wish for their mother back), it only made sense she had to give up her room, but it didn't make her sore back feel any better.  
  
"Why can't she just get back together with Dad the way she was before she died?" Akane grumbled. As it was, her mother was causing far more trouble than even the usual visitor to the Tendou household, which was doubly vexing since her presence should have made everything better instead of worse.  
  
But there was no way around it. Kachiko Tendou had returned, all of one year older than Akane, and there was simply going to have to be a period of adjustment. Oh, but what an adjustment they were undergoing. Akane just hoped Kachiko returned to normal soon. She had wished for her mother back, a second parent figure that she barely remembered, not someone that wanted to 'hang' with her.  
  
Shooting a glance at the alarm clock on the nightstand, Akane made note of the time. It was getting late, and she had to get going. Throwing an extra bathrobe of Kasumi's over her nightgown, Akane headed toward the bath. Living in a house with two sisters and three other men meant making a sort of unofficial schedule for when people could make use of the bath in the mornings. Kasumi was always the first up and finished with it before anyone, so that was never a problem. Nabiki was second, with Akane third, and the men in some other order. Right about now Nabiki should be finishing up and Akane would have free reign for half an hour.  
  
Upon opening the door to the bath, Akane learned otherwise.  
  
"Move over."  
  
"No, you move over. I was here first."  
  
"No, I was here first. It's my house, and you're my child, so you need to learn to behave and mind your place. Mommies go first."  
  
"Oh, please. You might get Daddy and the others to roll over for you, but that's not going to work on me."  
  
"Go use the furo and let me brush."  
  
"I always brush my teeth first, then use the furo."  
  
Akane sighed. It was quite the scene. Nabiki stood clad only in a towel, and their mutual mother wore only a sleeveless halter top that ended nowhere near her waist and a pair of pink panties. Both were armed with toothbrushes and jostling for position next to the sink. "Can't you two just share it?"  
  
"I was here first and want to brush my teeth in peace," Nabiki said.  
  
"I'd do it, but there isn't enough room since her hips are nearly as wide as yours."  
  
"They are not."  
  
"The heck they aren't. All of the clothing you loaned me was just as loose as Akane's, Hippy." Kachiko used her own hips to push Nabiki to the side slightly.  
  
Nabiki forced her way back to where her previous spot, though her attempt to bump her mother away proved futile. "And speaking of renting things, exactly where did you get the money to not only pay for that, but for your new wardrobe?"  
  
"I have my sources."  
  
"Those sources wouldn't happen to be my pockets, would they?"  
  
"Oh ho! As though someone who would rent clothing to her destitute mother has the right to accuse her of stealing as well. And by the way, you don't have a job, so what's your source of income, besides shaking down time traveling parents, hmm? Maybe I should be the one accusing you of doing something wrong."  
  
"I have my sources," Nabiki stated every bit as firmly as her mother had before.  
  
Akane was chilled by just how alike the two girls were, shooting cold glares at one another. Quickly inserting herself into the fray, before the duo really started tearing into one another, Akane walked up and said, "Come on, guys. We can all get along. We're just under a little pressure from all the changes we've undergone over the last few days. We have to make concessions until we can learn to live under the same roof." She turned to Nabiki. "Why don't you let Mom have the sink first, just like you would a guest? Later on we'll discuss who should get the bath second tomorrow and everything will run a lot more smoothly."  
  
Kachiko gave a hard, affectionate slap to Akane's back. "Yeah, listen to your younger, and far more respectful, sister. She knows the proper way to treat house guests. I can tell who my favorite child is going to be."  
  
Akane shifted uncomfortably under the grip. Even coming from someone that was only seventeen, the words had an odd, almost pleasing, effect on her. Still, the situation was too odd to truly relax in, so Akane tried moving away. "Mom, cut it out."  
  
The words seemed to stir Kachiko in some way as well, and she hurriedly removed her hand from Akane's shoulder. Turning back to Nabiki, she said, "All I need to do is finish brushing anyway and then you can have the sink. In fact, I'll show you my Ultra-Quick Brushing Style."  
  
Nabiki said, "No thanks. I don't need to learn how to brush my teeth from you yet again."  
  
"But this is the quick way. Give me your brush." Without waiting for a response, Kachiko snatched Nabiki's out of her hand before she could react.  
  
"Hey! Give me that back. I don't want your germs all over it."  
  
"Relax. I've only got one cold sore, so there's nothing to worry about." Kachiko brandished the toothbrushes in hand, as though there were stubby daggers of death rather than bristly tools of oral hygiene. "Once, during the long and difficult journeys of my youth, I discovered a lost temple in the Himalayas. It was there that I conquered its ancient guardian and discovered this ancient Indian technique of the obscure, and dangerous art known as Brush Fu."  
  
"You made that up," Nabiki said.  
  
"I did not!" Kachiko insisted. And it was the truth. Of course, she had been in India because of a school field trip, rather than some exotic training journey. And she hadn't exactly found the temple on her own. It was on a map Wakaba had given her that listed the temple as being in the deepest, highest part of the Himalayas. Although for some reason the map failed to mention that the path was prone to avalanches, the constant temperatures were well below zero, the freak snowstorms were bad enough to cause even the Sherpas to shun it, and that numerous tribes of carnivorous Yetis frequented the area. And the course on the map actually led to a bottomless pit rather than a temple, but it wasn't Wakaba's fault the map was slightly off. It turned out the temple was close by, and it had an ancient guardian too; ancient in the sense that he was a ninety-year old man who was suffering from arthritis. But in his prime he had probably been tough. It ended up with the master of the temple consenting to teach Kachiko the ancient technique of Brush Fu in return for leaving him alone. When Kachiko returned, Wakaba had been so relieved that she broke down and cried hard enough that she had to be sedated.  
  
But there was no need to bother the girls with such minor details.  
  
"Observe the pinnacle of what one thousand years of training in the art of brushing can achieve!" Kachiko loaded up the brushes with toothpaste until it was falling off the sides, then brought them up to her teeth. She smiled once for the girls, then went to work.  
  
Her hands were two blurs that could have rivaled Ranma's Amagurikan on a good day. The air was alive with electricity and a hum that made the very air itself vibrate. The smell of fluoride filled the air, and even Nabiki raised an eyebrow at the amount of white foam that began to drip for Kachiko's mouth.   
  
And as suddenly as it started, the brushing stopped.  
  
Akane whistled in appreciation. "I can see where that could be useful. That took less than three seconds, and you had to have gotten every spot with how vigorously your hands were moving. I can see where it might be... Mom, why are you making gagging noises while your eyes are bulging?"  
  
"I think she's choking on one of the brushes," Nabiki said casually.  
  
Thinking quickly, Akane grabbed the struggling Kachiko from behind and gave her a Heimlich Maneuver. The toothbrush went flying across the room.  
  
"You owe me a new toothbrush." Nabiki decided she would skip the brushing today and started to clean herself off before heading for the furo.  
  
"What kind of a stupid technique was that?" Akane said.  
  
"Told you... It was... Dangerous. Only a true... Master... Can use such techniques... Safely," Kachiko gasped out.  
  
"I have enough dangerous things going on in my life without adding brushing to it," Akane said firmly.  
  
"A true martial artist... Fears nothing," Kachiko rasped out, along with a good quantity of foam. She wiped her mouth off with a towel, leaving a huge quantity of foam on it, and headed for the door to the bathroom.  
  
"Mom," Akane protested.  
  
"What?"  
  
Akane pointed to her skimpy outerwear. "You shouldn't be walking around the house dressed like that."   
  
Kachiko reexamined her garments. "I suppose you're right. I'm not used to other guys being around. Dad used to be the only other man here, and I liked prancing around in my underwear because he thought it was so improper. He was so uptight it was really annoying. He never let me do anything that wasn't absolutely 'proper' for a woman. Be happy your old man isn't that strict. Of course's he's way more perverted than my Father is, still, I think you've got the better end of the deal." Kachiko exited the room.  
  
A moment later, the girls heard a gasp that could only be their father's. It was followed by an, "Eek! You pervert! Don't look at me like that!" and the sound of a fist meeting flesh.  
  
"Yep, some adjustments definitely need to be made, oh sister of mine," Nabiki said idly to the cringing Akane as she relaxed in the furo.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Today's shaping up to be a wonderful day."  
  
"You need to be more upbeat," Akane told Nabiki. It had taken them longer than usual to finish in the bathroom, put on their clothing and make up, and finally head downstairs to the dining room for breakfast.   
  
Akane entered and saw everyone but Kachiko was already present at the table. She smiled at Ranma and walked over to take her usual position between him and his father. As she sat down, she found the floor unexpectedly lumpy and warm.  
  
"Damnit, you're too big for my lap! Get off!"  
  
Akane nearly jumped in the air. She turned to see her mother had somehow been quick and agile enough to contort herself into the position between Ranma and Genma even as Akane had been in the process of sitting down. A low growl issued from Akane at what had just happened.   
  
Kasumi cleared her throat. She said to Kachiko, "There's a space next to Father."  
  
"Good." Kachiko responded, then said to Akane. "There you go. Plenty of room over there."   
  
Akane relented and accepted the seat, decidedly displeased that her mother was sitting next to Ranma and smiling at him in a way Akane most definitely did not like. Not that Ranma was doing anything about it either.   
  
As breakfast was served, everyone directed their attention to the newcomer at the table, who seemed oblivious to it for the most part as she accepted some food.   
  
"I'm not sure you attending school is such a good idea," Soun said, staring longingly at Kachiko.  
  
"I need to further my education and get a college degree, since all the martial arts instructors are getting them. Besides, I want to hang around people my own age and do the same things they do. And it's where I belong." Kachiko accepted a bowl of rice offered by Kasumi.   
  
"But Mother, instead of spending time in school, you could stay here and get to know Father better," Kasumi offered.   
  
"All the more reason to go," Kachiko said icily. "Look, we'll just say I'm your cousin who's a transfer student. And for God's sake, don't call me 'Mom.' I don't want people to think I'm some sort of weirdo."  
  
"People won't think you're a weirdo because we call you Mom," Nabiki provided.   
  
"Good."  
  
"It'll be for other reasons."  
  
Kachiko shot Nabiki another glare. She placed her chopsticks into her bowl and met nothing but the bottom. She looked down to discover it empty. She stared at it curiously before asking Kasumi for seconds. "Actually, I want all of you to start calling me Kachi from now on, even when we're outside of school. This whole 'Mom' thing is really starting to freak me out. It's like you're my kids or something."  
  
"All right, Kachi," Soun said happily.  
  
"You can call me Miss Tendou," she started coldly.  
  
Soun's moment of happiness passed and he stared depressingly back into the table.  
  
Kachiko said, "It's just I want my life to be restored to some semblance of normalcy."  
  
Nabiki said, "I doubt if your life held any semblance of that. On the other hand, I think you'll fit right in, Kachi."  
  
"Thanks, I guess," Kachiko said reluctantly. She went to take a bite, and discovered her bowl empty once again. She hadn't realized she was that distracted if she finished two bowls of food and not realized it. She got a third helping, narrow waistline be damned.  
  
"How are we going to get you admitted?" Ranma asked as he continued shoveling his own food in his mouth.  
  
"We'll just say my transfer information must have gotten lost in the mail. Then we can slip in later and alter my old high school files and make them into new ones or something," Kachiko said as though breaking and entering and falsifying records was as natural as walking down the street.   
  
"I guess that can work," Ranma finished swallowing the last of his rice.  
  
Kachiko said, "Oops. You have some food on your cheek."  
  
*You're such a sloppy eater, Boy,* Genma signed as he continued helping himself yet again to Kachiko's bowl of rice while her attention was elsewhere.  
  
Ranma rubbed his left cheek with his arm.  
  
"It's on the other side. I'll get it." She grabbed Ranma by the head and licked the offending grain of rice from his cheek running her tongue far below where it lay and continuing long after removing it.  
  
Akane made a strangling noise. She was about to shout in outrage when a booming voice at the head of the table bellowed, "RANMA! HOW DARE YOU SIT BEFORE ME AND SEDUCE MY WIFE!"  
  
A demon head three times larger and radiating an aura or naked rage greater than any had seen before emitted from Soun. All save Kasumi cringed away from the aura of raw terror he projected.   
  
So great was the fear that even Ranma found his hair standing on end and his legs involuntarily moving him to a far corner of the room. His mouth ran on automatic as she got out, "ItsnotmyfaultshediditIllbelesssloppyfromnowon!"  
  
The demon head shrank down. "You'd better watch your step, boy. I'm not putting up with your usual shenanigans," Soun warned. He was going to say more, but felt the table tremble under his palm.   
  
Akane felt the same thing and looked under it. "Mom, I mean Kachi, what are you doing there?"  
  
Eyes wide with fear, Kachiko said, "I'm hiding from that scary thing. It had a huge demon head, and looked evil and had a long snakelike tongue. Didn't you see it? It was a monster."  
  
Nabiki looked under it as well and smirked at the sight. "I thought you said true martial artists weren't afraid of anything."  
  
"You've got to draw the line somewhere, and terrifying demon headed things are over the line. So are tentacle demons." Kachiko shuddered.  
  
Soun finally stuck his own head under the table. "I'm sorry, Kachi-chan. I just-"  
  
"Keep away!" she screeched and scurried out from under the table and behind Ranma. "Protect me!" she shoved him forward.  
  
"I'm the one he's angry at! He likes you! You protect me!" he switched around so that he was behind her and shoved her forward.  
  
"Be a man!" she grabbed him by the shoulders and thrust him forward again.  
  
He switched them again. "You be a man."   
  
"I don't have a gender curse so I can't be." She ducked behind Ranma.  
  
Soun burst into tears. "My own wife is afraid of me."  
  
Kasumi tried consoling her father. "Now, now. I'm sure it'll be all right." she turned to Kachiko as she and Ranma continued jockeying for cover behind the other. "Mother, Father promises not to do that again in your presence."  
  
Kachiko relaxed slightly, now regarding Soun in a more cautious light. "Well, just so long as he doesn't. That was way too creepy. My hand's still trembling." She held it up to show them.  
  
"Well, it's not completely uncalled for," Nabiki said, with a sly smile. "After all, you did go over the line there. I mean, do you really think it's proper to lick the face of your daughter's fiancé?"   
  
It took a moment for what Nabiki said to register with Kachiko. "What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
With obvious pleasure, Nabiki said, "Oh, that's right. In all the confusion, no one thought to mention it to you. Ranma's engaged to Akane."  
  
A pall that eradicated any lingering vestiges of Soun's aura suddenly seemed to hover all over the room. The air around Kachiko distorted slightly, and her eyes narrowed as she was surrounded by an aura of her own rage. And then, even more suddenly than it formed, the storm broke loose.   
  
"That's insane!" Kachiko wailed in dramatic fashion as she pleaded to the skies. "Sixteen is too young to be engaged! You have your whole life ahead of you! No one should be issued a death sentence when they have so much potential awaiting them! You haven't learned anything yet about the way life really works. You're still changing and growing into the person you'll go on to become. It's always a mistake to marry at such a young age. Given the way marriages during or right after high school turn out, especially with such a high divorce rate, it'll practically guarantee things will end up doomed. It'll lead to nothing but misery and woe. I absolutely forbid this travesty to take place." She slammed her hand down hard enough to nearly crack the table in half, the look in her eyes an open challenge to those that would oppose her will..  
  
Akane, openly moved by her mother's concern, stepped forward and spoke. "Mom. It's okay with me." She blushed slightly. "I mean, it's not like I'm being forced-"  
  
"Who said anything about you? I'm concerned about poor Ranma. There's no way I'll allow him to throw his life away by marrying now."  
  
"Um, I," Ranma started to say.  
  
Kachiko gave Ranma a tearful glance. "You don't want to settle down before you're ready, right?"  
  
"Umm, well of course I don't want to before I'm ready. But-"  
  
Before he could continue, Genma ran up behind his son in order to give him words of encouragement, as well as a shove in Akane's direction. "But you have to get married, boy."  
  
Soun joined his friend and helped push Ranma from the other side. He nodded solemnly. "That's right. I'm sorry, Kachi-chan. But Genma and I swore an oath that our families will be united through marriage. It's a matter of honor."  
  
Kachiko stomped her foot like a petulant child. "No! I forbid it. I'm the mother here and I have some say in the matter."  
  
Soun appeared on the verge of tears from the heated argument with his beloved. However, the weight of the promise in his heart enabled his resolve to remain firm. "It is not negotiable. The Tendou and Saotome schools must be united."  
  
"NOOOOO!" Kachiko shouted at the top of her lungs. "I forbid... wait a second. The schools need to be united. You mean it's not an arrangement specifically for Ranma to wed Akane?"  
  
"Now you've gone and done it," Nabiki said in a tired voice.  
  
Hesitantly, Genma said, "Err, well, not exactly. Tendou and I agreed to unite the families so the schools would be joined. He had three girls at the time, so it seemed unwise to make the agreement specifically to any one of them. We wanted to keep our options open."  
  
"Options open?" Kachiko said pensively. "Options open. Yes. Options open."  
  
Everyone in the room could practically hear the gears of Kachiko's mind turning.   
  
Finally, Kachiko came out of her thoughtful pose. Now she bore an expression brimming with confidence and understanding. "Here's a solution that will satisfy everyone. I have no argument against the agreement. In fact, I think it would be a good idea and it has my blessing."  
  
Soun breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
"Wait for it, Daddy," Nabiki warned.  
  
Kachiko followed up with, "However, there are some stipulations."  
  
"Oh?" Soun said as everyone but Nabiki tensed up.   
  
"The first is that Ranma is allowed to marry whichever girl he chooses."  
  
No one found they could argue with that. If anything, the room seemed to take on an air of relief at the reasonable suggestion.  
  
Kachiko smiled beatifically. "And the second is that no marriage will take place before both participants graduate high school."  
  
That roused Genma and Soun from the air of lassitude that had begun to surround them. Together, they got out, "But it would be better if it was sooner."  
  
The cold glare Kachiko shot both men managed to silence even Genma. "No. It would be better if we wait a couple of years and see what happens. There's no need to rush into something as serious as marriage. It's not like there's a time limit or anything. I don't think anyone's ready to be parent here?" She turned her gaze to the three girls and Ranma.   
  
Kasumi looked uncomfortable. Nabiki scoffed. Akane blushed furiously and said, "No way!" Ranma looked as though Ryouga had just punched him between the eyes as he tried to conceive little versions of him running around shouting, "Daddy!" His body convulsed once.  
  
Kachiko appeared satisfied at the results. "I'd say all the participants are in agreement. Oh yes, one last thing. It's a minor matter, really. Since I'm a Tendou, I'm qualified to fulfill the promise as well."  
  
Soun nodded. "That's understandable and makes sense... What? No! You can't!   
  
Kachiko openly scoffed at the statement. "Of course I can. I'm a female of the species. Single. Heterosexual. Obviously capable of bearing children." She ruffled Kasumi's hair.  
  
"But you're married to me!" Crying full bore, Soun latched onto Kachiko's leg like a drowning man thrown a life preserver, which he would actually soon need with the amount of water his eyes were generating. Kachiko responded by pounding him on the head, trying to pry him off, shouting that she wasn't a paleontologist so she had no interest in 'Old Fossils' and that he should release his deathgrip on her leg before she really let him have it.  
  
That signaled an end to breakfast. Everyone else left the room as Kachiko was forced to drag the sobbing Soun attached to her leg.  
  
Akane and Ranma left together. As they made their way through the house, Akane asked, "So, do you think Mom's going to get her way this time?"  
  
"Probably. Although, now that I think about it, it's probably not such a bad thing. I think maybe she's right." Ranma stopped and became lost in thought as he tried to find the right words. He closed his eyes, and tried visualizing everything as he said it. "I mean, I have to admit, I've always felt kind of trapped or forced into doing things with my Dad and yours always pressuring us to get married. But the idea of waiting a while really appeals to me. It's like no one's trying to force me into something and I can just take it easy since there ain't a hurry. Don't you think so...?" Ranma trailed off, finding Akane nowhere in sight.  
  
xxxxxxxxxx  
  
A miasma of anger mixed with disappointment shrouded Akane. She had left Ranma's side after he said the postponement was a good thing. Not that she was in a hurry to be married or have kids either, Kachiko was right about that, but he could have at least had the decency to put up a token protest about the ultimatum. Instead, he was his usual carefree self without considering how other people might feel about the matter. Even if said people were not entirely certain about how they felt.   
  
He could be such a jerk sometimes.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma walked along the top of the fence, fully aware of the wall of silence that had somehow risen between him and Akane as the two of them, and Kachiko, made their way to school. Evidently Akane didn't feel the same way about the delay that he did. Sure, she had been willing to marry him once, but one of the reasons he had not pressed the issue about marriage even after the wedding was disrupted was because somewhere deep down inside he felt the timing was off. Kachiko had been right on the money when she said marriage at sixteen was too soon. There was plenty of time for that sort of thing later in life, when he didn't have school, constant training, people harassing him left and right, and the rest of the chaos his life held to distract him from the importance of family life.   
  
Regardless of how his father had raised him and how well he had turned out, Ranma wasn't going to do things the same way. Settling down in marriage and having children was important and all-consuming, and if he was going to be married, it wasn't so he could run off with his child for a decade or so and leave everything else behind. On the other hand, maybe if he married now, in five or ten years he would want to run away, like his father had, and live on his own with only a child in tow. There were times during the very worst of moments when he felt sort of trapped in his situation with all the other girls and rivals hounding him. Those times usually passed quickly, since in his eyes things being boring would have been far worse to deal with, but his mind could grasp the edges of the concept of what being married and settling down in one spot for the rest of his life right now would be like. He thought he just might be able to empathize, however slightly, with how his father felt being married and tied down and why he would have left the woman he loved for so long. And the idea that Ranma might feel the same way at any point in his life disturbed him. So with unusual seriousness, he considered the matter and felt it would be best to hold things off until he was certain he was ready to settle down for good. He didn't need any further complications like that now. In a few years, who knew.   
  
Akane was just going to have to deal with it. He would have discussed it with her, but he had no idea where to begin, wasn't comfortable with sharing the serious feelings (with her or anyone), and knew she wouldn't take it well no matter how reasonable it was. So he let the matter alone, confident things would return to normal, like they always did.  
  
It was ironic that someone who had otherwise caused him nothing but grief since her arrival had finally done something in his favor, even if Kachiko's motives were stemming from her own interests rather than his, regardless of what she claimed. What made her worse in some ways was that he couldn't deal with her they way he could others because of the connection to the Tendou family, as well as the fact that until a couple of days ago she was dead. Even he could sympathize with being given a second chance under those conditions. It was just a pity she wasn't directing her attention to Mr. Tendou instead of himself.   
  
Still, with Kachiko actually helping him for a change, maybe it was a sign of things to come, and that she wouldn't be causing him any more problems.   
  
"Ranma, why are you walking on the top of the fence?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"Balance exercise."   
  
"Oh." she said, then lashed out with her right, striking one of the fence's supports just as Ranma put his full weight on it. The blow was enough to bend the metal forty-five degrees. Gravity took over from that point, and dumped Ranma into the water of the canal running alongside.   
  
"It's not working very well," Kachiko said in all earnestness.  
  
Ranma dragged her drenched person out of the canal, spitting water out along the way. She raised her fist in Kachiko's direction. "What'd you do that for?!"  
  
"Testing your balance." She walked ahead past the damaged section of the chain-link fence, and nimbly jumped up to the top. She proceeded to walk backward effortlessly along it. "You failed, by the way."  
  
Ranma jumped over the fence and onto the street next to Akane. Now his fiancee's ire was replaced with some measure of sympathy, and she handed Ranma a handkerchief. The cursed-girl used it to dab at her face.  
  
"So what's the school like nowadays?" Kachiko asked as she continued walking backward.  
  
Ranma shrugged. "It's school. They teach boring things. You talk with friends. Your enemies harass you. The usual. Oh, the principal's a major nutcase. He's got a Hawaiian fetish, makes up stupid rules, and is always trying to cut your hair short. Worse, he's a Kunou."  
  
That perked Kachiko's interest. "The principal's name is Kunou? You mean they finally got rid of Principal Faust?"  
  
Akane and Ranma looked at each other. Akane shrugged. "I've never heard of a Principal Faust. Principal Kunou has been in charge since Kasumi was there. I don't know who was there before."  
  
Kachiko seemed surprised, then visibly brightened at the statement. "Wow. I didn't think they'd ever get rid of Principal Faust."  
  
Seeing her distracted, Ranma at last acted on her plan. The redhead pointed directly behind Kachiko and shouted, "Look! It's Haley's Comet!" Then hit the support Kachiko had been standing on.  
  
Akane rolled her eyes. "Honestly, Ranma, no one is stupid enough to fall for that-"  
  
*Splash*  
  
The two looked at the disturbance in the canal where Kachiko's body had hit.   
  
"All right, maybe Mom, I mean Kachi, is stupid enough to fall for it."  
  
The two waited for Kachiko to surface and begin cursing at Ranma. Fifteen seconds passed, and the last of the ripples had disappeared when the pair realized something was wrong.  
  
"Looks like we know who you inherited your buoyancy from," Ranma said as she leaped over the newly ruined section of fence and into the water.   
  
Akane had reached the shore of the canal by the time Ranma surfaced with Kachiko tucked firmly under her arm. She made it the rest of the way, Akane helping with the burden and placing Kachiko's limp body on shore.  
  
Ranma looked down at the motionless girl. "Umm. she might need mouth-to-mouth. I think it would be a really bad idea if I-"  
  
"Yes, it would be," Akane confirmed. She went to her knees next to Kachiko's head and bent over.  
  
It was at that moment that Kachiko sat up lightning quick, shouting "But I'm not a lesbian!" Her head impacted with Akane's hard enough to knock the bent over girl backwards and onto her bottom.  
  
Seeing Akane was only momentarily dazed, Ranma turned her attention to Kachiko, who was obviously out of sorts as well. "Are you all right?"  
  
It took several blinks for Kachiko to focus on Ranma. "Yes. That was strange. One second everything was fine, then all of a sudden the world seemed to lose focus and I got dizzy. The next thing I knew you were fishing me out of the water."   
  
"What was that bit about not being a lesbian?" Akane asked, her sensibilities returned.   
  
Kachiko made a face that promised violence for someone. Through gritted teeth. "I was remembering this Grade-A bull dyke named Yumi that used to go to school. She was pure evil, always trying to come up with ways to trick girls into kissing her and making them as perverted as she was. She was always causing trouble. She hit on me constantly."  
  
"Well, we don't have anyone like that," Ranma assured her. "Plenty of jerks at school, and energy draining teachers, but no lesbians trying to trick girls into kissing them."  
  
"I can deal with anything, as long as I don't have to fend of the advances of women." Kachiko said. "By the way, how did I end up in the water?"  
  
"You, ah, fell in," Ranma said.  
  
Kachiko looked at the fence she had been standing on right before everything went dizzy. "No doubt because the defective metal the post I was standing on just happened to give out as I crossed it, right Ranma?"  
  
"Sounds good to me." Ranma put on her best poker face.   
  
Kachiko punched her in it. She then whipped out a small notebook and spoke aloud as she scribbled in pencil, "Can't lie worth a damn." And replaced it within her blouse.  
  
"Hey, you knocked me into the water first!" Ranma protested.   
  
"He's right, Mom. I mean Kachi."  
  
"It's different when a girl knocks a guy in the water than when a guy knocks a girl in the water. Everyone knows that."  
  
"Oh, good point," Akane said.  
  
"It is not!" Ranma shouted.  
  
Kachiko gave a laugh, one that was reserved for people watching small dogs try to chase cars in vain. "Of course it is."  
  
Akane nodded in solemn agreement. "Ask anyone. They'll tell you."  
  
"It's not the same thing!" Ranma insisted, but it was to no avail as the girls, confident in having made an unarguable point, continued on to school.   
  
"I'll prove it!" she shouted at their ever dwindling forms. Ranma looked around until she spotted someone that could answer the question. "Hey, you!"  
  
"No time to talk. Little Azusa is late for school." Azusa speeded along  
  
Thinking quickly, Ranma dug around her pocket until she came up with what she had been searching for. She held it high above her head for Azusa to see. "I'll trade you this really, really cute thing if you'll answer a question."  
  
Azusa turned on a dime, picked it up, named it Marcelle, and skated up to Ranma. She looked at the item he held. "It's just a bottle cap."  
  
That was unexpected. "Err, it's a cute bottle cap."  
  
"It's rusty. Rusty isn't cute. I'm going to school."  
  
"Aw come on. I'll give you something else cute if you answer a question for me."  
  
Azusa made a circle around Ranma, looking over her the way a vulture might examine a man lost in a desert and fifty miles from the nearest oasis. She said, "Okay. If Azusa can have Louis, she'll answer your question."  
  
Ranma nodded, happy to finally win by making her answer the question. "Is a girl knocking a guy in the water the same thing as a guy knocking a girl in the water?"  
  
"Don't be silly. Of course not. Everyone knows that. Come along, Louis."  
  
"But it is the same thing! They aren't different in-- Hey! Give me back the drawstring on my pants!"  
  
"You said Little Azusa could have Louis, and now she does. Bye-bye."  
  
Ranma lunged at the diminutive skater, but she darted into the busy street to avoid the clutching grasp. Ranma tried to pursue, but her pants fell to her ankles and she tripped over them, falling facefirst into a pile of gooey mud. She remained motionless.  
  
"This just ain't my day," she complained to the ground.   
  
There was the sound of two vehicles colliding. A moment later a voice shouted, "Oh no! That container full of deadly snakes just broke open."  
  
Ranma found the energy to pull her face out of the mud. Sure enough, a small army of serpents was heading right for her at eye level. "Nope, not my day at all."  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"And there's no concertina wire along the top of the wall either."  
  
"No, M... I mean Kachi."  
  
"Highly trained, genetically enhanced, intelligent guard dogs?"  
  
"None of those either."  
  
"Lasers to fry anyone trying to escape the school grounds?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Things sure have changed around here."  
  
While Kachiko stood in the middle of the school yard, taking in all of the changes since her days of attending Furinkan, Akane turned to see Ranma, now male, had finally rejoined them. "What kept you?"  
  
"You know, the usual," Ranma said casually.  
  
Kachiko turned as well. "Hey, I like the belt and vest, but I'm not so sure about the boots. Are those snakeskin?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Akane said, "Um, Ranma, you look a little puffy."  
  
"It's just the snake venom. Don't worry. It'll pass."  
  
Just as Akane was about to say more, the familiar form of the Principal popped up before the trio. "Aloha everybody."  
  
"Aloha," Kachiko said merrily. "I didn't know they had cruise directors at the school."  
  
"That's the principal," Ranma said dryly to Kachiko.   
  
Kachiko considered that. "It's still an improvement over fascist dictators."  
  
The Principal turned his full attention to Ranma. "I be given ya da good news first, my little keike."  
  
"If you're bothering me with it first, that means it's something extraordinarily bad," Ranma retorted.   
  
"Be showing a little more faith, Mr. Saotome. I be getting de great inspiration on how to raise de school spirit and showing support for Furinkan."  
  
"And just how's that?"  
  
The Principal whipped out a needle and some jars of dye. "We be giving all the little keikeis tattoos to be showing their loyalty to de school. Here's what they be looking like when they're done." The principal rolled up his sleeve and showed them the tattoo on his bicep. It showed a picture of the Principal's smiling face with the letters 'Furinkan Forever' directly above it.   
  
Akane backed behind Ranma as he recoiled in horror at the image. "No way am I getting that hideous thing put on my arm!"  
  
The Principal brandished his tools like they were hair clippers. "Don't be so reluctant. All de keikeis be getting de ink done nowadays."   
  
"No way!"   
  
Ranma met the Principal's lunge with a boot to the face. Showing more resolve than usual, the Principal continued to press the issue, trying to put the tattoo anywhere on Ranma's body.  
  
As the fight began in earnest, Kachiko backed away and assessed things with a critical eye. The Principal might have appeared the buffoon, but he had some measure of skill. Ranma was the real object of her attention, though. She could practically feel the power within him, and there was no doubt he was holding back, most likely for the Principal's sake. She hadn't realized he was that good. That made her a bit wary. She was used to being the top dog around school, and very much liked that position. She had automatically assumed that would be the case here as well. The idea that Ranma might be stronger irked her, even if she did like him. Martial arts and romance were two different things. Still, strength was different from skill, and she had encountered people with more raw power than her. It was tactical skills, adaptability, deception, and ruthlessness that were the keys to victory, especially when it came to powerful opponents. She'd just have to come up with something to counter Ranma's superior power when the time came for that rematch he'd been harassing her for.  
  
Kachiko's attention was so totally focused on studying Ranma's style that she failed to notice the man approaching until he was next to her. Suddenly she found her vision blocked by a taller, intruding form.   
  
"Can it be?" he said   
  
Caught off guard, Kachiko looked around to see if he might actually be asking someone else, but she was the only one present. "Can what be what?"  
  
"Can it be that I have suffered a blow to the head and am seeing double, or is it that I have been blessed with not one, but two Akane Tendous?"  
  
"Oh, that," Kachiko said. "Actually, my name is Kachiko, but you can call me Kachi. The strong resemblance I have to Akane is because I am her cousin, and definitely not because I'm her mother who traveled through time and ended up stuck here because of a wish."  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma heard Akane gasp. Since something potentially important might have come up, he finished off the Principal, and turned to see what had caught her attention. "Oh, crap. We should have seen this coming."  
  
"Ranma, make him go away. We shouldn't be letting Kunou harass Mo... Kachi."  
  
"Aw, come on. She can handle him."  
  
"But I don't want her thinking everyone in the school is as much an idiot as him."  
  
"Don't worry about it. There's only one Kunou, thankfully. And besides, if he's bothering her, that means he's not bothering you."  
  
"Well, there is that," Akane admitted.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Unaware of the conversation, Kunou continued gazing down at Kachiko. "Of course, no fair maiden such as yourself could be the mother of any child. Pristine and pure, you are like the driven snow, untouched and unsullied." He latched onto her hand, holding it up to his chest. "Can you feel it? My heart racing like the gentle beat of the birds as my eyes bask upon your beauteous form?"  
  
Kachiko stood motionless, her mouth agape.  
  
Kunou went from holding her hand to his chest, to clasping it in both his. He looked down at her, his eyes tearing as he said, "A fierce lioness of passion such as yourself is almost too much for my countenance to bear. Were I to be struck blind at this moment, I would be grateful, for it would mean the last sight I beheld on this earth would be you."  
  
He backed off, and looked forlorn at the sky. "Your Beauty. The Winds. The Oceans. My Passion. All the same: Relentless."  
  
"Was that poetry?" Kachiko asked as she stared at the youth in disbelief.  
  
"Nay, for there are no words that can do your beauty justice. All they might do is describe its effect upon me." He raised his bokken to the heavens. "I woke this morn without hope, but now I see that it was but the first day of the rest of my life, one to be filled with joyous rapture for all of my existence!" He grasped Kachiko firmly by the shoulders. "What say you to this, oh Angel of Elegance? Would you bless myself with your presence for eternity?"  
  
Ranma and Akane winced slightly as Kachiko drew back and said...  
  
"Oh wow! That's so cool. No one's ever made up poetry about me before. Oh sure, some guys try it, but all they manage to do is stumble over themselves and only get out 'You're cute' or something else that anyone can say. But you do it so well it's really sexy. And you're good-looking too. Do you have a girlfriend?"  
  
The reaction stunned Ranma and Akane as well as making them recoil in horror.   
  
"This can't be happening," Ranma said.  
  
"I refuse to believe it," Akane seconded.  
  
"She's setting him up to kick him in the balls or something."  
  
"No member of my family, especially not my mother, can possible think Kunou is anything but an idiot."  
  
"She can't think he's cute. She said she thought I was cute!" Ranma protested.  
  
Akane punched him in the head. "You're missing the point here! My mom thinks that idiot among idiots is attractive and datable material."  
  
"And she said she thinks I'm cute. Which means in her eyes Kunou is equal to me. Or worse, since she met him after me, that he's even cuter than me. I refuse to stand for that kind of insult!"  
  
That earned him another smack. "That's not what I'm saying, though I admit I can't understand it either. Think of it this way. Worst case scenario. Horror story stuff. Let's say they hit it off really well and things result in her... I can't believe I'm actually saying this, marrying him."  
  
Ranma shuddered. "That is horrible. Three Kunous in the world is more than enough."  
  
"It gets worse. And then you marry into our family. Three words for you: Father-in-law."  
  
Ranma held his hands to his head screamed at the top of his lungs.  
  
Akane trembled in rage. "Mom doesn't understand the situation. She's still disoriented from her time-travel. I can't let this atrocity happen. Not at any cost." Akane rushed forward to put a stop to things.  
  
Events between the two had gone far enough for Kunou to be gazing deep into Kachiko's eyes and saying, "I would date with you."  
  
Kachiko turned her head shyly away. "I'm not sure if I have any openings in my busy schedule. Let me-" she found her hand ripped out of Kunou's. "What are you doing?"  
  
"I can't let this farce go on anymore." Akane inserted herself between Kunou and the object of his ardor. "You stay away from her, Kunou, or so help me, you'll answer to me."  
  
Kunou brushed his hair back dramatically. "I see, fair Akane Tendou. You are jealous of the attentions I am lavishing upon your cousin, who is clearly not your mother. Fear not. There is room in my heart for you as well. I would date you both!"  
  
Akane gave him an uppercut that prevented him from embracing her.  
  
Kachiko looked at Akane curiously. "So, you're dating Kunou-chan too?"  
  
"Absolutely not!"  
  
"Then I can have him?"  
  
"Absolutely not!"  
  
"My, you're a greedy little thing, aren't you?"  
  
"I am not! I'm trying to save you from making a mistake."  
  
"What do you mean? Does he have some kind of communicable disease?"  
  
"No, at least, I don't think so. Stupidity isn't contagious. But you don't know him like I do. He's completely deluded."  
  
"Not that deluded. He thinks I'm attractive."  
  
"He's arrogant."  
  
"I like men that are a self-assured. It's the soft-spoken basketcases that bore me. Give me someone who's confident in himself any day of the week."  
  
"He won't take no for an answer."  
  
"I like persistent men. It means they're really interested in you instead of just passing the time away."  
  
"He's completely insincere. Sure, he says he likes you, but in the same breath he'll say he likes me and someone else. You heard him just now."  
  
"So he likes playing the field. I can respect that. There's no reason you can't date more than one person at the same time, unless you're serious about someone. Have you been on a date with him?"  
  
"Of course not!"  
  
"Then why would you expect him to chase only after you if you keep rejecting him?"  
  
"I don't want him to chase after me!"  
  
"Then why are you concerned about who he says he likes besides you?"  
  
"It's the principle involved."  
  
A man wearing a loud Hawaiian shirt and a palm tree on top of his head popped up between the girls. "Dat's right. I be involved since it be my Little Tachi we be talking about. Now, either of you little wahines want a tattoo?"  
  
Akane punted him far away. "Now is not the time for stupid puns."  
  
The other member of the Kunou family that was present quickly took his father's place. "Akane Tendou, there is no need for this jealousy. Your cousin, who is not your mother, is clearly not at fault, and it would pain me to be the cause of a rift between such close members of a family. As I said, I would be more than happy to date you both."   
  
His attempt to embrace them was interrupted as Ranma booted him in the head. "Knock it off, you jerk."  
  
Kachiko swooned. "Oh, now Ranma is acting jealous. I haven't been here a week and already I'm involved in a love triangle."  
  
"I am not jealous and there is no triangle!" Ranma protested.   
  
Kunou reappeared, brandishing his bokken. "Saotome, foul sorcerer. How dare you ensnare yet another woman in your fiendish grasp. Bad enough you have captured both Akane Tendou and the pig-tailed girl, but now you have the audacity to hold yet another who has been here but a handful of days. I will dispatch you and free all of them from your clutches."  
  
"Wow! Now they're fighting over us," Kachiko said in delight.  
  
"Not for long." Akane watched Kunou take a third hit in as many seconds.  
  
"I didn't say it was an even fight. It's the principle of the thing."  
  
The Principal appeared again. "You called."  
  
"Enough!" Both Akane and Kachiko bludgeoned him this time.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
It was between classes that Nabiki Tendou made her way through the school hallways, looking for one person in particular. Ordinarily, she could have taken her time with things, but after the events of the morning, the predictable misinterpretation of what had happened led nearly everyone to conclude that Ranma was not only involved with Akane, but Kachiko as well. Nabiki wondered how Ukyou took the news. Not that her interest was anything other than idle curiosity, but it might have made Ranma a touch more irritable than he was this morning. That would be good. Part of her plan involved Ranma reacting in his typical unthinking manner.  
  
Finally arriving at her destination, Nabiki knocked on the door and waited for the appropriate, "Come on in," before entering.  
  
Miss Hinako, in her younger form, was sitting in her chair. Chocolate marred her impish features as she put the candy bar she had been in the middle of ravenously devouring down. "What can I do for you, Miss Tendou?"  
  
Nabiki noted among the debris of the garbage can next to the desk a number of empty packages of pocky. A sugar high would make things ever easier. She made a show of appearing surprised. "I have to say, Miss Hinako, you're taking the news rather well."  
  
Hinako blinked. "News? What news?"  
  
Nabiki's 'surprise' doubled. "You mean you didn't hear?"  
  
That made Hinako rise to her feet. "Didn't hear what? Is it about a delinquent?" A coin suddenly appeared in Hinako's hand. She began adroitly flipping it between the fingers of one hand with a skill that belied her apparent age.  
  
"Ah, sort of." Nabiki shifted the conversation back on track. "I'm not sure if I should tell you this. It's not my place."  
  
"I'm a teacher. You can tell me anything. Are you pregnant? Does your father know?"  
  
"No!" Nabiki snapped. "It's about Daddy."  
  
Hinako's interest instantly doubled. "Soun-chan. What about Soun-chan?"  
  
Hearing Hinako speak her father's name in such a familiar way made even the usually stoic Nabiki wince. "Maybe it would be best if someone else told you."  
  
Hinako began tugging insistently on Nabiki's skirt. "Tell me! Tell me what's wrong with Soun-chan."  
  
With a hesitation that was reluctant only in the sense that she wanted to say it faster, Nabiki said, "Well, you know that new girl that transferred into my class today?"  
  
"She's your cousin, right?"  
  
"Well, this is sort of embarrassing to admit, but that's not entirely accurate. Actually, she's Daddy's wife."  
  
Hinako's coin fell from limp fingers. "Wife?"  
  
"Afraid so. If you ask him, he'd tell you he's married to her."  
  
"But, it can't be. He's still mourning your mother."  
  
"He's not the only one in mourning about her," Nabiki said acidly. She cleared her throat and regained control. "It appears Daddy likes them even younger than I guessed."  
  
"No! I refuse to believe Soun-chan would marry someone like that!"  
  
"After learning her personality firsthand, I'd like to refuse to believe it too, but it's the truth." Nabiki said. "You can check with Ranma for confirmation."  
  
Hinako decided to do just that as she picked up her coin and raced out of the room.   
  
Nabiki followed, a smirk on her features.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma was standing in the hall, trying desperately to figure out how to explain to everyone that he most assuredly was not engaged to Kachiko and that he was not monopolizing every girl that came to town, when a yellow blur appeared next to him.  
  
"Ah." He instinctively leaped up to a nearby light fixture. It took a moment for him to only calm semi-down, since it had been Hinako who had appeared, and that when she accosted him, it usually meant trouble. "What didn't I do, that you think I did do, and why did it make you want to try and drain me?"  
  
Hinako placed her hands on her oversized dress and pouted as only an eight-year old could. "This isn't about you and your delinquent ways, Mr. Saotome."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Is it true that Kachiko girl is Soun-chan's wife?"  
  
Ranma paled. Reflexively he said, "How did you find out about that? It's supposed to be a secret."  
  
Hinako began bawling her eyes out. "Waaa! It is true! It's not fair! I was only standing out of the way because Soun-chan was still mourning his wife! I was waiting for him to be ready to romance! But now some little delinquent got there first!"  
  
"Err, it's not exactly simple."  
  
Hinako was beyond hearing. She boldly proclaimed, "I will not stand for this!" and zoomed off as quickly as she appeared.   
  
"This is really bad," Ranma lamented.   
  
"Want a tattoo to make it better?"  
  
"Would you go away?!" Ranma booted the Principal out the nearest window.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko was busy answering the questions of her fellow students. The reactions weren't a surprise. They were pretty much the same thing in her day when a new girl came to school. All the other girls would feel her out for possible friendship or rivalry, and the guys would ask questions to see if she was acceptable dating material. It was nice to know that no matter how much things changed, human nature remained the same. That Kachiko was 'related' to Akane, who was fairly popular to begin with, only helped matters and made people inclined to like her.   
  
Of course it was lonely at the same time to be in such relatively familiar environs, and yet none of her old friends and acquaintances were there. In some ways it was like her home; a place where everyone she knew had been exchanged for a pack of strangers. It was times like this she really wished she could tell Sakura the truth. But it wouldn't be fair. Her best friend had made her peace with Kachiko's 'death'. Bringing up the old memories, especially when Sakura had her own life full of concerns, wouldn't be right. And in some ways, it would remind Kachiko of what she had lost as a result of the time trip. No, far better to abandon the hopes and plans of an out of reach past and go on to forge a new future with the material she had been dealt.   
  
And now there were so many more possibilities with the interesting Kunou, as well as Ranma, now vying for her attention. So much potential, and this was just the tip of the iceberg. It brought a smile to her face.  
  
"How dare you sit there and smile so smugly, you delinquent!"  
  
Kachiko turned to locate the speaker of such a high-pitched voice. She noticed all of the people that had been crowding around her had chosen to back away both from her and the person that had uttered the insult. "What's your problem, little girl?"  
  
"Ha! You call me a little girl, but I say it's you who's really little. I won't let you get away with this."  
  
Kachiko shifted uncomfortably at the vague insinuation. "Um, get away with what?"  
  
Hinako leveled an accusatory finger at Kachiko. "How dare you steal my man away, you delinquent. I had prior claim on him, and was only holding back because I knew if I tried to pressure him into something, it would've hurt him because he wasn't ready for a relationship, even if it is unhealthy to mourn for that long. And then I find out that you sneaked in and tried to take him out from under my nose. But I'll be generous today. I'll give you one chance to back off, or else you'll be sorry."  
  
Now Kachiko understood. It must have been some elementary school student that had a crush on Kunou. How sweet, in that annoying way only verminous little kids could muster. Snotty little loud-mouthed brats like this were exactly why Kachiko was not enthusiastic at the idea of having children. Still, she forced herself to be civil and reached forward to pat the girl on the head. "Now, now, little one. I think he's just a wee bit old for you. Why don't you run along and find some pre-schooler that's closer to your age?"  
  
Turning a deep shade of red, Hinako said, "So you openly admit you seduced him?"  
  
Kachiko primped her hair. "If you got it, flaunt it. Although I haven't settled on him. I might be interested in someone else instead. I'm a young gal, you know. I want to keep my options open."  
  
A strangling sound came from Hinako. "You... you're worse than a delinquent! You're a faithless slut!"  
  
Kachiko's temper snapped in an instant. "Excuse me, you sawed-off runt. I am not some tramp that puts out unless I'm firmly convinced I have met Mr. Right! And where do you get off trying to tell me who to date, you annoying little brat? Why don't you go get some Silly Putty, roll yourself into a ball, and scram?"  
  
A murmur of, "Was that supposed to be a humorous insult?" and "It wasn't funny," rumbled through the crowd.  
  
Now absolutely livid, Hinako pulled out a coin and softly intoned, "For not only being an unrepentant delinquent, as well as a slut that seduces older men away from women who are much better suited for them, but for that awful joke, you will face divine retribution!"  
  
Kachiko smirked and kicked back on her heels. "Look, kid, if you're trying to buy me off, it won't work. I'm not some-"  
  
"HAPPO-GOJUUEN SETSU !"  
  
Instantly Kachiko felt every ounce of energy sucked out of her body. Her flesh withered and muscles gave out as she was drained dry. All she could do was lay on the ground in a motionless heap, unable to do more than wonder exactly what just happened.   
  
At the same time, Hinako grew to her older form, filling out her now too short dress in every way. Now much taller than her 'rival',' she stood over the sack of emaciated flesh and stomped her heel on it, twisting her foot around. "I'm afraid you're that one that's bitten off more than she can chew, 'Little Girl.' If you think you can go around seducing men, marrying them, then toying with their hearts by seeking other men, you can think again. I'll steal him away from you, and show him what true love is all about. And if you try to get in the way, I'll drain you until all that's left is dust."  
  
Hinako turned once more on her heel, the one embedded in Kachiko, and stomped off.  
  
"Okay, that's a new one," the withered Kachiko weakly moaned.  
  
Nabiki came into Kachiko's view, bent low enough so that her face was less than half a foot away, and said in a voice dripping with delight, "That was your new English Teacher. She seems to think you're a rival for Daddy's affections. She doesn't respond well to rivals. Welcome to your first day at Furinkan High School. Hope you enjoy your stay."  
  
Kachiko merely lay there, concentrating on difficult things that took a lot of her remaining energy, like breathing. It was beginning to look like being run over by a car and settling down might not be such a bad thing after all.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
In case anyone was wondering, no, Kachi getting a harder time this chapter was not the result of people complaining about ANC syndrome. It was always going to turn out this way. It's whatever has the most humor potential at any given time, and the Hinako-Kachiko-Soun thing was planned from the beginning.  
  
Special thanks, as always, to  
The Apprentice  
Chris Horton.   
Eternal Lost Lurker  
Max M  
David Johnston  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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	6. The Things We Wish for chapter 6

The Things We Wish For...  
Chapter 5  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present, there's only the slight complication that she was plucked out of time at the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
xxxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi turned from the stove to watch her mother as she sat on the porch, fiddling with some device on her lap. For a change, Kachiko was wearing a shirt that reached down to her waistline. However, it was still highly risqué, since it was sleeveless and had a neckline that hung both loose and low. To make matters worse, the material was white, and Kachiko was obviously not wearing a bra underneath. If she was hit with an errant spray of water, an event that happened all too often at the Tendou household, the shirt would become semi-transparent, and then the whole world would be able to see...  
  
No. It was too shameful. The idea of her mother appearing out in public, even if it was within the confines of the house, in such a manner was almost too much for Kasumi to bear. Every day she prayed all of this was only a phase her mother was going through, and that at any moment she would come to her senses and start wearing something proper, like a dress or even a kimono, as casual wear around the house. Kachiko could choose something, anything, just so long as it wasn't so provocative. Mothers weren't supposed to act sexy. They were supposed to act like mothers. Mothers had husbands and therefore had no need to attract attention from members of the opposite sex. And Kachiko was a mother, no matter how much she denied it. She had to act more properly.  
  
As if in response to Kasumi's line of thought, Kachiko drank deeply from the bottle of beer next to her, gave a loud belch, and scratched at her breast. After a moment, she began cursing under her breath as she fiddled with the device again.  
  
It was like a nightmare, or at least an unpleasant dream. Her mother had never belched; Kasumi would have sworn to that. And if she had belched, she would have done it quietly, not loud enough to scare the birds out of the trees like that. It was almost as though Kachiko was getting worse, rather than better, when it came to her motherly traits returning.   
  
Perhaps Kasumi was jumping to conclusions. Perhaps her mother was really mentally all right, and her behavior was all a facade. Underneath the crude veneer, Kachiko Tendou's motherly nature was preparing to bubble to the surface. Kasumi watched her mother more closely.  
  
Kachiko picked her nose, then flicked what she had discovered out into the yard.   
  
That did it. 'Drastic Steps' had to be taken. Kasumi picked up the phone and dialed a number.  
  
"Auntie Nodoka? This is Kasumi. We have a problem here and I was wondering if you might come over. We need help teaching someone how to be a proper mother..."  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Come on, Tendou, old buddy. I'm telling you this plan can't fail."  
  
"I don't know." Soun looked indecisively at Kachiko from the cover of the door frame leading into the kitchen. Both he and Genma's heads barely stuck out beyond the edge of the frame, lest they be discovered and Kachiko grew angry at them for staring at her. As it was, she seemed content to look at the yard, her head swaying back and forth slightly.  
  
Genma said, "Women are always babbling about how they want men to speak up and tell them they love them. She's a woman. Obviously from the way she's dressing she wants a man to come on to her. She's just begging for some suave Casanova to walk up and sweep her off her feet. And that, my friend, is you."  
  
"Every time I touch her, she hits me."  
  
"Ah, yes," Genma considered that. "Maybe it would be best to verbally sweep her off her feet. Women prefer talk to direct action. Like Nodoka used to say, if it was up to men, our idea of courtship would be to simply find a woman we consider attractive, hit her on the head, and drag her off to do with her as we will. I actually did that to my wife once. Not hit her, of course, but dragged her off and had my way with her. She rather liked it. I think she's been hinting at me to do it again."  
  
"I don't think that would work. Kachi-chan's a very good martial artist. I'm fairly certain she's better than me."  
  
"Hmm. Perhaps after you dazzle her with your tongue, she'll hit you on the head and drag you off. She seems rather liberated in that way."  
  
"Yes, much more than before. She's changed so much, and yet, she's still the same. And this aggressiveness of hers, while it's not bad, I'm not sure I like it either. It makes things exciting, but at the same time scary as well. I don't know what to do or how to deal with this." Soun began wringing his hands in worry.  
  
Genma gave an affectionate pat on Soun's shoulder. "That's right. Your judgment is skewed, since this is such an emotional issue for you. That's why you need to leave it to me, who can use his unbiased sentiments and superior judgment to help resolve this matter. Just go out there and tell her your feelings. The worst she can do is reject you again." Genma looked at Kachiko again, then added. "And hit you really hard. But she's already doing that, so it's not like it would be a move down for you or an indication that she dislikes you more than she already does."  
  
"Saotome, you are not helping matters."  
  
"Quit hesitating. Show some spine. You're becoming as indecisive as the boy. Get out there." Genma shoved his friend forward.   
  
Soun tentatively took a few steps forward. He noted that Kasumi had already left the kitchen, so he and Kachiko would be alone now, save for Genma's hidden presence. Kachiko didn't seem openly hostile to anything at the moment. It probably was Soun's best chance to tell his wife his feelings so he could win her heart all over again.  
  
Yearning for his long lost wife, Soun founding a bit more backbone as he quietly made his way through the kitchen until he was on the periphery of the porch, a mere handful of feet behind Kachiko's sitting form. She had not reacted to his presence. Her back remained to him as she continued facing the yard, her head still slightly swaying back and forth for no apparent reason.  
  
Falling to his knees, Soun gave up all pretenses and blurted out feelings that had been bottled up for so long. "Kachi-chan. I've come to confess my love for you. For over a decade I've done nothing but feel an ache in my heart since you left us for a better place. Every morning I woke up, the days seemed darker, even with our wonderful girls at my side. They weren't enough. They weren't you. I tried to soldier on as best as I could, but your absence made me ache in a way I can't begin to describe. I have never stopped loving you. Not for one moment. And now you stand before me again, a dream I never thought possible. But you don't know me. And it hurts almost as much as if you were still gone. I can't tolerate this situation any longer. I have to let you know how I feel."  
  
Kachiko, head still swaying as she continued staring out at the yard, said, "I know you want me."  
  
"I have made it rather obvious," Soun admitted.   
  
Kachiko said, "Well, I want you too... oo."  
  
Soun's eyes nearly bulged out of his head. "You do?"  
  
"So let's throw down and show this town what two hot lovers can do...oo."  
  
"Oh my love!" Soun wailed as he grabbed Kachiko from behind and embraced her.  
  
Kachiko stiffened, she looked over her shoulder, identified the person latched onto her, and began madly twitching. She easily broke out of Soun's grasp, spun around, and roared, "Don't you ever give up, you disgusting pervert?!" One earthshattering punch sent the wailing man high into the sky and out of sight.  
  
Kachiko's blood was still boiling as Nabiki entered the kitchen and said, "Hey, has anyone seen my... there it is." She walked over to her mother and snatched the CD player, dangling from Kachiko's head by its earphones, away from her. She waved the object in front of the girl. "You didn't ask if you could borrow this."  
  
"Only because you would have charged me."  
  
Nabiki couldn't argue with that. "Anything of mine you want, you ask if you can use it first, and I'll tell you the rates if I choose to loan it to you."  
  
"Oh, really?" Kachiko gained a wicked gleam in her eye. "Does that mean you'd rent me that long, cylindrical, battery-powered object you have stashed in the back of your sock drawer?"  
  
That made Nabiki freeze. Slowly, she said, "If the price was right."  
  
"And how much would my silence about its existence be worth?"  
  
Grimacing, Nabiki handed her the CD player. "You give it back the minute you're done, and it better not have so much as a scratch on it or you buy me a new one."  
  
Letting out a low-pitched snicker, Kachiko held out her hand and said, "Deal."  
  
As Nabiki looked at the hand, she found herself overwhelmed by a sense of deja-vu. Except the dimensions were off. The hand should have been bigger, able to completely encompass Nabiki's own. And she should have been looking up at it. And on the back of the ring finger...  
  
Nabiki grabbed Kachiko's hand and turned it over. There was a faded scar, half a centimeter in length, on the middle knuckle.  
  
"You could be more polite when you do that," Kachiko complained as she removed her hand from Nabiki's.   
  
Nabiki couldn't hear it. She didn't want to. Instead she gave Kachiko a haunted look, turned, and walked out of the kitchen, Kachiko's words about trying to be a better sport when being outmaneuvered ignored. Nabiki felt an upsurge of emotion that threatened to overwhelm her. With grim determination, she forced it back down into the depths it had dared to rise up from.  
  
"You're not my mother. I hate you," Nabiki hissed under her breath as she entered her bedroom and slammed the door behind her.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane had dropped by her 'former' bedroom, to check on her mother. Much to her surprise, the woman in question was standing in front of a full length mirror, decked out in a surprisingly pleasing white dress that looked as though it had come straight out of Kasumi's closet. The skirt reached down to the ankles and there was no neckline to speak of. It reminded Akane of how her mother used to dress when she was still alive.   
  
"You look nice," Akane said.  
  
"Do you think so?" Kachiko spun around.   
  
"Definitely. You should dress like that more often."  
  
"Nah, it's only for this special occasion."  
  
That made Akane's warning senses rise. "And just what is this 'special occasion'?"   
  
Kachiko continued admiring herself in the mirror. "Kasumi told me Ranma's mother is coming to visit me. I want to make a good first impression. They say how you react when you first meet a person dictates how the relationship will go."  
  
Now Akane was really suspicious. "Why would she want to visit you?"  
  
"Probably because she wants to meet the girl who might someday become her future daughter-in-law."  
  
Akane made a strangling noise. "Ranma hasn't chosen you."  
  
Before Akane could fully start her diatribe, Kachiko cut her off. "And I haven't settled on him for sure either, which is why I said 'might'. There's still plenty of time, and if I decide he's not a keeper, I'll let you have him. Kasumi's no threat, since I'm beginning to think she has no interest in guys, and there's no way I'm giving him to Nabiki. No one deserves that."   
  
"You're too kind," Akane said dryly.   
  
Kachiko placed a finger to her chin in thought. "You know, that's something no one ever accuses me of."  
  
"I find that very easy to believe."  
  
The sound of a knock on the front door reached the upstairs bedroom. Employing a speed only seen when Happosai homed in on a girl's breasts, Kachiko was out of the room and at the front door before Akane had made it to the top of the stairs. Kachiko took one moment to double-check her appearance, patting down the skirt so not a wrinkle could be seen. Satisfied with the results, she opened the door.   
  
Standing on the front porch was the familiar form of Genma. Next to him was a woman who was just a touch on the tall side, with red hair tied in a bun and wearing a traditional kimono. The resemblance to Ranma's female half was unmistakable.   
  
Nodoka bowed. "You must be Kachiko. Kasumi told me all about you. You look very much like Akane. It's an honor to meet you."  
  
Kachiko bowed back, then gave a large toothy grin that caused Nodoka to flinch. "Actually, Akane looks like me," Kachiko corrected. "And there's no need to be so formal. You can call me Kachi. Although I must confess, I'm surprised by your presence here."  
  
"You mean Kasumi didn't tell you I was coming?" Nodoka asked.   
  
Kachiko shook her head, then began looking past Nodoka. "Apparently she didn't tell me everything. I was only expecting Ranma's mother. They didn't tell me his grandmother was coming along too. Is your daughter around?"   
  
Nodoka froze like a deer caught in the path of oncoming headlights. It took a moment for her to snap out of her stupor and find her voice. "I beg your pardon. I am Ranma's mother."  
  
Kachiko stopped looking around and gave a wide-eyed stare at Nodoka. "Wow! No kidding." She nudged Genma in the ribs. "Guess you got a thing for older women, eh?"  
  
"I'm a year younger than him!"   
  
"It doesn't show."  
  
By that time, Akane had made it to the doorway. Having heard the remarks and catching the gist of the conversation, she was reluctant to intrude, but now she walked up to her mother's side. She was going to pleasantly greet Nodoka and try to defuse the situation when she saw that that the normally unflappable woman's right eyebrow was twitching uncontrollably. Nodoka's resemblance to Ranma when his temper was frayed was far more noticeable than ever before.  
  
Kachiko, oblivious to the effect of her words, continued. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. My Mom had me later in life as well. You were what, thirty-five when you had Ranma?"  
  
"I'm thirty-five now!"  
  
A derisive snort escaped Genma's lips. He was instantly made sorry by the evil stare that was unleashed upon him. Almost as though he was reading lines, badly, he stated, "That's right. My wife is only thirty-five."  
  
"I'd never have guessed," Kachiko assured her.  
  
Akane laughed nervously. "Maybe we should go inside?"  
  
The attempt to settle things down failed miserably as Nodoka stood her ground, an anger never witnessed before clearly evident. "I don't believe this. You can't possible be the mother to the delightful girls that live here. You are an unbelievably rude, uncouth, obnoxious little girl that should be locked away in some sort of reform school, if not jail outright!"  
  
The insults finally awakened Kachiko's own anger. "Excuse me. You don't even know me. Don't take the fact you don't age well out on me, Hag."  
  
"I am not a hag, you insulting little wench," Nodoka spluttered. "Teach you how to be more motherly? Ha! I doubt I could even teach you proper manners."  
  
Kachiko's voice dropped into a much more controlled state, which was far more frightening than her previously angry tone. "Wait a minute. I thought you were coming by to feel me out as Ranma's fiancee."  
  
"Ranma's fiancee? I'd prefer not having grandchildren at all to allowing you to spawn them."  
  
Kachiko's voice was like ice. "So, someone asked you to come down here to teach me how to be... motherly." She turned to Akane.  
  
Sensing the impending violence, Akane held up her hands in a warding gesture. "It wasn't me. I didn't know she was coming until you mentioned it." Akane was thankful her survival instincts were honed sharply enough to prevent her from saying the rest of what was on her mind, 'You could use both the lessons on manners as well as motherhood.' Akane was under the impression her mother considered corporal punishment the first option rather than the last.  
  
Kachiko spun in fury on Nodoka. "I'll have you know something. If the price for becoming a mother meant turning out like you, I'd rather die in that car crash."   
  
Before Nodoka could retort, Kachiko leaped up onto a fence and used it as a springboard to a nearby rooftop. Without any further obstructions, other than chimneys, she quickly dashed off and out of sight.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"That went really well." Kachiko kicked an empty can someone had discarded on the sidewalk.  
  
Having come down to street level near a busy road in the shopping district, Kachiko had cooled off enough to think about what had happened. Maybe the argument was a tiny bit her fault, jumping to conclusions like that. Maybe there were times she tended to speak her mind before thinking. But Nodoka had overreacted. It was an honest mistake. She was certain there was someone out there that thought the woman looked young; but that person wasn't Kachiko.   
  
Perhaps Kachiko wasn't the best judge of ages above thirty. It wasn't like she gave it much consideration. Once a person hit thirty, it was all downhill from there as far as she was concerned. And she certainly had no interest in anyone over the age of thirty. That was way too old to be a friend or romantic interest, in her opinion. So why would someone in their thirties care if a person made a guess at their age and it was five or ten years off? At that point it didn't matter anymore. It was splitting hairs. Old was old.   
  
Kachiko kicked the can again. Maybe an empty apology would cool the old lady down. It wasn't like Kachiko had intended to insult her; it just happened. Surely one unintentional insult couldn't be held against her.   
  
But then there was the revelation of Nodoka's true purpose in wanting to meet Kachiko. "Jerks!" she spat as she kicked the can out of sight. Once again her wonderful 'family' was trying to fit her into a mold they wanted rather than the one Kachiko was already in. Lover to some forty-year old (maybe thirty-five, but it was the same difference). Settling down and being a mother to three teenagers, one of which was older than her. Tending a home for a living. Who in their right mind would want that at the age of seventeen? Not Kachiko Tendou. She had plans. She was young, in perfect health, and wanted to have the good time her parents seemed perpetually bent on denying her. Time enough for the responsibilities and raising a family much later, when there was nothing better to look forward to. The most important thing in her life right now would be getting into a good college, and that was still a year away.   
  
But none of that mattered to her new 'family.' Kachiko despised the way everyone looked at her. To them she wasn't a vivacious seventeen-year old girl in the spring of her youth; she was some resurrected paragon of motherhood. They were seeing what they wanted, not what was really there. It didn't matter how much Kachiko protested, they merrily ignored it or pretended to listen, all the while formulating a plan to make her into the image they had permanently burned in their minds. Kachiko Tendou was going to be their mother.   
  
Like hell she was.   
  
At least Ranma wasn't like that. When he looked at her, he saw her for what she was. There were no unrealistic expectations. She was just another person. He wasn't uneasy around her, or at least not uneasy in that 'should I look up to you and ask your advice, oh mother of mine?' sort of manner. He was still a bit skittish around her, but she knew she could bring him around in time. Hell, surrounded by that lot of nutjobs, (not to mention an old mother who was obviously pathological about her age) she was surprised Ranma was as relatively normal as he was. Kachiko wasn't making it any easier on him. She was just a bit on the touchy side lately with all the different forces arrayed against her, constantly fighting her desires. And worse, she had a terrible feeling they weren't going to give up easily. They had brought Kachiko through time to be at their side for one reason only, and it seemed unlikely reality would hold any sway over them.  
  
"I didn't ask to be dragged here!" Kachiko raged. Sure, maybe they had done her a favor by keeping her from ending up roadkill. If that really was her fate, she would have lost the world she knew anyway and was glad for being here, especially since she still had her martial arts. But there were doubts. Maybe they were wrong. Maybe that was only one possible outcome. Maybe Kachiko Tendou wasn't destined to be run over a couple of times, ending up crippled then killed. Maybe she and Sakura would not have fought and ruined their friendship. And maybe Kachiko would have stayed in touch with all her friends from high school. And still had a family that, while also trying to break her into a role she had no desire to fulfill, wasn't as terrifying as what the people she now lived with were trying to force onto her.  
  
The world itself wasn't bad. Kachiko had gotten enough of a feel for the world of the future to say that. She actually liked the environment. Left on her own long enough, she wagered she could have made new friends and returned to her normal state of life. It wasn't all that different from moving to somewhere far away. School had transfer students all the time, and they adjusted well enough. As to all of the changes the future had brought, Kachiko found herself in favor of the majority of ones she had become aware of. Japan of twenty years ago was not particularly favorable towards women. While it was obvious in this 'present' that men still called all the shots, things had lightened up considerably, and they would only get better with time. There were other things that threw Kachiko off, and she found she was still adjusting to the changes around her, but it was happening. The only thing truly making her miserable were those people determined to call her mother. But in some ways, that alone was making everything bad. No matter what good things might be around her, the unrelenting pressure they leveled against her made everything worse. As it stood now, the bad came close to outweighing the good.  
  
Nothing but insufferable situations surrounded Kachiko. She had her choice of bad fates: young mother or corpse. Well, she was going to avoid both those options, even if it took every ounce of force she could gather. She would make new friends, get a good boyfriend, and become normal, no matter what everyone else wanted.   
  
The whole situation was irritating enough to make her want to tear her hair out by the roots. She wanted something else to kick. Anything short of a small animal would do. Ideally, Ranma's mother's flabby backside would serve..  
  
Kachiko spotted another can, and was preparing to punt it somewhere over Hokkaido, when she caught a quick movement out of the corner of her eye. She turned and saw a small boy, at least a couple years younger than that Hinako girl's young form, dart out between two parked cars and into the road as he chased a bright red bouncing ball. The child's attention was riveted on the object, making him completely unaware of the car that was barreling down upon him. The driver was likewise unaware of the child, since his concentration was reserved for the phone in his hand that he was shouting into. The driver's speed remained constant and direction unwavering as he traveled well over the speed limit on his collision course with the child.  
  
"Stupid brat!" Kachiko snarled as she tensed up to make a running leap and tackle the child out of the path of the car.  
  
Just as Kachiko's muscles tensed, she froze. It was suddenly perfectly clear. She knew what was going to happen. This was Fate, like Sakura had spoken of. History was repeating itself, even if Kachiko herself had not been through it yet. Somehow she knew that if she went out into the street, she would be the one hit by the car and injured badly enough she would have to give up martial arts. Crippled, she would have no choice but to cave in to the others' demands, becoming the mother they wanted and marrying a man twice her age. Fate, Sakura said, could not be denied.  
  
But that was a lie. Kachiko could avoid her fate by staying away from the road and not getting hit. The car couldn't even go out of control at the last minute and hit her since there was a parked dump truck between her and the speeding vehicle. She was safe right where she was. Healthy, practicing martial arts, single, and with no offspring to take care of. All she had to do was stand motionless and let the young child take her place. It wouldn't be her fault. Not helping someone was not the same thing as endangering them. She bore no responsibility to help a stranger, especially at such a great cost to herself. She wasn't making a choice. She was just letting things happen as they would have had she not been pulled from time. Fate was pulling all the strings, but it would not make her bend to its demands. She'd cheat it by not playing its game.   
  
It took a split second for those myriad of emotions and thoughts to shoot through Kachiko. Decision made, her body flew into motion. One powerful leap and she was in the air, her extensive training allowing her mind to tune out everything but her target: the child. The car was still there, but it was like a force of nature, not something Kachiko could affect. All that mattered was the child's safety.  
  
Kachiko's body impacted with the child's and she grabbed hold of him. She was still hurtling through the air as her eyes filled with tears and she found her mind filled with nothing but regrets. It was so stupid, throwing away everything but the breath from her body for some stranger's child. She didn't even like kids. After the last few days, she had learned to loathe them and their expectations. And with the way her luck had been going, the kid she was saving would probably grow up to become a serial killer. Or an annoying high school principal. His survival would probably make everyone's lives miserable, not better.  
  
There was a screech of tires as Kachiko's body continued hurtling through the air, twisting so she would absorb the brunt of the impact and spare the child. But rather than her course being interrupted by an impact, she continued on. She was almost in the other lane when she felt the car's fender strike the bottom of her foot. Not with bonebreaking force, but hard enough to let her know it would feel sore for some time.   
  
And then Kachiko landed in the lane, again twisting so she bore the brunt of the fall rather than her burden. Her momentum stopped and she came to a rest on her back in the middle of the lane. She couldn't move at first. It was almost too much to believe. She wasn't crippled. The car had barely grazed her. She might have a sprained ankle at the worst.   
  
Kachiko sat up with the still shocked child in her arms. She pumped her first in the air and shouted, "Hey, Fate! You want to know something?! I cheated your ass! Do you hear me?! You didn't win! I did!"  
  
The sound of a madly blasting horn drowned Kachiko out. She looked back down to see the grill of a truck barreling down at her in the lane she was currently sitting in.  
  
Rather than tensing up, Kachiko's body completely relaxed as she stared at the vehicle and said in a calm and collected voice, "Oh, !#$% youUHF!"  
  
The wind was knocked out of her lungs as something hit her hard in the side, scooped her and the child in her arms up in one motion, then vaulted up in the air. Kachiko could feel the wind kicked up from the truck passing underneath her.  
  
She only had enough time to blink twice before reaching the height of the leap and falling back down to earth. The landing was feather light, as she found herself held in another's arms in almost the same manner that she was holding the child.  
  
"Ra... Ranma."  
  
Their savior released his grip, setting Kachiko down on her feet. "Geez, what are you, stupid? You don't sit in the middle of the street, shouting at the sky and wait for somebody to run over you."  
  
Kachiko released her hold on the child in the same way that Ranma had set her down. "You saved me."  
  
"Of course I did. I wasn't going to let you get run over and get hurt or nothing."  
  
Kachiko unleashed a adoring gaze upon him. "Your presence here can only mean one thing."  
  
"It can?"  
  
"Yes. It means you're stalking me." Kachiko swooned.  
  
"I am not stalking you! I only followed you because Akane said you got in a fight with Mom and I wanted to make sure you were all right."  
  
"Then you do care."  
  
Ranma began fidgeting, looking downward as he found the ground much more settling than the gaze Kachiko was giving him. "It's just I don't like it when people fight, and I could tell it was bad because Mom was really fuming."  
  
Kachiko's gaze switched from that of a soft, rescued maiden to one of an aggressive predator. "You're my hero. You saved me from a fate worse than death. And since you're the hero, you get a reward."  
  
"Reward?" Ranma suddenly found a pair of arms wrapped around his neck. Kachiko drew him closer and downward to her own expecting lips. Caught off-guard, Ranma stiffened up rather than trying to escape, Kachiko's resemblance to Akane throwing him off further.   
  
Kachiko closed her eyes, puckered up, and said, "Argh! What do you think you're doing, you little bastard?!"  
  
The little boy she had rescued scowled at her before continuing to stomp on her sore foot. "You made me lose my ball, you ugly old woman!"  
  
Kachiko darted her tender foot away from the stomping child. "Why you obnoxious brat! I nearly lost my life for rescuing your sorry little behind and you have the nerve to whine to me about losing your ball? I have half a mind to toss you back out in the street!"  
  
The threat had no effect on the child as he aimed for her foot again. It appeared he was about to say more about Kachiko's appearance, when a woman's voice cried out, "Hiroyoshi!"  
  
The child's anger turned instantly to tears. Hiroyoshi ran up to his mother and into her arms.  
  
"What happened?" the mother asked.  
  
Hiroyoshi rubbed his eyes, sniffled, then leveled an accusatory finger at Kachiko. "That woman touched my bottom in a way that made me uncomfortable."  
  
Kachiko waved her fist at him. "You little !#$%. I only grabbed you because I was in a hurry to keep you from getting run over! I didn't have enough time to be choosy about where my hands ended up!"  
  
The child's false tears doubled. The mother shot Kachiko a look that promised something worse than mere crippling at the hands of a semi as she shouted, "Help, help! My child has been molested!"  
  
Instantly a group of men appeared from a side-street and ran up to the woman. They were all at least six feet in height and had muscles that indicated half their lives took place in a gym. They all wore matching blue uniforms, red berets, and wide belts with a variety of unpleasant looking items dangling from them.   
  
The largest of the men stepped forward and said the mother. "Did youse say youse spotted a molester? Where is da bum?"  
  
The mother pointed to Kachiko. "That evil girl just tried to molest my son!"  
  
"Did not!" Kachiko protested.  
  
"You just admitted you fondled his bottom."  
  
"I didn't fondle it. I only grabbed it when I picked him up."  
  
Ranma slapped his hand across his eyes and shook his head pitifully.  
  
The acting spokesman for the squad shot Kachiko an evil glare. "We gotta nice clean neighborhood here, and we'd like ta keep it dat way. Which is why me and da boys got together and formed Da Combat Legion Against Perverts ta fight off twisted scum like youse."  
  
Kachiko gave him a half-lidded stare. "Let me get this straight. You're calling yourselves The CLAP? What kind of morons are you to pick a dumb name like that?"  
  
The man detached a baton from his belt. Sparks of electricity leapt from the tip as the device crackled noisily. "We're da morons dat was formally members of da special forces and got da firepower and combat training ta beat up perverts like youse. Okay, guys, let's bring some law and order back to dis district!"  
  
The rest of the men pulled out identical weapons, gave a roar of challenge, and charged Kachiko and Ranma.  
  
"But it's really not my fault!" she wailed.   
  
"That one never works," Ranma informed her as the fight began.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma and Kachiko trudged home, a touch the worse for wear after their encounter with the anti-pervert squad. They walked in silence, only twitching occasionally from the lingering touch of electricity.   
  
Tired of the silence, Ranma said, "You didn't do too badly back there."  
  
"You got three more than me. You're pretty good," Kachiko admitted.   
  
Much to Ranma's surprise, Kachiko didn't use the comment to engage in conversation. "You're being pretty quiet."  
  
"Yep."   
  
Again there was nothing. On some level, Ranma considered it a challenge to try to get her to open up. He continued, "How come?"  
  
"Ranma, do you know what tact is?"  
  
"No."  
  
Kachiko released a tired sigh. "I was just thinking to myself."  
  
"About them accusing you of being a pervert? Don't worry about it. I know you were only grabbing that kid to save him, not molest him. Right?"  
  
"Of course that was the only reason I grabbed him!"  
  
"I know. I was just kidding." Ranma found his right hand twitching slightly. He waited for the tremor to abate before continuing. "It took a lot of guts to run in front of that car like that and save the kid. I mean, with you knowing what happened to you, or almost happened if you hadn't been pulled to here."  
  
Kachiko shrugged it off. "Momentary lapse in judgment. I'll try to keep it from happening again."  
  
Ranma said, "You're being too cynical."  
  
Kachiko scoffed. "Trust me. If there's one thing I've learned from life, it's that selfless acts usually result in you getting a kick to the gut, not some reward for taking the high road. If you want something, you'd better be prepared to make a grab for it using everything you got, or you'll lose to someone willing to go that extra distance."  
  
Ranma was surprised by the bitterness in Kachiko's voice. He was torn between wanting to find out why she felt that way and taking the much more traveled course of minding his own business. Generally speaking, when he stuck his nose into matters, it tended to get bitten. Still, there was something about the harshness in her voice that felt like her observations were from a personal experience rather than an abstract one. It didn't sound like a fresh wound, but more like something from a while ago that still nagged at her from time to time. Ranma recognized the feeling because he felt the same way about certain matters, like the Cat-Fist. He'd gotten over the worst of it a long time ago, but mention the word cat in his presence, and it would be there again, annoying him like an itch that could never be scratched.   
  
They arrived at the house before Ranma could come to a decision. He let the matter drop, convinced Kachiko wouldn't want to talk about it in front of others, and that his interest might be misinterpreted by everyone else as something other than casual. Best to forget about the whole thing rather than allow it the chance to further complicate his life.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Nodoka heard her son return. She had been against him searching after the awful young girl who the others insisted was Soun's wife magically returned from the dead. Nodoka couldn't see how that was possible. Not the resurrection -when one had a son who turned into a girl periodically such things were easy to accept- it was the idea that Kachiko could be their mother. She was nothing like any of the girls that were supposedly her daughters, and certainly not how Akane and the others had described her when Nodoka had spoken to them in the past about the matter. It defied her sensibilities.   
  
Still, Kasumi had been insistent that Kachiko had been acting strangely since her journey through time, and Nodoka supposed being hurled twenty years into the future could be somewhat disturbing. She tried envisioning how she would have reacted had she been plucked out of the past as a teenager and thrust into her current role. She would have had a very manly husband in Genma. A man among men as a son. Grandchildren on the horizon. A role as a mother in a child's life. It was everything she wanted when she had graduated high school. It would have been the perfect setting. So why on Earth would Kachiko act so negatively about finding herself thrust in such an ideal situation as existed in the Tendou household? It made no sense.  
  
Nodoka decided that Kasumi was right, and that Kachiko was disoriented. She should be given another chance. Her rude comments could be discarded, or at least ignored for the while, and they could try starting off on the right foot once again.  
  
Nodoka waited until the pair came into the living room. She gasped upon seeing the state they were in. Much of their hair stood on end and singe marks covered large portions of their bodies. "What happened to you?"  
  
Kachiko gave a dismissive wave of her hand. "Nothing. Oh, I want to apologize for my comments from before. They were very insensitive."  
  
Caught off-guard by the apology, Nodoka said, "That's all right, dear. These things happen." She decided to extend a peace offering of her own. "Why don't we start all over? There's no reason to waste time. We can begin your first lesson in housekeeping right now."  
  
Instantly Kachiko's demeanor changed. The look in her eyes switched to a sort of empty stare. "That's awfully nice of you to offer. I'd really like to learn how to properly sew sweaters, prepare tea, and vacuum my brain, but I fear I have homework to do so I can educate myself and have a productive future. Perhaps later, when I've become too old and tired to remember what having fun is like, I'll take you up on your offer. Bye-bye." Kachiko skipped off, humming merrily to herself.  
  
Nodoka's eyebrow twitched again. She turned to Ranma, who had tried to slink off. It was times like this she noted his tendency to reflect some of his father's less manly attributes. "Ranma, exactly what happened while you were gone with that girl?"  
  
Ranma relaxed, obviously delighted about not receiving a more accusatory interrogation. "Nothing, really. We had a little problem with The CLAP is all."  
  
Nodoka felt her heart stop in her chest momentarily. "You and that girl... had a problem with... the clap?"  
  
"Yeah, but it wasn't anything a few good shots couldn't take care of." Ranma smiled smugly.  
  
Nodoka's mind recoiled and a wave of nausea swept over her. Certainly she had wanted her son to be manly, she had been insistent on that, but not with that sort of girl. Never mind what Kachiko represented to Akane and the others. And to learn that the young woman could have such a disease and given it to Ranma, it was all almost too much for her to handle. "Ranma, I'm certain you engaged in what you thought was proper conduct. And I understand you're an.... energetic young man. But couldn't you have used some sort of protection?"  
  
Ranma scratched his head and fingered one of the singe marks. "You mean like rubber or something?"  
  
"Yes! That's exactly what I mean. One of those."  
  
"It's not like I had any with me."  
  
Nodoka winced. "Damn it! I thought your father would have taught you not to do that sort of thing unprotected."  
  
"Well, yeah, he did sort of teach me to be prepared for anything," Ranma admitted. "But it kind of happened on the spur of the moment. If I had thought I was going to be dealing with The CLAP beforehand, I would have made sure I had some on me."  
  
Nodoka was in almost tears. "But it's too late now."  
  
"Obviously," Ranma agreed.  
  
"But you said you and Kachiko took care of the matter?"  
  
"Yeah. The CLAP won't be giving us problems any time soon."  
  
"Thank goodness," she sighed. "Ranma, I think it best not to mention this to anyone, especially Akane and the others."  
  
Ranma shrugged. "Well, okay. If you think it's a good idea, I'll keep quiet about it. I'll admit it wasn't exactly one of my proudest moments. And Akane might think I'm a pervert if I told her I had to deal with The CLAP."  
  
"Yes, given her nature, I can practically guarantee it." Akane did have some odd ideas when it came to what defined manliness.  
  
"Then I won't mention it," Ranma promised. "But at least I know I wasn't the cause of the problem this time."  
  
"No, the fault does not lie with you," Nodoka assured him. It was obvious that Kachiko girl had seduced him, and away from her own daughter no less. What sort of a mother was she to engage in such behavior, even if Ranma was a true man among men? It was shameless. And obviously her son wasn't the first she had given her favors to if she carried sexually transmitted diseases. "Ranma, you must tell me something. Do you plan to marry Kachiko?"  
  
"Heck no!"  
  
"Thank goodness." Nodoka doubted if she could have approved of a such a pairing. She stated firmly, "You must be more careful in the future. I'll be sure to get you some rubbers before the next time."  
  
"Aw, come on Mom."  
  
"No buts. You'll need the protection."  
  
"Fine," Ranma said in the tone all children used when their parents were acting overprotective. Now tired of the interrogation and lecture, he exited the room.  
  
Nodoka was left to ponder the situation. As much as she wanted to order Ranma not to fornicate with Kachiko further, she held back. She remembered her days in high school and what the boys Ranma's age were like. Once they found a girl they started to sleep with, they became hormonally driven machines that ignored the sound advice of their parents. Any attempts to forbid them from seeing the girl always failed miserably and simply built up resentment in the family, sometimes to the point where they would run off with their lover. There was no way Nodoka was willing to drive Ranma to that. He had already been gone for over a decade. Never again would she and her son be parted.  
  
It was like Nodoka's mother had said, men's lower anatomy did their thinking for them. And Ranma was technically of the age where he could decide such matters. Since he said he had no intention of marrying Kachiko, it was obvious he was just using her as a release for his teenage ardor. Nodoka would just have to accept the situation and hope he got the urge to sow his oats out of his system before the others found out. At least he had the sense to not engage in such behavior in the house. Although Nodoka would be confronted with the arduous task of covering up for the pair, which was going to be difficult. This sort of thing could conceivably tear apart the promise to unite the families, and Nodoka wanted grandchildren as soon as possible. She was a mother. She would simply have to accept the situation and protect Ranma as best as she could, even if it meant going out of her way to stomach that irresponsible girl.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko eased back in the bath until her head was almost underwater, enjoying the hot soak as it loosened her tense, electrocuted muscles. The CLAP hadn't been too problematic. Alone they might have given her a hard time, but with Ranma at her side, defeating them had been relatively easy. They didn't do any lasting damage, though the number of times she was hit with their stubby cattle prods left her a bit twitchy. What was the world coming to when packs of vigilantes were allowed to roam around and stir fry innocent young girls while accusing them of being child molesters? In her day, all they had to deal with were packs of giant mutant alligators that occasionally rose up from the sewers and tried to overthrow humanity. And that was only because Principal Faust used the sewers as a dumping ground for the radioactive waste material from the nuclear power plant in his secret underground lair.  
  
It was sad to see how badly the neighborhood had deteriorated since her day.   
  
Kachiko heard the door to the bath slide open, then close. She wondered who would wander into the bathroom while she was enjoying her soak? One of the girls? That annoying old woman? The old pervert? That was the one she truly dreaded. He had already managed one good grope today. She'd really beat the hell out of him this time if he tried molesting her in the bath.  
  
Or maybe it was Ranma. True, it seemed unlikely, but perhaps their bonding experience from this afternoon had convinced him she was the one for him. That presented a problem. She didn't think they were far enough along in their relationship to allow him to wash her back, or do naughtier things if he felt so inclined. She didn't want to dissuade him from chasing her, but she had to draw a line somewhere. But maybe he was finally acting aggressive. Maybe her femininity had proven too much for him to resist.   
  
Or maybe she had simply forgotten to hang the occupied sign on the door.  
  
"Damn! And it was such a fun fantasy, too," she growled in frustration.  
  
As Kachiko simmered in the bath, she heard an unusual sound, almost like a soft, rapid clicking rather than footsteps. The noise grew louder as whatever it was drew near the furo. She cautiously raised her head out from the water and looked over the side of the tub to identify the intruder.   
  
It was a little piglet with a yellow and black striped bandanna tied around its neck.   
  
Kachiko made a cooing sound. "Oh, you must be Akane's pet pig. She told me about you. You're even cuter than she said. Come to Kachi, Little Piggy." She stood up and curled her finger in a 'Come here' gesture to the piglet.  
  
A gout of blood shot from its nose and it keeled over.  
  
"Oh my god! Little Piggy!" Kachiko squealed as the blood began to pool around its head. In a panic, she emerged from the furo, water dripping from her body. She walked over to the black lump on the tiles, and said, "Little Piggy, are you all right?" Mindful to avoid getting a drop of blood on her, she nudged it with her toe.   
  
It didn't react in the slightest.   
  
"Oh geez. He's definitely dead. It's not my fault!" she cried, then immediately clapped her hands over her mouth. Furtively, she looked around the bathroom. No one had seen her. No one had seen the piglet enter. There were no witnesses to what had happened. If no one knew about her and the pig being in the bathroom at the same time, no one could pin this one on her.   
  
There was only one final step she had to take, and then she'd be in the clear with no one the wiser to what had occurred.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi was airing one of her throw rugs out the window of her bedroom when she noticed her mother crawling through the window next to the laundry room and land on the ground outside. She was dressed in a black jumpsuit and wore a black scarf over the lower half of her face. There was a canvas sack in one hand, and a shovel in the other. She clung to the side of the house, looking furtively all around, but not up. With excruciating slowness, she inched her way along the wall, tiptoeing silently until she stepped on the blade of a hoe laying in the yard. Her weight caused the handle to come up and hit her squarely between the eyes. Stunned, she began wobbling about the yard like a drunken sailor.  
  
Kasumi pondered the matter. Why would her mother be sneaking about while dressed like a taller and more stylish version of Happosai? She continued wondering until Kachiko wobbled into the clothesline, one of her flailing arms tangling up with a pair of boxers. Off balance she fell to the ground, a second set of boxers landing across her face.  
  
"How wonderful!" Kasumi declared. She headed out of her room, intent on sharing the good news with everyone. The first person she came across was Nodoka. She said, "Oh Auntie, I have good news."  
  
Intrigued, Nodoka asked, "What is it, Kasumi dear?"  
  
"Mother is stealing Father's underwear. She's finally showing an interest in him. I have to find Nabiki and Akane and let them know too." Kasumi flitted off.  
  
Nodoka had to use the wall to balance herself. "Oh dear god. Not only is she rude, foul-mouthed, unclean, and a poor judge of age, but she's perverted as well." Nodoka made a mental note to keep a closer eye on her own underwear, just in case it turned out Kachiko took an interest in women as well as men.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko rubbed her head, noting the lump was already starting to go down. Mopping the sheen of sweat that had gathered on her brow, she dug the shovel into the earth once again. Two more times, and she judged the hole would be deep enough for disposing of her little 'package.' Then all she had to do was fill in the hole, and she would be in the clear with no one the wiser to what had happened. Akane mentioned her pet was always wandering off and disappearing, sometimes for weeks on end. This was no different from all those other occasions, save for the fact that the pig wouldn't ever be returning. Still, Kachiko did feel a twinge of guilt over what had happened. She'd have to comfort Akane, and perhaps even help replace the piglet by getting Nabiki to pay for a new one or something.  
  
But that was for later, right now she had to put the finishing touches on her perfect plan. Smiling to herself, Kachiko said, "It's all too easy."  
  
"What's too easy?"  
  
"Ah!" Kachiko jumped away from the voice that had come from directly behind her.   
  
Ranma looked at her curiously. "What's wrong with you?"  
  
"There's nothing in the bag. Why do you ask?"  
  
"Um, I didn't ask you about the bag."  
  
"Right. I knew that. But if you had asked, there still wouldn't be anything in it," Kachiko assured him.  
  
Ranma looked down and spotted the bag laying at his feet. He bent down and picked it up.  
  
"Don't look in it. It's full of... used woman's hygiene products."  
  
Ranma pointed at the hole in the ground. "Which you were going to bury in the yard?"  
  
Kachiko shrugged. "Sure, it's a woman thing. It's like talking on the phone or complaining about how you guys leave the toilet seat up." She lunged for the bag, but Ranma pulled it out of her reach.  
  
Ranma opened up the top, evading one last attempt by Kachiko to reclaim the sack, and looked inside. "Oh my God! P-Chan!"  
  
Kachiko said, "He was alive when I put him in the bag, which means you must have killed him when you picked it up. See? It's not my fault."  
  
Ranma shot Kachiko a dirty look as he fished the piglet out of the bag. "What happened?"  
  
Unable to lie to those beautiful blue eyes of Ranma's, because she couldn't think of anything that would be remotely believable, Kachiko explained, "It's really not my fault. He walked into the bathroom while I was taking a bath and he had a brain embolism or something. All of a sudden there was blood everywhere and he fell over dead. I checked him real thoroughly to be sure."  
  
"He's still breathing," Ranma informed her.  
  
Kachiko snatched the piglet out of his hand and examined the animal for herself. "Well I'll be darned. I've heard of people coming back from the dead, but never piggies. Maybe it's because no one bothers to try to resuscitate them."  
  
Ranma kept a firm hold on P-Chan. "He saw you naked, didn't he?"  
  
"Yes. How did you know?"  
  
Ranma sighed. "You can't go prancing naked around him. He's a... shy pig."  
  
"I see. Ranma, I want you to be straight with me here."  
  
Seeing Kachiko was being absolutely serious for a change, Ranma acquiesced. "Okay."  
  
"Do you have a thing for animals? I mean like really love them in that 'more than a pet' sort of way. Because if you do, I'll understand. No, scratch that. I'll probably scream and never have a thing to do with you again, you disgusting pervert."  
  
"I am not into that sort of thing!" Ranma shouted. "It's just that P-Chan here is an odd pig. Try not to have anything to do with him. It's for your own good. Think of him as a porcine version of Mr. Tendou and treat him accordingly."  
  
"You're saying you want me to neuter him?"  
  
"No! Just don't try to take baths with him or change clothes around him or accidentally dump warm water on him."  
  
"Warm water?"  
  
"He's... ah, allergic to it."  
  
"Oh," Kachiko said knowingly, even if she didn't know. "Fine, the little piggy is your responsibility from now on. If he falls over dead, it was not my fault. Now I want to look over some of those books I got for school, especially the history texts. I need to see what sort of changes have taken place in the last few years. Want to come to my room and help me?"  
  
"Nah. Mom's over, so I'm going to spend some time with her."  
  
"Enjoy your time with the withered old... I mean the delightful woman who brought you forth into the world." Kachiko forced an inhuman smile, which was still nowhere near as frightening as her sincere one.  
  
Ranma winced. "Don't be that way. I'd appreciate it if you got along with Mom. She's only trying to help you."  
  
Kachiko grabbed the shovel. "Ranma, if I start behaving the way she wants me to," she tossed him the tool and pointed at the hole. "I want you to bury me right there."  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Day became evening. Evening became nighttime. Nighttime changed until it was on the verge of becoming the very earliest of the morning. The shadows did not care in the slightest as they merrily danced along the walls, created by the light produced from the small quartet of candles that sat on the table in the living room.   
  
The small amount of light the candles produced was barely adequate for looking over the open book before her, but it was nearly two A.M., and Kasumi was worried anything brighter might alert one of the residents of the house to the fact she was awake and cause them undue concern. Her problems were her own, and there was no point in burdening others with them.  
  
Kasumi sighed wistfully as she turned another page. Why couldn't life have been simple, like it was displayed in the book? It all should have been uncomplicated. Kasumi's mother had been returned to the home where she belonged. At long last Kasumi could continue with what had been interrupted by death: becoming a true woman under her mother's tutelage. She had tried her best without Kachiko's guidance, but she knew in her heart she had failed. She was incomplete. Akane and Nabiki had managed well enough on their own to become complete people, despite their rough edges, but not Kasumi. Deep down inside there was something unfulfilled, and she did not have a single idea of how to go about completing it. She was busy enough, keeping the house organized and in one piece as she took care of everyone, but there was something about her that was not quite right. She knew there was much more to life than what her mother had taught her before she died, and now her mother could inform her of what that was, allowing Kasumi to know true happiness again.  
  
Except her mother wasn't helping teach Kasumi anything. No cleaning. No cooking. No mother-daughter things like they used to do. Kachiko was behaving like... well, unlike how a mother should conduct herself. She was acting like a near out of control teenager, which she had never done before. In some ways, it was inconceivable that the girl before them could be the mother Kasumi had all but worshipped her entire life. This version of Kachiko Tendou that had appeared was a whole different person, someone she shouldn't be. And she showed no inclinations of ever becoming what Kasumi remembered. Every time Kasumi tried to help lead Kachiko in the right direction, she pulled away even further in seeming rebellion.  
  
It made no sense. Kachiko had been happy as a mother; Kasumi remembered it clearly. So why couldn't this girl before them accept that and be happy instead of trying to do so many other pointless things? Kasumi knew that if she had been wished into the future and some offspring of hers had told her the path to true happiness, she would have taken it in an instant. So why couldn't Kachiko do the same? Her mother's constant rejection of the way things should have been made Kasumi feel more alone now than when her mother had been dead.  
  
Dismal thoughts were placed aside as Kasumi sensed a disturbance in the house. She looked to the stairway. "Having problems sleeping, Mother?"  
  
An "Ack!" filled the air. Kachiko poked her head from around the corner and into the living room. "Geez, how do you do that? I was trying to move quietly. I know I didn't make a sound."  
  
Kasumi shrugged. She had never given the matter a second thought. "I just know these things."  
  
With the ice broken, Kachiko came fully into the room, "Mom, I mean my Mom, is the same way. I'd try tiptoeing around and you'd hear her voice come from the kitchen, "Kachiko, don't try hiding under the stairs to avoid your chores.' Or 'Kachiko, don't try to climb out your window to see that boy waiting for you in the yard.' It didn't matter how sneaky I tried to be, she always knew. It creeped the hell out of me. I wonder if she had secret cameras installed in the house and the control panel was hidden in the kitchen."  
  
Kasumi looked at her mother in near horror. "Why would you try to get out of housework?"  
  
"It's tedious and boring. Although I know it has to be done. I'd just prefer someone else do it."  
  
"But it stabilizes a home and helps others by providing them with a sense of familiarity. It's very rewarding in and of itself. That's what you always told me."  
  
"I was probably suckering you into doing all the work," Kachiko stated bluntly. "What are you doing in here with a bunch of candles? Performing some sort of dark religious ceremony involving the sacrifice of small animals?"  
  
"No!"  
  
"I was only kidding...mostly," Kachiko added under her breath. "If you're having trouble sleeping, I can fix you up some warm milk. That usually does the trick."  
  
The way Kachiko gave the suggestion temporarily quelled Kasumi's disappointment in her mother's attitude. "That's what you used to give me when I was little and had trouble sleeping."  
  
"There you have it," Kachiko said. She moved closer to the table to get a better look. "So what have you got there?"  
  
The mournful gaze returned. "A photo album of happier times."  
  
Kachiko seated herself at the table so she could get a better look at the contents of the album. She pointed at one of the pictures. "Is that supposed to be me and you?"  
  
Kasumi looked at the picture in question. It was a photo of the two of them side-by-side in matching aprons. Kasumi noted they were quite the mismatched pair, one so much younger than the other, wearing as much food on her clothing as what was in the bowl. There wasn't even much of a family resemblance. The only thing that was similar were their smiles, which were exactly the same. It was one of Kasumi's favorite pictures, which made the current situation seem all the more depressing. "Yes," Kasumi said, quietly.  
  
Kachiko bent her head low because of the dim lighting. "Cute, in that homey sort of way. It looks like you two were enjoying yourselves."  
  
"You're one of the people in the picture," Kasumi reminded her.   
  
"Ah yes," Kachiko said knowingly. "It reminds me of the day I went back in time and helped storm the Bastille."  
  
Kasumi was in shock once again. "You aided the French Revolution?"  
  
"Nope. And I didn't do this either," Kachiko pointed to the picture. "I keep telling you, that isn't me. I mean, it might have been me to you, but it isn't me to me. Argh! Time travel completely !#$%'s the ability to use tenses!" Kachiko pulled at her hair in frustration.   
  
Kasumi returned to staring at the picture, twice as miserable as before.   
  
Suddenly awkward, Kachiko said, "But, um, well, why don't you show me the rest of these photos, since they mean so much to you and everything?" she quickly added.   
  
Uncertain of what to make of the request, Kasumi assented and turned the page. "Here's one where we're at a picnic."  
  
Kachiko looked at the photo Kasumi indicated. "There's octopus balls in there. They're my favorite. Along with--"  
  
"Sukiyaki," Kasumi finished. "Yes, I remember. You never grew tired of them. When I started to get good at cooking, that was about all we made. At one point Father demanded we make something else, even if it was only plain ramen, since he had had enough sukiyaki and octopus balls. And then you told him you wanted to make sure I could perfect the perfect food."  
  
Kachiko laughed. "That's a good one. I am a master of word play."  
  
"And then Father and I looked at you strangely. Then he took me aside and said you shouldn't abuse me like that. But I know you meant well."  
  
Kachiko grumbled, "No one respects good humor at any age."   
  
Kasumi turned to another one. "Here's you and father at the Tenryumon Shrine to bring in the new year."  
  
Kachiko's features softened. "That used to be my favorite shrine. Did you know when I was a kid I burned part of it down? It wasn't my fault, though. They shouldn't leave paint thinner near gasoline in places where kids who have matches are just learning about what fire can do. And those temples must be made of dry kindling or something. Not that the priests wanted to hear it. Umm... why don't we move on?" Kachiko turned the page. "This looks fascinating. I don't recognize where it is, though."  
  
Seeing Kachiko was now acting interested, Kasumi's mood improved. "That was taken on our trip to Okinawa."  
  
"I've always wanted to go to Okinawa, but my parents didn't believe in going to beaches. They thought it was scandalous that people there wore 'less than the proper amount of clothing.' Occasionally I went with Sakura or on school trips and such, so I did get some fun in the sun. Picnics weren't high on the list of priorities either. I don't think I did anything with my parents, or at least anything that I liked. I'm glad I took you guys around and showed you how to have fun."  
  
"Oh yes," Kasumi said happily. "We did lots of things together and we had a great deal of fun. We always went as a family everywhere. I remember it all. It was wonderful."  
  
"It's good to see I know how to raise kids," Kachiko said with an amused grin. Then the smile faded. She whispered in a conspiratorial tone, "Tell me something, and be honest with me. Nabiki was adopted, wasn't she?"  
  
In answer, Kasumi turned the pages to an earlier time in the photo album. She pointed to a picture that held a two year old version of her in Soun's arms. Kachiko stood next to them, a tremendous bulge in her stomach.  
  
"Switched at the hospital?" Kachiko asked.  
  
Kasumi shook her head.  
  
Kachiko appeared depressed at the revelation. "It's hard to believe anyone with my genes could go so bad."  
  
A part of Kasumi, one she kept under tight control, wanted to say, "But I think she's far more like you than either Akane or I are." But Kasumi kept such rude and improper thoughts to herself and chose to say, "Nabiki's really nice once you get to know her, or if she decides you have nothing of value she wants."   
  
"Yeah, sure," Kachiko said dryly. She flipped through to the next page and stared at it icily. "Blech, looks like I lost my girlish figure after I had her. I'll have to give the brat hell over that one." She flipped the page and looked at the next set of photos. "Damn, I'm a bloated pig again. Looks like I was maintaining a constant state of barefoot and pregnant. My old man must have been proud I turned into the submissive little brood mare he always wanted."  
  
"That's not true. You were happy having the three of us to raise," Kasumi insisted.   
  
"Yeah, maybe. I did stop at three, thankfully." Kachiko flipped through some of the other pictures, most of them involving her with some combination of Soun and the girls. "You know, that old perv wasn't half bad looking back then."  
  
"You and Father were always affectionate with one another."  
  
"Eww, don't say that out loud. He might get ideas." Kachiko's eyes searched the room, as though Soun might appear at any second and try to embrace her. "He's way past my prime now. And a basketcase. I've never liked older guys anyway. Sakura used to have the hots for guys that were college age. I think she had a crush on half the guys her older sister used to date. I could never understand that. I want someone close to my age so we'll have more in common."  
  
"But Father isn't that much older than you."  
  
"Do you think Mr. Saotome's a hot stuff?"  
  
"Of course not!"  
  
"Too old, isn't he?"  
  
"Um, well, his age... It doesn't really matter how old he is since he's married."  
  
Kachiko smiled smugly. "Admit it. You know you think he's too old. And since you're two years older than me, that makes the age difference between me and your father even worse."  
  
"But Father's a nice man and you loved him once. I know you would love him just as much if you got to know him."  
  
"Enough."   
  
Once again, Kasumi was reminded of an older version of Kachiko being stern in such a manner, and again Kasumi found herself instinctively doing as she was told.  
  
With the discussion ended, Kachiko continued leafing through the album. As she looked the pictures over she said, "You know, I have to amend what I said when I first saw that picture of myself from that shrine of yours."  
  
"You do?"  
  
"Yeah. I am smiling quite a bit in these photos. Not real big happy ones, but these aren't forced. Looks like we did a lot of things together as a family. You guys are smiling a lot too."  
  
"It was probably the best time of our lives," Kasumi said sincerely.   
  
The compliment seemed to warm Kachiko. "It's nice to know I learned from my parents' mistakes and wasn't so standoffish like they were. Heck, I was gone for ten years and you still missed me. I've been gone from them for three days, and I barely even think of them. I hope they're okay, though, and not missing me too much."  
  
Kasumi froze for a moment, fearing Kachiko would ask her where her grandparents' were. But when no further questions came, she realized Kachiko was referring to them as though she had left them behind on a trip rather than wondering what they were doing in the present day.  
  
Kachiko continued leafing through the album until she ceased being in the photos. She closed the book then. "Looks like I did a heck of a job raising you guys, even if I was pretty much a headcase myself back then."  
  
"I like to think you did a wonderful job for all of us," Kasumi said warmly.  
  
"Too bad I wasn't around longer, or maybe you guys would have turned out less screwed up. Although I honestly don't know what I would have done with Nabiki. Maybe sent her somewhere to get a little discipline. Hey! There's an idea. Maybe I can talk your old man into shipping her off to some military academy."  
  
"I think Nabiki is quite happy here," Kasumi quickly provided. "I'd be delighted to receive any advice from you, though." Even if Kasumi didn't think of herself as 'screwed up.' Guidance from mother could never hurt, and perhaps it would make Kasumi a better person and make her feel more complete.  
  
Kachiko slapped the girl on the back. "Hey, I'm a proverbial repository of good advice. You listen to me. I always know what I'm talking about."  
  
Kasumi was delighted at her mother's instructional tone. "What should we talk about first?"  
  
Kachiko considered that. "Well, we can talk about martial arts, picking up guys, or how to make your chest appear bigger than it really is. I'm great at all that."  
  
The list made Kasumi somewhat leery. "Actually, I was hoping we could talk about more useful things, like cooking, sewing, or keeping house."  
  
"Ah, that's all boring stuff," Kachiko said. "I mean, I do know how to do all that happy homemaker crap, Mom saw to that, but it's all boring. It's about as much fun as... well as calligraphy."   
  
That surprised Kasumi. "You know calligraphy?"  
  
"Yeah, Mom made me learn it. She thought it would make me more elegant or something. Like I'm not elegant already." Kachiko scratched her bottom. "I'm pretty damn good at it, too, even if I don't have the patience for it. I've always been artistic. I always got complimented by teachers in art class."  
  
Eager to have her mother discuss anything with her, Kasumi said, "Could you teach me?"  
  
Kachiko appeared hesitant. "Wouldn't you rather learn how to pick up guys? I mean, let's be honest here. You look like you need a date, really, really, really bad."  
  
"I'm grateful you're so concerned about my romantic life, and I'm sure I'll meet someone as delightful as father someday--"  
  
"Oh, aim higher than that, please."  
  
Kasumi continued. "I'm sure I will. But for the moment, I'd really like you to teach me some calligraphy."  
  
Kachiko stared mournfully at the clock on the wall. But she took one look at Kasumi's hopefully gaze, and broke down. "I'm going to be a wreck tomorrow, but I'm already up, and I doubt I'll be able to go to sleep anytime soon. Go get me the stuff and I'll show you how it's done. Besides, calligraphy always used to put me to sleep. So if I doze off in the middle of teaching this to you, you let me rest."  
  
"Certainly, Mother." Kasumi began to gather the supplies.   
  
"And don't call me Mother," Kachiko commanded.   
  
Kasumi gave her a mournful look.  
  
Again, Kachiko relented. "Damn, I wish I could give that whipped puppy expression like you do. You have a God-given talent there, you know?"  
  
"No, I don't."  
  
"Which is what makes it worse," Kachiko sighed as Kasumi laid out the materials. Kachiko examined them with a surprisingly critical eye, given her lackadaisical attitude concerning the art. Satisfied the materials would do, she seated herself next to Kasumi and said, "Here's how you begin. All the action begins with the grip. It has to be firm enough to keep from leaving stray marks, but loose enough that you use strokes rather than lines."  
  
Kasumi, feeling the most blissful she had in years, listened raptly. No matter how bad things had been before, or how bad they might get, it was a moment like this that made it all worthwhile.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Special thanks to  
Eternal Last Lurker  
Chris Horton  
Michael Chase  
Max M.  
The Apprentice  
Grookill 


	7. The Things We Wish For chapter 7

Prelude  
  
Heat washed over the land in palpable waves, riding violent winds that kicked up swirls of sand across the endless desert. Visibility was less than the length of a man's arm with the tempestuous winds blowing up the loose earth from the land. The various creatures that made their home in the sandy wastes had long since learned to seek shelter from such powerful sandstorms; those that hadn't learned had become carcasses.   
  
Yet despite conditions so hostile they could kill any species on the planet in under half an hour, a man strode through the center of the storm, making his way across the expanse of desert, placing one foot in front of the other. He was tall, a giant of seven feet, and his form was massive. His legs were thick as small trees, and his arms and shoulders broad. It appeared as though he could bear the weight of the world on his shoulders; the mythical figure of Atlas given flesh.  
  
His gait was unaffected by the ferocious winds as they pummeled him head on, blowing tiny bits of rock so hard they could flay the flesh from any other creature's bones. The garments he wore spoke of one who had wandered through such terrain for a thousand miles. Every thread was travel-worn and torn. Only a plain brown cloak wrapped around his body, its hood pulled over his head and hiding his face, served as any form of protection from the elements, and even that was far from effective since it was in even worse shape than the clothing that adorned his body.   
  
Hidden in the dark recess beneath the hood, red eyes blazed, fixating on some far off object to the east. Even sand blown directly into those crimson orbs could not make them deviate from the invisible target they sought. Softly, too softly most would say considering his size, the figure intoned but two words full of unstoppable determination.   
  
"Kachiko Tendou."  
  
The figure took another step.  
  
Followed by another.   
  
And another.  
  
And the sandstorm raged on.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
  
The Things We Wish For...  
Chapter 6  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Last chapter was a bit more serious, so here we'll emphasize more humor. And do remember, what happens within is done for humorous effect, not as some kind of commentary on characters or their abilities.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present, there's only the slight complication that she was plucked out of time at the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
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Little Nabiki bit her lip worriedly as she looked over to where her big sister, Kasumi, was bawling her eyes out as she cradled a finger hidden beneath a bandage. Two nurses tried to comfort the little girl, offering lollipops and soft words of comfort, but it was to no avail as she kept crying loudly.  
  
Now Nabiki was really scared. Big Sister Kasumi never cried about anything. If this made her cry, it must have been really bad.   
  
Nabiki's mommy held her hand and tried making her go into the place that Kasumi had emerged from crying. Her mommy told her, "Come on, Nabiki. It's time for your check up."   
  
Nabiki dug her tiny heels in. "Don't wanna."  
  
Her mommy's voice didn't sound happy, like it usually did. Instead it was very firm. "Nabiki, you have to go in. It won't be worse than a pinprick. It'll all be over before you know it."  
  
Nabiki shook her head, then looked over at her bawling big sister again. She felt her own eyes begin to get watery in sympathy for her big sister's pain.  
  
Her mommy also turned to Kasumi and said in a voice that sounded like it was very tired, "Kasumi, we can get that little apron that looks like mine when we're through here."  
  
Kasumi stopped crying out loud. She rubbed tears from her eyes with her sleeve and sniffled, "Really, Mama?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Kasumi stopped sniffling, and smiled beatifically at her mommy.  
  
One of the nurses laughed and said, "Kids. They can be something else. I can't wait to have one of my own."  
  
Nabiki heard her mommy mumble something about having a spare at home so she could give one to the nurse if she had her heart set on it. "What's a spare?" Nabiki asked.  
  
Her mommy grimaced at the question. "It's nothing, dear. Now let's go in."   
  
Nabiki felt frightened as she was led to 'The Bad Place That Made Big Sister Kasumi Cry,' at least until a moment ago. Now the no longer crying girl was sucking on a lollipop as though nothing had happened. Still, Nabiki felt terrified, even if her mommy would be there to protect her from anything bad, except the things that had made big sister Kasumi cry. After all, her mommy had been with big sister and she had cried anyway. Miserably, Nabiki said, "How come big sister Kasumi gets something and I don't?"  
  
Her mommy stopped. "Well, fair is fair. What do you want? An apron like Kasumi?"  
  
Nabiki shook her head. "I wanna icecream." Icecream was easier to say as one word, instead of two, like every one else said it.  
  
Her mommy bent down to Nabiki's level so she could talk to her face-to-face. She seemed to consider the request. "Icecream? You want icecream? I think we can arrange that."  
  
"I want five," Nabiki held up both hands and all her fingers to show the number.  
  
"Five will make you sick. You can have one."  
  
"Four," Nabiki said, she was uncertain how much that really was, other than it was more than one.  
  
Her Mommy seemed amused. "Oh, a bargainer, eh? You can have two."  
  
"Three."  
  
"Two or none, and that's my final offer."  
  
Nabiki had to think that one over. She was pretty sure two was a lot of icecream.  
  
While she thought about it, Big Sister Kasumi said to one of the nurses, "I'm going to get an apron so I can help my Mama cook. And when I get big, I'll cook all her food for her."  
  
Her mommy said, "Remember that helpful attitude when I get really old and decrepit and it's your turn to change my diapers."  
  
Big Sister Kasumi laughed. "You're silly, Mama. You don't wear diapers. Akane does."  
  
Nabiki tugged her mommy's skirt and informed her, "I want two icecream."  
  
"Deal." Her mommy held out her hand. Nabiki held hers out. Her mommy grabbed the hand and pumped it up and down.  
  
As she did so, Nabiki noticed a small white line on the middle knuckle. She pointed to it with her free hand. "What's that?"  
  
Her mommy withdrew the hand and looked at it. For a moment, Nabiki thought her mommy looked sad. "Just a memento of the past." Then the sad look was gone and she looked normal. She held Nabiki's hand. "Now come along. The doctor's just going to check you up, then you can get your icecream."  
  
As Nabiki began walking down the corridor, hand-in-hand with her parent, she looked up into her mommy's face, and her mommy smiled at her. It was that special one that always made Nabiki feel better, even if she scraped her knee and it hurt. It would chase away her fears when she was afraid of sleeping alone at night. And if she was just feeling ordinary and her mommy smiled like that, it always made Nabiki happy and warm inside because she knew she was loved.  
  
And then there was a loud noise coming from the halls. At first it frightened her, but then something in Nabiki's memory came surging to the forefront. Her mother and the doctor's office melted away as the word 'alarm clock' became conceptualized.   
  
Nabiki's eyes opened with a snap and she hit the alarm with far more force than was necessary. She remembered the last moments of the dream, moments she would have preferred to drift into the oblivion that all the other dreams had traveled into.  
  
Nabiki turned a baleful gaze at the wall, in the direction that Akane's room lay. "You are not my mother," she snarled. And she would prove it to herself today.  
  
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"Saotome, are you certain this is a good idea?"  
  
"Tendou, old buddy, drastic times call for drastic measures."  
  
Soun stood in his backyard and looked up at the window of the room that now served as his wife's quarters. He was dressed in a suit that had to be dragged out of mothballs; a relic dating back from the time his wife was older and still alive. There was a little tightness in the waist, but aside from that minor discomfort it fit like a glove. It was a boost to his ego to know that he had stayed in such great shape over the years.   
  
Soun adjusted the guitar in his hands. "But don't serenades usually take place in the evening? It's still early morning."  
  
Genma scoffed. "That's the problem. Evening serenades are cliché and unoriginal. Doing it in the morning shows you're willing to go that extra step and do things no one else would think of to win your wife's heart."  
  
"Sound reasoning," Soun agreed.   
  
Genma looked down at his watch. "All right. It's now six o' one on the nose. Her alarm should have gone off and she's awake. Play that music."  
  
Strumming the strings of his instrument, Soun began playing a soft melody that came easily to his hands. It was a tune he had played for his wife when they were still in the early romantic stages of their relationship. He began to sing the song with the volume that accompanied the words.   
  
"I can't get no sat-is-fac-tion!"  
  
Genma jostled his friend, making him hit a stray note. "Be careful, Saotome," Soun warned.   
  
"I saw the curtain in the window move," Genma said.  
  
"Oh." Soun sang louder this time, knowing that Kachiko would swoon at the serenade he was singing. It sang of the frustration in his soul at being denied his rightful place at his wife's side. And by showing her his pain, she would come to understand his suffering, take pity on him, and see him in a new light.  
  
"The window just went up, though she hasn't stuck her head out yet," Genma informed him.  
  
Soun sang louder, his heart beginning to fill at joy at finally inspiring his wife to take notice of him.  
  
"And I cry. CryAGH!-"  
  
Cried out in pain, specifically, as a barbell connected solidly between his eyes.   
  
Sticking her head out the window, a bleary-eyed Kachiko shouted, "Whatever you're doing to that cat, stop it now, you evil fiend!" and slammed the window shut.  
  
Genma looked down at the barbell shaped impression left on his fallen friend's face. "Maybe she'll be more responsive to music in the evening. Some folks just aren't morning people."  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"But I don't want to fight you, Ranma," Kachiko said as she adjusted her gi.  
  
"You have to," Ranma insisted, following her down the hallway leading to the dojo.  
  
Kachiko shook her head. "I don't have the time. I have special preparations to make before I head to school today. No way I'm letting that size-changing freak drain me again."  
  
"Your beating me was a fluke. I was going easy on you. You fought dirty. I demand a rematch."  
  
"You're not going to give up on this, are you?" Kachiko gasped in exasperation.  
  
"Not until you let me have a rematch."  
  
Kachiko made a great production of looking at a clock on the wall. "Well, I suppose if I forgo my usual workout, I'll have the time. Very well."  
  
Ranma jumped up for joy and pumped his fist. "All right!"  
  
Kachiko rolled her eyes as Ranma grabbed her hand and made them rush to the dojo. They came across Akane just as they were about to enter.  
  
"What are you two up to?" Akane asked suspiciously, glaring at the way Ranma was holding her mother's hand.  
  
"Rematch time," Ranma said gleefully. "I'm going to prove once and for all her beating me was just luck."  
  
Akane grimaced slightly. "Well, don't get carried away. She is my mom, you know."  
  
"Relax, Akane. I won't hurt her."  
  
As they entered the dojo proper, Kachiko turned and sat on bent knee before Ranma. She bowed her head to the floor, her forehead making contact with the sturdy wood surface. "Ranma, I must thank you for saving me from that horrible car accident the other day. You kept me from a fate worse than death, and I feel terribly sorry now about what I did during our last fight. I promise you that this time I won't go for a shot to your nuts." She rose her head from the floor and asked coyly, "Are they feeling better now?" Her hand headed towards the area of inquiry.  
  
Akane slapped it away before it could close the distance to its target. "Cut it out, Mom!"  
  
Seeing the apologetic (and slightly amorous) look on Kachiko's face, Ranma couldn't help saying, "Hey, no problem. I'll go easy on you." And it was the complete and honest truth. Largely in part because if he gave Kachiko so much as a bruise, Mr. Tendou would go so demon head he'd probably give Ranma a heart attack or something. And Kasumi would probably look at him disapprovingly for roughing up her mother, which in many ways would be worse. But it didn't matter. The fight was already in the bag. It was just a formality to make official.  
  
Kachiko bowed again and profusely said, "Oh, thank you so very much for being merciful."  
  
Ranma laughed embarrassingly, causing Akane to roll her eyes exactly as her mother had earlier. The act was so transparent it caused her to wince. She couldn't believe Ranma was gullible enough to fall for it. Ryouga, perhaps, but not Ranma. Yet her fiancé seemed to be eating up every word Kachiko said. Part of Akane wanted to warn him, but another part made her remain silent. As much as she wanted him to win, he had become cockier than usual since that whole Saffron thing. Maybe being taken down a peg or two would be for the best in the long run. And besides, it was hard for Akane to root against her mother.  
  
So Akane took a neutral stance and allowed the fight to play out as it would. She did find herself continuing to shake her head sadly at Ranma's gullibility as the opponents' warmed up, then squared off with one another.  
  
All levity disappeared as they fell into stances identical to their first confrontation. After a full half minute of neither doing anything, Ranma chose to run forward, and unleash an assault, making sure his defenses were primarily guarding against a high blow.  
  
Kachiko retaliated by shifting to an identical pose from the first fight when she delivered her attack to Ranma. Her fist gained an aura of blue as she shouted, "ROARING THUNDERFIST OF DOOM!" and launched a punch towards Ranma's head.  
  
It was halfway there before stopping. Instead of following through, Kachiko's foot began to rise off the floor.  
  
Ranma smirked as he immediately refocused his defense to his lower anatomy. What kind of a chump did she take him for? He knew Kachiko was full of crap when she kissed up and said she wouldn't go for his nuts. Ranma Saotome never fell for the same trick twice. From Ryouga to Herb, he could find the perfect counter to any attack seen once. It didn't matter if he had to hold back. Ranma had thought long and hard after the last fight and knew how to counter Kachiko's 'Roaring Thunderfist' attack and subdue her without hurting her in the slightest. And the attempt to kick him in the groin was how it all began. "I didn't fall for it, Suck-"   
  
And then the foot, which had only raised a centimeter off the ground, sat back down as the fist continued forward, doubling its speed.  
  
A feint! Ranma almost got his hand up despite the unexpected shift in the direction of the Thunderfist attack. But Kachiko was deceptively fast. Ranma only managed to brush the arm as the glowing fist impacted directly into his open mouth, cutting off the rest of his mocking sentence.  
  
For a moment, Ranma was surprised, despite the fact it was a chi attack, the punch felt barely stronger than a normal blow. It wouldn't come close to doing more than making him back off for a moment.  
  
And then Kachiko unleashed the second half of the attack.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane's eyes bulged as she saw Kachiko's chi discharge directly into Ranma's mouth. For a moment, he bulged up like a balloon, then shrank down to normal proportions. Kachiko backed away, but held her no longer glowing fist ready to unleash another blow. Ranma stood motionless. A small trail of blue wafted up from his mouth as he began teetering back and forth. Then his eyes rolled into the back of his head as he fell over.  
  
Kachiko flashed a 'V' for victory sign to her daughter. "Lesson Number Twenty of the Tendou School of Martial Arts: martial artists are never as tough on the inside as they are on the outside, which makes the 'Turn Them Inside Out Technique' particularly effective." Kachiko took on a more flustered mien. "Unless of course they know that stupid Iron Stomach Technique, in which case the attack will be reflected back to you and knock you out. But how was I to know that bull dyke, Yumi, would have a counter to my unstoppable attack? And it wasn't fair how she made me dress in a boy's school uniform since I lost. And what's worse, everyone thought I looked good as a boy. I hate perverted crossdressers." Kachiko sniffled slightly.  
  
Akane paid almost no attention to her mother as she rushed to Ranma's side. She cradled his fallen form in her arms, then she shouted to Kachiko. "What were you thinking?! You could have killed him!"  
  
Kachiko waved her hand dismissively. "Get real. I've used that attack plenty of times. You just have to know how to work it so it disrupts an opponent's insides rather than causing them genuine harm. The only long term effect should be a decrease in his appetite for a couple of days. I've never killed anyone with it." She looked Ranma over more closely. "Um, he is still breathing, isn't he?"  
  
Ranma gurgled slightly, blue still coming out of his mouth.  
  
"No thanks to you," Akane said.  
  
"Hey, he's stronger than me. If I don't go all out right from the start, I might lose," Kachiko countered.   
  
"You tricked him," Akane accused.  
  
Kachiko shrugged off the accusation. "If you can't overpower your opponent, you'd darn well better outsmart him, or you might as well give up before you start." Seeing Ranma was starting to fully rouse himself, Kachiko decided it would be best to leave, lest he unreasonably lose his temper and do something she might regret later. She exited the room without looking back.  
  
Akane shivered slightly. There were times when her mother reminded her of Nabiki way too often.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Nabiki applauded as Kachiko exited the dojo.  
  
That made the time lost girl shoot her middle 'daughter' a suspicious glare. "What's that for?"  
  
"An impressive victory over a more powerful opponent. I can appreciate someone using their head around here for a change, and the truth is, Ranma tends to get too full of himself when it comes to martial arts."   
  
Kachiko seemed delighted by the praise. "Thanks for the compliment. I didn't think you had it in you."  
  
"Oh, I enjoyed the outcome tremendously." Since Ranma is going to endlessly harass you for a rematch until he kicks your tail, and you can only avoid him for so long, but it'll be fun to watch you try to squirm out of it, Nabiki wanted to say but couldn't. Best to allow Kachiko find out the hard way.  
  
"Hey, what's with the camera?"  
  
Nabiki flinched. She had wanted to 'congratulate' her mother so badly that she had forgotten to hide the camera. The pictures she had taken of Kachiko warming up and beating Ranma would fetch a good price from Kunou, one that would recoup some of the losses incurred from her mother's presence. But now she had gotten sloppy, and her scheme was in jeopardy.   
  
Thinking fast, Nabiki said, "It's a new one. I wanted to shoot something to make sure it works right."  
  
Kachiko chuckled. "My poor, sweet, silly daughter."  
  
Nabiki's heart stepped a beat. How did her mother know she was lying?  
  
Shaking her head sadly, Kachiko said, "The answer to all your woes is right here."  
  
"Um, it is?" Nabiki said, completely at a loss.  
  
"Sure. I'm highly photogenic." Kachiko struck a sexy stance, pretending she was blowing a kiss at Nabiki.  
  
Nabiki was forced to blink three times before she could concentrate enough to respond. "You're actually going to... voluntarily pose, for me?"  
  
Kachiko changed her stance, giving Nabiki a coy, yet kittenish smile. "Sure. You couldn't use a better model."  
  
"What's the catch?"  
  
Kachiko stopped posing and looked at her in confusion. "Catch? What catch could there be in having your picture shot? Look, if you're going to be whiny just because some money of yours got misplaced, I'll leave and you can shoot some trees or something."  
  
"No!" Nabiki was quick to say.   
  
"Okay." Kachiko struck a 'playful' pose.  
  
Nabiki began snapping away. She couldn't believe her luck. Sometimes good things did come to the truly deserving. It was about time something went her way, given how this intruder had managed to disrupt her life so easily.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Walking alone to school so that she could have some time to herself, Nabiki leafed through the collection of pictures she had accumulated in one morning. The seductive ones of Kachiko would fetch the best price; the girl did know how to pose for the camera. Kunou would lay down a fortune for his newest 'Tigress of Passion' or whatever silly name he had concocted for Kachiko.  
  
Now there was a thought that soured Nabiki's mood; Tatewaki Kunou becoming her stepfather. She'd have to be careful not to encourage him too hard. True, she did not want to consider Kachiko her mother, and it was getting easier by the day, but technically she was, and certainly everyone else that knew regarded her as such. If a romance with Kunou ended up blossoming... well, even Nabiki's mind did not want to think along those lines.  
  
Unfortunately, once the thought came to her, Nabiki found she could not get it out of her head. She was still thinking of how repellent having Kunou as her stepfather would be when an unusual sight caught her eye and broke the unappealing train of thought. A rather large man, equipped with a number of painful looking devices on his belt, was hanging up posters on light posts. He was totally absorbed in his work as he finished the hanging a poster and moved to the next.  
  
Nabiki paused in front of the sheet. It was a warning issued from some group called 'The CLAP', concerning some woman suspected of 'acts of perversion involving young children.'   
  
And then Nabiki's eyes settled on the hand drawn picture at the bottom depicting the 'perpetrator'. "Excuse me, Sir?"   
  
The man turned to Nabiki, looking at her through only one eye, the other ringed in black and completely swollen shut. "Yes?"  
  
Nabiki selected a picture from her collection. It was one of the 'tame' photos of Kachiko, that was merely a head shot. Nabiki had decided to throw it away since it wouldn't be able to fetch a good price, and she didn't want to flood the Kunou Market too fast. She held it in front of the man. "This wouldn't happen to be the girl you're looking for?"  
  
The man tore the photo out of Nabiki's hands and managed a cyclopean glint of evil at it. "Oh yes. That's the one. How did you get this?"  
  
"I shoot photos of people and happened to take one of her as she passed by," Nabiki lied.   
  
The man continued staring evilly at the photograph. "Thanks a lot for your help. This will make warning people about her easier. We'll remake the posters right away." He all but ran down the street.  
  
Nabiki smiled to herself. Some days, it was just too easy.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The side trip delayed Nabiki long enough that she knew she had arrived well after Ranma, Akane, and Kachiko had made it to school. As she entered through the gates, she saw that there was a huge public spectacle of some sort going on. A large crowd of students had gathered in front of the school, talking loudly among themselves.  
  
Nabiki went up to a random student. "What's going on?"  
  
"It's a showdown," she answered.  
  
Something that might need her attention, then. Nabiki muscled her way through the crowd. Presumably, it was the usual: Ranma and either one of the usual suspects, or some random wandering martial artist that realized it was Wednesday and it was time to reveal himself so he could challenge Ranma. However, the assumption was debunked when Nabiki made her way to the edge of the ring that had formed in the middle of the crowd. She saw Ranma was not in the center, but rather standing along the inner edge of the ring, next to Akane. It was Kachiko who dominated the attention of the student body, standing in the middle of the clearing with her fists firmly planted on her hips in an open show of defiance, Opposite her stood an adult Miss Hinako, looking somewhat sexy as she had one hand firmly on her hip and looked down at the smaller girl in irritation.   
  
"I should have known," Nabiki told herself. She decided to look for Kunou later. For the moment, she was going to watch her mother in action and see how she could take advantage of the outcome.  
  
The tense silence between the challengers ended as Hinako said, "Have you done as I told you and forsworn any interest in my man, you faithless little tramp, or do you need another lesson in morals?" She flipped a coin up, sunlight dancing on its surface, then nimbly plucked it out of mid-air.  
  
Kachiko's face began twitching. "No one tells me who I'm interested in and who I'm not." She turned to the crowd and said, "Hey everyone! Do you know what Miss Hinako and a dick have in common? When they fill up with something, they get really big, but when they shoot it off, they shrink back down to their normal size."  
  
Scandalized, Hinako turned a furious shade of red that made everyone remotely near her back away in fear. "How dare you compare me to male genitalia! You're just jealous of my proportions because you're a little girl in *every* sense of the word." Hinako crossed her arms under her ample bosom to accentuate the point.  
  
Kachiko impossibly turned a darker shade of crimson. "Like anyone with an inflatable bust has the right to comment on another woman's chest size!"  
  
Hinako brought up her coin. "Do you have anything else to say before I drain you so dry you won't have enough energy to want a man ever again?"  
  
Kachiko switched from anger to amusement. "Do you think I'm stupid enough to fall for the same trick twice? My mind is like a steel trap. My expertise in the field of combat; unsurpassed. I'm ten moves ahead of you and you don't even know it. I-"  
  
"I have to get a lesson plan ready, so hurry up and finish posturing so I can drain you," Hinako snapped.  
  
"Yeah, get on with it!" someone shouted.  
  
"You're rambling as bad as Kunou," another chimed in.  
  
"Attack her or let her drain you, we have to get to class," came a voice from the back.  
  
Confounded by the inability to deliver her speech and instill terror in the heart of her opponent, which for some odd reason was only making Hinako calm down as she grew bored, Kachiko declared, "Behold, the ultimate defense against your energy draining attack." Kachiko pulled out a large pile of silvery material from her school bag.  
  
Hinako tensed up slightly at the move.  
  
Then Kachiko showed what it was by donning the material. It took her less than a handful of seconds to put on the outfit, zipper it up, and lock the helmet into place. Once she confirmed the seals were intact, she shouted out in a muffled voice, "Behold this cutting edge piece of modern technology: a radiation suit. Constructed by Mishima Heavy Industries, it's guaranteed to seal off a human being and protect them from nasty energy. I could walk through a nuclear reactor and not even break a sweat. Encased within its protective confines, you and your stupid power can't harm me. Hahahaha!"  
  
Everyone save Nabiki sweatdropped at the declaration. She scowled and wondered where Kachiko found the money to purchase such an expensive suit. She patted down the outside of her skirt and felt the reassuring weight of her billfold. Then she reconsidered and reached inside. Her fingers caressed the unmistakably exotic texture of a genuine bill. Apparently she had overestimated her mother's savvy.  
  
Kachiko continued her boisterous posturing. "Now that I'm insulated from your lame attack, you one trick pony, I'm really going to teach you what it is to mess with Kachiko Ten-"  
  
"Happo-gojuuen Setsu," Hinako said idly as she held up her coin.  
  
Chi energy coursed out of the radiation suit, causing it to collapsed into itself.   
  
Hinako walked over to stand on top of the shiny material. She stared contemptuously at it. "I have no idea what Soun-chan can possibly see in juvenile delinquent like you." She twisted her heel on the heap, then turned to the now bored spectators, who seemed to be losing interest with the challenge having ended with a decided whimper. "No more lounging about out here. Everyone go to class."  
  
Hinako spun around once again on her heel, shot the pile an amused glance, and walked off.   
  
"I was so sure it would work," Kachiko moaned inside the suit as Ranma and Akane dragged her crumpled form inside.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Mo... err, Cousin, you have got to get a grip," Akane said,  
  
The recovered Kachiko trembled in anger. "No way. That's twice she's attacked me for no reason."   
  
Akane said, "Well, it's over sort of a misunderstanding. She doesn't realize that Dad's always been married to you and thinks he's still available. Maybe I should explain things to her."  
  
"I am NOT married to him, and that's besides the point," Kachiko snarled. "No, it's too late to explain things. I have been wronged and need revenge."  
  
"Exactly," Ranma said.  
  
Kachiko unleashed an impish smile at the boy. "See? Even Ranma agrees with me."  
  
"No, I was agreeing with your reasoning since it applies to me too," Ranma corrected. "I've been wronged twice, and I need revenge against you. I want a rematch."  
  
"That's the twentieth time you've bugged me about it since this morning! Let it go!"  
  
"No way! You ain't better than me. All you did was use another dirty trick. You went against standard martial arts etiquette."  
  
Kachiko stared at him. "What the heck are you talking about? What standard martial arts etiquette?"  
  
"Don't you know anything?" Ranma asked. "It's simple. The way it always works is, if someone learns some new, powerful technique, and they attack me with it and put me at a temporary disadvantage-"  
  
"You mean they beat you," Kachiko clarified  
  
"No," Ranma said firmly. "I never lose. I just get put at a temporary disadvantage."  
  
"They beat him," Akane told her mother.  
  
"They do not! It's just like the early rounds of a fight, and they get more points is all," Ranma insisted. "Anyhow, the way it always works is, even if someone does learn some new technique that can beat mine, I always devise a way to counter it and then beat the guy when he tries to use the technique again. And then they go away and don't bother me again. Except Ryouga, and he doesn't try to hassle me anymore, so it just took longer in his case. See? I always win in the end.  
  
"But you broke with tradition. You modified your technique BEFORE I could use my counter to it. I practiced so that every way you could possibly kick me in the balls with that attack could be blocked. And then you made it seem like you were going to kick me by saying you wouldn't and laid it on real thick with bad acting."  
  
"It was not bad acting, I was serious and I didn't try to do it." Kachiko sniffled as her eyes took on a watery sheen. "Ranma, I'm hurt that you think I would lie to you."  
  
"I'm sure you never would," he stated.  
  
Kachiko looked happily at him through her watery eyes.  
  
"Unless it was convenient for you," he finished.   
  
The impending tears disappeared and Kachiko snapped her fingers. "Darn. I thought I could sucker you at least one more time." She pulled out her small notebook and muttered as she wrote, "Marginally less gullible than originally believed."  
  
Ranma turned smug at the perceived compliment. "Anyway, the real problem is you pretended you were going to use the exact same technique you did last time, and acted like you were trying to outsmart me by saying you weren't going to use the technique when you were. Except you really didn't use the same move. What you were supposed to do was try to trick me by saying you weren't going to use the same technique, and then really use it, since I had a counter to it and had no intention of believing you in the first place," Ranma explained. "I mean you even gave it the same name. At least say 'Modified Roaring Thunderfist of Doom' or something."  
  
Kachiko looked at him quizzically. "And if I don't do that, you think of it as cheating?"  
  
Ranma considered the words. "Well, it is, sort of. I know if I said 'Kachuu Tenshen Amaguriken' and used my 'Moko Takabisha' instead, everyone would complain. What would you call it?"  
  
'Learning' was what Kachiko wanted to say, but then it occurred to her that Ranma grasping the concept of 'learning' might not be in her best interest. Instead she said, "So your primary complaint is, I didn't act in the same predictable manner everyone else you've fought did, which is the real reason you suffered a 'temporary disadvantage' today?"  
  
"Yep." Ranma looked at her smugly.  
  
Kachiko bowed before Ranma and said in a voice full of sincerity, "I'm sorry. You're right. That was rude of me. I'll use the exact same attack next time, and we'll see if you've come up with a decent counter. How's that?"  
  
Ranma nodded his head in agreement, then asked, "So we can have the rematch tomorrow?"  
  
"No."  
  
Ranma tugged at her blouse like a little child asking a parent to buy them a toy. "I want a rematch."  
  
"You're not going to stop until I say yes, are you?"  
  
"Rematch," he repeated.  
  
The walls of resistance finally collapsed with an exasperated sigh. "Fine."  
  
"Yes!" Ranma smiled openly. That nagging technique was nearly invincible when wielded by someone with his relentless persistence. Or a five year old.  
  
Seeing his satisfied state, Kachiko then added, "But only if you agree to go out on a date with me."  
  
"Deal," Ranma said quickly.   
  
"Ranma," Akane growled out in a warning tone he was all too familiar with.  
  
He held up his hands defensively, "Relax. I have no intention of losing. I've learned from my mistakes and will be ready for everything, And once I win, I don't have to go anywhere."  
  
"Whoa! Hold on there," Kachiko interrupted. "Who said anything about me having to win? I said I'd give you a rematch if you'd go out on a date with me. I never put in any stipulation about winning."  
  
That took Ranma aback. "Well of course you gotta win. Those are the stakes in the fight. It ain't fair if you get to go out on a date with me even if I lose."  
  
Kachiko's eyes took on a knowing light. "Oh. Stakes. I see. You want stakes?"  
  
Ranma nodded his head. "You got it."  
  
"Okay," Kachiko said. "If I win, I get a second date with you, and if you win, you only have to go out with me once."  
  
Ranma said, "All right! That'll... hey! I'd still have to go out on a date with you, and maybe even two. That's worse than before."  
  
"Not for me, and you're the one that wanted to fight for something. The stakes are for one date. The second date you can think of as the entry fee to the fight."  
  
"No way!" Ranma said adamantly.  
  
"No rematch then. But don't worry. I won't let anyone know I beat you. Except maybe Tachi-chan, I bet he'll get a kick out of it since he does so crappy against you."  
  
"You can't tell Tachi-chan about..." Ranma's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Tachi-chan? When did Kunou become Tachi-chan?"  
  
"Yesterday," Kachiko gushed as she envisioned a dashing Kunou reciting poetry about her beauty while he swept her off her feet. He hadn't actually done that yet, but she knew he would once they had a moment alone. "That's the pet name I came up for him. I haven't come up with one for you yet. You're a hard one to nail down."  
  
"You shouldn't be so familiar with him," Akane said. "It'll only encourage him."  
  
"Yes, that would be the point behind pet nicknames. It's a sign of affection," Kachiko said slowly, as though explaining something to a small child.   
  
"But you can't date him!" Akane insisted.  
  
Kachiko shot Akane a dirty look. "Let's see. According to you, I can't date Ranma or Tachi-chan. According to tall, saggy, and skanky, I can't date Soun, not that I want to. Gee, I guess that leaves Mr. Saotome."  
  
"He's married!" Akane said.  
  
"Right," Kachiko confirmed. "So here's an idea. I'll date who I want, when I want, and if you're really desperate, you can have sloppy seconds."  
  
"Mom!"  
  
"Enough," Kachiko growled. "I'm not in the mood for romance anyway. I want to teach that vampiric brat a lesson. She's made me suffer a temporary setback, and in my case it really is a temporary setback instead of an inability to admit when I'm outclassed. I have to prove my superiority by being the first one to beat her."  
  
"Actually, I've beaten her before," Ranma said with no hint of modesty whatsoever.  
  
Kachiko shot him a suspicious glance. "You're just saying that, aren't you?"  
  
Ranma shook his head. "Unlike you, I don't lie about who I beat and who I didn't. I defeated her in front of the entire school. Just ask anyone."  
  
Akane nodded in confirmation  
  
Instantly, Kachiko had Ranma's hand held in hers and unleashed a starry-eyed gaze upon him. "Oh great and powerful Ranma, please tell me how I would go about defeating that mewling brat?"  
  
"Can I have a rematch without the dates?"  
  
"I'll seriously consider it," Kachiko promised.   
  
Ranma nodded. "Okay, the first thing I did was ambush her from above. I hid out on top of the lights in one of the hallways outside her classroom and waited for her to pass by."  
  
"Yes! I should have thought of that myself!" Kachiko released his hand and bolted off.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Hey, she sensed me and drained me before I could get the drop on her!" Kachiko complained.  
  
"That's because you ran off before I could tell you it didn't work," Ranma said.  
  
Kachiko dragged herself up to Ranma, her strength slowly returning. She noted Akane had evidently gone on to class. It was just as well. The fewer people who heard of the tactical blunder, the better. "Why would you tell me what didn't work?"  
  
"So you wouldn't repeat my mistakes."  
  
Kachiko sighed. "Okay, so what did you do to beat her?"  
  
"Next I held in my battle aura so she couldn't power up by draining me."  
  
"And that worked?"  
  
"No, she just used a bigger coin."  
  
Kachiko shot a look dirty enough to make even Ranma cringe. In a low and dangerous voice, she intoned, "Why don't we skip over the attacks that didn't work and go directly to the ones that did?"  
  
"Well, if you don't want to learn from my mistakes..."  
  
"I don't," Kachiko assured him.  
  
Ranma began speaking in a lecturing manner. "Okay. In order to beat her, you have to lock out her draining and shooting ability."  
  
"Sounds promising."  
  
"You do this by touching a set of pressure points on her right breast."  
  
Kachiko's hand curled into a fist as her eyebrow began twitching violently. It was times like this that Ranma really hated the close resemblance she had to Akane.   
  
"I see how it is," Kachiko snarled.   
  
"Umm, you do?"  
  
Kachiko nodded. "You're not going to tell me since you were able to beat her, and if I can't do the same, that makes you better than me in your mind. Fine! You don't have to tell me. I'll figure out how to beat her on my own."  
  
"No, I'm being serious. You need to grab her breast-"  
  
"Ha!" Kachiko cut him off. "I know you and your kind. I thought you might be different, but I see I was wrong, you pervert. You're exactly like every other guy I met, and Yumi. You're just like every twisted manga artist out there."  
  
"What are you talking about?" Ranma asked.  
  
"As if you didn't know," Kachiko sniffed. "You're trying to set me up so you can see some erotic lesbian action."  
  
The accusation made Ranma's mouth nearly hit the floor. "I do not want to see any erotic lesbian action!" he bristled.  
  
Like magic words, the statement summoned a crowd of students as if they had appeared out of thin air. The boys were all incredibly interested, while the girls wore angry glares. All of them were united in their focus on who dared to utter such words.  
  
Ranma, realizing Kachiko was in full anger mode and either unaware or unconcerned with the gathering, tried to make her calm down with hand gestures.   
  
The motions only served to fuel Kachiko's anger. "Well I've got news for you, Mr. Saotome! I am not getting into any erotic lesbian action with Miss Hinako for you or anyone else! So you can keep your perverted fantasies to yourself!" Kachiko stomped off.  
  
Now the center of all the attention, Ranma looked with trepidation at the crowd. They stared at him in either admiration or ire, depending on the gender involved. Experience had taught him that was a very, very bad sign. "That wasn't what it sounded like. It was a misunderstanding."  
  
"You mean you don't want to see any erotic lesbian action?" one of the guys asked.  
  
"Of course not!" Ranma snapped back.  
  
"So you aren't interested in women?" Another asked.  
  
"Of course I am!" Ranma snapped back.  
  
A third said, "But most of the guys I know would love to get a chance to see two hot looking women going at it."  
  
"I'm not like that." Ranma insisted.  
  
"Ha! All men are into that twisted stuff." boasted one of the girls, who Ranma identified as Rurika. She turned to the group of men, who had segregated to one side of the corridor, leaving the girls on the opposite side, and making Ranma right in the middle between the two groups. "For instance, we'll take Sora over here." Rurika grabbed a tall, attractive girl and forced her to stand right next to her. She kept a hand around her waist, easily violating the girl's personal space. "Now, who among you den of wolves would like to see me rip off her clothes and run my tongue all over her nubile body?"  
  
Many of the hands shot up among the group of men.  
  
Rurika drew Sora closer, continuing as her voice dropped to a low, throaty rasp, "I would press my breasts against hers, kissing every inch of her body, our forms intertwining until they became one."  
  
More hands went up among them men, as did some among the group of women.  
  
Rurika gazed deeply into Sora's eyes. "I would show her carnal pleasures that only a woman can show another woman, making her scream in ecstasy for hours on end. How many would like to see such a sight?"  
  
Rurika turned her gaze to Ranma and pointed at the group of men. "Just as I thought. See what I mean?"  
  
Ranma turned to see that among the group of men, only he and one other didn't have their hands up. Suddenly put on the spot, Ranma sought safety in numbers, even if that number was only two. "Kyosuke doesn't have his hand up either."  
  
"He's gay," Rurika informed him.  
  
Kyosuke shrugged helplessly at Ranma. "Now if she had said you and Yoshi over there, sure, I could go for it."  
  
One of the guys towards the front spoke, "So if only gay guys don't want to see hot lesbian action, and Ranma doesn't want to see hot lesbian action, then obviously Ranma must be gay."  
  
Seeing a multitude of heads nod in both groups, and an interested gleam come to Kyosuke's eye, Ranma took action "I am not gay!"  
  
"So you want to see some erotic lesbian action?"  
  
"No."  
  
"It's got to be one or the other."  
  
Ranma cringed; he had to think fast, otherwise the rumors of him being both gay, as well as wanting to see some hot lesbian action, would run rampant throughout the school and then he'd never get any measure of peace. He'd have to say something, even if it was a lie, just to get them to back off and defuse the situation. "It's not that I'm gay, it's just that erotic lesbian action doesn't turn me on because... um, because, because..."   
  
And then he had it.  
  
"Because my female body is much hotter than any other girl's. So seeing two girls not as attractive as me getting it on wouldn't get me excited in the slightest." As the last word left his mouth, Ranma realized it was the one of the most stupid things he had ever said in his entire life.  
  
Silence reigned through both crowds. Then there was a quiet discussion among each group. Finally Rurika, Sora now clinging affectionately to her, said, "I've got it. Ranma is telling the truth. He's not gay, and he's not a pervert that's into erotic lesbian action, because he's completely narcissistic."  
  
Sensing an opportunity to get out of his dire predicament, Ranma nodded enthusiastically. "That's right. I'm narcissistic."   
  
It began at the front of both crowds and worked its way back. It took the form of people saying, "I knew it all the time," to "It was obvious from the beginning." Like a rock thrown in a pond, the ripples worked their way back until they reached the end and had nowhere else to go. With the 'truth' of the matter decided by unspoken popular consent, the crowds broke up and the topic was dropped in favor of other, more interesting rumors and speculations.  
  
Left alone in the hall, Ranma laughed hard. Ranma laughed deep. He had won one. He had actually talked his way out of a situation that should have been misinterpreted as him being a pervert. Being labeled a narcissist was a small price to pay compared to being called a pervert yet again. Of course it was a total fabrication:   
  
He had never smoked a day in his life.  
  
Oh yes, sometimes it was good to be Ranma Saotome.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko Tendou smiled to herself as she continued baiting the trap. Sometimes she was so brilliant she scared herself. "It's great to be me," she snickered, and laid down another piece of candy. Three more, and she was at the corner of the hall.  
  
Once around the corner, and making certain the last piece in plain sight from her vantage point, she raised the kendo stick she had borrowed from Kunou above her head and waited for Hinako come by and receive her just reward. The plan was foolproof because of its simplicity. A little surreptitious inquiry revealed Hinako had a major sweet tooth. That was her weakness, one Kachiko was eager to exploit. All she had to do was leave some candy lying around, and the walking parasite would be certain to gather it up. With her guard lowered as she scooped up the trail of sweets, she would come around the corner to the greedily suck down the last piece. Once her head came into view, Kachiko would brain her, and that would end once and for all the question of who the better woman was.  
  
Kachiko continued snickering to herself until the sound of the candy being picked up reached her ears. She remained silent, holding her breath in anticipation as the noise grew closer.   
  
The maker of the sound was almost upon Kachiko. She even stopped blinking for fear of losing her window of opportunity. The parasite was fast, and if she drew her coin first, the match would be over before it had begun.   
  
There was the unmistakable sound of the next to last piece being picked up. Kachiko's grip tightened until her knuckles turned white. The sound of wood straining reached her ears, and she hoped it didn't give away her position. She could hear the soft tread of a shoe. Just one more step.  
  
The lowered head came into view and Kachiko swung with all her might. The blow struck cleanly on the top of the head, producing a loud *crack* as wood made contact with hair, flesh and skull.  
  
Kachiko laughed, "Ha! I told you I'd kick your ass, Akane." The laughter died. "Akane?"  
  
Akane spun around in circles, completely disoriented from the unexpected blow. Her eyes whirled nearly as much as her body as she staggered back and forth like a drunken sailor riding on a nitro-fuel injected merry-go-round.  
  
"Ah, Akane! I'm so, so sorry!" Kachiko cried out as she grabbed her nominal daughter to keep her from running into anything, as well as preventing her from making Kachiko dizzy trying to follow the spinning motion.  
  
It took Akane several moments to reorient herself and gather her wits. Once she was able to focus, she shot her mother an evil glare. "What did you do that for?!"  
  
"It was an accident. Forgive me." Kachiko looked around until she realized she still clutched the kendo stick in hand. She held it out, as though it was a family's honor sword, and presented it to Akane. "As a measure of atonement, I insist you hit me."  
  
Akane tore the stick out of Kachiko's grasp and brought it down hard on top of her skull.   
  
It was the time-lost girl's turn to reel about. It took her less time than her daughter to reorient herself as she stopped spinning around, then turned on Akane. "What did you do that for?!"  
  
"Because you hit me in the head first and then you told me to," Akane said with no small measure of satisfaction.  
  
"But I'm your mother!" Kachiko snapped. "You were supposed to say, 'I could never hurt you, oh great and beautiful woman who brought me forth into this world', and then forgive me for hitting you. You weren't supposed to accept the stick and thump me in the head with it."  
  
"Tough luck. You weren't getting away with that one," Akane said icily. "And why were you lying in ambush and hitting people in the head anyway?"  
  
Using a conspiratory whisper, Kachiko said, "I wasn't aiming at you. I was laying in wait for Miss Hinako to come around."  
  
Akane held her hand to her head. "You drive me crazy. You're just as bad as Ranma on his worst days. Would you behave yourself and quit trying to attack Miss Hinako? Just let it go." Akane became fed up with the situation and walked off.   
  
"Oh yeah? Keep up that attitude and you'll end up grounded until you're seventeen! No, make that eighteen!" Kachiko shouted to her daughter's departing form.   
  
A voice from behind Kachiko said, "Excuse me, did you leave this candy in the hall?"  
  
Continuing to scowl at Akane's back, Kachiko turned slowly around as she snapped, "Yeah, what's it to you... Uh oh."  
  
The very adult Miss Hinako smirked. "Not only are you obnoxious, a delinquent, and a faithless tramp, but you're also a litterbug. And around here, litterbugs are punished. Here's to the environment. Happo No Coin Return!"  
  
Hinako formed a ring with her fingers and unleashed a blast of energy that hit Kachiko squarely in the chest. The time lost girl shot backward and into a wall, bounced off it, and struck a second wall before ending up embedded in it.   
  
The now youthful Miss Hinako gave a rousing cheer. "Yes, I got a bank shot! Oooo, candy!" She began picking up the fallen pieces, undid the wrappers, and greedily began stuffing them into her mouth.  
  
Still embedded in the wall, Kachiko weakly murmured, "I'm getting you for that one."  
  
xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Nabiki's eyes gleamed as Kunou stuffed her hand with the wad of cash. His eyes were not concerned with monetary matters, but rather on the prizes he held in his own hands.  
  
"So many striking pictures of the new lioness of passion in my life. Truly I am blessed with good fortune," he gushed. "Just look at the magnificent poses she has struck for my benefit alone."  
  
"You could say that," Nabiki agreed as she double-checked the amount. Not that she believed Kunou would cheat her, he might have been dense, but greed was not his forte. Still, he was so captivated by some of the more risqué photos that he might have miscounted some of the funds. But no, all was as it should be. "It was a pleasure doing business with you, Kunou-chan."  
  
Kunou turned his nose up at the appellation. "Nabiki Tendou, it ill-behooves you to try to catch my interest by being so familiar with me. Your sister and cousin already have my full attention, and even if they did not, I assure you I would still have no interest in you."  
  
"Gee, thanks." Nabiki said through a half-lidded stare. Just for that one the next batch would cost fifteen percent more. That was another thing added to the mental list of grievances Nabiki had tallied against her mother; she had become more popular than Nabiki in a matter of days. Not that Nabiki went out of her way to be popular, but there was a principle involved.   
  
However, Nabiki found she could not maintain any level of anger. It had been a truly blessed morning. Things had gone off even better than she had planned. Life was too good to be angry, especially now that she had finally recouped the monetary losses her mother had inflicted. And the best part of all was that Kachiko had been an unwitting pawn in the process. In addition to what had happened on the way to school, that put Nabiki ahead of the game.  
  
The realization she had won made her laugh. "No one can outfox Nabiki Tendou. Like any good car, she's an improvement over the previous model of Tendou." She rearranged the money in order, then pulled out her billfold to add it to her total. She rolled off the first five thousand yen bill...  
  
...And discovered that all that lay under the first bill was nothing more than a bunch of receipts.  
  
"AHHH!" Nabiki shouted, as incensed at being outwitted as the loss of money. She threw the worthless paper into the air. Kachiko was going to pay for this transgression. She would pay. The only question was how to go about it?  
  
Nabiki was still deep in thought when she glanced out the school gates and the answer presented itself to her. She casually walked over to the man busying himself next to the wall and said, "Could I borrow some of those extra posters you have there?"  
  
xxxxxxxxx  
  
Haroka Kiramitsu found herself becoming a statistic. She was just another ordinary, simple country girl trying to make it in the big city, only to find herself robbed at knife point in some dead end alley by an unshaven thug that smelled of cheap wine and month old grime and dirt.   
  
"Give me your purse," he snarled, hand shaking badly.  
  
Haroka started to hand it to him when a bolt of ebony energy blasted him in the side. The force of the bolt hurled him down the alleyway, limp like a broken doll. He struck the wall at the far end with a bone-crunching thud, then slid down into a heap at the base, motionless.  
  
Haroka turned in the direction of her savior. Four figures stood outlined by the light from the opening of the alley. Three were huge, the size of small trees, concealed within the confines of trenchoats and wide brimmed hats that rode low and hid their faces in shadow. The fourth figure, standing in the front of the quartet, was the exact opposite. He was of normal stature, with a widow's peak of oily black hair. He appeared to be in his late twenties, and wore an impeccable suit obviously military in design. A number of decorations adorned his left breast. There was a palpable air of sophistication about him.  
  
"Thank you for saving me," Haroka said to the man as she collected her wits.  
  
He bowed. "My pleasure."  
  
"If there is anything I can do for you, name it," she said.  
  
"I'd like to borrow your soul. Well, no, borrowing implies it'll be returned to you, which it most assuredly won't."  
  
"Actually I was thinking of something more along the lines of a date," Haroka admitted.  
  
"Oh, where are my manners?" The man said. "Allow me to properly introduce myself. I am General Formica, formerly commander of her Royal Majesty Queen Serenity's Royal Bodyguard, now contracting out as an enforcer for the Greater Demon Kangar-Oo. And yes, in answer to your unspoken question, he does look like a demonic marsupial. However, he is quite capable of laying this entire city to waste should he feels so inclined, and I warn you he becomes irritable when people point it out since he doesn't see the resemblance."  
  
Haroka Kiramitsu sighed as she found herself becoming yet another statistic. An ordinary, simple country girl trying to make it in the big city, only to find her soul consumed by some demonic power. She knew she should have stayed in the country. Out there the only thing out of the ordinary she had to worry about was when Totoro took a monster crap in her yard. "I assume he wants my soul as energy to fuel some device which will let him rule or destroy the universe?"  
  
Formica shook his head. "No. He merely collects souls the way people do stamps. It's just a hobby. He has neither nihilistic tendencies nor a desire to rule anything. All things considered, he is a bit lazy for a Greater Demon. But the pay is good and you wouldn't believe the benefits package. The succubi really go for the suit as well." He adjusted his lapel slightly.  
  
"You do cut the dashing figure," Haroka agreed.  
  
"Thank you," Formica said as he and his followers drew closer. His left hand began to glow. "Now, be a good girl and hold still, will you? I wouldn't want to blow off a limb. It's murder getting the bloodstains out of this uniform, let me tell you."  
  
Just as Formica was about to unleash his soul devouring blast, he suddenly became aware of a presence behind him. He turned to see a huge stranger hidden within the confines of a tattered brown cloak. "Oh dear. You have the earmarks of a hero that intends to save this girl from harm."  
  
The man strode forward at a slow but deliberate pace.  
  
Formica said, "I see. The strong silent type." He turned to his three minions. "Oh, boys."  
  
The trio's hats and trenchcoats shredded, revealing their true monstrous forms. They were all youma of various types. One appeared to have a huge vat of bubbling clear fluid attached to its purple back and a couple of hoses leading to sprayers embedded on the backs of its hands. A second one, gray in color, had two huge guns for its arms, as well as a number of smaller openings across the front of its body. The third was silvery and hard to look at, since there seemed to be nothing but razor sharp edges to it.  
  
Formica pointed at the trio. "Allow me to introduce Scald, Buckshot, and Scalpel. Unlike my idiotic compatriots, I have analyzed the tactics of past youmas. My conclusion was they always lost miserably because they tended to be stupid and their powers were based on ridiculous things, like pastries and computers and such. Therefore I have created smart youma whose powers are based on inherently dangerous things. You see, I'm not the moron those other generals were. Not only have I survived my contemporaries, but I have thrived. You shall learn this firsthand, tall dark and silent. Buckshot!"  
  
The one with the guns for arms immediately opened fire. The air was filled with thunder as from every opening bullets poured forth, forming a hail of gunpowder driven metal that would have reduced a tank to scrap within seconds.   
  
In the case of the tall stranger, the bullets merely bounced off, not even making him break stride.   
  
Buckshot ceased fire and looked to his leader for orders.  
  
Formica shrugged. "Obviously he's bulletproof. He looks like he needs a bath. Scald!"  
  
The one with the water on his back stepped forward and unleashed a torrent of superheated water that was as close to evaporation as possible. The powerful streams struck the man squarely, raising a cloud of steam that turned the alley into a sauna.   
  
Formica indicated Scald should stop. The youma did so. The General than looked down at his suit. "Oh bother. The heat made it wilt. Now I have to get it, eh?" He looked more closely at the steam.  
  
Emerging from the cloud, the man continued striding without adjusting his pace.  
  
Formica appeared impressed. "Heat resistant too. Scalpel!"  
  
The one composed of edges ran forward, sun glistening off his razor body as he headed directly toward the intruder.   
  
In response, the man simply took another step.  
  
Scalpel struck the man with a body block, the surface of his skin slicing at his opponent with a thousand different blades.  
  
The sound was deafening as the youma literally shattered into a thousand pieces.   
  
A glow began to emit from Formica's hands. "Obviously he's a bit more powerful than those silly girls in the fukus. We will attack him en masse. Buckshot! Scald! Charge!"  
  
Formica noted that the two did indeed obey his orders to the letter, if not their intent, as they charged in the opposite direction. Buckshot unleashed a volley that changed the dead end to a throughway that allowed the pair to escape.  
  
Formica watched their retreating forms. "I see why the others made stupid youma. Much more loyal." He turned to the stranger. "Very well. Rather than hold back, I shall unleash my greatest attack. The Hand of Death."  
  
This time the stranger responded by bringing up both hands. As the cloak retreated from his bare arms, heavily corded muscle could be seen, indicating a strength that could shatter stone merely by flexing.  
  
Formica decided to mirror the stranger's attitude, which he had to admit was pretty cool, and charged.   
  
The stranger pointed forward with his index fingers.  
  
"Now fall!" Formica shouted.  
  
Before Formica could bring his hand forward to throw his palm strike, the stranger lashed out so blindingly fast that it appeared he struck a thousand times instead of one. As his hands blurred, he shouted, "YATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATA ATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATAT."  
  
And then it was over.  
  
Haroka looked in amazement at the results of the stranger's handiwork. "I've never seen someone poked to death like that before. You didn't even break the skin. You just... poked him."  
  
"I don't like getting blood on the outfit," the stranger admitted.  
  
Haroka looked the man over. "I might regret saying this, since I certainly do the last time I said it, but if there's anything I can do for you, name it. Except giving you my soul or dating you. I don't go for the strong silent type."  
  
"Where is Kachiko Tendou?" the stranger asked.  
  
Haroka thought about that. "Can't say I know the name. The only Tendous I know live the next district over in Nerima. I worked as a take out girl for a while there and became familiar with the area. I can give you the address if you want."  
  
"Yes, Kachiko Tendou is in Nerima," the man said, a decidedly disturbing smile now decorating his features.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko made her way through the halls, heading to the locker room showers. Being blasted into the masonry made her body ache, as well as collecting a good bit of dirt and grime from the shattered remains of the wall. She needed to clean off, even if it meant missing the start of her next class. As she walked, a constant litany of grumbling followed in her wake. It wasn't fair that the oversized brat (or was that undersized bitch?) kept winning. All Kachiko had done was try to defend her honor, which had been compromised once by being beaten and a second time for the implication that she would have anything to do with old perverts. It would have been fine if she had gotten some measure of revenge, but somehow that blasted Hinako was always ferreting out the complex plans set against her and not only evading them, but coming out on top. Wasn't there justice in the world?  
  
"It's all that darn Nabiki's fault for siccing the giant leech on me," Kachiko grumbled. She was going to have to figure out a way to get even with that devious middle daughter of hers. No one could outfox Kachiko Tendou, not when it really mattered. Not some watered down version of her, not some walking parasite, and no one else who came along and thought they were top dog.   
  
Thoughts of revenge fell from Kachiko's mind as the world was reeling and she suddenly became dizzy and disoriented. It was similar to when she was knocked off the fence by Ranma, except several times worse. She barely had enough sense to fall against the wall and use it to support her as she slumped towards the ground. Her hands scraped against the wall trying to find a purchase, but they failed and all her fingers did was scratch against inset tiles. She slid to the floor, ending up on her hands and knees.  
  
Then just as it seemed she would never stop spinning, the world righted itself again. Kachiko shook her head a few times, not daring to rise at first. However, once it became evident the bout of vertigo had passed and left no lingering traces, she stood up and reassessed herself.   
  
Finding nothing wrong, she said, "Must have been some leftover effect from that brat's draining." Not quite trusting her balance, she kept one hand on the wall as she continued on her way to the school showers.  
  
No further incidents occurred, nor did Kachiko encounter anyone else in the halls. It looked like she was going to be late and forced to hold buckets outside class. Maybe she could use her draining victim status to have the school nurse write up an excuse. She figured it was worth a shot as she entered the girls' locker room.   
  
The locker room was just as Kachiko hoped: completely empty. The last gym class must have finished dressing and already headed out. That was for the best, since she had no desire for anyone to see the results of her humiliating temporary setback.  
  
It took only a moment for Kachiko to strip and enter the showers. She walked down a row of shower heads and stopped at the fourth one. She noted that the sprayers had changed in design, and the shower itself had been completely redone in a tasteful light blue instead of the abysmal gray from when she had attended the school. Back then showering had always carried a dour pall considering the depressing color scheme. Actually the entire school had been colored very blandly. Principal Faust had been of the opinion that bright colors made for active students, and active students made trouble. But bland colors made for depressed students, which made for a more sedate student body. Principal Faust liked sedate students, since it was less likely they would make a run for it.  
  
But everything had changed. This Beach Bum Principal liked bright, vivid colors and the whole school had an underlying tropical motif. Such an environment made the atmosphere much more pleasant. Now school officials didn't go about dressed in oppressive-looking military garb that seemed to be the standard for most military regimes. There were no scantily clad, ridiculously over-endowed, and grossly powerful female enforcers monitoring the halls. No security system that tried to trace a student's location the moment they stepped on school property. Everything was all better. It was like a tropical paradise compared to the gulag it was before. That the students still insisted on grumbling about it made Kachiko realize just how much kids took for granted nowadays.   
  
Turning her thoughts from the past, Kachiko spun the knob on the shower. Within moments a spray of warm water hit her body. That, combined with the cheerier color, delighted the girl and she began humming to herself as she relaxed and let her body counter whatever lingering effect Hinako's technique had left.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ukyou thumped her chest and gave a hacking cough. It was just her rotten luck that the teacher had asked her to stay behind and help him put away some school supplies. And if having to go to gym class late wasn't bad enough, the teacher slipped and dropped a box full of dusty erasers right on her nice school uniform, which was now covered in a healthy coating of white chalk that contrasted the dark material quite nicely. To make matters worse, the dust was irritating her nose, making her sound like she had developed pneumonia. At least she was finished with returning all of the supplies and could catch up with the rest of her classmates.  
  
Another fit of coughing passed. Ukyou was relived that this bout wasn't as bad as the others. Still, she wanted to get out of her clothes and into a clean shirt and shorts and breathe some fresh air.  
  
Ukyou entered the girl's locker room and headed toward a locker. She paused in front of it, the sound of a shower running gaining her attention. Curiosity aroused, she walked over to see who had decided to take a shower before gym class instead of afterwards.   
  
Only able to see a partial profile of the girl --due to the amount of steam and heavy flow of water-- Ukyou could just make out the familiar form of Akane. The girl was obviously unaware of Ukyou's presence as she was fully immersed in enjoying the way the water was cleansing her body. Showering before class was odd, but then Ukyou knew from experience that Akane could be really strange sometimes.   
  
Ukyou was about to leave Akane to her own devices when she paused to consider something. She ran a finger along her cheek and came up with a smudge of white. That was all the convincing it took. She decided to catch Akane's attention, "Hey, there. I'll join you in a minute."  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko turned her head in shock, took one look at the person who had stated they were going to 'join' her in the shower, then screamed at the top of her lungs, "AHHHHHH! PERVERT!"  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The entire gym class turned its head at the scream of terror. It was followed a moment later by the sound of the earth trembling as one of the walls outside the girls' locker room detonated in an explosion of plastic, metal, and cement. All eyes followed a dark projectile that came hurtling out from the center of the explosion. It kicked up a cloud of dust and rock as it skidded along the ground like a missile whose engine had malfunctioned, urging it forward while never being able to reach the sky. The laws of gravity and inertia worked in conjunction to halt the object, forcing it to skid to a stop a short distance away from the ogling gym class. A low, pain-filled moan came from the prone figure's dust obscured form.  
  
A second projectile came shooting out of the breach in the side of the building. This one moved upright and with much better control over its direction than the last one. It stopped above the prone figure in the dirt, revealing itself to be Kachiko Tendou. She was clad only in a small towel that just barely stretched past the bottom of her posterior and only made its way slightly above the halfway point of her breasts.  
  
Forced to keep the towel from conceding the uphill territory it occupied by holding it in place with her arms, Kachiko was restricted to administering her 'righteous' punishment by bringing her foot up and down repeatedly on the prone figure. Every pair of male eyes in the class were riveted to the pedal action. Having no slack, each time Kachiko's leg went up, the bottom of the towel crawled up her body almost high enough to show what goods it was supposedly trying to hide.  
  
Kachiko abruptly stopped stomping as she sensed the eyes attuned to her body. She looked up, focusing on one youth in the entire class. Her demeanor switched from rage to tears as she shouted, "Ranma, protect me!" She ran to him and cowered behind his body, using it as a shield between her and the prone figure.   
  
Ranma became all too aware of the towel's inadequate thickness as Kachiko pressed herself against him and shivered. Judging by what was poking him in the back, he could personally guarantee she was either cold or excited. He extricated himself from her before someone got the wrong idea. "What's going on?"  
  
Kachiko sobbed, "I was in the locker room minding my own business, cleaning up to help me recover from the brat's unprovoked attack, when that pervert came right in and told me he was going to molest me in the shower." She pointed to the face down figure. However, in order to point, she had to remove one of her hands from her top. That gave Ranma a clear view of most of what was there, the really important parts hidden by only the slimmest of margins. What he could see indicated that while Hinako did indeed have plenty of room to brag, Kachiko was far from being a 'little girl' in that sense of the word. That towel really needed to be several centimeters larger. Like about twenty.  
  
Ranma turned his eyes away before someone, most likely Akane, realized he had almost been given a free show. He looked into Kachiko's eyes to see that she did indeed seem to be genuinely frightened rather than it being some scheme. Protective instincts rising to the fore, he promised, "Don't worry. I'll take care of the pervert."  
  
Everyone watched as Ranma approached the figure, who was only now starting to rise. He paused in front of it and said, "Okay, pal. Here's where you get yours for trying to force yourself on girls in the locker... oh, it's you, Ucchan. What are you doing here?"  
  
Ukyou shot an irritated look at Ranma as she finally summoned the strength to rise to her feet. "I got attacked for no damn reason."  
  
Ranma nodded in understanding. "Yeah, I'm sure it's a mistake. You aren't beat up too bad, are you?"  
  
Ukyou brushed off some of the dirt that had joined the chalk stains on her uniform. "No. It's just superficial."  
  
Seeing her much wanted vengeance not coming about, Kachiko stomped her foot and shouted, "Ranma, what are you doing talking to that pervert? Beat him up for trying to molest me!"  
  
Ranma gave a dismissive wave to her. "Don't be silly. I'm not going to beat up Ucchan. We're friends."  
  
"I see how it is!" Kachiko fumed. "Since that pervert's your friend, you're going to let what he tried to do to me go unpunished since you don't think he did anything wrong. Well, I've got news for you, Mr. Saotome. I don't care how close we are, I am not some bicycle that you can let all your perverted friends hop on for a ride. Your other girlfriends might be loose enough to share their bodies with everyone you know, but I am not that way!"  
  
Seeing the effect the words had on his classmates, Ranma paled at the accusation. "What are you talking about?!"  
  
Hiroshi and Daisuke moved up to Ranma's side. Anger was evident on both their faces.   
  
Hiroshi made a fist and shook it in Ranma's direction. "Ranma, how could you be so cruel?"  
  
"Yeah, I thought we were buddies," Daisuke agreed. "If you were sharing your girlfriends with other guys, you should have given us first crack."  
  
Tears of anguish coursed down Hiroshi's face. "I would have loved to share Shampoo with you."  
  
Daisuke said, "Akane would have been my first choice." He felt an aura of anger emit from the direction of the gym class. Suddenly sweating, he said, "Did I say Akane? Ha ha. Silly me. I meant Kodachi."  
  
"I'm not sharing anyone with anybody!" Ranma protested.   
  
"And why didn't either of you mention me?" Ukyou snapped.  
  
Hiroshi brought up his fist and pointed it at Ranma, "I'm afraid we can't let this pass, can we Dai?"  
  
"Nope," Daisuke said in agreement, cracking his knuckles. "Ranma has to answer for this crime."  
  
Both tried to uppercut him just like they had seen all of the other girls do when they were angered by his actions.   
  
Ranma effortlessly caught both their fists. "Like I'm going to let you two morons hit me." Ranma then decided to take out some of his frustration on them.  
  
"You're beating up the wrong people! The pervert's next to you! Beat him up," Kachiko insisted.  
  
Akane walked up to her mother. "Kachi, Ukyou's not a boy. She's really a girl."  
  
Kachiko looked at Akane in shock. "Then that makes it even worse. At least if she was a man she would be following her normal impulses. But not only is she a pervert, she's a sexual deviant as well."  
  
"I am not a sexual deviant! I only like guys!" Ukyou retorted.  
  
"Then why did you try to molest me in the shower?"  
  
"I thought you were Akane," Ukyou snapped.  
  
A knowing light came on in Kachiko's eyes. "Oh, I see now. You were trying to molest Akane."  
  
Ukyou nodded her head. "Yes, that's ri... No! I mean, I was trying to take a shower with her, but I wasn't trying to molest her."  
  
Kachiko nodded her head. "Oh. So it's not molestation. It's consensual between the two of you." Kachiko turned to Akane and placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "Akane, I don't care about your sexual preferences. You'll always be family to me." She then turned to Ranma and shouted, "Ranma, Akane's come out of the closet and is going to go out with her lesbian friend from now on, so we can start dating and she won't be able to complain anymore."  
  
"What?!" Ranma ceased exerting force on the headlock that was slapped on Hiroshi and stopped stomping on the fallen Daisuke.  
  
"I am not a lesbian, and I am not interested in Ukyou!" Akane snapped.  
  
"And neither am I," Ukyou agreed.   
  
Kachiko looked at the pair in confusion. "So you hop in the shower with Akane as a sort of heterosexual casual sex thing?"  
  
"There is no sex involved!" Ukyou shrieked.   
  
"I'm getting some seriously mixed signals here," Kachiko admitted.   
  
Akane said in a tired voice, "Ukyou is straight. She just dresses like a boy since she swore off her femininity and went to a boy's school and kind of acts like a guy. And she confused you with me, which meant she thought she was jumping in the shower with me." Akane thought about that for a moment. She turned to Ukyou. "That does sound kind of perverted. Why did you want to jump in the shower with me?"  
  
Ukyou was trembling with anger as she said, "I was dirty. That's the only reason."  
  
"More like an excuse," Kachiko said with a suspicious glare. "I know your kind. You're another perverted crossdressing lesbian, just like Yumi was. Well, I got my eye on you, Little Miss 'Let me join you in the shower while I leave the lesbian sex part unsaid'. You come too close to me, and you'll be sorry, just like Yumi was. I always kicked her butt when she tried to lure me into her world of perversion. Except the time she stole my clothing and I had to dress like a boy since her outfits were the only ones around. And then there was the time me and her had our clothing disintegrated and ended up falling on top of one another right in front of the entire student body. And there was the one instance where she tricked me into going out on a date with another girl whom I had a really good time with, but only in a platonic way, even if she did give me a good night kiss on the lips. But she didn't get past first base. Aside from those times, and a handful of others that are too numerous to mention, I showed her a thing or two. No one outsmarts Kachiko Tendou."  
  
Seeing everyone staring at her peculiarly, Kachiko announced, "I'm going to finish my shower now. And no crossdressers are allowed!" She turned and headed towards the hole in the wall.  
  
Akane stared at her departing mother. "Okay, maybe I understand why she's so touchy about crossdressers."  
  
Xxxxxxxxx  
  
It was after gym class (when Kachiko was no longer anywhere near the showers) that Akane and Ukyou finally had a chance to clean themselves off. Akane noted that the other girls were giving them a wide berth, and that Akane wasn't all that comfortable with Ukyou seeking her out while they were showering. Not that she thought Ukyou was interested in her, even if she did seem to enjoy having an effeminate guy like Konatsu hanging around her. Just because she had a man that made for a very good-looking girl living under the same roof didn't mean Ukyou had any deviant tendencies. She wanted Ranma, after all. Ranma who could change into a girl.   
  
Hmm. Maybe Kachiko was on to something.  
  
"Are you listening to me, Akane?"  
  
The question snapped Akane out of her pondering. Reflexively she covered her private parts up. "What was that?"  
  
Ukyou did not seem to notice the movement. "I said I can't believe your cousin. Half the class is looking at me like they believe what she said."  
  
"Well, you do dress as a guy all the time, and this isn't an all boys school," Akane pointed out.  
  
Ukyou appeared bewildered by the statement. "I think I look good in a guy's outfit. Don't you think so?"  
  
Akane suddenly felt very uncomfortable. Why was Ukyou asking if she thought she was attractive? "I never noticed."  
  
Ukyou looked over her shoulder and down her back. "I think dresses make my butt look big. You don't think my butt's big, do you?" She turned around and thrust her posterior slightly out for Akane to inspect.  
  
That was bad. Somehow they had moved to assessing parts of Ukyou body. Akane never assessed parts of any girl's body. Not even Ranma's. "I hadn't noticed. Um, nice weather we're having."  
  
"Actually it's been muggy and overcast," Ukyou said. "You know, I will admit, it's starting to get pretty uncomfortable with the chest bindings lately." Ukyou handled her breasts. "Do you think my bust's gotten bigger?"  
  
"All done showering," Akane announced and headed out. Much to her chagrin, Ukyou followed.   
  
"How do you do it?" Ukyou asked as Akane began to dress.  
  
"I don't wear chest bindings so I don't think I can give you advice on them," Akane said nervously.  
  
"I mean your cousin. How do you put up with her?"  
  
"Oh," Akane said, relieved, even if it meant the topic of conversation was her mother. "It's easier than you think."  
  
"She's caused nothing but trouble since she got here," Ukyou said. "She's getting into fights with Miss Hinako. She actually thinks Kunou's cute. And she's openly after Ranma. I saw the way she rubbed her body against his when she tried to get him to do her dirty work for her."  
  
"She was pretty close to him," Akane admitted, a dark mood clouding her features.  
  
"And she does it openly when she know one of his fiancee's is right there too. Doesn't she have any sense of shame?"  
  
"No, no she doesn't," Akane admitted, her mood darkening further.   
  
Ukyou seemed unaware of the change as she continued her own litany of anger. "I know if she was living under my roof and hit on my Ranchan she'd be out on the street in no time, cousin or not."  
  
"It's... not that simple," Akane said.  
  
"You shouldn't be that forgiving of her, Akane. I know I won't be. The next time she hits on Ranchan in front of me, I'm giving her a piece of my mind. And you might want to consider doing the same." Ukyou finished dressing and headed out of the locker room.  
  
Akane was in no hurry as she dressed. A lot of what Ukyou said made sense, and repeated many of the doubts Akane had held in her mind; one's she had not dared give voice to, since it was her mother she was thinking about.  
  
In the beginning, it was easy enough to think of it as a phase Kachiko was going through as she reoriented herself to her new time. She didn't understand the proper scheme of things and how they worked. She didn't realize she was already married and had a family. Ranma was his usual kind self, and Kachiko had simply latched onto him as a way of helping her cope with the sudden changes she had undergone. But Akane had been operating under the assumption that Kachiko would straighten out and rekindle her marriage with her husband. Instead, she was pulling farther away from him and acting continuously like a teenager that had been allowed to live on her own for the first time in her life. And worse, every time it was explained Ranma was a taken man, she ignored it and went after him anyway. Just like Shampoo, Kodachi, and even Ukyou.  
  
Akane finished dressing and headed out of the locker room. Maybe Ukyou was right. Maybe it was time to stop turning a blind eye to all of this and set things straight with her mother. Ranma was Akane's fiancee. His marrying someone else was not up for grabs, even if Kachiko had tricked the fathers into agreeing with it. She not only had no business hitting on someone else's fiancee, as well as the high school idiot, but she should have been where she belonged; with the man she had married, loved, and brought forth a family into this world. Akane could see that every day her father went without his beloved wife, the more it hurt him. In some ways, he was almost as much a basketcase as when Kachiko had first died. It wasn't fair to her father, Kasumi, Nabiki or herself. It wasn't fair that Kachiko was who they had always wanted, but refused to act like it. And it wasn't fair she was trying to take Ranma away, as well as denying the role of mother to a family that needed one.  
  
On the other hand, taking that sort of attitude with Kachiko might very well alienate her, and Akane didn't want that. She could already see how much Nabiki didn't get along with her, and the feeling was assuredly returned on Kachiko's part. Akane didn't know how she would react if her mother dealt with her so angrily. They were friends of a sort. It wasn't the ideal relationship Akane had wanted, but it was better than avoidance or outright hatred.  
  
Part of the responsibility lay with Ranma. It was his fault Akane was being placed in the position that she had to warn her mother off and possibly alienate her for life. If he would just be a man and forcefully tell Kachiko to leave him alone and that Akane was his fiancee and no other girl was, that would end everything. But in his typical wishy-washy manner, he refused to risk hurting Kachiko's feelings, and just acted evasive rather than decisive. And staring at Kachiko's breasts like he had outside when she was trying to get him to beat up Ukyou only encouraged that sort of behavior. Acting interested by staring and blushing at other girls' breasts was not the way a fiancé was supposed to act. There was only one person he was supposed to be interested in. But because he almost never acted like he was interested in Akane, it made everyone think he was up for grabs.   
  
And then there was possibly the worst of all: his agreeing to delay any marriage. True, Akane didn't want to get married now, but that he would openly state such a thing, knowing it would only complicate matters, showed how self-centered he was. Akane knew he was egotistical, but he had always tried to help others when they were in need. Now Akane was in need, and he was ignoring that need by saying he didn't want to get married to her. Even if it was only in a temporary sense, it still hurt, especially after Mount Phoenix and what they shared. After that all the barriers should have been gone. So why was he putting up more? And why couldn't he just make Kachiko stop pursuing him?   
  
Akane was growing increasingly angry with Ranma's blundering when a voice said, "Miss Tendou?"  
  
Akane turned to see the young form of Hinako before her. Akane's first impulse was to walk in the other direction, since the teacher's tracking Akane down undoubtedly had something to do with Kachiko. But then she noticed an uncharacteristic look of concern on the teacher's features; a very unusual thing in her younger form. "What is it, Miss Hinako?"  
  
"I need to talk to you about your new stepmother."  
  
Akane truly dreaded this. She wondered if revealing the truth about Kachiko might be the best thing to do. Hinako might let the matter drop if she knew Kachiko really was Akane's long lost mother, but that would make things even more awkward in school. No, it was best to continue the charade. "What about her?"  
  
Hinako wrung her hands in nervousness. "You don't like her much, do you?"  
  
Now that was an awkward question. "Oh, she's okay."  
  
"I didn't mean as a person. I meant as a stepmother. She's not very motherly at all. In fact, she acts more like a juvenile delinquent than any sort of parental figure."  
  
Akane laughed, pity lacing it. That was way closer to the truth than Hinako realized. "I'll admit, no matter how hard we try, she doesn't act very responsibly."  
  
"And then there's the way she chases after Mr. Saotome and Mr. Kunou. Admittedly, delinquents are drawn to other delinquents, but she's married to the most wonderful, caring man in the world. Yet she's openly cheating on him and trying to take on two other lovers at the same time. Why, I heard her threaten to ground you for trying to defend me."  
  
"Yeah," was all Akane could get out. She felt nauseated at Kachiko's actions as well.  
  
"She looks just like your mother did at that age, doesn't she?"  
  
Akane's blood nearly froze in her veins. Had Hinako somehow stumbled onto the truth? "I'm not sure what you're getting at." Neither an admission nor a denial of the accusation. The answer would have done Nabiki proud.  
  
Hinako nodded as though Akane had responded to the question with the expected answer. "I thought as much. That would explain why Soun-chan would marry someone who's so young and unsuitable for him. At first I thought it was some form of mind-control or blackmail that made him marry her. Maybe even something involving money, but you've been going along with it easily. That meant he must have married her willingly."  
  
"He did," Akane confirmed, really hoping Hinako would let the matter drop.   
  
The teacher continued. "It probably would have been best if you had stopped him, but I suppose it would have been a bit much for you. I know how badly you wanted your real mother back from the last time I tried to romance your father. Settling for someone who looked like her was probably the closest you could come to getting the real thing back, so you accepted her."  
  
The words hit far too close to home. Akane was barely able to keep from exclaiming Kachiko was the real thing. Except, even though she was, she refused to act like it.  
  
Hinako continued. "Your father made a horrible mistake, and it's my fault for backing off and letting his unhealthy preoccupation about the past consume him. Cherishing the memories of those lost to us is good and normal, but obsessing about them until you sacrifice your present and future is wrong. Soun's made a terrible mistake, and I care about him too much to let it stand and ruin his life. I'm not giving up without a fight."  
  
Declaration made, Hinako turned and set off with a determination that Akane had never associated with her flighty younger form.   
  
What Akane wanted to do was tell Hinako she was wrong, her father would be happy with her mother, and it was all just a matter of time before things returned to their natural state and they could be one big happy family. All they needed was time and things would turn out just like she wished for. But the words Hinako spoke carried too much of truth to them. Instead, Akane found herself more unsettled than ever after the speech.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi heard a knock on the door. She stopped cleaning and answered it. At the threshold stood a large man in a cloak and hood.   
  
"Kachiko Tendou," the man said.  
  
Kasumi shook her head. "She isn't here right now. She's at school. Why are you looking for her?"  
  
The man's eyes blazed as they stared down at the girl. "I have something to... give her."  
  
A delivery person. Well that made sense. "Perhaps you can leave it here and I can give it to her."  
  
"No. It is something I must deliver... personally." He unleashed a smile, one that was all teeth and seemed closer to a grimace than a sign of delight.  
  
Kasumi shrugged and gave the man directions to the school.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko looked at herself in the mirror, mindful that no crossdressing perverts were trying to insinuate themselves in the lavatory while she was implementing her latest scheme. This plan was foolproof. She would render Hinako powerless, then serve up a big helping of retribution that she so richly deserved. It would be the perfect end to an otherwise lousy day. Being alternately drained and blasted, dealing with crossdressing lesbian perverts, being almost naked in front of an entire gym class, Ranma not meting out violence to the perpetrator of her near dishonor like a proper love interest should, corn beef and hash served at lunch, all of it was too much for one poor, lonely girl to take. Even Tachi-chan hadn't been able to cheer her up, despite serenading her with poetry. At least when Ranma stumbled on the scene he had acted jealous and pounded on Tachi-chan and ordered him to leave her alone. Displays like that gave her renewed hope that Ranma would overcome his shyness toward admitting his feelings to the opposite sex.  
  
However now was not the time for romance, now was the time for revenge. Kachiko adjusted the mustache and inch thick, horn-rimmed glasses once again. Perfect. Mistress of disguise that she was, Hinako would never recognize Kachiko. Not until it was far too late.  
  
"I'm too smart for the likes of that brat," Kachiko bragged to her image in the mirror. She turned and exited the lavatory. If she timed it right, she could run into Hinako during her free period. That would give Kachiko forty-five minutes to indulge herself without the risk of interruption.   
  
Kachiko emerged into the hall, swaggering in confidence at her newly created anonymity. She hummed to herself as she made her way to Hinako's chambers.  
  
Everyone's eyes remained fixed on her as she strolled past.   
  
Two floors down, Kachiko found herself slightly disoriented. Apparently they had reconstructed part of the wing in this section of the school. Gone were the biolabs of the past in favor of more standard areas of sciences less esoteric than 'Recombining DNA,' and 'Bio-Symbiote Crossbreeding.'   
  
Kachiko tapped a student on the shoulder. "Where's room 10-C?"  
  
He gave her a mystified look, but hesitantly answered. "Make a left."  
  
"Thanks." Kachiko walked on, leaving the student watching her wake.  
  
The student's directions were correct as Kachiko found herself in front of the room. She knocked on the door, and was delighted to hear a high-pitched voice say, "Enter."  
  
Kachiko walked in, making certain to close the door behind her. She would have locked it, save that she didn't have the key . Still, Miss Hinako was far from the most popular teacher, which meant the chance of someone coming in was slight. Deepening her voice, Kachiko said, "I need some help only you can provide, Miss Hinako."  
  
The young Hinako looked up from the test she was grading and took note of her visitor. She gave a bewildered look and said, "Miss, what is that thing on your lip?"  
  
Kachiko was about to ask Hinako what she meant by 'Miss', when she looked down to see that in her quest for perfecting the perfect disguise, she had paid sole attention to her face and none to her garments.   
  
She was still in her female student uniform.   
  
Thinking fast, Kachiko said, "Ah, hairlip problem. Is it noticeable?"  
  
Hinako sweatdropped. "No, no it isn't," she said quickly. "What can I do to help you? Shaving gel and a razor?"  
  
"No, no, nothing like that." Kachiko assured her. "I just need some change."  
  
"All right, I'll be glad to help." Hinako went for her change pocket.  
  
Kachiko brought out a bill. "It's for ten thousand yen."  
  
Hinako stopped bringing out the coins. "I don't think I have that much."  
  
"Whatever you have will do," Kachiko assured her. "It's important. I need to make a phone call to Uruguay."  
  
"I have a calling card," Hinako said, starting for another pocket.  
  
"The telephone is broken and only takes money," Kachiko quickly countered  
  
Eager to help a student in need, Hinako emptied her pockets and counted the change in her hand. "I'm sorry, I only have three thousand five hundred and seventy yen."  
  
"That'll do!" Kachiko forced the bill into Hinako's hand and grabbed all of the coinage.  
  
"I don't want to short change you," Hinako said.  
  
Kachiko spoke in her true voice as she snickered. "Don't worry. I'll be taking the difference out on your hide." She tore off the mustache and glasses.   
  
Hinako recoiled and said in painfully over-dramatic fashion. "It's you."  
  
Kachiko grimaced in pain at having ripped off the mustache that had been glued to her upper lip. At least it would take care of her hairlip problem for a while. Bringing the pain under control, she unleashed her 'predator finally having cornered its prey' smile. "Indeed. You are now at my mercy, and I'm afraid I had all my mercy drained out of me today by a tiny leech."  
  
Hinako stood her ground. Defiant, she stated, "It doesn't matter. I'll never let you have Soun-chan."  
  
That made Kachiko recoil. "Don't gross me out by implying the fight is over him, or I just might let you go. This is all about my pound of flesh."  
  
"Even if you add a pound of flesh to your breasts, it still won't make a difference. You'd need at least five pounds to make them a reasonable size," Hinako stated.  
  
Kachiko gave the little girl a dark glare. "Oh, you're really going to get it for that one."  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane hurried through the halls, anger over her mother's behavior forgotten as more important matters had come to her attention. Matters that had to be taken care of right away. Her mother had to be warned of what had happened.   
  
Ranma spotted Akane as she hurried past. Noting her distress, he turned to catch up with her. "What's going on?"  
  
"This." Akane stuffed a paper she had been carrying in his face.  
  
Ranma read it. "Shoot, that's not good."  
  
"Someone posted them all over the school. I've been taking them down as I come across them, but I think the damage might have been done."  
  
"We'd better find Kachi and warn her," Ranma agreed.   
  
The two went down to the first floor and began asking students if they had seen Kachiko. A small percentage of them, bored, decided to follow. The pair had a sizable group accompanying them when one of the students they interrogated answered, "Yes, I told her where room 10-C was. But there was something strange. She seemed to have a bad hairlip problem."  
  
"It runs in the family. Kasumi has it the worst," Akane admitted.  
  
Ranma said, "Yeah, I noticed you had one too when we met, but I didn't think you'd appreciate me pointing it ou-"  
  
An elbow delivered to the gut ended Ranma's commentary on Akane's less feminine genetic traits.   
  
"We have to find her," Akane emphasized.   
  
The pair, with the group in tow, walked up to the door to 10-C. Akane threw open the door and thrust the poster forward. "Bad News, Kachi. Some anti-pervert group is passing these posters around claiming you're suspected of engaging in perverted acts with... young... children."  
  
All eyes looked past Akane to see what was occurring in the room to bring her to such an abrupt halt.   
  
Kachiko was sitting on a chair, pinning a squirming Hinako over her lap so that the teacher's head was pointed to the floor and her bottom was centered perfectly between Kachiko's legs. The time lost girl had her open hand raised high, as though she had been about to deliver a powerful spanking.  
  
The 'pervert' in question had her jaw come unhinged as she saw the Wanted poster in Akane's hand. Seeing all of the wide-eyes stares pointed in her direction, and suddenly grasping what the situation appeared to indicate all too well, Kachiko cried out, "This isn't what it looks like! I was just helping Miss Hinako fix a tear on the back of her dress!" Quickly, she grabbed Hinako and stood the girl on her feet, smoothing out the teacher's dress. "There, you see? Completely unmolested in any way shape or form. I would never do something like that to one of the great educators of our school system. Hehehehe."  
  
Hinako held her hand out. "Coin," she commanded.   
  
Kachiko winced as she reluctantly handed over a fifty yen piece.  
  
"Happo-gojuuen Setsu!"  
  
xxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Thank god the day is finally over," Kachiko moaned. Her shoulders were slumped forward so far that her knuckles were practically dragging on the ground.   
  
"You did most of it to yourself," Akane informed her. "If you'd just left well enough alone, none of those bad things would have happened to you."  
  
"Young girls shouldn't give their mother's speeches," Kachiko said tiredly.  
  
Ranma said, "Now about that rematch."  
  
Kachiko shot him a nasty look. "Ranma, you do understand that at this point killing you would only brighten my day."  
  
Ranma decided to let the matter drop for an hour or two.  
  
A deep, baritone voice that sounded as though it held the power of a force of nature, like a hurricane, behind it bellowed out, "Kachiko Tendou!"  
  
The trio looked up to see a huge, cloaked stranger standing directly in front of them.  
  
"I'm Kachiko Tendou," she said.  
  
The man's head jerked under the hood. Slowly he pulled it back revealing a man in his late thirties with a handsome, if weary, face. He brushed back his cloak, revealing underneath an open black leather vest and a chest that appeared as though it had been carved from chiseled rock. More noticeable than the excellent physique was the set of seven round scars on his torso. They started at his navel and led up to the middle of his breastbone.  
  
Akane placed a hand on her mother's arm. "I don't like the looks of this guy."  
  
The air seemed to fill with an electricity. Tensions rose as the man's gaze seemed to try to burn holes in the much smaller girl.  
  
Ranma began to position himself between Kachiko and the stranger. "You'd better let me handle-"  
  
Kachiko placed a hand on his chest to prevent him from continuing to move in front of her. There was an iron in her voice he had not heard before as she stated in cold, hard tones, "No. He's come for me. I'll deal with this." Before Ranma could protest, she took a step towards the man.  
  
The hint of potential violence that hung in the air increased as the distance between the two lessened. The man's eyes glowed twice as bright, and his face became a sneer as Kachiko continued walking until she stood directly in front of him. She balled her fists, and her feet shifted. Ranma noted she could move to the right or left quickly should the need arise.  
  
"You wanted me?" she asked.  
  
The man looked down at the smaller girl. He flexed hands that were large enough to engulf her head and crumple it the way a person might crumple a piece of paper. "Yes. I've come a long way to meet you. I've traveled decades and untold thousands of miles to see you here on this day. And now, it's time!" His hands were a blur as they went under his cloak.  
  
"Ranma!" Akane shouted.  
  
Ranma was already in motion, though he knew he would not arrive in time given how impossibly fast the large man's hands moved. He shouted, "Kachi!"  
  
Ranma found his assessment was correct. He had covered less than half the distance as the man's hands emerged from the confines of his cloak and he thrust an object towards Kachiko. He said in cold, hard tones, "Sign here."  
  
Ranma made a deft facefault at Kachiko's feet as she casually signed her name to the clipboard.  
  
Kachiko looked down at him. "No need to get bent out of shape. I'll let you look at the package," she assured him.  
  
Ranma shot to his feet. "What the hell was all that tension about if this just a delivery guy?!"  
  
Kachiko shrugged. "I didn't notice any tension." She turned to the delivery person. "How about you?"  
  
"I think he's just paranoid," the man said as he handed Kachiko a large cardboard package that had also been hidden in the folds of the cloak.  
  
"What was up with the dirty look you shot her?" Ranma said.  
  
The man scratched his head. "Dirty look? I didn't give her a dirty look. I've never even met her before today, so why would I shoot her a dirty look? That was my 'I'm really uncomfortable' look."  
  
"You're uncomfortable?" Ranma asked.  
  
"Bowel trouble. I-"  
  
"No more!" Ranma exclaimed as he covered his ears.  
  
"Those are some nasty scars." Akane said, pointing at the seven hideous gouges in the man's torso. "What made them?"  
  
The man fingered the marks. "Oh, these? They're from a case of chicken pox I had when I was a kid."  
  
Kachiko laughed, "I'd hate to see the chicken that made those."   
  
Everyone looked at her in irritation for having their hearing assaulted in such a manner.  
  
Seeking to change the subject, Kachiko held up the package. "Why don't we just find out who sent this?" Kachiko read the return address. "It's got Wacky Wakaba's name on it, and it's postmarked from over twenty years ago!"   
  
The man proudly stated, "Whether it's storms, natural disasters, wars, or being hurled into far off lands filled with murderous and insanely powerful fighters that can make people explode with a touch, it doesn't matter because Federal Express always delivers."  
  
Kachiko quickly tore the tape around the cardboard off. Everyone peered over her shoulder as she opened the top. She tossed aside the packing foam and looked inside. Taking up most of the package was an odd mechanical device, circular in nature, and about the width and height of a cooking pot. On the very top of the item there was black charring that was centered on a button. Sitting on top of the device was a card addressed to Kachi.  
  
She opened it up and read it aloud. "'For your birthday I decided to give you your very own dimensional oscillation bomb. I hope you enjoy your unplanned trip to another dimension! WAHAHAHAHA!' and it's signed Wakaba." She clutched the letter to her chest. That's so sweet. She remembered by birthday. Let's give it a whirl." Kachiko pushed the button.  
  
Nothing happened.  
  
Kachiko examined the black charring more closely. "Hey! This thing's broken!"  
  
The light of realization came to the man's eyes. "So that explains it! I really was in some other dimensional post apocalyptic world. All this time I thought I made a wrong turn and ended up in New Jersey." The man shrugged the unplanned trip off. "Time to go back to headquarters. I got a heck of a lot of backpay to pick up." He departed the school grounds using the same methodical pace he had used for the last twenty years.  
  
Kachiko placed the device back in the box. "I suppose it doesn't matter if it's broken. It's the thought that counts." She looked to the skies. "Thank you Wakaba, wherever you may be."  
  
Akane's eyebrow twitched violently. "You do understand that the only reason you weren't the one hurled into the dimension that guy went to was because the bomb accidentally went off while he was carrying it? That his little trip was, in fact, meant for you?"  
  
Kachiko looked at Akane as though she was stupid. "Of course it was for me. It's just the sort of thing Wakaba would do for me for my birthday. She knew how much I liked to travel. She was a really good, thoughtful, caring friend." Kachiko sighed in remembrance of the friendship of the past.  
  
Surrendering in the face of such obliviousness, Akane shook her head and said, "It's way past time to head home. Let's go."   
  
Kachiko agreed, but took one last look at the school and shouted, "But just you wait until tomorrow, you dwarf! If you think today was bad, I'll show you a thing or two about-"  
  
Akane and Ranma grabbed Kachiko by the arms and dragged her off towards home, epithets about size changing teachers following in their wake.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Yuka and Sayuri were deep in conversation as they headed out past the front gates of Furinkan. Lately, things had been hectic enough in Akane's life that they left her to her own devices when it came to walking home.  
  
Yuka said to her companion. "So let me get this straight. Ranma was caught giving erotic lesbian action to Miss Hinako, Ukyou has been officially accused by The CLAP of being a pervert, Akane tried to molest Sora in the showers, Anno is trying his hand at a high school romance series, and Kachi is a narcissist?"  
  
"Yeah. I bet Anno does an episode all in stills and tries saying he's being 'artistic' instead of just plain lazy."  
  
Yuka nodded in agreement. "Still, that thing about Kachi surprises me."  
  
"Me too," Sayuri agreed. "I didn't have her pegged as a smoker."  
  
"So pretty much of the same old same, huh?"  
  
"Pretty much. You ever think anything different is going to happen around here?"  
  
"Not in my lifetime," Yuka admitted.  
  
Thoroughly bored, the two headed home.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Since others have mentioned it, no, I didn't see Back to the Future II. The time lost person delivery joke is a case of similar lines of thought, not plaigerism.  
  
Special Thanks to  
Chris Horton  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
Michael A. Chase  
The Apprentice 


	8. The Things We Wish For Chapter 8

The Things We Wish For...  
Chapter 7  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
[Writer's note: I ordinarily don't like to do this, but I don't believe this chapter is quite as good as the one before, but it accomplishes what I want and need to do. Hopefully you'll enjoy it anyway.]  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present, there's only the slight complication that she was plucked out of time at the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi Tendou was delighted with herself. For a long while --since Kachiko first appeared, to be accurate-- Kasumi had been confused as to why her mother behaved in such a non-motherly manner. There were habits and traits that clearly indicated this was indeed the mother Kasumi knew and loved, but those were few and far between. Instead, she acted far too much like most of Ranma's friends, who were nice but decidedly non-motherly as well. It made no sense that she would have changed so much, and definitely not for the better.  
  
After much concern and worry, Kasumi came to understand what the problem with her mother was: Kachiko hadn't become the woman she eventually would. It had been obvious the whole time, but she hadn't realized it. It wasn't that hard to believe she had overlooked it. Kasumi was quite honest with herself in admitting she didn't like trying to solve complex problems and avoided them. One of her friends back in high school had put it succinctly: Kasumi was a maintainer, not a groundbreaker. She followed, but never led. And Kasumi was happy being that way. Simple things in life were all she cared for. But there were times when she was confronted with problems that required her personal attention, like when Nabiki had insisted on becoming Ranma's fiancee. Things were getting out of control, so Kasumi had to solve that problem by telling Nabiki to stop it. Now things were out of control again, and it fell to Kasumi to fix them.  
  
Her first idea had been for Auntie Nodoka to help train Kachiko in what it took to be a mother. The idea had seemed wonderful at first and should have solved everything. However, little progress was coming that way. For some strange reason, it seemed Auntie didn't want to train Kachiko, and the feeling was mutual on the time-lost girl's part. Solutions did not lie in that direction after all.  
  
That meant it fell to Kasumi to help spur matters along. After much thought and concern, the answer finally came to her. It was simple, really. While Nodoka encouraged the more domestic skills, Kasumi would engineer things so that Kachiko's dormant motherly instincts would come to the fore. And what better way to do that than to give her a small child to take care of? All women, when confronted with a young baby, felt an inherent urge to care for the children. Once Kachiko was placed in such a situation, her own hardline against children at in early age would fall by the wayside. And once she accepted Kasumi, Nabiki, and Akane as her daughters, she would want to have a family, marry Soun (again) and help take care of the house, just as she was meant to do, since she already had. It was perfect.  
  
Of course, there was the matter of procuring a child. Obviously Kasumi producing one of her own was out of the question; it wasn't exactly the same things as making dinner for the family. That meant borrowing someone else's. The main problem there was that no one wanted to leave their children at the Tendou house. As Kasumi discovered in times past when she offered to baby sit, for some peculiar reason the neighbors thought the environment was too hectic and dangerous for children. That was silly. Kasumi and her sisters had been raised there, and they had turned out fine. And it was good for children to be in an active environment rather than a staid and boring one. But none of the neighbors agreed with that philosophy, and had refused to allow their children near the Tendou domicile.  
  
But then Kasumi remembered the new neighbors at the end of the street, neighbors that had a little boy that was a little over one or so. They had moved in a month ago. The few times Kasumi had gone to greet the Yasurokas, they had refused to answer the door. Kasumi had caught rumors (which she assured herself were exaggerations) that the people were shut-ins that never went out to the point they had their food delivered to their home. Others claimed there was something mysterious about their child. Small animals and household pets had been disappearing shortly after the family moved in, and wagging tongues said the family was to blame. Unusual cries could be heard every night from the house, and sometimes it smelled of blood. And at odd hours of the night, voices could be heard chanting things. The general consensus was that it was best the Yasurokas were left alone, since it was obvious they wanted nothing to do with the rest of the neighborhood.  
  
But Kasumi was eager to have a child for her mother to look after, and they seemed the last reasonable hope. Otherwise she would have to rent one from an orphanage or something.  
  
After making proper arrangements with the rest of the family, Kasumi put on her best dress and baked some cookies as a sort of neighborly greeting (not a bribe, she assured herself) to get her in the door. Once inside, she would make the offer. Odds were the parents didn't get out much because of their child, and they would be delighted to have someone baby-sit the little tot for a night. It was a perfect plan. Not only would it help awaken her mother's parental instincts, but it would be a neighborly gesture as well.  
  
Her plans complete, Kasumi walked to the end of the street, humming a merry little tune to herself the entire way. As she approached the house, she noticed a flock of crows stood perched on the roof, their obsidian orbs focused on Kasumi, as though daring her to approach the property.   
  
"Hello, little birdies," Kasumi greeted, unconcerned about their baleful gaze. Perhaps they were having problems finding food. She would set up a bird feeder to feed the poor starving birdies at a later time.  
  
The fence surrounding the house had been added since the family moved in. It was composed of thick wrought-iron metal and had wicked-looking spikes lining the entire length along the top. Numerous 'No Trespassing' signs were taped to the bars, as plentiful as wanted posters in a police station. Of course, Kasumi paid them no heed. She wasn't trespassing; she was being neighborly.  
  
Just as she was about to knock on the closed gate, it opened of its own accord, screeching on hinges that pleaded for an entire can of oil to ease their suffering. Taking that as an invitation, Kasumi walked up to the front door. As she did so, she noted that the ground was bone dry and all the sparse grass that remained was desiccated, brown husks. She would have to recommend a good landscaper for them.   
  
She approached the door, a huge metal thing that appeared to be a dozen centimeters thick, judging by how solid it appeared on the outside. Obviously these were people that were concerned about break-ins. Kasumi would have to assure them that besides Grandfather Happosai's panty stealing, no crimes occurred on their street. For some reason criminals seemed to avoid it. So did the police, for that matter. But since there was no crime, there was no need for police. It all balanced out.  
  
Kasumi put on her neighborly smile and rang the doorbell, hoping the family was in. After a full minute, a shutter toward the top slid back. A pair of panic filled eyes looked through the metal slit. "Who are you what do you want?!" the voice almost screeched as the words tumbled out.  
  
Kasumi held up the basket with her goods. "I'm your neighbor, Kasumi Tendou. I've brought you some cookies and wanted to welcome you to the neighborhood."  
  
"We don't want any!" the man (whom Kasumi assumed to be Mr. Yasuroka) stated in no uncertain terms.   
  
"Is that the delivery man with the food?" a woman's voice asked from somewhere deeper in the house.   
  
"It's a neighbor."   
  
"Send her away!" the woman's voice was now filled with as much dread as the man's.  
  
Kasumi smiled again. Usually when people first said no, they withered under her pleasant demeanor and gave in. "I'm sure you'd like some. They are quite good. I've also come to help you."  
  
"Help?" the man said, sounding like a drowning person that had just been offered a life preserver.   
  
"Yes. It's my understanding you have a child. I'm sure you'd like to go out, and I'd be more than happy to baby-sit for you."  
  
The man's eyes widened so much Kasumi feared they would fall out of their sockets. Softly, almost inaudibly, the man gasped, "He's summoned you here, hasn't he?"  
  
Kasumi stared at him in confusion. "I beg your pardon?"  
  
"Get away while you can," the man whispered.   
  
From within the house, a much deeper voice said, "Nonsense. Don't be rude. By all means, you should go out for an evening and allow the girl to baby-sit."   
  
The voice was unlike any Kasumi had ever heard before. It was like a vocal form of bile to hear words intoned in such a manner. Nails drawn across a chalkboard would sound like birds singing compared to that voice.   
  
"It sounds like someone has a sore throat," Kasumi said, smiling. "I have some home remedies for that I could recommend."  
  
The sound of heavy metal bars being lifted and a half dozen bolts snapping back into place came to Kasumi's ears. The door opened, creaking almost as ominously as the gate had. Kasumi could see the Mr. Yasuroka was trembling. Pale and wan, he looked like a prisoner that hadn't eaten more than stale bread and water or seen the light of day in years. Kasumi offered him the basket of cookies.  
  
He accepted it and placed it on a stand near the door. From within the house a sad faced woman came to the entryway and looked Kasumi over. She had an equally wane appearance. "I am Umi Yasuroka... I," for a moment she looked as though she were about to blurt out something, then thought better of it. "It is an honor to meet you. Tetsuo is this way."  
  
Kasumi noted the woman's voice sounded better now, and followed the couple into a what was once a living room, but now appeared to be something out of a gothic temple. Braziers full of lit candles lined the room. Repulsive sculptures of demonic half man, half animal creatures stood at every corner. There was a huge, elaborate inverted pentagram on the floor, decorated in a dried red substance, and a black altar made of mirrored black stone dominated in the center of the room.   
  
On top of the altar in stark contrast to the darkness that resided in every corner of the room, sat a child no more than a year and half old. He had a pudgy face and black hair, with a single strand sitting up near the top. He wore blue overalls and a white shirt underneath. He gave Kasumi a bright, cheery smile upon seeing her and clapped his hands.  
  
"I see you're very religious," Kasumi said to the couple.  
  
The two looked at each other in open surprise at her reaction. Weakly, Umi said, "Yes, I guess you can say that. The beas... Tetsuo seems to like this room best. Are you certain you want to baby-sit him? Perhaps it would be best if you-"  
  
A low rumbling growl, like a displeased lion the size of a jet engine, filled the room. A warm, humid wind filled the house for just a moment, blowing everyone's hair around.  
  
"I meant to say we're honored you'd watch him!" Umi quickly amended. The husband cowered behind his wife and nodded in assent.  
  
The growling died off and the air settled.  
  
"Thank you very much," Kasumi said, bowing before the couple. Obviously they needed to get out in the worst way. It was nice they were so protective of their child, but it would do little Tetsuo good to get out of the stuffy confines of the house and meet new people.   
  
She picked up Tetsuo and smiled at him. "I'm Kasumi Tendou and will be watching you today. Won't that be fun?"  
  
The child nodded his head and smiled a large, almost inhuman, toothy grin.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi returned to her home, Tetsuo in tow. From all appearances, the boy was wonderfully normal for a one and a half year old. He appeared healthy, being able to keep his little legs pumping and stay alongside Kasumi as they walked to her house. Once they got to the gate, she could no longer resist and picked up the child. She held him up so he was face level with her and could not help making childlike noises and saying, "You're so cute." She wanted children like this someday. Maybe in a few years she would get the chance to meet someone nice and settle down.  
  
The child gave his wide smile back at Kasumi, his eyes glinting with an intelligence that belied his age.  
  
"I'm home," Kasumi announced, though she was fully aware there were only two others left in the house at this time, and Nabiki would be leaving soon.  
  
Then she remembered something. "Oh dear, I forgot about the food." Kasumi entered the kitchen and placed the child on the counter. "Stay here for a moment, I have to get something out of the oven."  
  
Tetsuo nodded his head. Kasumi grabbed a pair of oven mittens and bent over to remove the casserole she had been making. A foreign dish, but one that her mother had mentioned she wanted to try. Kasumi had been eager to please her parent. It would also save Kachiko the trouble of cooking for her and Tetsuo later.   
  
As Kasumi bent down, Tetsuo's delighted smile changed into a sinister gleam. He turned to a nearby knife block where a number of handles stuck out. He stood up quietly, using an agility that should have been impossible for a year and half year old, and grabbed the largest knife from the block. Handling the blade with an ease associated with practice, he proceeded to walk silently across the counter and close the distance to his baby-sitter.  
  
Kasumi was finally starting to rise, attention riveted to the pan in her hand. Hands full, she closed the oven door with her foot and rose to her full height.   
  
Now at his height, her back to him, Tetsuo switched his grip on the knife and raised it overhead. He aimed for the center of the back, smiled insanely, and-  
  
"Hey, Kasumi, something smells pretty damn good... whose kid is that?"  
  
Kasumi turned to see Kachiko in the doorway. She quickly set the pan on a metal rack and turned to see Tetsuo had moved along the counter to get closer to her. She was amused that he liked her so much he wanted to stay by her side, but then she spotted the knife lying next to gurgling child.   
  
Horrified, Kasumi picked it up, careful to keep the point away from the child. "No, Tetsuo! Knives are very, very bad! You must never play with them." She was very emphatic in her admonishment.   
  
Tetsuo, wide eyed, nodded in affirmation.  
  
At that point Kachiko had wandered over to the counter and looked over the casserole with a critical eye. As she smiled in appreciation at the food, she said, "Let the brat cut himself a couple of times. He'll learn not to play with knives."  
  
Kasumi looked at her mother, aghast. "That's terrible. What sort of person would allow a child to cut themselves to... prove..." The outrage (or what qualified for such in Kasumi's eyes. Most people would merely have called it mild disapproval) quickly passed as she remembered...  
  
xxxxxxxx  
  
"Ah, Momma! I cut myself!"  
  
Kachiko looked down at her daughter. She saw the finger Kasumi was holding, a bit of blood on the tip, and gave sad shake of the head. "That's because you weren't careful. Knives are sharp, and if you don't pay attention, you'll get cut."  
  
"Make it stop hurting," Little Kasumi sobbed.  
  
In no great rush, Kachiko slowly went to the cupboard where she kept the disinfectant. "It doesn't work that way. If you cut yourself, it'll hurt. It's to remind you to be more careful next time. Are you going to be more careful next time?"  
  
"Yes, Momma," Little Kasumi sniffled.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Oh," Kasumi said as she absently rubbed the finger that had been cut so long ago. It was odd how she didn't remember her mother being quite so direct in her teaching methods. She seemed much more... angelic, at least before.  
  
"Experience is always the best teacher," Kachiko informed her as she stuck a finger in the casserole, then pulled it back yelling, "Hot, hot!" She began sucking on the burnt digit. "What's the kid doing here anyway?" she asked through a mouthful of finger.  
  
Kasumi turned from her memories of a young Nabiki, and later Akane, cutting themselves and her mother giving them the exact same lecture. "Oh, that's Tetsuo. I'm baby-sitting him." Kasumi felt increasingly bad about misleading her mother this way, but it was for the best for everyone, including Kachiko.   
  
A knowing light came to Kachiko's eyes. "That would explain the toys Soun pulled down from the attic. I thought he was just housecleaning." Kachiko looked longingly at the casserole. "Where's Ranma? I haven't seen him all day."  
  
Kasumi said, "I believe he and Akane went to a study session with some of their classmates. They won't be back for a while. Father and the Saotomes went out as well."  
  
"And I'm heading out too," Nabiki informed the others as she entered the kitchen and grabbed a carrot from the refrigerator. She looked at Tetsuo. "Cute kid," she then shot a wicked smile to Kachiko before heading out of the kitchen and toward the front door.  
  
Kachiko looked suspiciously at the exit. "I wonder what she's so happy about."   
  
"She's that way sometimes," Kasumi told her.  
  
Kachiko scratched her chin in thought. "Yes, but it usually means someone else suffers for it. She's like a parasite: taking from others and not giving anything in return. Oh well." Leaving the matter at rest, Kachiko looked at Tetsuo and frowned. "Rugrat's going to be a problem. I can tell just by looking at him."  
  
Tetsuo smiled at Kachiko, but it appeared strained.  
  
"Children are wonderful," Kasumi gushed, trying to get her mother in the right mindset for what was to come.  
  
"Assuming they aren't mine and someone else takes care of them, yeah," Kachiko said. "I wonder what Tachi-kun's doing. Maybe he'd like to take me out on a date. I ought to give him a call."   
  
"No!" Kasumi shouted.  
  
Kachiko was startled by the unexpected outburst. "I was only considering it. You don't have to jump down my throat."  
  
Thinking fast, Kasumi said, "I was hoping we might get a chance to spend some time together."  
  
"You mean you want me to help take care of the kid," Kachiko said dryly.  
  
"Ah." Kasumi became concerned that Kachiko had somehow sensed her true intentions. Before she could make up an excuse, the phone rang. Kasumi was quick to pick it up before Kachiko could. "Hello?"  
  
"I'm calling like you asked," Nabiki said on the other end of the line.  
  
"I see," Kasumi began reciting the lines she had come up with. "So you are stuck in Roppongi and need me to help you? You are unable to reach your parents or husband? I am your only hope? Well of course, Misao Akiyama. I will be right down." Kasumi hung of the phone. She turned to Kachiko, "Mother, I have to ask you a big favor."  
  
"Already got the little brat bundled up for your trip," Kachiko said as she held Tetsuo out for Kasumi.  
  
Kasumi waved her hands helplessly. "I don't think taking a child to that district is a good idea. It might have a bad influence on him." She went to the living room to get her purse.  
  
Following close behind, child still held out in offering, Kachiko said, "Going through Roppongi is not going to turn a one and half year old into a hooker." Kachiko thrust the child towards her again.  
  
Kasumi accepted the child, then placed him on the floor among the rocking horse and building blocks with letters that her father had left out for the child to play with. Kasumi decided it was time to put her foot down. "Mother, you are being unreasonable and you know it. It would not be proper to take the child with me to a seedy area of town I am unfamiliar with. You are the only one here and are quite capable of taking care of Tetsuo. I'll see to it you get all the baby sitting money."  
  
The mention of money made Kachiko reconsider. "Getting some cash would help keep that greedy wench from blaming me for her funds continuing to be misplaced." Largely in part because Kachiko would stop taking them, though it was suitable punishment for Nabiki to lose her ill-gotten gains. Part of being a responsible parent was teaching children that crime didn't pay, and from what Akane had said, all of Nabiki's money came from taking advantage of helpless people or tricking them. Except for some fellow named Kinnosuke, no one had tried to outdo her. Therefore Kachiko took it upon herself to demonstrate to Nabiki the error of her ways through object lessons rather than lectures which Kachiko knew would fall upon deaf ears. If she came out monetarily ahead in the process, that just meant she would be rewarded for her proper parenting method.  
  
While Kachiko congratulated herself on being such a responsible parent for such an irresponsible girl, she discovered Kasumi had used the time wisely by moving to the front door and putting on her shoes. "Hey, I haven't agreed to this yet," Kachiko reminded her.  
  
Kasumi looked hopefully at Kachiko.  
  
"Damn whipped puppy dog look," Kachiko grumbled. More loudly, she said, "Fine, I'll look after the brat. But you get back here as soon as you can."   
  
"Good bye, Mother. Thank you for helping me out." Kasumi was about to bow, but on impulse, hugged the girl. It was interesting to note that she was now taller than Kachiko and put an odd twist on the display of affection.  
  
Kachiko was obviously uncomfortable with the gesture, but returned it anyway. As Kasumi headed out the door and up the walk, Kachiko called after her, "I'll have you know, whatever happens while you're gone is not my responsibility! You're the one leaving the brat with me!"  
  
Kasumi just waved and headed up the road towards the nearest railway station.  
  
xxxxxxxxx  
  
Cursing under her breath, Kachiko reentered the house. It wasn't fair that she had some mewling brat foisted upon her. She was young, and meant to have fun. She should have been out on a date making out with some handsome guy, not changing the diapers on some diminutive crying and crapping machine. If she hadn't known better, she would have sworn Kasumi had set her up to take care of the child or something. But that was silly. The girl was too nice. Kachiko would be able to see through any scheme someone that pleasant came up with. Akane wasn't much better, and Ranma could be read like an open book. Nabiki was the only one devious enough for such maneuvering, and Kachiko was certain she would have sniffed that out. It was just coincidence that the child ended up in her sole care, that was all.   
  
Kachiko reentered the living room to check on her ward. She saw that Tetsuo was actually acting the part of mild mannered child, and was playing with the blocks. Good, it was nice to know the kid could entertain himself. It would make Kachiko's job easier.   
  
Tetsuo backed away from the blocks and stood proudly, displaying his work for Kachiko's benefit. Kachiko shrugged and looked at what he had made. The child had used the letters on the sides to spell out a sentence.  
  
"You will be dead by dawn."  
  
The child grinned evilly in her direction.  
  
Kachiko nodded in approval. "You must be one of those prodigy type kids. Pretty bright. Here." She bent down, rearranged the letters, and used some additional blocks to spell out something as well. She stood back and allowed Tetsuo to admire her handiwork.   
  
"I really don't like kids."  
  
"Think about it," Kachiko told him as she went to the kitchen to help herself to the casserole. She piled on a heaping plate of it, and made a smaller one for Tetsuo. If the kid didn't like it, he could go hungry. It was her experience that children's pickiness when it came to food went down in direct proportion to how increasingly hungry they were.  
  
As Kachiko entered the living room, plates in hand, she saw that Tetsuo had been busy. All around on the walls, written in a red substance was the word "redrum." On the floor, the blocks had been reshaped to form a ziggurat displaying the word, 'DEATH' over every surface. As to Tetsuo himself, he floated above the ziggurat, his eyes now vertical slits on fields of gold. His mouth was full of needle sharp fangs, and two tiny horns sprouted from his head. His wore a rictus leer, one full of malice and hate that was promised to the only other person in the home.  
  
Kachiko just shook her head resignedly. "I see someone has hit their terrible twos a bit early, and I get stuck watching them. Great. Just !#$% great." She made as though to sit down and eat.  
  
A voice boomed throughout the room, seeming to come from the air rather than the child's mouth. The words were felt more than heard, the evil in them palpable to the point that most people would run in terror or wet themselves. Even the plants in the room wilted at the reverberations. "Foolish cow, you will meet your doom this evening! Your agony shall drive you insane, and your soul will be tortured throughout eternity! Your suffering will be legendary, even in the deepest pits of Hell!"  
  
Kachiko growled, "I see. So you are in league with them. I'll tell you the exact same thing I told the rest of my so-called family: I am not marrying that old geezer. Not now. Not ever. So you can get that out of your head right now."  
  
"The only thing you shall be bound to is torment, misery, and hopelessness."  
  
"And I told you I am not marrying Soun!"  
  
The child blinked at her in surprise. "You stupid mortal! I am not describing marriage! I am a demon inhabiting this child's body that's going to kill you in the most painful way imaginable and then devour your soul for a millennium."  
  
Kachiko looked at him suspiciously. "You're a demon in that kid's body?"  
  
The floating creature looked at Kachiko in angry confusion. "Of course I am. Look at the blood on the wall, what I did with the blocks, my stated intentions, and the flying. It's obvious."  
  
"A demon. That's a relief," Kachiko relaxed. "You had me worried that you were trying to set me up with that old guy too. I feel a lot better now. The way almost everyone is fixated on me marrying him and treating the girls like my kids or something I jumped to the wrong conclusion. Sorry about that."  
  
The demonic child roared, the sound making the building shake to its foundation. "Quit apologizing and feeling relieved! You are doomed in a way your puny imagination could never comprehend!"  
  
Kachiko gave him a dismissive wave. "Ah, you're just a demon. That's nothing to get all bent out of shape about."  
  
"Yes it is!" Brimstone smoke began to emit from Tetsuo's body. "I am Shuma-Ghorath-Chan."  
  
"Shuma-Ghorath-Chan?" Kachiko asked. "That makes you sound cute, not evil."  
  
"Every damn person in Japan says that!" Shuma-Ghorath-Chan yelled. "It's not my fault it's an appellation denoting affection of cuteness in your language! In mine it's a sign of pure evil. It just doesn't translate well."  
  
"Since your name's too long, I'm calling you Shumy-Chan," Kachiko informed him. "So what's your gimmick?"  
  
The demon seemed taken aback. "Gimmick?"  
  
"Yeah, gimmick," Kachiko said. "All the demons I've met had one. Etrigan spoke in rhymes. Pandamonious had his panda fetish. Beezulbub the Cabbagehead Demon made a mean dish of cole slaw. So what's yours?"  
  
"I... I don't have one," the demon admitted in confusion.  
  
Kachiko scoffed. "And how do you expect me to take you seriously if you don't have a gimmick? Obviously you've put no thought whatsoever into this whole demon thing."  
  
"I'll devour your soul!" The demon screeched. "I'll break your bones and carve off your skin and shape it into-"  
  
"-Neat origami birds, and rape me with your tentacles, and torment me by calling in the middle of the night and hanging up, and blah blah blah." Kachiko rolled her eyes. "Hello. This is not new stuff. I hear it all the time from you and your stupid kind. Could you at least come up with something creative?"  
  
The demon's eyes flared, red temporarily overcoming the fields of gold. "I'll show you creative. Originally I was going to slowly torture you, then, when the girl that invited me here showed up, dispatch you before her eyes to show what a mistake she made before I consumed her as well. But you've made me angry, so I'll just kill you now and settle for torturing the rest of the family in your place."  
  
Kachiko crossed her arms in defiance. "And just how do you intend to do that?"  
  
"Like this!" Shumy-Chan gave a great intake of air, swelled up like a balloon, and exhaled, unleashing a torrent of fire. The cone of fire expanded with every centimeter it covered until it consumed a third of the room. Eventually the gout of flame stopped, and the demon looked through the charred ashes that were left behind where his flames touched the structure. "Hahahaha! How's that for creative, mortal cow?"  
  
A stick with a blackened marshmallow stuck on the end was thrust over his shoulder and held out in front of him. "Want one?"  
  
The demon drooled "Ah, there's nothing quite as scrumptious as a marshmallow with just the right amount of blackening." He took it off the stick and was about to pop it in his mouth when he turned completely around to see who had offered the morsel.   
  
Kachiko stood there idly chewing on a marshmallow of her own. "I like them a little lighter myself, but I was never into overcooked food."  
  
The demon floated back in stunned amazement. He pointed in the direction of the scorched remnants of the room, then at Kachiko. "How... how did you?"  
  
Kachiko tossed the stick aside. "Every one of you stupid demons always use fire. It's like you all took the same training seminar or something. Dodging direct fireblasts like that is easy. Larger ones are trickier, but you just have to switch techniques to deal with those." Kachiko fell into a fighting stance. "Now it's time to kick your butt, just like I did to all your buddies."  
  
Shumy-Chan laughed. "Silly girl, you dare not attack me."  
  
Kachiko paused slightly. "Why not?"  
  
Shumy-Chan floated closer, all but daring her to strike him as he unleashed a macabre smile. "Because you would harm this innocent child whose body I am possessing. His spirit still dwells within, but is too insignificant to fight me. I suppose you could call that my 'gimmick.' I possess the ultimate shield to protect me from harm. I can attack you at will, and all you can do is dodge until your muscles become weary and your bones threaten to brAHH!" Shumy-Chan barely flew out of the way of a fist aimed at his face.  
  
He shot Kachiko an evil glare. "I see. You are more stupid than I originally thought and did not understand me. I am possessing this *innocent* child. If you hit me, you will harm him even more-Hey!!" he barely evaded a second blow. "What are you, crazy? I'm dead serious about me only possessing the body. It really belongs to the child."  
  
Kachiko smirked in the demon's direction. "You're forgetting something I told you before."  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"I really don't like kids!" Kachiko shouted as she launched a flying kick at Shumy-Chan.  
  
Using all of his skills, he darted to the left barely dodging the blow. It was so close he felt the wind from the kick blow his hair back. The closeness of the blow made the demon begin to sweat. "You can't destroy this innocent child. Your soul will go straight to Hell if you do."  
  
"As I recall, you were going to devour it anyway. Given a choice, I'll take you down with me in the process of eternal damnation."  
  
"Damn you!" Shumy-Chan flew away from her. Luckily, there were other forms of attack he had besides the fire. He headed to the rocking horse and landed on it.  
  
Kachiko fell out of her attack stance and laughed. "I somehow don't think you're going to get away on that."  
  
"Escape is not my intention." The demon's smile returned as he gripped the rocking horse by its neck. Eldritch energies coursed through his palms and flowed into the wood, permeating its entire being. The horse grew in stature, becoming wider and larger. Wood warped as a musculature became evident across the entire breadth of the toy until it was the size of a real horse. Its painted eyes turned crimson and it opened its mouth, showing jagged nails in the place of its teeth. Nostrils flared, releasing a breath that carried the fetid scent of rotting wood. It flexed its powerful legs, shattering the runners on the bottom and freeing the nightmare steed from its only restraints. A howl came from the deepest recesses of its throat, shattering every piece of glass in the room. It then turned sanguine eyes towards its enemy: Kachiko.  
  
Shumy-Chan bellowed, "Run the bitch down!" and struck the horse with his hand to spur it forward.  
  
The horse rose up on its hind legs, elevating them up high enough to shatter part of the ceiling. It brought them back down, the charged towards Kachiko with a speed that would have made any jockey pass out in amazement.  
  
Shumy-Chan laughed evilly as he watched the surprised Kachiko stand motionless. She disappeared from sight as the nightmare's thick neck blocked his view and it ran on top of her. Shumy-Chan felt the steed tremble for just a moment, then continue galloping. It hit the wall, going clean through it as though it had been made of paper. It continued forcing its way through another wall before ending up in the open air of the yard.   
  
The demon let his mount tear up huge tracks of the lawn with its cloven hooves, laughing insanely the entire time. To the skies he shouted, "Foolish mortal, how did you like that ride of your life?"  
  
"I was never much into horses. If I'm going to ride bareback, I'd want to do it with a different species, if you get my meaning," a voice behind him quipped.   
  
Shumy-Chan's jaw nearly became unhinged. He pivoted his head around and screamed, "How?!"  
  
Kachiko shrugged. "All I had to do was watch out for his legs and grab onto his neck, then move along underneath him until I was able to flip up here." She looked around. "Yep, definitely boring. Time to bring this ride to a halt."   
  
A splintering sound emanated from the area of the horse directly beneath Kachiko's legs. Shumy-Chan looked down to see cracks form in his wooden steed, starting directly beneath her thighs. They grew in size, looking like giant spider webs, until they traveled the length of the creature. There was a bellow of pain from the horse, than it stopped moving. In disbelief Shumy-Chan watched as, by leg power alone, Kachiko shattered his demonically imbued steed in half.   
  
No longer having a purchase, Shumy-Chan floated in the sky while Kachiko landed on the ground.   
  
She slapped her thighs. "I can crack coconuts with these babies. Did that once in front of the student body. Had a hard time getting a date for a while after that, for some odd reason," she added.  
  
The demon was concerned for a moment, but then his diabolic senses informed him of a great evil located nearby. Using his unholy powers, Shumy-Chan sent tendrils of ebon energy from his eyes to seek out the power. The dark tentacles reached down into the soil under the back porch. From the ground came a rumbling sound, and a laugh evil enough to rival that of Shumy-Chan filled the air. The back porch detonated in an explosion of wood and earth, temporarily concealing everything view. Mere seconds after the explosion someone emerged from the cloud of dust. It was a man obviously of Eastern European decent. He was tall, gaunt, and pale in complexion save for blood red lips and eyes. However, his most outstanding features were the fangs in his mouth, evident as he breathed in the crisp spring air. The clothing he wore was a tuxedo -an Armani- if Shumy-Chan wasn't mistaken, so impeccable he would have sworn it had been freshly pressed, save for one mark: a hole in the jacket right where his heart would be.  
  
The well-dressed vampire raised his fists to the sky and shouted in a heavy accent, "Free at last! Once again the night is mine to command. I vow that never again shall I, Baron Vladimir Tepeski, also known as Vlad the Skewerer, be denied my rightful place as absolute ruler of the undead. Let all who dare walk under nocturnal skies pay homage to its master! BWHAHAHA!"   
  
He waved his hand in the air. From the clouds overhead, lightning crashed down, striking him in the head.   
  
"Ow! I'm rusty from my earthen nap," Vlad explained as he rubbed his smoldering head.  
  
Shumy-Chan said, "I have freed you from your tomb, Vampire. In return I demand you kill this annoyance for me."  
  
Vlad bowed. "In return for your assistance, I shall grant you this boon. Besides, I'm hungry anyway. Now whom do you want me to dispatch?"  
  
"Her!" Shumy-Chan pointed at Kachiko.  
  
The vampire took one step forward, fangs bared and made a hissing noise intended to strike fear into the heart of his future meal. Then he squinted at the girl. He pulled a pair of glasses from an interior pocket, placed them on his face, then instantly stopped hissing. Instead he pointed in terror and shouted, "Ah! Tendou!"  
  
Kachiko smiled pleasantly and waved. "How's it going, Vlad-kun? Earthworms gnaw anything important off you?" She patted her crotch meaningfully.  
  
The vampire looked at the floating demon, looked again at Kachiko, then back at the ground. He sighed helplessly, put his glasses back in his pocket, picked up a piece of the shattered porch, and drove it into his heart.   
  
"What are you doing?!" Shumy-Chan shouted.  
  
The vampire hunched over in obvious agony. "Believe me... it's far less... painful and quicker... this way. You'll... find out... soon... enough." The vampire collapsed to the deck, using the last of his energy to roll back into the hole he had risen from.  
  
Shumy-Chan stared in stunned silence first at the hole, then in Kachiko's direction.   
  
Kachiko looked at the hole and pouted. "Jerk. He sure knows how to make a girl feel unwanted, you know?"  
  
"You aren't wanted!" Shumy-Chan assured her as he made his fingernails grow until they were razor sharp and as long as daggers. "I'll disembowel you, spreading your entrails out for the crows to feast upon!" he swore.  
  
This time Kachiko ran away. Delighted at finally gaining the upper hand and finding an attack she was afraid of, Shumy-Chan merrily flew after her. However, Kachiko's retreat didn't last long as she stopped and bent over, reaching to the grass.   
  
"I have you now!" Shumy-Chan flew in low, aiming for her posterior. Not the biggest of targets, but he could make do with it.  
  
A moment before the demon's fingernails would have impaled Kachiko, she spun around and moved faster than the demon's eyes could follow. He was still flying forward as he rammed straight into Kachiko's crotch, fingers still extended. For some odd reason, there was no blood flowing from the wounds he should have inflicted.   
  
Kachiko shouted, "Hey, you little perv! You're a couple of decades too young for that!" With one hand she grabbed him by the back of the neck and tossed him away.  
  
Shumy-Chan regained his balance in mid-flight and hovered there once again. He looked down at his hands. All that were left were tiny stubs where his nails had been.  
  
Kachiko wielded her hedge clippers like a giant sword. "And I always thought being taught Yardwork style martial arts was a complete waste of time. Looks like the old man really did know best. Now prepare to die!"   
  
She snipped at the air above the demon's head, forcing Shumy-Chan down. A second and third snip, and the demon found himself compelled to go down to ground level. He tried to retreat along the ground, but found his back to a wall. Moves to the right and left would easily be countered by the far quicker girl.   
  
The demon wailed to the skies, "Curse you! I have no choice but to leave this body. But mark my vow, Kachiko Tendou. I swear you have not heard the last of me." His words began grow faint as though the speaker was far away. "I will find a way to get revenge." The last word was barely audible.   
  
Kachiko stared down at the child. The look of intelligence that had been behind those eyes was gone. On the contrary, it seemed all that was there was a vast vacuum, save for basic instincts, like eating, crying, and sleeping. The child's smile lacked any malice of any sort. He just stood there, drooling.   
  
Kachiko breathed an exceptionally over dramatic sigh of relief. "I'm glad that's over with. Baby sitting is a lot harder now than it was in my day. That idiot daughter of mine is really going to get it for leaving me to hold the bag." She smacked a fist into an open palm, then began heading to the house.  
  
The little child remained where he was. He gurgled once, beamed at an insect that was down around his feet, flitting from a blade of grass to another, and ducked so low he ended up on his stomach, barely in time to evade the shears that snapped shut where his neck had been. "Are you insane?! You nearly decapitated me!"  
  
"Like I would fall for that pathetic 'Watch me pretend to leave the person I'm possessing' trick!" Kachiko retorted. "Now hold still, and I'll make it quick and painless. Or at least as painless as getting your head chopped off will be."  
  
Shumy-Chan panicked. The girl was stupid, but obviously had finely honed survival instincts, as well a streak of ruthlessness. Had they not been directed against him, he would have found the traits admirable. However, she was the enemy, and he would lose his hold on the mortal world for five hundred years, as well as having grievous harm inflicted on him, if his host died an unnatural death. Decapitation qualified as such. That meant going all out with his ultimate attack. It was one hundred percent certain to work, but employing it would leave him completely powerless for the next two days. And being powerless meant being vulnerable. He wouldn't even be able to light up a cigarette with his flame breath. It was a risk, but as Kachiko drew back the shears again, it was one this homicidal woman was forcing him to take.   
  
"Soul Kiss!" Shumy-Chan cried out. From his mouth he unleashed a large, shimmering black, billowing cloud. Rather than merely hover in the air, the cloud moved as though it was alive, heading straight for Kachiko. Before she could move it engulfed her entirely. For a moment it simply covered her in a misty cloak. Then it moved, entering her body through the very pores of her skin. It continued forcing its way in until it had entirely disappeared.  
  
As the cloud entered Kachiko, she froze up, unable to even breathe. A trembling wracked her body, like she had been plunged into a pool of water in the dead of winter. Her face began taking on a light green hue before she raised her head to the heavens and spewed out the shimmering black cloud. Unlike when Shumy-Chan expelled it, the cloud dissipated into the air.   
  
Kachiko looked as though she was about to throw up. "Kami-sama. What was that thing? It felt like I had motor oil pouring through my veins instead of blood."  
  
All Shumy-Chan could do was stare in mute horror. He pointed with one of his diminutive hands, trembling in uncomprehending fear; a state nearly impossible for a demon to feel. "It's not possible! Your soul should have been ripped from your body and not returned for a week! What are you?!"  
  
Somewhat recovered from the attack, Kachiko said ominously, "I am very displeased." And snapped the shears open and closed once.   
  
"NOOOO!" Shumy-Chan wailed at the sky as tears flowed down his face. From above his head, a bright red energy emerged, hovering in a small cloud shot through with twinkling motes of white. Instead of going after Kachiko, like the inky cloud before it, this one shot up into the sky. It left a trail of sparks, like a roman candle, then headed to the north.  
  
The child gurgled happily at Kachiko.  
  
A dangerous gleam entered her eye. "So, you think I'm pathetic enough to fall for the same trick twice? Now I really am insulted. For trying to tear my soul out, and ruining my night by making me watch you, meet your demonic type master thing!" Curse delivered, she aimed for the tot again, shears open.   
  
They closed with a loud snap less then a centimeter from the top of Tetsuo's head, clipping off a stray lock.   
  
The child laughed and grabbed onto the closed shears with both hands.  
  
Kachiko lifted up the shears, the child holding on and continuing to laugh. She observed the conspicuous lack of fear. "Hmm. Seems old Shumy-Chan really did evacuate the body that time. Bit showy, if you ask me." She scratched her head with one hand while continuing to keep the child suspended in air. "If I remember my previous experiences with possessions, that means he can't inhabit anyone for a couple of months." She considered the child at the end of her shears. She brought him close and smiled at him. She said in exaggerated talk that adults used on children, "On the other hand, maybe you're still faking it. And in any case, I don't think we can take any chances. Off to the garbage disposal with you."   
  
Kachiko headed back to the house, child merrily dangling by the end of the shears.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi was pleased. It was rare she had a night to herself, and she had enjoyed it tremendously. Having nothing better to do, she decided to go to the movies. It was a bit lonely to go alone, but the film had been an entertaining one which more than made up for the lack of companionship. She had heard it received critical acclaim, and with good reviews, felt certain it would be worth the price of admission. It turned out to be one of those pictures aimed at younger people, centering on a class of high school students. Battle Royal had brought back memories of the not so distant past of Kasumi's own school days. Of course, she hadn't been forced to go to an island and kill all of her classmates, but she was pretty certain had she been placed in such a situation, she could have finished everyone off and won. There were dozens of ways to dispatch her classmates with any one of the weapons that had been provided in the movie. Some very inventive ways, actually. Some of them lingering and painful.  
  
Kasumi was idly fantasizing about being in the movie, and what methods she would have employed in finishing off her former classmates, when her thoughts were interrupted by coming across a familiar figure. "Hello, Auntie. I'm surprised to see you alone. I thought you were with Father and Mr. Saotome."  
  
Nodoka appeared somewhat exasperated. "They decided to go out drinking, and I don't particularly care to hang around them when they act like little boys."   
  
The two women began walking together. The night air was crisp but pleasant as they made their way to the Tendou home. They traveled in silence for a while, until they were almost at their destination.   
  
"Are you certain leaving that tramp... I mean your mother with the child was a good idea?" Nodoka asked.  
  
"Of course. Her motherly nature is there, just waiting to bubble to the surface. Left with a helpless child who has no choice but to depend on her, Mother's parental instincts will surge to the fore, and she will be one step closer to returning to the woman she needs to be." There wasn't the slightest hint of doubt in Kasumi's voice.  
  
Not anywhere so confident, Nodoka left the rest of her recriminations unvoiced as the two arrived at the Tendou house and entered.   
  
As they headed toward the living room, Kasumi announced, "I'm home, Mother. How was your night with little Tetsuo?" And then Kasumi entered the room and had a pretty good idea of how things went.  
  
The living room was in shambles. One side of the of it was burned while a gaping hole letting in the night air dominated the opposite side. Water from broken pipes poured out, forming a tiny pond near the bath. There was a hole in the ceiling, and some of the wiring was dangling halfway to the floor. Furniture was overturned and the place was in shambles.  
  
In the middle of the mess lay Kachiko on her stomach, unmindful of the carnage. Next to her was a laughing Tetsuo, with whom she was playing a game with the blocks. Kachiko looked up and waved at the two women, "Hey, you two!"  
  
Nodoka recoiled in horror while Kasumi sadly shook her head. In a disapproving tone, Kasumi clucked, "Mother, Mother, Mother."  
  
Nodoka was much more aggressive in her admonishment as she rushed forward and snatched the child away, cradling him in her arms and shielding him from Kachiko with her body. "I don't believe this. How irresponsible can you be? We leave a child in your care for several hours, and you destroy the house and endanger his life with your shameless antics." She gave a wave of the hand to the remnants in the room  
  
Kachiko stood up, mortally offended. "Excuse me, but I was the one left with a child who was possessed by a demon that tried kill me. I'd say I did a damn good job of exorcising the annoying jerk and playing with the kid afterwards."  
  
"Possessed by a demon?!" Nodoka shouted. "I cannot believe you'd make up such a ridiculous story to cover up your own reckless behavior and endangerment of the child. Have you no shame? Can't you admit to your wrongdoing?"  
  
"I didn't do anything wrong!"  
  
Kasumi continued shaking her head. "I'm afraid I did make a mistake. I only hope Tetsuo's parents can forgive me."  
  
"They'll probably want to give me a medal for freeing the child from that pesky demon," Kachiko said.   
  
Nodoka shot the girl a nasty stare. "Get away from the child. I'll not let you jeopardize his safety anymore."  
  
Kachiko put her nose up in the air. "Fine. I didn't want to take care of him in the first place. I'm going outside." She headed for the hole in the wall. "And I still want my money." She informed Kasumi before leaving altogether.  
  
Kasumi sighed at the giggling child in Nodoka's arms. It appeared some other plan would be needed. Perhaps if her father successfully wooed Kachiko, that would serve as the trigger to awaken her true identity...  
  
xxxxxxxxx  
  
"That went pretty well," Akane said as she exited the library with Ranma at her side. Study session complete, the pair headed towards home.  
  
"I think I understand the material better," Ranma admitted. He was becoming a bit concerned at Akane's behavior. She didn't seem like herself. Admittedly, with Kachiko's return, Akane had a great deal on her mind most of the time, and even he could tell she was strained when it came to the matter of her mother, but this seemed different somehow. She had been very quiet all evening, like there was something really heavy on her mind. Even Yuka hadn't been able to get her to say more than a handful of words that weren't related to studying. A part of him wanted to ask what was wrong, but another part warned him no good would come from being prying. Best to keep one's nose out of matters unless one wanted to risk it being bitten off. On the other hand, it was Akane that was being considered. He didn't like the idea of something bothering her.  
  
It didn't take Ranma long to decide that he would rather take a chance on making a mistake by doing something instead of not doing it. He asked, while making sure to look in another direction as though he really didn't care, "Something wrong?"  
  
Akane seemed hesitant to speak. She said in a quiet voice, "Not really."  
  
That should have settled matters. If she didn't want to say what it was, then she didn't and that was that. But there was a little voice in the back of Ranma's head that said she didn't mean it, that there was something troubling her, and that he should take steps to fix it. Besides, his asking and her refusal to say anything about it was sort of like admitting that in trying to get her to open up, he had failed. And that was too much like losing to suit his taste.  
  
"Come on, you can tell me," Ranma prodded.   
  
Akane turned her head away. "I said it was nothing."  
  
Her mouth said one thing, but it was obvious from her actions the opposite was true. Like a shark smelling blood in the water, Ranma persisted. "Look, whatever is bothering you, I'll take care of it."  
  
Abruptly, Akane's shoulders took on a strength and determination. She looked Ranma squarely in the eye and said, "Fine. Tonight you're going to tell my Mom that I am your one and only fiancee and that you are not marrying anyone other than me."  
  
Ranma felt his stomach twist into a knot. He had no idea it was this topic that was bothering her. Had he known, he would have avoided it like the plague, to the point of which he would have directed the conversation away from the engagement the moment she broached it. But having invited it in the first place, he didn't know how to avoid things. The best he could come up with was, "That's not a good idea." And tried to walk away.  
  
Before he could manage two steps, Akane placed herself in front of him, arms wide open to prevent any chance of escape. "No. It's time to stop dancing around the issue. You are doing it tonight."  
  
Like a beast in the jaws of an ever closing trap, Ranma began thinking panickedly. He grasped at the first hope of salvation his mind could come up with. "I can't do that because if she stops being interested in me, that means she'll go after Kunou full force, and he's way too interested in her. You don't want them to end up together, do you?"  
  
"That's just an excuse. We'll deal with that when we have to," Akane stated in a firm voice.   
  
Defense countered, Ranma tried another path. "But it would hurt her feelings, being rejected like that. And she's sort of feeling awkward with being in a new time and with no one she knows around. And she gets kind of annoyed with you guys doing, you know, what you're trying to get her to do. I wouldn't want to depress her even more."  
  
Irritated, Akane said, "We're trying to get her to act like our mother, which she is."  
  
"Well, not yet, kind of," Ranma pointed out, though he was uncertain if he was right. Time traveling made explaining things a real pain. He did know Kachiko didn't consider herself to be their mother, and seemed to get more irritated when the people around her tried to make her admit that. He could definitely sympathize with her in that regard. People tried to get him to admit to things he didn't want to all the time. Like Akane was doing right now.  
  
"Quit taking her side," Akane snapped.   
  
"I'm not taking her side. I'm just saying she might not like you guys trying to force her into doing what you want."  
  
Akane said, "We have to because she doesn't realize that what she wants is right here. She thinks she wants you, and that's not acceptable. Which is why you have to make her stop now."  
  
"But I can't just tell her like that," Ranma insisted.  
  
"Yes, you can. What you mean to say is you won't!" Akane's anger doubled. "This is what always gets you into trouble. Your going back and forth and not being decisive is what's causing this mess in the first place. It's just like with Ukyou and the others. You're never firm when you tell them no and that I'm your fiancee and you're not interested in anyone else."  
  
Now fully cornered, Ranma lashed back. "That is not my fault! They take stuff and twist it into what they want to believe. I don't encourage them or anything."  
  
"By not being decisive enough you aren't discouraging them, which is the same thing as encouraging them, which is why you can't be like that around Mom now. Tell her the family pact is not a case of any Tendou being suitable. Tell her you want to marry me."  
  
The idea presented in the last statement made Ranma snap. "I don't want to get married to anyone now!"  
  
Akane recoiled. Through tear-filled eyes, she said, "Fine! Marry her! Marry Kodachi! Marry anyone you want! I don't care anymore!" And ran off into the night.  
  
For a moment, Ranma tensed up and prepared to follow. Then his mind tried picturing what he would say to calm her down. The only thing that he thought would work, accepting her terms, was impossible now. He meant what he said about not wanting the pressure of the engagement hanging over his head. Over the last few days, he found he liked the freedom being guaranteed a delay of several years entailed. It wasn't that he didn't want to be married to... someone eventually. But he couldn't make himself say what Akane wanted him to, or else the pressure would be back on and he would be forced into doing something he definitely didn't want to.  
  
"She's just going to have to understand I can't do that." Ranma decided to give her a chance to cool off and think with a clearer head. Once she calmed down, things would go back to normal, like the always did. Still, it was with his head hung low that he decided to walk around the neighborhood for a while. It would be best to arrive after Akane and avoid any future confrontations for the evening.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
By the time Ranma returned, via the wall around the back yard rather than through the front door, it was late. He was being cautious so he could feel things out in the household, just in case Akane was still angry with him. With any luck, everyone would already be asleep, and he could deal with matters tomorrow after a full night of rest.  
  
He was surprised to see Kachiko was still awake. What was more surprising was that she was pacing back and forth in the middle of the backyard, grumbling to herself in obvious agitation at something.   
  
Silently, Ranma was about to slip back over the wall and try the front door, when his conscience began nagging at him. While it was true his curiosity had cost him peace of mind once tonight, he wanted to know what had upset the time-lost girl. There was always a chance Akane had delivered her ultimatum to Kachiko herself, since Ranma wasn't going to do it. If that had happened, he would have to be very careful for a while, since the situation could be very messy, and he could conceivably be blamed for it by others, even if he wasn't responsible.  
  
Knowing he was going to regret his actions no matter what he did, Ranma again opted to make a mistake from action rather than inaction. He walked up to Kachiko said, "What's wrong?"  
  
Kachiko looked up, seemed decidedly unmoved by his presence, and kicked a stone. It skidded across the ground and into the koi pond with a splash. Like a petulant child, she muttered, "Rotten old hag and stupid frumpy girl."  
  
Translating the identities, Ranma said, "What did Mom and Kasumi do that has you upset?"  
  
That someone seemed interested in her emotional state made Kachiko's attitude shift somewhat. "They didn't believe me when I told them that little kid they left me was possessed by a demon."  
  
"I... see." Ranma was of two minds. Kachiko could be lying --she seemed to do it when it suited her needs-- but at the same demonic possession was far from unheard of in their neighborhood.   
  
Not being treated with open disbelief, Kachiko felt encouraged. "They think I placed his life in jeopardy, when in fact they were the ones who placed my life in jeopardy. I'll admit I wasn't in much danger since the demon was a real wimp, except for that weird cloud thing which made me feel icky. Even after taking a bath I still feel like I was dipped in oil, inside and out." She shuddered once.   
  
Sensing she was telling the truth, largely in part because she wasn't so much trying to convince him as much as complaining about what had happened to her, Ranma asked, "It didn't hurt you too bad, did it?"  
  
"Nah," she said, unconcerned. "But it's the principle involved. I mean, here I am, doing a good deed in getting rid of the demon by exorcising it, and I'm treated like a bad guy. They wouldn't let me talk to the parents because they thought I might mention that the kid was possessed and they would think I was nuts or something. Although I did leave out back and secretly met the parents when they were almost to their house and let them know the kid was clean. They were ecstatic. They said they would quadruple the original baby sitting rate and were going to rename the kid after me, since the name Tetsuo had too many bad memories connected with it. Like him devouring small animals, continuously terrorizing them, committing all sorts of unholy acts, and basically making their lives hell."  
  
"Isn't having a name like Kachiko going to be a bit hard on him?" Ranma asked.  
  
"It's better than being called Shuma-Ghorath-Chan."  
  
"Well, yes. There is no denying that," Ranma admitted.   
  
Kachiko's emotions shifted again, taking on a thoughtful cast. It caused Ranma to wonder just how someone could go through so many opposing emotional states so quickly.   
  
Kachiko said, "You want to know something I learned from all this?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
"I have to admit, before tonight, I was kind of disliked kids. And being attacked by a possessed one did nothing to change my mind," she added. "But something happened. It was after I chased the demon out, and was in the process of stuffing the kid's leg down the garbage disposal, when he looked at me. He had one of those stupid happy faces only children and people with five I.Q points can muster. And even though every other time I saw a kid stare at me like that it made me roll my eyes, this time it was different. I felt kind of affectionate for the little guy. So I stopped and realized it might be kind of fun to play with him for a while. I got to admit it was kind of fun, in a brain dead sort of way. But the kid really enjoyed it, and it made me... I don't know. Kind of happy too. Now I'm thinking maybe I was being a bit harsh. Maybe kids aren't so bad. Especially when it's obvious I'd make a great mother. When I'm older, I mean. Like, thirty or something. Or maybe even as old as your Mom was when she had you. But I think maybe kids aren't quite the evil little burdens I originally envisioned them as. They're actually okay. I think I would like some someday."  
  
Ranma was astonished to see that Kachiko now seemed happy when talking about children. It was like she was a completely different person.   
  
Then she approached Ranma. He was instantly placed on edge by the assessing look she gave him. She walked around in a circle, openly inspecting him, before stopping in front of him again and shaking her head in disapproval.  
  
He definitely didn't like that shake of the head. "What?   
  
"I'm afraid that, whereas I would be a great mother, you would be a crappy father."   
  
Indignant at the slander, Ranma replied automatically, "I would not! I'd be a great father. I'd raise kids just fine."  
  
Kachiko retreated, sticking out her tongue. Playfully, she taunted, "Get real. You couldn't raise a kid. You couldn't even raise a Chia-Pet."   
  
"Could too," Ranma followed not allowing her to get the last word. He responded. "I'd make a great father."   
  
"I bet even a plant would wither under your care," Kachiko mocked, still retreating.   
  
"Take that back," Ranma insisted.  
  
"Nope. Not until you convince me you'd make a good father, " Kachiko continued, now playfully evading Ranma's attempts to keep up with her.  
  
"I'll show you," Ranma said, more concerned with keeping up than exactly how he could convince her.  
  
And up above, from a window on the second floor, a pair of eyes watched the two chase one another around. "Baka, Ranma," Akane said quietly, then turned away from the depressing tableau, laying down in her bed as tears filled her eyes.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
  
End notes: Yep, ended on a more somber note, but there is a bit of seriousness necessary for this to end at its proper conclusion. The series overall is still going to be more humorous in tone, though it is a work in progress.   
  
Shuma-Gorath was a name created by Marvel in the Lovecraftian vein. Most people are probably aware of him from the Marvel Capcom game. Part of Shumy's dialogue was inspired from one of the Hellraiser movies.  
  
Special thanks to  
Michael Chase  
Chris Horton  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
The Apprentice  
Max M. 


	9. The Things We Wish For Chapter 9

The Things We Wish For...  
Chapter 8  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
  
  
Or R+C books at:  
  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident and is with them in the present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko Tendou had a noticeable spring in her step as she hummed to herself and entered the backyard of her home. The day was exceptionally bright and sunny, with hardly a cloud in the sky. It was perfect weather for engaging in an activity she had never been permitted to do by her parents: Sunbathing. The conservative couple had been adamant about the improprieties of showing so much skin, and held the opinion men wanted women to look like pale ghosts. Of course, they also held the opinion women should be meek little mice that should be seen and not heard, and whose sole reason for existence were taking care of their husbands and ushering in the next generation of children. No other extraneous thoughts need enter a woman's head.   
  
Such a lifestyle might have suited her mother, but not Kachiko Tendou. She was destined for better, and infinitely more interesting, things. On the sly she had managed a decent tan the few times she went on trips to the seashore with Sakura, but those had been far in the past (really far in the past, once Kachiko thought about it), and taking one look into the mirror made the time-lost girl grimace in distaste. Steps had to be taken immediately to rectify the problem.  
  
Originally, Kachiko had planned to borrow something from Akane, but the few swimsuits Akane owned had way too much material. The girl didn't own a single two-piece suit. That meant heading to the local shopping mall to pick up some suitable swimwear; a trip had been most enlightening. Times had changed, as evidenced by the fact that what Kachiko had assumed were material to make bikinis, turned out to be bikinis themselves. The items were so small they practically weren't there, which made them perfect.  
  
Kachiko refrained from buying what was termed a thong. It wasn't that she considered it too revealing, just that her attempt to wear one proved that walking around with a string running in between her buttocks was a decidedly uncomfortable experience. So she settled on something small, that bordered on scandalous, if not a touch on the other side.  
  
"And it just might attract Ranma's attention," Kachiko told herself. That was the other reason for taking the time out to tan in the backyard. The poor boy was far too restrained for his own good. One look at Kachiko though, and he couldn't help from loosening up at least a little. She knew Tachi-chan would go through the roof if he saw her in such revealing garb, though he didn't really need much in the way of prodding to be open about his feelings. Usually coming into his line of sight was enough. One thing Kunou had over Ranma was the ability to make a girl feel appreciated.   
  
Kachiko spread out the towel across the grass and smeared tanning lotion on her body. Ranma was supposedly due back from wherever he had gone before too long. That should give her enough time to gain at least a little color, and make it seem as though she was lying inconspicuously in the yard, and that putting herself on display for his benefit was merely a coincidence.   
  
Kachiko had been laying out on her back for no more than fifteen minutes before she heard the door to the house slide open. She rose up and shielded her eyes from the glare, squinting and trying to make out who had emerged. "I should have brought sunglasses," she mumbled as her eyes failed to refocus from the bright glare that had narrowed her irises to almost nothing.  
  
"Hey, Kachi," the familiar voice of Nabiki said.  
  
Her eyes finally adjusting to the light, Kachiko could see that Nabiki had come outside. She carried a sizable basket on her arm and was wearing a two-piece bikini that, while in no way conservative, contained about twice the material Kachiko's did. Of course Nabiki did have more to conceal, Kachiko noted with distaste.   
  
"I saw you laying out, and decided to join you," Nabiki said cheerily as she put down the basket. She pulled a towel from the top of the basket and laid it out next to Kachiko. She then retrieved a radio and sat it down between them. Reaching over, she grabbed the bottle of lotion Kachiko had left out and proceeded to lather herself up.   
  
"How delightful," Kachiko managed without a hint of sincerity. Better company she would have preferred. Actually she would have preferred no company at all compared to Nabiki's presence. Competition she did not need. But without some pretext to force her middle 'daughter' to leave, she'd have to tolerate the annoying pest.   
  
Nabiki finished lotioning in silence. She then reclined on her back, just as Kachiko was, and let out a loud sigh. "It sure is nice out."  
  
"Uh," Kachiko grunted, trying to kill any attempt at conversation before it could begin.  
  
Nabiki seemed content to leave things at that. However, after a few minutes, she turned to Kachiko and said, "Mind if I listen to some music?"  
  
If it'll get you to leave me alone, Kachiko barely refrained from saying. Instead she got out a neutral, "Sure."   
  
Nabiki leaned over and pushed a button on the CD player. Instantly, a song began to play:  
  
~I must!  
~I must!  
~I must increase my bust!  
~I must!  
~I must!  
~I must increase my bust!  
  
Nabiki smiled evilly at Kachiko, whose entire body jerked as the first chorus ended. Some of Nabiki's amusement disappeared when she heard the muscles in Kachiko's neck, tensed beyond all measure, actually groan in protest as her head slowly, inexorably turned in Nabiki's direction. Further amusement died as she saw the rictus smile plastered across Kachiko's features, and that her eyes were shot through with so much red it was painful to look.  
  
"It's a bit loud," Kachiko said, smile not faltering in the slightest. "I'm going to turn it down." She picked up the radio, and brought it down over the top of her head, rending plastic and wires as she shattered it in two. As though she had done nothing more than adjust a dial, she carefully set the two pieces down, as if they were delicate pieces of china. "That's better," she informed Nabiki, her smile now somewhat back to normal.  
  
That hadn't worked out quite as she planned. Nabiki decided to cut her losses and lay back so that she could work on her tan.  
  
Kachiko was seething insider, trying to come up with some means of retaliation for that not so subtle jab. There was no way such a conniving girl could ever be her daughter. And her chest was too big to be her offspring. Children weren't supposed to one up their parents, Kachiko excluded from the rule, naturally.   
  
The first edges of a plan involving hamsters, grease, and duct tape had just started to form when Kachiko heard the door to the house slide open. Her eyes had once again shifted to the huge amount of light, forcing her to squint. Kachiko could just make out the outline of a young man with tousled hair coming through the doorway. The figure, who could only be one person, gave a hesitant, "Ah," and scratched his head.  
  
Kachiko was up in an instant, vaulting into a handspring and hurling herself through the air towards Ranma. She would prove to Nabiki she had a desirable body and that men weren't only interested in big chests.   
  
"Oops!" Kachiko cried out, pretending to stumble forward into Ranma. She then 'slipped' her hands around his neck, forcing his head down and into her chest.  
  
"It's so nice to see you, Ranma," she cooed, keeping his head snuggled firmly between her breasts.  
  
There was a loud, "Ack!" and Kachiko felt Ranma suddenly go limp in her arms, forcing her to support him. Something wet then started to trickle down her chest.   
  
"What the heck?" Kachiko said, and pulled Ranma's head away.  
  
Her eyes finally having a chance to adjust to the light, Kachiko saw that the figure whom she had assumed to be Ranma was nothing of the kind. It was somebody Ranma's age, with approximately the same color hair, height, and weight, which explained the confusion. The most notable thing about him was the yellow bandanna with black stripes wrapped around his forehead. Currently he was unconscious, a huge gout of blood trickling from his nose, that was the source of the wet substance Kachiko had felt on her stomach.   
  
"Ahh! This isn't Ranma! It's some pervert!" She dropped the boy she had been supporting like a rock, allowing his head to thump loudly to the ground.  
  
Nabiki looked over the scene with an amused grin. "Not quite. His name is Ryouga. He drops by sometimes. He's someone that hangs around Ranma. They're sort of friends in the same sense you and that Wakaba girl were."  
  
That made Kachiko relax. That meant he was one of Ranma's best friends in the whole world, and probably not a pervert that had tried for a cheap thrill by impersonating Ranma and receiving some 'special treatment' from her. "He's injured." She pointed at the blood.  
  
Nabiki shook her head. "He tends to pass out at the sight of a little female flesh."  
  
Kachiko reconsidered him. "Oh, so he's a weenie boy." She shook her head distastefully. While she didn't like her men lecherous, like Icky Slutzensin, she didn't care for weenie boys that passed out at the sight of a little skin either. She wanted someone between the two extremes.   
  
Since Ryouga's life wasn't in any danger, and seeing she had some blood decorating her chest, she removed the fallen boy's bandanna and used it to wipe off the blood.  
  
As her attention was riveted to wiping her body, Soun emerged from the house. "Is everything all right? I thought I heard a..." his voice trailed off as he espied his wife, standing in a swimsuit far smaller than he had ever seen her wear before. The shock of seeing someone he had been married to for so many years in such revealing garb, and in better shape than she had been when they were married, combined with over ten years of abstinence, had an odd effect upon him. His mind seem to shut down, as more basic instincts took over. His eyes took on a vacant stare, drool trickled down his chin, and he raised his arms up and began to walk slowly forward. "Kachiiii."   
  
Turning from her cleaning, Kachiko noticed him from the first time. She screeched, "AHHH! The old guy's been turned into a zombie!" and proceeded to level a hard kick right into him, punting him well over the wall and out of sight.   
  
Nabiki made a clucking noise with her tongue. "Geez, Kachi, you aren't ever happy, are you? You dress in next to nothing to get guys' attention, then complain when you get it."  
  
"I don't want creepy old guys going for a grope or weenie boys bleeding on me," Kachiko explained. Her eyes took on a sinister glint. "Sounds to me like you're jealous that they're going after me instead of you."  
  
Nabiki's eyebrow twitched. "You have got to be kidding. I am way more attractive, and have a much better body, than you." Nabiki thrust out her chest.  
  
Kachiko's eyebrow twitched back in annoyance. "Yes, but looks only take you so far, especially when attitude can scare guys away. It's not like you've had a lot of men dropping by asking for you, now is it?"  
  
"I have been on plenty of dates!" Nabiki shot back.  
  
Sensing blood in the water, Kachiko pressed forward. "But how many of them have gone out with you more than once? I bet you hit them up for every yen you can milk out of them and don't give anything in return, other than a cold shoulder."  
  
Nabiki growled slightly.  
  
Kachiko taunted, "I heard someone the other day say getting to first base with Nabiki means she doesn't lunge for your wallet in the first hour."  
  
"At least I don't hit on engaged men or deluded jerks!" Nabiki shot back.  
  
Kachiko snorted. "Ranma obviously isn't comfortable with this whole engagement thing or he wouldn't have agreed to postponing it so quickly. And if you don't appreciate a guy like Tachi-chan, then you're an even greater lost cause than I thought."  
  
"At least I have some pride and don't throw myself at guys and hop into the sack with them like some slut!"  
  
It was Kachiko's turn to become angry. "I'll have you know I've never let a guy get farther than second base, and only one even made it that far! But even so, I'd rather be known as a slut than some frigid bitch!"  
  
Nabiki walked forward until she was right next to Kachiko. "What did you call me?!"  
  
Kachiko shivered. "It's suddenly so cold my nipples are hard enough to cut glass." She fingered her top to emphasize the point.  
  
Nabiki was in a state she had rarely fallen into the last few years; one of trembling anger. "You're really asking for it!"  
  
Kachiko quaked in mock fear. "Oh no, you're going to run some kind of simple-minded scam on me, aren't you? Woe is me. Whatever shall I do in the face of such terror?"  
  
Nabiki snarled at Kachiko, who didn't back off an inch, and met her squarely eye-to-eye. Lightning seemed to dance between their baleful glares as they squared off with one another.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Inside the house, Kasumi turned from the cupboard she was cleaning. She thought she heard the sounds of someone arguing in the backyard. What was curious was that the usual cause of such disruptions, Ranma or Akane, were both out. She hoped it wasn't something her father had done to her mother. Kasumi kept telling him to take things slowly, but far too often he seemed to lose control in Kachiko's presence and wasn't making any progress at all. Kasumi had tried coming up with a plan to bring them closer together, but nothing came to mind. If only someone would kidnap Kachiko, then her father could rescue her, just like Ranma did with Akane on several occasions, and then they could grow closer to one another.  
  
Kasumi was pondering who might be interested in abducting her mother when there was a knock at the front door. Her train of thought lost, she went to the door and opened it.  
  
Pantyhose Tarou waved pleasantly at her. "Hey there. How are you doing? You're Akane's sister, Kasumi, right?"  
  
"Why yes, I am," Kasumi bowed. "Can I help you?"  
  
"I'm looking for Ranma. I need to beat the shit out of him before tomorrow. Is he around?"  
  
"I'm afraid not," Kasumi was taken a bit aback by both the youth's rough demeanor and his stated intentions. Although curiously he didn't seem angry, just very businesslike.  
  
"I'll wait for him to come back," Tarou said, allowing himself inside and looking around, obviously searching for someone. "I'll stay out of your way."  
  
"Um, sure. I suppose so," Kasumi said. He was a bit on the rude side, but perhaps whatever reason he wanted to beat Ranma up for was important.   
  
Tarou's ears perked up at the sounds of an argument coming from outside. He immediately headed towards the noise. Within moments he had navigated his way through the house and out to the backyard.  
  
He smiled as he spotted the two girls snarling and staring daggers at one another. Out loud, he said, "Sweet, a catfight with girls in bikinis. Don't let me interrupt you. My money's on you, Akane."  
  
Both heads turned to the source of the disturbance. Kachiko's anger momentarily abated, and her eyes took on a more evaluative glare. "Who's this?"  
  
Nabiki backed away slightly, allowing her mother to stand between her and Tarou. Quietly, she said, "His name is Pantyhose Tarou. He's a pain in the ass like you. Whenever he shows up, trouble follows." And he was one of the few people Nabiki regarded as actually being dangerous. Kachiko was just an annoyance that got under the skin (and cost a fair bit of money). Tarou was far was worse than that, if the others' descriptions were the least bit accurate. He had a fairly devious mind and a lot of power he was unafraid to use to get what he wanted.   
  
"What's he doing here?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"I don't know, but it can't be for anything good." Nabiki admitted. "And if he's smiling, that means it's almost certainly something bad for everyone else."  
  
Kachiko scowled at the youth. She sensed a great deal of power from him, almost equal to Ranma's, whatever difference between them being negligible. Also, she didn't like the looks of him either. He exuded an aura of danger. Nabiki's change in demeanor and caution felt merited, rather than the warning being some scheme she used to play with Kachiko's mind.  
  
Kachiko walked forward. Tarou gave an appreciative whistle. "Looking good there, Akane. Not the sort of thing I ever thought I'd see you wear. Say, did you change your hair? You look different."  
  
"My name is Kachiko, not Akane," she said as she walked forward until she was next to Tarou.  
  
Tarou nodded his head in understanding. "I see now. Yeah, you do look different from her. Family relation?"  
  
"Sort of," she said. "What brings you here, Mr. Pantyhose?"  
  
He flinched at hearing his name aloud. "It's just Tarou. Anyway, I dropped by to kick Ranma's butt. It's not personal, this time. I just need to make sure he's out of the way for the next day or two. He due back soon?"  
  
Kachiko looked over Tarou's shoulder and said, "Good timing. There he is now."  
  
"What?!" Tarou spun on his heel, rapidly tensing up in order to fight Ranma. Only when he turned around, he saw no one. "Where did he go?"  
  
A foot came up from behind and found its way between Tarou's legs. He howled in pain, and doubled over in agony.   
  
Kachiko grabbed him by the back of his shirt and heaved him into the koi pond, his wincing form making a loud splash. She said to the pond. "That's what you get for trying to ambush up my Ranma." She slapped her hands together, and gave a satisfied grin to Nabiki. "That takes care of that."  
  
There was a loud eruption from the pond as water flew everywhere and an inhuman roar reverberated throughout the neighborhood, making Kachiko's hair stand on end. Reluctantly, she turned around, immediately wincing at the monstrosity that was now standing in the pond.   
  
"Oops. I didn't see that one coming," Kachiko admitted as the cursed form of Pantyhose Tarou ominously began making its way to her.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma wasn't in the Tendou home for more than minute before he sensed something amiss. He entered the living room and spotted Nabiki watching the television. Everything appeared all right on the surface, but there was definitely something lingering in the air; something not right.  
  
She waved to Ranma. "Tarou came by to cause some trouble. Kachi tried to take him out first. Big mistake."  
  
Whenever Pantyhose came around, trouble followed. That he was specifically trying to find Ranma made it infinitely worse. "What? Where is she?"  
  
Nabiki pointed up at the ceiling. "In her bedroom. Kasumi's taking care of her. He didn't rough her up too bad, despite the shot to the nuts. I think she caught him on a good day, Well, that and the fact her top got ripped off after his first couple of punches. I think seeing her like that distracted him. Not that she had much to distract him with," she added acidly.   
  
Ranma was upstairs in an instant. He rushed into what had formerly been Akane's room and saw Kasumi sitting on a chair next to the bed staring mournfully at it. On the bed was a human-sized lump under the covers. He couldn't see who it was as a second, smaller sheet was completely over its head, reminiscent of a funeral shroud.   
  
Ranma's eyes widened. Nabiki had said it wasn't bad. How could she have been so wrong? He shouted, "Kachi!" and lunged into the room.  
  
A cry of alarm came from beneath the shroud. "Ahhh! Don't come in here, Ranma! I don't want you to see me like this!"  
  
Ranma stopped dead in his tracks at the 'body' screeching and wriggling around. "What's going on?"  
  
The concealed Kachiko sat up, keeping the sheet over her head and wrapping the blanket around her torso. "No, I won't let you see me." She jumped out of bed, hands still over sheet and blanket, and ran for the doorway. She missed it by a good three feet as she instead slammed hard into the wall next to the door, and bounced off.  
  
"I could have sworn there was a door there," Kachiko said, before loosening her hold on the sheets and slumping to her butt on the floor.   
  
Ranma moved forward to make sure she was all right. As the covers fell away, he received a look at what Kachiko had been hiding under the smaller sheet. "Wow, that's a pretty good shiner you have there."  
  
The statement shook Kachiko back into the real world. She clutched at her face in horror, then grabbed the fallen sheet with both hands and held it over her head. "Wah! Ranma's seen how ugly I am! Now he'll never want to go out with me!"  
  
"Ah, it's only a black eye," Ranma said, completely failing to understand what was going on.  
  
"It's a horrifying disfigurement!" Kachiko cried.   
  
"It's just a black eye," Ranma insisted.   
  
At that point, Kasumi said, "Ranma, I don't think you should really be staring at mother's breasts like that."  
  
"What?" Ranma started to ask, then realized that at the same time the sheet had fallen from Kachiko's face, the blanket wrapped around her body had also fallen away. Unlike her 'shroud', Kachiko had failed to pick that one up again. He hadn't even realized what had happened because the black eye had caught his attention first.  
  
Ranma covered his eyes. "I'm not looking at her chest!"  
  
Beneath the cloth, Kachiko cried out, "See? He thinks I'm so repulsive he won't even look at my body! Wah!"  
  
"That's not it!" Ranma assured her. "Look, you're overreacting. Black eyes go away."  
  
Refusing to be comforted, Kachiko cried out, "Every time you look at me from now on, you'll only picture me with this horrifying disfigurement and you'll be repulsed by the very sight of me!"  
  
Ranma shook his head sadly. "Believe me, if I can look at Akane sprouting whiskers and not be repulsed by the sight, a black eye ain't nothing."  
  
Kachiko's sniffling subsided. "Akane had whiskers? Her harelip problem must be way worse than mine."  
  
"Cat's whiskers," Ranma clarified. "It was a side-effect from some super soba she ate."  
  
The sheet fell away from Kachiko's face. "Wow! She must have looked like a real freak. Do you have any pictures?"  
  
Ranma said, "Ah, no. It wasn't the sort of thing Akane wanted saved for posterity."  
  
Now recovered from her emotional turmoil in record time, Kachiko rewrapped the blanket around her body. "You can look now," she said.  
  
Ranma peeked through the fingers covering his eyes, saw Kachiko was indeed telling the truth, and removed his hands altogether. "Now what's this about Pantyhose coming by and beating you up?"  
  
Kachiko said, "Actually, he came by to beat you up. I couldn't let him do that, so I tried my best to take him out before he could attack you."  
  
"You shouldn't have done that!" Ranma said with more than a touch of anger. "I can take care of myself. Tarou's dangerous."  
  
Kachiko looked aghast at the idea. "You couldn't expect me to stand idly by while he laid in ambush, waiting to beat you up."  
  
"He could have hurt you," Ranma protested.   
  
"I can take care of myself, and I'm responsible for my own actions. If I want to leap to your defense, I'm going to do it no matter what you say. You don't like it; I don't care. I'll do it anyway," Kachiko stated firmly, crossing her arms defiantly under the bed sheet wrapped around her torso.  
  
Ranma wanted to argue further, but let it go. He sensed any attempt to change her mind would be a long and drawn out battle that he didn't feel up to, given how guilty he felt about her getting a black eye for his sake. Besides, no matter how often he tried, he never seemed to be able to change any female's mind. He had tried it often with lots of different women and never once been satisfied with the results.  
  
Kachiko continued. "I was winning too, only that rat had another one of those curse things and tricked me into throwing him into the pond. After that, well, he doesn't suck when he's that big, let me tell you. What did you do that would make him want to beat you up?"  
  
Ranma shrugged. "I haven't seen him since the big fight with Rouge. I can't come up with a reason why. Of course, this is Pantyhose we're talking about, and he's not exactly the most peaceful guy around. If he thinks beating me up is in his best interest, he wouldn't hesitate to do it." Ranma placed his hand to his chin in thought. "But for the life of me I can't figure out why he'd want to."  
  
"I might be able to answer that," Nabiki said, producing a small poster, about the same size as the ones the CLAP hung everywhere to identify 'perverts'. "Pantyhose dropped it when Kachi tossed him into the pond." She handed it to Ranma.  
  
He read it. "It says here there's a race tomorrow outside of Nerima. Some sort of obstacle course thing. Aw, they have an entry fee for it. Why would I want to pay to go through some obstacle course? My life is already full of lots of obstacles and I don't have to pay for any of them."  
  
"Read all the way to the bottom," Nabiki said in a tired voice.  
  
Ranma did so. "Third Prize is a slap to the face. Second Prize is a month's supply of Rice O'Roni. First Prize is... a ring that can control curses?!"  
  
Kachiko eagerly said, "Ohhh. Rice O'Roni. It's a treat even outside of San Francisco. Sign me up!"   
  
"I have to have it!" Ranma shouted.  
  
"I didn't know Ranma was so big on rice," Kachiko whispered to Kasumi.  
  
"I think he's more concerned about the curse controlling ring," Kasumi pointed out.  
  
"Oh. Well, it's not like I have a curse, so after I win, he's more than welcome to..." Kachiko trailed off as an errant thought occurred to her. If she won the contest, and gave the curse control ring to Ranma, then he'd owe her one. She might even be able to get a date out of him. But it would mean giving up the Rice O'Roni. Matters of the heart or matters of the stomach; which was more important?  
  
It was more likely she could acquire money to purchase an equivalent amount of rice than find something else to get Ranma to agree to a date. To Ranma, she said, "Don't worry. I'll win the race and get you that ring you want so bad. Although don't think for one second that I'm proposing by giving you a ring. I like taking things a wee bit slower than that."  
  
"Yeah, right," Ranma scoffed. "I'm going to enter the race and win it."  
  
Kachiko gave a laugh, one full of superiority. "Oh, poor, foolish Ranma. I've been through so many of these things I'm known as the Queen of the Obstacle Course."  
  
"You made that up," Nabiki said flatly.   
  
"Did not!" Kachiko shot back. She was too known as the Queen of the Obstacle Course. Of course, she was the only one that actually used the title, but that didn't mean she wasn't known as it. "Wakaba used to run me through them all the time to help build up my reflexes. She had them all: Pit traps, pendulums, flame throwers, land mines, piranha filled pools, ferocious tigers, and even ravenous rabbits."  
  
"Ravenous rabbits don't sound like much of an obstacle," Nabiki said.  
  
"They are when there's five hundred of them and you've had a barrel full of carrot-scented perfume dumped on you," Kachiko assured her.   
  
The sound of footsteps hurrying toward the room came to everyone's ears. Akane appeared a moment later. "Mom, I heard you were hurt. Ouch! That's a pretty big black eye."  
  
"Ranma said he loves me no matter what I look like," Kachiko said dreamily.  
  
Akane shot Ranma a shocked, then angry glare.   
  
Ranma let out a strangled noise and quickly blurted out more to Akane than Kachiko, "I did not say that! I said your black eye would go away and it wasn't anything to feel bad about."  
  
"Sounds like a commitment to me," Kachiko said.  
  
"Only to those that need to be committed," Nabiki added dryly.  
  
Akane's eyebrow started to twitch madly when she spotted the paper in Ranma's hand. A few words on it caught her attention, and deflected her anger. "What's this?" she asked, pulling it out from his hands.   
  
Her eyes pored over the text. Upon reading to the bottom, a bright smile lit up her features. "This is great, Ranma. If I win this race, you won't have to worry about changing into a girl against your will."  
  
"Actually, I'm going to be winning it," Ranma pointed out.  
  
"I am," Kachiko corrected. "After all, I'm not known as the Queen of the Obstacle Course for nothing."  
  
"You made that up," Akane said flatly.  
  
"I did not!" Kachiko insisted.  
  
Kasumi patted Kachiko's head. "I believe you were called the Queen of the Obstacle Course, Mother."  
  
Kachiko pointed at Kasumi and said to Akane and Nabiki, "See? This is how a proper daughter is supposed to act. You should believe everything your mother tells you."  
  
Bitterly, Nabiki snapped. "Right! Like when you told me our dog wasn't around anymore because he got a new job in a junkyard and had to relocate to Singapore?!"  
  
Caught off guard by the accusation, Kachiko said, "I never told you that."  
  
Hesitantly, Kasumi said, "Technically, you did. We used to have a family dog about eleven years ago. His name was Akuma. He was sort of a mix of Irish setter, golden retriever, boxer, and German pinscher."  
  
"So he was a mutt?" Kachiko said.  
  
"Well, that is a bit blunt, but accurate," Kasumi agreed. "He was a touch ill-tempered."  
  
"He was not! He was a sweet and lovable dog!" Nabiki insisted.  
  
Akane entered the conversation. "He always snarled at me and treated me like his personal chew toy. He was nearly twice as big as me and was terrifying. I didn't like him at all."  
  
Nabiki said, "He kept you from drowning in a river once."  
  
"He was the one that chased me into it in the first place!" Akane snapped. "And he didn't save me. He was running after me so hard that he didn't stop in time and fell in, too. He was saving himself. I only got out because I clung to his back." Akane shuddered at the memory. "It's one of the reasons I don't like dogs. Pigs are much better as pets."  
  
"Yeah, they never try to bite or chase you around," Ranma said sarcastically.  
  
Kasumi said, "Nabiki was the only one that he liked, and she got along with him, too. They loved each other very much. The two would play with each other for hours. But one day he was run over by a car. So instead of telling Nabiki what really happened, you said that he got a new job."  
  
"I called every junkyard in Singapore looking for him," Nabiki said, her voice full of emotion. "There was over five hundred of them, by the way, and I don't know how to speak Chinese."  
  
"You and Father nearly had a heart attack over the phone bill," Kasumi informed her mother.  
  
Kachiko gave Nabiki a soft look. "I'm sorry. The next time you lose a pet, I won't lie. I'll be sure to let you know he was turned into a roadpancake."   
  
Kasumi looked at her mother askance, "Actually, that's exactly what you told Akane and me. I was a little sad. Akane cheered."  
  
"I absolutely hated that dog," Akane confirmed.   
  
Kasumi told her mother, "Father said we probably shouldn't be so blunt with Nabiki, saying something about your sense of humor traumatizing her enough already, so you came up with that instead."  
  
"I'm not surprised." Kachiko turned to Nabiki. "Given how much you whine now about losing money, I can't imagine how much worse you were when you were five."  
  
"The point is you used to lie to us all the time," Nabiki said.  
  
"Probably to teach you not to be gullible," Kachiko retorted. "Are you gullible?"  
  
Nabiki considered that. Slowly, she said, "No. Not really."  
  
"Obviously it worked," Kachiko said satisfactorily.  
  
"Horribly enough, I can actually picture you doing that," Nabiki said, annoyed that Kachiko probably had just won the argument.   
  
The entire conversation had passed by Ranma without a thought; he was off in his own little world. "Just you wait. By tomorrow, I'll be rid of changing into a girl." He left the room, singing and dancing to a personal tune of, "Never gonna be a girl again. Never gonna be a girl again."  
  
xxxxxxxxxx  
  
The hour was getting late as Ranma prepared to head to his room to catch some sleep. Anxiousness over laying his hands on the ring made him awake and alert long past his usual bedtime. Gaining some control over his eagerness, Ranma made his way to his room. Just as he was about to enter, he noticed Akane emerging from the bathroom, already dressed in her pajamas.   
  
"What are you doing up?" he asked.  
  
"I'm a little nervous about the race tomorrow. This could be your big chance to control your curse," Akane explained.  
  
Ranma was genuinely moved by the concern. He was trying to figure out how to thank her, without being too blunt so she would read something into it that wasn't there and become creeped out, when he heard movement coming from the living room. He saw the noise had caught Akane's attention too, and she was looking in the same direction.   
  
Ranma moved Akane behind him and tensed for a fight. "Maybe Tarou's come back again to try to take out the competition early." He sneaked forward, Akane following behind far enough to stay out of Ranma's way but still close enough to help if she could.  
  
The pair emerged into the living room and were taken aback by what was there. "What are you doing, Kachi?" Ranma asked.  
  
Kachiko turned away from the pile of items she had been working on. "I'm preparing for tomorrow's battle. That Tarou guy is tough, but with the information you've given me, I know I can outsmart that oversized bovine."  
  
Ranma gave a dismissive wave of his hand. "You don't have to worry about him. I can handle Bull-Butt, no problem. I've beaten him before."  
  
"He's still dangerous," Kachiko warned.   
  
"Ah, he ain't nothing," Ranma bragged. "You're looking at someone who beat a god once."  
  
Kachiko rolled her eyes at the declaration. "Oh, please. I've heard some pretty tall tales in my time, but beating a god? You can't expect anyone to actually believe that."  
  
"It's true," Akane confirmed. "I was there. Ranma beat him."  
  
Sensing Akane's sincerity, Kachiko's expression of dubiousness became one of awe. "That's amazing. I knew you were tough, but I didn't think you were that powerful. I'm seriously impressed."  
  
Ranma laughed confidently at the praise, but didn't deny it. It was the truth, after all.  
  
Kachiko continued looking at Ranma appreciatively. "I never beat a god. I did beat someone that claimed he was a god, but he was full of crap."  
  
"Really?" Akane asked, interested in hearing what her mother had to say.  
  
Seeing Ranma was attentive as well, Kachiko began to explain. "Actually it's kind of a funny story. You see, it sort of began because I accidentally destroyed this treasure map Gosenkugi had, and it was totally not my fault. Since Gos was an acquaintance, and I felt kind of bad for him, I promised him I'd replace it. I asked around about important maps. Eventually I heard these rumors about this ancient lost race living in the inland of China having a map that led to some magical place.   
  
"Naturally, I went to find them and get the map. The usual gang followed since it was going to be fun. Once I got there, I find these guys pretty easily, only there was a little complication. There was this big jerk with a stupid set of wings that went around saying he was god and how lowly people like me had no right challenging him for the map since he was a god and everything and I was just a worm. So after he finishes with his speech about how great he is, and how unimportant I am, I said to him, 'How do you figure you're a god?' And he tells me how he can basically fly and shoot flames. So of course I say I really don't think having abilities that are a cross between a sparrow and an oversized lighter really constitutes divinity. Well, he flipped his birdy little brain and attacked me. Can you believe that?"  
  
Both Akane and Ranma looked at each other, then turned their attention back to Kachi. Slowly, Ranma said, "He shot flames and could fly?"  
  
"Yeah, but it was no problem. It's not like he was dangerous or anything," Kachiko said with a dismissive wave of her hand. "The smaller flames I could just dodge out of the way. For the really big blasts he tossed around, well, it's like when you're training by the ocean. You don't try to stop a whole wave, you ride it out to avoid harm. So I used the same technique that lets you walk across hot coals without getting burned, amplified about a hundred times, and rode out the blasts the way you would surfing waves. I mean 'Mr. Bird God' was seriously a one-trick pony with fire being the only thing he could do. Okay, his whole regeneration thing was a bit tricky, but I would have eventually figured a way around it and kicked his ass good and proper, but it turned out I didn't have to. Wakaba helped me out by giving me a chance to trick him into dive bombing into a vat full of liquid nitrogen."   
  
Kachiko didn't feel the need to mention that Wakaba had been so caught up in the action that she had mistakenly told Kachiko, 'Jump into the vat and you won't have to worry about the bird guy anymore.' Kachiko had tensed up to dive into it, but slipped and fell flat on the ground. It proved to be most opportune, since at that very moment the bird brain had swooped down on her with some kind of weird-looking spear and tried to impale her with it. Instead, he missed and ended up plunging into the vat of liquid nitrogen instead. Wakaba had been so ashamed of nearly screwing up that she had cried for hours afterward. Kachiko tried to console her and said she understood that people often made mistakes when under pressure, but it had done little good; Wakaba wailed for just about forever. Kachiko again thanked the stars for being blessed with good friends that cared about her well being.  
  
"You... beat... him?" Ranma barely managed to get out.  
  
"Yeah. It was easy. We're talking instant birdcicle," Kachiko bragged. "So I told all the remaining bird people that if they didn't cough up the map, all the king's horses and all the king's men wouldn't be able to put Humpty Ice-cube back together again. So they handed us the map and we helped them thaw out bird brain. Only it turned out that he had been frozen too fast or something, and he, get this, reverted to being in an egg. You should have heard them whining about how it would take years for him to hatch again and heat up the joint, which was just plain stupid. I mean they're half birds. When it gets cold, all they need to do is fly south for the winter." Kachiko stated it as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.  
  
"You... took... their... map?" Akane said, trembling slightly.  
  
Kachiko laughed nervously. "Well about the map. A funny thing happened. I really did intend to give it to Gos, but I sort of, and this is the funny part, lost it in a card game while I was in China. If I recall correctly, it was to some guide running a famous hot spring or something. I wanted to check it out, since it would be cool to visit a foreign hot spring, but Sakura said it was time to go back home so we left instead. She could put a real damper on things sometimes. Anyway, the whole thing turned out to be a big waste of time. Pretty funny, huh?" Kachiko asked...  
  
...And looked into two faces whose glare alone threatened to pull her into a hellish abyss where her soul would be damned for an eternity.  
  
"What?! What?!" Kachiko cringing back in fright.  
  
A miasma of hatred clung to Ranma as he said is slow, dangerous tones, "You mean to tell me that from hauling my butt halfway across a continent...."  
  
"To being kidnapped...," Akane added.  
  
"To nearly being frozen to death...."  
  
"To nearly being drowned...."  
  
"To nearly being boiled alive...."  
  
"To being shrunk to the size of a doll...."  
  
"WAS ALL YOUR FAULT?!!" the pair said as one.  
  
"What are you two talking about?" Kachiko backed away, realizing neither was in the mood to give her answer that didn't involve tremendous amounts of violence, and prepared to retreat to somewhere, like Hokkaido.  
  
She wasn't anywhere near fast enough as two irate martial artists fell upon her.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
It was morning as Kasumi happily started breakfast and prepared to feed the majority of her family.  
  
She was in the middle of steaming some rice when Kachiko staggered into the kitchen. Kasumi turned to her and said, "Good morning, Mother."  
  
"Ur," Kachiko groaned, heading directly for the refrigerator. She flung open the door, grabbed something with alcohol in it, removed the top and drank nearly a third of the contents in one gulp.  
  
Kasumi stared in disapproval at the display. "It's really a bit early to drink so heavily, don't you think?  
  
"Ur," Kachiko said again.  
  
Kasumi noticed something odd, besides the fact no one had had to drag Kachiko out of bed. "Mother?"  
  
"Ur."  
  
"I thought it was your other eye that was black."  
  
Kachiko stared balefully at Kasumi, then wandered out of the room, mumbling, "Stupid jerks blaming me for all their stupid problems they stupidly get into like it's my fault. I'll show them. I'll win the race and give first prize to Pantybull just to piss them off," Kachiko swore as she headed up for her room, bottle in hand.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The race site looked like any other, save that it was taking place in some sort of park that hadn't been there the day before. But racing courses that sprang up overnight was hardly cause for concern, in Ranma's opinion. He had seen weirder things, and it showed the people throwing the race did indeed have access to magic. No way would it be a fiasco, like the take-out race. Even Pantyhose knew these guys had the item they claimed, since he was taking the competition so seriously. Soon, Ranma would have the next best thing to a cure in hand, once the officials showed up.  
  
"Never going to be a girl again," Ranma hummed to himself.  
  
Akane, who was standing next to him, warned, "Maybe you should win the race first before bragging about it."  
  
Ranma looked over the competition that waited around the starting line nearby. There was an assortment of people that had gathered for it, though Ranma did not recognize any of them. The Amazons were out of town, which meant no Mousse or Shampoo, and evidently Ryouga hadn't stumbled onto it yet. None of the folks looked like competition in the slightest, except Tarou, who was currently keeping his distance at the far side of the gathering.  
  
Ranma turned to some guy standing nearby. He was dressed in an outlandish red spandex bodysuit with a yellow lightning bolt across the chest. "And what are you supposed to be?"  
  
"I'm Jiminy Quick," the man boasted. "The fastest man alive."  
  
"Yeah, right, I'd like to see you prove that," Ranma said.  
  
"I already did," Jiminy boasted.  
  
Ranma stared at the man. He hadn't even moved. "What do you mean?"  
  
"I like those cornrows in your hair."  
  
"I don't have any..." Ranma trailed off as he felt that not only had his pig-tail been undone, but that all of the hair at the back of his head had indeed been retied into cornrows.  
  
Jiminy laughed. "I'm so fast, I'll win this race before it begins."  
  
"No way!" Ranma insisted. "Now that I'm ready, you can't do that to me again."  
  
"Nice bra," Jiminy bragged.  
  
Ranma felt his chest, then pulled his shirt up. He discovered he was now sporting a white athletic bra. "Ack!" he cried out, and tried to remove it.  
  
"Hey, that's mine!" Akane exclaimed, grabbing at her own chest and feeling a lack of something that was there a moment ago.  
  
"I needed to prove a point. It's not like I walk around with bras," Jiminy said, laughing so hard he doubled over. When he looked back up, he saw that Akane was now in front of him, fist pulled back.   
  
"You pervert!" she exclaimed, punching him hard and sending him into a wall, which collapsed around him from the impact and fell on top of him. When the dust settled, all that was left was two yellow booted feet sticking up from the rubble.  
  
"No one's fast enough to evade Akane's righteous anger," Ranma informed the pile, handing the bra back to the fuming Akane.  
  
Tarou moved from the far side of the course and approached the pair. He snickered at Ranma. "So, Fem-boy, ready to watch me win this race and make you look like the loser you are?"  
  
"Tough talk coming from someone that felt so threatened he tried to ambush me. And you still have to pay for roughing up Kachi," Ranma threatened.  
  
Tarou didn't appear the least bit concerned. "If she had minded her own business, she wouldn't have gotten hurt. Besides, I only popped her twice. She could take it."  
  
"Why you--!" Ranma intoned, but was interrupted by a disturbance from the empty judges' stand.  
  
In a flash of light and a puff of brimstone, a quintet of figures appeared on the stand. One figure was at the forefront, the other four flanking him two to a side and slightly behind. All of them were shrouded in voluminous black robes that concealed their entire bodies, making their true size impossible to tell. Hoods were pulled over four of the beings' heads so as to entirely conceal their faces from view. Only the one in the front had his hood pulled back far enough to allow light to touch what lay underneath, revealing what lay within. Rather than the face of a person, all that showed was a bright silver mask. It was a plain thing, with eyeslits as its only feature. Within those slits were not the expected presence of eyes, but rather a sickly green luminescence that shone through.   
  
A voice boomed from the masked figure, "All those who would dare lay their eyes upon my august personage, kneel before their God King and Eternal Emperor!"  
  
One of the shrouded figures cleared his throat. "Actually, Lord Asmodeous, we aren't in control of these lands. They aren't under any obligation to bow to you."  
  
Emerald fire flared briefly from the eyes as the masked figure turned its baleful gaze upon the subordinate. "Really?"  
  
"I'm afraid so, your Eternal Obliviousness," the figure confirmed.  
  
Turing back to the crowd, Asmodeous's voice boomed out, "Very well, you do not have to kneel, though if you want to, feel free."   
  
No one took him up on his offer.  
  
"At any rate," Asmodeous continued, "You have gathered together today in contest for the ultimate prize." He held his hands apart. Between them, a swirling orb of pink energy shot through with motes of white light formed. Within seconds it took on a shape, eventually solidifying until it formed a golden scepter. It was nearly two feet tall, and ringed with a horde of jewels encrusting its entire length.  
  
Asmodeous bellowed, "Behold, the ultimate key to global conquest: The Scepter of Domination. He who wields it can control all of humanity. Bending their wills and making it their ow-"  
  
One of the other figures behind him cleared his throat in interruption.  
  
"What?" Asmodeous asked.  
  
"It's nae the Scepter oov Domination we be given oot today, yuir Eternal Irritant," it said.  
  
"It's not?"   
  
"Nae. It's the wee little ring that controls carses. The Scepter is the prize in next week's contest."  
  
"Oh." Asmodeous banished the scepter, and began rummaging through his pockets until he found a small band of unadorned gold. He held it up and announced to the crowd, "Behold the Ring Of Controlling Curses! With it in one's hands, you can control curses!"  
  
Everyone cheered at being shown the prize.  
  
Asmodeous said. "And all you need to participate in this contest for ultimate control over humanit... I mean control over curses, is the small, paltry sum of... your mortal souls! MUHAHAHAHA--"   
  
"Five hundred yen," another of the figures whispered.  
  
"What?" Asmodeous said irritably.  
  
The figure lisped, "The entry fee ith only five hundred yen! Not their mortal thoulth. Thatth in next weekth contetht your Eternal Thufferenthe."  
  
"So this is only a money raising gig?"  
  
"Yeth," the figure confirmed.   
  
"That would explain the lousy prize," Asmodeous said. To the crowd, he shouted, "Very well, the entry fee is only five hundred yen. MUHAHAH... bah. Sinister laughter isn't worth such a low fee. Cough it up and we'll start this thing."  
  
Each contestant paid their fees, and retook their positions at the starting line. Ranma continued to stretch and stay loose until he heard a voice chime out, "I'm here, Ranma."  
  
He turned only to see a sight that made his eyes bulge so wide they threatened to fall out of his head. Kachiko bounced her way over to him. Or perhaps it was more appropriate to say that certain parts of her anatomy bounced their way towards him. Even beneath the sweatshirt she now wore, it was obvious her chest has somehow expanded to unbelievable dimensions. Her front was practically going in a different direction from the rest of her body.  
  
"How?" Was all Ranma could get out at the inconceivable impossibility.   
  
It was more than Akane could manage, as she just stood and pointed.   
  
"Like the new modifications?" Kachiko posed for him, jiggling as much as if she was running.  
  
Nearby, Tarou shook his head in disapproval. "You were better off with what you had before. That's what, H-Cup size? It's just inhuman and disgusting."   
  
"Says the guy who turns into an oversized bull," Kachiko shot back, before bouncing her way to the judges' table and paying her entry fee.   
  
She made it back to the starting line just in time as Asmodeous stood up, pointed a hand to the sky, shouted, "Let the race... BEGIN!" and shot a glowing ball of blue energy straight up into the air. It exploded in a blossom of blue and green fire, accompanied by a tremendous boom.  
  
Tarou let off his trademark snicker as he stood idly by, watching the participants scramble like rats informed there was a piece of cheese at the end of a maze. The sad fools. Taking out Saotome early was just something to kill time, as well as putting things that much more in Tarou's favor. He had no fear of losing. All those chumps in the race could do was run. Tarou assured himself he was different as he pulled a gourd from his belt. While they were dealing with the obstacles, he would fly over them, outdistancing everyone and avoiding all those traps.   
  
He poured the water over his head and changed. Now in his cursed form, he bellowed loud and hard in triumph.   
  
While Tarou was in mid-bellow, something struck his face, exploding and dousing him in warm water that reverted him to his human form.  
  
"What?" Tarou spluttered, spitting out some of the water that he had swallowed.   
  
Kachiko stood there, water balloon in one hand and her chest now a full cup size smaller. "Nyah, it's not so easy when you can't change, is it?" Kachiko taunted, drawing back the hand with the balloon in it.  
  
Tarou played it off, wiping back his now wet locks. "You're quite the little cheap shot artist, aren't you? First there was the incident yesterday, now you set me up by faking a boob job and try to keep me from winning the race." He stepped menacingly forward. "Of course, all I need to do to take care of that problem is get the rest of that loaded chest of yours."  
  
A second balloon popped against his head, dousing him again. "Hey! I wasn't in my cursed form!" he snapped as he spat out more water.  
  
"I know, hitting you is fun," Kachiko said.  
  
Lunging forward before she could bring another balloon out, Tarou grabbed Kachiko, pinning her arms to her side in his powerful grip. "Your chest is mine!"  
  
A solid kick met the back of his head, forcing him to release his hold and teeter backward, and allowing Kachiko to move outside of his reach. It was of little consequence. He rubbed the back of his skull, Kachiko momentarily forgotten as a new, more dangerous, threat presented itself. "Oh, it's you, Fem-boy."  
  
Ranma stood back tensed and ready to unleash another attack. Voice full of anger, he said, "When I didn't see you in the running with the others, I figured you were up to something. But of all the slimy, rotten things you've pulled, threatening to molest Kachi is easily the lowest of the low. I'm really going to kick the crap out of you now."  
  
Tarou smirked. "I could say it's not what it sounded like, but I honestly don't give a damn what you think. Actually, you getting angry amuses me. So go ahead and assume I was trying to feel her up. Even if I was, you couldn't stop me."  
  
Tarou's lack of effort to deny what Ranma had seen fueled his anger. "You're going to pay for that." He moved forward to attack.  
  
"Not at your hands." Tarou shot back and moved forward as well.  
  
Just as the two were about to meet, a pair of hands darted around Tarou's waist. Deft fingers undid the buckle around the belt, extracting it and its payload of water filled gourds.   
  
Kachiko held her prize up in the air triumphantly. "I have them now. Hahaha... eh?"  
  
Kachiko looked in confusion at the results of her move. Ranma and Tarou had stopped moving forward. Apparently Tarou's trousers were baggier than Kachiko had thought, as, without the support from the belt, they had dropped to his ankles. Also Tarou evidently believed when one wore pants, underwear was optional.  
  
Ranma's pigtail stood out from the back of his head as he stared at Tarou.  
  
Casually, the older youth said to Ranma, "Look, Fem-Boy, just because I'm not wearing any underwear and am at... full extension, and while you can turn into a girl, don't get any idea that I'm attracted to you or anything. I just get kind of turned on by fights is all."  
  
"Ack!" Ranma covered his eyes.   
  
Tarou smirked. "Yeah, if I was you, I'd feel inferior to me, too." He turned to confront Kachiko, not the least bit embarrassed about his state of nudity. He placed his hands on his hips and smirked. "Since you wanted a look, here I am. Like what you see?"  
  
Another water balloon met his face.   
  
"Cool off, Bullsy. Some of us girls are interested in things other than well endowed guys with pantyhose fetishes." Kachiko retorted. She then raised the belt above her head, then   
brought it down hard, shattering all of the gourds and spilling their contents on the ground, allowing the soil to soak it up. She then tossed the belt back to Tarou.  
  
Tarou pulled up his pants, and refastened them. He stared at the course. "Looks like we do it the hard way. You'll see me at the finish line." Declaration made, Tarou ran off at top speed.  
  
Ranma peeked out through his fingers. Once he confirmed Tarou was no longer present, and pointing anything in his direction, he said, "That pervert wasn't ashamed or anything! It gives me the creeps."  
  
Kachiko headed in the same direction Tarou did. "Come on. We have to hurry if we're going to win that damn ring."  
  
Realizing she had raised a good point, and that there was no reason to stick around, Ranma did the same.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane was running as fast as she could, delighted at unexpectedly taking the lead. At least she thought she was in the lead. No one seemed to be following her. Of course, given the number of different paths that kept cropping up, all of them looking the same, it was small surprise she had lost track of the rest of the contestants. She just hoped Ranma was okay. Of course, he was stronger than her and would probably have an easier time through the course anyway, but maybe, just maybe, she'd choose the path with the fewest and easiest obstacles and win the race, showing that she should be taken seriously for a change.  
  
So far, the obstacles had been easy. Nothing more than a few pit traps, tripwires, and poppy fields full of drug-filled flowers-- making her grateful for Kodachi pulling the flower trick on her from time to time and recognizing them for what they were. They were all fairly common impediments, which were not slowing her down in the slightest.   
  
Eventually, Akane came to another split in the road. Curiously, there was a sign that said 'This Way' and indicated the path to the left.   
  
"Like anyone falls for that one," Akane said, and followed the trail to the right.  
  
She quickly came upon what appeared to be a bottomless chasm. Well technically it probably wasn't bottomless, but when one couldn't see the bottom, there was little difference between the two. Directly in front of her, spanning the chasm was a bridge. On her side was a man so ancient he made Happosai look young. He was stooped over, clutching a gnarled staff that was as wrinkled as his skin.   
  
In a raspy voice, he intoned. "Here lies the Bridge of Death, which spans the Really Deep Chasm. In order to cross it and get to the other side, ye must answer me these questions three, or else thy doom will be assured. Hehehe." He cackled insidiously.   
  
Akane asked, "You mean I'll be doomed if I unsuccessfully answer any of the questions, or is it I'll only be doomed if I don't answer all the questions correctly and try to cross the bridge?"  
  
"You'll only be doomed if you don't answer the questions right and try to cross the bridge. Actually getting the wrong answers doesn't intrinsically do anything to you. This isn't 'Jeopardy'," the man clarified.   
  
"What if I try to cross the bridge without listening to the questions?"  
  
"Wouldn't be much point asking the questions if you could just cross it, now is there?" the man said, put off by the very nature of the query.  
  
"What if I was to cross the bridge that's just fifteen meters that way?" Akane pointed to a sturdy wooden bridge that was located just a little farther down the length of the chasm.  
  
"Drat! She spotted it," the man hissed to himself. To Akane, he said. "Ah, you don't want to do that."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"It's ah, old, and dilapidated. Not sturdy at all," the man said.  
  
Akane persisted. "Will I be doomed if I cross it without answering any questions?"   
  
"Ah, well, who's to say?" the man said with a hint of menace in his voice.   
  
"I think I'll use that one." Akane moved in the direction of the second bridge.   
  
The old man said, "Wait! Don't do it! It's made of wood. You might get splinters. Very painful, splinters are. Mine is a nice and polished. No chance of splinters here."  
  
"Getting a few splinters is somewhat less risky than being doomed for answering a few questions wrong." Akane made to walk that way again.  
  
The man stepped in front of her. "But my questions are easy. Anyone can answer them. Go ahead and try it."  
  
"That's all right." Akane tried to move around the man.  
  
"Wait, wait, wait," the ancient one insisted. He went through a pocket on his robe, pulling out several coupons. "I'll throw these in too. They're for free sundaes at the local ice cream shop. Each one has a value of 200 yen. What do you say now?" He gave a winning smile.  
  
Akane moved around him and headed to the other bridge.   
  
"I'll make it only two questions," the man pleaded. "One of them will be where you were born. Come on. Please. No one ever crosses my bridge. I'm a lonely man." He fell to the ground in a pathetic, crying heap.  
  
Akane crossed the other bridge anyway. These obstacles were definitely proving easy to beat.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Tarou snickered, despite having no one around to appreciate his smugness. So far, the so-called 'obstacle course' had been simplicity itself to walk through. All he had to do was bitch slap a bunch of ninjas that had tried to sneak up on him, bitch slap a pack of wild apes that had tried to attack him, and bitch slap some mimes. Not that the pasty-faced weirdoes had stood in his way, just that he had seen them, and kicking the crap out of some was always fun. Smacking mimes around was addictive, like smoking, except without the dangers of nicotine. He was surprised more people didn't do it.  
  
Then he came upon something that put him on edge. A little ways up the path were two girls, identical twins that were about the age elementary students, dressed in equally identical school uniforms. They stood just off the path directly across from one another. Between the two of them were a pair of jump ropes that they were twirling; a curiosity since no one was using them to jump.  
  
Tarou moved closer until he stood before the skipping strands of rope. He looked to the girls. "This is supposed to be the next obstacle?" he said incredulously.  
  
"Yes, sir," the pair said as one.  
  
"I'm Rei," the one on the right said in a singsong voice.  
  
"I'm Mei," the other said in the same way as the first.  
  
Tarou's eyes nearly rolled into the back of his head. "This is the lamest obstacle I have ever seen." Humoring the two girls, he leaped between the ropes.  
  
He believed he had their timing down perfectly, and by all rights it should have been a simple matter to give two tiny hops and end up on the other side. Instead, he saw only one of the ropes skip under his feet. The second one wrapped itself around his ankle, and he found himself hurled powerfully back the way he came, skidding across the ground on his chest until he came to a stop.  
  
Two girlish giggles reached his ears, turning Tarou's face red. He picked himself off the ground and dusted off his shirt. It was a fluke, that was all. A one time error in his coordination. He would get through it easily. It was just a couple of jump ropes.  
  
Watching closely until he thought he had the timing down again, Tarou jumped in-between the ropes. Once more, he only managed to leap over one, the other entwining itself around his ankle and throwing him back just as hard as before  
  
His eyebrows twitched furiously as he again raised himself up off the ground.   
  
Mei (or was it Rei, he wasn't certain) said, "In all the time we've been stationed here, no one has ever gotten past our spinning Ropes of Repulsion. Just do like all the others did, and backtrack until you get to a split in the path and take another fork."  
  
Tarou snickered. "Ah, but you see. I'm not like all those other narrow-minded idiots. I don't think linearly." And with that Tarou leaped high in the air, at least ten feet above the two girls.   
  
Just as he reached a point directly over the ropes, one snaked out and somehow grabbed at his ankle, snaring it. Tarou found himself hurled so hard to the ground that he bounced once before coming to a stop.  
  
"The last fork is no more than two hundred meters the other way," one of the girls said.  
  
Much more slowly this time, Tarou rose to his feet. He didn't bother brushing himself off as he slowly walked back to the spinning ropes.   
  
"You're not going to make it though," Mei warned.   
  
"He's more stubborn than most," her sister agreed.   
  
Tarou's eyes followed the spinning ropes again. His nodded up and down in accordance with the pieces of rope. At last, he gave a satisfied grin.  
  
Mei looked at Rei and shook her head sadly.  
  
Tarou's hand lashed out, grabbing Mei by her collar. He leaned the other way, then grabbed Rei as well.   
  
Holding the pair well off the ground, he snarled. "Knock off the rope spinning and let me pass."  
  
"You won't beat us up," Mei said defiantly.  
  
"Why not?" Tarou asked, as though he was being subjected to the world's most stupid question.   
  
"Because most people would regard pummeling harmless little girls as being morally corrupt," Rei offered.  
  
Eyebrow raised curiously, Tarou asked, "Do I look like most people?"  
  
Mei and Rei laughed nervously. They also released their holds on their ropes.   
  
"Go on past," Mei said, ushering him past.  
  
Tarou placed them back on the ground and patted their heads. He then walked over the ropes and continued down the path.   
  
Rei looked at Mei. "I don't care how many Girl Scout Cookies Lord Asmodeous promised to buy off us, I'm getting a new job."  
  
Mei nodded her head in agreement.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma found himself confronted by an unexpected obstacle in the middle of the pathway; actually the first to be labeled such. Simple things, like climbing ladders covered in grease and jumping through a hopscotch set up didn't really count as 'obstacles' in his mind. But this one was different. Before him was a huge man, towering three meters tall, and adorned in bright, golden, metal armor emblazoned with rams so lifelike they practically threatened to jump off the armor and charge. It had to have been crafted by a true artisan. The man within the armor was a sight to behold as well. Not only tall, but incredibly wide and with tree trunk like arms and legs that appeared they could shatter rock as if it was paper mache. A giant sword hung across his back, the weapon as long as Ranma and weighing perhaps twice as much. It was quite the imposing sight. The man's face indicated he was in his late twenties at the outside. He stared disdainfully at Ranma.  
  
"None shall pass," the warrior promised.  
  
"We'll see about that," Ranma said, tensing up for a fight.  
  
The warrior said, "By the Code of Kachoo, you are given the right of three free blows, before I shall strike you down. That is three, and not one more, nor one less. Just three. A trio of blows, like triplets born of a mother. Not two, like twins. Not quartets, like in a barbershop-"  
  
"I get the idea. Only three," Ranma said. "It's only going to take one, though. I'll make it quick and relatively painless."  
  
Ranma launched himself, aiming a kick right at the man's chest directly at the image of the ram above his stomach. The man did not even move as Ranma's attack headed right on target.   
  
"Argh!" Ranma shouted as he bounced off the armor. It had been like hitting stone. The warrior hadn't even had the courtesy to flinch.  
  
The warrior said, "That counted as your first attack. Not the second. Not the third. But the first. A single number, like one, which is indeed the loneliest number that you shall ever-"  
  
"I know, I know!" Ranma snapped. This guy was no pushover, but it didn't really matter. Ranma Saotome was unbeatable when it came down to it, and with three free blows, he could take anyone down.  
  
Ranma smirked, drawing on his supreme confidence and formed a bright ball of blue energy between his hands. He let the ball build up until it was a what he regarded as a sufficient size, and cried out, "Moko Takabisha!" and released it at his opponent.  
  
The blue beam spattered harmlessly against the armor. Again the warrior failed to react to the blast.  
  
"That was two-"  
  
"Don't start that again!" Ranma said, annoyed that this was going to take a while. It wasn't that he was fearful of losing, just that this was a race where every second counted. He had to stop Tarou from getting to the finish line, since there was no way Akane or Kachi could stop the jerk. It was all up to Ranma.  
  
The giant warrior unlimbered his giant sword. It gleamed wickedly under the sun.   
  
"Hey, you said I get three free shots. I've only taken two," Ranma insisted.  
  
The warrior said, "Indeed. I am merely preparing myself for after the last free blow falls. Once you have unleashed it, I shall strike you down with one mighty blow from my blade. Like the giant lumberjack of lore, I shall smite you as if I was he, my sword was an axe, and you were a tree. I would-"  
  
"I got it! I got it!" Ranma snapped. He calmed himself down. One last attack, and then the fight would truly begin against....  
  
"What's your name?" Ranma asked.  
  
The warrior puffed out his chest. "I am the greatest Knight of the Realm of Jothenhiem. The Rose of Sancrest. The Kingfisher of Argoth. The Assembler of Linux-"  
  
"What do your friends call you?" Ranma said slowly, pronouncing each word through clenched teeth.  
  
"My friends call me... Glazz Jaw."  
  
"Glazz... Jaw?" Ranma said slowly. "Any reason for that?"  
  
"Indeed," the man said. "It was something of a joke. You see. I inherited a hereditary condition from my father. He-"  
  
Ranma's fist met the man's chin.  
  
Glazz Jaw said, "Yes, that would be it." His eyes rolled into the back of his head and he collapsed to the ground.  
  
Ranma sighed to himself and hurried onward. What a waste of time.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko Tendou stared at the sight before her. So far this obstacle course had been far from difficult. Wacky Wakaba's morning greetings were usually more lively than what she had encountered so far. Nothing really inspired, just rope ladders over pits of poisonous snakes, walking across broken glass, and leaping through flaming hoops. All easy stuff.  
  
However, this latest obstacle was something else. Here she was, confronted by a large, what appeared to be, playing board of some type directly in the middle of the path. Its edges were flush with the hillsides, forming a barrier that prevented anyone from leaving the path. The only way to go forward was to cross the board and continue on.  
  
Kachiko was not the only one present. A girl around her age was reading some sort of sign located next to the board. Kachiko asked, "What are you reading?"  
  
The girl turned to give her the evil eye. "I am in the process of figuring out the answers to the equations necessary to safely cross the board, idiot."  
  
"No need to get rude," Kachiko snapped back, then looked at the sign. It said something about figuring out the equations on it in order to step on the correct squares in the proper order to traverse the board. Kachiko saw that the sign was overflowing with a variety of numbers, letters, and symbols represented sets of equations. She scratched her head in confusion.  
  
The girl that was poring over the equations noticed Kachiko was staring at them intently. She laughed. "Don't be ridiculous. Any obstacle that can give I, Amiko Mikohara, the Queen of the Obstacle Course, pause, means you can never hope to pass it."  
  
Kachiko took a step back in shock. "How dare you refer to yourself as the Queen of the Obstacle Course. I'll have you know I am the true queen."  
  
Amiko appeared equally offended. "Don't be ludicrous. I have completed over five hundred obstacle courses in my time. From the great Splasherfest Course in Yokohama, to the International Volcano Obstacle Course Challenge in Ghana, I have won them all. They don't call me the Undefeated One for nothing."  
  
"They'll be calling you Loser Girl after I'm through with you," Kachiko bragged.  
  
Amiko was openly angered by the statement. "If you think you're so hot, cross the board."  
  
"A piece of cake." Kachiko walked to the board and stepped on one of the black squares furthest to the left edge of the board. Smirking, she then leaped to the other side, advancing one square. She covered her eyes, hopped on one foot to a square five over and two ahead. Next she did a handstand to the one diagonal from her. She then pretended as though she was drunk, staggered across four different squares, before making a dramatic sweeping gesture, and stepping off a final square and off the board, now on the opposite side.  
  
Amiko's jaw nearly dislocated itself with how far it swung open. She pointed at Kachiko and babbled, "How?"  
  
Kachiko smirked. "It's simple, if you've not a total loser idiot like yourself."  
  
Amiko pointed at one of the equations on the board. "But how did you get this one with the variable integer that's dependent on the time of day."  
  
"I took the wind variable into consideration."  
  
"What?"  
  
"It's something your puny mind couldn't understand," Kachiko said quickly.  
  
Amiko asked, "And this one which multiplies zero several times, but still comes up with a positive number?"  
  
"Yes, well, I just applied the Ornstead Theorem to it." Kachiko answered.  
  
Amiko stared at her suspiciously. "You just randomly chose squares, didn't you?"  
  
Kachiko broke out into a light sweat. Her posturing broke down as she said, "Fine! I did. So what? I just figured I could deal with any problems that popped up if I hit the wrong square. It's just a game board. What's it going to do? King me?"  
  
Amiko gave Kachiko a flat stare, picked up a rock, and tossed it on one of the squares. Instantly flames erupted, liquefying the rock in seconds. Amiko repeated the action, tossing a second rock on a different square. It was frozen solid in a second. A third time, and the rock disappeared in a pop.  
  
"I knew it could do that," Kachiko said.  
  
"Liar, you got lucky!" Amiko shot back.   
  
Kachiko turned her back to Amiko, bent over, and smacked her bottom. "Right here, Loser Girl." She then stood up properly and announced. "I'm out of here. See you later," and took off.  
  
Kachiko hummed pleasantly to herself, enjoying her superiority. She was barely out of sight of the board when the world went spinning as a sudden pain shot through the very center of her being. It was unlike anything she had felt, ever, a piercing thing that seemed to erupt from every portion of her body. She cried out and doubled over in agony, curling into a fetal ball and praying that the pain would go away. For a moment, the pain lessened, but the decreasing pain was accompanied by a feeling of weightlessness, and a lack of sensation from her surroundings.  
  
Then, as suddenly as it started, it was over. Everything felt like it was there again, and the pain drifted away, almost as though it had never been. Kachiko stood up, making a critical examination of her herself in an attempt to discover what had caused such agony. She could see no wounds, nor any indication of what had triggered such an experience in the first place. There was nothing at all wrong with her. Not even a lingering sensation of pain.  
  
"Maybe I didn't hit all the right squares after all," she admitted to herself. With time wasting, and no indication of a second attack coming, Kachiko went on ahead in search of the next obstacle, quickly putting the incident behind her.  
  
Within minutes she came upon it; a wide pool of tar that was set in the middle of the path she had been traveling. There was a way across, of course, but it was something on the unusual side; a single taut rope strung across from one side to the other. It was easy enough to navigate if one could handle walking across tightropes. What was especially curious was that there was a man on the far side, with a pair of shears in hand. He sat next to the rope, the shears open and the rope lying in-between the sharpened pieces of metal.  
  
Kachiko smirked at the sight. "Heh. Pretty clever, but I can see right through it. The people who came up with the obstacle course would never provide such an obvious way to get across, while leaving such an obvious means of preventing people from crossing it.   
This is one of those, 'It looks like the trap is simple and impossible to pass, but it really isn't.' It's meant to make me try to come up with some complicated alternate route, when in fact I can walk right across this rope and nothing is going to happen. That might sucker chumps like Loser Girl, but I've seen it done before. No need to confirm it."   
  
"Then I won't," the man standing on the other side said.  
  
Without a moment's hesitation, Kachiko stepped onto the rope and began to walk across it as casually as if she was walking down the street. She even whistled and made a big production as she casually strolled over the tar pits and towards the other side.   
  
Halfway across, the man closed the shears, severing the rope and sending the stunned Kachiko into the tar.   
  
As Kachiko began sinking into the tar, she heard the man say, "My favorites are the dumb ones that think they're incredibly brilliant when the only people they can outsmart are themselves. God, I love my job."  
  
And then Kachiko was completely submerged.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma emerged from a tunnel filled with what were supposed to be terrifying ghosts. Having more than enough dealings with such otherworldly beings, from the inane Cat Ghost to that silly Cave of Lost Love to being possessed by spirits, they were nothing more than a casual annoyance.   
  
Once out in the open, he looked over the area. Much to his delight, he could just make out the finish line beyond the next obstacle, which consisted of a number of pools dotting the ground. A small island of rock was in the middle of each of the tiny bodies of water, with giant bamboo... poles... sticking... out?  
  
Ranma looked at the nearby sign proclaiming the nature of the obstacle before him. "Welcome to the Cursed Drowned Pools Obstacle Course (TM Owned by Jusenkyou Guide Inc.). Enjoy your stay."  
  
"Oh, no," Ranma moaned. This was the last place on earth he wanted to end up. All he needed was to get some other curse and end up a freak like Tarou. Still, things shouldn't be too bad. All he needed to do was leap across the pools and get to the other side. He had obviously arrived here first, and since the rope was still unbroken across the finish line, no one else had finished yet. He still had time to win.  
  
As he jumped to the nearest bamboo pole, a figure emerged from a different path, and instantly examined its surroundings. Ranma stopped in his leaping to see who his competition to the finish line would be.   
  
Tarou was up on a pole in an instant. "Want to do this the easy way, Fem-boy, and have you stand here and wait for second place?"  
  
Ranma gave him a cocky grin. "You'll be the one eating my dust, Pantyhose."  
  
"Well, if you want to end up with a month's supply of pain in addition to your rice, bring it on," Tarou made a curling motion with his finger.  
  
Ranma accepted the offer and immediately launched himself at Tarou. The older boy fended off the two punch combination, but was unable to launch a counter strike due to the speed of the attack and his need to maintain his balance on top of the pole.  
  
Landing on top of a different piece of bamboo, Ranma gave an identical curling motion with his finger to Tarou.   
  
Unable to resist the lure, Tarou leaped toward Ranma's pole. Rather than remaining there for the attack, Ranma waited until Tarou was three quarters of the way across and kicked off from the pole he was on. The unexpected attack caught Tarou off-guard, and he was unable to react in time. A kick landed solidly in his gut. The force of the blow sent him flying on a different course towards the ground. Luckily his flight path took him within arm's reach of a different pole. He kept himself from falling by clutching the bamboo as though his life depended on it.  
  
Safely on top of his own perch, Ranma taunted Pantyhose as he climbed to the top of the shaft he had snared. "Looks like some big mouth doesn't have what it takes beat a poor old 'Fem Boy'. Isn't that a shame?"  
  
Tarou snarled a curse and hurled himself at Ranma again. This time Ranma retaliated immediately and the pair exchanged a number of blows in mid-air. Ranma managed to get one last one in as they retreated, hitting Tarou in the jaw. It was a light tap, not so much doing damage as proving Ranma's superiority in aerial combat.   
  
Now firmly enraged, Tarou paused a moment before giving out a loud battle cry. He crouched slightly, and Ranma tensed up for the next attack. He was so prepared for an assault that he failed to react for a second when, rather than hurling himself at Ranma, Tarou leapt to another pole. Rather than jumping to the top of it, Tarou leapt to another pole, grabbing on to the middle again. Confused, Ranma continued standing there, watching Tarou leap again to another middle section of a pole. It was then Ranma realized something very important in the selection of poles Tarou was using.   
  
They led directly to the finish line.  
  
"Coward!" Ranma shouted, and hurried to catch up. Luckily, the way Tarou was leaping from the middle of the poles was not anywhere near as quick as jumping along the tops of them.  
  
Ranma leaped on a set of poles along a parallel course to Tarou. He had almost caught up to his foe when he jumped to the shaft Tarou had occupied a moment before. Just as Ranma's weight settled on the top, the bamboo let out a tiny cracking noise, and the whole thing broke right where Tarou had previously landed. Caught off-guard, Ranma found there was nothing he could do to prevent himself from falling downward and into the pool below him.  
  
Tarou laughed at Ranma's falling form. "You always were a sucker, Fem Boy."  
  
"Nooo!" Ranma wailed, catching sight of a sign that said 'Pool of Drowned Panda.' "Anything but the one my stupid old man fell in!" His pleas went unheard as he hit the pool with a resounding splash.  
  
Tarou climbed to the top of his current pole and laughed at the sight. "Hahahaha! I look cool with my Yeti-Riding-Bull-While-Carrying-Crane-And-Eel-And-Octopus curse, but you look just plain stupid as a girl and... nothing but a girl?"  
  
Ranma-chan sat up and looked at herself. Curiously, she wasn't a female panda, or a cross between a female and a panda. She was just a girl. She looked at the sign again, which said in bold black letters: Pool of Drowned Panda.  
  
"I don't get it," Ranma-chan said. Then she heard a disturbance coming from the water behind her. She turned to see emerging from the pool, one very large and very wet panda. It plodded out of the pool, stood on the ground, shook its fur, flinging water everywhere, then turned to walk away on all fours.  
  
Ranma-chan looked again at the sign. "It looks like someone didn't quite understand the nature of what a 'Pool of Drowned Panda' was supposed to do."  
  
Tarou pointed and laughed at Ranma-chan. "It doesn't matter. It was worth it just to see the look of sheer terror on your face as you were falling and thought you were going to get a stupid panda curse. Hahaha-"   
  
The laughter was cut short as Ranma-chan launched herself from the pool and shattered the pole beneath her opponent's perch. She taunted, "Let's see how you like getting all wet!"  
  
As the pole slowly began to fall, Tarou called out in an overly dramatic voice, "Oh no, I'm about to fall in a pool of water that is going to activate my curse. Whatever shall I do?"  
  
It was then the repercussions of Ranma-chan's actions hit her. Tarou was bad enough without the curse, but with it....  
  
Ranma-chan sprang off the pole she was on and launched herself at Tarou. He took a swing, which she managed to duck, and kicked him away from the water so that he would fall on one of the strips of earth between the pools rather than in one.  
  
The mid-air blow left Ranma-chan with no recourse but to fall into the water Tarou had almost ended up in. It didn't matter to her, knowing the nature of the stupid pools now. She held her breath as she went under, waiting for her momentum to die so she could swim back up. Her strokes were powerful, and she broke the surface. But as she did she felt something small and wet attach itself to her face, covering it completely. Now able to breathe again, she spluttered, "What?"   
  
The creature let out a gruesome yowl. It was then Ranma-chan grasped the true horror of her predicament, and came to understand that there was nothing more terrifying than having a wet, irate cat attached to her face.  
  
"AHHH" she competed screeching with the cat's cries and began running blindly around, crashing into pools and poles alike, like a bumper car left to run at full speed in a narrow passage.  
  
Tarou made his way to the top of one of the poles so he could have a good view of Ranma's terrified antics. "This is great!" he said, nearly doubling over in laughter.  
  
Something glomped onto him from behind, nearly knocking him from his perch. Tarou was forced to use every ounce of equilibrium he had to keep from going over and directly into the ground.  
  
"How are you doing, Bullsy?"   
  
Tarou recognized the voice, "Ah, it's you again, you shifty little wench. Get off my back."  
  
Kachiko said, "Actually, I couldn't do it, even if I wanted to."  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"Ever hear the one about Brer Rabbit and the Tar Baby?"  
  
Tarou sniffed the air, crinkled his nose, then looked over his shoulder at the girl so firmly attached to him. There was a black substance smudged on her face, and he could see quantities of it on the arms that encircled his torso. "You idiot! If you're attached to me, you can't win either."  
  
"I don't need to win." Unable to remove her arms, Kachiko shook her head behind them, indicating he should look in that direction.  
  
Tarou turned to see Akane Tendou had also emerged into the final obstacle course.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane looked at the scene before her. Ranma-chan was running around with a cat attached to her face, and Kachiko was stuck to Tarou. With Ranma-chan in panic mode (and Akane unable to help her fiancé in 'his' panicked state,) and her mother effectively negating the only competition around, as well as herself, in the process, that left Akane to win the race.   
  
"Hurry!" Kachiko cried as Tarou leapt to another pole, barely able to hold on with Kachiko struggling on his back.   
  
Akane hurried along the ground, which was tricky considering how thin some of the pathways were. But she felt it was safer to trust her feet on the ground rather than her leaping ability. Quickly, she emerged from the forest of bamboo a good fifteen seconds ahead of Tarou, who was desperately trying to peel the girl from his back. Akane noted he had made some progress, despite Kachiko's attempts to remain clinging to him. He had freed one of her arms from his front and was trying to pry the rest of her from his back. It was a nearly impossible task given his lack of sufficient leverage, but somehow he was succeeding.   
  
"Hurry!" Kachiko repeated, her voice all but acknowledging she was losing the battle.   
  
Akane turned and prepared to sprint to the finish line. It would take her no more than half a minute. Even if Tarou was free, with the lead she had, there was no way she could lose. Finally, she was going to prove to everyone that she was a serious martial artist and win the race. Ranma would finally be free of his curse, and he would actually thank her for it. Not that she would try to force him into thanking her or asking for anything in return, but she knew Ranma well enough to understand that he would be grateful. With how strained things had been lately, his appreciation would be like a breath of fresh air. Also having control over his curse would take away that problem, and then he could move on to the other one of Kachiko's unwanted attentions and openly admitting Akane was his one and only fiancee.  
  
Akane ran, her pathway to happiness in sight. She could hear her mother shouting words of encouragement and Tarou cursing her. Akane felt her heart nearly leap into her throat. It was all real. Nothing could stop her now. She was finally going to win one.  
  
And then a louder caterwauling reached her ears, one that was all too familiar. Akane paused, turning to see that offending cat had remained attached to Ranma-chan's face too long and the girl had slipped into full nekoken mode. Ranma-chan finally stopped running, and swatted the cat off her face before heading out of sight, as far away from the cat as she could. As to the poor feline, it gave one loud yelp as it went flying through the air, only to hit a pool, kicking up an impressive gout of water. A second later a sparrow emerged from the pool and flew off, but the cat wasn't anywhere to be seen.   
  
Akane stopped. It was still alive, she had heard it cry out even after Ranma-chan batted it away, but hitting the water must have stunned it. If it wasn't pulled out right away, it would drown. It was a good distance away, thanks to Ranma's blow, and every second would count in rescuing the poor creature whose only crime had been being in the wrong place at the wrong time.  
  
But the finish line wasn't that far away. She could be the hero for a change instead of Ranma, and he would be so grateful to her.  
  
But the cat could die.  
  
"I'm sorry," Akane said out loud.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"What are you doing?!" Kachiko screeched as Akane turned around and headed the other way.   
  
"Geez, talk about not having your priorities straight. She really is soft-hearted, isn't she?" Tarou said as he continued pushing Kachiko away.   
  
Finally maneuvering the girl far enough off his back he could put his arm between her front and his back, Tarou managed to use enough leverage to bring his full strength to bear. There was the sound of ripping garments as Kachiko fell away from him with an audible thud. The sudden lack of resistance was so great that Tarou fell backward as well, hitting the ground solidly.  
  
He had just returned to his feet when Kachiko latched onto him again, this time attaching herself to his front. Unlike before, with the lack of tar and proper leverage, he easily pried her off.  
  
"Nice tits," he said as he held the struggling girl at arms' length.  
  
"What?" Kachiko looked down and discovered that it was both her shirt and bra, not Tarou's clothing, that had torn, when the youth had pulled her off his back.   
  
"Ack!" she cried out, ceasing in her efforts to cling to him, and covering her chest.  
  
Tarou used the opening to turn tail and run straight for the finish line. Kachiko tried to catch up, but stopped halfway when she realized that between his longer stride and her effort to cover herself there was no way she could prevent Tarou from winning. Instead, she turned, tying the remnants of her shirt into a makeshift top that barely hid her breasts, and stalked in the opposite direction.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane looked with relief at the cat that lay in her lap, spitting up water and breathing. She placed it on the ground where it continued hacking, as though the monster of all hairballs had become lodged in its throat.   
  
As Akane rose to her feet, she saw that her mother had approached and was now standing next to her, glaring at Akane with a murderous gleam in her eyes.   
  
Akane looked at the ground in shame. "I'm sorry, I guess I screwed up."  
  
A resounding slap met Akane's cheek, turning her head slightly. Akane didn't try to move it back to its proper place, instead she remained as still as a statue in shock from the unexpected gesture.  
  
Not satisfied with the blow, Kachiko unleashed a verbal barrage, "What the !#$% do you think you were doing, you idiot?! You could have won! The finish line was right there!"  
  
Akane held her face, trying to explain, "But the cat was drowning."  
  
"So what?!" Kachiko screeched. "It's just a cat! Just some strange !#$% cat no different from the thousands they put to sleep every year! You can't even keep it because Ranma's terrified of them! Do you think you're great and wonderful because you saved it?! There are millions of cats out there, but only one ring. Which do you think is more important?""  
  
Memories of a little girl being yelled at by her mother tickled Akane's subconscious. Rather than trying to shout back or defend herself, tears began to well in her eyes. she tried saying, "But I thought-"  
  
"You thought what?" Kachiko raged. "That if you had good intentions and pure motives everything would turn out all right? Here's a little piece of advice, from mother to daughter. That's a bunch of !#$%! Look around you." She pointed to where Tarou was now standing in victory, congratulating himself. "What do you know, we lost. That asshole won the race! The ring is his, not Ranma's! Now an exceedingly dangerous person has even more power than before, and Ranma's just as screwed over as before.  
  
"Don't delude yourself into thinking you won anything by taking some imaginary high moral ground. Thanks to you, Ranma's going to be paying for your 'benevolence,' for a long time afterward. But hey, what does it really matter in the big scheme of things? At least you saved the cat." Kachiko gave Akane a disgusted look as she turned away in anger and headed toward the finish line.  
  
All Akane could do was look down at the ground, and try to hide the tears that rolled down her face.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Impetuous fools! I am the Lord of The Everrealm. Master of all I survey! Emperor of my dimension, and you have the audacity to deliver me such grievous news?!"  
  
"Thorry, your motht Unworthy, but there are no more thin minths. How about a thortbread cookie?"  
  
"No, I don't like shortbread. Give me a Samoa."   
  
"Hey, where's my prize?!" Tarou said to the quintet of figures that were huddled over a number of cookie filled boxes.  
  
Asmodeous turned to look at him. "Won the race, did you?"  
  
"Yes," Tarou said, vaguely disturbed as Asmodeous consumed a cookie by placing it against his faceplate where a mouth should be and watching the Samoa simply disappear into the plate.  
  
Asmodeous placed his hands slightly apart and summoned a glowing ball of light. "Very well, the Scepter of Domination is yours."  
  
"The Ring of Controlling Curses, sir," one of the hooded figures said.  
  
"Oh, right." Asmodeous dispelled the ball and rummaged through his pockets until he came up with the ring. "Here you go." He offered the item to Tarou.  
  
Tarou raised his hand to grab the item, but somehow Kachiko inserted herself between him and the ring, snatching it out of Asmodeous' hand.   
  
Asmodeous said to her, "I'm sorry. There seems to be some confusion. That's first prize. You came in second. I believe your prize is a slap to the face."  
  
"Nae, it's a moonth's supply o' Rice O'Roni," one of the shrouded figures corrected.   
  
"Hand it over," Tarou said menacingly, holding out his hand expectedly.  
  
Kachiko placed the ring in the palm of her hand, raised a glowing fist above it, then brought the fist down directly upon the ring, breaking it in half. "Here you go," she placed the pieces in his open hand.  
  
For a moment, Tarou didn't respond. He just stood there, open mouthed in disbelief. Then his fist curled about the fragments, trembling with how powerfully he gripped them. He closed his eyes, eyebrows twitching fiercely. "You trick me and give me a sucker punch to the balls. You outmaneuver me and keep me from transforming. You attach yourself to me like an oversized leach in an effort to prevent me from winning, and when all your efforts failed anyway in the end, you destroy the prize rather than letting me win it." He moved toward her, bringing his full height to bear. "You're a sneaky, manipulative, ruthless little cheap shot artist that'll do anything to come out on top in the end."  
  
"So what are you going to do about it?" Kachiko said, bringing her fists up and prepared to defend herself.  
  
Rather than speaking any further, Tarou rushed forward. Kachiko tried to strike him, but he deflected both her attacks. He then grabbed her by the face, brought it forward, and kissed her full on the lips.  
  
Breaking off the kiss, Tarou said, "God, you seriously turn me on."  
  
Kachiko just stood there, twitching and making strangling noises as she turned green.   
  
Tarou snickered in satisfaction, wiping his mouth off. "Yeah, I won't deny I've had problems finding a girl I was seriously interested in, but you're someone I could actually respect."  
  
That snapped Kachiko out of her stupor. "Don't be ridiculous! I could never stomach someone like you! You're a maniacal, egotistical, ruthless asshole who's so convinced he's the greatest thing around nothing could possibly break through your delusions of adequacy!"  
  
"I know you're hot for me too, babe."  
  
"I find you utterly repulsive!" Kachiko shrieked jumping up and down like a little child on a sugar high being told she can't have any more candy.   
  
Tarou shook his head. "Every time we meet, one of us ends up flashing our goods to the other."  
  
"All unfortunate coincidences!" Kachiko insisted.   
  
"Go ahead and deny it, I can tell you're attracted to me by how aroused you are," Tarou countered.   
  
"I'm irate, not aroused, you moron!" Remembering something Ranma had told her about Tarou's previous problems with girls, Kachiko shouted, "Pantyhose, Pantyhose, Pantyhose, Pantyhose, Pantyhose!"  
  
Tarou said blissfully, "From other women, my name sounds like fingernails across a chalkboard. From you, it sounds like the sweet call of birds chirping in the spring air." He sighed.  
  
Kachiko appeared as though she was about to cry. "I'd rather have you try to beat me up than date me. I did destroy the ring you were after," she mentioned hopefully. "Don't you want to kick my ass for destroying your one chance of controlling your curse?"  
  
Tarou shook his head. "Nah. It was something that would have made things more convenient is all. Finding true love is a much greater prize."  
  
Kachiko was seething. "I'd sooner marry that dirty old man that keeps coming onto me and birth three little anklebiters like everyone wants me to than ever consent to dating you!"  
  
Tarou waved his hand dismissively. "You're a little wild. That's cool. I wouldn't want our courtship to be too easy. I'm going to have fun taming your shrew. I'll give you a little time to adjust to the fact you're going to be my woman. See you around." Tarou snickered and walked off, stride showing nothing but extreme confidence.  
  
Unable to think of anything that would drive him off, or make him want to kill her, Kachiko fell to her knees and began to cry. It was beginning to look like throwing herself in front of a truck would be a good thing. At the very least it would be less painful than having to deal with a total creep like Pantyhose Tarou as a suitor.  
  
"Why does everything have to happen to me?" she wailed.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
[END NOTES]  
Yes, Kachiko coming down on Akane was exceptionally harsh, wasn't it? You'll glean a little bit of the reasons for her almost irrational ire in the interlude that's coming up next.  
  
Yes, those really were lyrics to a real song. "I Must Increase My Bust' by the Lords of Acid.  
  
And yes, Monty Python and the Holy Grail inspired more than a few of the 'obstacles'.  
  
Next time out we get a little interlude that will hopefully explain a few things.  
  
Special thanks to:  
The Apprentice  
Max M.  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
Michael A. Chase 


	10. Things We Wish For Interlude 1

The Things We Wish For...  
Interlude 1  
Faerie Tale Endings  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
  
  
Or R+C books at:  
  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident and is with them in the present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
Writer's note: A word of warning in advance, it's a flashback featuring Kachiko, so she's the only character mentioned throughout all but the start and end. Soun is going to have an interlude devoted to him later. So for those who correctly say that this series deals a lot from Kachi's perspective, please bear with it, since this is a necessary thing.  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Come on, Akane. Tell me what's wrong," Ranma said to the closed door, in a voice that was not quite pleading, largely in part because he never pleaded.   
  
"No! Just leave me alone," was the only response.  
  
"I can tell something's bothering you." Ranma stared at the plaque hanging on the door, the one bearing Akane's name. She had been avoiding him for the last few days, ever since the race. Most of the time she stayed in her old room. The only time she vacated it was during the night, when Kachiko slept there and she would retreat to Kasumi's room. Ranma had tried hitting Kasumi up for any hints as to what he had done wrong, but Akane had remained close-mouthed with her as well. Her reticence was going from mildly irritating to annoying.  
  
Behind the door, Akane's voice emerged louder than before. "Mom was right! I screwed up! I could have won the race, but I was stupid. Now leave me alone!"   
  
At last, he finally knew the truth. Whatever Akane thought she messed up was seriously being blown out of proportion. He was the one that wanted the item, and by the day after the race, he had written off the loss and carried on as though nothing had happened. "Ah, don't worry about it. The thing probably wouldn't have worked anyway." Those sorts of cures never did.  
  
"That's not the point. I should have won the race. I should have gotten it even if it didn't work."  
  
Ranma rolled his eyes. "I was the one who didn't win, and it was only because of bad luck. You're being too hard on yourself. It's not like I'm angry with you. I wasn't counting on you winning it or anything. I mean, you probably had the worst odds of anyone in the race to win, so it would have been pretty stupid if was depending on you."  
  
The sound of movement came from within the room. Ranma impressed himself with the ease with which he had soothed her wounded pride. He put on his most charming smile and waited for the door to open.  
  
Instead a thrown barbell shattered the door, as though it was made of paper. It struck Ranma squarely in the face before bouncing off and hitting the floor, rolling to a stop a few feet away. A stunned Ranma followed a moment later.  
  
Shaking his head clear of the cobwebs, Ranma began crawling low to the floor, presenting as small a target profile as he could manage, and made his way down the hall. "Definitely moodier than usual," he mumbled to himself. He'd give her a couple more days to cool off before trying to make her feel better again.  
  
Once he was at the top of the landing, (and well out of Akane's line of fire), he stood up and made his way downstairs. There was another side of the equation. Kachiko had also been subdued since the race, and doing her best to avoid everyone as well. In the beginning, the lack of attention she usually showered him with was reassuring. Then the idea that the reason for that might have been her spending time with Kunou occurred. That would have changed everything. Being left to his own devices was one thing, being ignored in favor of someone else's attention was something else. So Ranma spent part of the day following her once, but all she had done was shop at one of the local malls alone. After shopping, he continued following her until he ran into Ukyou. There was no way to avoid her, so they talked for a few minutes. By the time Ukyou had left, Kachiko's trail had gone cold. Since there had been no obvious disturbances (and Kunou tended to cause those wherever he went), Ranma felt assured that Kachiko had been up to something else, and decided to turn his attention back to Akane and discover what was troubling her.  
  
The more Ranma thought about the situation, the more he realized he needed additional information. The best avenue seemed to be confronting Kachiko directly. Knowing she had left the Tendou home out before he had woken up, and still had not returned, Ranma decided to find Kasumi and see if she knew her mother's whereabouts.  
  
Ranma poked his head into the kitchen and found Kasumi. She sat at the table poring over a book with the title 'Abductions Made Easy'.  
  
Kasumi noticed Ranma's presence. She placed the book down and asked him, "You wouldn't happen to know anyone who might be interested in kidnapping Mother? Preferably someone Father could defeat."  
  
"Ah, no," Ranma said slowly.   
  
"What if Mother was drugged beforehand?" Kasumi asked hopefully.  
  
"Not really." Ranma began to wonder if it might not be best to leave Kasumi to her own devices and not bother her further. She did have her own life to lead, and he shouldn't interfere with it.   
  
Kasumi pouted slightly. "I'll have to think of something else."  
  
Sensing the line of conversation had died on its own, Ranma decided to stick around and asked, "Do you know where Kachi is, by chance?"  
  
Kasumi's demeanor suddenly became more subdued. "She finally discovered Grandfather and Grandmother were dead. She was very depressed. Father tried to comfort her. Mother was actually quite nice and merely told him to leave her alone instead of hitting him. And he did what she asked without complaining. He was polite and very understanding of her pain. I think they're making progress. Afterwards she went to visit their grave. I don't know when she'll be back."  
  
The sound of the front door shutting came to their ears.   
  
"Maybe that's her now?" Kasumi suggested.  
  
Ranma headed toward the front door. He saw that luck was on his side for a change and that the arrival was indeed Kachiko. He noticed that she was clothed in an unusually somber black dress as she sat on the floor, halfway through the process of removing her shoes. Ranma waited until she had stood up before saying, "I wanted to ask you what you said to Akane that's got her so upset."  
  
Kachiko glared at Ranma, obviously not appreciating the tone of voice and letting her disapproval be known in her own. "Do not start on that now," she warned, then headed for the living room.   
  
Remembering what Kasumi said earlier, Ranma tried to mollify her, "I'm sorry about your parents being, you know."  
  
The anger seemed to leave Kachiko for a moment. Her shoulders slumped and an exhausted sigh escaped her lips. "It's just, I sort of thought of this time traveling thing as a vacation from them. I didn't think they were, you know. I might not have gotten along with them, but still, I didn't want them...."  
  
Ranma nodded. "Yeah, Pop gets under my skin too, but I don't want anything to happen to him."  
  
Kachiko gave him a sad stare. "I'm not surprised Dad didn't last long after Mom died. To others, he might have seemed cold to her, but they were devoted to one another. Sometimes I got a little jealous, since they seemed to love each other more than me. I just..." She rubbed her eyes. "Look, I don't even want to talk about it anymore. It's like Sakura being old and having kids. It's all in the past and I just have to adjust to it. I've always been good at adjusting to things. If I wasn't, I'd be upset about being here now instead of delighted at avoiding that fate you said was waiting for me in the past."  
  
It sounded to Ranma as though Kachiko was trying to convince herself of the statement. Rather than challenging it, he said, "Yeah. You're real lucky you're here." Sensing Kachiko was somewhat mollified, Ranma tried to ease the conversation back along his original intent. "Akane's feeling pretty bad too. Maybe you ought to talk to her about what's wrong and work something out."  
  
Ranma's sense proved wrong as Kachiko's anger returned, more than doubling from before. "Look, if she wants to act like she's Miss Goody-Goody and so much better than everyone else, fine, but I'm not pretending her little self-proclaimed 'act of kindness' didn't !#$% everything up! If she thinks I'm going to pat her on the head and coo about how it's too bad she didn't win, but boy, it certainly was gee-golly nice she saved the cat and that's all that matters, she can kiss my #$%! What really matters is results. If she's having problems choking on that heaping dose of reality I fed her, that's her problem. Someone should have explained the way the world really works to her long before now."  
  
"You're being way too harsh," Ranma said.  
  
Kachiko gave him a half-lidded stare. "No, I'm being realistic. Having pure motives and a good intentions does NOT mean you always win in the end. You want to try and stand on some pretend moral high ground so you can be above everyone else, fine, but don't snivel and cry when you learn it's not as high as you think and you're not rewarded for your behavior."  
  
Taken aback by such open vehemence, Ranma got out, "That seems a little cynical."  
  
Kachiko's disdain grew. "Don't mistake cynicism for being realistic. Here's a little story to illustrate my point..."  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko looked timidly around the corner of the school hallway, sticking just enough of her head around it so she could get a clear view of what had captured her attention without readily revealing her presence. She remained motionless, unconsciously sighing at the slender young man who was chatting away with several other students.  
  
A finger tapped Kachiko on the shoulder, drawing her attention. She turned to see her best friend in the whole world, Sakura Daisho looking at her and shaking her head sadly.   
  
"Boy, you've got it bad for Bosatsu," Sakura said in a disapproving voice.  
  
"I don't know what you mean." Kachiko's attempt at feigning innocence had the same success she would have had being employed at a bordello and remaining a virgin.  
  
Sakura walked around the corner and let herself be seen openly staring at Bosatsu. "This isn't like you at all. Ever since you started dating last year you haven't acted the least bit hesitant about going after some guy that catches your eye. Actually, you go after nearly every guy that catches your eye."  
  
"I know." Kachiko confirmed, all the while remaining hidden around the corner.  
  
"He's bishonen. You don't like bishonen guys. You've never understood why any girl would want to go out with a guy more feminine than them," Sakura pointed out  
  
"I know."  
  
Sakura continued. "He tutors his classmates. He helps old ladies across the street. He even spends time at a soup kitchen for the homeless and never asks for anything in return. He just smiles and says he's glad to help. He's your classic 'nice guy'."  
  
"So?"  
  
Sakura rolled her eyes. "You've never been attracted to nice guys. You always express disdain whenever someone goes on about one. You always complain they're boring, predictable, uninteresting, and that you can't stand the fact their nobility illustrates just how morally corrupt you really are."  
  
Kachiko nodded her head. "I know. I... Wait a minute. I never said the last part."  
  
"I added it, but only because it's true," Sakura assured her.  
  
Kachiko tried to get angry, but failed. Anger was not an emotion she could ever direct towards Sakura. Annoyance, frequently, but not anger. "I know. By all rights I shouldn't be interested in him in the slightest. Ordinarily, I'd say he has nothing going for him, except he's good-looking, and looks can only take you so far, Icky Slutzensin illustrating the point perfectly. But...." Kachiko stared around the corner again.  
  
Sakura unleashed an annoyed grunt. "I can't stand seeing you pine away like some lovesick puppy. It makes you seem disgustingly normal, and you're anything but. It's like trying to dress a pig in a suit and tie: it just doesn't work, Icky Slutzensin illustrating the point perfectly. The next thing you know you'll give up martial arts, start dressing in kimonos, and talk about how nice it'll be to settle down and raise a big family."  
  
"That's not funny!" Kachiko snapped, shuddering at the idea of conforming to her parents' desires.   
  
"Then act like you normally do and go ask Bosatsu out," Sakura ordered.   
  
Kachiko began twiddling her thumbs. "What if he says no?"  
  
Sakura slapped her forehead. "Give me a break. Lots of guys have turned you down. And sometimes you even give up on them right away instead of harassing them."  
  
"It's called winning them over and I'll have you know it's worked plenty of times. And sometimes we hit it off and go out on more than one date," Kachiko said satisfactorily. "Besides, it's not like you usually give up after one refusal. As I recall, the number of times you'll try for a guy is tied into how many years older they are than you."  
  
It was Sakura's turn to look indignant. "That's not true. Aoshi was twenty-one and I stopped trying after the third time."  
  
"Wasn't that because your sister was dating him and threatened to kill you if you didn't stop?"  
  
"I didn't say there weren't ulterior reasons involved. Just that I stopped after three times." Sakura looked down the hall again. "What is it about him that's reduced you to this state?"  
  
Kachiko shrugged. Demurely, she said, "I don't know. I just feel different about him from other guys. I always get worried when we talk that I'll say something weird and he'll think I'm stupid."  
  
"You always say stupid things to everyone," Sakura retorted.  
  
"But I don't care what everyone else thinks," Kachiko said. "Around him, I do. And his being a nice guy isn't irritating, like it is from all the other nice wishy-washy guys. It's freaky."  
  
"And if I told you he has a thing for girls that dress in kimonos?" Sakura asked.  
  
"Really?" Kachiko chewed in her thumb in thought. "I guess I could wear one. It's not like it would kill me. Mom's even bought me a lot of different ones, so I have a variety choose from. Do you know what color he likes?"  
  
Sakura let out a noise of pure disgust. "That's it. If you're worried about what to wear to impress a guy, it's got to be love at first sight."  
  
Kachiko said, "We've already had this conversation. There is no such thing as love at first sight. Love can only come about after two people learn about one another and grow together over time. It's just lust until then."  
  
"If that's the closest you can get to love at first sight, then that's what it is," Sakura said. She looked down the hall. "All his friends have gone. This is your opportunity. Walk up to him and ask him out."  
  
"Right. I need to stop acting like some cowardly simpering girl and take the initiative." Kachiko firmed her resolve, started to head down the hallway, then turned around and hid around the corner. "On the other hand, there's something to be said about not having my dreams crushed and spirit trampled. I can be content to admire him from afar."  
  
Sakura shook her head. "But I wouldn't. Seeing you so spineless, why, I'd be compelled to write on the walls of the bathroom stalls how attracted you are to Yumi and send love letters to Icky in your name."  
  
"No!" Kachiko gasped. "How can you say such horrible things and call yourself my friend?"  
  
Sakura said, "Because a real friend will throw you into the line of fire if it's for your own good, even if it means you'll hate them for it later."  
  
"That's a stupid thing to say!"  
  
"It's what you told me right before you shoved me into the ocean in order to help me overcome my fear of swimming."  
  
Kachiko laughed nervously. "Oh, right. Forgot about that."  
  
Sakura nodded. "You helped me get over my fear. Now it's only right, and vengeful, that I do the same to you."  
  
"You're an evil person."  
  
"It's why we get along so well. We're two peas in a pod," Sakura stated coolly. "Now, are you going to go down there and ask him out, or do I shout out 'Bosatsu, Kachi likes you,' down the hall?"  
  
"I'll do it! I'll do it!" Kachiko insisted. This time when she left the cover of her corner, she didn't duck back, mostly because Sakura repositioned herself in-between Kachiko and the wall. Sensing her friend would make good on all her threats in the misguided belief it would be in Kachiko's best interest, she forced one foot in front of the other, eventually repeating it often enough to be called 'walking' and approached Bosatsu.  
  
She made it only halfway toward him when Wakaba appeared from a side hall and approached the bishonen youth. For some reason, seeing another good friend speaking so casually to Bosatsu relaxed Kachiko and she increased her speed.  
  
Eventually Kachiko drew close enough to overhear Wakaba saying, "...and I was wondering if you might, that is if you'd like to go ou-"  
  
She was abruptly cut off as Kachiko moved in-between Wakaba and Bosatsu and said, "Hold on for a second, I have to ask him something important."  
  
Wakaba's face turned bright red. "Oh no you don't! You are not stealing another one away from me just when I finally worked up the courage to ask-"  
  
Kachiko held her up hand. "I promise that from now on I will not take the last of the Jello from you at lunch before you get to it."  
  
Wakaba turned bright red. "That was not what I'm talking about!"  
  
"Cool. Then it'll be first come first serve, same as always. That would be fair, right?"  
  
"Of course," Wakaba said, crossing her arms before the dawn of realization set in. "Wait! That's not fair-"  
  
But Kachiko had already started to say, "Anyhow, Bosatsu, I happen to be free tonight and was wondering if-"  
  
This time it was Kachiko's turn to be cut off as a large divan landed on top of her. The piece of furniture was so large it caught Wakaba too, flattening her underneath its broad bottom. Only Bosatsu remained outside the impact site.  
  
A high lilting laugh pierced the air. "Hoohoohoohoohoo! Bosatsu, my sweet. At last I, the ravishing, effervescent, and fabulously wealthy, Miko Mizuhara, have arrived. Leave us, my faithful horde of lackeys." She waved away the burly men that had borne her on the silk covered divan. Once clear, she stood up, then all but sauntered as she approached the bishonen boy.  
  
"Hello. How are you doing, Miko?" Bosatsu said pleasantly.  
  
Before she could answer, the divan she had just walked off was hurled away with incredible force, embedding itself in a nearby wall.   
  
The person responsible for the destruction stood up, a fiery aura of rage glowing about her. Kachiko's slitted eyes tried boring holes into the one who had dared disturb her at the moment of truth. Miko Mizuhara was everything she claimed to be. She was extraordinarily attractive, with flowing dark hair that cascaded down her back, tall, with long legs, high cheekbones, and a more than ample bust. She had modeled extensively for her mother's world famous clothing line, as well as the line of high priced sports cars her father's automobile company manufactured. She was also proficient in Martial Arts Cheerleading, giving her a reputation for being able to kick ass when she had to. Even now she was adorned in her cheerleader garb, pompoms attached to the belt that perfectly complimented her blue top and yellow skirt. Kachiko had encountered the arrogant annoyance on multiple occasions, each time the rich bitch managing to get under her skin with practically no effort. Usually breathing the same air was sufficient.   
  
Kachiko huffed and pounded her fist to her chest in a gesture reminiscent of a belligerent gorilla defending its territory. "You stupid wench, how dare you drop that thing on me!"  
  
A gurgling came from the floor.   
  
"And poor, innocent Wakaba," Kachiko added.  
  
Cattily, Miko said, "A thousand pardons, I failed to notice you there, Koochie-koo Tendon."  
  
"That's Kachiko Tendou!" she spat out. "What are you doing here? This isn't even your school. You should be at Saint Drunkies."  
  
"Saint Hebereke," Miko corrected, some ice finally entering her voice. "And as to my purpose, well, the fact that I attend an all girl's school is the very reason as to why I am here." She sidled up to Bosatsu. "I have come to ask Bosa-chan out on a date."  
  
Kachiko went from mildly red straight to purple with rage, skipping the various hues in-between. "You can't ask him out! I'm asking him out!"  
  
Miko sniffed disdainfully. "Don't be ridiculous. Bosa-chan and I go way back. We're practically childhood friends."  
  
Bosatsu laughed nervously, "We only met last week when I was helping the children at the orphanage and you came in to take shelter from the rain. By the way, it was very nice of you to donate five hundred thousand yen like that, and to give the orphans all that designer clothing."  
  
Miko smiled nonchalantly. "Mother had them lying around. The poor little waifs had no style to call their own. I'm just glad I could make their lives a little brighter, and give them some fashion sense."  
  
"You're just trying to buy his affections, you yen pinching bitch," Kachiko accused in a spluttered gasp.  
  
Lighting fast, a baton was thrust under Kachiko's chin, catching her momentarily off-guard. In less than a heartbeat, she regained her composure and backed out of the weapon's reach.   
  
Miko softly intoned, "It would behoove you to recant that awful innuendo."  
  
Instantly apologetic, Kachiko said, "Very well. I'm sorry. I meant to say no matter how hard you try, you don't have enough money in the bank to buy Bosatsu's affections."  
  
"That was not a retraction, you flat-chested worm!" Miko snarled.  
  
Kachiko's eyebrow began to twitch madly. "Men are interested in more than looks, you walking set of tits."  
  
An amused laugh escaped Miko's lips. "If that was the case, I wouldn't be making an outrageous salary modeling, now would I?"  
  
"No amount of money is worth being known as the 'Bimbo of the Walkway'."  
  
The insult, one that had graced the covers of more than one tabloid, caused Miko's eyebrow to twitch ferociously in time with Kachiko's. In response, she leveled her baton like a rapier, right at the smaller girl's chest. "That insult is more than I can bear. Prepare to have a civil tongue beaten into you, Tengu!"  
  
"That's Tendou!" Kachiko snapped.   
  
The two leaped forward, intent on landing the first blow in a fight that would reach legendary proportions, even in the hallowed tomes of Furinken's extensive, violent history.  
  
However, the huge section of ceiling that landed squarely upon the duo's heads relegated the conflict to little more than a passing footnote in the index of the school's archives.  
  
Floating down on butterfly-like wings, a beautiful, alien woman flew down through the hole and hovered next to Bosatsu. She was humanoid, but clearly not human. Besides the wings projecting from her back, her skin had an azure hue with dark patches all around, and a pair of small antenna sprang forth from her temples. Despite her alien countenance, she was incredibly ravishing, like something out of a poem woven by the bards of old.   
  
In a melodic voice that would have made even the greatest songstress green with envy, the girl stared deeply into Bosatsu's eyes and said in musical rhyme,   
~I am Arianna, the Faerie Queen.~   
~Here I descend, to share my dream.~  
  
Casually, Bosatsu said, "It's a pleasure meeting you as well."  
  
Pleased by his response, she said,  
~Your handsome form has caught my eye.~  
~Never should such beauty die.~  
~Allow you, my consort to be.~  
~Together bound, for eternity.~  
  
Bosatsu took the conversation in stride, as though faeries floating down through the ceiling and hitting on him was an everyday occurrence.   
  
Beneath Arianna's floating form came a rumbling sound. She flew away from the source of the disturbance to hover at Bosatsu's side.  
  
Kachiko and Miko stood up, the massive chunk of ceiling held above their heads. As one they heaved the piece away, the pair sharing a mutual look of rage at the Faerie Queen.  
  
Kachiko said, "Back off from my man, you oversized insect, or I'll stuff a can of Raid where the sun don't shine!"  
  
Miko seconded it with, "What the barbarian said, except for Bosa-chan being her man, since he's mine."  
  
Arianna stared at them idly.  
~Ugly trolls, whose voices demand.~  
~Leave my presence, by my command.~  
  
"What did you just call us?" Miko sputtered.  
  
Order given, Arianna turned away from the enraged girls and settled her loving gaze upon Bosatsu yet again. Her hand glowed red briefly. The glow faded, and in it was small circle of gold.  
~Tis time to go, oh future King.~  
~ Our beginning sealed with this ring.~  
  
Bosatsu politely bowed away. "Sorry. Your offer is tempting, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to turn it down."  
  
Arianna drew back in confusion.   
~Surely you jest.~  
~This would be for the best.~  
~To the Kingdom we must travel.~  
~Before my spell does unravel.~  
  
Again, the young man shook his head. "Sorry. I'm just not looking to settle down in a magical land anytime soon. I'm sort of a down to earth kind of guy. I do appreciate your offer. I'm very flattered that you would express interest in me when there are so many guys to choose from."  
  
The Faerie Queen recoiled, red fire flashing in her eyes and sneer on her lips. Her musical voice took on an ominous tone.  
~You are a fool, who bears coarse rejection.~  
~And dares to release it upon this form of perfection.~  
~My heart's ire has been wrought, my wrath unbound.~  
~Let you who would play with a queen's affection, fall into a sleep most sound.~  
  
Arianna held out her hand, palm flat and open, directly in front of Bosatsu. She blew lightly upon it. In response, a shower of golden dust rose from her hand and struck Bosatsu directly in the face.   
  
Caught off-guard, Bosatsu caught a deep breath of the dust. He fanned his hand back and forth in an effort to wave the powder away. His nose crinkled. "Hey, that smelled...just... like... lilac..." His eyes closed and he slumped to the ground.   
  
"What did you do to him?" Miko asked, her eyes tearing at seeing Bosatsu lying so still that he could have been mistaken for a corpse.  
  
Arianna smiled in satisfaction at his downed form.  
~And so it goes, a curse unleashed.~  
~Upon one who would --Urk!"   
  
The rest of Arianna's proclamation was cut off by an arm wrapped around her windpipe, one that began squeezing very tightly and cutting off her supply of oxygen.  
  
"Wake him up!" Kachiko snarled.  
  
Arianna choked out,  
~To defile my being, is painfully vain.~  
~Now unto you, shall be done the same.~  
  
Arianna's skin changed from its azure hue to a brown one. Her soft, perfect epidermis took on a wooden texture, identical to that of a tree. From every square inch of her body, jagged thorns sprouted outward.  
  
The effect was instantaneous as Kachiko cried out in pain at the thorns suddenly thrust into every part of her that was in contact with her foe. Rather than release her hold and detach herself from the impalement, she bit through the pain and instead tightened the hold on Arianna's throat.  
  
"Knock it off!" Kachiko hissed in equal parts rage and pain.  
  
Eyes threatening to roll into the back of her head from her asphyxiation, Arianna's skin reverted to its previous texture. No longer the flawless melody of before, she gasped out,  
~Release me, I shall remain.~  
~A word is given. A bond sustained.~  
  
Slowly, Kachiko released her hold from Arianna's neck. Instantly, Miko was there, bending the faerie's arm behind her back in a firm grip bordering on painful. "Wake Bosa-chan up."  
  
Arianna shook her head.   
~Beyond my ability, to lift the veil of sleep.  
~The Shadebringer's Breath, works its way too deep.  
  
"There has to be a way." Miko brought Arianna's arm higher until the wrist was as high as the shoulder blades.  
  
Arianna yelped out in pain,  
~A cure can be had, in the Forest of Vare.~  
~A place whose tread, no one may dare.~  
~A flower which blossoms in the middle of the Glade.~  
~ Vermilion, whose breath can contest the powers of Shade.~  
  
"Then we'll just have to get some, won't we?" Kachiko said pointedly to Arianna.  
  
Arianna shook her head.  
~Impossible for me, a Child of Faerie.~  
~The denizens hate us, and in turn we are wary.~  
~Once there, my powers would flee.~  
~Once there, forever, never to be free.~  
  
"Could someone from Earth go?" Kachiko asked.  
  
Arianna nodded.   
~No powers to lose, so some have tried.~  
~None have returned, no matter how they vied.~  
  
"Can you send us there from here and back again?" Kachiko prodded.  
  
Arianna didn't answer at first. A twisting reminder of the compromising position of her arm and loosened her tongue.  
~A portal, I can maintain.~  
~So long as it is here I remain.~  
  
"Isn't that convenient?" Miko said dubiously.   
  
"We're going to have to take her word for it. Time's running out," Kachiko nodded her head in the direction of where Bosatsu was being cared for by Wakaba and Sakura. "Open this portal thing," she ordered.  
  
Arianna began a low incantation, than her voice hesitated.   
~ Too much pain, I cannot chant.~  
~Loosen thy hold, or my vow, I recant.~  
  
Reluctantly, Miko eased her grip ever so slightly. When it was obvious she would release the limb no further, Arianna chanted again.   
  
To the crowd that had gathered to watch the spectacle, the reverberation from the faerie's incantation seemed to hum through their very minds rather than their ears. A sparkling vertical whirlpool of energy suddenly appeared in mid-air, growing with every musical note from Arianna's mouth. The vortex composed of motes of light swirled so fast it was almost blinding, and many of the bystanders had to shield their eyes. Within moments, the chanting reached a crescendo, and the vortex ceased growing. The song finished, there was a moment of silence, the portal itself not making the slightest noise despite its rapid movement.   
  
Kachiko stared grimly at the brilliant display. "No sense in waiting. Let's save the day."  
  
"I don't think you should go," Sakura mentioned as she left Bosatsu in Wakaba's care.   
  
"Don't be stupid. I have to save him," Kachiko said.  
  
Sakura walked closer until she was standing next to her friend. She pointed at the school outfit Kachiko wore.  
  
For the first time, Kachiko assessed the damage Arianna's thorny exterior had wrought. Tiny bloodstains, numbering well over a hundred, dotted both her garment and her legs. None of them were particularly large, but combined they had a very disturbing effect, as though someone had emptied a squirt gun full of red dye at her.   
  
Kachiko waved at the damage dismissively. "It's nothing."  
  
Sakura jabbed her finger at the origin of one of the bloodstains. Kachiko winced slightly.  
  
"I'll be fine," Kachiko insisted. She turned to Miko, "Come on, let's go."  
  
Miko's head jerked, as though she had been startled by the suggestion. Hesitantly, she said, "I don't think my going would be such a good idea. Bosatsu would feel terrible if I was hurt for his sake. He's just that sort of guy, and I wouldn't want to hurt his feelings. But you seem pretty callous, and I'm sure you can ignore his sentiments. And there's the matter of you being more expendable than I am. I have a lot of people relying on me, but you don't. You should go. Besides," she gave a twist of Arianna's arm, causing the Faerie Queen to wince. "Someone has to make sure Tinkerbell doesn't try to pull a fast one and shut down the portal. Getting the flower does no one any good if there's no way to return."  
  
Sakura growled, "Of all the cheap, weak excuses for cowardice-"  
  
"Enough," Kachiko said with more than a hint of finality. "Someone does need to ensure the portal stays open. And we'll see who Bosatsu's more appreciative of after I save his neck." She smirked at Miko.  
  
The cheerleader simply gave a disdainful shake of her head. Arianna winced again, the hold on her arm shifting and not for the better.   
  
Deciding there was no sense in prolonging things, Kachiko told the others, "Wish me luck!" and jumped into the portal.   
  
"Good luck!" Sakura called out.  
  
"Don't screw up, Tendon!" Miko cried out.  
  
Kachiko shouted an off color comment toward Miko, and then was fully immersed in the vortex.  
  
There was no sense of traveling or disorientation. It was as though she had simply made a tiny leap from one side of the hall to the other. However, despite the fact it felt as though she had moved no more than a couple of feet, the environment said otherwise.  
  
Kachiko took inventory of her surroundings. She found herself standing on a flat, green plain, the portal hanging in the air directly behind her. Fields of flowers rode in three directions as far as could be seen, their colors ranging from common to unearthly shades that hurt the eyes to merely look at.   
  
Ahead of her, in the direction she has stepped out, was a vast forest that seemed to be a solid wall of trees and greenery. Where there wasn't bark, there were huge shrubs with thick branches, all of them taller than Kachiko. It appeared all but impassable without a machete to chop a way through.   
  
"That's got to be the forest the bug was talking about." Kachiko found the sound of her voice reassuring in such an alien land. Under different circumstances, she might have considered it a magnificent world, but here and now, it was alien terrain that represented in impediment to her goal.  
  
She walked up to the wall of greenery, trying to find some indication of a path, or even a lessening in the barrier. "Couldn't be easy, could it? Damn flower couldn't just be sitting right in front of the portal and I couldn't just grab it and get back to save Bosatsu and rub it in that walking pair of tits' face?" she grumbled.   
  
A seductive voice broke the stillness in the air. "There are more interesting sights than the Forest of Vare, mortal. By all means, come over here and allow me to show you pleasures your limited mind has never fathomed."  
  
Kachiko turned to see a nude woman, one whose unearthly foreign beauty reminded her of Ingrid, though the comparison was along the lines of Wakaba compared to Miko when it came to looks. The newcomer posed seductively against a tree, having appeared out of nowhere. Long strands of blond hair curled about her body, hiding it in strategic locations. The simmering stare she gave Kachiko left no doubt to her desires.   
  
Kachiko shook her head. "Look, you over-endowed bimbo, that slutty come on might work with bulldykes like Yumi, but I'm afraid I am immune to your little charms."  
  
"Do not be so certain." She removed the hair from its strategic locations. "Now come to me, oh virile one. It is has been long since I have had one of your kind."  
  
"I am not interested!" Kachiko insisted.  
  
The newcomer's eyes widened. "Impossible. You must desire to have sex with me. There is no choice in the matter. None are the mortal men that can resist Suyaere's charms!"  
  
Now livid, Kachiko raged, "I am not a guy, you air-headed nymphomaniac!"  
  
"That's just 'nymph' not 'nymphomaniac'." Suyaere corrected, then stared at Kachiko in confusion. "But you're built like a man. Are you certain you're not one of those eunuch creatures I have heard about? That would explain your lack of interest in me."  
  
"Why you!" Kachiko snarled, the pulled up her top and removed her bra. "Look at these!"  
  
Suyaere squinted slightly. "Those qualify as breasts only in the loosest sense of the word. Better you should take these as an example." The nymph handled her own chest for emphasis.   
  
"There's more to being good-looking than a huge rack! There's personality, and attitude, and martial arts skill, and... stuff!"  
  
Suyaere considered that. "I have heard many women claim that, but never the men. They seem more interested in my huge... rack?" The final word seemed foreign to her tongue.   
  
"Yeah, wait until they start sagging on you," Kachiko taunted. "They'll be dragging on the ground like an ape's knuckles, especially since you don't even have the decency to wear a bra."  
  
The nymph cocked her head quizzically. "My body does not sag. That happens to mortals. My appearance shall remain as it is from now until the end of time."  
  
Kachiko's eyebrow began twitching. It was a good thing Miko hadn't come along. Whatever this nymphomaniac's secret was, if the more earthly bimbo could learn it, Kachiko would never have been able to find a man again.  
  
Kachiko put her bra and top back on. "Enough of this. Since I'm not a guy, or a dyke, tell me how to get into the forest."  
  
The nymph laughed as though the very ideas was unthinkable. "No mortal is allowed to enter the forest."  
  
"They just enter you, eh?" Kachiko quipped.  
  
"Why yes, at least the men," Suyaere agreed happily.  
  
Seeing the insult was completely lost on the girl, Kachiko shouted. "All right, if you won't help me in, I'll just help myself." And went charging headlong into the nearest shrubs.  
  
It was like moving through molasses (and Kachiko knew exactly what that was like, thanks to one of Yumi's twisted, little, perverted schemes) the flora was so thick. The shrubs seemed to twist into her way, their small branches slashing at her flesh and reopening the numerous cuts the thorns had inflicted.  
  
Kachiko felt like she had barely moved three meters before suddenly bursting through the shrubs and into a clearing. "Well, that wasn't so bad..." the words died on her mouth as she surveyed the scene. In three directions an endless plain of flowers stretched before her, and a vortex of energy hung in the air nearby.   
  
"There's no way I got turned around!" Kachiko insisted.   
  
"How amusing female mortals are." Suyaere literally rolled on the ground in mirth.  
  
"I'll show you amusing," Kachiko started to head toward the nymph, intent on slapping the girl around until her tits wouldn't stop jiggling. She was almost upon her prey when the creature gave its hardest laugh yet and jumped right for the nearest tree.  
  
Kachiko was about to laugh herself at the girl's stupidity -a monumental testament to IQ's being inversely proportional to one's chest size- when instead of smashing headfirst into the tree, she instead disappeared into it, as though it was immaterial.  
  
"What kind of an idiot do you think you're dealing with? You ain't escaping that easily!" Kachiko snarled and hurled herself at the tree as well.   
  
Her head met the trunk with a resounding thud.  
  
As Kachiko returned to her feet, swaying groggily back and forth, Suyaere's head literally popped out of a different tree some distance away. She unleashed a highly feminine giggle. "There is no end to your entertainment value."  
  
The laughter cut through the haze over her thoughts. Kachiko gave a cry of rage and launched herself though the air and toward the head poking out of the tree. Once again, Suyaere retreated into the wood, leaving Kachiko to once again bounce headfirst off the giant plant.  
  
The nymph's head emerged from yet another tree farther away. "You have difficulty learning as well. Perhaps it comes from having tiny breasts."  
  
"Let me in the forest!" Kachiko shouted.   
  
"No mortal my enter the Forest of Vare. Give up, or continuing running into trees. It is most amusing. Not as good as physical pleasure, but it shall suffice."  
  
Kachiko fell to a cross-legged sitting position in front of the tree she had just tackled. It was obvious this nymphomaniac was the one preventing her from entering the forest. She had to persuade the bimbo to let her in. Physical force wasn't going to work. No way would she agree to have sex with her. Some other form of leverage would have to be used. But what was there?  
  
A broad smile erupted across Kachiko's features. She dug her fingers into the tree and ripped off a huge section of bark that was at least two feet wide and equally as long.   
  
Suyaere shook her head. "Oh dear. You're about to outsmart yourself, aren't you? Perhaps you're going to try to cut down the trees? It won't work. They heal more quickly than you can cut."  
  
The nymph's warning proved true as the damaged section healed more than halfway in a handful of seconds.   
  
"I'm not trying to bring them down. Actually, their fixing themselves means I'll have plenty of wood to work with." Kachiko tore a second section, then tried interlocking the pieces. With a little bit of work, she managed to get them connected to one another by tearing out parts of the edge and meshing them together.   
  
"Then what are you trying to do?" Suyaere asked.  
  
"I'm going to put up a sign telling men to stay away from the forest since there's a really ugly, saggy, bitchy hag that's pretending it's a nymph and will try to hit on them."  
  
Suyaere widened in horror. "Noooo! You cannot do that! No men will come, and I need them!"  
  
Kachiko placed her hand to her chin in thought. "I wonder if I should add something about sexually transmitted diseases."  
  
The nymph's bawling doubled. "I'll give you whatever you want, just stop it!"  
  
The sign raising stopped momentarily. "Let me in the forest."  
  
With a wave of her hand, Suyaere made several of the shrubs part, showing a hidden path that led deeper into the forest. "Here, take the path! Just do not put up your cursed signs!"  
  
Goal achieved, Kachiko tossed the bark away. She skipped along, making certain to stick her tongue out at Suyaere as she passed up.   
  
The nymph cried, "I hope the mosquitoes get you, you manlike creature."  
  
"Kiss my !#$" Kachiko shouted, sticking her bottom out in the Suyaere's direction and smacking it once, before heading into the forest.   
  
Kachiko was quickly out of sight of the annoying woodland creature. "Yeah, like a few bug bites are going to stop me. What kind of a wimp does she think I am?"  
  
A humming sound reached Kachiko's ears as a sudden wind gusted, blowing her hair hard enough so that it floated around her head. She spat out several strands, and was trying to prevent the locks from blocking her sight when she became aware of a whirring sound above her. Moving the hair as far from her face as she could, she looked up and saw one of the mosquitoes the nymph had mentioned. She could tell what type of insect it was by its compound eyes, clear, membrane wings, and large proboscis. Making out those features was quite easy, since the insect in question was easily five feet across and just as long.  
  
"Times like these, I really wish I'd quit sticking my nose in other people's business," Kachiko bemoaned.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Fifteen minutes later, a human figure staggered into a large clearing. Seeing the green grass beckon her, she collapsed on the ground in a heap.  
  
To herself, Kachiko rambled, "That wasn't nothing. The human body can risk shedding four or five pints of blood, no problem. Now, I think I'll slip into a coma for a while." She noted there was a nice side affect from the mosquito bites; none of her wounds were bleeding any longer. Not having any blood would have probably gone a long way towards explaining that.   
  
There was no time for sleep as a low whinny caught Kachiko's attention. Summoning all of her remaining strength, she forced her head to point in the direction of the noise. Her tired eyes widened as they located the source of the disturbance.   
  
An equine stood there, a noble beast with rippling muscles over its entire body, balanced adroitly on four nimble legs. Its skin was as white as pristine snow, and an equally white mane traveled down the length of the back of its neck. Despite its obviously proud bearing, one that gave every confidence the creature could run forever without breaking a sweat, its most outstanding feature was the single horn that rose from its forehead. It appeared to be made of the purest gold. It was easily the most magnificent animal Kachiko had ever seen in her entire life.   
  
She rose to her feet and approached the unicorn. "This is so cool. I know all the legends about you, since Principal Faust made European Mythology a mandatory course. You got a thing for letting young virgin girls ride you. Now I got me some transportation through this miserable bug-infested rathole." Kachiko made cooing sounds as she walked to the unicorn, intent on not scaring her future ride.  
  
The creature's only reaction was to turn its hazel eyes in the girl's direction as she drew closer.   
  
The unicorn's easygoing attitude towards her presence made Kachiko laugh. She walked more confidently, knowing it had no intention of running now. "I wonder if I have to ride him bareback or if there's a saddle somewhere around here."  
  
Kachiko was looking for something to use as a makeshift halter and bridle as she held her hand out to allow the unicorn to sniff it and become familiar with her. The instant she drew within a foot of the animal, its head descended towards her hand, snapping at it. Only Kachiko's finely honed martial artist reflexes prevented her from losing a few fingers.   
  
"Hey! What's the big idea!" Kachiko snapped.  
  
The whole demeanor of the unicorn changed. It snarled in anger, its irises turning red as it reared up and lashed out with its powerful forelegs.   
  
Kachiko had to leap to the left to avoid the hooves aimed at her skull. "Knock it off! I'm a virgin, I'm telling you!"  
  
The horse whinnied in anger again.  
  
Kachiko began backing away. "Come on! Letting one guy feel me up a couple of times does not constitute a loss of my undefiled status!"  
  
The unicorn lowered its head and aimed its sharp and pointy horn right at the girl.  
  
"Ahhh!" Kachiko screamed as she began running away from the charging beast. "This is so unfair! The legends should specifically say you only like uptight girls that have never let a guy get as far as second base!"  
  
Kachiko began darting around, making sharp cuts and turns. Evading the unicorn wasn't easy as the beast seemed intent on impressing her with its bull imitation by goring her.   
  
Eventually the unicorn anticipated one of the Kachiko's turns. She barely had enough time to evade the horn, which snagged part of her blouse and tore it open as the animal went past.  
  
"I'm swear I'm going to turn you into glue when this is over with!" Kachiko paused long enough to shake her fist at the unicorn before running in a straight line for the wall of trees she had originally emerged from.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The equine gave another high pitched whinny and charged again. It targeted her bottom, keeping her right between its eyes. Each step allowed it to draw closer to her fleeing form. It unleashed a feral snarl as its horn brushed against the brown of her skirt.  
  
Suddenly, she wasn't there. However, there was still a vision of brown directly in front of it; a substance somewhat harder than cotton.  
  
It's full speed charge suddenly stopped as the unicorn's horn impacted with the tree trunk.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxx  
  
Perched above in the branch she was clinging to, Kachiko looked down at the sight of the animal with its horn buried to the hilt within the tree trunk. She began laughing at the top of her lungs. "Serves you right! Only a dumb animal would me stupid enough to run right into a tree like that. Hahahaha... ha... ha." Kachiko's laughter died as she recalled an incident from earlier in the day.   
  
Convinced the unicorn was firmly embedded in the tree, and wasn't going anywhere despite its wild attempts to tear free of the trap, Kachiko released her hold on the branch and landed directly behind the unicorn. She cracked her knuckles loudly. "Now, why don't we see how I can repay you for trying to run me through?"  
  
The unicorn lashed out with its rear legs. Both met Kachiko solidly in the gut, and she was sent sailing away, landing hard on her back as the breath was knocked out of her lungs twice over.  
  
Kachiko slowly returned to her feet. Between gasps, she got out, "That... didn't... hurt. Only... out... of... breath... from... running." She waited a few moments until she recovered her wind, then shook her finger in a warning gesture to the still immobile animal. "You're just lucky I still have to save a hot guy, or I'd take the time out to give you a lesson you wouldn't forget."   
  
Still holding her stomach, Kachiko continued walking through the glade and headed deeper into the forest. The next time their class studied European mythology, she was going to straighten out her instructors on a few of those misconceptions that seemed to be integral to those legends.  
  
Kachiko hadn't traveled more than a couple hundred meters when the gentle notes of music reached her ears. It was from an instrument that was both eerie and melodic at the same time. Her eyes took on a vacant stare, and her stride a more wooden cadence as she headed towards the source of the melody.  
  
The music taunted and lured at the same time. The source pulled at her, leading to a ring of rocks in the middle of the clearing. Each one was slender and jutted upward in an arc, like giant fingers beckoning one to come within. Kachiko did so, walking until she had entered the ring and could see what lay in the center.  
  
The music maker was a man from the torso up, while his lower half was that of a goat. There were some features that crossed the unseen line of demarcation: a pair of ram's horns projected from the sides of his head, while he walked on two legs, though they ended in cloven hooves rather than feet.   
  
The satyr was dancing merrily as he played the tune on his pan flute. Once Kachiko entered the ring, still using her slow, wooden gate, the satyr ceased his playing. His eyes held a lecherous gleam as they settled on the girl.  
  
"Ah, a woman from the mortal plane. I am overjoyed by your presence. Welcome," he gave a deep bow. "I see the sound of my magical melody had entranced your soul, as it does with all such females of your realm. Far too long has it been since I have enjoyed the... pleasures of your kind. Since you will be my plaything until you grow old and unpleasant to my eyes, I shall allow you to entertain me, starting now." His lecherous look doubled as he emphasized the final part of his pronouncement.   
  
Kachiko continued walking until she was standing next to him. He took a moment to admire her appearance.  
  
"Hmm, not the best looking woman I've ever seen, but you'll do. I hate to admit it, but I'm pretty hard up. Ever since that damned nymph showed up she won't let women in. They have to trick her, or slip past her when she's distracted by a man." He raised a hand toward Kachiko's chest. "And now, I'll give you a chance to distrACK!" he cried out as her hand grabbed his throat and he suddenly found it difficult to breathe.  
  
"Impossible," he rasped out. "My magical music will enchant any mortal woman."  
  
Kachiko said, "It probably would have, save for one little problem: you used a pan flute."  
  
"So?"  
  
"I HATE PAN FLUTES!" Kachiko screeched, shaking him like a rag doll. "My entire life, the only music that's played at my home is the pan flute. Mother fancies herself an expert and plays it constantly! It's the only kind of music she lets me and the old man listen to on the radio! I've had to hear that creepy instrument my entire life! The first words from my mouth were, 'Not Zamphir again'! There is nothing I detest or hate more than the sound of a pan flute! I would rather hear Yoko Ono sing endlessly with only a xylophone for musical accompaniment than be subjected to one more note from that obscene instrument! The instant I heard the first stupid note, I knew I had to stop its source, even if it meant killing whoever was playing it!"  
  
The satyr gasped out, "I'm a lover, not a fighter."   
  
"That just makes it easier to kill you!"  
  
The satyr broke the instrument across his knee and held up the two pieces for Kachiko to see.  
  
She considered the two pieces warily. "I don't know. You were playing it for an awful long time. I think I should kill you anyway."  
  
"Wait, I can do other things that would make me useful to you," the creature rasped out.  
  
"Like what?" Kachiko asked.  
  
He gave a dazzling smile, despite being slowly strangled. "I'm great at sex."  
  
"Do I look desperate enough to take up bestiality?!" The grip tightened.   
  
"I can help you get out of the forest alive," he was barely able to say.  
  
"There is that." Kachiko's grip loosened, but her hand remained around the neck. "Can you take me to some Glade where the blossom that can counteract the Nightbringer's Breath is?"  
  
"Not if you want to get out alive."  
  
The hold tightened again.  
  
The satyr said, "I don't mean I can't take you to it. I mean it's too deadly. Anyone, even the denizens of Vare don't go there. It would kill us too. It's sort of the seedy slum side of the forest."  
  
"Tough, I need the flower."  
  
Seeing she was determined, either to retrieve the flower or asphyxiate him, the satyr relented. "Very well. I can lead you to the Glade. But don't expect me to enter it."  
  
"Fine." Kachiko released her hold, but made it clear that if he tried anything, nothing would prevent her from feeding him the broken pan flute.   
  
The satyr stood there, messaging his neck. Once he could speak more clearly, he said, "Since you're determined to die, want to go out with a bang?" He gave her a lascivious stare.  
  
She kneed him in the groin.   
  
"That'll suffice," the satyr squeaked, and promptly led her away.  
  
The trek took over an hour, most of it spent walking over various paths that all appeared the same to Kachiko. She was beginning to think the satyr was playing some sort of game when the forest took on a much more ominous air. The flora, which had seemed bright and cheerful (though unquestionably alien) became dismal, and cast a forbidding pall over everything. The shades of greenery became darker, and Kachiko's mood worsened.   
  
Soon they emerged from the forest and into a glade. Unlike the others they had crossed, this one was far more foreboding. Many of the trees surrounding it bore no leaves, and their bare branches resembled dark, sickly fingers waiting for someone to wander too near so that they could be grabbed and have unspeakable things inflicted upon them.  
  
"Creepy," Kachiko said softly, her words muted, as though the air itself was sucking the life from them.   
  
The satyr wordlessly nodded in agreement.  
  
Kachiko was about to lose hope when she spotted a flower that seemed out of place in the glade. It was bright, and instilled a sense of optimism where none was to be found. It resided on a small finger of land that poked out of a pool of water that resembled a puddle more than a pond; one that had an oil tanker disgorge its contents in it. A host of sickly yellow vines ringed the pond, and there was a pile of what appeared to be dead leaves four times as tall as Kachiko that was surrounded by the vines.  
  
"Is that it?"  
  
"Aye, the Vermilion. Are you certain you don't want a quick roll before you go?"   
  
Kachiko shot him an evil glare.  
  
The satyr began backing away. "Sorry, you're the only girl I've seen in over ten years. Gets pretty lonely. Anyway, this is where I leave. I'd like to say it's been nice knowing you, but I'm only good at lying when it comes to seducing a woman." He moved back into the woods, disappearing from sight as the trees seemed to swallow him.  
  
Kachiko's eyes scanned the entire glade. There were no animals. No obvious traps. There's weren't even any of the creepy trees near the flower. There was nothing in her way, save for the pond.  
  
"Goat face was just being a weenie," Kachiko said, mostly to assure herself as she took a tentative step forward, ready for anything to jump out and try to devour her.  
  
Nothing happened. She took one cautious step, then another. Still nothing challenged her path to her goal.   
  
"Ha! This place is way overrated." She walked more confidently. It was like she always said. Rumors and myths built things up so that what was believed to be the truth was actually as far from the reality as possible. All this place had going against it was an ominous pall and bad fishing.   
  
She continued forward, walking through the vines and to the edge of the small pond. Oily black, it was impossible to judge its depth. Kachiko considered it small, and not very deep. In the worst case scenario, it might make it up to her knees, judging by the slope of the ground and the distance from 'shore' to where the flower lay.  
  
And then she felt the vines slither up her legs, wrapping themselves around her limbs and tightening as they went, becoming as hard as steel cables.  
  
"What's going on?!" She struggled futilely against the vines as they moved up her body to wrap around her arms.  
  
The pile of leaves erupted, sending a geyser of decayed plant material in the air. Hidden within the refuse was a plant that resembled a giant Venus fly trap, especially when it came to its broad mouth and sharp, pointy teeth.  
  
Kachiko tried using all of her strength to tear free of the vines confining her body. For a moment they held firm, but thoughts of Bosatsu remaining in a coma for the rest of his life filled her with strength, and she tore free. She slumped to the ground, weak beyond measure, and was barely able to regain her footing.  
  
More vines moved into position, cutting off any route of escape as the giant plant's maw snapped in her direction.   
  
"I definitely should have convinced Miko to come along. That wide butt of hers would have had that thing chewing for hours." Kachiko tensed her legs up, and leapt.  
  
The plant's jaws snapped shut, engulfing Kachiko's entire body. The plant swallowed, burped once, then settled down back into its previous curled up position.  
  
All was silent in the forest.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Sounds drifted through the swirl of colors.   
  
A voice recognizable as Wakaba's stated enthusiastically, "All I'm saying is you should let me slap the bitch around a bit."   
  
"But that might shut down the portal," Sakura protested.  
  
"Then we lose Kachi and find an alternate way of waking Bosatsu up. There is no downside to this."  
  
"Only if we find another way of awakening Bosa-chan," Miko's voice said. "I am getting worried about Koochie-koo. She has been gone for a while. Perhaps she has failed. She is incompetent, as well as stupid. But I don't want to have to go. I might get hurt, and Bosa-chan would never forgive himself if something bad happened to me for his sake."  
  
"Your concern for his feelings knows no bonds," Sakura commented dryly.  
  
The discussion ended abruptly as from the center of the vortex emerged the worn form of Kachiko Tendou. She was almost naked, with only the remains of clothing covering her in a few strategic spots. Half of her hair was several centimeters shorter than the other half. She was dripping with some sort of foul smelling slime, and a bizarre, squirrel-like creature was attached to her ankle, viciously trying to gnaw on it.  
  
As she stepped foot back onto her plain of existence, Kachiko raised a hand upward triumphantly. All could see the bright flower clutched in its grasp, as though it held the salvation of the world.   
  
Sakura's eyes widened. "My god, Kachi. You look like hell."  
  
"You do," Wakaba said happily.  
  
Miko looked at her curiously. "Does she? She usually looks so repulsive, it's hard for me to judge."  
  
Sakura moved to Kachiko's side. "What happened?"   
  
An inane smile on her face, Kachiko said, "Lots of bad things. Dyke came onto me. Some goat played the pan flute and tried to get me into bestiality. A walking mushroom hit me with some spores and made me realize I'm actually composed of cheese. Oh yes, and a mosquito bit me."  
  
"The slime?" Wakaba asked.  
  
"Plant digestive juice," Kachiko explained. "That was probably the worst. A carnivorous plant was going to eat me, but I tricked him by jumping right into his mouth and down his throat. I swam through his digestive tract and out the other side before it could dissolve me. Much."  
  
Miko said, "You mean-"  
  
"I really do look like shit now," Kachiko laughed.  
  
Wakaba shook her head sadly. "Her sense of humor is intact."  
  
"Regrettably," Sakura agreed.  
  
Finally, Arianna spoke up.  
~The flower she has found for Bosatsu's ease.~  
~Now it is time for my release.~  
  
"Sure thing." Miko removed the hold she had maintained around Arianna's arm the entire time. "You okay? Shoulder's not too bad?"  
  
Arianna sang,  
~A discomfort was your arm.~  
~But it inflicted no lasting harm.~  
  
"Glad to hear it," Miko said, then kicked the faerie in the gut, sending her through the portal. It immediately closed behind her, her wails of terror falling on deaf ears.  
  
"Enjoy the horny dyke," Kachiko said to the lingering sparkles than hung in the air. By the end of her statement, the last of them vanished. Not even a single mote of light remained All was as it was before, save for the destruction caused by the faerie's arrival.  
  
"Here." Kachiko handed Sakura the flower.  
  
She looked at the blossom curiously. "What's this for? I thought you would want to administer it to Bosatsu."  
  
"I need to commune with the pastrami on Neptune. I'm thinking of becoming a Reuben." Kachiko closed her eyes, and all plunged into darkness.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Groggily, Kachiko opened her eyes to see she was in the school infirmary. Then her head informed her of its state, and she wished she had not. "Hangover monster attacked me, didn't it? I lost, didn't I?"  
  
"You're awake."  
  
The headache fled as Kachiko's heart skipped a beat. She turned to the sound of the voice. Her mind could scarcely grasp the fact that Bosatsu was sitting there, looking at her in concern.   
  
Kachiko gave the bishonen boy a loving stare. Hearts all but appeared in her eyes as she said, "You're all right."  
  
"Thanks to you," he admitted. He held a hand to her forehead.   
  
The mere touch sent shivers down Kachiko's spine. Demurely, she said, "It was nothing."  
  
"It was to me," he assured her.  
  
Kachiko gulped as she felt her face blush. The effect he had on her was unbelievable. Never had she been so overwhelmed by the presence of anyone. In an attempt to engage in conversation, she asked. "Have you been sitting there long?"  
  
"Only five hours or so. I came around quickly once the flower was held under my nose. Ever since they told me what had happened to you, I've been waiting, making certain you were all right."  
  
Kachiko was afraid her heart would leap out of her chest. Things couldn't have worked out more perfectly if she had planned it that way at the beginning of the day. The depths of her feelings were expressed to Bosatsu far better than mere words could ever manage. Now with the courage to do what she could not before, Kachiko said, "Anyway, before that big-chested bimbo and oversized insect interrupted me, I was about to ask you out."  
  
Bosatsu suddenly backed away in obvious embarrassment. "I'm sorry, but I can't. I've already agreed to go out with Miko."  
  
Kachiko's jaw nearly hit the floor.  
  
"Oh dear, you're not taking this very well," Bosatsu fretted.   
  
"But... how? Why? When? You said you were here with me."  
  
"She came in while you were asleep and asked me," Bosatsu explained.   
  
"She's a worthless tramp whore!" Kachiko declared.  
  
Bosatsu appeared distraught over the choice of terms. "You're being very judgmental. In the time I've known her, she seems sincere, caring, and very straightforward with her feelings and opinions."  
  
"It's all an act she's using to seduce you!" Kachiko declared.  
  
Bosatsu seemed taken aback by the claim. "If it is an act, I'll discover it for myself. I'm many things, but gullible isn't one of them. But she seemed genuine in her feelings. We'll go out on a date and see how things develop."  
  
Sensing she was losing the fight, Kachiko said, "Well, it's not like you're going steady or anything, so you can date me too."  
  
Bosatsu shook his head. "I'm sorry. I only date one girl at a time. With everything I do, I find my spare time and attention is barely enough for one. I can't imagine what it would be like trying to split it between two girls. And then there's all the potential complications that might arise. No. Only single dating for me."  
  
"But I saved your life. She didn't even try to," Kachiko offered weakly.   
  
The statement caused a shift in Bosatsu's demeanor as it became more firm and perturbed. "Yes, and that was very foolish of you and wise of her. I feel bad enough that you got even a little hurt trying to save me. I'd have never forgiven myself if you had been permanently injured for my sake."  
  
"But I couldn't let you be in a coma forever," Kachiko protested.   
  
"Better that than you being hurt because of me."  
  
"But if our positions were reversed, you would've tried to save me, right?" Kachiko prodded.  
  
Bosatsu nodded. "Of course, but I wouldn't have felt guilty about being hurt for your sake."  
  
"Then why would you expect me to behave differently?"  
  
Bosatsu shrugged. "I guess it's because I care about other people's welfare more than my own. I suppose it is a double standard, but that's just the way I am."  
  
Even now, he was painfully nice. Kachiko felt like crying. It wasn't fair that he was rejecting her. That wasn't the way it was supposed to be. She had risked everything and saved him. He should have been going out with her! "Why are you choosing her over me?"  
  
He gave her a hopeless look. "It's not a competition, and it's not something that can be explained in some statement. Dating isn't about objectivity. Everyone's subjective about what they like. Sometimes they can't put it into words. It's just a feeling."  
  
"It's because she's rich and good-looking, isn't it?" Kachiko accused.  
  
Now the bishonen boy appeared angered at the accusation. "I'll have you know I have turned down both attractive girls and ones that come from families that have money. And I would hardly be so rude as to consider either one criteria for not going out with them. If I accept going out with a girl, it's because I'm either attracted to them or find them interesting, and for no other reason."  
  
"Then you're saying I'm not attractive or interesting!"  
  
Bosatsu shook his head sadly. "No, I find you both. But I personally find Miko more attractive and interesting. I'm sorry, but that's just the way it is." He stood up. "I can see my presence is just agitating you, which is the last thing in the world I wanted to do. I'll be leaving now." He stood up and headed for the door. He paused, and took one last look over his shoulder. "I hope you feel better soon."   
  
Kachiko didn't respond.   
  
Bosatsu gave up and left, closing the door lightly behind him.   
  
Kachiko wiped away the tears that threatened to form in her eyes. She had never cried over a guy before. She wasn't about to start now.   
  
Within a minute, there was a knock on the door. Before Kachiko could snap at the person to go away, Sakura appeared. She waved happily as she closed the door behind her. "Nihao, mi compadre. That's Chinese and Spanish, in case you're wondering. I saw Bosatsu clear out. How did it... Oh god, Kachi, you look terrible."  
  
"Thanks," she said spitefully.   
  
"No, I mean you look depressed," Sakura clarified. "What happened with Bosatsu?"  
  
"I asked him out and he said no. He's going out with super tits."  
  
Sakura looked at the door askance, as though it were the man in question. "But you saved his life. That gutless tramp wasn't even willing to risk her neck for him." Sakura shook her head sadly. "What a creep. I thought he was nice guy. I guess it goes to show you can't judge a book by its cover."  
  
Hearing the same sentiment Kachiko herself had used earlier made the bedridden girl reconsider things. With a sigh, she said, "No, he made the only reasonable choice."  
  
Sakura looked at her in shock. "No, he didn't."  
  
"Yes, he did," Kachiko corrected. "Look, even if all other things are equal, who would you go out with: some guy that was good looking and had money, or one that was plain and didn't?"  
  
Sakura considered that. "Which one's older?"  
  
That made Kachiko roll her eyes. "I said all other things being equal. They're the same age."  
  
"I'd go out with the guy that tried to save me," Sakura stated plainly.  
  
"Even if you didn't want them to risk themselves?"  
  
"Yes, but I want a guy that's willing to disobey me when I secretly want him to. If a guy loves you, he can tell what you really want, even if you don't know yourself."  
  
Kachiko shook her head. "Well, Bosatsu wouldn't. Maybe Miko does know him better. She was right about him feeling guilty about anyone risking themselves for his benefit."  
  
Sakura snorted derisively. "No, it makes him an unrepentant asshole." She flopped herself down on the bed next to Kachiko and placed a comforting arm around her shoulder. "Don't you worry though, you'll always have me at your side."  
  
That was met with a roll of the eyes. "Dogging my steps, harassing me at every turn, constantly telling me when you think I'm wrong."  
  
"Puncturing your inflated ego, cracking the whip on you when you get out of line. That's the plan," Sakura finished.  
  
"I don't deserve a best friend like you," Kachiko said dryly, though with a smile she couldn't hide.  
  
Sakura happily agreed. "That's what I've been telling you since kindergarten. Nice to see you've been paying attention." She saw her statement had the desired effect of making Kachiko smile. Sakura turned a touch more serious as she said, "Don't you worry. I'll be at your side no matter what. Best of friends, to the end."  
  
"What if an older guy comes along and you have to choose between him or me?"  
  
Sakura pretended to consider that. After an exaggerated frown, which made it appear she was constipated, she said, "Fine, even if an older guy comes between us, I'll choose you over him. But that means you'll have to put out for me instead."  
  
Kachiko sat up, picked up her pillow, and beat Sakura in the shoulder with it. "Don't go Yumi on me. It's creepy."  
  
Sakura laughed. "Now that's the Kachiko I know and love, in a platonic, non-Yumi way," she quickly added. She fingered her friend's uneven locks. "What say after you get out of here, we get you a haircut, and then go get really drunk?"  
  
"Sounds like a plan," Kachiko agreed....  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"And?" Ranma asked.  
  
"We got drunk," Kachiko said. She played with her hair a bit. "That's when I decided I liked shorter hair. Until then, I wore it longer."  
  
"Short hair looks better on you," Ranma agreed, thinking of how Akane looked before and after her own hair cut.  
  
Kachiko moved closer in a decidedly seductive manner. "Really?"  
  
Instinctively, Ranma backed away. The resemblance to Akane was deeply unsettling. "I didn't mean it that way."  
  
"I knew that," Kachiko said with only a hint of disappointment. "Anyway, the moral of the story is, you want to take some pretend virtuous high ground, that's fine, but don't think that by doing so you're owed some kind of happy ending. Same thing goes if in the process you screw someone over. Don't expect them to pretend nothing happened. You mess up, you reap the rewards."  
  
"But I don't care if she screwed up and chose the cat over me," Ranma protested. "I mean, I might not like cats, but it's not like I want all of them to drown, even if it would be a lot easier on me."  
  
Kachiko raised an eyebrow at that. "You really don't mind she tossed away your cure?"  
  
Ranma considered the question. "Well, I'd have liked the cure, of course, but I wouldn't want Akane to compromise her morals or do something bad in order to get it for me."  
  
"So you're just like Bosatsu," Kachiko said plainly.  
  
"I am not!" Ranma declared.   
  
Kachiko moved close enough so that she could pinch Ranma's cheeks. Playfully, she said, "Oh yes you are. You're willing to suffer for other people rather than letting them suffer for you. It's one of the reasons I like you soooo much."   
  
Ranma moved out of her grasp. "I just don't want anyone to have to get hurt for my sake."  
  
Kachiko moved back as well, "Ah, but the women that like you might not feel the same way. I have a feeling you're going to be in for a serious disappointment if you get into trouble and someone has to haul your butt out of danger."  
  
"I am not going to end up in any danger," Ranma assured her.   
  
"Of course you won't. I'm sure you've never been in trouble." Kachiko moved back until she was around the corner of the doorway, then out of sight.   
  
Ranma let out a sigh of relief, which quickly died as Kachiko poked her head back around the corner and said, "Let me assure you I do not have such a double standard. If I get into trouble, feel free to bail me out and I will be very, very grateful." She blew him a kiss and left.  
  
Once convinced she had really left, Ranma said, mostly to himself, "She is one screwed up human being." The more he got to know her, the more he realized he didn't understand her at all. Still, it wasn't right for that Bosatsu guy to be so direct and dump her so coldly. He should have let Kachiko down more gently. Actually, he should have gone out with her at least once in appreciation for all she had done. And Kachiko was a nice girl. In some ways. He could tell from the way she had told the tale that she really had liked the guy, and she had been hurt by his blunt refusal. It really helped Ranma to see her in a new, and sympathetic light. He hadn't thought she'd been through something like that. Everything just seemed to slide off her, even being thrown into the present day. But now she had revealed that sometimes it hurt her when things didn't go her way, or her feelings were trampled upon. For perhaps the first time since her arrival, it made Ranma truly empathize with her.  
  
It was too bad for Kachiko she had fallen for such a creep. Had Ranma been in Bosatsu's position, he wasn't sure what he would have done, but it would have been nicer than that. Kachiko, pain though she could be at times, didn't deserve to have her feeling trampled so casually.   
  
And neither did Akane. Ranma hadn't done the trampling, and Kachiko did have her reasons for acting as she did (legitimate or not), but Ranma wasn't her, and not about to hold anything Akane did against her. He went upstairs, determined this time to see to it Akane understood that he not only didn't blame her, but approved of her actions.   
  
As he walked up the stairs, he realized he had several new things to consider.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
End notes: Yes, I played fast and loose with a lot of Western mythos. Hey, they're myths. You just know the 'truth' of them would be corrupted over time.  
  
Next chapter: Nabiki finally hits the breaking point on her mother's birthday and intends to make it one Kachiko is going to remember for a short time to come.  
  
Special thanks to:  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
Michael A. Chase  
Chris Horton 


	11. The Things We Wish For chapter 10

Prologue  
  
Little Nabiki pouted as she watched her mommy giving all of her attention to that darn annoying brat, Akane. Her mommy was bent low, listening to Akane ramble on about something stupid like she was interested, leaving Nabiki to just stand there and fume. It wasn't fair. Nabiki was important too, and her mommy should have spent more time with her. But the bigger Akane grew, (though the brat was still just a baby to four-year old Nabiki) the more attention she seemed to get. Nabiki had thought that going out for a walk with just the three of them (Daddy had taken big sister Kasumi to her friend's home) would net Nabiki with more attention than usual, but no, it was Akane babbling senselessly, her mommy listening intently, and Nabiki being left to her own devices.   
  
They started to cross a bridge over a river running through the district. Nabiki paused at the railing for a moment to look down at the water below. It had rained a lot over the last week, and the river was bigger and a whole lot faster than before. To her little eyes, the effect was very exciting. Even if she couldn't swim, she wasn't afraid of water. Basically a river was like a bathtub, only bigger and faster. It wasn't something to be afraid of. It was neat.  
  
Nabiki tore her eyes away to see neither her Mommy or Akane had realized she stopped to look at the river. They had just continued on, Akane singing some stupid song and Mommy acting as though it sounded neat instead of just plain awful. Nabiki waited for them to say something, but they just continued walking.  
  
That made Nabiki's pout double. Then she came up with a way to gain her mommy's attention. She grabbed onto the lower bars of the railing along the bridge and pulled herself up to the top. She was good at climbing, the best in the neighborhood for her age. She had even climbed up into Mrs. Tanaka's tree just because Matsuo said she couldn't, claiming all girls were bad at climbing. But she had shown him. She challenged him, and he stopped halfway up, while Nabiki made it to the highest branch she could reach. Certainly climbing up a railing with all of its potential and firm handholds was a simple matter.  
  
Within seconds she was standing on the top of the railing. It seemed incredibly wide to Nabiki's tiny feet, nothing at all like the narrow tree branches she had stood on before. It was broad and firm enough to easily stand straight. Looking down, she saw the river yawning below her. Its raging torrent seemed intimidating to Nabiki finally, or it would have if she wasn't so confident in her perch.   
  
She looked back to see that her Mommy and Akane still hadn't realized she had stopped walking with them, and were very far away, almost to the end of the bridge. Intent on reclaiming some of the attention due her, Nabiki shouted out, "Hey, Mommy! Look at me!"  
  
Her mommy turned around. Instantly Nabiki knew she had done something horribly wrong from the look of fright on her mommy's face.   
  
"Nabiki! Don't move!" her mommy shouted.  
  
Reflexively, Nabiki shifted her feet, and her balance, which had been more precarious than the she realized, was lost. She tried falling forward onto the bridge, but instead found herself moving backward. She even tried making circling motions with her arms in an effort to grab onto something, anything, to arrest her fall. But there was nothing, and she continued falling backward until it felt like the railing and disappeared below her feet.  
  
Her tiny heart skipped a beat. She was going to fall into the huge, gaping river, which she could feel wanted to suck her down and drown her, since that was what rivers did to little girls that couldn't swim. There was no way her mommy was going to get to her in time. She was too far away, and already the railing was passing Nabiki's head as she began plummeting farther and farther.  
  
Nabiki was about to reach the bottom of the railing when her mommy's head poked above the railing. Nabiki couldn't understand how it was possible, since she had been too far away. Daddy wasn't able to move that fast, even when he was practicing martial arts. No one should have been that quick.   
  
Her mommy thrust her body out beyond the railing and just barely managed to snag Nabiki's hand, which was still above her trying to reflexively grab onto something. Nabiki's tiny hand found itself completely engulfed in her mommy's larger one. Her body stopped falling, but a shooting pain came from her shoulder at how abruptly her descent had ended. For a moment, Nabiki felt her hand slip slightly from her mommy's grip, but then her mommy cried out louder and in more pain than Nabiki had ever heard, enough to make Nabiki cry because it was obvious she was hurting so much. Even moreso, Nabiki couldn't believe her eyes as the railing her mommy was holding onto to keep from going over herself buckled under the hand.   
  
Nabiki felt the grip on her tiny hand tighten, and she was brought up over the railing and tossed roughly to the ground. She landed firmly on her bottom on the granite that composed the walkway of the bridge. She was in too much shock to cry at the moment, and simply sat there.   
  
And then her shock ended as her mommy fell backward collapsing on the ground and screaming in pain as she clutched her knee. Akane was still standing at the end of the bridge, going from a wide-eyed stare to crying as well, as much from not understanding what was going on to the fact her mommy was crying, meaning it was something incredibly bad.   
  
All of that proved to be too much for little Nabiki, and she broke down, competing with Akane to see who could cry louder.  
  
Though, as her mommy rolled on the ground and continued clutching her limb, Nabiki knew the older woman was crying the hardest of all.  
  
xxxxxxxxxx  
  
Nabiki woke up, drenched in sweat and holding her shoulder. There was no lingering trace of pain, like there had been just a moment before. It took second for her higher brain functions to kick in and remember that it had been a dream, one she hadn't experienced in over five years. That was not a complaint on her part. She hadn't wanted to remember what was easily one of her most traumatic childhood memories. It reminded her of what it meant to be helpless, and at the mercy of others. She would never be that way again.  
  
"And it's that damned Kachi's fault!" Nabiki snarled, remembering all too well the face of the person that had kept her from drowning so many years ago, and that the annoying pest looked so much like her. Something had to be done about the false woman dredging up the past by her mere existence, memories that were made the more bitter by the fact that someone who obviously had nothing but contempt for Nabiki could possibly have anything in common with the woman who would have given everything for her.  
  
xxxxxxxxx  
  
The Things We Wish For...  
  
Chapter 9  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/d_b_sommer/index.html  
  
Or R+C books at:  
  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
  
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident and is with them in the present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Once Nabiki was up and about, she considered what she was going to have to do to alleviate some of the stress and tension caused by that annoying pest who needed to get out of her life yesterday. Bad enough that she acted like she was the real Kachiko Tendou (sort of), but she had the audacity to refuse to acknowledge who her intellectual superior was, and somehow actually manage to outwit Nabiki occasionally. Not often, and Nabiki always gave back more than what she received, but Kachiko just couldn't live without trying to get one up in return.   
  
Unlike Kinnosuke, matching wits with Kachiko wasn't fun. On the contrary, Nabiki actually found herself irritated (bordering on outright anger) every time they butted heads. She couldn't figure out what it was about Kachiko that stirred such an alien reaction in her, an almost pathological need to prove her superiority to someone that was essentially a stranger. Nabiki found herself hating the feeling, and the girl causing it, all the more. And it was not because they were 'so much alike, it's scary' as Ranma stupidly stated yesterday when Nabiki made the mistake of expressing her disdain of their visitor in front of him. Oh, he was going to pay for that insult, once the whole Kachiko matter was taken care of. She'd become his fiancee again and sell him to Azusa, or Mariko or somebody equally distasteful.  
  
The real crux of the problem was Kachiko, though. What the time-lost girl needed was to return to wherever she really came from and leave Nabiki alone. Was it really so wrong for Kachiko to go back to her true home, rather than claiming the Tendou domicile as her own? True, they hadn't found the slightest hint of anything that would allow her to time travel again, but just because there was no way back was no reason to settle in. Especially in a place where Nabiki didn't want her. And it wasn't fair that there were times when Kachiko did sort of remind her of her real mother, usually by some casual reference using a certain phrase or mannerism that triggered the memories left in the distant past. Usually warm and pleasant ones.   
  
But the girl wasn't her mother. Nabiki's mother had liked her, and this annoying pest obviously didn't, which she had made very clear numerous times. She had even overheard Kachiko sucking up to her 'husband' (by cooing over him and calling him 'Soun-chan' repeatedly ) and suggesting that Nabiki was undisciplined and shipping her off to a military academy would be 'for her own good'. That had panicked Nabiki. Her father often caved in to the impostor's demands, and the several times Nabiki had tried exerting her 'daughterly influence' to counteract the insidious spousal suggestions, her father would either side with Kachiko, or break down and cry about how his 'wife and daughter weren't getting along.' At that point both Kachiko and Nabiki would leave in disgust, irritated neither had gotten the upper hand.  
  
Almost as vexing about the attempt at ditching Nabiki at some boarding school (and the sickening feeling at being rejected, even if it was by someone she didn't like) was that Nabiki had been doing some background work on getting her rival committed to an asylum; an easy feat given her claims of being the long-time deceased Kachiko Tendou. That Kachiko had been thinking along similar lines once again made Nabiki seethe in anger. They were not alike!  
  
Pondering the matter worked Nabiki into a frenzy. Her heart was racing and her hand was reflexively forming a fist. She took several calming breaths. Today was Saturday, a day off, and for once she intended to enjoy it, time-lost pain in the ass be damned.   
  
Nabiki finished dressing and left her bedroom, heading toward the kitchen. Like most of the mornings of late, breakfast would be served to the family by Nodoka and Kasumi. Ostensibly, Nodoka was helping Kachiko become more 'motherly.' The reality was the two got along almost as badly as Nabiki did with Kachiko. That at least could be explained because Nodoka represented the last thing Kachiko wanted to be, and the others were trying to turn her into it. It was probably one of the few things that made Nabiki feel even a small degree of sympathy. If Kasumi had tried making Nabiki into some sort of 'traditional girl', she'd balk and be antagonistic, too. But that was where the sympathy ended. Everything else, Kachiko brought upon herself, as far as Nabiki was concerned.  
  
She walked into the living room and saw that everyone else was already seated at the table, eating. The Saotomes sat together on one side, Soun at the head of the table, Kasumi at the foot, and Kachiko and Akane sat on the final side. Nabiki noted they were finally talking to one another again. They had seemed to patch over whatever problem had erupted during the race, something that had kept the pair on edge around one another. However, Nabiki thought she detected some lingering resentment on Akane's part towards their mother. That wasn't really surprising. Kachiko still tried to make passes at Ranma, and that was something Akane never tolerated from any girl for very long. As much as her younger sister might try to deny it, Akane was more territorial about Ranma than the other self-proclaimed fiancees combined. It was a miracle she had held out as long as she had. That Ranma didn't seem to mind the attention (well, he didn't vocalize his irritation over it often, which in his case was the equivalent of not minding it) made it infinitely worse, at least to Akane. However, it appeared even Akane was reaching the end of her rope concerning both Kachiko's come ons and Ranma's lack of complaining about them.  
  
As to Ranma's reaction, once Nabiki considered the situation, she could honestly say she wasn't that surprised. Oh, he still panicked whenever Kachiko overtly made a pass at him, but she wasn't exactly like the other rivals for his affections. She stated quite proudly the limits of her interest (and the implied punishment that would follow should he try to exceed those boundaries), which seemed to ease him somewhat. Ground rules weren't something Ranma was used to. Frequently she didn't make any pass at him at all, which made him somewhat relaxed in her presence. And then there was her admitted attraction to Kunou, which served to entice Ranma. Nothing irritated him more than the implication that he either was undesirable or someone else was better than him. Worse, that it was Kunou who might be more appealing actually made Ranma try to prove himself more charming in Kachiko's eyes, which only served to fuel Akane's irritation at him. Kachiko's obvious similarity to Akane didn't hurt either.  
  
Once Nabiki considered the situation, she would have thought Kachiko was playing Ranma quite well, and actually making some headway with him, or at least keeping him from running away from her at all times, which put her one up on his other romantic interests. Being on the outside, Nabiki could see some things that Kachiko could do to spur his interest further, a tug there, a hint here, a way of going about things subtly (and Ranma was not good at subtlety), and twist him around her finger. But Nabiki never did. Even if she had felt so inclined to help her 'mother' romance Nabiki's supposedly 'future brother-in-law', she doubted Kachiko would accept the advice. The truth, as it appeared to Nabiki's eyes, was that Kachiko wasn't really manipulating anyone (other than in the most superficial, and largely unintentional, way). She was behaving as she would with any guy that piqued her fancy, and Nabiki doubted she would change her manner of 'romance,' as twisted as it was, on anyone else's say-so. It was a sort of honesty, she supposed. Almost contradictory in some ways, just the like the person it involved.  
  
Turning her mind from her mother and to matters of the stomach, Nabiki inventoried the various dishes on the table. The pleasant smell made her stomach grumble in appreciation for the many elaborately prepared servings. One advantage to Nodoka's presence was the increase in good food being offered at the meals. She enjoyed cooking for her family, as well as (most) of the Tendous.  
  
One tray in particularly caught Nabiki's eyes. "Fortune cookies?"  
  
"For dessert. Mother made them herself," Kasumi said in such glowing terms one would have thought Kachiko had just painted the Sistine Chapel.  
  
"I decided to pitch in," Kachiko explained.   
  
"Cold gruel would have been more appropriate," Nodoka commented dryly.  
  
"I can fix you some." Kachiko smiled back in a decided non-friendly way.  
  
"Why don't we eat?" Kasumi suggested, instantly defusing the situation.  
  
Everyone heartily dug in. In less than fifteen minutes, the majority of the food had been eaten, and matters were coming to a close.   
  
Just as Nabiki was about to rise and excuse herself, Kachiko said, "Good news, everyone. Today is the most important day of the year."  
  
"You're declaring your engagement to Father?" Kasumi asked.  
  
Kachiko's mood instantly soured. She picked up several plates (including the one Ranma was still eating from), stacking them upon one another, and handed them to Kasumi. "Wash these."  
  
Crestfallen at having guessed wrongly, Kasumi accepted the rebuke and went to wash the dishes.  
  
Once Kasumi had departed the room, Kachiko explained. "It's my birthday."  
  
"I knew that," Soun said happily. "It was one of your favorite times of the year. You always enjoyed receiving presents."  
  
"And I still do," Kachiko added. "Which is to say, it would be really nice if people were to give me presents, since it's my birthday and everything."  
  
"What would you like?" Akane asked.  
  
Kachiko was practically glowing. "I don't know. Something expensive that I don't have a use for."  
  
"I'll sign you up for chemotherapy," Nabiki said.  
  
Kachiko shot another of her unfriendly smiles toward Nabiki. She picked up the tray of fortune cookies. "Anyway, why don't we have the fortune cookies for dessert?" She looked them over careful, then picked one up. "This is for Akane."  
  
Akane accepted the cookie.   
  
Kasumi reentered the room as Kachiko continued handing out the cookies. "This is for Mr. Saotome. And this is for Ranma." She gave him a sly wink. "And this is for the old woman."   
  
Nodoka shot her an evil glare.   
  
She quickly finished handing them out.  
  
"Mine has tape on it," Nabiki observed.   
  
"It was hard getting those messages in there," Kachiko explained.  
  
Akane cracked hers open. "Mine says, 'Clothing makes a fine gift for those that brought you into this world'." She scratched her head.  
  
Nodoka read, "Mine says, 'Try not to drag others into the depths of misery and depression your pointless life has mired you in." The paper crumpled in Nodoka's hands as one of her eyebrows began twitching fiercely.  
  
Kasumi opened hers. "'Do not try to make others into becoming what they are not.' What sound advice. Perhaps we should discuss it while we clean the house and do the laundry, Mother."  
  
Kachiko's head thumped against the table.  
  
Nabiki rolled her eyes as she read hers. "Repent your mercenary ways. The only path to absolution is to give your ill-gotten gains to those that brought you into this world. Cash always makes an acceptable birthday present as well'."  
  
Soun was nearly crying as tears filled his eyes. "'You should ask someone that recently came into your life out on a date'."  
  
Kachiko made a strangled sound. "No! That was Ranma's cookie, not yours."  
  
Soun would hear none of it as he grasped Kachiko, who desperately tried worming her way out of his hold and failed miserably.  
  
"So I probably shouldn't follow the advice on mine about 'Leaving sweet women that are too young for you alone, Old Letch'?" Ranma said. He turned to his father. "What did yours say, Pop?"  
  
"My what say?" Genma asked.  
  
"Your fortune?"  
  
"I must have ate it." Something crinkled in his mouth.  
  
"I'm sorry I didn't do that to mine," Nabiki said dryly.  
  
"Enough!" Kachiko declared, whacking Soun in the head with the nearest vase in easy reach and freeing herself.  
  
Nabiki made a show of crumpling up her paper and tossing it in Kachiko's direction. "Tell you what, you get me something 'Expensive that I don't need' for my birthday, and we'll talk about getting something for yours." She rose to her feet, only to find Kachiko already there, smiling pleasantly. Nabiki found that smile far more disturbing than the insincere one. "What?"  
  
"Nothing. I was just getting up to help with the dishes," Kachiko said, waving a pamphlet in front of her and whistling nonchalantly.  
  
"What's that?" Nabiki asked, then caught sight of the heading on it. 'C. Fodder Military Academy, Where We Make Boys Into Men, And The Women As Well.'  
  
Kachiko stared at the pamphlet, as though she was seeing it for the first time. "Oh, this? It's something I've been pondering for someone that might need a little discipline in her life to straighten herself up. Of course, if I was to have some expensive bauble that caught my attention, why, I'd probably forget this pamphlet ever existed." She waved it back and forth again.  
  
Nabiki shot Kachiko a heavy-lidded glare. She knew she should have moved faster on the asylum idea. Now it would have to be temporarily derailed while she parried Kachiko's latest thrust.   
  
"I need to go out shopping," Nabiki said disgustedly.  
  
"Good luck," Kachiko said. Anything further was cut off as Soun attached himself to her again and suggested they go to a movie together, Kachiko's wails drowning out the rest.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Nabiki continued strolling randomly throughout Nerima and the surrounding districts. She hadn't found anything yet she could bring herself to buy for her 'mother'. She had seen plenty of appropriate things, but gifts like dead fish or one-way tickets to Antarctica would probably have Nabiki saluting a commandant before the ink on her transfer papers dried.  
  
For the fifth time in the hour Nabiki cursed the day Kachiko Tendou came into her life. Kasumi and Akane didn't have to put up with the girl's crap the way she did. It was like Kachiko saw her as some sort of rival and just had to go out of her way to torment her until Nabiki admitted Kachiko was the better girl. Hell would sooner freeze over than that happening. No one messed with Nabiki Tendou, and if they did, they paid for it. Mother or not, (and she wasn't) Kachiko needed to be put out of Nabiki's misery by whatever means possible. And no matter what happened, the girl brought it on herself for the endless harassment and being driven to whatever extreme was necessary to win.  
  
Nabiki was still lost in thought when she realized how dry her mouth was. She had not drank anything since breakfast. She looked around, trying to locate a café or vending machine when she noticed the name of the store she was standing in front of.  
  
"Hmm. Now this has potential," Nabiki said to herself as she entered the 'Cursed Antique Shoppe.'  
  
The door closed behind Nabiki, the bell sitting on the top of the door jingling loudly enough to wake the dead, as well as the wizened shopkeeper running the store. He was an old, stooped over man that wore a set of plain clothing that had musty odor, like the one that had assailed her when she entered the business. His only unusual characteristics were a pair of horn rimmed glasses that sat on his nose and the brightly colored bandanna on his head, similar to the way Genma wore his. He was appropriately friendly as he asked, "How can I help you, Miss?"  
  
Nabiki feigned only a casual interest. "I'm just wandering around, looking for a birthday present."  
  
The man scratched his bandanna clad head. "Hmm. Can't say as I've seen any birthday presents lately. Have you tried the fabrics store? They have wrapping paper there, and it might be hidden among them."  
  
"I meant I want to buy one from you," Nabiki clarified, and began rethinking her strategy.  
  
"Oh, I have lots of things you can give for a birthday." The shopkeeper went over to a number of statues sitting on a shelf. He picked one in the shape of a frog up. "Magic statues are popular. This is one of a Frog Prince. Place it in a swamp, and it will come to life, transforming into a prince. That is to say, he'll look like a prince, but still be a frog in mentality, eating flies and hopping around. Well, assuming if you believe such nonsense, which I don't, mind you."  
  
Nabiki considered that. No, Kachiko was fixated on Ranma and Kunou. Worse, she might try to pawn the frog princeling off on Nabiki, using the excuse that her daughter 'needed a man to settle her down.' She shook her head.  
  
Seeing the lack of interest, the owner indicated several evil-looking, brightly dressed, knee high statues. "Lawn gnomes? They'll come to life during a full moon and try to kill you. You could do a movie about it. Horror movies are making a comeback."  
  
"A movie about evil homicidal lawn gnomes? Don't be ridiculous," Nabiki snorted. "I'm thinking of something smaller. Ideally, something that will convince an unwanted person to go away and never come back."  
  
"You should try mace," the man suggested.   
  
Nabiki shook her head. "No, conventional attacks wouldn't work."  
  
The proprietor placed his hand to his chin in thought. "Hmm. Go away and never come back? I think I have the ideal item for you." He led Nabiki through several aisles, finally stopping and walking down one whose floorboards were covered in a thick sheath of dust. The man walked down the aisle, kicking up clouds of it with each footfall and forcing Nabiki to place a handkerchief over her mouth so she could breathe.  
  
At last he bent down to the bottom shelf and pulled out an item. It appeared to be an hourglass, with wooden trim around its edges and two wooden shafts running up and down to help transport it. An unusual blue sand lined the bottom of it. The item was about the length of Nabiki's forearm, and by her estimate, could hold about two hours worth of sand. He held it up for Nabiki to get a closer look.  
  
"Seems pretty mundane," Nabiki commented.   
  
"Ah, but it's ideal for what you want. You see, this hourglass is special. It'll measure the days of our lives."  
  
"That's a pretty bad turn of the phrase."  
  
"But accurate." The proprietor assured her. "Turn it over, and that's how much time you'll have left."  
  
Nabiki's eyebrow cocked quizzically. "Time you have left?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Which means?"  
  
"Exactly what it says."  
  
"But it doesn't explain anything."  
  
The proprietor shook his head. "If you want someone to go away, this will insure that they depart by the time the sands reach the bottom. Give it to them, have them turn it over, and when the sands run out of time, so do they. Assuming you believe such nonsense."  
  
"Which you don't, mind you," Nabiki finished for him. "Why doesn't someone just turn it over when it's almost out and get more time?"  
  
The old man shook his head. "If it was that simple, it wouldn't be much of a cursed item. It'll keep right on flowing until it's out, or you give it to someone else who willing accepts it and turns it over. Then it'll adjust to the new owner and it'll be their time to run out instead of the person that originally turned it over."  
  
Now that had potential. Satisfied, Nabiki said, "I'll take it."  
  
The proprietor seemed to reconsider things. "Maybe I shouldn't sell it. It is potentially dangerous. No, I couldn't sell it to you even if you hit me in the head with a wad of cash."  
  
"How about if I place fifteen thousand yen in your hand?"  
  
"That'll work."  
  
She placed the money in his open palm. "And gift wrap it."  
  
The proprietor went in back of the shop, then returned several moments later with an hourglass shaped object wrapped in tasteful green paper. He even placed a large pink bow right in the middle of it .  
  
Nabiki admired the item as she held it in her hands. This was the solution to all her problems. Then something occurred to her. "Wait, what if, by chance, I was to drop it and it broke?"  
  
"All the sand will have run its course. Then you're out of time immediately, so be careful."  
  
"I will." Nabiki assured him. She was going straight home and giving her mother the birthday gift she wanted so badly. Two hours or so later, Kachiko would be out of time, whatever that meant. All Nabiki really knew was that it sounded good. Maybe Kachiko would have to go back to her proper time, where she belonged. As far as Nabiki was concerned, the annoyance had run out of time a while ago. About five minutes after she arrived, to be specific.  
  
As she strolled down the street, her step lighter than it had been in days, Nabiki considered how to give it to her mother so as not to arouse suspicion. The most direct method would be simply to hand it to her and let whatever came afterwards take its natural course. She was rehearsing what to say in her mind when a child on a skateboard zoomed past at a dangerous speed. Nabiki barely had time to dodge out of the youth's way and keep him from slamming into her. As she moved backward, her heel hit a crack in the sidewalk and she lost her footing. Reflexively she brought her hands out to break her fall, and in the process, released her grip on her present.  
  
A gasp escaped her lips as her body froze as the wrapped gift tumbled toward the ground. She was so distracted that she stopped trying to break her fall, and instead landed solidly on the concrete. Despite falling hard on her shoulder, the pain was nothing compared to the terror as she saw the present impact with the street.  
  
Luck was with Nabiki as it landed upright on the one of its flat surfaces rather than the side, where it would surely have broken.   
  
Nabiki let out a sigh of relief. "That was close." Her hand almost closed on the top when something occurred to her. What if she wasn't going for the top, but rather the bottom?  
  
She reexamined the present. The bow had been wrapped around the middle, and the wrapping paper was perfectly symmetrical. It was impossible to tell which side had previously been the top.   
  
Nabiki began sweating. What if it had flipped over while in mid-air? Upon thinking about it, she was fairly certain it had at least a couple of times. What if right now it was her time that was running out as the sands trickled through the neck of the hourglass? Of course it might be paranoia. Nothing really bad ever happened to her. To Ranma, yes. To his opponents, certainly. To his fiancees, sometimes worse. Even to Akane, sometimes, bad things happened. But not to Nabiki Tendou. She was smarter than that.   
  
"I should just give it to Kachi as is and not worry about it. I'll give it to her, she'll turn it over, and I'll have nothing to worry about," Nabiki said to herself.   
  
Of course, Kachiko might not be at home, and there hadn't been a great deal of sand in the hourglass to begin with. If she wasn't there, Nabiki would have to find her. Maybe quickly. It wasn't a large hourglass, and Kachiko was nearly impossible to track down at times. How much time would be enough?  
  
Nabiki tore at her hair in uncharacteristic frustration. Unable to live with the lack of knowledge concerning her fate, she tore off the wrapping paper with maniacal fervor. Once the last shred of green gift wrap was free of the ancient timepiece, she saw what had happened.   
  
The sands flowed from top to bottom. Already it had formed an unpleasantly large pile in the lower portion of the hourglass.   
  
"Oh, crap," Nabiki lamented.   
  
Her cell phone rang. Absent-mindedly she pulled it from within her pocket and opened the mouthpiece. "Hello?"  
  
A female voice, ancient in tone to the point it was almost unrecognizable as coming from a human, croaked out, "You have seven days left."  
  
"AHHH!" Nabiki screamed at the top of her lungs, holding the phone away from her, as though it was a dangerous viper that had sank its fangs into her cheek and its poison now traveled through her bloodstream. Her ears pounded with the jackhammering of her heart and made her deaf to the world around her for a split second.   
  
The same female voice, now much more clearly and youthful, shouted out from the phone, "Hey, Nabiki! Nabiki! I'm just screwing around!"  
  
It took Nabiki a moment to process what was being said. The voice sounded familiar. She brought the phone back up to her ear and asked, "Ryonami?"  
  
"Yeah, it's me. Geez, you really freaked there."  
  
Nabiki felt a surge of relief as her heart jumped back into her chest and she calmed down. Fast on its heels was a chiding cry of, "What the hell do you think you were doing?!"  
  
The voice, now somewhat contrite, said, "I just wanted to mess around with you, like in 'The Ring'. I didn't think you'd actually get scared or I wouldn't have done it."  
  
"It wasn't funny." Nabiki's tone carried a promise of revenge at a later time of her convenience. "Did you call me up solely to try rattling my cage?"  
  
Voice now oozing repentance, Ryonami said, "No, I called to see if you wanted to go to a movie today. I got free movie passes from one of the friends of my father who works there. And since it's Saturday and everything, I thought you might like to go."  
  
That settled Nabiki further. It was nice for someone to ask her to do something normal for a change. "I might be able to. Is it only for this afternoon, or does it include evening shows as well?"  
  
A finger tapped her on the shoulder, nearly making her miss Ryonami saying, "It's good for any time in the next two weeks."  
  
"I see. What's playing now?"   
  
The finger tapped her shoulder again.  
  
"Depends on what you're in the mood for. There was this foreign picture that's supposed to be good. It has that comedic genius-"  
  
Nabiki didn't bother turning around as she held her hand over the mouthpiece and snapped at the insistent tapper, "Would you cut that out?!" She removed her hand and said, "Would you repeat that, Ryonami?"  
  
"I said I was thinking of an American picture, one with that funny Pauly Shore guy."  
  
"I---" Nabiki found her mouth go dry as from over her shoulder appeared a long arm, shrouded in a voluminous black sleeve. A hand poked out of the end, bearing an hourglass identical to the one Nabiki carried, save for the fact it was smaller. Sand was running from the mostly full top rapidly filling the bottom.   
  
Softly, Nabiki said, "Something's come up. I don't think I'll be making it to the movie tonight." And hung up.   
  
Slowly, inexorably, Nabiki turned around to see what the owner of the arm looked like.  
  
He was tall and Japanese, of indiscriminate age due to his plain features, ghostly pallor, and lack of any facial hair. He wore a plain black robe, similar to a monk's. In one hand he bore the miniature hourglass, in the other, a long scythe that was nearly twice as tall as Nabiki.   
  
"AHHHH!" Nabiki screamed at the top of her lungs and drew back.  
  
"AHHHH!" the shrouded figure screamed at the top of his lungs and drew back.  
  
Their identical movement caused a momentary confusion between the pair. Each managed to catch their breath, and regain some of their composure.  
  
"Don't scare me like that!" the man stated.  
  
"Who are you?" Nabiki got out through her gasps.  
  
Now much more composed, the man held the scythe in the crook of his arm and placed a hand inside his robe. A moment later, he came out with a small card and held it out for Nabiki.  
  
Reluctantly, she accepted the card. On it in gold enameled writing were the words, 'Shin I. Gami: Professional Usherer of Travelers to Far Off Destinations.'  
  
"You're a spirit of death!" Nabiki gasped out.  
  
Shin appeared offended at both the words and tone. "That's 'Professional Usherer' thank you very much. We Usherers are a bit testy about that rather insensitive 'death' title. It's insulting and demeaning. 'Usherer' is much nicer and more appropriate," he explained.   
  
Nabiki said, "But you look like how those Western pictures depict you, rather than Japanese ones."  
  
Shin fingered his robe. "Ah, yes, the clothing. Just came back from Norway. They really are morbid people. Everything is drab and gray there. It's only professional that I dress for the role they want me to. I was on my way home to change into something a little more traditional, but then you called me, so I hurried on over."  
  
"Oh, well, there's been a mistake. I didn't mean to call you. It was an accident, so, good-bye." Nabiki tried waving him away.  
  
Shin shook his head. "Now, now. If getting out of it was that easy, the 'Time's Up Hourglass' wouldn't be much of a cursed item, now would it?"  
  
"But it's was originally meant for someone else," Nabiki complained.  
  
"Yes, it usually is. I can't remember when that thing was successfully given to its intended target. Another negative effect of the curse." Shin deftly twirled the tiny hourglass in his fingers as he spoke.  
  
The movement caught Nabiki's eye. She pointed at it. "What's with that thing?"   
  
Shin stopped twirling the hourglass and eyed it as though seeing it for the first time. "Oh, this? It's your personal timepiece. Every living thing has one. It starts the moment you're born and ends when it's time for you to be 'ushered'. For instance."   
  
Shin pointed to a child, no more than five years old, walking at the end of the street. The spirit then pulled a different hourglass out from his robes. Holding it up, Nabiki saw it was the same size as hers, though the amount of sand in the top was greater, and the speed with which the sand flowed considerably slower.  
  
He placed that hourglass back into his robes, then pointed at a fly that was buzzing around Nabiki's head. "Now for that little fellow. He pulled out another hourglass. Again, it was the same size as Nabiki's however, it was almost empty at the top, and the sand flowed far faster. In less than a handful of seconds, the sand ran out.   
  
Shin looked at it in surprise. "Oh." He placed the hourglass back in his robes, then reached forward and slapped his hands together, catching the fly in-between. He looked at his hands and gave a satisfied grin. "That takes care of that." He wiped his palms off on his robes.   
  
Nabiki watched everything transpire with rapt horror. "It's not fair. Why is mine faster than that kid's?"  
  
"You speeded it up when you flipped over the 'Time's Up' hourglass. That's its power. It substitutes itself for your actual time piece. If you give the hourglass to someone else, and they willingly accept it and turn it over, your time will not just go back to normal, but it'll slow its flow down until it's back in synchronicity with your original amount of time left, then it returns to its normal flow. Theoretically."  
  
"Theoretically?" Nabiki said,  
  
Hesitantly Shin said, "Well, you see, no one's that's ever gotten their hands on the Hourglass has actually been able to successfully pawn it off on someone else before their time was up. It wouldn't be much of a cursed item if it was easy to ditch it onto someone else, now would it?"  
  
Nabiki panicked. This was for real. She needed to give the hourglass to her mother before it was too late. Knowing better than to stand there and argue with Death while her life flew away, Nabiki spun on her heel and raced in the direction of her home, praying Kachiko would be present.  
  
She had barely made it halfway there when she realized she was not alone. "Why are you following me?!" she shouted at Shin.  
  
"Can't very well take you to where you have to go if I'm not there to usher you, now can I?"  
  
"You'll ruin everything if you're around!" Nabiki shouted, and tried running faster in an effort to lose him.  
  
The Usherer effortlessly kept up, not even breathing hard. It appeared he was gliding across the ground rather than running, and with the way the robes covered his legs, it made for a very disturbing effect. Nabiki tried running through crowds, but again Shin just seemed to flow around people, who barely took notice of him.  
  
By the time Nabiki stopped outside her home, she saw the spirit was still with her, waiting patiently. Truly Death was an inexorable thing. And quick on its feet, too.  
  
Nabiki composed herself, it wouldn't do to give her intentions away at this point. Kachiko did have a fairly well honed survival instinct. If even half the tales of her youth were true, she would have been dead long before she spawned three children otherwise. At this point, she was Nabiki's only hope for survival.   
  
For a second, a stab of guilt pierced Nabiki's conscience. Deep down inside, when she had first bought the hourglass, she figured it either wouldn't work correctly or that someone's 'time being up' meant they would have to leave. She didn't really think it meant they would drop over dead. But the presence of Shin meant any such illusions were hopelessly dashed. When the hourglass ran dry, it would be all over for her. And she would never have purchased the item in the first place if Kachiko wasn't so damned manipulative and went out of her way to harass someone that was supposed to be her daughter. What kind of a mother was she really when she was constantly trying to one up someone she should have been friends with and helping in the way parents were supposed to? It was all Kachiko's fault, not Nabiki's.  
  
Besides, the time-lost girl was resourceful. She would figure some way out of the whole problem with the hourglass and not be the worse for it. She had survived everything else. This wouldn't be anything different from all those other times. She was better equipped to deal with spirits of death, usherers, or whatever the shinigami wanted to call itself. And there wasn't even any proof Shin could do what he claimed, and it might all be a hoax or something. Most of those other cursed items from the store never worked like they were supposed to, or at least as they implied. Kunou's little problem with the phoenix on his head was proof of that. Just because Kachiko had the hourglass, didn't mean it would be the end of her. Nabiki would even help her get free of the item's curse in whatever way possible (except taking it back), just to show there were no hard feelings.   
  
Realizing that standing around and thinking was making things worse as the sands of her life were quickly running out, Nabiki ran into the house and shouted, "Kachi, are you here?! I have your present for you!" If she wasn't home, Nabiki was dead. She didn't have enough time to find her. Not with the rate at which the sand in her personal hourglass was flowing.  
  
Nabiki's heart skipped a beat as she heard a voice from the living room call out, "I'm in here!" Nabiki ran at top speed, entering the room with the spirit hot on her heels.   
  
Kachiko turned her attention from the television set and to her nominal daughter. "Goody. I've been waiting for my presents. Everyone else went out to get them, or at least I assume they did. But you're the first one back. Now, this had better be good." Kachiko suddenly seemed to take notice of the man traveling at Nabiki's side. "Who's this?"  
  
"Shin. His name is Shin," Nabiki blurted out before Shin ruined everything by explaining what he was and why he was hanging around.  
  
"So who is he?" Kachiko pressed on.  
  
"New boyfriend," Nabiki said hurriedly.  
  
Kachiko examined him closely. "Got that whole, 'Grim Reaper' look going, doesn't he?"  
  
"What can I say? He's a Goth."   
  
Kachiko stared at him warily. "Are you sure you're ready to get involved with someone like this?"  
  
"I am not that bad!" Nabiki shouted.  
  
Kachiko looked at her askance. "Actually, I was asking you. I was just looking him over to make sure he was for real," she explained. "But you're right. It's none of my business who you get involved with. Do what you want, as long as it makes you happy." She looked Shin over again. "You've probably got body piercings in unmentionable parts of your body, don't you? Tattoos aren't so bad, I think they're kind of neat. It's that whole poking holes in you and sticking chunks of metal in that freaks me out."  
  
Shin shook his head. "Afraid I don't have either one. I'm sort of plain, all things considered. I'm not one of those weirdo demon type Usherers that go in for that whole gruesome thing. Some of them enjoy freaking folks out."  
  
"An usher? So you're in the movie industry?"  
  
While Kachiko and Shin continued conversing, Nabiki found herself at a loss. Kachiko had shown actual concern for her well being, and was actually grilling her 'boyfriend' to make sure he was all right and acceptable for Nabiki to date. Worse, there was something horribly familiar about the attitude. It was almost protective, and no one was ever protective of Nabiki. Again her conscience stabbed at her, trying to make her turn away from her course of action. But she needed to hand off the hourglass before it was too late. She could practically feel the icy hand of Death on her shoulder.   
  
Then she realized it was the icy hand of Death on her shoulder.   
  
"We do make a cute couple, don't we?" Shin said, as he squeezed Nabiki affectionately.   
  
"Don't do that!" Nabiki yelped, darting out from under his clammy grasp.  
  
Kachiko stared at him in disapproval. It appeared she was about to reprimand him when her eyes lighted up. She turned her attention toward Nabiki. "You said something about my present. Is that it?" She pointed at the hourglass in Nabiki's hand.  
  
Nabiki's voice suddenly gave out on her.  
  
"She purchased it just for you," Shin assured Kachiko, then gave Nabiki a sly wink and an 'okay' sign with his hand.  
  
Kachiko moved closer. "Let me see it."   
  
Nabiki didn't move. She tried to make her arm rise up, but for some reason, her muscles refused to respond. Oddly, she didn't feel concerned about her body's betrayal, one that would result in her premature demise.  
  
When it became obvious Nabiki was just going to stand there, Kachiko reached down and grabbed the item by one of the wooden grips. She tried pulling it away from Nabiki, but the girl refused to let go. Kachiko tried tugging, but Nabiki tightened her grip and tried pulling it the other way.  
  
"I thought this was my present," Kachiko snarled out.  
  
Shin prodded Nabiki. "Yes, I thought the whole point of coming here was so that you could give this girl that hourglass and have her turn it over."  
  
"No! You can't have it!" Nabiki shouted, resisting Kachiko's pulling with all her might.  
  
"I want my present!" Kachiko snarled, and began to exert some true force.   
  
Nabiki felt herself losing the tug-of-war. Through eyes that were now rimmed with tears, she exclaimed, "You can't have it because it's cursed! If I give it to you it'll make you die again, Mommy!"  
  
Kachiko released her grip on the item. Lacking any form of resistance, Nabiki fell backward, landing hard on her bottom. Luckily, she brought the hourglass into her body as it fell, and it suffered no damage. She might not have had much time left, but it was better than losing it all at once.  
  
Kachiko stared down at the girl with a decidedly disapproving glare. "I think you have some explaining to do."  
  
Nabiki did so, crying the whole time as she understood that her conscience had finally betrayed her, though it refused to reconsider its course of action, informing her that some fates were worse than death, and killing her mother was one of them. Nabiki's fate was sealed and there was nothing she could do to stop the inevitable.   
  
Kachiko did not seem quite convinced. She turned to Shin. "Is this whole thing legit, or is she trying to set me up for yet another one of her stupid money grubbing schemes?"  
  
"I'll show you." Shin pulled out Nabiki's hourglass, and one from someone else. "Note the way hers travels much faster than a normal person's." He replaced the other one back into his robes, but kept Nabiki's ever dwindling one out for everyone to mark its progress.  
  
Kachiko turned a disapproving glare towards the sitting girl. "I think this is one of those rare occasions when I have the opportunity to quote Sakura, 'This is a fine mess you've gotten yourself into.' I have to admit, it's sort of neat hearing it applied to someone other than me." Kachiko snickered.  
  
"How can you be so happy about it?" Nabiki sobbed.  
  
Kachiko moved closer and patted Nabiki's head. "It's not often I get the opportunity to rub someone's blatant stupidity in their face. Usually it's the other way around, though it's never as bad as everyone acts," Kachiko said defensively.  
  
Nabiki's head nearly struck the floor in shame. "You're right. I was stupid, and deserve this."  
  
Kachiko nodded her head sagely. "A smart person knows when to admit they're wrong. It's nice to see you're learning."  
  
"Stop being so smug about it!" Nabiki snapped from her sitting position on the floor.  
  
Kachiko sighed dramatically. "However, since you did buy it for me, it really is mine, not yours, so give me." She reached down and tried pulling the hourglass away from Nabiki's grasp.  
  
Nabiki barely had time to tighten her hold on it. "No! We just went over this! You can't have it!"  
  
Kachiko kept tugging. Through gritted teeth, she snarled, "It's my birthday, it's my birthday gift. I want it, even if it's cursed."  
  
"No!"  
  
Kachiko finally decided things by planting a foot lighting quick into Nabiki's midsection, kicking it slightly. Reflexively, Nabiki clutched her middle as she was left grasping for air. Prepared for the release of tension, Kachiko easily came away with her prize. She turned to Shin and unleashed a satisfied grin. "I do believe this is mine now."  
  
"Indeed," Shin agreed.   
  
"Stop her," Nabiki gasped out and tried to lunge for Kachiko's feet.  
  
The time-lost girl easily darted out of the attempt. "And now I'll turn it over." Without hesitation, Kachiko did so.  
  
In response, the sand from Nabiki's hourglass stopped instantly. Shin said, "It'll actually kick out a granule every month or so until she ages to the appropriate time, at which point it will return to normal."  
  
"Nooo!" Nabiki wailed, realizing her mother had just given her life for her. It wasn't fair. She shouldn't have had to die twice. It was all Nabiki's fault this time. There was no way she could live with the shame. Better she died a hundred times than live through the horror of her mother dying again.  
  
"Would you relax," Kachiko said to the wailing girl. "I'm going to return it to you."  
  
Nabiki was momentarily taken aback. She wiped her face with her sleeve, an old habit she hadn't engaged in for years. "What do you mean?"  
  
Kachiko rolled her eyes. "Get real. I have no intention of dying. The way I got it figured, we'll just keep passing it back and forth, resetting it each time until we figure how to get rid of it altogether. Maybe we can pawn it off on Bull-Butt as a birthday gift for him." A look of consideration dawned on Kachiko's face.  
  
"Why, that's brilliant. I'm surprised I didn't think of it," Nabiki admitted. "But we'll have to be careful we don't forget to switch it before one of us runs out of time. I think we should hand it off at the halfway point, just to not cut things too close."  
  
Shin cleared his throat, gaining the girls' attention. "Ah, it's not that simple. You see, if you had the Time's Up Hourglass once, then get it back, it'll pick up where it left off rather that restarting at the beginning, like it would with a new holder. It wouldn't be much of a curse-"  
  
"--if you could get out of it that easily," Nabiki finished dryly.  
  
Kachiko's eyes widened so that they nearly fell out of her head. To Shin she shouted, "What?! Why didn't you explain that in the first place? I wouldn't have grabbed it if it wasn't going to do any good."  
  
"You didn't ask," Shin pointed out. "Besides, it's never actually come up since no one's ever been able to unload it before their time was up." To Nabiki, he said, "Congratulations! You've already made it farther than anyone else. All you have to do is not accept it back, no one can force you to take it, and you'll be fine."  
  
Nabiki released a sigh full of resolve. "Don't be stupid. I'm not letting her die for me." She held out her hand to Kachiko. "Give it back. It's my fault we're in this mess."  
  
Kachiko's eyes darted back and forth between proffered hand and hourglass. "Hold on, you'll still be screwed if I give it back to you. Let's think things through."  
  
"We can think while I have it," Nabiki said.  
  
"And I said no," Kachiko stated firmly.  
  
"Give it back!" Nabiki tried snatching it from Kachiko's grasp, but instead found herself shoved rudely back by her mother, knocking her onto her butt.  
  
"You're not getting it, so knock it off!" Kachiko warned. She said to Shin, "Let me see my hourglass. I want to get a full grasp of the situation."  
  
Doing as he was asked, Shin returned Nabiki's hourglass to his robes and pulled out Kachiko's. "Here's yours. You can see it's moving very quick..." he trailed off and took a closer look, staring at the glass in confusion. "This is most peculiar. According to this, your time ran out a long while ago and you're already dead. I can't recall this happening before." He scratched his hooded head.   
  
Kachiko went from a wide-eyed look of surprise to one of sly cunning. "So, since you say I'm out of time already, then I don't have any left to lose, that means I can do this!" She raised the hourglass above her head, then threw it into the floor. The glass shattered into a hundred tiny fragments, the sands spilling out across the floor.   
  
Shin stared at the shattered remains almost mournfully. "This is true. I can only take you the moment you run out of time. If you've already run out before I came along, I don't really have the authority to take you anywhere. Our job is to usher the living, not the already dead. It would be kind of silly to do the same work twice. That is unless you want to go?" he asked hopefully.  
  
Kachiko shook her head. "I don't think so. Kicking the bucket once is enough for anyone. Even if you only discover it after the fact."  
  
"Most unusual," Shin said mostly to himself. "Ah well, my job here is done." To Nabiki, he said, "Be seeing you in," he pulled out her personal hourglass again and stared at it. "Forty-eight years, nine months, seventeen days, thirty five minutes, and," He tapped the side. "Twenty-two seconds. Unless you speed things along magically, in which case I'll see you sooner. So long, but not good-bye." He waved to the girls, then let himself out.  
  
Once he was gone, Nabiki was left to stare in awe at her mother, uncertain what to say. She wasn't even sure of what she felt. Her mind had simply seized up upon discovering something that was completely incomprehensible. It took several moments for the reality of the situation, as impossible as it was, begin to settle in. Nabiki saw Kachiko in a new light. No one would have gone to such lengths to risk so much to save her. Nobody. "I can't believe you did that."  
  
"Neither can I!" Kachiko said, the reality of the situation settling in on her in an entirely different way. "I could have died just there! Again, even if it was for the first time from my perspective! And for your worthless, manipulative, sorry behind. What was I thinking? What sort of temporary insanity was I suffering from?!" Kachiko began banging her head against a wall.  
  
"I don't know, but it sounds like you're over it," Nabiki said dryly at the very... descriptive terms her mother was using in characterizing her.  
  
The head pounding stopped. With a combination of veins popping out of her forehead and her eyebrows twitching, Kachiko turned fully toward Nabiki. Her hands curled into fists as she stalked toward the girl. "You do still have to pay for what you tried to do. I mean really, killing your mother on her birthday? You have no sense of shame, do you?"  
  
Sensing this was no bluff, Nabiki began to back away. "I tried to save you. I wouldn't let you have it. You had to beat me up and tear it away from me, and then you refused to give it to me again when we found out you were in trouble."  
  
"Ha! Using the facts as a defense never worked for me, so I can guarantee it has no chance of saving you." Kachiko cracked her knuckles. "Time to show what happens to little girls who try to make Mommy suck eggs."  
  
Nabiki turned and tried to flee, but a hand snagged the back of her shirt before she could make it out of the room and prevented her from going anywhere.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane rapped hard on Nabiki's door again, coming close to pounding on it. "Come on. We're going to open Mom's presents and serve the cake." Now that Akane thought about it, her family had always seemed to have a thing for Western celebrations concerning birthdays, rather than more traditional Japanese ones. When pressed, her father said something about after they were first married, Kachiko having decided that was the way to do things, and he had stuck by it all these years. Kachiko certainly seemed to enjoy it, of course she was the recipient of all the joy, so that seemed to help move matters along.  
  
"I'm not going down," Nabiki said through the door.  
  
"We have to. Dad and Kasumi are insisting on it since we have the family all together for a birthday for the first time in over a decade." A couple of weeks earlier, Akane might have been as enthusiastic as her oldest sister, but Kachiko''s behavior was starting to wear thin on Akane, even with most of the tension generated by the race gone. Skipping the birthday would have been just fine with her.   
  
Too bad Ranma didn't have the same attitude. Of course, that was because he desperately wanted to give his present to Kachiko. Akane had hit him and called him an idiot for acting so enthusiastic about giving her mother a gift (the idea of him wanting to celebrate some other girl's birthday more than Akane's hurting her), until she learned he planned on giving her 'Tickets to a Sparring Match Duel' with him. Somehow, Akane couldn't get angry if he regarded that as an appropriate gift. That and the fact Kachiko had been ducking out on every attempt Ranma made to get her to fight him again, made Akane admit it was bound to cause more harm than enjoyment, which suited her just fine. As long as Ranma used better judgment when it came time to come up with a gift for Akane's birthday, or she'd share her disappointment over his insensitivity with something far more painful than a mere sparring match.   
  
Nabiki's voice came from behind the door again. "I already gave her my gift."  
  
"Then come and eat the cake."  
  
"No."  
  
Akane was having none of it. She opened the door to her sister's bedroom and swore she would drag Nabiki down to share in the joy, and pain, the party was sure to contain. The instant her eyes fell upon her sister, her attitude shifted in the opposite direction.   
  
Nabiki was on her bed, lying on her stomach. Several pillows were propped under her pelvis, thrusting her panty-covered bottom upward. Even with two ice packs strapped to each cheek, Akane could see her rear end was colored deep shade of scarlet.  
  
Unable to speak at first, all Akane could do was point. Eventually the shock wore away, and she sputtered out, "Kachi did that to you, didn't she? This time she's gone too far. When I get my hands on her, I'll make her apologize." She smacked a fist into her open palm.  
  
"No, wait," Nabiki said in a surprisingly calm voice. "I had this coming."  
  
It took Akane a moment to believe what she had just heard. That her sister could take such a thing so passively was unbelievable. Nabiki was the most insidiously vengeful person she knew. "Just because she's our mother, sort of, is no reason to let her abuse you."  
  
With obvious reluctance, Nabiki said, "I was the one that was out of line. Mom bailed me out of a bad situation I got into at great personal risk to herself."  
  
"Why would she do that?" Akane said before she could stop herself.   
  
"Lapse in judgment, as near as we could tell. She assured me it wouldn't happen again."  
  
"If you're sure."  
  
"I-" Nabiki winced in pain as she shifted wrong on the bed. "I'm sure."  
  
"Then I guess I'll let it slide," Akane said it in a way that implied Nabiki could change her mind, but all her older sister did was nod. Akane shook her head sadly and closed the door to the room.   
  
That Nabiki accepted that sort of punishment for whatever she did boggled Akane's mind. Nabiki never did that either. But the most disturbing thing was the small smile Nabiki wore when she had spoken, one she was probably unaware of herself. It wasn't one of pride or promising revenge, but rather it was one Akane couldn't recall seeing: It was one of subtle joy.  
  
"Hey, Akane! Get down here! Kachi's opening presents!" Ranma's voice called out from downstairs.  
  
"But I don't want a dinner for two at Chez Italian with that old goat!" Kachiko's plaintive voice cried out.  
  
"Open mine," came Nodoka's delighted voice.   
  
The sound of paper tearing was followed up, "What the hell am I going to use a sweeper for?"  
  
"To sweep, Mother. Now open my cooking utensils. Oops. I gave it away," Kasumi's voice finally joined in.  
  
"This is my worst birthday ever!"   
  
Akane shook her head sadly, and with great resolve, forced herself to walk down the steps.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
End notes.   
  
Special thanks to.  
  
Michael Chase  
  
Max M.  
  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
  
The Apprentice  
  
Chris Horton 


	12. The Things We Wish For Chapter 11

Prologue  
  
Pantyhose Tarou took a moment to straighten his tie and adjust the bouquet of flowers cradled in his arm one last time before reaching forward and ringing the doorbell.   
  
Things were going perfectly. He didn't need a mirror to know he cut quite the dashing figure. The tuxedo he had 'requisitioned' in the wee hours of the morning from a tailor's shop fit his slender, well-muscled frame perfectly. His hair was newly cut, still low in the back but with the bangs removed from the front. And to complete his ensemble, he wore his best pantyhose tied around his forehead. It was the hot pink one. Girls loved hot pink. All of that, in addition to his naturally handsome features, charming personality, and unrelenting charisma, made him irresistible to members of the opposite gender.  
  
Tarou snickered quietly to himself until the door opened and revealed the figure behind it. It took Tarou a moment to recognize the man with the mustache as being the Tendou girls' father. Shun? Spoon? It was something that started with an 'S', not that it really mattered.  
  
Tarou smiled and said, "I'm here to pick up Kachi for our date. Why don't you go inside and grab her for me? Be quick, and I'll give you a tip." He thought the last bit was a nice touch. Who said Pantyhose Tarou didn't exude class?  
  
Soun's eyes bulged until they nearly fell out of his head. He roared, "You're here to date my Kachi?!"  
  
Casually, Tarou said, "Yeah. I mean, I didn't call ahead or anything. I thought I'd surprise her. Chicks dig surprises. Now you run along and tell her that her Romeo is waiting."  
  
Rather than retreating inside, Soun emerged from the house and took a menacing step forward. "See here, you. I won't let you have anything to do with my wife."  
  
Tarou began to draw back in surprise for a moment before recovering. His stance became one of defiance as he stood his ground and snickered. "Okay, you old coot, you almost had me going there. I like to think that I know Kachi well enough to say unequivocally that she would never marry some creepy geriatric like you. Aside from you being old enough to be her father, you could never come close to satisfying a hot chick like her. I can tell she's one of them really passionate types that can't get enough of snuggling, and other more naughty stuff that I'm not comfortable discussing with an old fossil like you. Heck, I bet she's so energetic, she'll make me have to put out some effort. Not that I can't keep up with her. I'm more than man enough for that." He cleared his throat before the fantasy became too entrenched. "Anyhow, an old guy like you would end up having a heart attack inside a month. What she needs is some hot stud, like yours truly, to satisfy her needs."   
  
Talking about Kachiko really made Tarou excited, at least as much as when he got into a fight. It was another sign of the True Love he had for Kachiko. To Soun, he warned, "Now that we're clear on everything, why don't you move that ancient backside of yours, so I can go see my woman, before I have to move it for you?"  
  
Soun's face took on a reddish hue as he began trembling uncontrollably. "Why... you... little...."  
  
Tarou shook his head sadly. There was nothing more pathetic than an ancient fart that thought he still had 'the stuff'. "Fine, old man. We'll do it the hard way." Tarou cracked his knuckles ominously and moved forward.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The pepper shaker slipped from Kasumi's grasp as she felt a chill run down her spine, one caused by the loud roar of terror inducing rage that filled the air. She abandoned her meal preparations and hurriedly ran out of the kitchen to where she had felt the origin of the disturbance.  
  
Outside, her father stood above Pantyhose Tarou's prone form, shaking it back and forth like an unwanted rag doll. Tarou didn't respond to the action in the slightest; he just lay limply in Soun's grasp, staring off into space with a look of wide-eyed horror and a rictus smile painted on his face.  
  
"Oh my." Kasumi was a touch worried. Ordinarily, she couldn't feel the fear generated by her father's demon head attack,. It had something to do with growing up around it, as well as her naturally placid nature rendering her largely immune. However, this time not only had she felt the technique in use, but it had been at a great distance as well. Truly her father must have been distraught to produce such a tremendous amount of power in his attack.  
  
The other residents emerged hurriedly from of the house as well. Like Kasumi, they too had been drawn by the aura of terror Soun had generated. They stood by mutely and watched the scene unfold.   
  
Kachiko was the first to understand what had happened and reacted. "Yeah, that's it, you old coot! Make yourself useful for a change and kick the crap out of that conceited, obnoxious jerk!"  
  
For a moment, Soun stopped his throttling. He couldn't believe his ears. His wife was cheering for him. More enthusiastically than ever, he started working over Tarou's limp form, kicking and punching with all his might. He would have kept doing it until he couldn't swing his arms any longer, but Ranma and Genma dragged him off before he caused any permanent damage.  
  
Kachiko continued whooping it up. "Sweet. Just for that, I'll treat you to some of my famous curry bread, once I dump bull butt in the trash," she told Soun in delight.  
  
"I always loved your curry bread," Soun said. He broke free of the Saotomes' hold and grabbed Tarou's limp form, hurling it over his shoulder like a sack of rice. "Let me take care of him, and you can start baking."  
  
"Done deal." Kachiko went back inside, humming pleasantly to herself.   
  
Kasumi clapped her hands in delight. "How wonderful. Mother was actually cheering for Father. I'll have to start inviting Mr. Pantyhose over for meals."  
  
"Oh, I'm sure he'll be more than happy to accept that," Nabiki said dryly as yet another day at the Tendou household got underway.  
  
Xxxxxxxx  
  
The Things We Wish For...  
  
Chapter 10  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/d_b_sommer/index.html  
  
Or R+C books at:  
  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
  
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen...  
  
And on to the fic.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Two cards. And no dealing from the bottom of the deck."  
  
"Come on, would I do that to you?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Ha! That's what you think. I'll have you know I believe card games are one of the few things in this world that is sacrosanct. I'd never screw around by cheating at a card game. Nor would I let anyone else screw around either, if you get my meaning."  
  
"In that case, read em and weep. Full house."  
  
"!#$%^. I was sure you were bluffing. Another hand!"  
  
"Okay. It's your money."  
  
"Actually, it's your money. You're only just now starting to win some of it back."  
  
Ranma entered the room and nearly facefaulted into the floor at the sight of Kachiko and Nabiki calmly sitting at a table and playing poker with one another. Well, Kachiko seemed slightly irritated as she took swig from the bottle of beer next to her, but was quickly regaining her composure. Both had anted up already, and were in the process of considering their hands.   
  
Daring to tread in the unknown waters, Ranma asked, "So, what's going on?"  
  
Kachiko's eyes remained fixed to her cards, an unreadable expression on her face. "We decided to be more open about trying to one up the other, so we're playing games of poker to see who's the best. I'm winning." There was a touch of pride in her voice.  
  
Nabiki's eyebrow arced in mild reproach. "No. You had a hot streak. Now I'm on one. I'll be getting back my money, and some of yours, shortly."  
  
"We'll see." Kachiko tossed a few chips in. Nabiki answered with the same.  
  
"I'm good at poker," Ranma boasted.  
  
"Then why don't you join us?" Nabiki offered with the look of a spider decked out in its best outfit inviting the fly into its web to drop by for 'just a bite.'  
  
"Forget it," Kachiko answered. "With his poker face, you might as well just reach into his pocket, take the wallet, and grab the money. It's no fun just taking it. The enjoyment comes in outwitting a savvy opponent. Then you know the satisfaction of earning your winnings."  
  
"But I'm good at poker," Ranma insisted.  
  
"Ha!" Kachiko threw down three cards. "You're exactly like this guy I knew back in my old school. He thought he was the man when it came to poker and just had to challenge me to prove who was better. It was pathetic. I beat him four hundred consecutive times. After the last hand, his mind snapped like a dry twig. The next day he came to school dressed up like one of the guys on the cards, proclaimed himself 'The Gambler King', and stated that he would show us all by making his fortune by gambling." Kachiko laughed hard. "I'm telling you, he was so crappy at cards, he couldn't beat a five year old with a loaded deck."  
  
Nabiki's smile was nearly ear to ear as she stared at the crimson faced Ranma. "Oh, I'm fairly certain he was good enough to manage that."  
  
A sullen Ranma grumbled, "I'm going out," and left without another word.  
  
"Touched a nerve, did I?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"Let's just say, Ranma's had problems with gambling in the past, and I'll take two."  
  
Sagely, Kachiko said, "Can't be good at everything. Best to be great at one or two things and bad at others instead of just being average with everything. Take me for instance, I'm great at cards, martial arts, making friends, being highly observant of my surroundings."  
  
"Being modest," Nabiki slipped in.  
  
"Yeah, that too, though Sakura always slapped me in the back of the head when I said it. She was good at slapping me. Not that I deserved it, at least, most of the time. Not that many people agreed with me when I said that, either." Changing the subject, Kachiko said, "Why don't I bet fifty chips?" and slid the appropriate amount to the middle of the table.  
  
Nabiki looked at the huge stack of chips in the center of the table and closely examined the time lost girl's features for any hint of what she held. There was a cocky grin there, but thirty hands had taught Nabiki that she always held that grin, even if she hadn't managed to snag something as crappy as a pair of twos.   
  
After a minute's indecision, and based on the fact she only had two pairs, Nabiki tossed her cards down. "Fold. What did you have?"   
  
Kachiko threw down her cards. "Flush. Told you my worm had turned."   
  
"Again," Nabiki insisted, passing on making a snide remark at the poor application of the saying. She was certain her luck hadn't left her and it was a one hand aberration. She still needed to get her money back and at least break even.   
  
One thing Nabiki admitted to herself was that playing cards with her mother... Kachiko, rather, was that it was proving itself to be unexpectedly fun. Actually, she was finding Kachiko much more tolerable after the incident with the hourglass. That the girl had been willing to risk so much for a nominal enemy, or at least antagonist, spoke volumes for her when 'the chips were down' (Nabiki prided herself on knowing how to turn an appropriate phrase). Good volumes, since Kachiko was normally quite loud as a rule, and not always in the nicest of ways.   
  
Though once Nabiki thought about it, a lot of her antagonism was from the rest of the families (except Ranma) trying to make her conform to something she simply wasn't. Every time they tried, Kachiko rebelled in the worst way possible. It was easy to see where Akane might have gotten her stubborn streak from. Nabiki found herself wondering if her grandparents really had been that old fashioned and determined to make their only daughter into a 'traditional' girl, as Kachiko claimed. The few times Nabiki had asked her father about the matter, he confessed to only knowing his in-laws in a very superficial manner. His mother-in-law died two years after he and Kachiko were married, and her husband died within the year afterwards.   
  
Still, the way Kachiko had described her upbringing, it was probably a miracle she hadn't bolted on her own. Or perhaps she would have, save that a bad leg prevented one from running very far.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The doorbell rang while Kachiko was in the middle of dealing a new hand. Eagerly she hopped to her feet and said, "Maybe it's Mr. Panties coming by for seconds." She called out, "Soun-chan, get ready to scare the piss out of Bull-butt again!" and ran down the hall to the door.  
  
Kachiko threw the door open and shouted out an enthusiastic, "Hi there!"  
  
Standing on the porch was an adult Miss Hinako, wearing a tight, clingy dress that accentuated her every womanly curve, and whose low cut drew eyes to her impressive chest. She had a great deal of make up on, far more than she ever wore at school, that only enhanced her natural beauty. The necklace and earrings she wore glistened under the rays of the sun in the way only expensive jewelry could. The vision was one that would have left virtually any man gaping in lust.  
  
"Hello, Mrs. Tendou, I'm here to see Soun-chan," she said pleasantly.   
  
Kachiko's enthusiasm died. "Oh, it's you."   
  
"Yes, I'm here fo-"  
  
Kachiko closed the door in Hinako's face.  
  
"Who was it?" Nabiki called out.  
  
"Garbage-" Kachiko was interrupted by a blast of chi energy that plowed through the door and hit her squarely in the torso. It drove her through the next wall and into the room beyond.  
  
Soun, who had already headed toward the door, as per his wife's request, hurried even more quickly at the sounds of destruction. He saw the splintered remains of the door and immediately tensed for a fight.   
  
Upon looking through the huge hole in the door, he saw chibi-Hinako standing there, hands still up and making a circle. "Oh, hello there. You're Akane's little friend, right?"  
  
"Little?" the girl said in surprise, then looked down at herself.  
  
Soun opened the door, which then fell off its hinges and struck the ground, leaving him with only a broken handle in his hand. Accepting yet more damage to his home, he brushed off the destruction and walked up to the girl. He took a fatherly tone. "My, that dress is a bit big for you, isn't it? And perhaps you shouldn't wear so much make-up. You should wait until you're a little older."  
  
Tears welled in the girl's eyes. She burst out crying, then ran away.  
  
Soun was at a loss. None of his girls had reacted quite so badly when they entered their phases of trying to dress older than they were. He was so distracted by the tearful reaction that he failed to notice the hole in the wall behind him. He simply walked deeper into the house, playing out the scene in his mind and wondering where he might have gone wrong.   
  
Soun was long gone by the time Kachiko revived enough to mumble, "Size-changing bitch. I'll show her where she can stick her !#$% coins."  
  
It was as Kachiko was starting to groggily remove chunks of the plaster that had fallen on her that Nodoka walked past the hole and noticed the cursing figure. She turned her nose up disdainfully at the sight of the time lost girl lying among the remains of the wall. "How typical. Swearing like a sailor and destroying the house. Why, if you were my child, I'd turn you over my knee and spank you myself."  
  
That roused Kachiko's senses, as well as her ire. She hopped up, sending a cloud of dust around her, and confronted Nodoka. She wagged an accusatory finger in the woman's direction. "Oh yeah? Well I sure as hell couldn't say the same thing about you. My lap ain't big enough to hold hips that wide, and with an ass as fat as yours I doubt you'd even feel someone paddling your bottom."  
  
Nodoka turned a shade of crimson and a number of disused facial tics made an abrupt reappearance. "Enough! I will brook your insults no longer! I challenge you to a duel!"  
  
Kachiko recoiled slightly. "Hey, I was only joking about spanking you. I don't like spanking. Or women. And even if I did, I wouldn't want to spank old, saggy women whose bottoms would jiggle like gelatin. "  
  
"Dojo! Now!" Nodoka stormed off, each step thundering throughout the house.  
  
Nabiki watched Nodoka walk past. She didn't bother asking anything. She simply rearranged the cards and began playing solitaire.  
  
Genma was lying on his back, relaxing, when his wife stomped into their temporary bedroom. She went to the closet where they kept their belongings.   
  
He said, "Hello, Dear. What seems to be the matter?"  
  
She glared at him as she pulled a wrapped bundle from the closet.  
  
"Ah, I see. It doesn't concern me." Genma rolled over and decided to force himself to go to sleep. No good would come from being awake for whatever it was that was about to happen.  
  
Upon arriving at the dojo, the matriarch of the Saotome family found Kachiko already waiting. The time lost girl's battle preparations seemed to consist of a nearly empty bottle of beer in her hand and idly leaning against a wall.   
  
Kachiko smirked. "Come on, I can tell by the way you move you don't know how to fight. Why don't we call things off and bake some cookies?"  
  
The condescending smile was more than Nodoka could bear. She unwrapped the bundle she had brought with her, revealing her family katana. She then tucked the scabbard into the waistband of her kimono.  
  
"Aw, this isn't going to work. I can't hit you. Ranma would never forgive me," Kachiko complained.  
  
"I assure you, this fight will be over long before that happens."  
  
Kachiko had a pained expression. She placed the now empty bottle down on the floor. "This sucks. You really got to learn to get a sense of humor. You don't see me getting all bitchy if someone calls my ass fat."  
  
"That's because you don't have an ass, which only makes sense since it counterbalances your lack of a top."   
  
The sound of grinding teeth mixed with a guttural growl reached Nodoka's ears. She shifted into a combat stance in answer to the one Kachiko suddenly took.  
  
Nodoka's grip tightened on her weapon. "I shall end this in one blow. Lighting Fast Quick Draw!" she shouted, pulling the weapon from its sheath in a move so fast it was little more than a metallic blur.   
  
Even Kachiko was taken aback by the blinding speed Nodoka demonstrated. Then she became taken aback at how the blur promptly flew up into the ceiling, only to have its momentum stopped as it buried itself in the main crossbeam in the roof of the dojo directly above Kachiko's head.  
  
Nodoka chewed on her thumbnail as she stared at her family heirloom embedded in the ceiling. "Oh dear. How did that happen? It looked so simple on television."  
  
It was more than Kachiko could bear. She fell to the floor, rolling back and forth, and laughing maniacally. "That's too good. You can't even hold on to your sword. You're more dangerous to yourself than to your opponent." Tears rolled down Kachiko's face.  
  
Her laughter was so uproarious that she failed to hear a groan come from above her head. The crossbeam, a veteran of over two dozen full scale battles within the confines of the dojo, and one of the few original pieces of the building dating before the Ranma Saotome Era, finally gave in to the most recent damage inflicted upon it. The end the sword had been embedded in had mostly been severed by the sharp blade. The other end, connected by mere splinters from previous fights, could not support the sudden shift of weight and cracked completely through. The same thing happened to the other side, breaking the end the sword was in.  
  
Kachiko had just a moment to see the timber plunging toward her before it connected fully with her skull.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Come on, Mom, you have to tell me how you did it!"  
  
"Sorry, Ranma, some techniques are so dangerous they must remain secret until you are old enough, and responsible enough, to handle them."  
  
"Quit it with the 'wizened --and I do mean wizened-- mentor' act! You just got lucky, that's all! Don't even try pretending you meant to do that!"  
  
Nodoka waved dismissively at Kachiko whose constant complaints could not disturb the aura of satisfaction that surrounded the Saotome matriarch. "The folly of youth. You do not accept what is plainly obvious."  
  
The aura was only adding to Kachiko's irritation like salt rubbed into an open wound. "Fine! Give me a rematch."  
  
"No." Nodoka said firmly. "I have proven my point." She rose from the kitchen table and prepared to leave.   
  
Kachiko leaped for Nodoka's feet, grabbing only the hem of the kimono. Prone on the ground, she began chanting, "Rematch, rematch!"  
  
"Away, little girl." Nodoka tried pulling her outfit away from the clinging martial artist.  
  
Suddenly, another figure jumped upon Kachiko and began tugging at her own skirt. "I want a rematch, too," Ranma stated.  
  
Distracted, Kachiko released her hold on Nodoka. "No way!"  
  
"Yeah, come on. If Mom can take you, I know I can."  
  
"She got lucky!"  
  
"And so did you!"  
  
"Only if you equate luck with intelligence."  
  
"If I do, will you give me a rematch?"  
  
"No!"  
  
Nodoka left the room, humming happily to herself. It was a good day for a change, perhaps the first since her arrival at Kasumi's insistence. She would have to share her good cheer with her husband. Kachiko's perpetual resistance at any womanly duties, and reflexive digs at Nodoka's age, had soured her mood so greatly that she and her husband had not been acting like a married couple, despite finally being together and alone. Now Nodoka was in the mood for Genma to live up to his husbandly duties. At least those that did not involve giving her time to herself by going out and drinking with Soun.  
  
Xxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi stared in consternation at the scene. It was terrible. Her plan had called for Auntie Saotome to help Kachiko awaken her, admittedly very buried, mother persona. Instead, not only was Kachiko failing to act more motherly, but now Auntie was behaving more like a rambunctious teenager as well. And worse, it was obvious the older woman was delighted about her actions.  
  
Distraught and out of sorts in a way she had not felt for some time, Kasumi decided to settle her mind by going out to do some shopping. Something had to be done to make Kachiko motherly once again. Otherwise things would never return to normal and she could never pick up where she left off with her mother.   
  
It took her only a moment to grab the shopping list, her purse, and leave the house.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Nodoka was in an even more delighted mood than before as she made her way to the bath, bucket of toiletries in hand. Genma had been more than happy to share in her good cheer, much to her delight. It had been rare they could indulge in an hour alone, and so actively. Now she was almost as giddy as Kachiko normally was.   
  
And then something odd occurred to Nodoka. She was giddy and still feeling quite frisky, almost to the point where she wanted to turn around and return to the comfort of her husband. Neither of these were states she was normally in, nor had experienced for some time. Not for years, to be certain.   
  
When she had first been married, she had been like that all the time. Eventually, things settled down and gone to what she regarded as normal. Even when Genma returned from his decade long journey with Ranma, it hadn't exactly been one joyous moment after another. To put it bluntly, her life had returned to the way it had been right before her husband and Ranma had left, which was what Nodoka would have claimed was 'normal'. And normal was not what Nodoka had been feeling over the last couple of hours. It was something infinitely better and more enjoyable.  
  
"I am not frumpy, and I enjoy life," Nodoka said to herself. But there was a nagging sensation at the back of her mind, a whispering voice that sounded far too much like Kachiko, that suggested there might have been at least a grain of truth in what the younger girl had said. Maybe, just maybe it wouldn't hurt to loosen up just a bit. Not to the degree of Kachiko's outrageous behavior, but perhaps there wasn't a need to be so perpetually formal either.   
  
Nodoka tightened her robe. Listening to that insistent voice and considering what it suggested could wait. There were more important matters to take care of first. It wouldn't do to smell the way she did now. It would be most scandalous. What happened in a bedroom remained in a bedroom; there was no need to broadcast to the world what Nodoka had been up to. That meant cleaning up.   
  
Just as Nodoka arrived at the door to the bath, she heard an unusual sound from within that made her come to a halt. It was unmistakably a grunt, one too high pitched to be coming from a man.   
  
Her actions over the last hour coloring her perceptions, Nodoka silently prayed, "Please let it not be my son fornicating with that girl again."  
  
A louder sound of a hard impact reached Nodoka's ears; a sound that could not possibly have originated with what she had been thinking. Concerned that something was amiss, Nodoka ignored the 'Occupied' sign and hurried into the bath. Before her was a naked Kachiko, bent over with her forehead leaning against the porcelain sink. Her knuckles were white with the deathgrip she had on the side of the basin. Heavy, rapid gasps escaped from her, as though she had just completed a marathon at a sprint. Her face was ashen and a wild look was in her eyes. A towel had pooled around her ankles, and the wetness that still clung to her body made it obvious she had just used the furo. There was a red mark at the center of her forehead, and several chips of porcelain lay at her feet next to the towel.   
  
"Are you all right?" All of the former taunting had left Nodoka's voice. What remained was genuine concern.  
  
"I'm fine," Kachiko said, starting to catch her breath.   
  
"What happened?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
"It does not look like 'nothing' to me."  
  
Kachiko's recovery seemed to be incredibly rapid. She sounded almost normal as she said bitterly, "Perhaps if some incredibly skilled swordswoman hadn't dropped half the dojo on my head, I would be feeling better." Indignant now, and, aside from the red mark on her forehead, in normal spirits, Kachiko wrapped the towel under her arms and exited the bath in a huff.   
  
Nodoka shook her head. Apparently whatever it was hadn't dampened any of Kachiko's vigor. She had probably tripped and slammed her head against the sink. That made sense. Yes, that was probably what had happened. Not surprisingly, there was little damage done due to the thickness of the vexing girl's skull. It was probably bulletproof as well. Still, there was one thing that troubled Nodoka.   
  
When she had first entered, for just a brief second, she could have sworn Kachiko was slightly transparent.   
  
"I do hate it when I start seeing things." Nodoka removed her robe and prepared to rinse herself off.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi Tendou walked about the shopping district in what could only be described as a depression. It simply wasn't fair. Her mother was back with her, her fondest dream come true. All should have been right with the world, and Kasumi should have been happier than she had ever been in her life. Her whole family should have been delighted, and as perfect as it was when she had been little.   
  
Only it wasn't that way. It was nothing like that at all. Kachiko refused to act like the sweet, wonderful, perfect woman who had raised Kasumi and her sisters and been a wife for her husband. Instead, her behavior was almost like that of a complete stranger. But that was the difference, one that made things so much worse. The 'almost'. There were still things Kachiko did, little habits, quaint sayings, her physical appearance, humor that no one but her seemed to think was amusing, that reminded Kasumi exactly of the woman who had given birth to her. Kachiko was just enough like her in those treasured memories that made Kasumi know this girl was her mother, and that a prod in the right direction would have her acting like normal in no time. It just had to be the right kind of prod. Normal ones seemed to produce the opposite of their intended effect. So a special one that would solve everything all at once would be the best. It was just a matter of finding the right one. It was up to Kasumi to act upon that knowledge, something she did not like doing, but was good at when she did it.   
  
Kasumi was still pondering her dilemma when a quartet of teenage girls rushed past, nearly knocking her over. Unmindful of the near collision, they continued their breakneck pace and did succeed in knocking over a man, one at least in his sixties, and from all appearances, very frail.   
  
With a surprising spring in his step, he shot back to his feet and shook his fist in the direction of the girls. "You little punks should watch where you're going!"  
  
One of the girls paused long enough to give an obscene gesture before hurrying along again.  
  
"You little brat! You're lucky I don't give you the beating you deserve!" he shouted.  
  
Kasumi went over to the man and asked, "Are you all right? Do you need any help?"  
  
The man looked at her suspiciously, as though he expected her to behave in the same way as the teenagers that had bowled him over. He examined Kasumi closely, squinting a bit, before giving a slight nod of approval. "I'm fine. It was those lousy kids. They don't care about anything. None of them do nowadays, but especially the girls."  
  
Kasumi nodded her head. She had noticed the same thing.   
  
Seeing he had her attention, the man continued. "In my day, girls would never run around in skimpy little skirts knocking people down. They knew their place. They tried to find good husbands, learned how to run a house, and have children. Now all they want to do is dress like prostitutes, sleep around, and try to get educated so they can get jobs. Emancipation, bah! They have their priorities complete screwed up. Whatever happened to traditional values? Girls just don't have them nowadays"  
  
Kasumi sighed. "It sounds like my mother."  
  
"Your mother?" the man asked. "What do you mean? Surely a traditional girl like you has a proper mother."  
  
Kasumi nodded. "I did, but lately she's been acting, well, like a rowdy teenager. She's been drinking heavily, getting into fights, refusing to cook or clean. She's even been going after younger men and ignoring the man she's married to."  
  
The old man nodded in understanding. "Menopause. They do that sometimes when it hits. They think they can recapture a lost youth, but all they really do is forget what's important."  
  
"That's exactly it," Kasumi said. "Except the menopause. I'm fairly certain that's not the cause of her behavior."  
  
"Well, whatever it is, she's not acting like a mother should, right?"  
  
Kasumi nodded readily "Absolutely. It's almost like she's completely changed."  
  
The old man looked Kasumi over for a second. "I can tell you're a very proper girl that's only trying to help. I'll tell you what I'll do. I might be able to help you get your mother back on the right track again and acting like a proper woman should."  
  
Kasumi nearly wept in joy. "Oh, can you?"  
  
"I think so. Follow me."  
  
Kasumi did so eagerly, trying to keep from hoping too much that the solution to all her mother's problems lay with this elderly gentleman.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The journey to the man's home was brief. He only lived two streets away. He owned a small apartment above a grocer's. It was a quaint, tidy place that had a very homey and traditional feel to it.   
  
The moment they entered, the man began reminiscing about the past. "My beloved wife, god rest her soul, went through a similar phase when she was older. She started rambling about getting a job since she was bored with keeping house and we didn't have any children to take care of. I tried being reasonable and telling her no, but then she started getting mouthy with me. She even threatened to leave, claiming I was a Neanderthal with archaic values that no one in the modern day lived by, including herself. But I got my hands on an item that helped her recover her senses. Soon she was back to happily minding the home and letting me take care of her, the way it should be." He sighed, cast adrift on the memories.  
  
"How did you do it?" Kasumi asked eagerly.  
  
"Ah, that was the tricky part." The man went to a storage closet next to the kitchen and brought out a broom. It appeared quite ordinary. It was light green in color and held plastic bristles rather than the straw type Kasumi preferred. He held up the item as though it was the most made of gold and embedded with jewels. "I helped her with this."  
  
"A broom?"  
  
"It's no ordinary broom. This is the 'Stepford Peace at Home' special model broom. Made in Stepford, Connecticut, in the United States. Probably the only good thing to come from that country of worthless gaijin," he grumbled. "Anyway, it has special properties that awaken the proper instincts in women and they accept their role in society. You give your mother this, and she'll come to her senses and see the proper way of things in no time."  
  
"Oh my," Kasumi said in awe. And it looked so ordinary. She had no idea something so mundane could be so powerful.  
  
The old man seemed satisfied by her reaction. "Now here's how it works. You have to let her use it for a whole day, otherwise its effects wear off. Luckily, after holding it for a few minutes, she'll want to keep it with her, so that shouldn't be a problem. Just make sure she's not separated from it."  
  
"Right," Kasumi said firmly.   
  
"You don't have to worry about guys handling it, it only works on women, so you don't have to keep it out of your father's reach. Now, I'll wrap it up for you so you can give it as a gift. It has to be flesh-to-flesh contact with the broom handle, so don't you go grabbing it. If you do you'll want to keep it for yourself, and I can tell you don't need any help."  
  
Kasumi bowed deeply. "Thank you for all your help, kind Sir."  
  
"You're more than welcome. Oh, if only all girls today were as dutiful as you, our country would once again be on the road to true greatness instead of the ineffectual joke we are now," he sobbed.   
  
Patting his shoulder, Kasumi comforted the old man. She couldn't wait to see if the broom would work they way he claimed. She prayed it would. It might be her mother's only hope for a successful recovery from whatever it was that ailed her.  
  
xxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi could barely rein in her excitement as she burst into her house. "Mother, I'm home!"   
  
A voice drifted back, "I'm in the kitchen."  
  
Being mindful not to damage the key to salvation, Kasumi carefully made her way to the kitchen. Upon arriving, she saw her mother hard at work over the stove. "Mother, you're cooking," she said in surprise.  
  
Surly, Kachiko answered, "You weren't here. I don't trust the old hag to serve me anything. She might decide to slip in a little poison, since dropping a dojo on my head didn't finish me off. Nabiki won't cook. Akane can't cook. I know better than to expect guys to be able to do more than boil noodles. So I guess that leaves me." She paid closer attention to one of the pots. "Just because I don't enjoy cooking doesn't mean I can't do it. I can cook fine."  
  
"I know you can, Mother," Kasumi encouraged. And to think, soon she'd not only cook, but enjoy it as well. All she had to do was receive enlightenment.   
  
"Since I know how much you like gifts, here." Kasumi thrust the present forward.   
  
The amateur manner in which the item had been wrapped left little doubt to its identity. Kachiko rolled her eyes. "Gee, I wonder what that could be?" She held up her hand before Kasumi could form the first syllable. "Sarcasm. Don't answer it or you're grounded."  
  
Grounding would have been fine with Kasumi if it meant her mother would return to normal. No sacrifice was too great for her family.   
  
Kachiko gained a pained expression as she stared at the item in her hands. "You know, when I say, 'I like gifts' it's with the unspoken assumption that it is a present I would like." Despite her complaints, Kachiko's eyes took on an eager gleam as she tore off the wrapping paper, sending it all over the floor. Covering gone, she stared at the broom distastefully. "Shoot. And here I was hoping this was a misdirection ploy and you secretly had something neat hidden inside." She looked at Kasumi, who was practically jumping up and down in anxiousness. "What?"  
  
"Why don't you try sweeping with it, Mother?"  
  
"I'm kind of busy cooking. Why don't you sweep?" She thrust the broom toward Kasumi.  
  
She backed away as though it was a poisonous snake. "No, you have to be the one to sweep up your mess."  
  
"I told you, I'm busy." She held it out expectantly to Kasumi again.  
  
"I'll take over the cooking." Kasumi brushed past Kachiko and stationed herself in front of the stove.   
  
Hesitantly, Kachiko asked, "Do you know how to prepare that? It's a tricky dish."  
  
"Yes, you taught me it. It took me a while, but I have since mastered it."  
  
"I didn't teach... Oh, never mind. I hate this temporal displacement crap," Kachiko grumbled. As she did so, the broom in her hand brushed ever so gently across the floor. As the bristles came into contact with the floor, Kachiko stiffened and her eyes goggled, as though she had been shocked. She looked at the broom in her hands in amazement. She repositioned her hands, firmly grasping the handle, then swept again, this time intentionally.   
  
"Oooo." Kachiko began sweeping in earnest. Her eyes were all but glowing as she stared in awe at the way the discarded wrapping paper was forming a growing pile with each sweeping stroke. "I never realized sweeping could be so... fun." She picked up her pace.  
  
"Yes, Mother, it is fun," Kasumi said soothingly as the broom worked its special kind of magic. Kasumi could barely keep from crying.   
  
At last, all was right with the world.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Nabiki came down from her room, yawning as she headed for the kitchen looking for something to snack on. Her afternoon nap had done her some good. And she was not lazy like Genma. Using her nimble mind burned up energy the way a martial artist's nimble body burned it up, and she occasionally needed to lay down to recharge it. Though once she considered the matter, it was usually around this time of the day that Kachiko was curled up on the back porch, surrounded by empty beer bottles as she snored up a storm. Maybe the naps were a hereditary thing.   
  
"Hi," Nabiki said as she walked past Kachiko, who was dressed in a kimono as she swept up a storm.  
  
"Good afternoon," Kachiko said warmly.  
  
Nabiki headed into the kitchen, opened the refrigerator, and grabbed the first edible food that met her eyes: some leftover sushi from the other night. She stuck a trio of pieces in her mouth, savoring the cold, clammy seafood. It was just what she was looking for, though a dash of wasabi would have added a little kick to help fully wake her up.   
  
She removed the small take out box from the refrigerator, munched on another piece, then returned to the hall where Kachiko was continuing to sweep. The time-lost girl was humming away as her arms pumped furiously, trying her best to clean up a hard to reach spot under a stand.   
  
"So, did you lose a bet?" Nabiki asked as she leaned against a wall and continued to devour the seafood.  
  
Kachiko momentarily paused in her sweeping. "Whatever do you mean?"  
  
"That outfit and the cleaning." Nabiki pointed to them with a piece of sushi in hand.   
  
Kachiko looked at herself. "I'm simply wearing something for the house and doing a little sweeping is all."  
  
"You seem awful happy about it."  
  
"I am."  
  
Nabiki considered that. So something else was responsible for Kachiko's delighted mood; something that made a duty as abhorrent as cleaning not affect the time lost girl's mood in the slightest. "Did something to happen to Mrs. Saotome or Miss Hinako?"  
  
Kachiko appeared aghast. "Goodness, I certainly hope not."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"They're both such nice people, I wouldn't want anything bad to happen to either of them."  
  
Nabiki nearly choked on the piece of sushi in her mouth.   
  
Concern was evident on Kachiko's features. "Are you all right?" She gently patted Nabiki once on the back.  
  
Nabiki was amazed, both by the words coming from Kachiko's mouth, as well as the fact that she had passed up a golden opportunity to slap her hard on the back using the excuse that it was in effort to dislodge the food.  
  
"Do you need a glass of water?" Kachiko asked once Nabiki got over her coughing fit.  
  
In the beginning, Nabiki had assumed that Kachiko was wearing the outfit and cleaning as some sort of gag, but now she began to suspect something far more sinister. Looking closely in Kachiko's eyes, past the obvious concern, there was something else. The best way to describe it was almost a sort of vapidity, as though not all of Kachiko was there, or some unseen puppet master was pulling her strings and having the girl dance to an unheard tune. No matter what problems Nabiki might have had with Kachiko in the past, dullness was not something anyone could accuse Kachiko of being. Seeing the martial artist behave in such a manner was outright chilling.   
  
Kasumi entered the hallway. She gave a delighted, "There you are, Mother," and drew up next to her.   
  
Kachiko was equally pleased. "I was hoping you were finished with the laundry. I'm almost done with the cleaning in here. What else shall we do? Wash the windows? Scrub the floors? Shop for groceries?"  
  
Nabiki grabbed Kasumi by the arm. She said to Kachiko, "Pardon me, I need to have a private talk with my sister," and then proceeded to drag the protesting Kasumi around the corner and out of sight, as well as hearing range.  
  
Keeping one eye on the hallway, Nabiki spoke in a low whisper. "I think something's happened to Kachi."  
  
"Yes, isn't it wonderful?" Kasumi gushed. "She's acting normal."  
  
"No, it isn't and she's not. Something's really wrong here."  
  
Kasumi shook her head. "Don't be silly. She's always been like that. She's just been having problems showing it until now."  
  
"I wouldn't say so much she's been having problems as much as been a problem, for us, I mean," Nabiki elaborated. "Although Kachi has been getting better lately."  
  
"You shouldn't call Mother by her first name, it's most improper," Kasumi said.   
  
"That's not what the problem is here," Nabiki said.  
  
"There is no problem, Nabiki. Stop acting like there is. I insist you drop this matter and let things be. Mother is obviously happy acting normal, like she used to, instead of acting like, well, an unruly, immature child since she got back."  
  
Nabiki gave her sister an incredulous look. "Sis, you do understand that the only reason she was acting that way was because she IS an immature teenager, right?"  
  
"She is not. She is our mother. Stop this silly argument right now, Nabiki."  
  
Nabiki was about to protest further when she noticed Kasumi's jaw was very firm and her stance was almost aggressive, something as alien to Kasumi as Kachiko's vacuousness was to her. Worse, there was something familiar about the look as well. It took Nabiki a moment to realize it closely mirrored when Kachiko put her own foot down regarding matters. She hadn't recognized the resemblance between parent and offspring, mostly because her older sister had never taken on such a stance, at least not in Nabiki's memory.  
  
Nabiki decided to drop the matter, at least when it came to discussing it with Kasumi. It was painfully obvious she approved of whatever had happened to Kachiko. And one couldn't argue with Kasumi. Nobody could. It was like kicking kittens and puppies around.  
  
"Let's go see how Mom's doing," Nabiki said.  
  
As she hoped, Kasumi returned to her normally placid state and agreed. The two returned to the hall.  
  
Kachiko's head was cocked quizzically. "Is everything all right? It sounded like you two were arguing. I wouldn't want you to argue. You're such close and loving sisters, it would be tragic and disruptive to the household."  
  
"You're so right," Kasumi agreed. "We're fine. Nothing's wrong. We're getting along just fine."  
  
Nabiki felt like throwing up at the sigh and delighted look Kachiko gave. It was like she was reading lines from a 'How to Behave Like A Proper and Submissive Housewife' book. Something was definitely going on.   
  
"So what shall we do next? Prepare dinner?" Kachiko asked.   
  
Kasumi said, "Actually, I was thinking we might do something else. How about we dress you up and surprise Father by having you ask him out on a date?"  
  
Kachiko drew back, obviously scandalized. "I couldn't do that. He's so... old."  
  
The reaction seemed to confuse Kasumi. "But he's your husband. It's time you started treating him as such."  
  
Kachiko made a face like she had just sucked on a lemon. "I would never marry someone in their twilight years; I'd end up a lonely widow in less than a decade. He should marry someone else, like Mrs. Saotome, except she's already married. Someone like that, though. Old, I mean."  
  
"But older men are so much more interesting," Kasumi insisted.   
  
"Absolutely not," Kachiko said firmly. "What I want in a man is someone closer to my age so we have something in common. Someone strong, who would be the man of the house, while I raise children and keep the household running. It would be the perfect joining." She sighed.  
  
"Father is all those things," Kasumi insisted.  
  
"I was actually thinking more of... Ranma," Kachiko gave a girlish giggle and blushed. "I can't believe I said that out loud."  
  
"But Ranma's engaged to Akane." Kasumi pointed out.  
  
"Ranma is supposed to marry a Tendou," Kachiko corrected. "I would be perfect for the role, and the sooner the better. I'm already seventeen, and need to plan for the future. If I haven't found a decent fiancé by the time I graduate high school, I'll probably never find one since I'll be getting too old. I'll practically be a spinster by then."  
  
Kasumi gained an uncharacteristically cross look at the unintentional insult.   
  
Kachiko was lost in a fantasy world. "And we should have children right away. I wonder if they'll look more like me or Ranma."  
  
That was it! Nabiki decided. As it stood now, this person in front of her could not be regarded as Kachiko Tendou. She ran through a list of possible reasons for the girl's sudden shift in personality. Every scenario was considered, from ghostly possession to a bump on the head and accompanying character inversion that caused the change. Nabiki had to figure out the source before she could come up with the cure. Since Kachiko would have fought with her dying breath to keep from saying the words that were coming from her mouth, and the lack of rampant destruction around the home, it meant one of two things: either the change was instantaneous or subtle.  
  
Nabiki tried to figure out when the change occurred to narrow things down. Discovering the 'when' would help determine the 'how.' Kachiko was perfectly normal early on, causing her usual brand of chaos and panic much in the same way Ranma caused his. It was only after Nabiki had awakened from her nap that the bizarre transformation had occurred.   
  
She said to Kachiko, "When did you have this sudden change of heart regarding home and marriage?"  
  
Before Kachiko could respond, Kasumi said, "Nabiki, please don't distract Mother. This is very important talk regarding Father."  
  
"Please don't call me Mother. It's very improper," Kachiko told her.  
  
Kasumi appeared hurt. "But you said it was all right."  
  
"That was before, when I was confused. Now that I don't have unimportant things cluttering up my mind, I can think more easily. You're older than me, and people would get the wrong impression and think I'm old and married if you call me Mother. That won't do at all. I need to find a good husband to take care of me, and that's nearly impossible when you have a child."  
  
It took all Nabiki had to keep from filling the room with the sound of retching at the inane talk. It wasn't just the words, it was the vacuous way in which Kachiko was saying it. The situation was intolerable.   
  
Nabiki was still considering what to do when the familiar voice of Ranma called out, "I'm home!"  
  
The effect was instantaneous upon Kachiko. She blushed furiously and hurried toward the front door, Nabiki watched as she moved in a very ladylike manner instead of the full bore run she normally would have displayed if she had wanted something that badly. Apparently the change was total, affecting even her instincts as well as conscious decisions.   
  
By the time Nabiki arrived, Kachiko was already on her knees helping a confused Ranma off with his shoes. Once she was done, she remained on her knees and nearly prostrated herself before him with her broom perched across her lap. "How was your day?"  
  
Ranma was obviously confused by both Kachiko's choice of dress and manner. "Ah, fine."  
  
"Was it eventful? You said that Mr. Hibiki person who picks on you learned some new martial arts technique and wanted to see how good it was by challenging you."  
  
The topic shifted Ranma's attitude slightly. "Yeah, well, that turned out to be a bust. It was some special pressure point he thought would send me into convulsions. What it really did was cause people to convulse in laughter. Ryouga hates feeling like he's being laughed at, so he stopped using it as soon as he figured out what it did, and I beat him easily."  
  
Kachiko rose to her feet, looping one arm in Ranma's and holding the broom in the other "Why don't you tell me all about it while I serve you lunch?"  
  
The gesture and close proximity had Ranma reacting in his usual manner by darting out of her grasp, which was surprisingly easy. "You're acting funny. What's with the get up? Did Mom make you start wearing one because you lost the fight?"  
  
Kachiko fingered her kimono mournfully. "You don't like what I'm wearing?"  
  
Nabiki could practically see the warning lights shoot off in Ranma's head, which was unusual, since he frequently missed the effect of his sometime crass words. Perhaps in this case it was more the strangeness of the reaction that had caught his attention than a sudden increase in his empathy.   
  
Quickly, Ranma said, "No, it looks okay. It's just you usually don't wear stuff like that. You're tend to be more... casual."  
  
Pride filled Kachiko's voice. "Well, I intend on being much more proper and formal from now on."   
  
"Why?" Ranma asked.  
  
"To find a good husband, of course."  
  
The way she batted her eyes at Ranma made him take a half-step back. Before he could back away out of reach, her hand darted out to ensnare his. She began to lead him away, saying, "You must be famished. Please, let serve you lunch."  
  
The talk of being fed rather than being romanced relaxed Ranma slightly, and his stomach chose to grumble at that moment. Letting his stomach take over, he allowed himself to be led to the kitchen and sat down.  
  
It was as Kachiko began setting down the trays of food she had prepared earlier that Nabiki finally noticed what was out of place; she was keeping the broom close by her side. At first, Nabiki had assumed the time lost girl was in too much of a hurry to greet Ranma and forgot to leave it behind. However, when they passed the broom closet a second time, she hadn't given it a glance. Now she was serving Ranma in an incredibly awkward way with the food in one hand and the broom in the other. She was clutching it like it was a precious treasure rather than a common household item.  
  
"I made this just for you," Kachiko beamed.  
  
Ranma's mouth watered at the sight. "Thanks. What's the occasion?"  
  
Kachiko sat across from him and stared lovingly in his eyes. "No reason."  
  
Ranma's appetite left him under that adoring stare. Sensing the time was ripe, Nabiki walked over to Ranma, leaned over to snare him by the arm, and pulled him to his feet. "There's something I need to discuss with you in private, Ranma. It's about some pictures of a certain redhead and a kendoist." She reassured her mother, "I'll bring him right back."  
  
Ranma's continuing confusion made him passive as he allowed himself to be led from the room, Kachiko's eyes following him the entire way.  
  
Once they were out of earshot, Nabiki leaned in close and whispered conspiratorially, "Okay, Saotome, I think even you can tell something's wrong with Kachi."  
  
"You're telling me. I'd say she's up to something, but I don't know what. I didn't have her pegged as this good an actress."  
  
Nabiki shook her head. "She's not. She was spouting a bunch of garbage long before you showed up. Something's changed her personality. You know all about personality changes, don't you?"  
  
Ranma shivered, remembering more than one past incident. "Okay, so what do we do about it? Hit her in the head a few times?"  
  
"While that might be therapeutic for us more than her, no. I think I have it figured out. It has something to do with the broom she's been dragging around. It hasn't left her side since I've seen her, even when she was trying to woo you."  
  
"Yeah, you're telling me. I'm starting to get uneasy with all of her batting her eyes at me and talking about marriage." Ranma shuddered at the word. "I mean, I know she's said she's interested in me before, not that I'm interested in her, of course, but I mean she's always been real clear about not wanting to get married, and she actually doesn't try stuff most of the time. And the few times she does, it's never anything serious. Now she's doing everything but grabbing on to me. It's really freaking me out."  
  
Nabiki said, "With any luck, once I get that broom from her, we'll figure out how to turn her back to normal."  
  
Ranma suddenly became suspicious. "Hey, why are you so determined to help her? If she's acting like this, I can't see you two butting heads and trying to one up each other like you usually do. I thought you might like her acting all homey and stuff."  
  
Nabiki made a sour face. "No way. It's unnatural and disturbing to see her behaving this way. Besides, she's not as big a pain as she used to be."  
  
"Sounds like you're almost buddies."  
  
The half-lidded stare Nabiki shot Ranma almost made him cringe. "Coming from anyone else, I'd make them pay, but given the sort of people you regard as 'buddies', I can see you thinking that. Now, you distract Kachi, and I'll nab the broom."  
  
Ranma agreed and the two reentered the kitchen.   
  
"What were you two doing?" There was a hint of suspicion tinged with jealousy in Kachiko's voice.  
  
"Talking about you." Ranma moved close to Kachiko and grasped her hand. "I can't help distracting you. I mean, I find you distracting," he quickly corrected. Luckily, Kachiko seemed to miss the slip. "I keep getting lost in those brown eyes of yours, which are like pools of dirty water."  
  
Even in Kachiko's altered stated of mind, she was uncertain if she was being insulted or flattered.   
  
Nabiki decided to make her move before Ranma truly bungled things. Next time she needed him to romance someone, she was playing Cyrano and feeding him the lines. But his bumbling attempts at compliments were serving the true goal: that of distraction. He had managed to gain all of Kachiko's, admittedly confused, attention. Nabiki used that opening to snatch the broom from her progenitor's grasp.   
  
The effect was instantaneous as Kachiko gasped, "Give me that back. Give me that back right now!"  
  
Nabiki bolted out of the room. Ranma tried to grab Kachiko and flatter her some more, but the girl regained some of her surprising quickness and darted away from his hand. Without pausing, she ran as fast as she could after Nabiki.  
  
Ranma was about to follow when he was forced to stop by someone that hurled themselves between him and the doorway. He was stunned by the identity of the person preventing him from moving. "Kasumi, what are you doing?"  
  
Kasumi remained where she was. "Mother has to get her broom back. Nabiki had no business taking it from her."  
  
Ranma was at a loss. He couldn't just move Kasumi. It was Kasumi. It would have been... wrong. He decided the best thing to do was reason with the girl and help her see things his way. "Kasumi, it's obvious Kachi's acting weird and that broom's probably responsible for it."  
  
"No, she's not! She behaving normal finally!" Kasumi insisted with unusual vehemence.  
  
Now Ranma thought he understood. The influence of the broom was affecting Kasumi too. Since her normal behavior was a lot like Kachiko's current one, it was hard to notice. Ranma sighed. There was only one way he could remove her from his path.   
  
"I'm sorry, Kasumi. Shoubakuten!" and he poked a spot in her stomach.  
  
Instantly, Kasumi convulsed in laughter.  
  
That gave Ranma the opportunity he needed to dart past her.  
  
xxxxxxxx  
  
The hot pursuit made Nabiki silently curse. While it was obvious the broom was the cause of the change, she had hoped removing it would also remove its influence. Obviously she was going to have to figure out something else, but only after she hid the cursed item from sight.   
  
Nabiki decided she needed to get outside. She was rapidly loosing her wind, and needed to find some place where she could hide. Just as she made a hard turn around a corner, the broom started to slip from her grasp. She caught it before it could truly fall, though the bottom scraped across the ground.   
  
"Ooooo," Nabiki said in awe as she watched the bristles play across the ground. That was sort of... fun. Perhaps she should try it again, just to see if it would produce the same effect.  
  
Xxxxxxxx  
  
By the time Ranma arrived at the scene, things had taken a turn for the worse. Now Nabiki and Kachiko were fighting over the broom, which was to be expected once Kachiko caught up, which was inevitable since Nabiki was not very quick to begin with. However, the problem was along a different line.  
  
"It's mine! Give it back to me! I want to clean with it."  
  
"No way! It's my broom! I want to sweep with it!"  
  
"It's mine!"  
  
"No, mine!"  
  
"Mine!"  
  
"Mine!"  
  
The tug of war was disturbing. Never in Ranma's wildest dreams would he have pictured those two fighting it out to clean a house. This had to stop now, before the infectious cursed item affected Akane as well.   
  
Ranma executed a running leap, snatching the bone of contention from between the two fighting girls. He then landed and leaped again high into the branches of a tree and out of the reach of anyone on the ground. Kachiko, in her right mind, would have easily been able to leap that high, but Ranma was counting on the curse to make her continue acting 'ladylike' and prevent her from accessing her martial arts skills.  
  
Both girls ran until they were directly under the branch Ranma was standing on. They looked up at him imploringly.  
  
"Give it back!" they cried out as one.  
  
"No way! It's screwing up your heads!"  
  
"We like being this way!" they said in unison again.  
  
This had to end. Since taking the broom away was doing no good, and Ranma sure as hell didn't want to get splashed with water and start acting like a 'traditional' girl, he did the only thing he could think of.   
  
He broke the broom over his knee.  
  
Both girls stared up, horrified.   
  
It suddenly occurred to Ranma that perhaps breaking the item was not the best idea in the world. After all, one might have needed it to undo the damage it already done, and now the changes might have become permanent.   
  
"You stupid !#$%!" Kachiko cried out, and leaped up.  
  
The power behind the leap easily shot her high enough in the air to be level with the distracted Ranma. A hard right fist lashed out, striking him cleanly in the jaw and knocking him from his lofty perch. He hit the ground hard, landing on his head solidly enough to leave even him stunned.  
  
The instant Kachiko landed, she was on top of him, ripping the bottom of her kimono as she straddled his waist, grabbed him by the collar, and started shaking him so fast his head was a blur.  
  
"Maybe we can tape it back together," Ranma said.  
  
"Don't be an idiot! We'll never be able to tape that broom together!" Suddenly, the desire to break Ranma in half, like he had the broom, left Kachiko. "Wait a minute, why am I getting so worked up over a broom?" She released Ranma's collar.  
  
It was almost more than Ranma could hope. "How do you feel about marrying out of high school, minding a house, and raising a family?"  
  
Kachiko gave him a look of disgust. "Look, I told you before, I still have my whole life ahead of me, and have no interest in marrying young, any guy I marry is doing half the housework, and while my opinion on children has been undergoing a bit of a change lately, I do not want any kids for a good long while. So you can just sit on that marriage proposal."  
  
Ranma released a sigh of relief. A punch to the jaw was worth things returning to the status quo. Then he realized what Kachiko had just said. "Wait a minute, I wasn't proposing."  
  
"Sure, sure, back off now after getting all caught up in the heat of the moment," Kachiko said dismissively. "I don't blame you for getting all hot and bothered. I have that effect on guys sometimes. Did you know I was once abducted by a foreign prince who wanted to marry me? Oh, sure, he thought I was Wakaba, but I taught him a lesson and made him swear not to go after her. She was so angry with his attempt, she nearly blew him up in the zeppelin that was his base of operations." Actually, Wacky Wakaba had nearly messed up and blew Kachiko up as well as the dirigible, but accidents happened. " He did try wooing me at first, but being disgustingly wealthy doesn't impress me anymore than coming from a reputable family does. I'm marrying for love or nothing. So you're going to have to work hard to impress me if you're thinking that far in the future."  
  
"What's this about Ranma proposing to Kachi?!"  
  
Ranma winced. Of course, since this was the worst possible time, Akane would appear, overhear the tail end of the conversation, and assume the worst. "It wasn't a proposal!" Not that shouting out an excuse would work, just that he had the satisfaction of knowing he tried.   
  
"It sounded like a proposal to me," Kachiko said.  
  
Akane tapped her foot impatiently, anger obviously growing.   
  
Nabiki just stood by the sidelines, relieved at not finding dusting the most fascinating thing in the world anymore.  
  
Ranma shouted, "It was not a proposal! Besides, why would I want to marry some flat-chested tomboy anyway?"  
  
Kachiko's eyebrow twitched slightly. "So, if you're interested in a quiet, traditional girl with a big rack, why aren't you asking Kasumi out?"  
  
"I didn't say I want that type of girl either," Ranma retorted.   
  
"You want someone that's bright, yet disturbingly manipulative?"  
  
Nabiki coughed irritably.  
  
"I didn't say that either," Ranma said.  
  
Kachiko let out a tired sigh. "Do you even have any idea of what you really want?"  
  
Ranma was about to snap out a reply, but stopped. He shifted uncomfortably with Kachiko still on top of him. "Well...."  
  
"You don't do you?" she pressed on.  
  
"Well...."  
  
The anger seemed to drift away from Kachiko. She stopped straddling Ranma as she rose to her feet. "At least we got that straightened out. Sakura always said 'You'll know what you're interested in when you find it and become interested'. The more I think about it, the more I'm convinced she was right. She could be pretty smart about some things. So don't let it get you down. You'll figure it out someday, just like everyone else does." She gave him a friendly pat on the head.  
  
Kachiko headed to the house, leaving a dumbfounded Ranma still on the ground. She looked over her shoulder, "By the way, thanks for helping to free me from that cursed broom." She gave Nabiki a thanks as well before reentering the house. Nabiki followed right behind her.   
  
Ranma slowly rose to his feet. That was decidedly odd. His slightly scathing commentary hadn't ended in him being swatted. He wasn't sure exactly how it ended, but it was better than usual.   
  
As he began to walk to the house, he noticed Akane had remained outside. While it was obvious she was no longer angry with him, she looked at him with an unmistakably dour expression. "You really don't know what you want, do you?"  
  
The question coming from Akane made him even more uneasy than when Kachiko had asked it in the heat of her anger. "Well...."  
  
"I see." Akane walked back into the house, obviously depressed.  
  
Ranma was left staring at her back as she retreated from his sight. He wasn't sure what to do. He wasn't even sure why she was depressed, so how could he know what it would take to cheer her up? All he knew was he hadn't done anything wrong for a change. In fact, he felt an odd sense of peace over having finally admitted (well, not in so many words, but everyone seemed to understand what he meant) certain things that had been bothering him for a while, but he had never been able to say aloud.  
  
Deciding it would be best to leave matters to themselves, it was a Ranma with mixed feelings that reentered the house to be alone for a while.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"I don't think this is necessary, Mother."  
  
"Yes, it is. Now continue."  
  
"But it seems so childish."  
  
"That's because what you did was childish. I mean really, you should test brooms to make sure they aren't cursed."  
  
"But it wasn't cursed. It worked perfectly fine."  
  
"That's enough out of you, now obey your mother. I mean really, what is it with you guys and using magical items all the time? It's like you're addicted to shortcuts or something. There are no shortcuts in life. You just have to slog through it, making mistakes, offending people, and creating enemies while doing the best that you can, just like I did. You follow that way of life, and you can't go wrong: look at how I've turned out. Stop giving me those hurt puppy dog eyes. It's not going to work this time. Now keep going."  
  
"Fine." Kasumi's retort was almost petulant as she returned to writing 'I Will Not Give People Cursed Items' five hundred times. She had been so close, too. Although now that she thought about it, she had inadvertently brought back another, less pleasant, attribute her mother had possessed when Kasumi was a child. Something she had forgotten after her mother died, opting to recall more pleasant memories and burying the bad.   
  
Punishing unruly children. Kachiko Tendou always had been good at that.  
  
xxxxxxxx  
  
[End Notes]  
  
There, you see? I haven't abandoned this. In fact, it's getting closer to the end with each chapter. I'm over the halfway point (according to the outline), and hope to have it done before the end of the year, depending on how the muse feels.   
  
Kudos to anyone picking up on the Stepford reference.   
  
Thanks for reading.  
  
And special thanks to:  
  
Rakhal for looking up the Soun Hinako thing an Chris Horton for prereading and figuring out the battle cry for the laughing point technique Ranma used on Kasumi.  
  
Also thanks to:  
  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
  
Michael Chase  
  
David Tai  
  
Chris Horton  
  
The Apprentice 


	13. The Things We Wish For Interlude 2 Part ...

The Things We Wish For...  
  
Interlude 2  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/d_b_sommer/index.html  
  
Or R+C books at:  
  
http://dbsommer.rcbooks.org  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing all of my fics, at   
  
http://dbsommer.web1000.com/dbsommer.html  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen.  
  
Forward: You can blame Abenobashi Magical District fully for this dead serious Interlude. For those that don't know AMD, it started out as a series that parodied many different genres of anime and other styles of storytelling (from mecha shows to noir to Bruce Lee chop-socky movies). However, after five episodes of pure comedy, they suddenly dropped a dead serious flashback episode with the sixth one. It explained much of what was going on in the previous episodes, but the tone was as different as night is to day. I also quickly came to the conclusion that such would be good here, at this part of the 'Things.' So don't expect much in the way of humor in this one...  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko Tendou lay on her stomach, prostrated across her bed, as she pored over a sprawl of textbooks in an effort to finish a couple of reports due in school tomorrow. While everything else in the world might have changed, homework remained the same. Boring, boring, and more boring. By now they should have developed pills that could grant a person knowledge rather than forcing them to go through the hassle of actually learning the material. What good was the future if they didn't make useful things?  
  
As Kachiko stared at the books, the text began to blur together, forming an endless, monotonous chain of words. Inexorably, she felt her neurons begin to shut down one by one. Just as her eyes started to roll into the back of her head, there was a knock on the door. The noise made her head snap up, and she welcomed the interruption. "Come in."  
  
The door opened and Kasumi poked her head into the room. "Good news, Mother. I have a gift for you." She waved a rectangular object, wrapped in shiny red paper and tied with a huge green bow that had a peacock-like fan of loops on top, in Kachiko's direction.  
  
"No thanks," Kachiko said. The last excursion into the realm of cursed magical objects was more than enough for her, and knowing this girl, she had probably stumbled upon 'The Cuisinart From Hell' or some other demonic household appliance. She swiveled her head away from Kasumi and back to the open textbook that lay in front of her. The words seemed to blur the instant Kachiko's eyes focused upon them, and her head lolled back and forth.   
  
She fought off the effects and held out her hand. "Give me it!" Her voice held a hint of panic. It no longer mattered if the present was magical. Anything was acceptable, so long as it delivered her from the drowsiness inducing objects in front of her.   
  
Kasumi crossed the floor and sat down next to her mother, blissful smile in place as she handed her the gift.   
  
Kachiko could tell from the weight and feel it was a box of some kind. She shook it once. "Clothing?" she asked.  
  
"You've very good," Kasumi said.  
  
"Ah, much better than crappy cooking or cleaning utensils. You're learning." She affectionately patted Kasumi on the head. Then the wrapping was gone in a flash and the box opened.   
  
"Oooo!" Kachiko goggled at the dress. It was a small number, fire engine red with spaghetti straps at the shoulders and a hemline that stopped before reaching halfway down her thighs. Kachiko's top and shorts were quickly discarded in favor of the new apparel.   
  
Kachiko turned to the full length mirror and admired herself. "Fits great. I like it."  
  
Kasumi gave a small clap of her hands in approval. "Are you hungry?"  
  
She rubbed her stomach. "I can use something to eat." And it would serve to keep her away from the books.  
  
Kasumi's delight doubled. "I have a dinner prepared. It's your favorite: Steak Teriyaki."  
  
Saliva nearly poured from Kachiko's mouth in Pavlovian reflex. Obviously Kasumi was trying to apologize for the broom incident. Kachiko Tendou was more than woman enough to eat the apology. "An outstanding choice of food. Lead on."  
  
Kasumi did so. The pair went down the stairs far too slowly for Kachiko's taste, with her appetite doubling as the smell of cooked steak filtered up the stairway. Her stomach rumbled as her nose basked in the scent of the rarely offered fare.  
  
Kasumi led Kachiko to the dining room. "And here we are," she said in open satisfaction.  
  
The room was cloaked in darkness, with only a pair of candles placed in the middle of the kitchen table providing illumination. The only other person in the room was Soun, who was already seated at the table. He was very formal in appearance, dressed in a black suit and tie. His mustache was neatly trimmed, and his long black hair was pulled behind his body in a stylish ponytail. He unleashed a dazzling smile to Kachiko.  
  
The boundless enthusiasm Kachiko had been displaying disappeared in an instant. Her face scrunched up, as though she had discovered something unpleasant stuck to the bottom of her shoe and was told she's be cleaning it off barehanded. "Great, there goes my appetite." She turned to leave.  
  
Kasumi placed a restraining hand on her shoulder. "But it's your favorite."  
  
Kachiko waved her hand in the air. "The ambiance is killing the mood. Some things are more disturbing than hunger pains. Creepy old guys checking you out like you're going to be on the menu is one of them."  
  
"But it's very romantic," Kasumi insisted.  
  
"Only for those close to retirement," Kachiko snapped and exited the room, heading for the front door rather than her room.   
  
Kasumi and Soun heard the time-lost girl walk into the entryway. Rather than exiting, they heard Kachiko's voice called out, "Hey, Ranma! I'm going to grab something to eat. Want to come along? I'll pay for everything."  
  
The clarion call of 'Free Food' was answered with the sound of hurried footsteps starting from Ranma's bedroom and ending at the entryway in a handful of seconds. "Why are you dressed up?"  
  
"It was a gift. Do you like it?"  
  
"Ah, well, that is...."  
  
"You do like it!"   
  
"I didn't say that!"  
  
"Ranma, there are only two types of guys that would hesitate to answer that question: those that don't like the dress and don't want to hurt a girl's feelings, and those that like the dress and are afraid saying so is some sort of commitment. You don't have the tact to be the former."  
  
"I do too have tact. I got lots of tact. Just ask anyone."  
  
Kachiko ignored the statement. "By unwittingly getting on my good side, I'll let you choose where we eat."  
  
Shifting the conversation away from Ranma's current level of tact and back to food worked in making him drop the matter. "I'm in the mood for something ethnic. There's this neat Indian place that just opened over in the shopping district. I only Indian food a couple of times traveling with Pop, but I liked it. I'll lead the way."  
  
There was the sound of the front door opening and closing, then silence.   
  
Kasumi sighed in depression at another plan failing. She turned in apology to her father. "I was so certain setting the mood like that would make mother see you in a better light. I can't believe she's so blind. And she's so stubborn. She refuses to see what's obvious to everyone else. You two are meant to be together. Why, with the way she's behaving, it's almost enough to make me believe she's not Mother at all."  
  
Soun gave his eldest daughter a soft smile. "No, she's your mother, all right. That she's so resistant to everyone's attempts proves it beyond any doubt." There was a trace of sadness underlying the words.  
  
"I don't remember her being that way at all," Kasumi insisted.   
  
Soun pulled out a cigarette and lit up. "That's because she didn't behave the same way around you girls that she did around others. She always acted differently around you for your sakes. She wanted to make sure you were raised happily, and she was always careful around you, almost like you were made of glass. She was afraid she'd earn your animosity the way her parents earned hers, and it would have devastated her if your relationship with her had turned out that way. So she was always extra patient and less... caustic, around you."  
  
"She was?" Kasumi asked.   
  
Soun nodded in confirmation. "You three were her pride and joy, so much so I think it surprised even her. There wasn't a thing in the world she wouldn't have done for you. Though if you had told her that when we first met, I think she'd have reacted much the same way as she does now. Well, perhaps not as loudly, but the sentiment would be the same."   
  
Soun's eyes took on a reflective cast as he took a long drag of his cigarette. He rose from the table and headed toward the backyard.   
  
"What about dinner, Father?" Kasumi asked.  
  
"I'm no longer hungry," he informed her.   
  
"Is there anything else you need?"  
  
"I think I'd like to be alone now."  
  
"We'll have better luck getting you back together next time," Kasumi assured him.  
  
Soun didn't answer. Instead he went out onto the back porch, sliding the door shut behind him. Alone with only his thoughts, he sat on the edge of the porch, legs over the wooden edge so they rested on the ground. He inhaled deeply, savoring the flavor of the tobacco, then exhaled upward.   
  
He gazed at the stars through the smoky haze, muting the twinkling effect they normally had. It was then something occurred to him. With his wife returned, in a manner of speaking, Soun's thoughts had been in a similar state. It was a haze in which he saw things in their general form, but lost some of the details due to the murk. Talking with Kasumi about the way Kachiko used to be had momentarily cut through that. So he stared upward at the stars and reached back into the furthest recesses of his mind to a place he rarely bothered recalling. It wasn't the best of times, but he forced himself to remember...  
  
xxxxxxxxxx  
  
Soun finished buttoning up his school uniform, paying extra attention that his collar was straight. He knew he was being overly self-conscious as he observed his image in the mirror, making certain not a hair was out of place, nor any unseemly pimples had appeared. Much to his relief, his face remained unblemished. He was as neatly groomed as he could manage. Not that he possessed features that would make any women that walked by peer closer for a second look even at the best of times, but no one regarded him as ugly or repulsive either. His looks were average, and he could easily blend into any crowd. It was both to his advantage and a liability, depending on the woman one was trying to catch. Sometimes standing out was good. Sometimes it was bad. In any case, at least he would look neat. No woman would be offended by good personal hygiene.  
  
His friend, Saotome, probably would have laughed at Soun's sudden interest in grooming. One thing Genma was not known for was keeping up appearances. Soun had not been that way either, having only a casual interest in his looks the way most youths his age did. But then things changed. It seemed that in this senior year of his, everything in his life was changing.   
  
Satisfied at his image, Soun turned away from the mirror. As he did so, his hand knocked over a tube of lipstick from the collection of make-up, perfumes, and assorted items women used to make themselves beautiful, that decorated the dresser the mirror was attached to. Not that Minato needed any of them, in Soun's opinion. He felt she used too much, but she insisted on it, saying a body that had as much wear as hers needed something to mask its mileage.   
  
Such a harsh self-assessment was beyond Soun's understanding. She was perfect to him. The one time he had stated such, and upon her realization he was being sincere, Minato had all but attacked him on the spot, ripping off his clothing and riding him like there was no tomorrow. It was one of their wilder sessions, to be certain. Wilder and memorable.  
  
Soun returned the lipstick to the top of the dresser, then shifted his gaze to something infinitely more appealing than his own average features. Minato lay on her side on the bed, staring at him as he dressed. She remained nude, though her bluish comforter was placed purposely over her lower body, giving a suggestive view of the voluptuous curves that lay underneath. Her upper body was free from any concealment, and Soun did take a moment to bask in the bountiful bosom he had snuggled against more times than could be easily counted. It took a great deal of willpower to not walk over and join her in bed once more, though this time with the purpose of merely lying against her body and relishing in its warmth instead of engaging in more energetic play.   
  
No, Soun resisted the urge his siren had unintentionally released upon him. "I really do have to go."  
  
"I'm not stopping you."  
  
While Minato's mouth insisted one thing, one of her delicate hands did the opposite, traveling up her navel to the lower portion of her bared breasts. She might have been subconsciously scratching some faint itch, but the hand seemed to beckon a return to the comfort of bed. Soun found himself forced to shift in discomfort at his body's betrayal of the course his mind had already decided.   
  
Minato seemed to sense the reaction. She gave a deep, throaty laugh. "Ah, Soun, you younger men are so single-minded. I think that's one of the things I adore about you." She rolled playfully on her back, her posture no longer as seductive as before and releasing the instinctive fixation Soun's eyes had upon her.   
  
"I'll see you the day after tomorrow, same time," Soun promised. He went through his pocket, removed his wallet, and placed a wad of bills on the dresser.   
  
Minato's eyes followed the course of his hand. An unreadable look crossed her features.   
  
Seeing the change, Soun asked, "Is that enough, or do you need more? I know your time is valuable."  
  
"Of course not. It's more than enough," she said just a touch too quickly. She rolled further still, giving her back to him.   
  
Soun was uncertain of what the gesture meant. Two months, seeing her almost four days a week for hours at a time, and he still barely understood her. This was the part he hated about relationships (even if this was the first serious one he had ever been in). Why couldn't they be more like martial arts? That was easy. You could read an opponent's body language and know exactly what they were going to do. How unfortunate the same didn't apply when it came to women. One never knew what went on in their minds from one moment to the next. He doubted even they knew what they were thinking. Minato seemed even more unreadable than most.   
  
Since Minato was a woman who spoke her mind, her refusal to mention something troubling her was for a good reason. He hoped it was anyway, and let the matter rest.  
  
Soun turned away, choosing to give his back to hers as he didn't trust himself to look at her with what he was about to inquire. He knew he had no right to ask the question, yet he had to do it all the same. "Are you going to be working any more tonight?"  
  
"No. I don't feel like it," she answered.  
  
Soun's posture seemed to firm, as though a great weight had been removed from his shoulders. He turned and could not help unleashing a wide grin, showing his delight at the answer. "Wednesday, then. I'll be counting the minutes."  
  
"I will too."   
  
Simple words. She rarely used more than was necessary. It made Soun feel at ease. He wasn't the most dynamic of conversationalists, and usually had problems maintaining one for any length of time. Save when it came to Minato. Whether they spoke for hours about nothing of consequence, or were silent, he was always comfortable in her presence. She was the only woman who had made him feel that way.   
  
Deciding it was an ideal opportunity to depart, Soun exited the small apartment, closing the door behind him and headed to the stairs. He hoped Minato remembered to lock up. The building wasn't located in the safest part of town. While the area fell short of an actual slum, it still wasn't a place people wanted to dwell in unless they had no other choice. Seediness permeated the very air, but then much of the area near the Kabukicho district was like that. He wished Minato would move somewhere safer and put his mind at ease. Of course, she had lived on her own and taken care of herself for years long before he came along, a fact she reminded him with a touch of irritation whenever he became protective, but he couldn't help himself. He wanted to know she was safe. It wasn't an unreasonable desire to be free from worrying about the one you loved, was it?  
  
Such thoughts so dominated Soun's mind that he jumped when a hand fell hard on his shoulder. Reflexively he spun out from under the grasp and brought a fist up to the face of the person who had violated his personal space so abruptly. The fist never came close as it was blocked in a blindingly fluid motion by the bearer of the hand.  
  
"Hey, easy there, Arisugawa."  
  
"Saotome." Soun breathed out a sigh of relief. Genma, his best friend in the world, had been complaining lately about not having a chance to hang around together and wanted to meet. Soun had told his friend to meet him in front of Minato's place about now. He hoped Genma hadn't been forced to wait too long. The 'rendezvous' between Soun and his lover had gone on longer than he expected. Not that he would have hurried, even if he had paid closer attention to the time. Genma might have been his best friend, but that was all he was.  
  
Genma relaxed. "What's got you so tense?"  
  
"Just worried about Minato," Soun said, looking up at the window of her apartment. He hoped to catch one last glimpse of her, but the shades were drawn.  
  
Genma rolled his eyes. It was becoming a frequent gesture around Soun. "You really need to get a grip."  
  
Soun glared at Genma suspiciously. "What's that supposed to mean?"  
  
"Just that you're taking her too seriously," Genma elaborated in as blunt a fashion as humanly possible. "I mean, I'm sure she's great in the sack, she must be since you visit her every day of the week."  
  
"It's only four days a week," Soun defended. "And sometimes only three."  
  
"You're only proving my point," Genma said. "She's a prostitute. Arisugawa, old buddy. Remember, I'm the one that introduced you to her when I decided to treat you and help you become a real man? Now I'm beginning to regret that."  
  
Soun felt his temper fraying. "What the hell are you talking about? How does this involve you?"  
  
"You're spending all your time and money on her," Genma accused in an uncharacteristically hurt voice. "We never hang around together. We hardly ever train. We never have fun. And when we do hang out, all you do is moon over her. You're acting like she's your girlfriend or something. Since I'm your friend, it's my duty to set you back on reality. She is not your girlfriend. You pay her money to sleep with her."  
  
"Her time is valuable," Soun said uneasily.  
  
Genma shook his head. "All I'm saying is, she's just a hooker, and not exactly a young one either. You're showing an unhealthy fascination with her. You need to take a step back and look at the situation objectively and realize you're obsessing about her. "  
  
"And you didn't with Ritsuko?"  
  
Genma reacted as though he had been punched. "That was a cheap shot."  
  
"And so was that crack about Minato being 'just a hooker'," Soun snapped.   
  
Just as it seemed tempers would reach a boil, Soun's shoulders slumped slightly as the anger that had been building trickled out. He could never stay angry with Genma for long. They were too close and been through too much. "I'm sorry, Saotome. I know how much she meant to you. But you have to understand, Minato means just as much to me. It's not about the sex. Sometimes we don't even sleep together. It's more than that. We spend a lot of time just talking. And when we're together, it's like there's nothing that's off limits. We'll spend hours enjoying each other's company. I've never felt so at ease with someone before. And she feels the same way. She's smiling more and more often when we're together, and she's obviously sad when I have to leave. She knows I don't care about what she does. I like her for who she is."  
  
"But you still pay her money?"  
  
"Only when we have sex." It wasn't like she had an 'official' job, and she had to eat.   
  
Genma held up his hands in defeat. "Fine, be that way. I'm only trying to give you some solid advice, and I'm the only one that's man enough to do it. You've got your head in the clouds and don't have a grip on the situation. As your friend, I have to warn you and try to keep things from getting messy, like the Yukari matter. Remember? I warned you about that too, but did you listen? No. And look at what happened."  
  
Soun stared embarrassingly at the ground. "That was two years ago. I fully admit to being young and foolish back then. Besides, some good came of it. It was a learning experience on what not to do with a woman. I'd recognize it if it was happening again. This is different from that situation in every way."  
  
"If you say so," Genma said without even pretending it was more than lip service. "So, now that we finally have a chance to hang out together, what do you want to do?"  
  
Soun laughed embarrassingly. "I'm afraid I don't have time to do anything. There's a family meeting with my parents tonight. They want to talk to me about something 'important'," he emphasized the last word as though the meaning behind it was the opposite of the definition.  
  
Genma grimaced. "Okay. That I can accept as a reason for why you don't have the time to hang out. Any idea what horrors they're planning to unleash upon you this time?"  
  
Soun found himself irritated at Genma's attitude. Not that he was wrong about the fate Soun's parents undoubtedly had planned for him, just that his friend would blurt it out. "No, but I heard my brother's name mentioned a few times last night." The name of Ryuunsuke never slipped past his parents' lips unless it was about something serious. And 'serious' usually meant 'terrible' for Soun on a personal level.   
  
"Ooo, that is bad," Genma agreed. "I'll steer clear for the next couple of days. No point in adding fuel to the fire."  
  
Soun was relieved. His parents didn't approve of Genma, claiming he was a bad influence and too low born to be seen with-- as though the Arisugawa bloodline was anything to be proud of itself. They might have been at one time, but Soun's maternal grandfather had gambled and drank away the family fortune. Since then, Kentaro and Michiru Arisugawa held a very unhealthy preoccupation with increasing their family's prominence, which is what made Ryuunsuke's actions so unacceptable. Sometime Soun envied his older brother. Shamed or not, at least he had made it out of that damned household and away from his parents' suffocating control.  
  
Noting Soun's onset of depression, Genma took on a more jovial attitude in an attempt to cheer his friend. "I have some news which might brighten your day."  
  
"Oh?"   
  
"You know that mysterious master that everyone talks about? The one I've been trying to find? I uncovered some more information about him."  
  
"Are you talking about the one that always seems to be in trouble with the law?" Soun asked with a decided lack of enthusiasm.  
  
"Bah, it's all rumor and innuendo," Genma scoffed. "I'll bet he hasn't done half the things he's been accused of. I mean really, a serial panty thief? It's preposterous."  
  
"True." Soun admitted. There was no way someone reputed to be as powerful and knowledgeable of the martial arts as this mysterious figure could possibly be so perverted.  
  
Genma continued. "Anyhow, I was hanging around this bar, listening to people talk, and I heard his name mentioned. I asked this guy that dropped the name about it, and after pumping a few drinks into him, he confessed that he had heard a couple of fellows claiming to have been this master's students. Apparently they had just escaped from him, and were getting drunk in celebration. The guy I was talking to managed to share a few drinks with them."  
  
"Escaped?"  
  
"A fancy way of saying they ran out on him, probably because his techniques are so powerful they couldn't endure the training required to learn them," Genma stated contemptuously.  
  
Soun shook his head worriedly. "I don't know, Saotome. The more I hear about this master, the more I don't like about it. Maybe we should just forget about seeking him out and asking him to teach us."  
  
Now it was Genma's turn to look askance at his comrade. "I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that. You know you've been just as frustrated as me. We've hit the wall. Sensei Tanaka said he taught us all he could, and he doesn't know anyone around here that's a better teacher than him. We have to improve in the art. It's the path a true martial artist must take!"  
  
"That is true," Soun admitted. Genma had a point. Sensei Tanaka had said that he and Genma were prodigies and had learned everything the old man had to teach in record time. Without someone to press them, neither he nor Saotome was getting any better. The only way to improve was to find a better teacher than the one they had, which had led to Saotome's quest for this mysterious figure who was said to be one of the most powerful martial artists in Japan.   
  
There was a time when improving in martial arts was all Soun had wanted. It was the only truly bright point in his dismal life, besides his friendship with Saotome. But now there were other considerations. Something that made the martial arts seem like a black hole next to the nova-like glow it possessed. Something that made the art seem almost silly by comparison.  
  
Genma had an uncharacteristically determined look on his features. "You're still in this with me, right, Arisugawa? You still want to hook up with this guy and have us taken on as his disciples?"  
  
"Of course," Soun said, mostly to placate his friend rather than out of any burning desire of commitment. Besides, Soun doubted this 'Happosai' character really existed, or if he did, that he as good as the rumors claimed. Even if he was, there was no guarantee he was looking for students. No, the odds of this dream of Genma's panning out were like most of the other plans the man had: a hundred to one at best.  
  
Missing the undertones of Soun's lip service, Genma slapped his friend on the back. "All right. I'll keep searching for this guy. You have good luck with those folks of yours. Maybe they're going to get off your back and let you live a little for a change."  
  
Soun accepted his friend's well wishes. His becoming a 'serial panty thief' was more likely than his parents allowing him to live his life in peace.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Soun traveled up the stairs to his family's modest apartment. It was the third move down in their standard of living. The small reserve of cash his mother had inherited had dwindled down to nothing, and they had to live solely on the income the pair generated.   
  
It was not always that way. In the beginning, the Arisugawas had lived relatively well. Soun vaguely remembered the house they had owned when he was a youth. Last year he was in a nostalgic mood and had hunted it down, only to discover it was nowhere near as large as it appeared in his memories. Still, to a child of five, the structure had seemed enormous. And it had a yard. That he had remembered in excruciating detail. He and his brother had played in it for hours at a time, and only reluctantly conceded to coming indoors when it was time for meals. No weather was too adverse for playing outside. That was probably the thing he missed the most; having a yard. When he made it big as a teacher with a dojo of his own, he'd buy a house with a yard. Even if he was too old to frolic in it as he had in his youth, he'd still sit out in the back and gaze outside, enjoying the open area and greenery while his children had a chance to enjoy their childhood with some space they could call their own.   
  
The people that had suffered the most under the Arisugawa family's loss of status were Soun's parents. Neither of them had jobs that paid very well, and neither was talented enough to ever rise through the ranks of their respective businesses. In many ways they were the opposite of Soun and his martial arts. He had gone as far as others could teach him; his parents had learned as much as they could, despite there being more to be taught.  
  
Once it became obvious the couple would never manage to live in the affluence they had been raised in, they shifted their attention to preparing for a comfortable retirement. The only way they would accomplish that goal was to see to it their children gained that money somehow, and then naturally take care of their parents once they became older. Oh, they contended what they were really doing was looking out for their offspring's welfare, but Soun and his brother had learned the truth of the matter long ago. It was so low. If Soun ever had children, he would never try to leach off them that way. He would truly look out for their well being and try to set them up solely for their own good, rather than his. Of course, he needed to settle down before he could have children. And to do that, he would need a good woman whom he loved, and who loved him in return.   
  
Such thoughts, as well as the reluctance to return home, made Soun take twice as long to traverse the stairs to the fourth floor and his apartment. Seeing he had arrived, he took a deep breath and turned the handle. The door opened. That meant his parents were home, and the fantasy he had for missing the meeting died a painful death.  
  
"I'm home!" Soun announced.   
  
"Come here, Son," his father's voice boomed.   
  
Soun removed his shoes and headed to the living room/kitchen. Cozy was one way to describe the apartment. Cramped was another, more accurate one. The place was so small, and packed tight with so many objects, that it looked more like a flea market run amuck than a place where people could live. At least Soun had a room to himself thanks to his brother's departure.  
  
Entering the living room, Soun felt his guts twist in a knot at the pleasant smiles his parents wore. When they smiled like that, with their toothy, feline grins, it usually meant there was some scheme they had in store for him.  
  
"Sit." His mother indicated across the table from where she sat next to her husband.  
  
As Soun obeyed, he noticed a manila folder placed midway between his parents. The edge of a large photograph poked out from the corner. The knot in his stomach tightened. "What is it you wanted to discuss?" he said as formally as he could manage, his eyes not quite able to leave the folder.  
  
"We have good news, Son," his mother answered.   
  
That was an ominous sign. Usually his father spoke first. When his mother did, it meant she had been the primary force behind whatever plan they had cooked up. Her schemes tended to be the worse of the pair's.   
  
"Yes?" Soun got out.  
  
Michiru opened the folder and pulled out the picture, sliding it across the table and turning it so it was pointed correctly in Soun's direction. The photo was a close up of the face of a teenager, probably around Soun's age, with curly brown hair. She was pretty, rather than beautiful, even with the dour expression she wore. Easy on the eyes, but not the sort that if he had walked past her, he would have taken a second glance. The photograph ended right above the chest area, and he could tell she wore a formal, if somewhat sedate, kimono. Besides that, there was nothing notable about the girl, nor did he recognize her.  
  
It was obviously a formal photograph, one that had clearly been taken by a professional, and was intended to show off to others, rather than one that had been shot on the spur of the moment. Presumably it was meant to show a happy person, but Soun could tell the girl was dour, and that this wan smile was the best she could manage when the photo had been taken. He suspected that had a photographer suddenly appeared in the room and plopped down in front of him to take such a snapshot, he would have an identical expression.   
  
Still mystified at the purpose behind showing him the photograph, Soun looked at his mother curiously, waiting for an explanation.  
  
"So, what do you think of her?"  
  
This was bad. When his mother played the question game instead of explaining things, it was always very, very bad. "She seems nice." That was neutral enough. Obviously his mother was happy with the girl for some reason, and stating something negative would have been an unwise choice. But Soun wasn't foolish enough to say anything extravagant that could be used against him later.   
  
His mother gave a small clap of her hands, and his father nodded approvingly.   
  
Michiru said, "Excellent. I'm so pleased she meets with your approval. We'll have a formal meeting the day after tomorrow and finalize the arrangement between the two of you."  
  
The fear in his stomach relocated to his voice. "What? What arrangement is this?"  
  
"Your betrothal arrangement, of course," Michiru answered delightedly.  
  
"What?!" Soun cried out. This time his parents had ambushed him but good. He had never seen a marriage plan in the works. They had always been pushy in the past, but never to this degree.   
  
His father's pleased face suddenly became merciless stone. Kentaro was a wide, tall man with a booming voice. Even when seated, he could be an imposing figure. "Your mother and I have been busy planning for your future, since you seem reluctant to do it. We have found a suitable woman for you to marry. You'll be out of high school in a couple of months. It'll be time to get on with your life by settling down and starting a family."  
  
His mother interjected herself, cutting off Soun's attempt at a reply. She held up the photo and some papers. "Kachiko comes from a very well bred family and has an impeccable background. She'd make a wonderful wife and mother to your children."  
  
Kentaro nodded. "We checked her out thoroughly. Like us, her parents are looking out for their child's welfare. They were trying to find a prospective husband, and they chose you. That means they already find you acceptable. We were really quite fortunate they came to us, rather than the other way around. All you have to do is not screw up, and your future will be assured."   
  
Soun wanted to ask how this mysterious family had found his name to choose from, but then realized his parents had been responsible. Most likely they had placed his name with every matchmaker in Tokyo in the hopes of bartering him off to someone with some money.  
  
Michiru filled the pause in the conversation with more facts. "Her father is a martial arts teacher. He's getting on in years, and Kachiko is his only child. He wants someone to carry on his family's art. Since you've indicated you want to become a teacher yourself, it's a perfect match. He even has a dojo."  
  
Kentaro said, "Since they are quite prominent, she's his only offspring, and it is his family's art, you'll have to take on their name. But that's a small price to pay for this sort of deal."   
  
"We're all so very fortunate," Michiru agreed.   
  
That was all Soun can take. This went far beyond anything they had previously attempted. They weren't merely trying to influence his life, like when they tried to persuade him to become a doctor, they were dictating it. Worse, it wasn't ending with a mere career; they were planning out the course his entire existence would take.  
  
In times past Soun would have caved in and grimly accepted their judgment, bawling about it over drinks with Genma afterwards. He was willing to admit he didn't have much of a spine. But that was before there was something important in his life. No, something more important than his life.  
  
Minato.   
  
Drawing on the memory of her and everything they had experienced, he found the courage to stand up to his parents for the first time in his life.   
  
Soun slammed his hand down on the table, nearly splitting it in two with the force behind the blow. "Stop behaving as though I'm not here! I am not marrying some girl I've never even met!"  
  
"That's what the meeting the day after tomorrow is for, Son," Michiru explained, a hint of iron already in her voice. Obviously resistance had been anticipated and prepared for.   
  
"I don't give a damn! I refuse to partake of this absurdity!"  
  
Kentaro straightened up as he leaned forward. In a firm unyielding voice, he said, "Listen to me, Son. I will make myself clear to you. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for you. You don't even have to do anything. Oh, you'll have to teach martial arts, which is what you want to do anyway, so this is all you could possibly want in life. Everything is being handed to you. All you have to do is accept it."  
  
"And marry some girl I don't even know!" Soun bellowed.   
  
"She's a good girl. Your mother and I looked into that, since it did seem that things were too good to be true. But it's not. Obviously this is a move on the Tendous' part to secure their future. They're both over sixty now, and want to ensure their family honor is taken care of before they pass on."  
  
"And it's a house you can move into once they're dead," Soun said acidly.  
  
Michiru's eyes bulged in disbelief, while Kentaro's reaction was to slam his own fist down on the table, making it jump as high as Soun had. "Listen to me, boy. Your brother has already failed this family. Your mother and I will not allow you to disgrace it as well."  
  
Soun looked upon his father in contempt. "Oh yes, how disgraceful that he should marry a poor woman. That he loved her had nothing to do with it."  
  
"Her grandfather was Korean!" Michiru spat.  
  
"If she had money, you would have been more than happy to hug her to your bosom," Soun retorted. "You're transparent. You're not worried about lineage; you're worried about who will take care of you after you retire. Ryuunsuke sure as hell can't afford it, so you're going to make sure I can. But I am not your puppet. I will not marry this girl!"  
  
Kentaro drew himself up to his full height, towering over the still seated Soun. "You will marry this girl or else you will never darken this doorway again! Do you hear me?! I'll remove your name from the family register myself!"  
  
Soun shot to his feet, meeting his father's burning glare. "I would consider it a blessing if you did so."   
  
Soun turned away then, not trusting his ability to quell the urge to pummel his father into unconsciousness. As large as Kentaro was, he had no fighting skills whatsoever. He was all bark and no bite. Soun had taken down men even larger in the course of his life, and could easily have dispatched his father if he so chose. But under these circumstances, that would not change his father's mind. Stubbornness to the point of stupidity was a trait that ran through both parents, and Soun only hoped it had somehow bypassed him. He rose to his feet and walked away, not even bothering to head toward his room. Instead he went directly toward the front door and walked out of the apartment and into the world beyond.   
  
For the first time in his life, Soun felt free.  
  
Xxxxxxxx  
  
"Wow, I'm impressed, Arisugawa. I didn't think you had it in you." Genma whistled appreciatively.  
  
"I couldn't allow it, Saotome. Not this time," Soun said, reconfirming his belief that he had made the right choice. Now that he had a chance to cool down, he took a moment to consider what he had done. He hadn't been the only one firm in his beliefs. Both of his parents had a look in their eyes that suggested they were deadly serious this time, and there would be no relenting. Casting him out of the family had been no idle threat; it was an admission of their desperation.  
  
As much as Soun hated them and their manipulations, he still loved his parents deeply. There were happier times, earlier in their lives. His parents hadn't always been so eager to exploit their children. It was only as their money dwindled that they became increasingly frantic for some way out that the desperation seeped in. In their own perverse way, his parents did care about him, and Soun had no doubt they really were considering his own well-being in their plans as well. He knew they still missed Ryuunsuke, and cared about him. But that damned stubborn streak would never allow him back in their lives unless he abandoned his wife, and Soun knew his brother would sooner die than ever consider that. His parents knew that too, which was why the stalemate would probably continue until one side was dead. That stubbornness also meant they would do exactly what they threatened if Soun didn't cave into their demands.   
  
And once Soun cooled off, he realized that under different circumstances, he would have done just that. Being all alone on his own would have been too much for him to bear. His brother would be willing to take him in, but Ryuunsuke had no money, and Soun swore he would never be a burden to a man who had sacrificed so much for his ideals. There was no way out there.  
  
Only one thing gave Soun the courage to go on, the nerve to risk everything to stand on his own. Alone, he would be unable to do it, but with her at his side, he became a man greater than he could ever have on his own.   
  
"Are you sure you want to do this, Arisugawa?"  
  
Soun sighed. His friend was not being entirely supportive (not counting the fact he was letting Soun stay with him until the matter was resolved). It wasn't out of any lack of friendship --he had no doubt Genma would risk his life for his friend's welfare, if he was ever pressed about it and had no other recourse-- rather it was Genma couldn't quite seem to grasp the concept of WHY Soun was doing it.   
  
"I am certain," Soun assured him.  
  
"But it does sound like a cushy deal," Genma reminded him. "I mean, your own dojo. And you said she was sort of cute. You'd be set for life. I know I'd take them up on it."  
  
"What if you had a choice between her and Ritsuko?"  
  
That made Genma reconsider, which alone was a testament to his feelings for the girl from his past. "No, but I'd have seriously considered it. I probably would have dumped any other girl I dated for the opportunity."  
  
"Well, at least you're honest with yourself," Soun said. Genma Saotome was many things. Having a high level of integrity might not have been one of them, but admitting to the ease that he could be tempted by material things, he could manage.  
  
"But it's not exactly like that with you," Genma pointed out. "It's not as if there's someone you're involved with."  
  
Soun scowled at him.  
  
The light came on in Genma's head. "Oh come on. You can't be serious. She's a prostitute."  
  
"I don't care what she did, Saotome. And don't make it sound so dirty. It's not like you haven't slept with a few. Doesn't that make you just as bad?"  
  
"Sleeping with a hooker is one thing; bringing them home to show off to mother is another."  
  
"I love her," Soun reaffirmed.   
  
"You're going to have to mooch off her. You have no money. You've been spending it all on her, which means she has it. Actually that might be something in your favor, now that I think about it. You'll be getting it back, in a roundabout way," Genma admitted.   
  
Soun looked conspiratorially around Genma's bedroom. Ascertaining no one else was present, he leaned in close and whispered in his friend's ear. "Actually, I have some money saved up."  
  
"Money? Where did you get it?"  
  
"I had a job as a towel boy at the 'Blue Oyster Bathhouse' last year."  
  
"The gay bathhouse?!"  
  
Soun made a hushing motion with his hand. His employment there was not something that was common knowledge, nor did he want it to be.  
  
"You were just a towel boy there, weren't you?" Genma asked, suddenly uneasy around his friend.  
  
"Of course!" Soun snapped. "It's just a lot of the gentleman there were very good tippers."   
  
Genma pinched Soun's cheek. "And no doubt they showered you with money because you're so adorable."  
  
Soun swatted the hand away. "I had that deposited in my own private account. There's a tidy sum of money there. Enough to help two people get by until they get on their feet. All I have to do is withdraw it tomorrow, then ask Minato to come with me. Between the two of us, I'm sure we'll have enough to start a new life together."  
  
Genma shook his head pitifully. "It sounds to me like you have your head in the clouds, but what the heck. It's obvious you want this, and if it's what will make you happy, you have my full support." He slapped Soun affectionately on the back.  
  
"Thanks," Soun said sincerely. At least someone was backing him. Even if it was only for moral support, it was a big help. It would help bolster Soun's courage to face a very uncertain future. It was great to have a friend like Genma.  
  
"Hey, Arisugawa?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Do you think this Tendou girl is still available?"  
  
Soun rolled his eyes. At least he could count on one thing: Saotome would never change.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Soun took a deep intake of breath as he paused in front of the door to Minato's apartment. This was the moment of truth. It had taken the better part of the day to do all the smaller steps necessary to prepare the way for what he was about to propose to her. Most of them probably could have been skipped over, but he had used them as a delaying tactic. Soun was genuinely frightened. After today, everything changed. He would no longer be the man he was before stepping foot in his parents' apartment for what had been the last time. Nor could he ever go back to the somewhat carefree youth of yesterday. Now he took on the responsibilities of a man, and everything it entailed. It was a sobering thought, and more than a little terrifying. It had taken all day to firm his resolve to travel to Minato's building and force his feet to carry him up the flight of steps and to her door.  
  
There were no more excuses now. No more delays. Such would be cowardice in the face of the one person to whom he would never appear cowardly. He brought his hand up to the door and knocked. "Minato, it's me."  
  
There was no response. That was unusual. Minato always stayed in on Tuesdays. It was her night off. In all her years, she had never forced herself to work that day. He supposed she could have gone out to a restaurant, but usually she ate in. It was always possible a friend had dropped by and invited her somewhere, but in the past she admitted to him that she had few of those. Acquaintances, perhaps, but not true friends, like Soun was. And even then he made it a point to never bother her on Tuesday's, leaving her to her own devices and giving her some space rather than smothering her in his attention. Besides, if he kept their contact to the days she usually worked, he wouldn't have to worry about her being with other men.  
  
He rapped on the door a second time, more forcefully than before. Again there was no response.   
  
Soun placed his hand next to the door. Underneath the sealed wood, he swore he could somehow feel her presence in the room. It wasn't a martial arts technique; it was from the link that was formed between two people who shared everything together.  
  
"Minato, please open the door," Soun all but pleaded.   
  
For a moment, all was silent. Then a voice called out, "Come in. It's unlocked"  
  
Soun breathed a sigh of relief and opened the door. He would reproach her later about leaving it unlocked. But that was unimportant, at least for now.   
  
His eyes fell on her as he entered the room. She was sitting in a chair next to a desk that was set against the far wall, her back to him. An empty bottle of sake was lying on its side, and a glass that contained a tiny trace of the clear fluid along its bottom sat next to her hand.  
  
As Soun watched her sit motionlessly, he breathed a sigh of relief. Every nagging doubt, wondering if this was the best thing for both of them, was laid to rest. He was taking the right course of action. They were meant to be together for the rest of their lives.  
  
It was time to use speech he had spent hours mentally preparing. "Sorry to trouble you on your day off, but something important has come up. I had been considering this for some time, but only recently found the resolve to do it, even if I knew it was the right thing to do." He was starting to babble. He hadn't meant to do that. It made him sound childish and stupid.  
  
Minato remained quiet. Soun felt that was for the best. He could finish his speech uninterrupted.   
  
"In the short time we've known each other, you've come to mean to me more than any person I have ever met. I'm not talking about the sex, which is great, mind you, it's the talks we have, sharing our dreams and thoughts with one another. It's the quiet moments, where we simply enjoy the presence of one another and a sort of peace settles over us. It's when we eat, or when we laugh, or when we lay together after having made love. It's everything. You make me see the world like it's a new, wonderful place I never noticed before. When I'm not with you, everything feels dark, and pointless, like there's a light missing from my life. The emotions I have when we're together, it's like nothing I've ever felt before, and I can't help but think you feel the same way I do.  
  
"We belong together. I want to take you away from all of this. I want to take care of you for the rest of our lives. Let's do it. Let's leave this place and go where no one knows us. We'll start a new life together, just you and I."  
  
Minato didn't move through the entire conversation. She remained seated where she was, back to Soun, not a whisper passing from her lips.  
  
Soun glanced at her worriedly. He was certain she would have accepted his proposition by now. She had to understand how he felt. She had every other time they had talked, and never before had he bared his heart and soul so openly. Not to anyone in his eighteen years of life. It was only the feelings she evoked that gave him the ability to speak the words.  
  
Still she remained unmoving. Silent.  
  
"Say something," Soun begged.   
  
There was no reaction, as though she had not heard the words. Then she shifted slightly, her body tensing. Her arm came up across her face, then settled back down to her side. Finally, she turned to look at the man who had opened his heart to her.  
  
Soun was taken aback by the look of amusement on her features. She wore a smile that was closer to a sneer with the way her lip curled. And in her eyes, an emotion he had never seen before, at least from her. It took him a moment to recognize it as contempt.  
  
Minato laughed. Laughed at him. "Oh lord, I should have seen this one coming."  
  
"What do you mean?" Soun was barely able to ask.  
  
"You." Minato indicated with rude, waving gesture. "I should have known this was happening. I've never had it happen to me before, but some of the other girls warned me about guys like you. I guess I shouldn't be surprised at missing it. None of my regulars have ever been as young as you, so I didn't recognize the signs."  
  
Soun shifted uncomfortably at the casual mention of the other men she slept with. It was a topic she had never broached with him, and he had no desire to learn about. "What do you mean?"  
  
Minato waved her glass in his direction. "Some young kid starts getting a regular piece of ass for the first time in his life and right away mistakes it for that 'true love' crap. I mean, you were still coughing up the cash without trying to get discounts or something, so I figured you were okay with it. I had no idea you had it this bad."  
  
Soun couldn't believe his ears. How could she be so casual about all they had shared, like it meant nothing? "It is love. I've had crushes before, girls I thought I was in love with. But not like this. It was never like this. You've shown me what it means to truly care about someone."  
  
Minato rolled her eyes. "And you've shown me the inside of your wallet, and I was happy to take what was there. That is what we were doing, you know? It was a business transaction, Soun. That's all it ever was. I mean sure, I laid on the charm, and listened to your rambling and stuff. I like going that extra distance for the customer so he really enjoys things. It also keeps them coming back, let me tell you, and a regular that doesn't stiff you is always a guy to be treasured."  
  
"Y... You can't mean, you c... can't think of me like..." His throat constricted, choking him up and leaving him unable to finish the sentence.  
  
Minato did it for him. "See you as just another customer? I'm afraid so. A nice guy, one of the nicest ones I met. Real sweet, in an innocent teenager sort of way. But if you're looking for some sort of deep emotional attachment, sorry. That ain't the way I play the game."  
  
"But everything we talked about. You told me so much about yourself."  
  
"I made it up," she snapped, though more at the dresser than at Soun, as her head shifted slightly. It took several seconds for her former, casual (if somewhat contemptuous) demeanor to return. "Look, you were running off at the mouth. I told you what you wanted to hear."  
  
"But-"  
  
"Save it," she snapped again. "I'm telling it like it is. You don't want to believe it, that's your fault, not mine.   
  
"You mean-"  
  
"It was all an act. You just bought into it more than you were supposed to. If I had realized it, I would have gone easier on you," Minato interrupted before he could continue. As she looked at him, her countenance softened, becoming one of compassion. "Look, I'm going to do you a favor. You're a sweet guy, and really deserve something nice to come along. I'm not going to string you along like a lot of other girls would do in my position. I'm cutting you off. No more sex. No more contact. We'll put this behind us as serious miscommunication and leave it at that. Trust me, it's for the best."  
  
"A... miscommunication," Soun repeated, still not quite believing his ears.  
  
"Yeah, that's for the best," she repeated. "Look, I'm sorry to cut things short, but you got to get out of here."  
  
Still in shock, Soun stared at her mutely.  
  
"I've got to work."  
  
"It's Tuesday," he said, his voice as emotionless as though he was reading lines from a script.  
  
She hesitated a moment before explaining, "I'm making an exception today for an out-of-towner that's come by for a couple of days. I'm going to take Friday off instead. Now you go on, get out of here," she insisted as she grabbed him by the hand and tugged him toward the door.  
  
Soun could have resisted, could have stayed and forced her to explain herself further, but he had no energy left. The emotional turmoil he had been in the throes of since yesterday, the lack of any sleep, the fear of the unknown future, had eaten away at him until Minato's confession devoured everything. He barely had enough energy to allow himself to be led out the door. Once out in the hall, Minato slammed the door shut behind him. He heard the tumbler of the lock click into place. Somewhere in a distant corner of his mind, he noted that now he didn't have to remind her to lock her door as he had originally planned.  
  
It was over. Just like that. All of his hopes, his dreams of a lifetime of happiness were washed away in a span of less than five minutes. How could he have been so wrong? How could he have misread the signs so badly? He was so certain they had shared something special, something that only came along once in a lifetime, if that. But instead it was all a lie. A fantasy. Minato was correct. He was a gullible, lovestruck teenager who had wanted to believe in something greater than himself so badly that he had gouged his own eyes out to blind himself from the reality.   
  
Despite that knowledge, even when he went over everything in his mind, Soun couldn't point to a single moment where he should have seen through Minato's deception. How could she have woven a tapestry of illusion so flawlessly that even in hindsight he couldn't see past it? Was he as stubborn as his parents, refusing to accept an obvious truth?  
  
And even if all she had said was true, he couldn't understand her callous disregard for his feelings. Even if they weren't reciprocated, why had she been so casual in all but destroying him? She was a caring woman, somewhat cynical, but he had seen her go out of her way to be kind to others, even total strangers. She could have let him down more gently. Certainly, it would have taken longer to convince him he was wrong, and perhaps he would have had an opportunity to make her see things his way, but no. It was almost as though she had always planned to crush his heart savagely, and was merely waiting for the right opportunity. It contradicted everything he knew about her.  
  
Soun couldn't understand the why of things, and had no strength left to ponder the matter. He was tired. Tired beyond anything he had ever experienced before in his life. All the martial arts training in the world combined could not drain him so completely. He was so exhausted, he feared he would never feel alive again. He wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. He couldn't think. He couldn't even summon enough emotion to have more recriminations. She was correct. He needed to leave. Maybe he'd go home. Or maybe he'd step in front of a bus. Nothing mattered anymore. Not really.  
  
As Soun started down the stairs, there was a loud noise behind him, originating from Minato's apartment. It sounded like glass breaking as it was hurled against something hard. For a moment, Soun instinctively turned to investigate, but then he stopped. Minato had made her feelings clear. She felt nothing for him, and wanted him out of her life. And he lacked the heart to see her again. It would break him as surely as falling off Mount Fuji would. He just knew it.   
  
And so he left the building, leaving the first true love of his life behind forever.  
  
Xxxxxx  
  
It was a defeated shell of a man, once known as Soun Arisugawa, that returned to his apartment around two in the morning. As he entered the living room, he saw his parents were still up, obviously waiting for him. He wasn't surprised. Surprise required emotion, and he had none left.   
  
"I'll meet the girl tomorrow."  
  
And he went to bed, collapsing exhausted into a dreamless limbo.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
End part A 


	14. The Things We Wish For Interlude 2 Part ...

Soun found himself impressed with the house. While not truly old, it had the feel of a place that had seen generations of family that called it 'home'. It was constructed professionally, appealing to the eye, and expansive, far larger than the house Soun had grown up in. It made him feel at ease, as though it was a glove that fit his hand comfortably. It was the first time in the last twenty-four hours that anything had allowed his soul feel the slightest bit of serenity.  
  
The pain was still enormous. It had been a grueling day from the moment his eyes had opened. Upon awakening, Soun wondered why he should bother rising from bed. The world held nothing for him. It was a vast wasteland filled only with emptiness lacking any meaning. He lived. He still breathed. People were still out there. Everything was the same on the outside. It was the inside that was dead. He was no longer a thing that was alive, he merely existed.   
  
He lay there until his parents prodded and urged him to prepare for the meeting with his future wife. He could offer no protest. Marry the Tendou girl or not marry her; it was the same thing. So, without enthusiasm or hesitation, he went through the motions that he was instructed to do. By the late afternoon, he and his family had arrived at the Tendou residence, and the meeting began.  
  
As Soun sat at the table before the Tendous, he found himself wanting to shift in discomfort at the traditional kimono his parents had insisted he wear. It was new, having been purchased by his parents the day before, since they wanted to make a good first impression with their potential moneymakers. The material itched, and it took employing strict martial arts' discipline to keep from squirming in his seat. Fidgeting was bad for the meeting, or so his parents had harped on up until their arrival at the home.   
  
Staring across the expanse of the stern wooden table, Soun finally took a moment to carefully look over the two older members of the Tendou family who, hypothetically, were going to become his in-laws. He tried recalling their names and failed. He just hadn't paid any attention to his parents when they briefed him on the details of the situation. What difference did it make, anyway?   
  
The couple were obviously older, their hair long since having turned gray with only the man having a few remaining strands of black that were fighting a losing battle with time. The woman appeared even older, thin and frail despite the beautiful kimono she wore. Their advanced age made the youth of their daughter a surprise.  
  
Seated directly across from Soun was the girl, Kachiko. He estimated her to be around his age. Her hair was cut short, though in a feminine manner. A part of his mind marked her appearance as cute, though she paled to the beauty that was Minato. Kachiko was also of a far more slender build, whereas Minato was voluptuous. She was youth where Minato was maturity. The one time she had spoken during the introductions, Soun found she had a high-pitched voice, while Minato's held a husky, sensual purr in every word. She was the exact opposite of Minato in every way. Soun couldn't decide if that was a good or bad thing.   
  
Like her mother, Kachiko wore a lovely kimono that fit her demure frame nicely. Despite Soun's depressed state, his martial arts skills were too finely honed to have disappeared entirely. Automatically, he noted that the girl shifted frequently, as though she was as uncomfortable in her outfit as he was in his. Or perhaps it was the situation that was the cause of her discomfort. He couldn't tell. He didn't care enough to think about it. What was going to be, was going to be. Judging by the way the conversation between the families was proceeding, matters would be decided soon.  
  
In the beginning, the conversation had been stilted and formal, with the Tendous asking many questions (actually, the parents asked, while Kachiko remained quietly sitting next to her mother as a 'proper' girl would). They had expressed some reservations early on, but then the tone of the meeting changed as the Tendou woman (Soun felt a prick of irritation at still not remembering the name) had suffered through a hard coughing fit. Her husband was openly concerned while tending to her to the point of almost overreacting. It had interrupted the meeting for several minutes, until the woman caught her wind.   
  
To Soun, in the dour mood he was in, the old woman reeked of decay, like many her age. He wagered by the lack of surprise, in relation to the concern, that it was unlikely this was the first coughing fit she had suffered through, nor would it be the last. Or perhaps it was merely his depression coloring everything black. It was hard to tell, and even more difficult to care.   
  
The discussion had taken a sense of urgency from the Tendou side after that. Whatever wariness they had displayed upon examining Soun disappeared shortly after, and matters flowed along more smoothly, much to the delight of his own parents.  
  
An elbow in the side jostled Soun out of his reverie. His mother had delivered it. It took him a moment to realize she had been talking to him.  
  
"I said, why don't you get better acquainted with Kachiko while we continue talking?"   
  
Though posed as a question, Soun knew better. He nodded.  
  
"An excellent idea," said Kachiko's mother.   
  
Soun thought he noticed a scowl of anger flash Kachiko's features. It was so fleeting, he was uncertain as to whether he actually saw it or if it was imagination. It did pique his curiosity ever so slightly. Why would the girl be angry at spending time with what was to be her future husband?  
  
Kachiko rose to her feet. She held her hand out to Soun and stated in cold tones, "They're right. Once we've been dismissed, they can finish plotting the rest of our lives for us in ease."  
  
Both Tendou parents reacted not in shock at the tone, but with warning glares directed at their daughter. If Kachiko noticed, she expressed no concern.   
  
Soun rose as well. Both bowed as a matter more of reflex than formality.   
  
As Kachiko began walking toward the back door of the house that led to the yard, she moved with a pronounced limp.   
  
Both the Arisugawas looked in surprise at the girl, then to the Tendous.  
  
The Tendou woman made a placating gesture. "There is no need for alarm. Kachiko was in an accident a while ago. However, the doctors assured us her leg will heal enough that she will be able to walk normally."  
  
"It will never heal enough for things to return to normal," Kachiko said bitterly as she headed to the back porch.  
  
A low growl issued forth from the Tendou father. Again, Kachiko took no notice as she continued limping away.   
  
Soun followed, mostly because he was ordered to, but partially because the girl had awakened that small part of his nature that was connected to curiosity. It was probably the first non-negative emotion that made him react since the horrible events of yesterday.  
  
Upon arriving at the backyard, Soun found himself staring at it in appreciation. Now the little child in him was roused as it joined his curiosity. The yard was beautiful, with far more space than he had seen in some time. It even had a small pond filled with koi. It was very appealing to his senses. He wished it was his, then realized that if the people inside had their way, it soon would be.  
  
Kachiko led the way, despite her bad leg. It was her home, after all. Soun followed, uncertain of what to say. In truth, he would have preferred to remain silent. Though some emotion had been awakened in him, it also served to stir up other emotions and remind him of the loss he had suffered so recently.   
  
Kachiko limped over to the edge of the pond and looked down into it. Soun stood beside her. From the angle the sun's rays struck the surface, it reflected their images rather than revealing what lurked below.   
  
Silence reigned between the two. No gesture was made. No sound uttered. They were like two residents of a statuary, though the it lacked the serenity associated with such a place  
  
Finally, the stillness was broken by Kachiko as she continued staring at the pond. "So, you're damaged goods, too."  
  
"I beg your pardon," Soun asked, startled by the bizarre nature of the comment.  
  
Kachiko finally looked at him as she spoke, the first time she had focused on him since they had been introduced. "You've been busted up inside so bad it's showing. I know. I've seen that face every time I look in the mirror."  
  
For a moment, Soun almost shouted that she didn't know how he felt, that whatever misery she thought she had was nothing compared to the torment he was suffering from every excruciating moment. Then he realized that she wasn't offering sympathy, but stating cold hard fact. And that she was correct.  
  
Now that Soun looked at her, he saw that she too was in pain too, though she projected far more rage simmering beneath the surface than him. He was still too numb to feel that, and anger was never his true forte.   
  
"It was a girl," Kachiko said plainly. There was no judgment in her voice. It was another statement of fact.  
  
Soun was struck with a sudden urge to speak, as though somewhere deep inside he became aware of a burden he had been shouldering without even realizing it.  
  
Soun began talking, not so much courting sympathy as much as releasing something that had been bottled up with the pressure building ever so slowly. "Yes. It was someone who I thought loved me. Someone I intended to spend the rest of my life with. But," his voice choked. "It was over before it began."  
  
"Did your best friend steal her away?" Kachiko laced the accusation with so much venom that the words themselves sounded poisonous.  
  
The unexpected outburst made Soun stare at her in shock. The very idea that Saotome would attempt such a thing, or that Minato would accept it, would have been laughable, had the result not been so tragic. "No. Nothing like that. She just didn't want me. I was a fool thinking she was in love with me."  
  
Soun wasn't certain why he felt like speaking so openly to someone who was a complete stranger until an hour ago. Perhaps it was because he didn't care what she thought. Or perhaps it was the sort of pain that was shared by two people. Like strangers meeting in a bar, and spilling all of their problems to one another in drunken sympathy.  
  
That seemed to mollify Kachiko's anger. "I'm sorry for you. Losing someone you love, for whatever reason, hurts like nothing else anyone can imagine. Except maybe losing your dreams." She stopped speaking.  
  
Soun saw the twisting emotions etched on her face. She was obviously reliving some horrible memory. Seeing her in such a state, he now understood her earlier comment about perceiving him as 'damaged goods'. Her mask had been cast aside, and he saw that what lay beneath was the same thing in his own anguished soul.  
  
Fleetingly, Soun almost asked what Kachiko meant by her statement, wondering if the girl would open up to him the way he had to her. Then he thought better of it. Inexperienced with women or not, even he knew better than to risk her ire by asking such a troubling question. Besides, as self-centered as it sounded, the truth was he was too concerned about himself and his own misery, and lacked the interest to wonder about hers.  
  
Again, no words were exchanged and all was quiet between them again. Soun had never understood how people could refer to silence as deafening until this moment. Now it echoed through his ears, hanging between them and driving him to distraction. Still, he had no idea of what to say.  
  
Once again Kachiko took the initiative. "You don't really want this engagement thing, do you?"  
  
Soun considered lying, then wondered why he should bother. Let the girl know the truth. It made no difference. "Not really. I mean, it's all my parents' idea, not mine. I'm just going along with it. Sorry."   
  
Kachiko shook her head. "I'm not really looking forward to it either. My parents are insisting on it. Until recently, I would have dismissed it out of hand. But now, things have changed." Her eyes took on a distant cast, and her eyes shimmered as they teared up slightly. "Everything has changed."  
  
Again Soun refrained from asking anything about the girl, sensing that trying to pry her open would just end up breaking the lever he employed and resulted in a backlash on him. For all her sorrow and anger, there was a sense of steel about her. He was content to allow her to volunteer the information, like he had his own.  
  
It took a moment for her to regain her composure. Soun was taken aback by the shift in her emotions. Where before she had displayed anger, distance, or distaste, she now possessed what could only be described as a conspiratory gleam in her eyes.   
  
"I have a proposition for you."  
  
Now she was reminding him of Saotome. That was not a good thing. Best friend or not, Genma tended to get Soun into as much trouble as he helped him get out of, if not more. Still, the idea that he was finally being given a choice appealed to him, since fate and his parents had denied him that basic desire for the majority of his life.  
  
"Go on," he finally said.  
  
"Look, neither of us really want to get married, but our families are insisting on it. If we reject each other now, which is what we'd have to do since we aren't the least bit interested in each other, they'd just try to hook us up with someone else. So why don't we fool them by openly accepting the engagement to get them off our backs? We'll insist we have to get to know each other first and act like we're genuinely interested in one another in front of them so they aren't suspicious. We'll drag the pretend engagement out as long as we can until they make us break it off. That should buy us plenty of time and make them leave us alone until we have a chance to decide what we really want to do. What do you say?"  
  
Soun was surprised by the girl's attitude. He had gone into the situation assuming she actually wanted to get married. That she was in a similar predicament as him was reassuring, in a fashion. It was interesting for him to note that until this moment, she had not made an impression upon him, largely because he had been in a state of not caring. However, their talk had opened him up and brought him back to life, the shock of Minato's rejection finally starting to pass, though the pain was still real, stabbing at his heart even when he didn't think about it. But it least it was making him start to cope with his feelings.   
  
Now Soun looked upon his 'fiancee' and his true first impression of her was favorable. It was a fairly devious scheme, and should have a high probability of success since it played into both sets of parents' desires. It would give Soun the time to figure a way to remove himself from his family's schemes without them constantly trying to use him. Even if the plan failed and their deception was discovered, he and Kachiko would be no worse off than if they refused the arrangement outright.   
  
Soun held out his hand. "I accept."  
  
Kachiko shook it. He was surprised by how firm her grip was.  
  
Her hand remained affixed to his, shifting into a more comfortable posture. "Let's stay out here and keep holding hands until they call us back in. Remember to smile a lot and act pleased."  
  
Soun smiled and did as she suggested. The smile was not entirely forced. It felt nice to have someone on his side for a change. Although he had to admit, it was a perverse sort of irony. The cause of his woes was rejection from a girl. Now he was eased from that pain somewhat by the rejection (in a roundabout way) from another.  
  
There was something else that made him take notice of the girl. When he first agreed to her proposal, she smiled slightly. It made her look cute.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"It's a nice day. Why don't we skip the shopping and take a walk in the park?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"It sounds all right to me." Soun said as the couple changed direction to their new destination while continuing to hold hands, smiling at one another.  
  
It was a clear spring day as they headed toward the familiar territory of the park near Kachiko's home. The sun shone through a handful of clouds. A light breeze kept the air from being too hot, and served to tousle Kachiko's hair slightly, as though it was a thing alive that was slowly rousing itself from a slumber.   
  
The effect the beautiful weather had on Kachiko was obvious by her smile. Soun had been around her long enough to recognize the difference between the ones that were genuine and the ones that were forced. Her pleasant mood was infectious, and Soun found himself grinning broadly was well.   
  
Others passed by, some looking at the pair. Soun caught an elderly woman mention what a 'cute couple' they were. Soun was about to take pride in their act when he realized something. Everything he had done today was automatic. All of the hand holding and smiling with Kachiko had happened without a thought of trying to look romantic for others' benefit. It was... peculiar, considering the painstaking steps he used to take at showing the outward appearance of happiness with the girl. Now it was happening as though it was second nature. He wondered exactly what that might portend.   
  
For close to five months now, he and his fiancee (in name, if not in heart) had been carrying on their pretense of a happily engaged couple. In the first few weeks, anxiety was Soun's constant companion, gnawing away at his gut and threatening to give him an ulcer. He was certain everyone would see through their facade and his parents would again try to set him up with a wealthy family that had a nice dowry to bestow upon any boy who was willing to marry their daughter. But the accusations never came. No one saw through their act. Instead, he and Kachiko were left to their own devices, each set of parents openly delighted at how their respective children took to one another without the resistance that had been anticipated.   
  
Without being dogged about his future every minute, Soun had the opportunity to relax and deal with his heartbreak. Not that he had fully dealt with it yet, there was still pain every time he thought about Minato and her rejection, but it didn't seem to hurt quite as much as it did in those early days, and the ache didn't linger like before. He didn't even think about her as often. He supposed he was healing. Perhaps someday the memory of her wouldn't have pain connected to it at all. He could only pray that would be so. At the moment, she no longer haunted him the way she used to, and Soun was grateful for the chance at peace.  
  
Turning his thoughts back to the present, Soun took a moment to look at himself and his companion. Yes, they did appear the happy couple, and on his part, none of his pleasant demeanor was an act. His smile was genuine. He enjoyed spending time with Kachiko. She was a smart girl, though prone to exaggeration, especially when it came to things she did. And though she was smart, almost certainly brighter than him, she wasn't as smart as she liked to think she was. She had gaping blind spots whose existence she was unaware of, and would probably deny if they were pointed out to her.  
  
What had also quickly become evident was that the girl had a temper. It was an impatient thing, appearing with little warning and a terrible thing to behold. Though at the same time she rarely held on to it for very long. How did the saying go? 'Quick to anger, quick to forgive'? It was as though the parable had been created with Kachiko Tendou in mind.   
  
Yes, Kachiko was constantly proving herself an interesting girl. Every time they met, he learned something else about her, though it was like drawing near an iceberg. In the beginning, at a distance, one might think everything above the surface is all there is to see. But once they draw close, they can see into the water and realize there's even more hidden beneath the surface. The more he learned about his 'fiancee' the less he knew, he realized.   
  
There was one thing that vexed him somewhat; Kachiko never talked about her past. Her parents informed him she had graduated from a local school called Furinkan, and that she had been in some sort of car accident toward the end of her senior year, which had damaged her leg. While it would heal enough to walk on it and do simple tasks, she could never put any real stress on it, or the knee would give out, perhaps being damaged worse than before. With the time that had passed, the injury had healed enough so that they would have to walk for over an hour before the strain on it began to make her limp. Now he made excuses to pause during their time together so that she didn't strain it beyond its limits.   
  
Aside from those two things, he knew nothing about her. It was almost as through the girl had never existed before he met her.  
  
Soun cast those thoughts aside. He would rather enjoy himself than dwell on the matter, especially with Kachiko at his side. There was something about being around her that was only rivaled by the time spent with Genma. And even then, the feelings of camaraderie weren't exactly the same as they were with Kachiko. He was uncertain of how to define them, only that she did not fill the same role in his life that Genma did.   
  
They hadn't spoken since entering the park. While Soun was almost unnaturally comfortable in Kachiko's presence, there were times when he liked talking to her and eliciting a smile. Those were hard things to come by. She seemed melancholy much of the time. Thankfully, for Soun's peace of mind, he discovered early on he was not the source of it, though he still hadn't figured out what was. His best guess was that it had something to do with the mysterious past she wouldn't talk about.   
  
Taking the initiative, Soun said, "Kachiko-"  
  
The girl sighed. "How many times do I have to tell you to call me Kachi?"  
  
Again Soun smile. Just last week she had insisted that he call her by that pet nickname. It made him feel happy, almost unnaturally so.  
  
He continued. "Kachi, you'll have to remind me to thank your father. I learned a new martial arts move yesterday. I did it while sparring with Saotome," He puffed his chest out slightly as he bragged about his prowess. "It was truly inspired. Saotome was getting lucky and had the upper hand, but I suddenly realized how I could harness my chi and unleash this demon head-"  
  
"I don't want to hear about that !#$!" Kachiko snapped.   
  
Soun shut his mouth with an audible click. That was unexpected. She hadn't been in a bad mood. She had seemed exceptionally happy. But something had set her off. If it was something he said, he was unsure of what it was.  
  
He tried thinking about what it might be. It wasn't about her father. She spoke of him well enough, at least when it wasn't in reference to Kachiko being a 'proper girl'. And learning a new move hadn't had anything to do with her.   
  
It shouldn't have been Genma. She had met him, and had been amused by his antics. Genma liked her as well. It had been something of a relief that the pair got along. Had they disliked one another, it would have been difficult for Soun to balance his friendship with whatever it was he had with Kachiko. So if mentioning Genma hadn't set her off, what else could it have been?   
  
The only other thing he mentioned in the inconspicuous sentence was his new move. Now that he thought about it, this was the first time the subject of martial arts had come up between them, despite the fact her father was a teacher. During his high school years, Soun had learned the hard way that girls weren't interested in martial arts, to the point that when he brought them up, they would sniff and walk off. He had just continued in the same vein with Kachiko, never talking about them save in a roundabout way. This was the first time he had broached the subject with her. And upon eliciting that sort of response, it would be the last time as well.  
  
All trace of her pleasant mood was gone. A pall of anger, similar to the one surrounding her when they had first met, replaced it. Soun tried lightening the mood. "Your leg is much better now."  
  
She looked at him and her brow furrowed even more than before. Soun was under the impression he had just made the matter worse.   
  
He was considering halting his breathing, just to ensure that didn't set her off, when a male voice behind him inquired. "Kachi? Kachi Tendou? Is that you?"  
  
Kachiko stared past Soun, and her eyes widened. "Bosatsu?"  
  
Soun turned to see a man about his age had walked up the path behind him. Despite a decided lack of interest in men, Soun could tell the newcomer was handsome, in a painfully bishonen manner. It was a look that all too many girls seemed to go for. This 'Bosatsu' had a bright, pleasant smile, and radiated an aura of kindness that spoke of the joy of helping his fellow man without a thought to himself.  
  
Soun took an instinctive dislike to the newcomer.  
  
Kachiko remained staring at him with a sort of open-mouthed gaze of wonder. "Bosatsu, I never thought I'd see you again."  
  
"It has been a while," he said warmly, making Kachiko almost gush at the attention.  
  
Soun's dislike doubled.  
  
Somewhere behind Bosatsu, a feminine voice called out, "Bosa-chan, who is that?"  
  
At his side appeared a girl about the same age as him. Her face was incredibly attractive. She could easily have graced the cover of a magazine.  
  
Kachiko's gushing ended as quickly as it arrived. In a flat voice, she stated. "Oh, if it isn't the bimb-" she stopped abruptly as she stared at the young woman's stomach. "Whoa! You got seriously fat."  
  
"Pregnant," the girl corrected as she patted her mid-section affectionately. Bosatsu did the same, and stared lovingly into the girl's eyes.  
  
"Oh," Kachiko said, her voice lacking any sort of emotion. "So you and Miko are married?"  
  
"Right after graduation," Bosatsu said, blushing slightly.   
  
A large portion of Soun's dislike for the man passed. First impressions were sometimes wrong, after all. This Bosatsu was an all right guy, if a bit on the bishonen side. Real men, like Soun, weren't girly.  
  
Now that Soun had a chance to look at Miko more closely, he saw that despite the large waistline, she was still a very attractive girl. She seemed to have an air of serenity and peace about her that rivaled that of Bosatsu. Soun felt a pang of envy at the closeness the couple shared. They possessed something no sane person could possibly not long for. It made him feel alone.  
  
"I'm sorry you couldn't be there," Miko said sincerely.   
  
"Things happen," Kachiko said quickly. She pointed at the clothing. "Not exactly the designer duds you're used to, eh?"  
  
Soun noticed that Miko's clothing, a baggy sweatsuit, did appear a bit threadbare, as well as having a few purplish stains along the right leg. Obviously it has had seen some use.  
  
Miko fingered the clothing, as though noticing it for the first time. "Well, I'm afraid I don't have access to those sorts of things anymore."  
  
"Oh?" Kachiko asked, some emotion returning to her voice.  
  
Miko nodded, her smile fading slightly. It was bolstered as Bosatsu placed an arm affectionately around her shoulders, drawing her close.   
  
Miko said, "My parents didn't approve of Bosatsu and I marrying. They felt I should marry someone more prominent and rich. I refused. They threatened to cut me out of the family's inheritance. I married Bosatsu. They cut me out and allowed my younger sister to take over my role in the business."  
  
"I'm sorry," Kachiko said sincerely. Soun found himself nodding in agreement. He could appreciate such parental manipulating like few others. Why couldn't parents stay out of their children's affairs and let them live their lives as they would?  
  
Bosatsu held his wife close and rubbed her shoulder.   
  
Miko continued. "I'm not sorry, though. I'm far happier now married to the man I love than I ever was with the money."  
  
Kachiko looked at her incredulously. "You used to go around on a divan with a host of burly guys to tote you around."  
  
Miko gave a dismissive wave of her hand. "A silly teenage phase I went through. I grew up a lot after that." She reached out and grasped Kachiko's hand. "I'm sorry I treated you so poorly then."  
  
Kachiko seemed taken aback by both the gesture and the sincerity behind it. "Yes, well, like you said, it was during the recklessness of our youth. I don't hold it against you."  
  
"I have a job with a bank. We get by. And we have each other," Bosatsu said as he stared lovingly at his wife.   
  
Miko added, "And lots of friends. Bosatsu's one of the nicest people around, and helped out lots of others. It's amazing how often people go out of their way to help us. I'm grateful for every one."  
  
"It sounds like you're really happy," Kachiko said. "I'm glad for you."  
  
Bosatsu seemed to notice Soun for the first time. "I'm sorry. How rude of me. Here I've been talking all this time with Kachi, and I neglected to introduce myself to you. I'm Bosatsu Kanamura, and this is my wife, Miko." The two bowed.  
  
Soun did likewise. "I'm Soun Arisugawa. I'm Kachi's fiancee." He made a point of bringing his arm around her shoulder and bringing her close, like Bosatsu did with his wife.  
  
Kachiko seemed surprised by the familiarity of the gesture, though she didn't resist. It took but a second to find herself comfortably cradled in his arm.  
  
Miko stared at Kachiko in shock. It passed quickly. "Congratulations! And here you always used to brag about how you'd never marry young."  
  
"Yes, well, sometimes things change and you play the cards you're dealt. It's either that or fold, and that never sat well with me," Kachiko said.   
  
Soun thought he detected a note of strain in the statement, but did not comment upon it. Now was not the time.   
  
Neither Miko nor Bosatsu knew what to make of the response.   
  
Kachiko said, "Soun's a wonderful guy. He's made me happier than I thought possible."  
  
"I feel the same way," Soun added. He wasn't certain how much of his answer was said to look good, and how much was genuine. Mostly the latter, he thought. He wondered how much of Kachiko's was genuine as well. He found himself eager to know, even if there was no way of discovering the truth. Today was holding many revelations for him, as well as more important questions that begged to be answered.  
  
After the introductions were over, the couples exchanged small pleasantries, as frequently happened between people that were casual acquaintances in their past. Nothing of importance was said, and the couples made token phrases about getting together sometime, though neither took any steps towards making it a reality, such as exchanging phone numbers or addresses.   
  
Once they were finished, the couples continued on their way in the opposite directions.   
  
Kachiko remained unusually silent, leaving Soun to consider the unexpected encounter. He was uncomfortable with the fact that two people Kachiko hadn't met in years knew more about her past than her own fiancé did. There was something wrong with it on some unspoken basic, level. They had been together long enough that she should have said something by now. She knew all about his past, save the Minato situation. Had she asked, he might have even told her, though she never did.   
  
Soun decided he needed to know more. What if they met another couple Kachiko knew, and Soun ended up humiliated by having to admit his lack of knowledge about his fiancee's past?  
  
"Were you close to either of them?" Soun asked.   
  
"I don't want to talk about it," Kachiko said in a tone that considered the matter closed.  
  
An errant thought occurred to Soun, something Kachiko said the first day he had met her. "You didn't seem to like that Miko girl. Was she the best friend that stole your lover away?"  
  
"I said I don't want to talk about it!"  
  
Under different circumstances, Soun probably would have taken his usual spineless route and remained silent. But in a surprising show of determination, he insisted, "Why is it you refuse to talk about your past with me?"  
  
There was a bleak look on Kachiko's face. "Because the past is over. There's only the present and future to consider." She turned away, refusing to face him as she spat out. "I want to go home now."  
  
Tired of the games, and figuring he wasn't asking too much, he responded with, "Fine. Walk yourself back!" And immediately headed toward the train station that would return him to his home.  
  
"Fine, I will!" Kachiko shouted, then hurried as quickly as she could toward her home in the opposite direction.  
  
It was only after she was out of sight that Soun slowed down, still too angry to truly feel regret over his actions. He was in the right. He knew it. She just had to accept that he should be allowed to know more about her.  
  
It was as he took a more leisurely pace that he realized something. If they really were a couple, than that meant they had just experienced their first real fight.   
  
He just hoped it wasn't their last.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The shrill ring of the phone echoed throughout the Arisugawa household, making Soun groan. Sleep had only seduced him recently, thoughts and concerns of the fight troubling him so much that he had almost called Kachiko to apologize. He probably would have, save that when he had sought Genma's opinion on the matter, his friend assured him he was doing the right thing. It was a man's duty to call the shots and tell women how things were going to be. If that meant being firm when it came time to remind them who the master of the relationship was, then that was a price that had to be paid. At least that was what Genma said.   
  
Of course, Genma didn't really have any steady girlfriends either.   
  
"Oh, I should have apologized," Soun moaned aloud through his drowsiness.   
  
Through his door, he heard his mother stomp through the home until the phone stopped in the middle of a ring. Loudly, the woman reprimanded, "Do you know what time it is?!" There was a pause, then in a congenial voice, "Oh, Daughter-in-Law, it's you... No, it's not too late for you to call... Of course, I'll get Soun up."  
  
As footsteps drew close, Soun looked at the clock on his nightstand. 1:30? It was late. Or early, depending on how one looked at it.  
  
The door to Soun's room was thrust open without the courtesy of a knock. His mother stood in the doorway, gazing upon him like an avenging angel come to mete out divine justice. "You'd better not have done anything to make her angry. If you blow this arrangement, nothing you've gone through will compare to what I'll do to you."  
  
Not wanting to put up with a lecture about responsibility at this hour, Soun pointed out, "She is on the other end of that phone out there, the one that's off the hook," he emphasized.  
  
That made Michiru realize her error. She immediately shut up.  
  
With no further impediment, Soun walked to the phone and picked it up. He had wanted to apologize. Now was a golden opportunity, even if it was at an ungodly hour.  
  
"Kachi," Soun said into the receiver.   
  
"Soun." The voice sounded relieved. "There's something I need to talk to you about."  
  
"First, let me apologize."  
  
"Not now. Meet me downstairs."  
  
That confused him. For a moment it sounded like she was talking about meeting him now. Sleep deprivation was giving him auditory hallucinations. "Downstairs?" he said on the offhand chance he had heard correctly.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"It'll take you an hour to get here."  
  
"I'm already outside your apartment. I'm calling from at the corner pay phone. Just come downstairs."  
  
"I'll be right down." Soun hung up the phone and returned to his room to throw on one of his brown gis. It was something that could be donned quickly, and on the chance some of the less civilized elements in the neighborhood were prowling about, would identify him as a person not to be trifled with. One of the advantages to being a martial arts prodigy was that after a few of the local thugs twice your size went down from a couple of casual of blows, no one went out of their way to trouble you. In fact, people tended to be outright polite.  
  
Michiru watched her son get dressed. "Why on earth did she call you at this hour? Did you knock her up? You'll have to take responsibility and get married immediately."  
  
"It's nothing like that!" Soun snapped, disgusted with how eager the woman was to believe the worst. He didn't bother lowering his voice. He wasn't worried about waking his father. Kentaro Arisugawa could sleep through a war and not even roll over from the disturbance.  
  
"Treat her nicely," Michiru called out as Soun raced out of his apartment and downstairs.  
  
Kachiko was exactly where she said, waiting anxiously for him. He was relieved to see she was fine.   
  
"What's wrong?" he gasped out.  
  
Kachiko didn't answer right away, instead opting to bite her lower lip. Soun was beginning to recognize it as a sign that she was about to do something that troubled her.  
  
He remained silent, giving her the opportunity to start when she was comfortable. It took almost a full minute before she said, "During my senior year I met this guy, Hayato. He wasn't handsome, you're way better looking than him. He was actually kind of unattractive. Even had that unibrow thing going. He wasn't in good shape. Well, he was a bit paunchy. He wasn't really funny, though occasionally he had a good joke or two. There wasn't anything remarkable about him. He was normal. But despite that, we hit it off real well. I mean, way better than I had any other guy I dated. And he liked me too. It was one of those inconspicuous things, that started out as friends, but became something else. Before I knew it, things had taken a life of their own, and we began dating. It wasn't long after that that I woke up one day and I realized I was in love with him, and he felt the same way about me."  
  
"You don't have to do this," Soun said before she could continue.  
  
"Yes, I do," she assured him, then continued quickly, as though she was afraid she'd lose her nerve. "Anyway, things were going great for the first five months. They went so well, we started planning a life together after we graduated school. It was that serious. But it was shortly after that things changed, although I didn't realize it at the time. He started to seem a little distant, but with entrance exams coming up, I just figured that was distracting him. So I put it in the back of my mind and ignored it, thinking everything was normal.  
  
"And than I had my," her voice caught for a second. "I had my accident. It was bad. Real bad. My knee was permanently messed up. All my plans for what I was going to do for a career after graduating were over. Just like that. In a split second, it was all over for me and my entire life changed. You can't know what it's like, having fate take away the only thing you've wanted your entire life. No one can, unless it happens to them, and I wouldn't wish that on my worst foe.   
  
"Anyway, I was a real mess. About the only thing that kept me together was Hayato. As long as I had him at my side, I'd make it through, somehow. No matter how bad it was, I had him to help me through it. With him, everything would be all right. It had to be, because he'd be there, and love conquers all, right?  
  
"Only it wasn't love, at least not on his part. Not the lasting kind. Right after the accident, when I was still in bed with my screwed up leg, he tells me he's in love with someone else. That was why he was so distant lately. He had tried to fight it, but he couldn't. It just happened naturally, like it had with me. When he realized it was hopeless, he gave in. He was going to tell me about it right before the accident occurred, but obviously it was too late. After it happened, he knew he had to do it right then, since if he didn't I would latch onto him worse than ever, like taking up the slack for what I couldn't do, and insist we get married right away. He said he had to end it before things got to that point. The idiot. Any other time, I might have been able to handle it, but not then. Not like that.  
  
"And then came the absolute crowning moment. It turned out he was in love with my best friend, Sakura, and she was in love with him just as much. I never saw it coming. We were lifelong best friends. We were like sisters, if not closer. We were inseparable since we met in kindergarten. I mean, we did everything together. Shared all our hopes and dreams. All our laughs and tears. We always counted on each other for anything we needed, and nothing could keep us apart. There was nothing I wouldn't have trusted her with, and she was the same way. I even saved her life a couple of times. Whenever either of us needed something, the other would be there. It was the kind of friendship that would last a lifetime.  
  
"Or so I thought. And then she did that to me. At the absolute lowest point in my life, she stabbed me in the back at the worst possible moment. Oh, she tried making excuses, like Hayato. She said she had tried to fight it when she realized what was happening. She even tried to stay away from us, but was so miserable she kept coming back. And then things happened, and she 'knew' she couldn't ignore her feelings, or him. So she gave in to her feelings, and he gave in to his. Just like that.   
  
"She got all teary eyed and tried apologizing, but it was worthless. I hated her. No, I still hate her. I hate her more than every person I ever hated rolled into one. I'll never forgive her, not so long as there's breath in my body. When she's dead, I'll piss on her grave and dance on it afterwards. I can't even say that name anymore without wanting to scream and cry and break things. If I was to see her again, I don't know what I'd do, but it wouldn't be pretty.  
  
"Other friends tried to cheer me up, but in my anger, I lashed out at them over and over again until I drove them all away, truly making myself alone. Like I said, I was messed up. I didn't even attend graduation. I couldn't stand to see any of them. All the people I knew were reduced to nothing more than painful reminders of all I had lost and would never get back.   
  
"I had lost my dreams, my lover, and my friend all at once. Forever. I had nothing left. I just wanted to die. I was as close to losing my mind and killing myself as a person can get without actually doing it. I almost did it a hundred times, but never made it past picking up the blade. Something inside of me refused to let go, no matter how much I wanted to. I guess I was always a glutton for punishment. So I stuck it out, even though I was completely broken. It was like I was moving on automatic. I don't even remember many of those days. I was in a daze. One day blended into another. They were all the same. Nothing happened in them.  
  
That's why I didn't resist my parents' urging to get married. I didn't have a future of my own. So, broken as I was, I surrendered to their wishes and started to become the prim and proper girl they always wanted. It's not that it was bad, it just wasn't something I was interested in. It wasn't me. Not really. But I couldn't be what I wanted anymore, and I had to do something. So I did this." She held her arms out helplessly at her side.  
  
Words unbidden came to Soun lips. "It's enough for me."  
  
Kachiko smiled, tears glistening in her eyes. She sniffled and wiped them away. "Anyhow, shortly after I met you, things started to change. Inside me, I mean. After a while, waking up didn't seem like an exercise in pain. I wouldn't say I was happy. It was more like I was less miserable than I used to be. I guess I was healing, though it was a slow process. After a couple of months, I guess things became sort of normal, or at least what passes for normal in my life. I mean, I still get resentful over all that was taken from me, but I can look forward to things as well. And it gets better every day." She looked meaningfully at Soun.   
  
Soun nodded. It wasn't quite that bad for him. While his heart had been really and truly broken, he still had his dreams, and Saotome, to help console him. "I feel the same way. I used to not want to get out of bed either. But now, I have something to look forward to when I wake up as well."  
  
"As well you should," Kachiko said in deadly earnest. The facade broke down quickly, and she laughed. There was a bit of sorrow in it, but it was the sort that was being released, rather than being bottled up and allowed to fester like an infected wound. "Anyway, that's why I don't like to talk about my past. There's nothing good in it. Not anymore. One thing I've always been good at was blowing off stuff that happens to me and moving on beyond them. That's what I had to do, and that's what I've done. I've left everything behind in order to go forward. Those that cannot let go of the past will be consumed by it, and I won't let that happen to me." Determination was set her features now. Despite the pain that was still present, it was obvious she was looking past than and toward hope for the future.  
  
The heart rending confession made Soun feel like crying himself, but his pride would not let him. He did not want to appear weak in front of a woman who was obviously so much stronger than him, at least in the ways that mattered. "Thank you for sharing that with me. It means a lot."  
  
"Yeah, well, I had to let go of it and tell someone," Kachiko said. "And you're the only person I can really talk to about it. You're the only person in my life that I really trust."  
  
Soun wiped his eyes so she wouldn't suspect the tears that were there, but he was certain she knew. Even in the poor light of the street lamp, she knew.  
  
So, their first fight was over. Their relationship had turned out stronger because of the fires it had been thrust into. That was better news than he had dared dream of. It raised his spirits so much, that when a risky idea entered his mind, he decided to give voice to it rather than ignore it.  
  
Soun cleared his throat, then said in a firm, commanding tone, "I want to go out with you tomorrow. And not just because we're supposed to be engaged. I want it to be an official date because we want to be with each other, and not part of some scheme to fool others."  
  
Kachiko's eyes widened in surprise. She turned away, interlocking her hands behind her head. She stared up at the stars above, as though seriously considering the proposition.   
  
When she turned back toward him, she wore a smirk. It was one Soun was rapidly growing accustomed to. "I accept. Of course, that means you pay for everything and have to go to extraordinary lengths to impress me if you want me to try for a second. This is our first official date, after all, and I don't impress easy."  
  
Even as relief flooded him, Soun decided two could play her game. "No hold on a second. I'll have to wait until after the date before I can decide if I it was good enough to want a second."  
  
That clearly caught Kachiko off-guard, badly enough that it took several long moments for her to regain her composure. Then she said in a voice that was half-playful, half-serious. "Oh ho, someone thinks pretty highly of themselves. We'll see if you're good enough to reach first base tomorrow. Until then." She blew him a kiss, then turned around and headed back toward her home.   
  
Soun was left staring at her behind. It was then he really stared at it for the first time. It was on the small side, like her chest, but he'd wager it was firm. He was fairly certain he wouldn't be able to confirm that for a while, Kachiko was consistent as well as rigid about what boundaries could be crossed, but he was willing to take the chance it would be worth the wait.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Soun squeezed again, masking it under the guise of a caress. While being slightly soft on the surface, allowing one to gain a good handhold, there was a definite solidity hidden beneath that top layer. Firm in the flesh as well as appearance. It was everything one could hope for, or even dream about.   
  
"What is this obsession with fondling my bottom? That's got to be the fifth time you've done it."  
  
"Sorry," Soun apologized to his fiancee. Or, more precisely, to her derriere, since that was what he was sitting next to on the bed. Three months since that night when he and Kachiko went on their first official 'date', their romance had culminated in the love motel room that they relaxed in now. Tacky to the extreme in a hot pink and tasseled decor, it was cheap. And more importantly, close by. Close was the most important thing, since their heavy petting session had finally persuaded Kachiko to let Soun finally 'run home for the score.'  
  
The initial two times they had made love were as it tended to be with first time lovers after the end of a long courtship. Both were so nervous they had merely concentrated on basking in the reality what they had fantasized about for months, and made sure all the parts went in their proper places. After getting it right the first time, they had relaxed more by the second time, though they still concentrated on making a good impression and assuring their partner that the enjoyment elicited from the first joining wasn't a fluke. Once that was mutually confirmed, they moved on to the third. That was all about pleasure and enjoying themselves, as well as one another.   
  
With the ending of the third conjoining, they relaxed after their most successful bout of lovemaking yet, each satisfied they had done a good enough job that there would be a next time, and were able to relax in the much appreciated afterglow.   
  
"I didn't have you figured for an ass man," Kachiko said in reference to the hand still resting on her backside.  
  
Despite dating for months, and getting to know each other better, Soun still found himself a bit taken aback by her raunchy statements, stated without a hint of shame. Still, it was nothing compared to her miserable sense of humor. As much as he loved her, he still couldn't pretend to like it. On the upside, according to Kachiko, no one in her entire life had ever appreciated it, which meant Soun was on even ground.   
  
Once past the initial surprise, Soun joked back, "With an ass like yours, it's easy."  
  
Kachiko glowed at the statement. "Yours ain't so bad either." She shifted enough to pinch one of his own cheeks, doing it a touch on the hard side to emphasis the statement.   
  
Rather than lie back down and enjoy the comfort of her body, Soun rose to his feet and stretched, working a kink out of his back. After their first time, when they were more or less feeling each other out, Kachiko had taken the initiative in the lovemaking. She was definitely energetic in bed, which didn't surprise him in the slightest. He had her pegged as a wildcat once she decided to go all the way. Now he had the scratch marks to prove it.   
  
Kachiko was content to lay where she was, openly admiring his form. Soun resisted the urge to preen. He remembered doing that early on with Minato. All it had elicited was a laugh. Nothing could end a night's activities for a man quicker than a laugh at the wrong time.   
  
"You sure knew what you were doing," Kachiko said as she relaxed, posing just a touch on the seductive side.  
  
Soun barely kept from commenting that he had a good teacher. Women never wanted to hear about past lovers. He also wanted to avoid thinking about Minato now. While it would not spoil the mood (nothing could after that last session with Kachiko on top, nearly popping a couple of discs out with how hard she had ridden him) it would not help it either, and he wanted to enjoy things for as long as he could. Instead, Soun opted to shift the direction of the conversation. "That wasn't your first time either."  
  
Kachiko blushed slightly, seeming to regard it as an accusation rather than a compliment. "I'll have you know there's only been one other guy I've been with. Although it was more than once, and he definitely knew what he was doing."  
  
Soun found his mood darkening at that, wishing he had kept his mouth shut. He didn't want to hear about her past experiences either. What was it Saotome had once said in an unusually philosophical moment? Ah, yes. A man always wants to be a woman's first conquest, while a woman always wants to be a man's final conquest. Soun knew the wish wasn't realistic, but he didn't need the truth rubbed in his face either.  
  
Kachiko stared at Soun pensively.   
  
"What?" Soun asked, seeing something in her eyes that aroused his curiosity.  
  
"You'd look good with a mustache. Not that you're not handsome now," she added. "It's just I think it would make you look sexy. Irresistibly sexy."  
  
Soun rubbed his upper lip. He had considered growing one for a while now. Confirmation that it would only make him better-looking meant he'd stop shaving as of tomorrow.  
  
The smile Kachiko wore was like a cat that had cornered its prey. It was almost as though she could read Soun's mind, he observed.   
  
She continued talking. "You know, Arisugawa, you're damn lucky."  
  
"Oh?"  
  
"Yep," Kachiko played with an errant strand of hair. "If you had gone about things in any other way, I'd have probably thrown you out on your ass after that first meeting."  
  
"It's nice to know I'm a smooth operator," Soun kidded, especially since in his wildest fantasies he held no illusions of such. His imagination had limits.  
  
"I'm serious," Kachiko insisted. "On that first day we met, it was only because we were so much alike right at that moment, two people nearly broken by what life threw at them, that I was willing to accept you hanging around. It was the only reason I trusted you, since I knew you weren't interested in me anymore than I was in you. It was only after a few months passed, and I healed up some inside, that I could accept you as a friend. And the more we hung around together, the more I realized you were actually a good guy that I might like as more than a friend. And then after we started dating, I knew you were a guy I could fall in love with, which I did, which is why we were doing the horizontal mambo tonight." She sighed. "Like I said, real lucky."  
  
The sincerity of her speech made a lump form in Soun's throat. He only wished he was as eloquent and could say something equally as meaningful to her. Instead he let his body do the talking as he returned to sitting on the bed next to her still prone body. He ran his finger tips along her side, making her shiver at the contact. He continued doing it, allowing her to enjoy the toying with her flesh.  
  
"Want another round?" she offered.  
  
Soun thought he detected a slight hesitation in her voice. Sensing the offer was more of his benefit than hers, he declined. "It's getting late. I wouldn't want our parents to think we were up to no good."  
  
She laughed and punched him lightly in the side. "I'm sure the old man would blow up at the idea of 'his little girl' rolling around with some guy and banging her brains out."  
  
Sometimes Soun wondered how she could ever maintain the illusion of propriety with a mouth like hers. When he had first met her, in her placid kimono in the formal setting of her home, he automatically had her pegged as a proper Japanese girl, much like her mother was. It was only after several months of getting to know one another that Soun came to understand just how inaccurate that image was, in attitude as well as her verbal acumen.   
  
Soun also realized her observation was probably correct. He would have to be discreet around the elder Tendou from now on. There was no sense in getting into an argument with the man over the matter, even if he and Kachiko were technically engaged. Despite his advanced age, the old man had a few tricky moves in his arsenal of techniques. One of the tenets of the Tendou school seemed to be misdirection bordering on the edge of outright dishonor. Soun and the old man had some vigorous training sessions, which Kachiko seemed to avoid for some reason. Probably because of a distinct lack of interest in the martial arts. She even went so far as to forbid him from talking about them in her presence. Soun did as she wished. He could still talk with Saotome over them, after all. The man was more obsessed about martial arts than Soun was. He really needed to get a woman.  
  
Soun rose to his feet once again, this time with the intention of heading to the shower to clean off. He was tempted to ask Kachiko to join, but decided they would probably end up doing something that would defeat the purpose of trying to clean up. Besides, tiles were slippery, and most accidents did happen in the bath. Best to keep their gymnastics confined to the bed, or at least other soft surfaces. After tonight, it was clear there would be plenty of repeat performances.  
  
As Soun once again stretched out to work on his back (he was going to have to get used to Kachiko's energetic nature) she suddenly said, "Let me warn you now, I'm only going to have one kid. No way am I staying fat and bloated being some kind of baby machine. And I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, so don't think we'll keep trying until we come up with a boy, then we stop. You want a boy, you'd better tell your balls to make only Y-chromosomes."  
  
Soun froze. He hadn't seen that one coming. She hadn't even tried segueing into it. He imagined he did have something akin to a 'deer caught in headlights' look in his eyes as he stammered out, "Y... you mean you want to get married?"  
  
Kachiko's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Are you saying you don't want to get married to me?"  
  
Their relationship had finally reached a point where Soun recognized some of his fiancee's behavioral patterns. When she heard a question she didn't like, she tended to rephrase it in such a way that giving the answer she did not want to hear would be very, very bad. He supposed he should have been grateful for the obvious nature of the delivery. Despite his lack of experience, he knew women could twist innocent statements around to make it sound like a man was insulting or rejecting them. Kachiko's way of doing it was almost more along the lines of an open challenge rather than a veiled implication.  
  
Soun considered what she was saying (and she was saying, rather than asking, regardless of phrasing it like a question). He hadn't really given the matter much thought, thinking there was a ways to go before that came up. Kachiko was the one who defined where their relationship stood, and Soun followed without complaint. That was all right with him, as far as he was concerned. He made a much better follower than a leader, and Kachiko was remarkably straight forward in stating where she felt their relationship was and exactly how far she was willing to go. Now she was stating it again, asking him if he was ready for the next step. Did he want to make the arranged marriage into a real one?  
  
The quickness of the answer, and the total certainty of it, surprised him. Before his mind cast doubts into his decision, he said, "Yes. More than anything in the world."  
  
"Good," Kachiko said plainly and curled up with her pillow, watching Soun contently.  
  
On Soun's part, he was a bit stunned by the ease with which it had been decided. He would have imagined the whole situation regarding a formal proposal would have to be carefully set up, with lots of dinner and flowers, and choosing an expensive ring he would spend the rest of his life paying off, and carrying an ulcer in his stomach as he repeatedly let ideal opportunities to propose slip through his fingers due to his spinelessness. In some ways, he was relieved that Kachiko had taken the initiative and essentially proposed to him, allowing things to be decided so easily.   
  
They'd have to discuss matters and make formal arrangements later. Both sets of parents would be thrilled with he and Kachiko's mutual acceptance of the situation. The length of the courtship had gone on for so long that Soun's parents had taken to constantly prodding him about when he and Kachiko would go forward with the marriage ceremony. Soun had remained adamant in his decision to wait and not be browbeaten into trying to move things along farther or faster than either he or Kachiko wanted.   
  
His fiancee had that effect on him, increasing his resolve and bolstering his confidence in anything he dared to try. At his side, she made him a better, stronger person that he could ever be on his own. And he thought he had a similar effect on her. She smiled more often now, and the dark expressions that frequently clouded her in the early days had long since passed. Now they reveled in each other's company. There were still spats and fights, no relationship lacked them, but they were always quickly resolved, and the couple returned to normal afterwards. It was a level of happiness Soun had feared he would never experience again after that awful day at Minato's.   
  
It was just as Kachiko always said. It was best to leave some things behind so that one could move forward and into the future. And that was what marriage with her represented: the future. And a bright one at that.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
As Soun headed back to the table where Kachiko was waiting for him, yet another smile made its presence known. The wedding had been everything that could have been hoped for. There was a nice, formal ceremony in the traditional manner, which pleased the elder Tendous (Kachiko had wanted to elope just to irritate her parents, but Soun had convinced her otherwise, nearly throwing out his voice with how long and loudly he had to talk). All the people invited had shown up. Friends (of which there was a surprising number) and relatives (of which there were a surprising few) had gotten along well, with no incidents, death threats, or people passing out in the wedding cake. Even Saotome had behaved himself, though Soun figured he was on his best behavior to impress his date, that Nodoka woman he had been trying to woo for some time.   
  
Deep inside, Soun held the unspoken fear that something would go wrong and the wedding would be ruined. It was the way his luck usually ran. A thousand different scenarios ran through his mind. The hall they rented would collapse. The guests would be stricken with food poisoning. The priest would fall over dead in the middle of the ceremony. The hand of God would strike Soun dead at the altar. Kachiko would refuse, claiming it was all a joke and she couldn't believe he had fallen for it. Yet none of those had happened. Everything went exactly as planned. It was as though he and Kachiko had been destined to be wed (not that he would ever say such aloud to her, given her cynical view of Destiny). And now they were. Husband and wife, till death did they part.  
  
With the success of the wedding behind them, that left the reception in full swing. It had reached the stage where the noise level increased proportionally to the level of alcohol being consumed. Soon, he and his new bride would have to excuse themselves, as much to avoid a potential incident as for the desire for privacy. Others could deal with the aftermath that would be left behind in their departure. Soun had more important matters on mind.  
  
He was just coming back from having to relive himself (not surprising, given the copious amounts of alcohol Saotome had been toasting to him) when he spotted his parents standing near the entrance to the reception hall. They were out of earshot, but Soun could tell by the animated gesturing of his father that something had him highly agitated. Kentaro only reserved hand gestures for the most trying of times.   
  
Soun moved toward them, wondering what was wrong and hoping he could defuse the situation, lest it risk ruining what had otherwise been the happiest day of his life. As he drew near, what he saw froze him to the spot. Only his mouth worked as he whispered, "Minato."  
  
Having come close enough to identify her meant he too had come within the woman's line of sight. She gave an overjoyed, "Soun!" momentarily drawing the attention of those within earshot, and proceeded to move toward him. Given her endowments, this was accompanied by a fair amount of jiggle as well.  
  
With people now staring their way, Kentaro and Michiru could not dare to continue preventing the woman from entering for fear of causing the very incident they had tried to hide. They stood aside, remaining near the entryway and glaring at Minato's back.  
  
Minato bowed. Soun responded automatically by doing the same. He noted Minato was wearing a business suit style outfit, unlike anything she had owned before. While it was formal, on her impressive frame it made her look sexier than he could ever remember. The way several male bystanders stared at her seemed to agree with Soun's assessment, despite what had happened between them, and all he had experienced since, he felt a pang of jealousy at the men.  
  
"I'm surprised to see you here," Soun said. And he was. Over the months, he rarely thought of her, and when he did, the memories were no longer the bitter, pain-filled ones they started out as. Instead, they tended to be happy, remembering all of the kinder, gentler moments they had shared. It was surprising. Given how devastated he was at the time, he was certain he would never forget the pain. Now it was a secondary thing, barely with the effort to remember.  
  
Minato's smile softened from a joyous one to a more sentimental thing. "I could hardly ignore one of my former favorite guys without giving him a present for his wedding."  
  
"How did you know I was getting married?"  
  
"I've been stalking you for the last year."  
  
Soun's eyes goggled.   
  
Minato ruffled his hair and laughed. "You always were gullible. Actually I came across a notice in the paper about you getting married, and decided to drop by. I'm not intruding, am I?"  
  
"No, of course not. It's wonderful to see you." And it was. Soun was amazed. Before this moment, in his mind, he was certain that he would feel the heartbreak anew, or at least bitter memories if he happened to accidentally cross paths with Minato. But now, with her standing before, him, he felt privileged and honored that someone who had meant so much to him before was willing to wish him well, especially after how terribly things had gone. It was only then he realized that he was truly over her, that the relationship with Kachiko was no rebound effect. He loved his wife for who she was, and for no other reason.   
  
Minato leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "Anyway, I can't stay long. So I'll wish the two of you well in your future happiness, and give you a gift." She pulled an envelope from her outfit and handed it to him.  
  
Soun looked at it. "Should I open it now?"  
  
"I'd prefer you did. I want to see the look on your face."  
  
Her bemused grin put Soun's guard up. He recognized the look as one that said Minato was doing this because she would be the one amused, and anything Soun got out of it would be coincidental. Kachiko had an identical look, one of the few physical traits the women shared. He wondered if all women had such a smile.   
  
Bracing himself, Soun opened the envelope. His eyes goggled at what was within.   
  
"I thought you might like it," Minato said in a throaty purr, obviously satisfied at the reaction.  
  
"This much money?"   
  
"It'll help you start a family."  
  
"It's too much." Soun tried handing the envelope back.   
  
Minato placed her hands on her hips and glared. "It's a gift."  
  
"But you can't afford this," Soun insisted.  
  
Minato crossed her arms under her bosom. "If you must know, it's from a job someone paid me to do. It was a legal one, so don't go thinking I did something outrageously kinky to get it. However, I didn't feel good about it. Legal or not, it was one of the worst things I ever did in my life to earn it. I felt terrible about it, and almost didn't do it. But I did. After some time passed, I realized that, as distasteful as it was, it was the right thing to do. Had I been thinking clearly, I would have done it for free. So I felt guilty about being given this large sum of money I had without really having earned it. Returning it wasn't an option, since I didn't like the people that hired me. So I was left pondering what to do.  
  
"Then I saw you in the paper. Once I saw the announcement, it hit me. I thought maybe you could use it for something good, and my conscience will be clear. So if you accept it, you'll be doing me a favor as well."  
  
The time spent with Minato told him of the heartfelt sincerity behind the words, and that despite the blatantly generic delivery hiding the exact details of the information, she was telling the truth. There was no denying the money would serve he and Kachiko well, especially since their 'rehearsals as a married couple', before they had the actual ceremony, had paid dividends. Luckily, Kachiko wasn't showing yet, or else there might have been a scandal.   
  
Soun bowed more deeply than before. "Thank you."  
  
"Oh, no need to be so formal." Minato reached forward and embraced Soun.   
  
He felt the familiar sensation of her impressive bust flattening against his chest, which prodded him to remember part of their past life together. He felt guilty over it, but couldn't help himself. He hugged much more lightly back.  
  
They broke off the embrace. Minato took a step back and looked Soun over with a critical eye. "That wife of yours is one lucky woman."  
  
"Anyone marrying you will be a lucky man," Soun replied.  
  
"Damn straight." Minato gave him a wink, then made a great production of looking at her watch. "I really have to go now. I just dropped by to give you that." She blew him a kiss, then turned on her heel and sauntered toward the exit, past a host of disappointed men and the glaring Arisugawas. She shot Soun's parents a knowing look, and shouted over her shoulder to him, "I hope you enjoy the money."  
  
Soun noted both his parents turned red at the statement. In that moment, many things suddenly made sense as various questions that had plagued him suddenly became answered. Had it been any other day, things would have turned ugly. As it was, he would find a way to make them pay for their self-important meddling. But it would have to happen later. At the moment, Soun was happy, and intended to remain that way.   
  
As Minato sauntered out, a more demure figure sidled up next to Soun and looped its arm through his own.  
  
"So, who was that?" Kachiko asked as her grip tightened possessively upon his arm.   
  
While her voice sounded pleasant on the surface, Soun could hear the mix of suspicion and ice that lay underneath. While his new wife was largely an enigma to him, her possessiveness he understood all too well.   
  
"An old friend," Soun said simply. "She came to wish me luck."  
  
Tartly, Kachiko said, "She was certainly-"  
  
Soun cut her off, "Whatever you're about to say, don't."  
  
The remark surprised Kachiko, particularly the almost alien, warning tone in it. However, one look into Soun's eyes made her sharp response die on her lips. Icily, she said, "So, is she going to be coming by again?"  
  
Soun shook his head. "No. She just came by to wish us luck. And to give us this." Soun showed her the envelope.   
  
Kachiko's eyes goggled at the sight as she snatched the money out of his hands. After flipping through the ream of bills, they disappeared into a fold of her kimono. Soun decided it was just as well. His wife had made it very clear she would be controlling the finances of the house. She had a certain appreciation for money, one that bordered on greed without actually going over it.  
  
Kachiko said, "That was a very generous donation on her part. It'll help pay for the remodeling we're going to have to do to one of the rooms soon." She patted her stomach meaningfully.  
  
Soun allowed himself to do the same. Marveling at the idea that his child was in there. It was a pity they would only have one. Already he could tell he would be a good father. But Kachiko had remained adamant about the one child limit. Soun would just have to lavish all of his paternal attention on one offspring instead of several.  
  
"Let's get back to the others," Soun said, leading Kachiko back to the reception.   
  
She made him lean down and whispered in his ear, "But not for much longer. I'm not so far along I don't still need servicing, Husband."  
  
Soun actually blushed. They had been mixing company with others long enough. He would make certain to bid Saotome farewell, then they could head out to the hot springs vacation his new in-laws had purchased for the pair as a wedding gift. They hadn't really needed to, but they wanted the couple to be happy.   
  
Surrounded by friends, family, and his new wife, and with a dangling loose end tied up at last, Soun knew life couldn't get better than that. He only wished it could last forever.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Twenty years later, Soun put out his cigarette and turned his eyes away from the stars, though he was looking to a place much farther away than the celestial bodies so many millions of miles away. Looking back on everything, it was really quite remarkable that the two of them had gotten together at all. They had been two strangers at the lowest point in their lives, pushed together unwillingly by others. Yet somehow, over the course of a year, they had gone from partners in crime, to friends, to lovers, to husband and wife, and then parents. That was why he still had faith that he could be reunited with his impossibly returned wife. They had beaten the long odds together once, and they could do it again.  
  
Since Kachiko's return, there was something bothering him. Thinking of the past had sharpened his thoughts and returned some of his wits to him. While he and Kachiko had fallen truly and deeply in love, it was under a specific set of circumstances. Even she had admitted events had followed the only course they could have for things to work out so perfectly in the end. It was by chance that they ended up married together, for which he would be eternally grateful.   
  
However, despite the fact they were essentially the same people on the inside, the circumstances were completely different. Kachiko was younger and more vibrant than ever, while he was no longer a young man in the spring of his youth. He was a father of three, approaching middle age. As much as he loathed it, perhaps circumstances in the past had played a much larger role in their relationship that he wanted to admit.   
  
"Father, it's getting late."  
  
Kasumi's voice distracted Soun, changing his line of thought instantly. His subconscious took the opportunity provided by that perfect excuse to return the unwanted ideas into the back of his mind.   
  
Soun looked down at his watch, catching sight of the pile of stubs that had accumulated next to him. He had lost track of the time. He rose to his feet, brushing a handful of ashes that had fallen on his formal attire.  
  
Kasumi said, "Mother returned a while ago, so you don't need to worry about her any longer."  
  
The concern made Soun smile, misguided though it was. Kachiko was able to take care of herself at any age. What he needed now was to think about the matter in order to determine what he should do next. While his heart told him one thing, his mind seemed to pull in another direction. He wanted to follow his heart, like he had when he was younger, but experience countered youth, and he knew that sometimes the heart was wrong and the mind was correct, regardless of what poets and romantics contended.  
  
It was too late in the evening to make any important decisions about his life, and there was no need to hurry things along. Soun decided it would be best to get some sleep, and tackle the problem tomorrow. His wife would be there. Thanks to the fickleness of Fate, she would always be there, even if she didn't love him the way he loved her. Above anything else, he could live with that. As long as she was safe and alive.   
  
With that sobering thought, Soun entered his home and prepared for bed, content for the moment, if not truly happy.   
  
xxxxxxxx  
  
Special thanks to:  
  
The Apprentice  
  
Chris Horton  
  
Michael A. Chase  
  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
  
Max M.  
  
David Tai 


	15. The Things We Wish For Chapter 12

The Things We Wish For...  
  
Chapter 11  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/d_b_sommer/index.html  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing fics, at   
  
http://www.hostultra.com/~AngCobraFics/dbsommer.html  
  
At fanfiction.net:  
  
http://www.fanfiction.net/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
  
http://www.fanworks.org  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
[Author's forward: Back to a more (relatively) normal bent with this one.]  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"All I'm saying is I can get you that rematch you want with Mom if you give me the rematch I want."  
  
"I already gave you the terms for a rematch with me."  
  
"Fine. Two dates if you win."  
  
"And only one if you win."  
  
"Why don't we make it all or nothing?"  
  
"No!" Kachiko slammed her fist down on the dining room table. "You have to agree to one date just to get the fight started, and I get a second if I win."  
  
"Sounds to me like you're afraid of losing," Ranma taunted, unconcerned with his tone since he and Kachiko were alone in the room. Others in the household tended to become irritable when he was anything but courteous with the 'newest' addition to the Tendou family.  
  
"Yep. It's called, 'hedging your bet,' something you never do since you seem to be under the impression that you never lose."  
  
Ranma crossed his arms in disdain. "I don't."  
  
"Yes, yes. You only suffer 'temporary setbacks'," Kachiko said drolly. "Let me tell you something about that." She began wagging her finger at Ranma, only to stop and clutch her back as she winced in pain.  
  
Ranma's attitude switched from taunting to one of concern. "What's wrong?"  
  
"Cramp in my back. I get them sometimes." Kachiko winced again, then turned her back to Ranma. "Could you massage me a bit, get the circulation flowing?"  
  
"Sure. I get them sometimes, too. It hurts like the..." Ranma trailed off as Kachiko raised the back of her shirt, revealing nothing but bared flesh, her bra absent.  
  
Ranma rose to his feet, retreating toward the door toward the backyard. "I just remembered, I've got to fight Ryouga today. He gets lonely if he doesn't get angry with me at some point during the week. Bye." The moment he cleared the threshold, he bolted through the yard and over the wall.   
  
Kachiko ran to the doorway and shouted out, "Tachi-chan would have had the guts to massage me!" She slammed the door hard enough to nearly shatter the frame. "I can't believe he'd pass up the opportunity to massage my back. I wonder if someone messed with a pressure point connected to his sex drive or something."   
  
A voice from behind Kachiko said, "Don't you get tired to trying to force Ranma to date you? It's obvious he doesn't want to."  
  
Slowly, a sly, and not altogether comforting, smile, formed on Kachiko's face. She turned and met the steady gaze of her accuser: Akane.  
  
"For your information, Ranma is something of a weenie boy. I knew guys like him back in school, though I never went out with one. They're indecisive when it comes to girls, usually because they've never dated one before. They always need a little push to get them going. Once they learn how much fun hanging out with the opposite gender is, they loosen up and tend to act normal. So this is really for Ranma's own good." Kachiko smiled smugly.  
  
"Oh, please. This is for your own good and no one else's, just like everyone else that bothers Ranma. He'll be happy if you leave him alone."  
  
"No, I like him. I'm going to give him a chance to win me over. If he manages to, who knows what will happen."  
  
Akane began turning red with anger. "He's my fiancé!"  
  
Kachiko's attitude went from sly and taunting to cold. "He'll be the fiancé of whoever he wants to be, including no one, if that's what he wants. I can't think of anything more terrible than being forced into a marriage you don't want. If anyone tries making him marry, including his parents or the creepy old guy, and Ranma doesn't want to, they'll have to go through me first."  
  
"You're trying to force him to date you," Akane stated in just as chilling tones, the girls near mirror images of one another.  
  
"It's not the same thing. I'm helping him broaden his horizons, which he's going to have to do eventually since he's way too afraid of dating for his own good. Besides, it's not like I'm forcing him to commit to anything. Actually, it's the opposite. I won't let him commit to me until we've dated a few times, and I decide if he's worth keeping around for a long term thing, which would be way in the future, since we're both so young."  
  
"Back off from Ranma," Akane warned.  
  
Rather than act intimidated, Kachiko laughed. "If you're so hot and bothered about controlling who he should and shouldn't date, why don't you ask him out? Get him wrapped around your finger and you won't have to worry about a thing. I've done it to lots of guys. Like... like... umm, like...."   
  
A confused look passed over her features. She began scratching her head in puzzlement. The scratching turned into hair pulling. Just as it seemed the tufts would be coming out by their roots, Kachiko released her hold and turned to Akane and shouted, "If I had met any guy worth keeping around, I'd have wrapped him around my finger! I could do it! I could!" She stomped off, muttering under her breath about meeting nothing but an unending chain of losers.  
  
Akane, anger not assuaged in the slightest, huffed to herself and headed for the front door. Mother or not, she'd show that darn Kachiko.   
  
Xxxxxxxxx  
  
With it being dinnertime, and gut instinct telling him it would be best to not be at home for a while, Ranma had opted to eat at the restaurant nearest to where he was: Ucchan's. As he had expected, the food was good and the service prompt as Ukyou reserved most of her attention for him. It made for a pleasing eating experience.  
  
He was just about to devour his second okonomiyaki, Ukyou beaming in approval of his hearty appetite, when Akane stormed into the shop and stomped her way to him.  
  
She grabbed Ranma by the back of the pigtail, and pulled him away from the counter. "Come on, Ranma, we're going out."  
  
"See you later!" Ranma called out to Ukyou as he was pulled out of the restaurant, food left behind on the counter.  
  
"Hey, you didn't pay yet!" Ukyou called out, slightly irritated, though not at the lack of payment. Why hadn't she thought of taking the direct approach to get him to go out with her?  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko hummed merrily to herself as she skipped down the stairs, taking long strides that were closer to leaps. Her feet came into contact with the steps only three times before she landed lightly upon the wooden floor below.  
  
Upon arriving at the bottom, she took a moment to reexamine her clothing. A better part of an hour had been spent painstakingly choosing an ensemble that would elicit a precise reaction from the male of the species. It was a newer style that she would never have been allowed to wear in her time, one that would have made her parents disown her on the spot if they saw her wearing it. She wore a white sleeveless top that was actually more of a front, since it lacked a back. Instead it was a collection of strings that tied around the back and neck to hold it in place. Likewise, she didn't bother wearing a bra. The shorts she wore were black, tight around her backside, and worn low, so the top string of the thong underneath peeked above the waistband, broadcasting to the world her choice in undergarments. Having a string riding through the crack of her bottom was a bit uncomfortable, but sacrifices were necessary if she was going to entice Ranma into acting like a normal guy. The clothing only accentuated her demure, yet fit, frame. It was the best she could come up with. If it didn't work, nothing would.  
  
With a light step she danced across the floor and into the living room. "Oh Ranma, where are you?" she called out in a sing-song voice.  
  
There was no answer. Disappointed that her prey failed to respond to her mating call, she headed toward the bath. Seeing no occupied sign up, Kachiko began considering her choices. The Saotome bedroom remained, but that would mean possibly running into Ranma's evil (and elderly) mother. There was no way he was in the girls' bedrooms; he wouldn't even massage her bare back when asked to do so. Maybe he was in the backyard, and on the way there, she could check out the kitchen as well.  
  
As Kachiko strolled into the kitchen, she saw only Kasumi was present, wiping down some of the cutting boards.   
  
Kasumi started to greet her mother when she saw what Kachiko was wearing. She drew back, aghast, then pulled the tablecloth from the table and ran toward Kachiko. "Mother, put some clothes on before someone sees you like that."  
  
Kachiko fended off the attempts to be draped in the cover. "Knock it off! I'm dressed to go out and have a good time. Now, where's Ranma?"  
  
"Akane called a little while ago and said she and Ranma wouldn't be back for dinner since they were out on a date."  
  
"WHAT?!" Kachiko shrieked. "When I told her to ask him out on a date, I didn't mean she should actually ask him out! She was supposed to get angry at the implication she likes him and stomp off, growling she doesn't care about him, like people like her always do! Actually asking him out goes against everything Nabiki told me she's done before! I can't believe she outmaneuvered me like this!"  
  
The earlier delight disappeared, replaced by a dark miasma of anger. "I'll show that idiot Ranma. I'll go out with Tachi-kun, and we'll have such a good time it'll make that dummy sorry. I might even enjoy Tachi-kun so much I'll just ignore Ranma from now on and rub his face in the fact Tachi-kun's so much cooler than him."  
  
Kasumi interjected herself at that point. "I have a much better idea, Mother."  
  
"It's Kachi, and what?"  
  
"You could go out with Father instead of Mr. Kunou and make Ranma insanely jealous." Kasumi unleashed a satisfied smile at her ingenious plan.  
  
Kachiko exited the kitchen. She returned a moment later with a bar of soap clenched in her grasp. She handed it to Kasumi.  
  
Kasumi looked at it curiously. "Are you telling me to bathe?" She sniffed the air, seeking any telltale signs that she needed to use more deodorant.   
  
Kachiko shook her head. "Didn't I teach you that when you say dirty things you're supposed to wash your mouth out with soap?"  
  
Kasumi stared down at the bar of soap with distaste. Curiously, Kachiko was correct. Though she was a little child at the time, Kasumi did remember others commenting on her having a 'potty mouth.' It wasn't until her mother washed her mouth out with some lye that Kasumi became more mindful of her tongue. The taste was so wretched, and had lingered for so long, that she never spoke that way again. Even now, years later, she still refused to say bad things to anyone under any circumstances.   
  
While Kasumi stared mournfully at the bar, Kachiko went to the phone and dialed Kunou's number. It was answered after only two rings. "Hello, is Tachi-kun there?... Yes, I mean Tatewaki.... He's not?... He's having kendo practice?... Why that ingrate! I was going to ask him out tonight so he could have a good time and one up Ranma, but since he's not going to wait by the phone for me to call, then he can have fun playing with his bokken!"   
  
She slammed the receiver down in its cradle, causing the phone to rattle. She stomped her foot like a petulant child. "I wanted to go out tonight. Now what am I going to do? It's no fun going out on your own. Only losers do that."  
  
Kachiko's eyes roamed the room, wondering what she should do. Nabiki, who was rapidly becoming semi-fun to hang out with, was visiting one of her friends until late tonight. There was no one in school Kachiko was close to. Outside of school, she didn't know anyone that wasn't twenty years older than her now.   
  
That wasn't quite true. There was one alternative to going out alone. Literally only one.  
  
Kasumi was about to place the bar of soap in her mouth when it was snatched out of her hand.   
  
"Eating soap's bad for you. Only little kids do it," Kachiko told her.   
  
"But you said-"  
  
"Never mind what I said before. The only thing that matters is what I'm saying to you now. Where do you go to have fun?"  
  
Kasumi pondered that one. She began counting the number of places one at a time. "Well, there's the grocers. The fish market. Sometimes I go to Dr. Tofu, he's a local doctor, and borrow books from him. Oh yes, and on the far side of town, there's this Museum of Cookware--"  
  
Kachiko slapped a hand across Kasumi's mouth. "Enough! I'm going to save you from yourself."  
  
Kasumi smiled at her mother and the willingness she showed to go out of her way to help her oldest daughter, even if Kasumi was uncertain of what she needed 'saving' from.   
  
As though able to read her mind, Kachiko removed her hand from the mouth and placed both of them reassuringly on Kasumi's shoulders. "It's obvious the lack of a strong maternal figure in your life has caused an inability within you to determine right from wrong, as well as fun from boring. I will take it upon myself to teach you the error of your ways."  
  
Kasumi smiled beatifically upon her mother. "Thank you. What shall I do?"  
  
"Get changed for a night on the town. We're going out to a club where they have cheap drinks and cheaper guys."  
  
"And do what?"  
  
"Enjoy lots of both." Kachiko finally started to grow enthusiastic at the prospect of going out, even if it wasn't with her first or second choice of companion.   
  
"I'm not sure that's such a good idea," Kasumi said hesitantly.   
  
Not wanting to put a damper on the upcoming festivities, and determined to help out someone that had been prematurely turned into an old spinster, Kachiko enticed the girl by saying, "We'll do some mother and daughter bonding while we're there. What better time for it than going out together?"  
  
That disposed of Kasumi's final reservations. "I'll get changed into something nice."  
  
"Why don't we kick off the bonding by letting me help you choose the clothes?" Kachiko followed close behind Kasumi as they went upstairs to her room. When one went out clubbing, one dressed in something 'Not Nice' which was part of the point in going out. It might take some work, but Kachiko had faith in her abilities to find something presentable for the poor, naive, boring girl. It was time for Kasumi to stop being someone else's mother and live it up a little.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Nodoka exited the bedroom she and her husband were using during their stay at the Tendous. She would have felt she was imposing on their host's hospitality, save that there was someone else who was imposing far more than her and her family. Teach Kachiko to be a proper woman? She'd sooner be able to teach her manly son to prance about in a dress and make passes at men than teach the undisciplined girl anything beyond 'Don't scratch yourself in public,' if that.  
  
If only Ranma hadn't displayed such an unhealthy interest in the girl. Thankfully, no one else seemed to know he had slept with her on at least one occasion. And who knew what he did with her when they were alone and away from the house? It was chilling to the core. If only he would settle down with one of the other Tendou girls. Or even the okonomiyaki girl. Or the Chinese one. Or the rich girl that dropped by from time to time. She was a happy person, laughing in delight nearly every time Nodoka saw her. Ranma could marry her. It would get nothing but approval from her. Any girl would do, except for the annoying pestilence to humanity that traveled in the guise of Kachiko Tendou.  
  
Nodoka pushed those frantic thoughts from her mind. There was no need to concern herself with the Kachiko issue tonight. It was time for Nodoka to help earn her keep and prepare dinner with the epitome of propriety, Kasumi. Now there was a girl that would make a wonderful wife for Ranma. While it was ultimately who her son loved that Nodoka wanted him to marry, she had her own personal favorites as to who she would choose to call daughter-in-law. Kasumi was near the top of the list.   
  
Nodoka entered the kitchen. It was silent, though there was an assortment of food left lying about, obviously ready to be cooked. "Kasumi, are you here?"  
  
"Behind you, Auntie."  
  
Nodoka turned around to see a girl behind her, wearing a black shirt that was both too tight around her chest and too short; it barely reached halfway down her midriff. It was complemented by a black leather mini-skirt that showed a scandalous amount of leg.   
  
It took a moment to register the identity of the girl. "Kasumi?!"  
  
Kasumi nodded. "Yes, I meant to ask you, Auntie, could you finish dinner? I've already prepared the ingredients. You'll only have to make enough for you, Mr. Saotome, and Father, since no one else will be around. I'm going out with Mother. We're going to do some mother and daughter bonding. I'm really very excited."  
  
Nodoka's hand trembled as she pointed at Kasumi. "Clothes?"  
  
Kasumi fingered the top and blushed. "It's Mother's idea. She said nothing I owned would be appropriate for where we were going, so she insisted I wear some of her clothes. They're a bit small."  
  
"And appropriate for a bordello," Nodoka said.   
  
"It's to give the guys some eye candy, something you'd never be mistaken for with those cellulite-laden thighs of yours," Kachiko stated as she strolled down the stairs, still in the clothing she had been wearing earlier.   
  
Nodoka stared in disapproval at the girl. "What you are wearing is shameless."  
  
"It's a good thing I have no shame, then."   
  
Nodoka pointed accusingly at the girl. "You are nothing more than an immoral tramp!"  
  
"And you are an old frump that's forgotten what it means to cut loose and enjoy herself. Instead you act like a retired geriatric who thinks everyone else should be the same way. Well I've got news for you, hag, I'm still young and got a new lease on life I ain't blowing. And I'm not letting you force me or this poor girl into the early spinsterhood you seem so fond of." Kachiko grabbed Kasumi by the arm and pulled her toward the front door.  
  
Kasumi started, "But Auntie's not a spin-"  
  
"Yes, yes she is. She might have known how to have fun a couple of decades ago, but she's long since forgotten. Come on."  
  
Kasumi waved a final good-bye to Nodoka before being pulled out of sight.  
  
Nodoka looked on in shock, unable to find her voice. Now the girl's corruption had spread to Kasumi. Oh, what tragedy had befallen the Tendou household. Perhaps it would be best to dispose of the arrangement to unite the families before Ranma was forced to marry the awful Kachiko girl.  
  
Nodoka returned to her room in a huff. How dare that little brat call her an old spinster! She was not old, and she knew how to have fun. While it might have been true that she had been more active when she was younger, that didn't mean she didn't have fun now. She did. She had fun all the time.   
  
Despite her mental reassurances, the incorrigible girl's words nagged at Nodoka, and she couldn't seem to dismiss them as easily as she should. Unable to ignore or forget them, that left only one solution to the problem.  
  
Sliding the door to the bedroom open, she confronted her husband, who was lazing about in his panda form. "Genma, I still know how to have fun, don't I?"  
  
Genma suddenly became furtive. He held up a sign. *Don't ask me. I'm just a panda.*  
  
"Stop that this instant!" Nodoka ordered, making the animal wince. "I'm being serious. I need to know: am I boring and frumpy? And don't tell me what I want to hear. I demand you answer honestly."  
  
The panda began sweating. Reluctantly, he held up another sign. *You're a mature, serious person that has a family to deal with. I approve of it wholeheartedly.*  
  
Nodoka looked at him, crestfallen. "So you're saying the girl is right and I am frumpy?"  
  
*Absolutely not!" he signed, then brought another one up. *Can I go now? I need to wax my head.*  
  
Nodoka sniffled. "Go ahead. Run off and have fun, since it's obvious I don't know how to have any and would just drag you down."  
  
The panda's shoulders sagged. Slowly, he shuffled his furry form over and placed one of his large arms around Nodoka. *Why don't we go out and do something fun?*  
  
Nodoka darted out of his grasp, refusing to be comforted. "She's right. I'm not fun anymore. I used to like going out and doing things, especially when you were courting me. It was after we got married and I had Ranma so quickly that I became this tired old housewife." She held her arms out hopelessly.  
  
The panda looked at his wife in sympathy. He brought a paw to his chin in thought. After several moments, he held up a sign.  
  
Nodoka read it and blushed. "We can't do that! We're not young anymore. And what if we got caught? It would be scandalous, and we'd be arrested. Why, Ranma would probably leave the family rather than deal with the shame. I still can't believe you talked me into it in the first place."  
  
*Hey! You were the one that suggest it to me,* the panda signed defensively.  
  
"I did no such thing..." Nodoka trailed off as the memory returned. "Actually, Achika was the one that suggested it to me. I happened to mention to her that I thought you were losing interest in me, and she suggested we do that. I admit, I thought if you liked the idea, you might show me more attention if we did it." And it had worked, as she recalled. Genma had been more than happy to entertain her for some considerable time afterwards.   
  
Nodoka reconsidered the suggestion. "While we can't do that, why don't we do something similar, but with less risk involved?"  
  
Genma held up another sign.  
  
Nodoka's eyes bulged slightly. Then she turned suspicious. "That would be interesting. However, it doesn't seem like the sort of thing you'd come up with on the spur of the moment, though. It's a bit elaborate."  
  
The panda shifted uncomfortably. *I overheard someone mention it once, and I thought it sounded like it might be fun to do with you.*  
  
"Why didn't you ask before?"  
  
Genma became nervous again.  
  
"You thought I was too frumpy to want to do such a thing, didn't you?"  
  
Now Genma looked like he wanted to escape.   
  
That settled things in Nodoka's mind. "We'll go out and buy the necessary items, and then go to the part of town you suggested. But first, get some hot water. I have no intention of doing that sort of thing while you're a panda."  
  
*One bucket of hot water coming right up!* Genma signed, then loped out of the room at top speed.  
  
Nodoka smiled at his enthusiasm. It reminded her that Genma could act like a true husband, with the proper motivation. She'd have to remember that for future reference, in case she felt old and frumpy again.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane smiled at how wonderfully everything had gone. And to think, she had her interfering mother to thank for it.  
  
In forcing the issue, Akane's asking Ranma out had resulted in the two of them having a wonderful time at the local amusement park. Riding side by side on the attractions, eating the various unhealthy foods offered at the park, and reveling in each other's company without the interference of others, had served to lighten Akane's mood more than any time in recent memory. Once she thought about it, she hadn't had Ranma truly to herself since her mother's return. While events had always been active in their lives before, things had turned frantic with Kachiko living under the same roof. Between the issues the various members of the family had with her, in connection with the girl's own outrageous behavior, there was rarely a moment of peace to be found.  
  
Now an oasis in the chaos had been discovered. It was such a blessing to have Ranma all to herself, Akane mused. It would have been nicer if Ranma had been the one initiating things, but of late, it was hard to rely on him for anything. He accepted the postponement of the engagement rather than fighting for it. He wasn't paying attention to Akane the way he should have been. He didn't reject Kachiko's attentions with the vehemence he was supposed to. For that matter, he spent too much time with Kachiko period. Why couldn't he treat her the way he did Kodachi, or at least Ukyou? Instead he acted like the time lost girl was being set upon by others, when all they were trying to do was make Kachiko act normal. Far too often he ended up taking her side when he should have been on the family's. But that was Ranma. He didn't think things through and tended to be insensitive. Akane knew that from the beginning. It's just things would have gone much more smoothly if he acted responsibly, thought about his treatment of others, and stated what he wanted.  
  
Today he was acting perfectly fine. It was obvious he was enjoying himself, and subsequently Akane's presence. It would have helped if he'd do something more to indicate how much he liked her being around, like holding her hand or a similar gesture, but Akane was content to accept what was given to her. It made her realize just how nice it was to be with him during these quiet moments with only the two of them around and no one harassing them continuously. If only it could stretch on forever. She'd do just about anything to have Ranma to herself like this for the rest of her life.   
  
The thought had taken hold of her mind. Akane decided to test the waters further. "Ranma, I was thinking about the engagement."  
  
"Don't worry about it. It's on hold."  
  
That wasn't the answer she was looking for. She also hadn't counted on being cut off so abruptly. Ranma's rudeness was showing again. Why couldn't he be more understanding to her wants and needs?  
  
Before she could venture toward the subject again, Ranma pointed at a poster hanging next to a café in a more quiet area of the park. "What's that?"  
  
Akane examined the item in question. "It says there's a hypnotist performing at the café."  
  
Ranma shook his head at the poster. "Ah, that hypnotism stuff is a crock. Only people with weak wills and stuff fall for it. You wouldn't catch me acting stupid just because someone waves some shiny object in front of my eyes."  
  
"Let's check it out." Akane always had a fascination with hypnotism. More importantly, it would give them a chance to sit there and enjoy each other's company even longer. Also, Ranma wouldn't find it so easy to run if he was sitting there stuffing his face.  
  
Ranma shrugged. "Why not? I'm hungry anyway."  
  
The two entered the café, which possessed a very cozy atmosphere despite being located in the middle of an amusement park. A waitress ushered them to a table near the stage. The hypnotist in question was already in the middle of his act. He wore a garish green and red ringmaster's type outfit with purple stars on the legs and arms. The worst part of the ensemble was the ridiculous circle stuck to the front of his top hat. It had concentric black and white rings around the surface, and would spin on its own, independent of his motions.   
  
On the stage, sitting on a chair, was one of the café's patrons. There was a glassy look to his eyes, and he was acting as though he was driving an invisible car rather than sitting in front of group of strangers.   
  
"See? It's silly. I'd never do something stupid like that. I'm impossible to hypnotize," Ranma stated as he took his chair and began watching the performance in spite of his stated disdain for it.  
  
"I have to go to the restroom." Akane rose to her feet and headed off.  
  
Xxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma breathed a sigh of relief. The whole day had been weird. First there was the whole problem of Kachiko flirting with him, which had made him incredibly uncomfortable. While he had deftly avoided that situation, Akane came along and asked him to go to the amusement park with her. It seemed odd, since she had never shown that much of an interest in such places. He didn't want her to have to go alone, and amusement parks did tend to be kind of fun, so he agreed. It turned out to be the right choice. He and Akane had a great time on the rides and stuffing their faces on all the great food. It was nice to enjoy himself in a non pressure situation where no one was making any demands of him.   
  
The only minor problem was that bit about the engagement she had tried bringing up. He had avoided that easily enough by pointing out the first thing that had caught his eye. Thinking about something that pressured him like that was the exact opposite of what he wanted to do. Luckily, she had let the matter rest rather than trying to ruin his day by pestering him about something he didn't want to think about. With each day that passed, and the weight off his shoulders of being harassed about marriage, he realized that putting the engagement on hold was the right choice. He was only sorry he hadn't thought of it sooner. And to think, he had Kachiko to thank for it.  
  
However, as much as he owed her for alleviating some of the stress in his life, he was grateful it wasn't Kachiko who had asked him along to the amusement park. She probably would have tried to make it into a date or something. At least Akane was reliable about not trying to make him do something like that. She was content to just hang around with him, with no expectations.   
  
"Excuse me, sir?"  
  
The statement shook Ranma out of his thoughts. Before him was the hypnotist. A quick look showed the person that had been on the stage had now returned to his seat, shifting uncomfortably at the attention he was receiving. Ranma felt he understood the man's situation, as the crowd's attention was now directed at him, thanks to the hypnotist.   
  
"Yeah, what do you want?" Ranma asked.  
  
With a flourish to the crowd, the man said, "I could not help overhearing your boast about being impossible to hypnotize."  
  
That sounded vaguely like a challenge. Instincts rising to the fore, Ranma kicked back in his chair and put his feet on the table. "Yeah, that's right. That hypnotism stuff doesn't work on me. My mind's way too sharp to fall for something like that."  
  
"I see. I see." The hypnotist sounded as though he was uncertain of the boast. "Well, perhaps you could help me with a little demonstration, my confident friend."  
  
"What kind of demonstration?"  
  
The hypnotist pulled a small gold chain from his breast pocket. A shiny gold coin was attached to the chain. He began waving it back and forth in front of Ranma's eyes. "Look into the pretty coin of gold, and you will do as you are told."  
  
Xxxxxxxx  
  
Akane stared at herself in the mirror. Everything had been going perfectly today. She had taken a chance by asking Ranma out on a date, and it had paid off big for her. Now it was time to go for broke. If she was successful, it would be over at last and the situation that had been plaguing her for so long finally resolved. And if she wasn't....  
  
No! She would be successful. It was long past time something went her way. She was confident that things would work out. If Ranma wasn't interested in her, he would never have accepted going out on the date in the first place. She knew she was the one he was interested in. She knew it.   
  
Hands trembling in a mix of anticipation and fear, Akane exited the restroom and headed for the table she and Ranma shared. There was no sense in waiting any longer. It was time to go for it.  
  
Her attention was fixated on Ranma as she sat down in the seat next to him. Fearful of losing her nerve, she blurted out, "Ranma, I want to restart the engagement because I love you and want you to marry me."  
  
In response, Ranma leaped upon the table and began hopping back and forth, uttering bestial sounds, like he was a monkey.  
  
Akane looked on him in shock. Tearfully she cried out, "You don't have to make fun of me! All you had to do was say no!" She gave him a solid right, punching him clear of the table and onto the stage. Tears streaming from her eyes, she wailed in sorrow, not caring what anyone thought as she ran off deeper into the amusement park.  
  
Everyone in the room was silent, save for the hypnotist who meekly said to Ranma, "Oops. Sorry about that. Usually people laugh when I hypnotize the person they're with into thinking they're a monkey. I'd have to say this is the worst case of timing in my life."  
  
Ranma gave a loud "Eep!" in agreement.  
  
Xxxxxxxxx  
  
The Ferris wheel operator scratched his head as he watched the handyman examine the operating level carefully.   
  
"I don't know what's wrong with it, but I'm sure it felt funny," the operator said.  
  
The handyman nodded. "It looks like some of the gears are slipping and the wiring on the control panel's shot. It could go at any time. I keep telling them they need to sink more money into replacing some of the parts, but they won't listen to me."  
  
"I know the feeling," the operator agreed. "Do I need to shut her down?"  
  
"Yep, unless you like the idea of the whole thing going out of control."  
  
"No thanks. I don't think I need the lawsoof!" the man grunted someone ran past, knocking him aside as though he wasn't there. The impact threw him into the handyman, who grasped out at anything to keep from falling over.   
  
As he did so, his hand struck the panel, starting the Ferris wheel, before he found himself buried under the operator.  
  
"Would you get off me?!" the handyman spluttered as he tried to rise to his feet.  
  
"It wasn't my fault!" the operator insisted. "Someone knocked me over."  
  
The handyman stared at the Ferris wheel. "You mean that girl that jumped into one of the cars right before the thing started up?"  
  
The operator looked up to see that indeed, someone had run into the car. He tried stopping the wheel, but all that met him was the sound of gears giving out.  
  
"I think we have a problem," the operator said.  
  
"I'd say hers is worse than ours," the handyman said as he stared up at the wheel as the car continued moving toward the top.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Akane's eyes were blurry as she sat in the car of the Ferris wheel, finding privacy in a place where no one could disturb her. What she needed was solitude for her broken heart.  
  
She hated Ranma, hated him more than anyone she had ever hated in her entire life. It was made all the worse by the fact she still loved him more than anyone else as well. Why couldn't he have accepted her heart? After all they had been through, all they had shared, why couldn't he just say he wanted to marry her the way she wanted to be with him? She was certain he had said he loved her when he thought she was going to die on Mount Phoenix. He couldn't have changed his mind. Not after that. It wasn't the way things worked. When you professed to love someone under those circumstances, it was forever. That was the reason she had consented to the surprise marriage directly afterwards. She knew they were meant for each other and it would last a lifetime.  
  
It was that damned Kachiko's fault. That was it. She had put thoughts in Ranma's head about it being too young to marry and that it would be a mistake and that it should be postponed, if not nullified outright. She had run her mouth off about it repeatedly, and Ranma was gullible enough to believe the babble she spouted. Kachiko was wrong. There was such a thing as 'true love' and destiny. She and Ranma had shared both. It was only thanks to Kachiko's interference that things had turned out otherwise.   
  
There was no way Kachiko was her mother. Not really. No mother could ruin a daughter's life so thoroughly. She was an impostor that had no business being there. Akane was sorry she made the wish in the first place. If she had it do all over again, she would wish the girl wasn't around any more. She wished she was still dead and things could go back to the way they were.  
  
But they wouldn't. Things were what they were, and Akane had nothing left. It was over.  
  
The sounds of gears groaning and the car jerking back and forth finally drew Akane out of her sorrow-filled thoughts. She wiped her eyes, wondering what the men operating the wheel were doing.   
  
Now at the highest point of the spin, Akane looked down at the ground and saw a large group of people gathered around the bottom, staring at the wheel. She wondered what was going on, then saw several of the gears shoot away from the center where the wheel was connected to the stand. Several of them headed toward the crowd, forcing them to scatter. They barely got out of the way before the parts struck the ground, hitting hard enough to break concrete.   
  
The wheel shuddered, coming to a complete stop. Despite the lack of movement, Akane could feel the entire structure shake as internal forces, unable to be released, built up. This was bad. From this height, Akane would be badly injured in a fall, if not killed outright.  
  
Her panic was momentarily sidetracked by a figure in red that streaked toward the wheel, opposite the direction that everyone else was heading. The figure got to the bottom of the wheel, then began climbing upward with an inhuman agility.  
  
It took Akane only a moment to figure out who it was. It was the man who was always there to rescue her when she found herself in trouble. The one who was always there in her time of need.   
  
Except the one time when she truly needed him.  
  
"Go away, Ranma!" she cried out through the open window.   
  
Ranma hesitated a moment. Then the wheel shifted dangerously again. That prodded him into motion and he continued scampering up the side of the wheel. Soon he was hanging from the bottom of Akane's car, swinging back and forth from one arm, unmindful of the open space between him and the ground. He began grunting at Akane again.  
  
"I said leave me alone!" Akane shouted, wishing she had something to throw at him and drive him off. Seeing him was like being stabbed in the heart again and again.  
  
Ranma swung up to the side of the car, making more noises at Akane.  
  
She shouted, "Quit babbling like an idiot, you jerk! I don't want your help! I don't want to be saved by you! You already said you didn't love me!" It then occurred to her that he hadn't exactly said he wasn't interested as much as he acted like he wasn't, making fun of her with his babbling when she had bared her soul.  
  
Except, he was still babbling inanely, not saying a word. And then there was his exceptional agility when scaling the wheel. While Ranma was as limber as a Chinese acrobat, he had come up the side of the wheel as though he was running across flat ground, if not faster. Even he had never displayed that kind of nimbleness. And then there was the bizarre grunting. It was almost as bad as when he was meowing in the nekoken. Except he wasn't acting like a cat. It was more like a monkey. No. It was exactly like a monkey.  
  
"Oh Ranma, I'm so, so sorry!" Akane said as the truth of the situation dawned on her. His father must have tied a bunch of bananas around him and threw him in a pit of starving monkeys, and Ranma had been too ashamed to admit it. It was a monkey-ken, or some other idiotic move, probably to increase his agility. She was really going to give Genma a piece of her mind this time.   
  
It was in the middle of the vow that the final bolts connecting the wheel to the center gave out. The wheel fell to the ground, remaining upright despite not being attached to anything. Despite not falling far, it made a loud crash as it hit the earth. It sat there for a moment, motionless. Then slowly, inexorably, the wheel began rolling, following the downhill grade it had rested upon.  
  
"Oh my god!" Akane shrieked as she saw the cars touching the ground, cars whose bottoms extended beyond the circular structure of the wheel, crumple under the weight poised above them.  
  
Ranma reached through the window, grabbing Akane and bearing her in his arms. As the wheel continued rolling, gaining momentum, he leapt up to the top of one of the pair of metal rails that made up the edge of the wheel's structure, and began running along it, just fast enough to stay at the top of the wheel as it continued rolling.  
  
Akane clung tightly to Ranma, afraid to look down. Ordinarily she wasn't afraid of heights, but in this case, she was more than ready to make an exception.  
  
"All we need to do is wait for the wheel to bump into something, like a building so it'll stop rolling," Akane told herself.   
  
While the idea was good, Akane discovered one slight problem with it: there were no structures in the wheel's path. The only thing that threatened to stop their progress was the edge of a steep drop, since the amusement park was built on the top of an extended plateau. With nothing in the way, the wheel picked up speed as it drew ever closer to the edge.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Bystanders watched in horror as the wheel plummeted over the side. Within seconds, they heard the crash of metal and plastic as tons of amusement ride met the rocks below.  
  
"Those poor people," someone said.  
  
"They'll never survive that drop," another commented.  
  
"Maybe they caught on to the side of the cliff," another said hopefully.  
  
"Nah, the drop's sheer. You'd have to be a monkey to climb that thing."  
  
It was at that moment Ranma finished climbing up over the edge, Akane holding on tightly around his neck.  
  
A sound of disappointment filled the air.  
  
"Shoot, no dead bodies to stare at. Let's go back to the Tilt O' Whirl and ride it until we throw up."  
  
"Cool."  
  
With nothing further of interest happening, the crowd dispersed.  
  
"That was... close," Akane said.   
  
Ranma gave a loud "Eep!" in agreement.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko stretched her head back, pouring the contents of the glass down her throat. It felt like drinking liquid fire as every inch of flesh that came into contact with it burned. Her eyes blurred in pain from the path the liquid took.  
  
"'Prairie Fire' is aptly named, isn't it?" the bartender asked.  
  
"Got that right." Kachiko wiped the tears from her eyes. Even her nose was running from the effect of the mixture of Tequila and Tabasco. "Let me try something else."  
  
"How about sex on the beach?"  
  
Kachiko reached across the bar and grabbed the man by the collar of his shirt. "That had better be a drink you're offering me instead of a proposition."  
  
"It is," he assured her in a quavering voice.  
  
The light of realization dawned in Kachiko's eyes, though the light was dim due to the amount of alcohol she had consumed. "In that case, gimme one."  
  
"You should probably let go of me, first."  
  
"That would help, wouldn't it?" Kachiko gave him a peck on the cheek in apology and released her hold on his collar.   
  
The show of affection lightened the bartender's mood as he mixed the drink in question.   
  
He had placed a shot glass in front of Kachiko when Kasumi staggered toward the bar, nearly stumbling into it.  
  
Kachiko steadied her. "Whoa, there. Having some problems walking, huh?"  
  
"Not really," Kasumi said blissfully, then spotted the shot glass. She pointed in its general direction. "Is that for me?"  
  
"No," Kachiko said.  
  
"Good." Kasumi picked up the glass and downed the contents in a quick gulp before Kachiko could stop her.   
  
"That was mine." Kachiko stared mournfully at the empty vessel.  
  
"Would you like it back?" Kasumi offered.  
  
"No, that's all right. You keep it. I'm sure you'll put it to good use." She patted Kasumi on the head. "You know, I was afraid you'd be an angry drunk, like Wakaba, but you're actually pretty lively without being rude. You should drink more often."  
  
"How about now?" Kasumi asked.  
  
"No, it's probably best you not drink for a while. Drink any more, and you'll be floating away like a fish." Kachiko laughed hard at her own perceived joke.  
  
Kasumi frowned. "You know, despite how much I've drunken, that still doesn't sound remotely funny."  
  
"I bet if you had another drink it'd be funny."  
  
Kasumi shook her head. "There's not enough alcohol in the world. I'm sorry, Mother."  
  
"Kachi! Kachi!" the time lost girl insisted. "People will think we're in some kind of kinky relationship if you call me that."  
  
Kasumi held up her hand, as though something had just occurred to her. "I almost forgot. I came over here for a reason."  
  
"To steal my drinks?"  
  
"If you'd like," Kasumi said.   
  
"It wasn't an offer. It was an answer to the question. Now why did you come over here?"  
  
It took Kasumi a moment to collect her thoughts. "Oh, yes. I've been spending time dancing with some men that are sweet enough to buy me drinks. As many as I want. However, when we've been dancing, some of them having been grabbing my bottom and grinding their crotches into me. While it's not an altogether unpleasant feeling, especially down in 'that place,' I'm not sure this is appropriate behavior. I wanted your advice on what to do about it."  
  
Kachiko accepted another Harvey Wallbanger from the bartender, drinking it in order to help her consider the matter. "My advice is, if you think they're hot, knee them in the groin. And if they're ugly, let 'em keep going as far as you want."  
  
"Thanks. You're always full of wonderful advice." Kasumi headed back toward the men.  
  
Within moments, high pitched wails of pain reached Kachiko's ears. She scratched her head in confusion. "I think there might have been something off in what I said just now. Nah." She decided it was probably for the best. Sleeping with someone while drunk was usually not a good idea. Unless it was the guy who was drunk and the girl wanted to sleep with them, in which case that was fine. It was too bad Ranma wasn't along. Kachiko wondered what he'd be like drunk. Probably a real goof that made everyone around him laugh. He seemed the type.  
  
A voice from Kachiko's right said, "Turn the channel to something interesting," to the bartender.   
  
Kachiko watched the bartender move to change the channel of the television that hung above the bar. Much to her shock, it showed a picture of Ranma and Akane. Kachiko scowled as the man of her dreams (well, one of the men of her dreams, along with Tatewaki) was hanging from Akane's neck while she supported him in her arms.  
  
Kachiko slammed her glass down on the counter. "That !#$%! I can't believe he's hanging all over her, and on television!" She'd show that rotten jerk! She'd track down some hunky guy and do something with him. She wasn't sure what, since there was no way she'd let a guy get farther than second base on a first date, but she'd think of something that was sure to make Ranma a fountain of jealousy. Maybe introduce the hunk as the father of her child or something.  
  
There was another cry of pain from the dance floor. Evidently Kasumi was having some luck. Kachiko rose from her bar stool, nearly falling over as the room swayed and the floor tried to dart out from under her, and made her way back to the daughter that was older than her. Wouldn't the guys get a kick out of that when she told them that story?  
  
Xxxxxxxx  
  
Soun heard the front door slam open as Ranma's voice reached his ears.  
  
"And I'm telling you there's no way I was hypnotized into acting like a monkey. I'd have remembered it."  
  
"But you were," Akane insisted.   
  
"Look, I can prove it. I've been around a monkey during that stupid martial arts tea ceremony thing. If I didn't act like a monkey then, I'm not going to do it because some guy with a stupid hat tells me to."  
  
"Let's just drop it," Akane said.  
  
Soun ran toward the front door, looking hopeful. Upon seeing it was only Ranma and Akane, he immediately became crestfallen again.  
  
Despite her depressed state, Akane picked up on her Father's anxiety. "What's wrong?"  
  
He wrung his hands nervously. "I found a note from Kasumi saying she went out dancing with Kachi."  
  
Ranma appeared mystified. "So what?"  
  
Anxiety overcame Akane, giving her an uncanny resemblance to her father. "Oh no! We have to find them. There's no telling what trouble Mom will get Kasumi into."  
  
Ranma turned to look in surprise at Akane's statement. "Come on. You're overreacting. Kachi's a big girl and knows what she's doing. She can handle any trouble that comes her way."  
  
"You always take her side!" Akane snapped.   
  
"What do you mean 'take her side'?"   
  
"You..." Akane trailed off as she saw the girl in question had suddenly appeared in the doorway, Kasumi humming merrily from her position draped across Kachiko's back. Akane caught a wiff of both women, and recoiled.   
  
"We're home!" Kachiko announced, mostly to the girl behind her.  
  
Kasumi stood unsteadily as Kachiko released her hold. She smiled even more blissfully than usual at everyone. "Hello." She added a wave to the greeting.  
  
Hands on her hips, Akane stood directly in front of Kachiko and said in low, threatening tones, "Just what did you do to my sister?"  
  
Kachiko sniffed disdainfully at the display. "Me and Kasumi were doing some mother and daughter bondage."  
  
Kachiko watched everyone's reaction to that.  
  
She shook her head clear of the cobwebs for a moment. "Bonding. I mean bonding. Not bondage. I'm not into that. I'd never do something like that. Except that one time with... but that's not important right now. But there's nothing wrong with experimenting. It's healthy. It shows you have an open mind." She noticed everyone's reaction again. "I think I'd better quit while I'm behind."  
  
While Kachiko tried figuring out where she had gone wrong, Kasumi had moved around her and Akane and walked up to Soun. She smiled and embraced him. "Good evening, Father."  
  
Soun caught the scent surrounding her and sobbed, "My daughter's dressed like a slut and stinking drunk! I've failed in my duty as a father!"  
  
Kasumi appeared put off, an almost unheard of condition for her. "I'll have you know I only had twelve or thirtyteen drinks this evening. I am barely feeling tipsy." She moved to Akane and hugged her as well.   
  
Uncertain of how to react, Akane just accepted the display of affection. As Kasumi moved away, Akane noticed her own clothing had taken on a somewhat alcoholic scent. She didn't know how much one had to drink to cause that, only that Kachiko was to blame for her sister's condition.  
  
"Good evening, Ranma." Kasumi moved to embrace him, then changed targets as she grabbed his head and forced his mouth to hers, kissing him.   
  
Ranma's pig-tail shot out from behind his head as he felt a tongue that wasn't his force its way past his lips.  
  
"Hey, hey, enough of that!" Kachiko shouted as Kasumi tried intertwining her body with Ranma's.  
  
It took the combined efforts of Kachiko and Akane to pry Kasumi away from him.  
  
Kasumi appeared satisfied at the results. "Kissing boys is fun. I'm going to do it lots more often now."  
  
Ranma's reaction was to stand statue still, his mind not quite able to process what just happened.   
  
Mood decidedly cooler toward the daughter she had done 'bondage' with, Kachiko took her by the shoulders and pointed her toward the interior of the house. "It's time for you to go to bed."  
  
Kasumi giggled. "Ranma should come with me, then." She tried to grab onto his shirt.  
  
Kachiko fended the hands away while continuing to push Kasumi toward the bedroom. "No, Ranma's going to be happy sleeping all by himself tonight. You need a good night's sleep as well."  
  
"Okay, Mother," Kasumi said dreamily. "We should do more mother and daughter bonding tomorrow."  
  
"Maybe the night after that instead. I'm feeling a touch on the woozy side myself," Kachiko reluctantly admitted. She called back, "Good night everyone. See you tomorrow."  
  
The trio remained motionless, looking at where the girls had departed in disbelief, as though it hadn't happened and the real Kachiko and Kasumi would appear any minute now.  
  
They remained there for some time.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kasumi awoke to the knowledge that she was dying. It was sad and tragic. She would have wondered how her family would deal with her loss, but it hurt too much to think. Instead she just lay there, waiting for death to visit and end her suffering.  
  
For some odd reason, she didn't die. She just lay limply on her bed as pain receptors in her brain insisted on dancing the rumba. It was really quite mean of them. Perhaps they were making up for lost time, since she hadn't engaged in any behavior, aside from nicking herself with a kitchen knife, that would have given them cause to become active.   
  
Kasumi waited until the receptors slowed down to a mellow waltz before dragging herself out of bed. As she rose, she noticed she was still dressed in the same clothing that her mother had insisted she wear the previous night. She fingered the clothing distastefully. It was so improper, not sleeping in an appropriate outfit. She was just glad no one was there to see her in such a sorry state.  
  
Kasumi dared to push herself up from the bed and stand up. As she did so, the receptors in her head started with a new dance. In wooden clogs, if she was any judge of it. She also became aware of a terrible taste, as though someone had dipped something dead in mucus and then stuffed it in her mouth. For the first time in her life, Kasumi was sorry she wasn't going to die. It would make things so much easier  
  
Deciding remaining motionless wasn't going to improve her condition, and she had already managed the arduous task of regaining a vertical base, Kasumi headed toward the bathroom. Within the medicine cabinet was aspirin, which would hopefully ease her suffering. If that didn't work, there were always knives in the kitchen that could be used to end the torment.  
  
No longer caring about her appearance, Kasumi headed to the bath in the clothes she was already wearing. As she made it to the bottom of the stairs, only missing a couple of steps on the way, she spotted Ranma already up as he exited the bathroom.  
  
"Morning, Ranma," was the best greeting Kasumi could manage in her current state.   
  
She noted with surprise (and annoyance, she was amazed to discover) that Ranma's reaction was not to greet her in return, as he usually did. Instead he put the wall to his back and slowly backed away, as though she was a dangerous foe he dared not take his eyes from. He remained that way until he was out of sight, then she heard the sound of footfalls hurrying away from her.  
  
That was peculiar. She hoped there was nothing terribly wrong with him. While he was uncouth and quite rude, he was a younger man, and that was to be expected. He lacked the calm bearing that older, more experienced men had. Though he was a decent kisser....  
  
Wait. Where had that thought come from? Perhaps she had dreamed of kissing him, which is why she would think such a bizarre thought. It was peculiar, though. She had never regarded Ranma as particularly desirable due to being so much younger than her. Though now that she thought about it, he did have a nice, tight bottom....  
  
There it was again! What was with these unusual thoughts regarding the young man who had been living under her roof all this time. Well, she knew what to do concerning such impure impulses. It was time for a very cold shower followed by a very cold bath. That would dispose of her unwanted ardor quickly enough, and she could return to normal.  
  
Kasumi walked into the bath and headed to where the stool and bucket were stored. She set them up, trying very hard not to think that Ranma had been in there early, naked, and that if she had risen ten minutes earlier and not thought about looking for the occupied sign, she might have stumbled upon him the way Akane had the first day he was here....  
  
"Cold water. I need cold water," Kasumi murmured to herself. Her impure impulses were much stronger and more frequent than usual. She had to take action fast. As she filled the bucket with cold water, she lamented the fact she hadn't found a good man, like her mother had at her age. Then she could do something about those naughty thoughts. While technically her mother hadn't found a man yet, she would. Eventually. And it would be Father. Probably.  
  
The splitting pain in Kasumi's skull increased. Pondering temporal mechanics under normal circumstances was bad enough; doing it in the middle of a hangover was impossible. Dance numbers started blending into one in a choreography that would have made Bob Fosse green with envy.  
  
Bucket filled, Kasumi began removing her clothes. As she peeled the far too tight shirt over her head, she found herself scarcely believing her mother had talked her into wearing such risqué clothing. It displayed her ample bust far too clearly for her taste. Dressing like that always made men stare, and she was uncomfortable with such things. The attention usually made taking cold showers a necessity often enough that her skin sometimes felt it permanently had goosebumps.   
  
Kasumi wondered what had happened last night. She didn't remember much after her mother handed her several glasses of alcohol, one right after another until they, and the events surrounding them, turned into a giant blur. She hoped they had done some wonderful emotional bonding, and that her mother would have a better time remembering them than her.  
  
It was as Kasumi removed her bra that she glanced in the mirror. Instantly, she froze, staring at the image. Slowly, her hand came up to her breast, trying to prove that the thing in it was false, or the result of some twisted magic, like the one that had produced Ranma's separate female counterpart. But no, the actions of the person in the mirror followed their originator's exactly.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
A scream pierced the tranquility of the house. In her room, Nabiki smothered her head under her pillow. Soun shot out of his bedroom in an instant, trying to locate the source of the disturbance. Kachiko ceased her search for more of the hair of the dog that bit her, and headed toward the bathroom. Ranma and Akane, who were already in the living room (an aura of tension coming from Akane and one of mystification around Ranma) became concerned as they too headed toward the scream.  
  
Ranma, Akane, and Kachiko arrived at the same time, followed closely by Soun.   
  
Seeing Kasumi in nothing but a pair of panties and a towel covering her bosom, Akane slapped her hands across Ranma's face an instant before he shut his eyes on his own.   
  
Thoughts of propriety overruled concern as Soun was the first to utter, "What's wrong, Kasumi?"  
  
Tearfully, she held the towel against her bosom with one hand while pointing at it, sobbing, "There's a thing there."  
  
"A thing?" Soun asked.  
  
Kasumi waved her free hand frantically. "You know, a thing."  
  
"A towel?" Kachiko offered.   
  
"Not that."  
  
"A zit?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"No."  
  
"A nipple? Breasts tend to come with those, you know."  
  
"No. I mean yes, but that's not what I mean."  
  
"Quit keeping me in suspense. What is it?" Kachiko asked in a tired voice.  
  
A single tear running down her face, Kasumi removed the towel.   
  
"Kasumi!" Akane gasped.  
  
"Daughter!" Soun said transfixed by what was there.  
  
"What? I think the birdy tattoo looks neat," Kachiko said. "You're making a big deal out of nothing."  
  
The casual dismissal of her concerns was too much for Kasumi to bear. For the first time in recent memory, she felt an anger consume her, one that she didn't even try to fight. Giving in to her impulse, she strode forward, moving so fast Kachiko didn't have time to react as Kasumi raised her hand and slapped her mother across the cheek with an open palm, hard enough to turn her face away from her daughter.  
  
Kachiko remained motionless, holding her rapidly reddening cheek. Soun and Akane drew back. Ranma tensed at the sound of the slap, but decided it would be better to keep his eyes shut and hope for the best.  
  
"I can't believe you did this to me!" Kasumi raged, her voice cracking as it was forced into a higher pitch than it had been in years. "You're an evil, irresponsible person! You're not my mother! My mother was nice and wonderful and the best person in the world, and you're nothing like her! You're just a selfish brat that's only concerned for what she wants and doesn't care about anyone around you! I hate you I hate you I hate you!!!"  
  
As the last word left her lips, Kasumi seemed to realize what she said, and who they were directed to. Suddenly, the agony in her skull was dwarfed by the pain of comprehension of what she had just done. Horror filled her, and she wished with all her might she could take back what she said.   
  
Sobbing worse than ever, she pleaded, "I'm sorry, Mother. I spoke out of turn. Please forgive me." Any punishment Kachiko leveled against her wouldn't make up for the terrible things Kasumi said about her. Just so long as her mother wasn't angry with her and reject her. That was something she couldn't bear.  
  
Kachiko's look of disbelief at the litany of anger directed toward her vanished. Instead, she began snickering slightly. "You know, this is the first time since I've met you that I can honestly believe you might be a kid of mine." She patted Kasumi affectionately on the shoulder. "You're actually an all right girl. You just need to let it out a little more often. You'll be happier for it." Kachiko headed for the door.  
  
Amazed at the lack of reaction from Kachiko, everyone simply stared at her, Kasumi the most shocked of them all. She was so certain her mother would have punished her endlessly for such disrespect, as she had other times since her return. Instead, she had condoned the behavior. Why? Why had she openly endorsed such a terrible and inappropriate thing?  
  
Just as she was about to leave, Kachiko looked over her shoulder and said, "Oh, by the way, about the little mark on your breast. For your information, I didn't come up with the idea of getting the matching tattoos. You're the one that suggested it. You thought it'd be a neat thing for a mother and daughter to have." And with that she left the room.  
  
All strength left Kasumi's body as she sank to her knees. With that revelation, some of the haze over her memories parted, and she remembered her behavior from the previous night. She had acted inappropriately, and not like a proper girl at all. She had drunk herself into a stupor and behaved scandalously with men. Many men. She even remembered the inspiration and talking a reluctant Kachiko into getting tattoos for themselves. It all came back to her in a rush, sending her mind reeling as she processed all the new information.   
  
With the return of Kasumi's memories, one important fact came to the forefront, one that made the others that should have troubled her seem insignificant. Going out had been fun. More fun than she had experienced in years. She had worn a smile on her face for so long that her cheeks still felt tired from the overuse of her facial muscles. She had forgotten how enjoyable it was interacting with men, something she hadn't done since high school, when she had gotten more than her share of attention. Dancing had left her breathless and made more muscles ache, but in a good way. Even the drinking had produced a fairly pleasing effect, allowing her to cast aside her usual inhibitions and enjoy herself to the fullest without regard as to what others would think of her (though judging by the painful aftermath, she could live with a little less pleasure if it meant a little less pain).  
  
Kasumi looked down again at the tattoo adorning her breast, as thought seeing it in a different light. It was small, and low enough that no one would know it was there, save under the most intimate of conditions or in a public bath. It really was very beautiful work, with details so intricate she could actually see the feathers. She had always liked blue jays, and having one pictured on her flesh, even there, wasn't very terrible in and of itself. While she would not want any others on her body, there wasn't anything truly bad with having a small one in such an out of the way place. And if others found its presence scandalous, well, perhaps they should mind their own business and not worry about how other people appeared to them.  
  
There was one other important factor about the tattoo which assuaged her concerns. After the first couple of weeks since her mother's return, Kasumi had felt left out when compared to her sisters. Kachiko enjoyed matching wits with Nabiki, and she had an interest in martial arts similar to Akane (as well as an interest in Ranma), but there had been no common ground between Kasumi and her mother. All attempts at taking care of hearth and home were met with stiff resistance, and the few times when Kachiko relented and did so, it was done out of necessity rather than enjoyment. However, thanks to the tattoos, she now had something in common with her mother. It made Kasumi feel a touch of pride and joy at the knowledge that there was now an experience that was shared exclusively between the two of them.  
  
Mood considerably brighter, Kasumi excused the others as she began removing her clothing once again and prepared to clean herself off, humming pleasantly as she stared at the new addition to her breast. Maybe it was good to be alive after all.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
[END NOTES] Yes, the hypnotist uses the same dialogue as the Ghost Clown from the 'Foul Play in Funland' episode. What can I say? It was a classic line. ^_^]  
  
Special thanks to:  
  
Fido for the 'mother and daughter bondage line  
  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
  
Michael Chase  
  
Chris Horton  
  
The Apprentice  
  
David Tai  
  
Elistran 


	16. The Things We Chapter 13

The Things We Wish For...  
  
Chapter 12  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/d_b_sommer/index.html  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing fics, at   
  
http://www.hostultra.com/~AngCobraFics/dbsommer.html  
  
At fanfiction.net:  
  
http://www.fanfiction.net/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
  
http://www.fanworks.org  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen.  
  
Revision date: 2/9/04  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma stared across the expanse of dojo floor at his opponent, who was tensed and ready for action. It was what he wanted. What he needed. After much cajoling, bargaining, and borderline pleading, he had finally gotten his way and forced Kachiko into sparring with him one more time. More importantly, he convinced his cagey opponent into relenting on her 'one mandatory date to fight' stance.  
  
"Remember, I don't have to date you if I win," Ranma said in case she tried to change the terms of the agreement or claim they were something other than what had been decided upon before the contest began.  
  
"And if you lose, I get to go out with you three times." Kachiko adjusted her plain white gi once more. There was a spring in her step as she prepared for action.  
  
Ranma watched the tricky girl carefully. The prospect of having to date her three times would have made him sick to his stomach, if it wasn't for the fact there was no way he would lose to her this time. He was ready for anything. He had taken the measure of her fighting prowess. Even if there was some trick move left in her repertoire, it couldn't overcome his advantage.  
  
"Don't hold back, Ranma!" Akane, the only other occupant in the dojo, called out.   
  
Like that would happen, Ranma thought to himself. While he was taking Kachiko seriously, he was still handcuffed by being unable to strike her. He was uncomfortable with the idea of punching her out, and then there was the fact he'd be tossed out on his rear end by the rest of the Tendous (other than Akane, evidently) if he hurt Kachiko in any way. The handicap would make things competitive, but there was no doubt that with his ability to evade any attack from her, his own impressive inventory of grappling techniques, combined with superior strength, that he would come out on top. There was nothing she could do to stop him.  
  
"Are you ready?" Ranma asked.  
  
Kachiko closed her eyes and pointed her face up toward the ceiling. She remained that way, motionless and silent.  
  
"Well?" Ranma asked impatiently.  
  
Kachiko held a single finger up, indicating silence from Ranma as well. He scowled, impatient at the delay. No doubt she was trying to get him off his game by making him wait. She could stall all she wanted; it would do no good.  
  
A full minute passed, then two. Silence dominated things so thoroughly that Ranma heard a door slam from the house next to the dojo.   
  
Kachiko turned back to Ranma and opened her eyes. She shifted into a combat stance. "Ready."  
  
Ranma smirked. He'd have her pinned to the ground in under five minutes.  
  
For the third time in three sparring matches between the two, he moved first, intent on ending things quickly.  
  
In response, Kachiko fell to her knees, ripped open her gi so that it fell off her shoulders, barely covering the upper half of her breasts, and screamed at the top of her lungs.  
  
Ranma leaped back for a second at the unexpected action, though he remained ready to counter anything she might follow up with. Instead she remained on the ground, sniffling as a cascade of tears flowed down her face.  
  
Ranma felt pity toward her if she thought anything that blatant was going to work. "Forget it. I ain't falling for whatever you have plann-"  
  
The rest was cut off as the door to the dojo flew open and Soun entered. Panic-stricken, he shouted, "What's going on?! I heard Kachi scream!" He took in the sight before him and began trembling in rage.  
  
Kachiko pointed weakly at Ranma, barely managing through sobs, "Ruh, Ranma. He tried to... me," she broke down and began outright bawling.  
  
"But I didn't-" was the only defense Ranma could muster. It was in vain as a Demon Head attack, five times worse than any unleashed at him before, rendered him insensate with terror.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko looked up through her tears and winced as Soun began slamming the inert Ranma's head into the dojo floor repeatedly, unleashing a litany of foul language that made even Kachiko blanch.  
  
"There's no way you can say you won," Akane said bitterly.  
  
Kachiko stuck her tongue out as she adjusted her gi so that it covered her body again. "You're right, but it doesn't matter. I didn't have to win. Ranma just had to lose. I'd say that qualifies." She pointed at the onslaught taking place at the far side of the dojo.  
  
Akane simmered in rage. "I can't believe you're low enough to come up with a plan using Dad to do your dirty work."  
  
Nabiki entered the dojo, surveying the scene. She strolled nonchalantly toward Kachiko and held out her hand. "I told you it would work. Now cough up the cash."  
  
Kachiko pulled a small wad of bills from inside her gi and handed it to Nabiki.   
  
Akane stared at her sister, aghast. "How could you sell out Ranma like that?"  
  
Nabiki stared at her curiously, as though not quite grasping the question. "Kachi asked me to do a favor for her. I could hardly pick Ranma over my own dear, sweet mother, now could I?"  
  
"Oh, if it was a favor, then you'll give back the money?" Kachiko asked with her hand held out.  
  
"Not a chance." Nabiki waved the bills back and forth. "This makes us even after the bad run of luck I had playing cards with you."  
  
"Want to play some more to get back at me and come out ahead?" Kachiko asked.   
  
Nabiki begged off. "I think not. Unlike Ranma, I am fully willing to admit when I'm outclassed in something. We'll come up with some other recreational activity to wager on. In the meantime, you'd better calm Daddy down or there won't be enough left of Ranma to take out."  
  
"Oops." Kachiko rushed over to calm Soun down.   
  
Nabiki began counting the bills. She had only gotten to five thousand yen when they were smacked out of her hand and into the air. They began fluttering down like a paper snowfall.  
  
The sisters matched each other with their equally cold stares.  
  
"How dare you side with her," Akane hissed.  
  
"Don't get high and mighty with me, Little Sister," Nabiki spat. "She's family, no matter how hard you try to deny it. And it just so happens we have something in common, which is more than you or I have, so don't make it sound like I owe you something, or am betraying you when doing it to her would be no different." She bent down and began gathering the bills.  
  
"Ranma's my fiancé!" Akane snapped.   
  
"On the contrary, Ranma's engagement is on hiatus, with his eager consent." Nabiki smirked at her sister. "Besides, Ranma wasn't going to let the rematch thing go anymore than Mom is going to give up on him without dating him once. They have to get this out of their system before things can return to any semblance of normality."  
  
"Don't make it sound like you're doing this for their own good. You did it for the money, like the greedy witch you've always been."  
  
"My needs happened to coincide with the best course of action for all involved," Nabiki said icily as she finished gathering the money. She wasted no time in heading out, but before she exited the dojo, she turned around one last time. "Besides, you're the one that wished for all of this."   
  
Nabiki had exited by the time Akane muttered under her breath, "No, this wasn't what I wished for. Not at all."  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko was lounging around on her bed, reading a book, when the door to her room burst open. Startled, she turned to confront the intruder. "The old geezer better have broken both your hands and that was the reason you didn't knock."  
  
"I didn't lose!" Ranma declared.   
  
"Don't try to back out of the deal now," Kachiko warned. "I didn't have to win. You just had to lose, and you did. I get three dates out of you."  
  
"The fight wasn't over," Ranma insisted.  
  
"Of course it was. I had to keep the creepy old guy from bouncing your skull around as a basketball."  
  
"I wasn't unconscious."  
  
"You were lying there, completely motionless."  
  
"Paralyzed by his demon head attack is not the same thing as being beaten. It just meant I could have been easily defeated. But you didn't defeat me. You just let me lay there until I recovered," Ranma said satisfactorily.  
  
"That's a defeat."  
  
"No, it isn't. It's an oversight on your part. It's what happens when you get cocky."  
  
"Like you're one to talk! And you did lose!"  
  
"Did not!"  
  
"Did!"  
  
"Did not!"  
  
"Did!"  
  
The two exchanged the accusations back and forth for the better part of fifteen minutes. Their voices were hoarse by the time Ranma held his hand up for a truce.  
  
"What?" Kachiko said, voice cracking from the unrelenting strain placed on her vocal cords.  
  
Ranma's voice was equally rasping. "Look, we both have our points of view, and maybe we're both right and wrong."  
  
Kachiko wanted to argue but her voice was too strained from the argument. "Compromise?"  
  
"Might be for the best."  
  
"You go out on two dates with me then."  
  
Ranma shook his head. "One date. And you have to give me something in return."  
  
Kachiko appeared ready to argue the point, then seemed to reconsider. "What is it you want?"  
  
Ranma told her.  
  
Kachiko rolled her eyes. "And you'll agree to go out on a date with me without trying to worm your way out of it?"  
  
With a great deal of reluctance, Ranma forced his mouth to say, "Yes."  
  
"And it has to be my definition of a date, not yours. And you have to sincerely try to have a good time instead of acting like a jerk and trying to make me end it early."  
  
The strain became more evident, but Ranma managed a "Fine, but you can't try to make me do anything perverted with you."  
  
Kachiko shot him a cold look. "This is our first date. Let me assure you when it comes to me, no one makes it past first base with their initial at-bat, if that."   
  
"And you can't make me go out on another date if something happens to mess it up, since that happens to me all the time."  
  
"As long as you aren't the one getting others to mess it up for you," Kachiko warned. "Besides, you're jumping to conclusions. You might be so bad at dating I won't want to go out with you a second time."  
  
The accusation offended Ranma to very core of his being. "Don't be stupid. I'm a great guy to go out with. Why do you think I have so many girls after me all the time?"  
  
Kachiko crossed her arms defiantly. "I am not like other girls. I have higher standards. And I have lots of other guys interested in me, like Tachi-kun, who currently has the inside line on you since he goes out of his way to treat me nice."  
  
"I'm a way better guy than that jerk, Kunou," Ranma swore.  
  
"You do have some intangible quality that makes you interesting. If you turned on some actual charm to go with it, you might pull ahead," Kachiko conceded.   
  
Ranma was in full competitive mode. "I will pull ahead of him. You just watch. I'll take you on best date you've ever been on."  
  
"Set realistic goals. Just make it one I'll enjoy and I'll be satisfied," Kachiko said.   
  
"You just wait. I'll impress you so much, you'll forget any other guy exists," Ranma promised as he exited the room.  
  
Once Ranma was out of earshot, Kachiko said to herself, "Now, he's making me uneasy." She wondered how to go about ensuring Ranma didn't mess things up by going overboard.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma hummed an upbeat tune as he headed toward his room. "Kachi's going to have the time of her life. I'll show her. I'll show them all. Ranma Saotome knows how to date the ladies."  
  
Kasumi, who had been standing in the hall, overheard Ranma's vow. A troubled expression crossed her brow. "Oh dear. I'd better tell Father about this." Thought was the same as motion. It only took a minute to locate her father, who was with Genma, playing a game of shogi on the back porch.  
  
"Father, I have terrible news," Kasumi said.  
  
"You've been out carousing again, dressing like a tramp and drinking like a lush!" Soun wailed.   
  
A vexed expression crossed Kasumi's features. "No, that's not it at all. Ranma is going out on a date with Mother."  
  
Soun's fist struck the table, making it bounce. "And after he already tried to molest my darling wife once today! This time I'll kill him!"  
  
Genma cleared his throat. "Ah, didn't Kachi explain it as a big joke and Ranma hadn't laid a finger on her, and that if you were to attack the boy again, she'd never forgive you?"  
  
Soun calmed down. "Oh, right. I forgot about that."  
  
"But you can't just let Ranma date Mother," Kasumi insisted.  
  
Genma nodded in agreement. "You need to be a man with that girl and tell it to her like it is."  
  
"Do you think so?" Soun asked the duo.  
  
"Mother wants to be loved by you, I'm certain."  
  
"Women like a take charge kind of guy," Genma concurred. "In fact, if it was me, and Nodoka was behaving that way, I'd kick down the girl's door and demand she go out with me."  
  
Soun considered the statements. There was some wisdom in them.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
The noise from the others caught someone else's attention. Right outside the kitchen, Akane wasn't able to make out the words and was left wondering what the commotion coming from the back porch was about. Before she had a chance to investigate, she heard a knock from the front door.  
  
Akane answered it, and was surprised to find an adult Miss Hinako standing there. She wore one of her more mundane yellow 'school dresses', one that could handle her size changing and look acceptable in either of her forms. Or almost acceptable, as a good bit of leg was showing in her current state.  
  
"Hello, Miss Hinako," Akane said.  
  
"Greetings, Miss Tendou. I am here to see that awful, scrawny, delinquent tramp and put her in her place."  
  
Even a week ago, Akane would have attempted to dissuade the woman from starting a fight, especially in the house, but after the events of the afternoon, there was really no choice at all. "She's in her bedroom. Go upstairs, second room on the right. Let yourself in, and don't hold back."   
  
"Thank you." Hinako eagerly rushed into the house, following Akane's directions.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
With Ranma gone and with her date assured, Kachiko allowed herself to relax and return to reading her book. She was just getting to a good part, when the door to her room was thrown upon once again.  
  
"Did knocking suddenly become a lost art?!" Kachiko threw the book aside and stood up to confront the intruder: Hinako. "Oh, it's you. Well, I can see why someone like you would get confused and mistake 'knockers' as being the same thing as 'knocking'. I have yet to meet someone with a huge chest whose IQ exceeded her bust size."  
  
Hinako cleared her throat and began speaking in a lecturing tone. "I was going to engage in a civil discussion with you regarding the impropriety of your behavior and the wisdom in annulling your marriage to Soun-chan, but rather than waste the oxygen, I think I'll cut to the inevitable conclusion of the debate."  
  
"The part where I tell you to kiss my ass?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"And then I drain you." Hinako held up her coin.   
  
Kachiko tried to evade the attack by fleeing out her open window. She had just cleared the window's ledge when the Happo-gojuuen Setsu struck her, withering her form as the chi was sucked out of her body. Now much lighter, Kachiko floated down to the ground as light as a feather.  
  
Hinako remained in the room, admiring her handiwork, when Soun barged in and shouted, "I have had enough of this running around! I demand that you go out with me tonight!" Declaration made, Soun finally took a moment to focus upon whom he was speaking to. His jaw nearly hit the floor.   
  
Hinako bounded over to the man and embraced him, rubbing her body against him in a very familiar way. "Oh, Soun-chan, I can't believe you've actually asked me out. You've made me the happiest woman in the world. Of course I accept."  
  
Soun was unable to manage the difficult task of moving, and remained unresisting in her grasp, babbling incoherently.   
  
Hidden around the corner, Kasumi and Genma, who had followed Soun up the stairs, shook their heads sadly.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ensconced in a secret chamber located in a warehouse along the docks of Tokyo Bay, a clandestine meeting was taking place. The warehouse was dank and held hint of danger, as though it was a locale where many an illicit gathering birthed foul plans. Currently it was filled with over three dozen people, milling about the room as individuals and in large clusters. A buffet sat in the center, brightly lit and offering a wide variety of food.  
  
One corner of the building was dominated by a number of rough-looking women, all of them healthy specimens of womanhood. Many of them were on the beefy side, though their mass was composed of solid muscle. They were dressed in a variety of high school uniforms, the majority of outfits altered in such a way as to give them a seedy appearance. Most of the women were smoking, drinking from small flasks, or otherwise radiated an aura of toughness and a desire to be left to their own devices.   
  
A second group, larger than the women, stationed themselves near the main garage door to the warehouse. All of them were men, just as rough-looking and physically fit as the women. To a man they sat astride an assortment of motorcycles bearing distinctive red and black striped flags, with a skull in the center of the field, hanging from the bikes. Occasionally one of the men would gun his engine, the reverberations echoing through the enclosed area and drowning out the ability to think.  
  
An older man with gray hair and a worn face that showed years of a hard life, sat by himself. He was dressed in green coveralls and held a mop affectionately in his hands as he glared beneath his worn cap.  
  
A rail-thin, nerdy-looking man wearing glasses that reflected the light so totally that his eyes were obscured behind the glare --despite the low lighting-- sat by himself, typing away on an open lap top.  
  
To the left, one of the shadows moved independently of the dim lighting in the warehouse.   
  
A group of bizarrely shaped creatures, most of them seeming to resemble demonic household appliances, kept to themselves toward the back of the chamber.  
  
An inconspicuous man dressed in a business suit helped himself to the buffet.   
  
As the various groups spoke among themselves, a spotlight suddenly shined upon the floor in the center of the warehouse. A rumbling erupted from below, and a portion of the floor retracted. From the opening, a dais emerged with a solitary figure perched on an elaborate throne in the center. He wore flowing red robes adorned with arcane symbols along a yellow border. A plain steel mask with black eye slits and a hole for a mouth covered the face, hiding the identity of the newcomer. The hood of the figure rose above his head, nearly two feet in height, and ended in a tapered point.   
  
The figure spoke, in quiet lethal tones, "I have gathered-"   
  
"I can't hear you!" one of the bikers toward the back shouted.  
  
The strange figure stopped, letting out a sigh of frustration. He flipped up a compartment on the arm of his chair, revealing a panel with a number of buttons and switches on it. Muttering to himself, he flicked one of the switches.  
  
The dais began to descend.   
  
"Shit! That's not it!" The figure flipped the switch so that the dais rose again. Once at its former position, he set the switch back in its original position. He then pushed a green button.  
  
The air was suddenly filled with loud feedback, making everyone cover their ears and howl in pain. The figure adjusted a dial, and the feedback stopped. Once everyone's hearing recovered, the figure spoke again, this time his voice reverberating throughout the warehouse. "Can you hear me now?"  
  
The biker in the back nodded.   
  
The figure cleared his throat again. "I have summoned all of you here today for a purpose."  
  
One of the women asked, "Who are you, anyway?"  
  
The figure posed menacingly before the gathering. "My real name is unimportant. You may address me as... the Gargoyle!"   
  
"You don't look a thing like a gargoyle," one of the demonic appliances pointed out.  
  
"It's an alias," the Gargoyle answered.  
  
"You look like a giant conehead," one of the bikers said.   
  
"It's just a disguise."  
  
"It looks silly," the small man with the laptop said.   
  
"I'll have you know it's based on the style of one of the most dangerous criminal organizations of the nineteenth century."   
  
"They didn't make many public appearances, did they?" one of the women asked.  
  
"Well, no," the Gargoyle reluctantly admitted.   
  
The woman continued. "There might be a reason for that. Besides, there's a reason people don't wear fashions that are two centuries out of date."  
  
"Just bear with me!" The Gargoyle demanded. "We have not gathered here to comment on my choice of raiment. Rather we are here because of a common past we share."  
  
"Daddy?" one of the creatures asked, hope filling its voice.  
  
"Not that sort of shared past," the Gargoyle said coldly. "It is that of a common foe. You see, all of us have the distinction of being wronged in our youth. During a time when we needed a helping hand to assist us in understanding our needs and problems, we were instead ignored, then harassed and physically abused under the guise of 'discipline'. Our behavior, which was nothing more than our attempt to reach out and find our niche in the world, was labeled 'delinquency' and our individuality crushed by a foul witch that derives perverse enjoyment in squashing those that don't fit in her narrow-minded view of the world."  
  
One of the bikers scratched his head. "That's funny. All I remember doing when I was a kid was kicking the shit out of guys that I found annoying."  
  
The Gargoyle said, "That's a sign of the system that's brainwashed you into thinking yourself the perpetrator of wrongdoing when you are in fact the victim, If you were not a casualty of society's callousness and disregard for your well-being, when instead it should have been nurturing the soul within you, you would never have engaged in such behaviors in the first place. Obviously you are blameless for your actions."  
  
The biker's eyes goggled. "Wow! I never thought of it that way. Now my conscience, what little of it remains, feels a lot less guilty."  
  
"It is the system that is guilty, a system of oppression personified in this person!" The Gargoyle flipped another switch, activating a slide projector. On the far side of the room, an image of a woman appeared.  
  
"Britney Spears?" the man with the lap top asked.  
  
The Gargoyle began pounding the panel. "Goddamn piece of crap rental! Why don't they put symbols to indicate which button is which?" He flicked the button several times, going through the various slides, until the desired image appeared.  
  
A growl of recognition emanated from some of the people in the warehouse.  
  
"That's right, Hinako Ninomiya." Satisfaction filled the Gargoyle's voice. "That is why I have gathered you all together today, to seek vengeance upon this woman who wrecked all-"  
  
"Ahem! Excuse me!" An odd creature, one with the form of a toaster with legs, spoke up, attracting the Gargoyle's attention.  
  
"What?" he asked irritably.  
  
"Is that one of the Sailor Senshi in their true form?"  
  
"Of course not. That's a high school disciplinarian."  
  
"Isn't this the 'Youmas Against Mass Murdering Sailor Senshi' meeting?"  
  
"No, this is the 'Miss Hinako Revenge Squad' meeting."  
  
The youma flicked one of his buttons. From the slot on the top of his head, a sheaf of papers sprang out, just like a piece of toast would. The paper was lightly done, and crinkled as the youma unfurled it. "This is Warehouse Secret Lair #255, Dockside District, correct?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Then this should be the Youmas Against Mass Murdering Sailor Senshi meeting."  
  
The Gargoyle pulled out a paper of his own from within the confines of his robe. "Impossible. Here is my rental contract. We have full use of the facility until 8:50. I even paid the extra fifteen thousand yen for the buffet option."  
  
The youma reread his paper. "Oh, I'm sorry. The meeting isn't until 9:00. I really must read the fine print more carefully." The toaster youma bowed as he and his comrades exited the warehouse.   
  
The Gargoyle muttered a string of expletives under his breath. "Now, as I was saying, Miss Hinako has wronged each of us in some way." He pointed at the pack of girls, specifically at one of the more attractive members whose long black hair was done up in a ponytail. She looked bored as she played with a yo-yo that dangled from one of her fingers. "Miss Keiko Hayabusa, you organized a band of fellow girls and formed the 'Crimson Yo-Yo's, a bunch of sukeban that rightfully earned the respect and admiration of their peers at Shotokan Reform School. However, the powers that be feared an organization that encouraged women to be strong and independent minded, preferring you to act like submissive sheep. When you refused to cave in to their craven demands, they called in Miss Hinako, and with her energy draining abilities, broke up your gang and the influence you had over your so called higher learning institution."  
  
Keiko spat out her cigarette. "Yeah, that bitch drained us every day for a month until we were too tired to fight against all of them jerks in the school that had a grudge against us. Even the Astronomy Club kicked our asses. We had to break up the gang, or we would never have had a moment's peace. I'd love to get my hands on that bitch and break her in half." She hurled the yo-yo at a vacant chair. The round part of the toy struck the chair, shattering the wood and turning it into kindling. The yo-yo coiled back into the palm of her hand where she effortlessly caught it. Once again she let it move up and down as though it was no more dangerous than a child's toy.  
  
The Gargoyle pointed to the figure at the head of the biker gang. He was a huge man, towering over six and a half feet in height. He wore an open leather jacket that was little more than a vest with the sleeves torn away, revealing massive biceps and a set of abdominals and pectorals that would have turned a professional body builder green with envy. His face was shrouded in a hockey mask, though a shock of blond hair stuck out from the back.   
  
The Gargoyle spoke again. "You are the man known as the Road Ronin. You and your Biking Club's so-called offense was nothing more than engaging in a series of extracurricular activities."  
  
"We beat up the teachers, extorted money from the other students, sold drugs, opened a prostitution ring that specialized in high school girls, and ran a fansub bootleg cartel. We were the envy of every other biker gang in Japan," Road Ronin boasted.   
  
"Yes, and for these paltry things, Miss Hinako was once again set upon poor, victimized students when all you needed was encouragement to seek other means of releasing your anger."  
  
"Actually, I wasn't angry. I was greedy, self-centered, and sociopathic."  
  
"In other words, a typical teenager," the Gargoyle said.  
  
"Pretty much," the Road Ronin agreed.   
  
"And for the crime of being a teenager, you were drained repeatedly until you repented your acts and were expelled from school. Don't you see the injustice in it? Doesn't it make your heart long for revenge?"  
  
The Road Ronin shrugged. "Sure, why not?"  
  
"And you Kyosuke Takiawa!" the Gargoyle pointed to the shadows. "You were a ninja cadet of unparalleled skill. A shadow among shadows. You already knew what you wanted to be when it came to entering the job market, and isn't school meant to train us to enter society by becoming a productive member of it? You were destined for a greatness that few could know. But then it was all cut short by our common foe when she caught you sneaking into the principal's office late at night, trying to alter your grades."  
  
A figure dressed in the familiar black garb of a ninja emerged from the shadows. "I should have had a higher grade. It wasn't my fault that when they took attendance the teachers didn't see me."  
  
"And you met the same fate as the others. So tragic. So sad." the Gargoyle turned to the old man cradling his mop. "And you Tatsumi Kimura, were a simple downtrodden janitor-"  
  
"Waste management technician," the man growled.   
  
"Waste management technician," the Gargoyle corrected. "You, who do the necessary, if unsightly, work that others won't do, despite the fact it needs to be done. You, who are the true backbone of society, were also wronged by Hinako when that callous bitch punished you for just trying to make ends meet."  
  
The janitor's voice was full of a bitterness that could never be mopped up no matter how hard he tried. "I was minding my own business, selling textbooks on the black market from the basement of the school I was employed at for a little side cash. I kept everyone away pretending the school was haunted by the spirit of a Zimbabwean witch doctor. And I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for those nosy kids and their interfering mutt."  
  
The Gargoyle cleared his throat and pointed meaningfully at the slide of Hinako.  
  
"Oh, right, and if it wasn't for that energy draining bitch, too," the janitor added.  
  
"And like us, you desire revenge," the Gargoyle said.  
  
The man nodded, stroking his mop affectionately.  
  
One of the bikers looked incredulously at the older man. "Get real, you're just a lousy janitor. What can you do?"  
  
In a flash, the man closed the distance between the two, mop held like a lethal weapon. He thrust forward with it, jamming the entire head of the mop into the biker's mouth. He then spun around, the biker still attached to the mop, and jammed him into the floor, rubbing him vigorously back and forth before throwing him clear of the mop with a flick of the wrist. The biker's body collided with his motorcycle, knocking it over and leaving him lying in a motionless heap.  
  
The janitor pet his mop affectionately. "Me and Clementine can take on a dozen snot-nosed punks like you and wipe the floor with them. But then I'd have to go over it again since snot-nosed punks aren't good for cleaning the floor. They always leave streaks behind. And that's 'Waste Management Technician' to you."  
  
The Gargoyle turned away from the men, and pointed to the man with the lap top. "And you, Fujiki Genzo, a student with a mind like a steel trap. A computer programmer born before his time. More interested in code and consoles rather than the more esoteric classes, you were given low marks in those classes that held little interest for you. When you tried to hack into the system to alter those grades, Hinako discovered you, draining you dry, and taking away your computer, making you do all of your classes with nothing more complex than a pencil and a slide rule. Can any act be more cruel than to take away from you your precious lap top? Don't you long for revenge against she who wronged you so terribly?"  
  
The man adjusted his glasses, allowing the light to glimmer off them maniacally. "Get real. That was back in high school. Since then, I went to a prestigious college, graduated with top honors, and founded my own successful computer company. I have nearly a billion yen, several houses around the world, and one of the most beautiful trophy wives money can buy."  
  
"But what about your all-consuming lust for revenge?" the Gargoyle stammered out.  
  
"Oh please. That happened years ago. It wasn't that big a deal then, and I'm certainly over it now. I can't believe none of you losers aren't also."  
  
"Over it?! You demented sicko! Get the hell out of here!" the Gargoyle raged, pointing to the door to the warehouse.  
  
Genzo closed the laptop and departed.  
  
"Some people have no comprehension of how they've been wronged," the Gargoyle muttered. He pointed to the ordinary looking man standing next to the buffet, helping himself to another plate of General Tso's Chicken. "And you, you poor, poor man, who were... say, who are you anyway?"  
  
"Chuck." The man waved a piece of chicken at the coneheaded leader.  
  
"Chuck...?"  
  
"Just Chuck."  
  
"Ah yes, Chuck. Chuck, whom Hinako... Hinako.... Umm, what did Miss Hinako do to you anyway?"  
  
Chuck shrugged. "Nothing. I've never met her before in my life." He bit into the chicken piece.  
  
"Then what are you doing here?"  
  
Chuck spoke through a mouth full of food. "I heard there was an open buffet and dropped by. But hey, if it's a revenge thing, go ahead and count me in. I'm always up for revenge, even if its against people I've never met."  
  
The Gargoyle considered it. "What is it you do?"  
  
"I'm a lawyer," Chuck beamed.   
  
The Gargoyle recoiled. "Look, I might be willing to allow thieves, thugs, pushers, pimps, prostitutes, janitors-"  
  
"Waste management technician."  
  
"--Waste management technicians, and even a ninja or two to join my squad, but there's no way I'm allowing a lawyer in the group. It's not like Miss Hinako did anything bad enough to merit that."  
  
The lawyer's features seemed to change, as though he was a shark that had been swimming peacefully until someone dropped five hundred pounds of fish guts on top of him. He stared hungrily at the Gargoyle. "Why, that sounds like a discrimination lawsuit to me."  
  
Before the lawyer could turn on him, the Gargoyle grabbed a nearby rope pull cord that conveniently dangled within his reach. In response, a trap door gave way beneath the lawyer, dropping him out of sight. A cry of, "I objecttttttt," drifted off into the distance.  
  
Everyone in the room breathed a sigh of relief.  
  
"Thank god I added the 'trapdoor with adjoining tank filled with man-eating piranha at the bottom' option at the last minute," the Gargoyle said.  
  
"I bet you don't have an exotic animals permit for these!" a voice in the distance shouted out. Cries of pain were hot in the heels of it.   
  
The Gargoyle tried wiping at the sweat that had formed at his brow, however his mask prevented him from doing it. No matter how he tried, he couldn't wipe it away. "Damn thing's stuffy. Next time I get an in-built power supply, cooling device, and a removable faceplate."  
  
"What did Miss Hinako do to you?" Keiko asked.   
  
"That is a secret. Suffice to say, it was ten times worse than anything she did to you. Now, I have gathered you all here for a purpose. It is my intention that Miss Hinako's punishment for a lifetime of wrongdoing is long overdue. Individually, we are all formidable opponents she barely defeated. With our power and resources combined, we are nigh unbeatable."  
  
"Only nigh unbeatable?" the Road Ronin asked.  
  
"Yes. We could be beaten, but not by very many people. Therefore we only qualify as nigh unbeatable, not absolutely unbeatable. But it's all right, because we are unbeatable when it comes to seeking revenge on Hinako, and that's all that matters."  
  
"What if she has friends that'll come to her defense?" Keiko asked, her yo-yo a blur as she swung it back and forth in eagerness.  
  
The Gargoyle laughed. "I've had her under surveillance for some time. Due to her job, as well as her freakish nature, she has no friends, loved ones, or even confidants. She's a solitary individual that will be easy prey for our combined talents. She might be able to deal with one or two of us, but not all of us. Now let us laugh evilly together everyone. And do it with real emotion."   
  
The warehouse reverberated from the cacophony of sinister laughter.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Why were the gods so cruel?   
  
Soun stared at the image in the mirror, a sight so depressing it would have laid even a lottery winner's euphoric high low. He couldn't believe his misfortune, and he had more than a passing experience with runs of bad luck. There were times when he felt his entire life was nothing but one unlucky experience after another. Once again what should have been a joyous occasion had instead turned into one of ruin and desolation.   
  
It wasn't fair! He had taken a stand. He had demanded Kachiko go out with him. Seeing his forceful, manly nature, she should have melted in his arms and accepted his invitation. After she had a wonderful time with him (like she had in his past) she would accept more dates. After a three month courtship, they would have sex, and then she would make him propose to her, exactly like last time. It was all a matter of taking that first step, her going out on a date with him, that needed to be taken. Once she got to know his inner self, which had not changed as his exterior had over the years, it would grow rapidly from there, the two would fall in love, and all would be right with the world.   
  
But his plan had backfired as horribly as possible. Akane's teacher had somehow been substituted for Kachiko, and ended up the recipient of his demand. Worse, she had accepted it with a wholehearted enthusiasm that no woman had ever showered upon him, not even Kachiko in the early days of their courtship. He couldn't honorably back out. He had to date Hinako at least once. Which was why Soun found himself staring mournfully at the mirror as he prepared to go out on the first date he'd had in years.  
  
There was a knock on the door. With all the enthusiasm of a man marching to the gallows, Soun made a weak offer of, "Enter."  
  
Kachiko burst into the room, broad smile beaming at Soun.   
  
Hope griped Soun's heart. She had heard of his dilemma and came to help. Deep down inside he knew she could never stand to have another woman date him. "Just say the word and I'll cancel the date, Kachi." Honor be damned. He would be with his wife no matter what. All she had to do was ask.  
  
Kachiko lifted one eyebrow in surprise. "Don't be ridiculous. I'm here to help you pick out what you're going to wear so you can impress her."  
  
"But I don't want to go out with her. I want to date you!" Soun wailed.   
  
Kachiko slapped him hard across the face, shocking him back to his senses. "Let me make one thing perfectly clear. You are going out with this woman, and you are going to sincerely try to have a good time as well as making her have a good time. She has bared her heart and soul to go out with you when YOU asked HER out. You can't know what it means when a woman leaves herself open for a man she adores and he accepts. The most evil thing a man can do is reject them right afterwards. So let me give you a warning right now. If I catch even a hint of you trying to ruin the evening or copping out, I will never speak to you again."  
  
The sincerity of the threat was unquestionable. That, combined with the fact she was correct, settled the matter with Soun. Only the lowest of men would reject Hinako under these conditions. He bowed his head meekly in deference to his wife's wisdom.  
  
Seeing his acquiescence. Kachiko's mood brightened. "Now, let's see what we can pick out that will knock her off her feet." The girl reevaluated the man with a critical eye. "Or at least shove her off balance. You are a creepy old guy, and we don't have a whole lot to work with. Though for some inexplicable reason, she does have the hots for you. I think we can manage something workable."  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
By the time the doorbell rang for the tenth time, Ranma decided he had enough. He would have answered it earlier, but he swore Kasumi had shouted that she would "Take care of the door." Nine rings later, it was evident something had gone wrong. After getting the door, he'd have to check things out and make sure Kasumi was all right. As long as she didn't try to kiss him in gratitude. The one time she had was way too weird to deal with. He had never thought of Kasumi in those terms, and had no intention of starting now.  
  
Ranma hurried down the corridor to the front hall, shouting out an impatient, "I'm coming! I'm coming!" Upon arriving, he was taken aback by the sight of Kasumi bracing a set of thick boards against the door to prevent it from being opened.   
  
Afraid to ask, but knowing he had to, Ranma said, "What's going on?"  
  
"Miss Hinako's here, so I'm taking care of the door," Kasumi offered in explanation.   
  
"Um, shouldn't you be letting her in."  
  
"She cannot date Father. He already has Mother."  
  
Ranma forced the attempted headache away. "You can't keep her out. She's just going to blast her way in through the door or a wall or something." It was a miracle she hadn't already. He suspected she wanted to keep the destruction to a minimum so as to make a good impression, but even her patience would have limits. Besides, once she fired off her blast, she'd be in her younger state, and then seek out a source of life energy to reinvigorate her. Ranma tended to be one of her more popular targets.  
  
Reluctantly, Kasumi accepted his reasoning and allowed Ranma to remove the boards. He threw open the door just as an irate Hinako had her arms held up, forming a circle with her fingers, and prepared to blast her way in. She lowered her hands as she was finally allowed entry to the house.   
  
Even Ranma was a touch taken aback by the sight before him. Hinako was dressed in a stunning off the shoulder red dress and long, white elbow length gloves. The cut to the outfit was low, showing off a great deal of impressive cleavage, and the cut was such that it showed off her very womanly curves. She wore a light shade of make-up that accentuated her already attractive features without overdoing it. She was simply stunning..  
  
Hinako's irritation at being forced to wait disappeared with the open door. She bowed before the pair. "Is Soun in?"  
  
"He's dead," Kasumi answered.   
  
"She's kidding," Ranma said quickly before Hinako could react to the statement. "Come on in."  
  
Hinako entered the home. "Thank you for having me over."  
  
Kasumi followed up with, "You don't want to date Father. He beats women up."  
  
"If I was married to that little brat, I'd beat her up, too." Hinako's eyebrow twitched and slight hint of anger entered her voice. It left just as quickly and she turned pleasant again. "Would one of you kindly inform Soun I am here?"  
  
"I'll get him." Ranma hurried off.  
  
"Father's impotent," Kasumi told Hinako.  
  
"When the times comes, I think I can take care of that," she said, adding a meaningful wink, posing slightly for Kasumi's benefit.  
  
Ranma appeared, dragging a reluctant Soun in tow and with Kachiko pushing him from behind.   
  
Once Soun was shoved before Hinako, he was forced to actually look at her. For a moment, his vision fogged over as the undeniable beauty of the woman affected him. He gulped slightly.  
  
"It's so wonderful to see you, Soun," Hinako cooed.   
  
Kachiko prodded him with an elbow.  
  
"Yes, it's wonderful to see you, too," he answered.  
  
Kachiko tried her best to be civil to the house guest. "That dress hides your sag well."  
  
"A problem you'll never have, since there's nothing for gravity to affect. And I don't have sag."  
  
The girls shared a mutual glare at one another, neither blinking as the tension between them rose.  
  
Surprisingly, it was Soun who defused the situation. He offered his arm to Hinako. "Perhaps we should go now."  
  
That shook Hinako out of her anger. She accepted the arm as she genuflected in Soun's presence. "Yes, it would be wonderful to go out with you. It's like a dream come true."  
  
With a visible effort, Kachiko said, "You two should get going. Have a good time. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."  
  
"If you're certain," Soun said, a reminder of Kachiko's ability to end things with a word.  
  
She waved her hand at the pair, face twitching and a light sheen of sweat breaking out on her brow. "Shoo. Go on now."  
  
Soun sighed in defeat and escorted Hinako out the door.   
  
Once the pair were out of earshot and the door closed behind them, Kachiko slumped against a wall, visibly drained of energy.   
  
Mystified, Ranma said, "You seemed pretty choked up about them going out."  
  
"It's Mother's feelings for Father coming through," Kasumi said.  
  
Kachiko snorted. "Get real. The only reason I had a problem with the situation is because I don't want to see that size changing witch happy. But unloading the geriatric pervert on someone else is more important. Besides, getting stuck with that old guy is punishment enough for any woman."  
  
Ranma breathed a sigh of relief. "That's taken care of. Hinako's gone, and I didn't get drained."  
  
"I'm the one she's been draining," Kachiko pointed out.  
  
"That's true. Thanks for helping out." He slapped Kachiko affectionately on the back. Not being drained was fun. Sort of like not having a hundred paper cuts all over one's body.  
  
"You can show your appreciation by helping me tag along with those two," Kachiko said.  
  
Ranma showed his interest in the suggestion by backing away. "Why would I want to do something like that? Why would you want to, for that matter? You don't even like either of them."  
  
Kachiko stared at the closed door. "I have to make sure everything goes right and they hit it off really well, or all of this is nothing more than a night away from the old guy hitting on me. Besides, I got a bad feeling about this date. I want to be there for damage control if it's necessary."  
  
"Heck, I get those feelings all the time. I'm always right, too." Ranma became mournful.  
  
"All the more reason to go along and try to see things safely through. Now help me out here."  
  
"If I do, will it count as a date?" Ranma asked hopefully.  
  
"No, but I'll compromise. When we do go out to eat on our official date, I won't order the most expensive thing on the menu and just pick at it and make you feel like you completely wasted your money."  
  
Ranma considered the proposition. From what other guys said when they went out on dates, girls always did that to them. It sounded like a decent concession. "Okay, deal." Besides, Ranma had something of an interest in the matter. Soun Tendou had given him a roof to live under for a while, and if Hinako was dating him, she was happy and less likely to drain Ranma. He would come out ahead if the two hit it off.  
  
Besides, it was just a date --one not involving him or one of his romantic interests-- what could possibly go wrong?  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Soun found his thoughts racing as he and his date walked briskly to the upscale restaurant. Kachiko herself had made the reservations to ensure they would have the 'right sort of atmosphere for their date'. In that she had proven all too helpful, much to Soun's chagrin. It was just more bad luck dumped by the truckload on him.  
  
After informing Hinako of their destination, Soun had suggested taking the train so they could get there quickly. Hinako refused, saying she preferred walking. Now they were arm-in-arm as they strolled leisurely through the neighborhood, toward the shopping district where the restaurant was located.  
  
Despite his protests, Soun found himself concerned about making a good impression with Hinako. Manly pride, which he still possessed to a small degree, would not allow him to make a poor showing, even if he had no interest in the woman. Or more to the point, no romantic interest.  
  
Hinako moved closer, snuggling briefly against Soun's side and he could feel the swell of her breast pressed against his arm. Soun found his body reacting to the contact. There was no denying Hinako was a very desirable woman. She was attractive, had a generous build, and was even a good bit younger than him. It was also obvious she was interested in him, which was flattering to his ego. There were no drawbacks or distasteful characteristics to her at all.  
  
Sparing a look -that was not a leer, he assured himself- he realized that there was something familiar about her. Not something about her personally, as much as her appearance reminded him of someone. It took a moment for the name to surface. Minato! That was it. Hinako's husky voice and ample build reminded Soun of the only other woman he had loved. While there were obvious differences, there were enough physical similarities that the familiar chord struck within him suddenly made dealing with Hinako much easier.   
  
Why not have a good time, Soun finally decided? He hadn't been out on a date in ages, and at the least it would serve to knock some of the rust off his romantic inclinations. He wasn't agreeing to marry the woman. It was a simple date that had come about because of a misunderstanding. There were no commitment issues involved, and the truth was, it felt good to spend some time with a woman after more than ten years of loneliness.   
  
Much more relaxed than at any point in the last couple of days, Soun decided to cut loose and enjoy himself.  
  
Xxxxxxx  
  
Since they were on the street level and had a limited view of their surroundings, the dating couple were unaware of the additional shadows they had picked up. Leaping from rooftop to rooftop, two figures followed the course the pair on the ground were taking.  
  
Kachiko spoke quietly, so as to not alert their targets. "The old fogy's keeping his hands to himself."  
  
"He's said he's not interested in her," Ranma reminded her.  
  
"He can't keep his hands off me," Kachiko said with distaste. "I automatically assumed he'd go after any girl that he had alone. I mean, I know I'm a lot better looking than the walking bust, but guys with no sense in what really makes a woman sexy go for skanky girls like her. And she seems the type to sleep with any guy that throws a little attention her way."  
  
For a brief moment, Ranma pictured Soun and Hinako in a romantic clench, and immediately felt nauseated. No way did he want to think of those two like that. He wasn't comfortable of thinking of any girl in such a compromising situation.   
  
"You don't go for girls like that, do you?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"Heck no!" Hinako was way too old, or too young, depending on the situation, for him to think of her in those sorts of terms.   
  
"Good," Kachiko said in an oddly satisfied tone.  
  
Ranma wasn't sure why, but Kachiko seemed to be looking upon him with approval. Despite not knowing what he had done to earn it, it made him feel at ease, a very good thing since he was going to be at her side most of the evening. That was something that had angered Akane to no end. He couldn't figure out why, since Kachiko had specifically said they were not going on a date, just chaperoning one to insure no one tried to disturb it. Akane hadn't seen it that way, seemed to think they were up to something on the sly, and stomped off in a fit of anger. It was stupid, really. He'd have let her come along too, if she had asked.  
  
The display of anger was hardly the first. While Akane always had something of a temper, she had been acting increasingly moody since Kachiko's return, and was getting progressively worse with each passing day. At least some of the ire was directed toward Kachiko, though Ranma couldn't understand that either since, aside from taking Akane's room, the two had little in the way of interaction together. Most of Kachiko's time was being spent with Nabiki, and it was in a good way rather than the 'Let me hug you so I can find a good spot to sink this knife in' attitude they had first held toward one another.  
  
For some bizarre reason, Akane was becoming increasingly angry with Ranma, and he hadn't done anything to deserve it. Other times she just acting strangely, usually when he was just speaking his mind, like about postponing the engagement. After the amusement park, she had become twice as bad. He still couldn't figure that one out. It wasn't his fault that idiotic hypnotist tricked him into thinking he was a monkey, but Akane acted as if he had committed some great offense. The mood swings were getting a bit tiring, even for Ranma. He hoped she got better soon.   
  
Admittedly, it wasn't hard to figure out where the dramatic mood swings originated. While Ranma wasn't a thing like his father, the same could not be said about Akane and Kachiko. They shared a lot of similar traits outside of their physical similarity to one another. A quick temper seemed to be something Akane had inherited from her mother, though Kachiko was quicker to forgive as well incite. While Ranma had mostly adjusted to the physical similarities, sometimes the common traits in their personalities still threw him. The two were different from one another in other behaviors, but they were family. Of that there was no doubt.  
  
Time spent with Kachiko wasn't bad. He enjoyed it to a large degree, as long as she didn't try to put the moves on him. Like now. They had a common goal, and were working together to see it through. It was times like these he liked her company, even if she was a blowhard that wasn't half as good as she thought she was. And she did have a propensity to be shifty. And drank a bit too much. But she was under a considerable amount of stress with being in a different time and finding out she was supposed to die young.   
  
He could understand, and even sympathize with her troubles. She even tended to take his side in matters, like the engagement thing, which few people, outside of Akane, did. The pros outweighed the cons when it came to spending time with her. She was kind of fun to hang around with, though she had a tendency to attract trouble.  
  
Kachiko elbowed him in the side, breaking him out of his reverie. "What's that over there?"  
  
Ranma looked in the direction she was pointing. Accompanying a loud roar was a motorcycle gang approaching the couple. They were a boisterous lot of imposing figures decked out in riding leathers and with their gang emblems hanging from their bikes. At the head of the pack rode the largest of them all, a man nearly seven feet in height and wearing a hockey mask that concealed his features. They radiated an aura of barely restrained menace and violence, palpable even from Ranma's rooftop perch. Despite being a few streets away from the dating couple, it did seem as though they were taking the most direct course toward them.  
  
"I smell trouble." Kachiko leaped across the rooftops in order to intercept the gang before they made it to Soun and Hinako.  
  
Ranma followed hot on her heels.  
  
The series of leaps ended only two streets away from Soun and Hinako's current position. Kachiko landed well in front of the approaching gang, holding her hand out and motioning them to break. Ranma landed behind her, content to allow her to take the lead.  
  
The Road Ronin waved at his gang to slow down. They fell into position behind him, spreading out as though they were a hungry wave of metal prepared to bury any opposition beneath their treads at the slightest provocation.  
  
"What do you want, little girl?" The Road Ronin sneered in contempt.  
  
"You wouldn't happen to be lusting for revenge upon a size changing witch called Hinako, are you?"  
  
The biker leader drew back in surprise. "How could you tell?"  
  
"I know my luck. Any other answer would have made things too easy." Kachiko sighed in disgust. "Ordinarily, I would be more than happy to allow you to extract a pound of flesh from her, her chest could sure spare it, but it just so happens she's doing me a favor in taking a creepy old guy off my hands. I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to turn around and go home."  
  
The request was met with deep laughter from the gang. Once the laughter died down, the Road Ronin said, "If you had a better build, I'd make you my 'bitch of the week'. But since you don't, I'll just have to content myself with dragging you behind my bike for a couple of miles before getting my revenge on Hinako."  
  
"You couldn't drag a little kid in that piece of crap bike!" Kachiko stuck out her tongue.   
  
"How dare you insult my motorcycle! I'll kill you!" The Road Ronin signaled to his men to run her down.  
  
Ranma grabbed Kachiko by the shoulder and forced her behind him. "These guys look dangerous. You'd better let me handle this."  
  
"Okay." Kachiko took off running in the opposite direction.   
  
Ranma watched in stunned silence as for the first time ever, Kachiko did as she was told. It was unbelievable. Women never listened to him. What did he do to make her listen, and more importantly, what could he do to make her do it again?  
  
The rattle of a chain alerted Ranma that there were more important matters at hand than figuring out how he had managed that one. He ducked before the metal links caved in his skull, allowing them to whistle through the air just above his head. Ranma retaliated with a backfist to the biker's jaw, knocking his attacker off the bike and onto the ground, where he skidded along the asphalt for a half dozen meters before sliding to a stop.  
  
The rest of the bikers revved up their engines and surrounded Ranma in a circle of roaring, rotating steel. Nearly every man was armed with chains, pipes, or other weapons with an extended reach. All of them were slavering in anticipation of using them.  
  
Just outside the circle, the Road Ronin stood on top of the handlebars of his motorcycle, his merciless eyes boring holes through the youth that dared place himself between the gang leader and the true target of his rage. "You have made a mistake, boy, interfering with my revenge. Now feel the wrath of the Road Ronin and his gang of-"  
  
Ranma interrupted. "Hey, can we skip the long-winded introduction and move directly to the action?"  
  
The Road Ronin seemed at a loss. He considered the matter. "Well, it sort of goes against standard biker protocol. Usually I go through a full minute of preamble and intimidation before moving on to the beating." The leader looked at his watch. "I am sort of in a hurry and running late. The wife wants me back by ten, and I still have to get my revenge on Hinako. I guess I can let it slide this one time."  
  
"Thanks," Ranma said appreciatively .  
  
The Road Ronin snapped his fingers. The rotating ring of bikers closed in on Ranma.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Content with the knowledge that Ranma could handle himself against some smelly biker gang, Kachiko returned to her original objective. Rather than continuing her pursuit of Soun and Hinako from overhead, she decided to take a more preventative measure by scouting ahead of the pair. It was easy enough, knowing which restaurant they were going to limited the number of paths they could take to it. Her precaution paid off as she spotted a suspicious looking pack of women clustered around the middle of the sidewalk, one street away from the restaurant. They appeared to be idly hanging around, but a closer inspection showed wary gazes that shouted out they were looking for someone in particular and wanted to do something other than offering them a cigarette.  
  
Kachiko casually strolled past the group, trying to listen for any snatch of conversation that would let her know the identity of who they were waiting for. There was only talk of make-up and men. No names came up, and soon Kachiko was clear of the group. Now she found herself at an impasse. She didn't want to pick a fight with a bunch of strangers, even if they were trashy-looking tramps that crossdressers like Yumi probably went for. They were rough-looking and a touch on the butch side. They might even be lesbians themselves. Kachiko heard those kind of girls tended to hang out in packs. On the other hand, Kachiko had walked past without being hit upon; there wasn't even a catcall directed toward her. So that meant they were probably straight, just in need of a major fashion overhaul.   
  
Kachiko was still left with the issue of determining whether or not the girls were going to cause a problem or were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. She had to figure something out fast. Soun and Hinako would be appearing any minute now. Eventually a plan came to her. Looking further up the street, she called out, "Hello there, Miss Hinako! Bust any delinquents lately?"  
  
The gang perked up, openly eager for a fight as they looked up the street, trying to see to whom Kachiko was speaking to.  
  
That was all the evidence Kachiko needed. "While I can appreciate your desire to kick the crap out of that annoying bitch, I'm afraid I have to keep her from being molested by anyone other than her date."  
  
Realizing they had been tricked, the gang parted and allowed their leader to move to the front and confront Kachiko.  
  
"Who in the hell are you?" Keiko asked, cigarette dangling from her mouth as she spoke.  
  
Kachiko smirked. "I am a martial artist of great renown. My skills in the art of hand-to-hand combat are unparalleled among the ranks of mortal man. In the halls of Furinkan High, where I reign mostly supreme, I have been given the dreaded title of... 'The Sukeban Slayer'. She posed dramatically.  
  
Keiko laughed so hard her cigarette flew out of her mouth. The rest of the gang followed suit.  
  
"Sukeban Slayer? You don't look like you could slay my brother's hamster."  
  
"The only clash you can handle is the one your clothes are having right now."  
  
"You're lying. You were never called 'Sukeban Slayer."  
  
"Am too," Kachiko said, even if she was the only one that had called herself that. She should have been called that, though. She had taken out gangs of thug girls, just like this one, on several different occasions.  
  
"I'll take care of this," Keiko told the others as she drew her yo-yo out and let it dangle from her finger.  
  
Kachiko laughed at the display. "Oh no. A yo-yo. Whatever shall I do? Perhaps I should counter you with my dreaded 'Hopscotch Houkudo'. Hahahaha!"  
  
The laughter ended as Keiko flicked her wrist, striking her laughing foe right between the eyes with the yo-yo with a hard and swift blow.  
  
Kachiko's vision blurred and she staggered back, barely shaking her head free of the cobwebs that threatened to take her over. "Okay, I didn't see that one coming."  
  
Showing her contempt, Keiko didn't follow up the attack and instead lit another cigarette. She blew a puff of smoke in Kachiko's direction. "Not very impressive for a Sukeban Slayer."  
  
Face swelling slightly, Kachiko shifted into an attack stance. She might have taken the gang girl lightly, but no longer. The leader had some true potential, and odds said there were a few more in the gang that could make Kachiko break a sweat. Worse, there was no time left to posture. Soun and Hinako could appear at any moment. If they came upon a fight, especially one with Kachiko involved, it would ruin everything. Lacking the time needed to defeat the girls either as a group or one at a time, Kachiko had to focus all of their attention on her and lure them away from the street.  
  
Her mind sifted through the various techniques she knew that could make the gang girls follow her to the ends of the earth. What could she do to make them that angry? What had people done to Kachiko herself that enraged her so badly she dropped everything to seek revenge?  
  
One thing immediately sprang to mind. It was something that crossdressing pervert, Yumi used to do when Kachiko's guard was down, leaving her enraged for days afterward. It took months to master the technique, all for the purpose of understanding it enough to form an effective counter to it. The very thought of using the attack against another girl made Kachiko sick to the stomach, but desperate times called for desperate measures.   
  
Resigned to using the technique, Kachiko prepared to attack. She just prayed no one saw her use it, or she'd never live the humiliation down.   
  
Keiko began twirling her yo-yo back and forth, prepared to launch an attack of her own.  
  
The two were a blur as the raced toward one another at top speed. The rest of the gang saw the foes pass by one another, the sound of an impact reaching their ears as the duo continued past each other as though they had missed. Neither turned around, but remained facing in the same direction they had started in.  
  
There was a rustling sound as the material of Kachiko's left shirt sleeve fell to the ground, as though it had been severed by a blade.  
  
Keiko knew by the sound that her attack had been successful. She turned and smirked at her foe. "That's a point for me."  
  
"And two points for me," Kachiko announced as she took a drag on the cigarette that dangled from her mouth.  
  
"That's only one point," Keiko said in annoyance at having fallen victim to the attack.  
  
"Ah, no, it's two." Kachiko spun a pair of panties around on her finger.  
  
Keiko felt under her skirt, and the lack of something there. Her face blushed furiously, as she shouted, "You sick pervert! Give me back my panties!"  
  
"Come and get them," Kachiko taunted, fleeing down a connecting alley as fast as she could. Using the technique hadn't been as painfully bad as she anticipated. Actually, it had been kind of fun, in a twisted sort way. She just hoped Ranma or any of the others didn't see her use it, or she'd never hear the end of it.  
  
Kachiko had just made it to the end of the alley and around the corner, coming onto the street it emptied into, when she slammed into the back of a tall, broad-shouldered man. Caught off-guard, Kachiko fell onto her backside, while the large man only grunted, barely being budged an inch.  
  
Kachiko shot back to her feet and leveled an accusatory finger at the man. "Hey you !#$%, watch where you're goAHHH!"  
  
Kachiko screamed as the man, and the dozen large compatriots in front of him, turned at the loud disturbance Kachiko was making. She recognized the belt full of weapons, the stun sticks they wielded in their beefy hands, and the cheesy fuchsia berets they wore.  
  
The CLAP had found her again.  
  
The eyes of the large man she had bumped into widened in recognition. "Hey, it's that child molesting pervert that attacked us a few weeks ago."  
  
"I am not a pervert!" Kachiko shouted.  
  
It was at that moment Keiko and her gang of sukeban burst from the alleyway, the leader shouting, "Give me back my panties!"  
  
Kachiko looked at the finger the panties dangled from, the one that was leveled at the CLAP. "I can explain! This isn't what it looks like!"  
  
"That's what they all say," the leader of the CLAP intoned menacingly as he stepped toward Kachiko. The other men followed suit.  
  
Behind Kachiko, Keiko and her gang did the same.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Hinako paused in her walk long to enough to look down an alleyway.   
  
"What is it?" Soun asked.  
  
"I thought I heard a scream of pain. I was probably hearing things." Hinako decided to let the incident pass. Ordinarily she would investigate the disturbance, hoping for the opportunity to drain some delinquent of their energy. Tonight was different. She had more important matters to deal with. Romance took precedent over discipline, after all.   
  
The pair continued their casual stroll until they arrived at their destination. The outside of the restaurant was sedate, if tasteful. They entered and informed the maitre'd of their reservation. The service proved itself outstanding as the maitre'd quickly ushered them toward their table. As they sat down, Soun noticed their arrival had drawn the stares of many people, mostly men, who looked upon Hinako with lust and at Soun with envy. The former made him irritated and defensive; Hinako was with him, and they had no business looking at her as though they could have her. The latter made him fill with pride. He was unable to remember the last time anyone was envious of him, even if it was only for the company he kept.  
  
A part of Soun knew he shouldn't feel that way. He wasn't interested in Hinako. He couldn't be. He had his wife back, sort of. Except it was Kachiko who had insisted he go out with Hinako, and Kachiko wasn't exactly the same as she was before. She was a lot like the Kachiko he had been thrust into an arranged marriage with, but not quite. Thinking about the matter, he decided it was more like she was the potential to be that woman, rather than the actual person. Despite her continued presence, and the reminder of what he had once had, in some ways the Kachiko with him now merely made him want his dead wife all the more. It was paradoxical, and difficult to sort things out.  
  
"Are you all right?" Hinako asked in concern at the far off cast Soun's eyes had taken.  
  
It was such a simple question, yet Soun realized it was almost never directed toward him. No one ever displayed much consideration over his feelings. Not his best friend, not his young wife, not even his daughters. It made him realize how lonely he was. That he was with someone concerned about his emotions made him feel wanted. Hinako was proving herself wonderful company. He found enjoying himself and making the date go well was proving much easier than he thought it would be. Keeping his promise to Kachiko was going to be easy.   
  
For the first time in recent memory, Soun pushed his concerns aside and decided to enjoy the evening. "I'm fine," he answered. And more importantly, he meant it.  
  
Xxxxxxx  
  
The kitchen was a flurry of activity as food was prepared and served to the clientele in the dining area. Cooks, managers, and waiters moved in a tangle that would make morning rush hour traffic seem orderly by comparison.   
  
The confusion made it easy for a ninja of Kyosuke Takiawa's skill to pick open the lock of the back door of the restaurant, go the locker room to steal a waiter's uniform, then blend in with his surroundings.   
  
So far everything had proven easy. The Conehead's information concerning Hinako's whereabouts had been accurate. Unlike the smelly biker fools, or the sukeban tramps, Kyosuke had easily spotted the two people trailing Hinako. It was easy to avoid them with his superior mastery of moving silently in shadows. Kyosuke was so talented sometimes even he didn't realize he was around.   
  
After confirming no others would get in his way, the path to his enemy was clear and he could execute his revenge. It was a simple plan. He would impersonate Hinako's waiter, slipping a special poison in her food. It wouldn't kill her. That would be too simple. Instead, he had something much more elaborate in mind. The poison he'd slip her would merely render her in a deathlike state, one that even the most highly trained of physicians could not discern from actual death. Then, when her body was shipped to a morgue, he would steal it. With Hinako legally declared dead, no one would seek her out. Then his insidious revenge would begin.   
  
He'd set up a classroom and make her take classes he was teaching by tying her to a chair. Then he'd fail her for not attending them, even though she was there. Then, when she tried to alter her grades, he would make sure she couldn't. That would give her a taste of the hell he went through. Oh yes, she was going to pay for her sins in that hell of his own devising. He was almost sorry for her. Almost.  
  
The ninja watched carefully as a waiter took Hinako's order. As the man came through the door to the kitchen, Kyosuke took him aside, claiming a manager wanted to see him. Once the two were out of sight, Kyosuke hit him in the back of the head, then stuffed him in one of the lockers in the changing room.   
  
Kyosuke looked over the order. So, Hinako had chosen the salmon mousse. It appeared revenge truly was going to be a dish served cold.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxx  
  
Soun found himself slightly uncomfortable as Hinako gazed upon him in open adoration. It wasn't so much from the stare as Soun finding his reaction to it most improper. He found his memory drifting to some of the things she shared outwardly with Minato, and wondered if the resemblance was more than superficial. Minato had been an incredibly talented woman, after all.  
  
No! He had to keep such lecherous thoughts from his mind. This was their first date. It had taken three months before he and Kachiko had progressed to that sort of relationship. And for him and Minato... Well, the circumstances surrounding his first 'date' with her were considerably different from a standard relationship. A comparison didn't hold up there. But it had been so long since he had enjoyed the company of a woman.   
  
For the longest time, Soun simply didn't have the desire to think of them that way. Then the first time Hinako had come around, she had made him consider such things to the point he asked his daughters how they would feel if he remarried. Receiving unequivocal 'No's from all of them, he tempered those feelings for a while. But the return of a younger, incredibly sexy Kachiko, had brought them back with a vengeance. It was on the verge of being painful, and his body cried out for some form of relief. Hinako, and the body she had, could certainly help him with his problem, and she seemed attracted to him. They were adults. It would be fine. Many did so. It wasn't the same thing as marriage, after all.  
  
Soun's body was so tense, he broke out in a sweat. How could he think such thoughts concerning another woman when his beloved Kachiko was returned to him? Well, her refusal to allow him near her had a lot to do with it. The harder he tried to get close to her, the more violent she was toward him. It only made the situation worse, not better. Perhaps thinking those thoughts concerning Hinako was only natural.  
  
It was while he was in the middle of his mental diatribe that he felt a bare foot force its way between his legs and make an up and down motion on his crotch.  
  
Surprised, Soun reacted by shooting up to his feet. It was at that exact same moment the waiter arrived with their food. Soun rose so quickly the waiter didn't have time to react as the platter laden with their meal was shoved into his face.   
  
"I'm sorry!" Hinako and Soun said as one, her comments directed toward her date while his were to the waiter he had knocked over.   
  
The waiter rose slowly, stunned from the blow. He started to unleash an angry retort, when he smacked his lips together. His eyes bulged, and he ran as though to make his way to the bathroom. He collapsed halfway there, remaining motionless on the ground.   
  
One of the managers, Jinto Gannosuke, was quick to appear. He snapped his fingers, and two other waiters hoisted the limp body up and back toward the kitchen.   
  
Noting the rest of the patrons were watching the scene in varying degrees of annoyance to scandal, Jinto reassured them. "Don't worry. Kurosawa is anemic and passes out very easily. He'll be fine. Please return to your dining and enjoy."   
  
He went in back toward the kitchen. Once the doors swung shut behind him, Jinto went to find the fallen waiter. He found him, and watched in concern as the two chefs examined the motionless waiter. One of them turned away from the body and informed the manager of his prognosis.   
  
"He's dead, Jin."  
  
Jinto stared in disbelief at the body. "What? How?"  
  
The other chef smelled around the motionless man's mouth. "I believe it was the salmon mousse."  
  
"It's always the salmon mousse," the other chef said sagely.   
  
Jinto wiped the sweat from his brow. "Who is he?"  
  
The second chef shrugged. "Got me. I don't recognize him. He's probably a temp."  
  
"Good, no one will miss him. We'll deal with it the same way we dealt with the mermaid flesh incident back in June." He stared accusingly at the first chef.   
  
"I thought it would be a good appetizer," he said defensively.  
  
"It's poisonous and makes people die violently."  
  
"Not everyone."  
  
"Oh right, some turn into flesh eating monsters instead."  
  
"Some people become immortal."  
  
"What, one out of a hundred?!"  
  
"They do tend tip well afterwards."  
  
"Just throw the body in the dumpster out back," Jinto said tiredly. Before retreating to his office, he told a passing janitor to deal with the mess in the dining room.   
  
The old man did as he was instructed, trudging along with his mop in hand.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Once the commotion died down, Soun returned to his seat. He saw that Hinako instead chose to remain standing, bowing before him. "Please forgive me for my inappropriate behavior."  
  
Noting she was on the verge of tears, he said in reassuring tones, "Now, now. It was nothing."  
  
"It was wrong of me to be so forward. I dishonored you," she insisted.   
  
Soun chuckled. "Actually, I'll let you in on a secret. My wife did that same thing to me once when we were dating. I reacted the same way. So I think it's safe to say no offense was taken now any more than it was then."  
  
Hinako smiled at him, almost childlike in the way she gazed upon him. "Thank you so much. You don't know how much it means..." she trailed off, staring curiously at her hand.  
  
"What is it?" Soun asked.   
  
"Some of the food spilled on my clothes," she said quickly. "I have to go the lavatory and clean up." Distraught, she hurried off before Soun could offer a word of protest.  
  
Soun was left staring curiously at her retreating form. He could have sworn the food had been flung in the opposite direction of his date.  
  
As distracted as he was, he failed to notice the janitor cease cleaning up the spill and head toward the women's restroom.  
  
Xxxxxx  
  
The door to the restroom had barely swung shut when Hinako felt the familiar sensation of reverting to her younger form. Tearfully she walked to the wall to wall mirror over the sink and forced herself to look at her image. She had been so excited over the course of the date she had unintentionally radiated a lot of excess energy and the supply that should have lasted all night instead had given out no more than halfway in. She had almost changed in front of Soun, and that would have ruined everything. Turning into an eight year old child was the quickest way to kill any romance that had been building up. He'd never want to see her again. He wouldn't want to see her now. The date was over! She slumped next to the sink and began bawling like a little child.   
  
The door to the restroom opened, and Tatsumi stalked in, recognizing his prey's younger form immediately. Clementine at the fore, he prepared to lunge at the girl before she had a chance to do anything.   
  
Hinako was faster, as, upon hearing someone enter the bathroom, she had drawn her coin and called out "Happo-gojuuen Setsu!"  
  
Tatsumi had closed only half the distance toward Hinako when he felt his life force sucked out of his body. He crumpled to the ground, the draining so all-consuming that even Clementine looked thinner than before.  
  
The now adult Hinako looked down at the dried out form of the janitor. He had possessed a surprisingly strong battle aura. Obviously the man attacked dirt with true passion. Hinako felt filled with enough energy to make it through the rest of the night.   
  
Delight replacing depression, Hinako returned to enjoying the rest of her date.  
  
Xxxxxxx  
  
It was an exhausted, physically drained Ranma that dragged himself in the direction of the restaurant that Soun and Hinako were dining at. Running across rooftops was out of the question. He was lucky to walk with the limp in his right leg. He was certain a disc had slipped in his back too. It had been a rough fight. Things had been fine until the Road Ronin had jumped into the brawl. He had some sort of pressure point attack that had done a number on Ranma's muscles every time the huge man landed a blow, even if it was a block Ranma was using. It had gotten tricky then, and might have ended badly until Ranma led him into a Hiryuu Shouten Ha. It was one of the most difficult feats he had ever accomplished. While the Road Ronin had more than enough hot chi channeling through him to use the technique, Ranma had to run backward quickly, since the huge man had fought from the back of his moving motorcycle the entire time.   
  
Ranma had dragged himself most of the way there when a shadowy figure lunged out from a connecting alleyway. Ranma came close to punching the person out, but recognized her just in time to pull back his fist.  
  
Kachiko was covered in bruises, black char marks, and curiously, panties. "What happened to you?"  
  
"I ran into some old friends and made some new ones." Her voice was exhaustion personified. "Let's go back home."  
  
"What about the date?"  
  
"I'd rather jump off an eighteen foot diving board and into an empty pool than keep watching them." She sighed. "I'm so tired, I don't even care if the old creep tries to jump in bed with me again. I just want to go to sleep."  
  
Ranma was inclined to agree. He had never envisioned chaperoning being such hard work.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Soun and Hinako exited the restaurant, giggling inappropriately loud. The wine undoubtedly had a great deal to do with it. Things had gone so well after the collision with the waiter that Soun splurged and ordered a bottle of wine, and a not altogether inexpensive one at that. Despite the cost, the atmosphere had been too perfect to pass up. It had definitely been the correct choice.  
  
Now the streets were deserted as the two made their way out of the restaurant, swaying as much as walking down the street in their revelry.  
  
The restaurant was only a block behind them when Hinako staggered, one of her heels catching in a crack. In her drunken stupor, she teetered into Soun, and would have fallen altogether had his martial arts reflexes, despite being dulled as they were by the alcohol, kicked in and he caught her.   
  
"Are you all right?" he asked.  
  
"Better than all right with where you're holding me." Hinako stared meaningfully at where his hands were affixed to her chest.  
  
Soun finally noticed. "I'm sorry!" he said, withdrawing his hands from their improper perch.   
  
Still off balance and lacking anything to prop her up, Hinako fell straight onto her bottom.   
  
"I'm sorry!" Soun babbled again, reaching under her arms to heft her up from behind.   
  
"How indecisive," she slurred out.  
  
Soun wondered what she was talking about, then noticed that his hands, having minds of their own and concluding their former grasp was good for holding onto things, latched onto Hinako in the exact same spot as before.  
  
Just as Soun's grip started to loosen, Hinako's own hands came to trap his, making certain they stayed right where they were. The intention was unmistakable.   
  
Soun gulped loudly. He knew he should insist on removing them, but could not find the resolve to make the thought reality. Instead they remained right where they were, the soft, yet firm, flesh producing a thousand different conflicting emotions in the father of three.   
  
While Soun was racked with indecision, Hinako moved back into his embrace. In her deep, sultry voice, she whispered, "You're the first man I've ever allowed to touch me like this. Please, leave them there."  
  
A triphammer was pounding in Soun's chest, and he wondered if his heart would break a rib with how powerfully it beat. He shouldn't be there, with another woman, doing this. A different portion of his mind demanded he stay. Yet a third had the audacity to insist he act like a man and further things on his own initiative, rather than forcing Hinako to control the tempo of the date.   
  
Hinako peered over her shoulder. In her heels, she was tall enough to look Soun in the eye. Slowly she brought her face toward his, and he began to do the same.  
  
"Well, well, well, if this isn't the most touching thing I've ever seen. It would move me to tears, if I was still capable of them."  
  
The voice cut through the building aura of mutual passion that had tuned out the rest of the world. Reminded that they were in the middle of a public street, and what they had been doing, Soun withdrew his hands as though Hinako's skin had caught fire. Hinako adjusted her outfit, which had ridden up during her falling and rising from the ground.  
  
The pair focused on the man who had interrupted their public tryst.   
  
Hinako was stunned. "You, poor, poor man, I can't imagine what deformity you have that forces you to wear that awful headgear."  
  
"It looks like he's a giant pimple ready to burst," Soun said in open-mouthed wonder.  
  
"That is not my head! It's just a costume!" the Gargoyle raged.  
  
"You look more ridiculous than that panda drawing that tried to date Ranma," Soun said, recalling the carnival incident, one of the less than memorable experiences in his future son-in-law's life.  
  
"It's stylish!" the Gargoyle insisted.   
  
"It's the most horrible thing I've ever seen," Hinako said.  
  
"I don't have to take that from you of all people," the Gargoyle intoned menacingly. "All of those other idiots I recruited might have failed miserably, but that's all right. Orchestrating your defeat is nowhere near as satisfying as taking my revenge on you personally."  
  
"I've never met you before," Hinako assured him. "I'm certain I'd remember someone that looks like a giant dildo."  
  
"I'll show you!" The Gargoyle removed his helmet, all four feet of it, and tossed it to the ground. He then flexed his muscles, shredding the white uniform he wore, leaving him in nothing more than a torn set of white boxers  
  
Beneath the helmet was a visage straight out of sixteenth century cathedral architecture. Now the Gargoyle looked far more like his namesake, displaying a monstrous red face, with inhumanly large canines, a snout, and small white horns poking out from his brow. Blood red eyes seemed to take in Hinako's form with an inhuman hunger. His physique was every bit as demonic as his face, with the huge, rippling muscles that were large, and in some cases exaggerated beyond human dimensions, including what lay hidden beneath his boxers.  
  
"I don't recall meeting any demons either," Hinako told him.  
  
"I didn't look like this back then!" the Gargoyle roared. "Back in high school, I was nothing more than a poor, misunderstood youth. All I wanted was attention from my peers and recognition from those in charge. But I was cruelly treated by the system, and especially by you!"  
  
"So you were a delinquent of some kind?" Hinako asked.   
  
"Don't label me, you bitch! That's the same attitude you displayed toward me back then, and look what it turned me into!"  
  
"You took steroids?"  
  
"I made a deal with a sex-demon!" he shrieked.   
  
"You sold him your soul?"  
  
The Gargoyle calmed down. "Actually, no. It only cost me ten thousand yen. Rellram wasn't what you would call a great bargainer. I got off pretty darn lucky in acquiring this powerful body, as well as the 'special attachments' if you know what I mean, for a bargain basement price."  
  
"I still don't know who you are," Hinako said.  
  
"I am Kenji Yasuroka. A student whose life you tormented until it drove me to the brink of insanity."  
  
"You're Kenji 'The Pervert' Yasuroka?" Hinako asked, the dawn of realization finally showing in her eyes. "I do remember you. You would hike up girls' skirts, sneak into their lockers rooms, take naughty pictures, and all other sorts of delinquent things."   
  
"Being interested in the opposite sex is not a sign of being a delinquent!"  
  
"It is when the girls don't want you holding them up to ridicule," Hinako said, her voice taking on an authoritative tone. "You were one of the worst delinquents I ever had to deal with. I had to drain you at least five times a day to get you to stop. It took what, two months straight of draining, including coming by your house weekends, to make you stop harassing all the girls in school?"  
  
"And it permanently drained me of my ability to..." What started out as a yell became a whisper. "You know, become excited around women."  
  
Hinako laughed. "Impossible. My abilities don't work that way. Even repeated draining over an extended period of time has no long term effects. I've drained weaker people than you a lot longer, and they were fine. If you had any problems with arousal, they were psychological, not physical. Perhaps you finally felt guilt at objectifying women for so long and that was the punishment your mind chose."  
  
"It was not my fault! It was yours!" the Gargoyle went from raging to unleashing a hungry look at Hinako. "And now you'll pay. Thanks to my deal, I'm able to be a true man once again. And I've been saving my improvements just for you." He took a step forward.  
  
Hinako turned red at the implication. Her hand, which had been drifting toward the pocket in her dress since the conehead first appeared, whipped out her largest coin. She lined up the hole in the center with the demon, then shouted out "Happo-gojuuen Setsu!"  
  
The Gargoyle's only reaction was to take another step forward, his gait unaffected by Hinako's attempt to drain him. His feral smile grew at the confusion on her face.  
  
Hinako felt a surge of panic and called out the draining attack again, but still she felt nothing flow from his body and into her.  
  
The Gargoyle said, "That won't work. One of the deals of the pact I made was immunity to your draining and shooting abilities. But you don't have to take my word for it. By all means, release all of your pent up energy at me. I don't care what form you're in when I take my revenge."  
  
The boast, which held the weight of truth, made Hinako back away, uncertain of what to do. She had never encountered someone that was immune to her abilities. As Kachiko had accused her in the past, she was as much a 'one trick pony' as one could get. Her reliance on them was total. She had never bothered learning of another means of defending herself since her inherent abilities had always sufficed. She was helpless in the face of the Gargoyle's obvious power.  
  
Before the creature could draw another step closer, Soun interceded, placing himself between the beast and his prey.   
  
"I won't let you harm her," he warned.  
  
The Gargoyle laughed uproariously, an inhuman rattle that set everyone's teeth on edge. "And exactly what is it you think you can do to me, little man?"  
  
"This!" Holding nothing back, Soun attacked with the full force of his demon head.   
  
The Gargoyle grabbed him casually by his elongated throat, choking the man and making him revert to his human form. He brought Soun's face in close. "You idiot. What good is such an attack against one who is already a demon?!" He threw Soun headfirst into a wall. There was a sickening thud, and Soun's limp form slumped to the ground.  
  
"Soun-chan!" Fear of her foe forgotten, Hinako rushed to be at Soun's side.   
  
She was intercepted by a huge hand that snared her arm, pulling her toward the Gargoyle. She tried scratching him with her nails on her free hand, but they broke harmlessly against his leathery hide. He caught her free hand by the wrist, then forced both into one of his massive paws. Supporting her weight with one hand, he effortlessly suspended her off the ground by her wrists.   
  
He brought her face near his demonic visage. A serpentine tongue darted out, caressing her face. "Yum. Jasmine flavored perfume. Tastes great."  
  
She recoiled at the fetid breath he exhaled.   
  
"Let's see if the rest of you tastes the saARGH!" he snarled in pain, releasing his hold on Hinako's wrists and held his back.  
  
Hinako fell to the ground, landing on her side. Instantly she tried to crawl away from the Gargoyle, looking for Soun at the same time. She saw her date had regained his footing, and had launched some attack into the Gargoyle's unprotected back.   
  
Saliva dripped from the demon's jaws as he continued holding his back in pain. "How dare you attack me! I was content to allow you to escape without harm, but for defending this unworthy woman, and having the audacity to make her happy by showing her a good time, I'm going to do something bad to you! I'm not sure what, since I've never beaten up anyone before, and I've only been fantasizing about Hinako all my life, but I'll come up with something good. In a bad way."  
  
The Gargoyle seemed to draw more power from somewhere as his mass increased. Veins popped out from already inhumanly large muscles that grew as Hinako watched. Steam rose from the creature and his skin's texture turned more red.   
  
Hinako shouted. "Run, Soun! It's me he wants!"   
  
Soun shook his head. "I could hardly call myself a martial artist if I allowed something as simple minded as this fool to ruin one of my dates."  
  
Hinako couldn't believe her ears. "Look at him! He isn't even human!"  
  
"He's nothing compared to my old martial arts master," Soun assured her.  
  
"I've got it!" the Gargoyle shouted. "I'll pull down your pants and spank you until you beg for mercy! That'll show you!"   
  
Both Soun and Hinako cringed.   
  
"All right, you do compare to the Master," Soun conceded. "But nonetheless, I refuse to allow you to lay even a finger on my date."  
  
"Oh, I'm going to lay more than a finger on her," the Gargoyle threatened. Content that he had struck the appropriate amount of fear into the opposition, the Gargoyle rushed to attack Soun, shooting forward with a blinding burst of speed.  
  
"Look out!" Hinako cried.   
  
Soun sidestepped the rush, leaving one foot sticking out. The Gargoyle tripped over the extended foot. Soun helped add velocity to the rush by pushing on the demon's back, taking his turn to send the demon headfirst into the wall.   
  
The Gargoyle recovered from the blow more quickly than Soun had. He lashed out with a wide swing toward Soun's head, intent on hitting a home run using Soun's skull as the ball. The martial artist ducked out of the way and struck with a fast three fist combination to his opponent's chin.  
  
The Gargoyle recoiled in pain and clutched his mouth. "You made me chip a fang!" he whined.  
  
Soun took a moment to give Hinako a reassuring look. "For all of his power, he has no skill. I suffered under one of the most grueling training regimen's the human body could endure. I can handle one lousy demon."  
  
"That's sex demon!" the Gargoyle proclaimed. From his sides and back a mass of tentacles burst forth and lashed out toward Soun.   
  
The numerous appendages caught Soun off guard, and he was relentlessly hammered by the ropy strands of leathery flesh that seemed to be everywhere. Two of them wrapped themselves around his torso, then threw him into the ground a trio of times, before releasing him and leaving his still form embedded in the ruins of the street.  
  
Hinako drew back in horror at the sight. Then her eyes focused on the tentacles, which appeared identical to those that would be on an octopus. "I thought sex demons' tentacles were supposed to be more phallic."  
  
The Gargoyle held his hands up helplessly, all of the tentacles mimicking the movement. "I did only pay ten thousand yen. Rellram had to cut corners somewhere on the transformation. I still think it was a good deal, especially since my original 'tentacle' has been enhanced." He thrust his pelvis meaningfully in Hinako's direction.   
  
Hinako wanted to run, but was fearful. Even if she did escape, that would leave the beaten Soun at the Gargoyle's mercy, and he would be doubly angry at her evasion. There could be no doubt he would take all of his anger out on the helpless Soun. That meant there was no other choice. "If you promise to leave Soun alone, I'll go with you."  
  
At first, the Gargoyle seemed delighted at the woman's shift in attitude. Then it changed just as quickly. "Odd, it's nowhere near as fun if you just give up. I preferred it when you were screaming and terrified of what I implied I was going to do with you. How about if I give you a running start instead?"  
  
"You... won't... touch... her."  
  
The Gargoyle turned in irritation while Hinako stared in shock as Soun forced himself to a standing position.   
  
"No! You can't fight anymore! Just give up!" Hinako insisted.   
  
"Never!" Soun swore.  
  
The Gargoyle watched the interaction, his attention riveted. To Hinako, he said, "You know something. I think the best way I could hurt you was if I was to really pound on your loverboy."  
  
"No!"  
  
The Gargoyle's smile was wide enough to show off all of his fangs. "Oh yes, definitely."  
  
Soun stared boldly at the demon. Taking a page from Ranma's book, he taunted, "Come on over and get some, limpy."  
  
The demon's eyes bulged until the orbs nearly fell out of his skull. "You'll pay for that!"   
  
While the demon raged, Soun pulled out a cigarette, lit it up, and took a long, drawn out puff of it. "Sure I will."  
  
With an incoherent scream, the Gargoyle charged forward in a maddened rush again, intent on pounding on Soun until nothing was left but a fleshy puddle. Just as the fists were about to strike, Soun let the cigarette fall from his lips and jumped up between the fists, using the Gargoyle's head as springboard to vault over the creature. He landed deftly next to Hinako.  
  
The Gargoyle's blow would have struck the street, save that he had already shattered it to reveal the ground underneath. Including a gas main, one his fists, backed by his tremendous strength and even more tremendous rage, crumpled.   
  
"Oops!" the Gargoyle said sheepishly as the abandoned cigarette ignited the sudden release of gas.  
  
Soun threw his tired, beaten body over Hinako's protecting her from the debris kicked up by the explosion. Luckily, the Gargoyle's massive body bore the brunt of it, and Soun was left with only a light bit of singing and some of the smaller pieces of concrete bouncing off his body.   
  
As the residue from the explosion settled, Soun slowly, aching like he couldn't remember, and forced himself to stand up. Just as he regained his vertical base, his legs threatened to give out. Before he could fall, Hinako caught him, supporting him until he could stand on his own.  
  
She stared at him through tearful eyes. "Oh Soun, I can't believe you risked so much. You could have been killed. You're the most courageous man I've ever met."  
  
Despite his pain wracked body, Soun laughed embarrassedly, unused to such gushing praise coming from a member of the opposite sex. Even Kachiko had never referred to him in such glowing terms. "Ah, yes, well, it was nothing."  
  
Hinako said nothing else. Instead she cradled his jaw, bringing her face close to his. Soun could have pulled away, knew he should have, but couldn't seem to force his body to respond.  
  
Her lips were just about to touch when a voice said, "Hey, you jerks! I almost died and you're trying to suck face! Have you no shame?!"  
  
Soun and Hinako turned to see the Gargoyle pull himself from the smoldering ruin that used to be the middle of the street. He was charred around the edges, and several tentacles flapped uselessly at his side, but he appeared fit and able outside of those minor injuries.  
  
"It's a good thing I'm fireproof," the Gargoyle boasted.  
  
Soun gently, but firmly, pushed Hinako aside. "I've had enough of this guy."   
  
The Gargoyle was offended. "Hey, that's my line! I'm the wronged party here, like I have been all my life!"  
  
"Shut up, you whiny little snot!" Soun roared. "All you do is snivel about how no one gave you sympathy and let you do what you wanted and how you've been offended by it. Well I have news for you. You're a self-centered egotistical brat that's hurt others without consideration for their feelings and isn't worth the sympathy you so desperately crave! You're the one that needs to be put over someone's knee and spanked!"  
  
"You're just like all the others and trying to blame me for the faults of others! I'll kill you!" The Gargoyle charged forth once again.  
  
Soun met the charge with one of his own. Once he drew close enough, the demon lashed out with his working tentacles. Soun twisted and turned, evading each one until he drew within the reach of the Gargoyle's arms. The demon tried to hit him with his fists, but Soun deflected those as well.   
  
That left the Gargoyle wide open for a powerful right that Soun put straight to the huge creature's jaw. The blow caused the demon's jaw to snap shut, and recoil from the force of the punch. Soun remained where he was, watching the results of his handiwork.  
  
Whip fast, the Gargoyle shook his head back and forth. He blinked his eyes several times, then firmed up his stance. "Ha! If that's the best you can do, little man, I hope you've made out your will. I'd hate for your descendants to have to fight over their inheritance. I... Hey! Why is it getting dark? It's only ten."  
  
The question was never answered as the Gargoyle collapsed face first into the ground. He didn't move. He just lay there limply, like all of his tentacles.   
  
"That takes care of that." Soun wiped his hands off on his now ruined suit. Despite the way his body ached and pleaded with him to lie down for a while, he was forced to admit that the fight had been exhilarating. He hadn't defeated a proper foe in years, and the battle had been close at the beginning. It made him feel alive and that he had accomplished something of significance, neither an emotion he had felt in some time.  
  
Soun's musings ended abruptly as Hinako nearly tackled him in an embrace. Her eyes were watery as she stared at him in adoration. "No one has ever done anything like that for me before. You could have been hurt keeping that monster from having his way with me."  
  
Though it was the honest truth, Soun still felt embarrassed by the accolades. "Well, a man's got to do what a man's got to do."  
  
"And you are a true man," Hinako gushed as she grabbed him by the face and kissed him long and hard.  
  
Soun's first reaction was to stiffen at the embrace. Then, still on a euphoric high from the endorphins running through his body, as well as the very female attributes pressing against him, became caught up in the heat of the moment and returned the kiss with just as much as he was receiving.  
  
The kiss opened the gates and began releasing ten years of stored up passion. Soun lost himself in the embrace. It was the first time in over a decade that he had acted like a man with a woman. Basking in the feel of her lips, the warmth of her body, the intoxicating scent of her ardor, it was like he had died and gone to heaven. He never wanted the feeling to end.  
  
Hinako broke off the kiss, and it was all Soun could do to not force her lips back to his again.  
  
She continued holding him close. She all but breathed, "There's a motel nearby. Why don't we go there and spend the entire night?"  
  
Soun felt his heart nearly seize up at what the gorgeous, voluptuous woman before him was asking. Almost automatically, he said yes, for there were other yearnings beyond kissing he wanted to experience again. But there was one thing stopping him, one thing forcing him back to reality. "I... can't. I'm sorry." They were some of the hardest words he had ever spoken. He didn't even want to say them, not really. But he had to. There was no choice in the matter. It was the way of things.  
  
His waited for the slap to the face. Or the protests. Or the tears. Or the cold glare and cursing that would follow his rejection. Instead, Hinako moved her head close to his and whispered in his ear, "I'll wait until you're ready. I'll keep waiting until that day."  
  
She didn't say anything else. She released her hold, looked upon him fondly, then turned and headed in a direction away from his home.   
  
Soun watched her leave, wanting to say something, but knowing it would do no good. It felt like something important, integral to him, was leaving. He knew he should stop her. He knew he should give in to what they both wanted. But at the same time he still couldn't, and instead was stuck with his quasi-half-life once again.  
  
He was such a detestable man.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
It was past midnight by the time Soun forced himself to return to his home. He had tried going out to a bar to drown his sorrows and trick himself into thinking he had done the right thing, but he had no desire to taste alcohol. So instead he walked around Nerima, alone, just like he had been in so many ways since his wife died. His life, as defined by others, was exclusively that of 'father', and with the return of Saotome, 'friend', but only with a woman could he become 'lover' again. He had a chance tonight, but he turned it away, and no amount of drink could convince him otherwise.   
  
Soun was more miserable than he had been for years. It was made all the worse because just hours earlier he had been the happiest he had felt in years. Falling from a height was so much worse than falling from a ditch. Things could not have turned out worse than if they had been planned that way from the beginning.  
  
Soun had already rejected the company of someone he wanted; he wanted no others whose attention he desired even less, around him either. He walked around in aimless circles until the others in his household would be asleep. Waiting until it was well past midnight, he walked by his home. No lights were on, so he hoped for the best as he entered, heading directly toward the living room. Sleep would not come for a while, and he did not want to be in cold bed alone now. It was too appropriate for what he felt.   
  
Soun left the lights off, preferring the cold comfort darkness afforded him. It matched the feeling in his soul. So he sat in dark silence, wondering why everything that should have been so right felt so wrong instead.  
  
He became aware of the presence a second before it entered the room. He said, "Not tonight, please," just as Kachiko entered.  
  
Instead of leaving, she sat down opposite him across the table. "That bad, huh?"   
  
For the first time in over ten years, Soun felt anger toward his wife. Or the memory of her. It was hard to differentiate the two with the recent turn of events. "You're the last person I can speak to of this."   
  
Kachiko pondered that. "Yeah, I can see that. Okay, I'll leave." She rose and headed for the doorway. Just as she was about to leave, she turned and said in soft tones, "Look, let's say for the sake of argument I did end up married, and raised a family, and I loved my husband with all my heart, and I died young. Even if all of that happened, I would never, ever, have wanted anyone left behind to mourn me for too long. Ten years is way more than enough. Five years is the max, even with how unforgettable I am. After that, it's time to move on. Only one person died, not two, and to behave otherwise is only to belittle everything that was shared between them. Love is supposed to make a person better than they can be on their own, but it shouldn't destroy what was there to begin with. If it does, then it wasn't really love at all, but a convenient obsession. No matter what happened to me, what kind of misery and problems I'd go through, I'd never be like that, and I don't think you're that sort of person either. I'm going to bed now." True to her word, she left.  
  
Soun remained where he was, in the darkness, the words echoing in his mind. Tears began pouring down his face as he felt something laid to rest within in his breast. Those were Kachiko's words, even if the girl that had just spoken them wasn't the real Kachiko. Or at least his 'Kachi'. Nor was she ever going to be. She was only the potential to be the woman he had loved, but that was irrelevant; he wasn't a possible suitor to her now the way he had been back when they had first met.   
  
His wife, his real wife, had changed him into something else when they had met. It had been that way for years, transforming him even as he transformed her. Now, that time had come and gone, never to return. Kachiko was dead. He had mourned her passing for an eternity, and tonight, Hinako made him realize he had grown tired of the perpetual mourning in solitude. But he couldn't let it go, not until she spoke the words and made him understand the truth he was unable admit to himself, and no one else could convince him with. Now, the weight that had been breaking his back for so long was gone. He felt like a new man with a future that he could call his own, rather than a bystander watching the world go by. For all the relief, there was a touch of sadness at the passing of an era, but it was outweighed by the knowledge that it was time to move on.   
  
When the sun eventually crested the horizon and filled the room with yellow light, it was a new day dawning in more ways than one. But it wasn't really a surprise.   
  
Absolution made everything better, after all.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
[END NOTES]  
  
Special thanks to:  
  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
  
The Apprentice  
  
Max M.  
  
Christopher Horton  
  
David Tai  
  
Michael A. Chase 


	17. The Things We Wish For Chapter 14

The Things We Wish For...  
  
Chapter 13  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/d_b_sommer/index.html  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing fics, at   
  
http://www.hostultra.com/~AngCobraFics/dbsommer.html  
  
At fanfiction.net:  
  
http://www.fanfiction.net/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
  
http://www.fanworks.org  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
More excited than he had been for months, Ranma squared off against his opponent for what would be the final and deciding conflict. After months of deception, evasion, and outright cowardice, he had trapped his foe, affording his opponent no path of escape.  
  
"It's ten o'clock already. I want to get this over with and get to bed," Kachiko yawned for emphasis.  
  
It was a trick of some sort, everything was when it came to her. But he had gotten her to agree to one last sparring match in exchange for willingly going on a date with the intention of having a good time. It was an incredible sacrifice on his part, but as his father always said, the path of the martial arts sometimes required sacrifices.  
  
"Let's get a move on here."  
  
Dating was one of the worst things he could do. It only led to a host of irate people, including romantic interests, parents, and even total strangers. At least it didn't seem as though Kachiko would be any making any demands of him, beyond him trying to make it a good time for both of them. The upcoming date could have been much worse, as past experience had taught him.  
  
"You're internally soliloquizing, aren't you?"  
  
If anything, it was the exact opposite, as Kachiko had laid a set of specific ground rules beforehand, rules that expressly prohibited him from trying anything, not that he wanted to, of course. But it implied she would not be engaging in such behavior either. There was a reassurance in that.   
  
"You are. Great. Just !#$% great."  
  
And there was one other problem bothering him like few things ever had. Kachiko had the audacity to compare him to Kunou. No, worse. She said Kunou was better than him. It was as inconceivable as snow in July, or talking his way out of a fight. He could not rest knowing someone believed in such a boldfaced lie. He had to set her straight and prove he was the manlier of men. For if Kachiko thought Kunou was better than him, who else might come to believe the same thing? No, this was a problem that had to be settled now, before it grew out of control, like a contagious disease, or Happosai with unlimited access to women's undergarments.  
  
That would be dealt with later. Right now there was something more important to worry about; finally showing Kachiko conclusively who the more talented martial artist was. Everyone else in the house was asleep, and Ranma had nailed the doors to the dojo shut, ensuring there would be no outside interference. This time it would be a clean one-on-one battle with the winner being permanently declared the better martial artist while the loser would be just another defeated foe. Ranma trembled in excitement at the opportunity to finally show his superiority.  
  
Ranma went into his standard attack stance. "All right. I'm read... Hey!" he shouted at the girl who was now resting in a curled up position on the floor with her eyes closed.  
  
Maintaining his distance, wary of a trap from such a tricky foe, he shouted, "Wake up!"   
  
Kachiko's eyes fluttered open. "So, finally done with your mental rambling and ready to fight?"  
  
"I was not mentally rambling and I'm always ready for a fight. And remember your promise. No tricks this time, got it?"  
  
"I got it, I got it." Kachiko stretched out, raising her arms above her head as she yawned. For just a moment, the belt on her gi loosened, allowing an opening of flesh starting with her neck down to slightly below the center of her chest to show. It displayed the fact that she was choosing to fight without a shirt or bra underneath her uniform.  
  
The sight made Ranma slightly uncomfortable. Undoubtedly that was the exact reaction Kachiko had been hoping for. Luckily, he had come up with the perfect counter of his own, one that had worked every time he had used it..   
  
Kachiko took on a more serious demeanor as she matched Ranma's own stance. "Are you ready?"  
  
"Let's do it." Eager to end things, Ranma ran forward to attack.  
  
Kachiko responded by turning around and running in the opposite direction.  
  
"Hey, you can't do that!" Ranma shouted as he began chasing after her.  
  
"Sure I can. I like to refer to it as the Tendou School of Martial Arts Ultimate Defense: Strategic Relocation."  
  
"All you're doing is running away."  
  
"From someone stronger and slower than me: the ideal situation to employ Strategic Relocation." Kachiko maintained her speed.   
  
Well, Ranma mused, it wasn't like The Saotome School of Anything Goes didn't have its own version of that 'defense'. Luckily, despite being slower, they were in an enclosed space, and in the time it would take for Kachiko to crack open the door or destroy a wall, Ranma would be upon her.   
  
Kachiko must have come to the same conclusion as she suddenly stopped and reversed direction, running backward and lashing out with an elbow toward Ranma's head.   
  
He ducked under the blow, but Kachiko having anticipated the evasion, suddenly went low, spinning and lashing out with her leg. She caught Ranma with a leg sweep and knocked him off his feet. She tried following up with an axe kick into his stomach, but Ranma had barely hit the floor before springing back up and out of the way of the blow. The kick broke several floorboards.  
  
Her lack of restraint irked Ranma. He was holding back rather than risk hurting the time-lost girl, both for his own peace of mind as well as to avoid incurring the wrath of the Tendous. Though even with him holding back, the outcome still wasn't in doubt. Not this time.  
  
Since she had chosen to close the distance, Ranma was not going to allow her to run from him again. He immediately went on the offensive with a flurry of punches aimed for various disabling areas of her body.   
  
Much to his surprise, Kachiko deflected or evaded the blows, some by only the slimmest of margins. He increased his speed, but she managed to keep up with him, though it was taking obvious effort on her part. As frustrating as his inability to land a clean blow was, to his trained eye he perceived that the only reason she could keep up was because she was putting everything into defense, while he was holding slightly back in case of retaliation on her part. Still, it was something of a revelation that she could defend herself so well. She might not have been anywhere near as strong as him, or as skilled, but she possessed superior reflexes. It made things challenging.  
  
"Not bad," Ranma tried distracting her with his talk, but Kachiko didn't rise to the bait, and remained silent as she continued blocking his rain of blows.  
  
The stalemate continued for nearly an entire minute before Ranma felt the first burning sensation of exhaustion set in. He could still fight for a while, but his attacks would become progressively slower as the match wore on. Kachiko was breathing hard, but still remained as fast as ever. Concerned she would flee at the first sign of an opening, or worse, come up with some trick to remove her from the fight altogether, Ranma used the plan he had concocted to counter her trickiness and defeat her.   
  
Ranma let a smile creep across his features, one that came surprisingly easy despite its premeditation. "It's funny. I never realized it until now, with us fighting like this, but that look of concentration on your face actually makes you looks cute."  
  
For just a moment, Kachiko hesitated. That was the only opening Ranma needed. He snared one of her wrists and jerked her toward him, knocking her off balance. He pulled her past his body and sidestepped, allowing her to trip over his extended leg while keeping a firm grip on her arm as she struck the floor. It was all over at that point; Ranma had both superior strength and leverage. Within seconds he was sitting on the small of her back, twisting both her arms behind her back and muscling them high enough to prevent her from breaking out of the hold.   
  
"Give up?" Ranma offered.  
  
Kachiko snarled once. An increase in pressure changed it to a squeal. "Fine, I yield."  
  
"Who's the better fighter?"  
  
"You are."  
  
"That sounded good. I want to hear it again."  
  
"You are, oh great and invincible martial artist. Now get off my back before I get really mad!"  
  
Ranma did as she requested and leapt into the air, shouting in glee at his triumph. After celebrating for several minutes with his 'Happy Martial Artist' dance, he threw open the doors to the dojo, ripping the boards nailed over them off, and raced into the house as he continuously chanted how he was the better man.  
  
Kachiko rubbed her sore arms, staring at where Ranma had exited the dojo. Despite her contention, she did not seem angry, but rather perplexed, and perhaps a touch distressed.  
  
"Did he mean it when he called me cute?"  
  
She was left without an answer.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
It was not until the next day, after a restless night with little sleep, that Kachiko considered ripping Ranma's lips off his mouth for causing her such grief. It was curious, and more than a little annoying. All it had taken was him saying a single compliment and turning her into a downward spiral of uncertainty and confusion. It didn't make sense. Guys had called her cute before. Lots of them, and some of them had been cute too. Kunou complimented her continuously and in much more flowery language when he was in her presence, and on a basis strictly of looks, he was more handsome than Ranma (though not by much). So why was it when Ranma said something as simple as calling her 'cute' it made her feel warm inside?  
  
Of course, it might have been nothing more than an attempt to throw her off her game and lose the match, which it had done. She would have tried the same thing if she thought it would work. Maybe Ranma had finally learned to be shifty. Actually, she was certain the timing of the remark was to do precisely that. But that wasn't what was really troubling her. 'Was he sincere?', that was what she was concerned about. Just because he had been opportunistic didn't mean he was lying.  
  
The more she thought about it, the more she thought Ranma meant what he had said. He didn't seem like the type that could lie that casually, or convincingly. He was a terrible actor on the few times she could recall him trying to pretend to be something he wasn't. But there was no strain or hesitation when he called her cute. It was as natural as saying she had black hair. So that meant he was being honest. Probably.  
  
But why did it matter? Why did his words affect her more than Kunou's? Maybe it was because they meant more, since he never spoke that way. One of Kunou's more distinctive traits was a glib tongue that passed out praise freely. He made the same flattering comments about Akane and some pig-tailed girl he had the hots for as he did about Kachiko. While she enjoyed the flattery, it wasn't as though it was exclusively meant for her, which made it less important. While she felt appreciated, his words hadn't made her heart flutter or cheeks warm the way Ranma's had.  
  
"Stupid jerk," she grumbled to herself. They hadn't even gone out on a date yet, and she was not fixated on him they way she had been on Bosatsu. There was no way he should have been able to make her react this way. She didn't care for it. Not one little bit. Guys were supposed to jump when women said jump, not the other way around. She wanted Ranma reacting to her flattery, not her reacting to his. She wanted to control the direction of the relationship, if they were going to have one, which she had not decided yet since they hadn't even gone on a date to see if there was any chemistry between them. Now Ranma had thrown the whole plan out of whack with his stray compliment, which might not have even been a sincere one. It made her angry.  
  
Kachiko wondered if there were any other girls that found Ranma as alluring and annoying at the same time as she did.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma hummed to himself as he prepared for his date. Not that he was looking forward to the date, but he was still delighted at his victory and Kachiko telling everyone in the home that he was the better martial artist. It felt wonderful putting everyone's doubts regarding that to rest. The two fluke victories Kachiko had managed (the third match not being a loss for him no matter what Kachiko claimed) were just that. Ranma's superiority had been assured in both thought and deed, and he found himself happier than he had been in months. Even having to go out on a date couldn't foul his mood. He'd probably manage to have a good time, and if things started to bring him down, he'd make Kachiko admit he was the better man again to boost his morale.   
  
He had already picked out what the suit he would wear, an 'engagement gift' given months ago by the two pushy fathers. He had also chosen what restaurant they would dine in (one he could afford), and made a reservation. All was ready to give Kachiko the time of her life.   
  
Ranma still felt good about himself when a knock on his door interrupted his reverie. He told the person, "Come in," as he finished buttoning up his shirt.  
  
Nodoka did so.   
  
"Hey, Mom, what's up?" Ranma asked distractedly as he adjusted his tie for the third time. He couldn't seem to center it, and he wanted it to appear perfect for the date.   
  
Rather than answering at first, Nodoka closed the door behind her. Ranma finally took note of her. She looked like a prisoner about to walk to the gallows, or his father being forced to admit he did something shifty. "What's wrong?"  
  
Nodoka walked further into the room until she stood next to her son. She cleared her throat. "I realize that tonight you are going on an official date with that... girl, who could potentially be your... fiancee... someday."  
  
So it was the engagement thing again. The way just about everyone other than Kachiko brought it up was annoying Ranma to no end. "It's just a date. We aren't talking about getting engaged or anything like that."  
  
"Thankfully," Nodoka muttered. "You should really, really take your time regarding the engagement. Don't rush into any decisions. You have all the time in the world. Don't think just because you're dating her that's any reason to get engaged to her. Please."   
  
"I keep telling you it's just a date. She's made it real clear from the beginning she's not interested in getting engaged to anyone for a long time, and that includes me." Which was one of the reasons the date wasn't as troubling as it could be.  
  
"Yes, well, it would be best that a... situation does not arise that would force an engagement, so here." She thrust a small packet that had been hidden in her hands toward Ranma.   
  
It took Ranma a second to identify the condom. "Just what in the hell am I supposed to do with that thing?!"  
  
Nodoka rolled her eyes. "Didn't your father teach you anything? Very well, first you tear open the wrapper then remove it. Then unroll it on your-"  
  
"I know how it works!" Ranma interrupted before the conversation went one word further. "What I mean is I don't need something like that on my date."  
  
Nodoka's gaze took on a burning light. She dominated Ranma's vision as she drew herself up to her full height. "That's the exact sort of attitude that leads to unwanted complications! I will not be questioned on this decision, young man! You are my son. You will be taking this with you on your date if I have to put it on myself!"  
  
Ranma's stomach recoiled at the very idea. Sensing his mother would try to follow through on the threat, he accepted the item and put it in his pocket.  
  
"That's better," Nodoka said, the majority of her anger dissipating. "Now you're prepared for your... date. Remember, don't take any chances." It was much a threat as it was a warning. Her task completed, Nodoka exited the bedroom and shut the door forcefully behind her.  
  
Staring at the door, Ranma gulped nervously. It was as though the condom weighed a thousand pounds and threatened to tear a hole through his pocket. He couldn't believe his mother was encouraging him to do... that with Kachiko. While he knew she demanded he be manly, he thought she disliked the time-lost girl. It was confusing.   
  
Worse, he didn't want to imagine how Kachiko would react if she caught him with something like that in his pocket. She had made the 'no getting to second base' rule clear, which suited Ranma just fine. But if she discovered he had come on a date with something that was intended to be used to 'go for home', he'd be lucky if she didn't go ballistic and forcibly remove the anatomical feature that the condom was designed for.  
  
"Why does it seem like every time my life gets better, something else makes it worse?" he grumbled.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Soun Tendou sat in his bedroom, looking through a photo album perched on his lap. It was the first time in over a decade he could bring himself to pore through the pictures and feel good about them. Normally he would break down and weep over each one. In many ways, it was though he was looking at them for the first time. There were so many joyful images of the past, and it was a good past. It had been a happy life, and worth remembering in a way that warmed the heart rather than tearing it apart. How could he have been so blind and foolish for so long?  
  
He was smiling at a picture of his wife and the girls playing in the nearby park, remembering that day well, when the door to the room burst open and Kasumi entered.  
  
"Father, we have to move quickly!" Kasumi urged.  
  
Soun immediately shut the album and placed it aside. To see Kasumi panicked meant something terrible must be happening. "What is it?"  
  
"Ranma is going to try to date Mother tonight. We must stop him. I already have the perfect plan." She pulled out a brown, unmarked bottle. "I'll offer to feed Ranma some special cookies. They'll be laced with this mild poison that will make him too sick to go. Then you can step in and offer to take mother out instead."  
  
Soun shook his head. "Kasumi, we can't do that."  
  
"Do you think we should use laxatives instead? I wasn't as confident about using those, since it might take too long to affect him, and he would be all right in between visits to the bathroom. Although I suppose it would be less cruel to him."  
  
"We cannot do that either."  
  
"I'll distract him while you knock him out from behind?"  
  
Soun rose to his feet and walked to Kasumi. He placed his hands affectionately on her shoulders. "No, Daughter. We aren't going to interfere in any way."  
  
Kasumi looked heartbroken. "Oh Father, don't tell me you've given up. I just know Mother will come to her senses and realize you're the only one for her."  
  
Soun gave a smile accompanied by a slightly sad laugh. "Kasumi it's not that simple. Kachiko, the one that is currently living in our house, is not your mother."  
  
A touch of fear laced Kasumi's voice. "Of course she is. I mean, I know she's young, but she's her. I can tell by some of the things she does. And you recognize her. And she admits to who she is. She's our mother."  
  
"She's no more a mother than you are," Soun informed his eldest daughter. "She's the girl that has the potential to be your mother, but that's all it is. Potential. She might be similar to your mother, which makes it hard to differentiate sometimes, but she isn't her."  
  
"She is," Kasumi contended, voice cracking ever so slightly.  
  
Soun tried being firm, yet comfort his daughter at the same time. "She's never given birth to anyone. She is not the woman in your memories. She's not the woman that raised you and showered you with affection and helped make you into the wonderful young woman you are today. Your mother is dead."  
  
"She's right here, living in Akane's room. She's the second chance we need to have Mother back!" Kasumi insisted.  
  
"She is not," Soun said in a tone that left no room for argument. "She's her own person. She's Kachiko Tendou, a rambunctious teenage girl who's been torn out of her time and put here among us. She is not the second coming of your mother, Kasumi. I know you miss your mother, I still miss her too, and so do Akane and Nabiki, but you have to let go. You can always honor and cherish her memory, but you have to move on beyond her. It's what she would have wanted."  
  
Tears began to fill Kasumi's eyes. "But it's not fair. I want her to be Mother so we can do all the things we never had a chance to do."  
  
"She's not the person you want her to be," Soun insisted. "Even if somehow she were to change like that, it would be because she wants to, not because you do. It was like that when you were born. Kachi didn't act like a mother because I made her, it was because she wanted to love and raise you. The girl with us now has made it clear she has no desire to act the role of your mother, which she is currently ill-suited for. You must stop trying to force her to behave that way. You'll only earn her resentment, and I know you don't want that."  
  
Kasumi couldn't respond. She simply began to weep.  
  
Seeing how the words were making his daughter break down, Soun embraced Kasumi, trying to comfort her as best as he could. "Believe me, I know what you're going through. For the longest time I felt exactly the same way. But recently I've come to the realization, no, the acceptance, that your mother is gone and she is never coming back. She was the world to us, and justifiably so. But while we keep her in our hearts, we must honor her memory and move on. Our lives did not stop on the day she died. They might have been slowed down for a while, but not stopped. It would be shameful, and she would never forgive us if we were to continue wallowing in misery over her absence. She would want us to move on, beyond what we were, and to continue living life to the fullest, just as we did when she was here at our side."  
  
Kasumi stared at Soun through tear filled eyes. "But it's not fair. I thought we had a wish that came true. I want her to be Mother so much."  
  
Soun continued embracing his daughter. "I did too, but even if she was to wake up one day and start behaving like we want her to, she still wouldn't really be your mother. She still wouldn't be my wife. Only the woman who went through the exact same experiences your mother did could be that, and this young girl has not. Nor would your mother want her to pretend. We have to let the past go, so we can move forward to the future. And we have to let Kachi, no, Kachiko," he corrected himself. "Live life as she wants to while she's here. If she wants to date Ranma, well, it does make for an awkward situation, but we have to respect her wishes."  
  
Kasumi continued sobbing for a while, letting the tears flow down her cheeks. After a handful of minutes, the sobbing slowed down, the stopped as her form seemed to firm up. She wiped the tears from her eyes and looked up to her father. "I suppose you're right. I think I've known it since she and I went out that night drinking and doing other things."  
  
"I'd rather you didn't remind me of that," Soun said, uncomfortable at the memory of the state Kasumi had returned in that night.  
  
Not sensing the effect her words were having, she continued. "I enjoyed myself, spending time with her, and dancing with those boys was fun. I haven't done anything like that in a very long time, if ever. It was fun cutting loose like that."  
  
"Ah, yes." Soun suddenly found his words about 'going forward' coming back to haunt him as Kasumi spoke of doing exactly that in her reminiscing about drinking and interacting with men. Of course, she was nineteen and entitled to do engage in such behavior, but it didn't mean he had to like it.  
  
After dwelling on her enjoyable time, Kasumi turned the conversation back to its original topic. "But what I was trying to get at is it wasn't the sort of thing I would ever have done with Mother, and I think I knew it. I mean, she's so much like Mother in some ways that it was sort of like I'm with her, but at the same time it's not."  
  
"I know what you mean," Soun agreed.   
  
"I suppose you're right," Kasumi finally decided. "I should let her do what she wants instead of trying to make her into what I want. But, it's difficult. I'd rather have Mother back than just having a friend, and an erratic one at that."  
  
"Yes, it is," Soun said. "But we'll manage to get by. Understanding the truth of the matter is the first, and most important, step. Once we manage that, the rest will be easier to deal with."  
  
"Yes, Father," Kasumi said with a touch of remaining melancholy.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma stared at the packet in his hand, the item primarily responsible for ruining what had previously been a good mood. He deftly rolled the object between his fingers wondering why it being 'ribbed and lubricated' was for a woman's pleasure. While he knew how the things worked, he wasn't aware of the finer details involved with their design. His opinion on the subject of prophylactics was that he didn't need them since he wasn't going to engage in the behavior that would necessitate having one. End of discussion. Now he found himself thrust into a situation that was almost surreal, thanks to his mother's bizarre behavior.  
  
He grunted in annoyance, pondering what to do with it. The best thing would be to throw it out, but if his mother asked to see it and the packet wasn't with him, there was no telling what she might do. She might even make him wear one for the entire evening!  
  
Ranma was considering running the risk and tossing it in a wastebasket when the door to the room was thrown open. Reflexively he hid the packet in his pocket, hoping whoever had barged in hadn't seen it. When he identified the intruder as an angry Akane, he prayed twice as hard he was quicker than her eye could follow.  
  
For a moment, Akane's eyes focused on the hand hidden in his pant's pocket. Then she turned her angry gaze from it to Ranma himself. "Is what Nabiki said true? Are you going out on a date with my mother?"  
  
"Well, yeah," Ranma said, hesitantly. Judging by the look on Akane's face, she was mad as hell. It was times like this he wished he had less pride and could run for it. Or had a terrible direction sense like Ryouga. Becoming lost could only help his current situation.  
  
The answer only made Akane angrier. "I've had enough of this. It's time to stop this nonsense once and for all. I forbid you from going out with her!"  
  
Rather than back off or become apologetic, Ranma's own gaze narrowed. "Where do you get off telling me what to do?"  
  
The retaliatory anger did nothing to assuage Akane's own. "Because you are my fiancé. Mine! You have no business fooling around with someone like her, or anyone else, for that matter!"  
  
Ranma dug in even harder. "And you think that gives you the right to tell me what to do and who I can hang around with and anything else. You think you can lord it over me like I'm your pet or something? Well I got news for you, I am not your fiancé at the moment. I'm not anyone's fiancé. I am my own man for the first time in a long time, and I happen to like it that way. I got no intention of being engaged to anybody for a good long while."  
  
"Even me?" Akane said bitterly.  
  
Ranma threw his hands up in frustration. "Aren't you listening? It's 'even everyone'. Why do you keep trying to make it sound like it's all about you? It's not always about you. Sometimes it's about me, and this is one of those times."  
  
"You were ready to marry me once," Akane said, her voice somewhat more subdued.  
  
"I was knocked out and others dressed me up and took me to the chapel. I think it's safe to say that whole thing was not my idea. I was still messed up from Saffron, you nearly dying, and the springs getting screwed up. It wasn't exactly the best time for me."  
  
"Then you're saying you don't want to get married?" Akane said, the anger returning.  
  
Ranma felt like screaming at the top of his lungs. "I'm saying I don't want to get married now! I'm tired of everyone trying to push me into things I don't want to do. Even my mom's starting to do it. You used to be different, but now you're acting just as bad as everyone else."  
  
"Except Kachi?" Akane asked bitterly.  
  
Ranma shook his head. "Nah, she does it too, but at least she lets me know how far she's trying to push me, and it's not that far, really. It's a heck of a lot less than anyone else is trying, even you, now."  
  
The anger returned a threefold. "So you're saying she's better than me?!"  
  
"No-" Ranma tried to explain, but was cut off before he could manage more.  
  
"It's because of her, isn't it?! It's all that damned Kachi's fault you're acting this way! You used to be better behaved and not act like such a jerk, but now you're worse than ever! She's been making you think stupid things and interfering in matters that don't concern her, like calling off the engagement and trying to seduce you! I hate her! I wish she'd never come into our lives!"   
  
"I'm not getting seduced by no one and it's not her fault," Ranma insisted. "I'm doing this stuff because I want to do it, which is the exact opposite of people making me do it."  
  
"Fine," Akane said in a low, hiss, and exited the room, slamming the door shut behind her hard enough to cause it to crack.  
  
Ranma stared helplessly at the door. He hated seeing Akane worked up like that and wanted to calm her down, but it was obvious she would only get angrier if he tried explaining things to her again. And he was more than a little mad at her for her own self-centered attitude. Why couldn't she give him the space he wanted? Why did she have to try to force herself on him now, just when he was starting to get a little breathing room? Well, she was going to have to adjust. He'd give her time to cool off and try again later, when she might actually be willing to listen to him.   
  
And if she didn't listen, well, then that was her fault, not his. He was trying his best. He knew he was. It was time for other people to make adjustments for his well being, rather than theirs. Akane included.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
It was a quiet and somber Ranma that made his way downstairs, the issue with Akane still bothering him. She'd get over it, of course, like she always did. Although there was something bothering him about their arguments of late. They seemed more serious rather than stemming from the usual misunderstandings. They'd just have to work through it. But that was for later. Right now, he had to live up to his word and take Kachiko out on her date.   
  
At least he didn't have any concerns that she would turn all serious and argue with him, or try anything untoward. There was a reassuring feeling in her constant litany of "Don't try anything funny or you'll be sorry" on their date. It was the first time he had been given a set of ground rules in his dealings with a person. If only everyone else in his life did the same, then he could relax.   
  
Ranma found Kachiko waiting for him in the entryway to the house, ready to leave. She was dressed in a sedate white and blue dress that accentuated her inherent cuteness, at least in Ranma's eyes. He had been slightly uneasy wondering if she would choose something more risqué, like that small red dress she wore that night they had gone out to dine at the Indian restaurant. Seeing her clothed that way had made him uncomfortable. It was odd, since he couldn't recall seeing someone dressed in such an outfit making him feel that way before. Luckily, Kachiko hadn't tried anything, and once they settled down to eat, things went well with the two talking and having a general good time. He hoped she would behave herself like that again so that things went smoothly. If she tried anything tricky, like Shampoo had during the time he went on a date with her for the Instant Nannichuan, it would ruin everything.  
  
Maybe it would be best to reaffirm their agreement. He said to Kachiko, "Remember, the deal is you don't try no funny stuff, like trying to make me engaged to you or something."  
  
Kachiko, who had seemed somewhat distracted, focused on Ranma, her eyebrows forming a 'V' of annoyance. "This is our first date. Try going any further than that, and you'll be the one who ends up feeling sorry. The way you keep harping on it makes me think you might be up to something. Maybe we should call this off and I'll go out with Tachi-kun. He won't keep trying to talk himself out of trying to do something perverted with me on a date. And he knows how to impress a girl too, I bet," she said under her breath.  
  
Once again the suggestion that an idiot like Kunou could one up Ranma in anything, especially when it came to women, raised his ire. "Forget it. You're going out with me. I already made plans and everything. I personally guarantee this will be the most unforgettable date you've ever been on.." He grabbed her by the hand and dragged her out the door.  
  
They had only made it to the street when Kachiko said, "Holding hands within the first minute? My, you're certainly aggressive."  
  
Ranma realized what he was doing and released her hand, as though holding it a second longer would have resulted in third degree burns. "I didn't mean it like that."  
  
"I know you didn't. I just thought it would be cute to tweak you a little," she joked.   
  
The two began walking alongside one another at a less frantic pace. They were not so near one another as to suggest they were intimate, but neither did it imply only a casual acquaintance either. Ranma was aware of this, and relieved she didn't try getting too close by holding his arm or a similar romantic action.   
  
"So, what are our plans for this evening?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"Dinner and a movie," Ranma answered. Asking some of the guys at school for advice, they seemed to think that was a standard plan when going out on a 'first date'. That made sense to Ranma, and sounded agreeable. He didn't watch too many movies, and one had to eat no matter what. That way the time with Kachiko wouldn't be wasted no matter how things turned out.   
  
"Sounds good. Eating first?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"I was thinking afterwards." Besides, the semi-formal restaurant's reservation was booked for later in the evening. While he wasn't concerned about doing anything romantic with Kachiko, there was no way he'd look cheap compared to Kunou.   
  
As if on cue, a voice some distance from behind them shouted out, "Saotome, you cur, unhand that noble beauty!"  
  
Both of the people in question turned to see a tuxedo clad Kunou, bokken in hand, racing toward them.   
  
"I didn't call him to mess things up," Ranma told Kachiko, remembering their deal about trying to make the date go smoothly.  
  
"I didn't think you had."   
  
"I'm just making sure," Ranma said.  
  
By the time their exchange had finished, Kunou had caught up to them. He leveled his bokken accusingly at Ranma. "Foul sorcerer, how dare you weave your enchantments about this fair young maiden!"  
  
Kachiko turned to Ranma. "You know magic? That's cool. I never went out with someone who could do magic tricks. Can you pull a rabbit out of your pocket? How about the interlocking ring thing? I could never figure that one out. Or change water to wine? That would be really cool, and we could drink the stuff afterwards."  
  
Irked, Ranma said, "I don't know any magic. It's that idiot who got confused over my little changing problem with cold water. "  
  
"Oh," Kachiko said. "Well, that is magical, sort of. I'd rather know how the ring trick works, though."  
  
"Once again I order you to keep your churlish hands away from the beauteous Kachiko Tendou," Kunou reiterated.  
  
Before Ranma could speak, Kachiko said, "It's okay, Tachi-kun, we're just going out on a date. I asked him, actually."  
  
Kunou recoiled. "Never! I forbid this foul animal from engaging in such an act. He'll attempt lascivious and improper actions if left alone in your presence."  
  
"Then he'll end up doubled-over in pain from a couple of knees to the groin. Did you know the male scrotum can be driven into the pelvic bone about an inch or so?"  
  
Ranma and Kunou winced and crossed their legs.   
  
Ranma told her, "Even though I'm not going to do anything perverted, you're still really killing the atmosphere here."  
  
Kunou sneered at Ranma. "Enough. I forbid this travesty from taking place."  
  
"Since I'm not available tonight, just go out with Akane or that pig-tailed girl you keep going on about," Kachiko suggested. "I don't mind."  
  
"He can't do that!" Ranma said.   
  
Kachiko arched an eyebrow at that. "Oh? Have a crush on them too, do you?"  
  
"No!" Ranma exclaimed. "It's just Akane doesn't deserve to have him bothering her and the 'pig-tailed girl' is you know who." He pulled his pig-tail.  
  
Kachiko's eyes widened in disbelief. "Wait, you mean to tell me he doesn't know about your gender problem?"  
  
"I tried explaining it to him, but he refuses to believe it. I guarantee you, him harassing me over it makes me ill to my stomach."  
  
"I understand. Yumi tried to seduce me all the time." Kachiko patted Ranma sympathetically on the shoulder.  
  
"I cannot tolerate such an open display of affection!" Kunou declared.  
  
Kachiko evened things out by patting Kunou on the head in sympathy. He reacted joyfully to it, like any household dog would.  
  
"Better?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"I would date with you!" Kunou declared. He tried to embrace Kachiko, but she ducked out of the way, allowing him to hug a lamppost.  
  
Kachiko darted to Ranma's side. "Sorry, I'm with Ranma tonight, and while I openly admit to being a lot of girl to handle, dating two guys at once is too much. We can arrange something tomorrow."  
  
Ranma turned on her in irritation. "Hey, you're going to have such a good time tonight, you're going to forget all about him."  
  
Bokken at the ready, Kunou once again declared, "I shall not allow you to go out with Kachiko. Instead I shall dispose of you today and go out with her in your stead."  
  
Kachiko squirmed in delight. "Wow! My first official date here and I'm already being fought over."  
  
Ranma snapped, "Would you mind not encouraging him?!"  
  
"Fine, I'll date the winner," Kachiko said satisfactorily.  
  
"You will not. You're already on a date with me," Ranma stated in a firm tone even as Kunou loosened up by taking several practice swings with his bokken.  
  
Kachiko moved closer to Ranma and whispered in his ear, "It's obvious Tachi-kun's being overly possessive and not going to stop bothering us unless he gets beaten. Besides, I think we both know who's going to win this one."  
  
"Oh, okay." What she said made sense. It probably was the quickest way resolve the situation, and Kachiko knew Ranma was going to win, so it wasn't like she was hoping to date Kunou instead.  
  
"Have at you!" Kunou declared as he thrust his bokken toward Ranma's body.  
  
Ranma side-stepped the thrust and moved forward, striking Kunou in a flurry of punches and kicks, rendering him insensate within seconds.   
  
"The winner!" Kachiko declared, holding Ranma's arm up high.  
  
Ego satiated, Ranma said with a great deal of pride. "Come on, we're going to continue our date."  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
They arrived at the movie multiplex without further incident.   
  
Kachiko stared in awe at the number of titles on the marquee. "I can't believe they offer so many movies at just one place. Where, or more appropriately when, I come from you were lucky to get a choice of four."  
  
"Yeah, they got a lot more variety now." Which was part of the problem Ranma had as he looked over the titles offered. He had no idea what she would like. He decided the best approach would be ask his date. "Anything catch your eye?"  
  
Kachiko looked them over, scratching her head in confusion. She stopped scratching and shrugged. "Since you're the one paying, you go ahead and decide. Choose something you'd enjoy, I'm sure I'll like it as well."  
  
"Good." Ranma was relieved. The last thing in the world he wanted to see was some sappy romance movie. He had enough romantic intentions directed at him, and had no desire to watch someone else go through the same ordeal. Worse, the movie would always resolve the situation. He had made that mistake once in going to a movie with Akane. The ending, with the girl in the guy's arms and all the other problems resolved nicely in a happily ever after ending made Ranma stand up in the middle of the theater and shout, "Liar! It's never that easy!"   
  
It was the last time Akane let him go to the movies with her.  
  
Ranma finally chose a martial arts picture. Kachiko liked martial arts, and the two could laugh at how fake everything was. He walked up to the ticket counter and said to the girl behind it, "Two tickets for 'Tekken'."  
  
The girl looked at him curiously. She pointed to Kachiko. "Aren't you on a date with that girl?"  
  
"Um, yeah."  
  
The ticket girl gave a delighted smile. "Then you'll want something romantic. 'Boys Over Flowers' will do nicely."  
  
The title alone made Ranma feel nauseated. "No way."  
  
The girl's smile remained fixed in place. "It's an enchanting, romantic picture about the coming of age of a girl and the men in her life that start as her rivals, but end up falling for her. They're all so wonderful." She sighed and stared off in the distance.   
  
"I want two tickets for Tekken," Ranma insisted.  
  
"It'll give you ideas on how to act and treat a lady right," the girl said dreamily.  
  
"I don't want to see some sappy romance picture filled with a bunch of angsty bishonen guys mooning over some chick whose world revolves around which one she's interested in."  
  
"Have you ever thought of growing a little taller, losing some weight, and letting your hair grow out? Your girlfriend would be really turned on."  
  
"You're not listening to a word I'm saying, are you?"  
  
"Here are your tickets, Sir. She'll love it." She handed two to him.  
  
Ranma sighed helplessly and accepted the fact this was one fight he wasn't going to win. Shoujo fangirls were like a force of nature. One didn't defeat them; one survived them.  
  
As Ranma left, he heard the girl say to the next customer, "Hopeless computer geek, comic collecting loser? I'll get you one for 'Army of Darkness, Redux'."  
  
"Actually I want to see Karekano."  
  
"It won't do you any good. You're never going to land a girlfriend. It's Army of Darkness for you." There was the sound of a ticket being printed.  
  
This was the last time Ranma was ever coming to this theater.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Mikado Sanzenin looked deeply in the eyes of the girl before him. "So, my dear, did you enjoy the 'Marmalade Boy, revisited,' double feature?"  
  
The girl had a tear in her eye. She wiped at it as she sniffled. "It was so moving. I always cry when I see it."  
  
He drew her into his arms. "I knew you would. You're so much like Miki, I am overwhelmed with emotion."  
  
She stared deeply into his eyes, "And you're my Yuu."  
  
And with that he leaned down and kissed her. It seemed as though everything became hazy and flowers filled the air as she returned the kiss with just as much passion.  
  
Mikado broke off the kiss. She swooned in his embrace. "Let's go out to eat, and then return to my house where we can engage in deep and meaningful conversation."  
  
"I don't think so." Mikado released her, allowing her to stand on her own. He pulled out a pen and a small, but thick, black book from his suit's jacket pocket. He made a mark in it, saying to himself, "One thousand, one hundred and twenty five," then returned it to his pocket.  
  
Surprised by his suddenly aloof behavior, the girl said, "What's going on?"  
  
"I think we should stop seeing each other," Mikado said bluntly.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"We've already reached the kissing stage of our relationship. There's nowhere else to go from there."  
  
The girl trembled in fury. "You asshole!" She picked up a nearby trashcan and slammed it into his head before stomping off.  
  
"Breaking up is hard to do," Mikado waxed philosophically as he picked himself up from the ground. It was still early. He should have enough time to woo one more girl long enough to manage a kiss, then he would call it a night. He surveyed the lobby with his eyes until they fell on one girl in particular.   
  
Mikado pulled out a mirror and looked into it, making sure his teeth gleamed when he smiled. Satisfied, he was in proper form, he made his way to the girl with the short hair and slender figure who was looking over candy in the concession stand's display case.  
  
"You'll want to avoid the JuJubes. They would require carbon dating to determine how old they are," he said as he smoothly placed an affectionate arm around her shoulder.  
  
The girl's eyes narrowed as she turned to him. Suddenly they opened wide as she shouted, "Icky!" and proceeded to drive a powerful punch into his stomach.  
  
The air whooshed out of Mikado's lungs and he fell to the ground doubled over, unable to draw a single breath that didn't cause him pain.  
  
He was barely able to make out an, "Oh, I'm sorry. You reminded me a lot of some creepy pervert from my past, Icky Slutzenin, right down to the oily residue your groping hand leaves behind. By the way, you shouldn't grab women like that. It's only asking for trouble. And beatings. Lots and lots of beatings." Kachiko purchased a large tub of popcorn and left, stepping directly on Mikado's gut as she walked away.  
  
Mikado simply lay there, gasping for air. Maybe he would call it a night after all.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
As Kachiko approached, Ranma saw she was rubbing at something on the shoulder of her dress.   
  
"I, ah, got the tickets," Ranma said sheepishly.  
  
Kachiko gave up on the rubbing and sighed, turning her attention to Ranma. "What movie are they for?"  
  
Unable to force himself to repeat the name, Ranma offered them to her.  
  
Kachiko read the title. "Boys Over Flowers?" She looked at one of the nearby posters depicting the movie. It showed two boys kissing a surprised girl. "Ewww. They look bishonen. I hate girly boys like that. Do you honestly like movies like that? Because if you do, I don't think we should go out again."  
  
Ranma was almost childlike as he complained, "It was that ticket seller. She wouldn't give me the tickets to the movie I wanted."  
  
Kachiko sighed. "Fine. I'll do it. Let me get the tickets." She chided, "You've got to learn to be more firm. About the only thing you were adamant about was me giving you a rematch."   
  
Ranma watched as she walked over to the ticket seller. She saw Kachiko talk to the girl for a few minutes, then return, bearing two tickets in hand.  
  
Ranma managed to read the title that was sticking out from above her fingers. "What's 'Super Girls'."  
  
Kachiko's eyebrows twitched madly as she muttered, "She told me it was a movie that would make me feel good about being a woman despite my... demure, features."  
  
Ranma chided, "You've got to learn to be more firm. About-"  
  
"Just shut up and let's watch the movie," Kachiko insisted as she grabbed him by the arm and escorted him into the theater.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma and Kachiko were laughing so hard they had to keep leaning on each other for support. Passersby gave them a wide berth, most thinking the two were drunk, judging by their incoherent laughter and swaying as they made their way down the street.   
  
"God, that was the most pathetic thing I've ever seen!" Kachiko laughed hard.  
  
"Got that right. We ought to go back. I'm sure we missed half the movie with how hard we were laughing."  
  
"Then we can make fun of that stuff, too." Kachiko wailed in laughter again.  
  
As Kachiko leaned against him, Ranma had to admit, going to the horrible movie had turned into an entertaining experience. Not that the movie was any good, it was every bit as painfully bad as Ranma had expected, but Kachiko had found it equally unlikable, and was vocal about it. Ranma began agreeing with her, and the two ended up competing at who could mock the movie best. Their contest had made for a lot of angry stares by the other patrons of the film, mostly girls, but both he and Kachiko had too much fun to care what a bunch of shoujo fangirls thought.  
  
The two regained some measure of control as they made their way toward the restaurant. Both were smiling, enjoying the afterglow of the movie.   
  
"What time is our reservation for?"  
  
The sun had gone down. Ranma had to move under a streetlight to read his watch. "Hmm. We're running a little late. Why don't we cut through the park?" He pointed to a walkway that led into the park, though it was quickly obscured by the trees lining the path.  
  
Kachiko tensed up slightly. "You want to take me through the park at this time of night?"  
  
"Why not?" Ranma asked innocently.  
  
After a moment of consideration, Kachiko chuckled. "Yeah, knowing you, you probably don't have a clue."  
  
"Clue to what?"  
  
"Never mind. Lead the way." She waved him past her.  
  
Ranma did as she indicated, feeling perplexed and annoyed. Kachiko seemed to know something he didn't. She might have been playing a headgame with him to keep him off balance, but she seemed to want to have a good time on the date, and she wasn't like Nabiki, who would have tormented him just to entertain herself. Perhaps she was nervous about walking through a poorly lit area in the dark. There was always the possibility of being mugged, or more accurately, someone trying to mug them, since there was no chance someone like that could actually defeat him. Still, he'd keep an eye out for any trouble.  
  
They had only made their way a short distance through the park when Ranma's senses went on alert. He could feel the presence of people off the path hidden out of sight, a sure sign of trouble. So they had wandered into an ambush. Kachiko's suspicions were on target. He tensed up, waiting for someone to make the first move. While he was sure Kachiko could take care of herself, they were on a date, and it was his duty to protect her from any harm. It was the manly thing to do. Besides, if he let Kachiko do it, she'd brag about how she protected him, and that wouldn't do at all.  
  
They continued walking, Ranma wondering when the ambush would be tripped. He started to think the group was too scared to move when a rustling sound come from a set of bushes a small distance away. It was followed by a woman's gasp. So, they had already found a victim.  
  
"Stay here, I'll take care of this," Ranma told Kachiko and moved toward the bushes.  
  
Kachiko froze for a second, startled at his declaration. By the time she came out of it, he was already halfway there. "Wait, Ranma, I don't think you want to do that!"  
  
It was too late as he leaped over the bushes and said, "Hey, you creep! What are you doing to that girl? Get off her."   
  
There was the brief sound of a struggle, then a girl's voice screech, "Let go of my boyfriend!" followed by a slap.  
  
More slowly this time, Ranma walked out from the bushes, a red handprint on his cheek.   
  
"I told you you didn't want to do that," Kachiko teased in a sing-song voice.  
  
"How was I to know the park's a place to do perverted stuff at night?" Ranma grumbled.   
  
"I assumed that was why you wanted to come out here with me. I figured you were overcome with lust." Kachiko posed sexily for him.  
  
"I don't want to do anything perverted with you," Ranma said gruffly as he continued on through the park.  
  
Kachiko sniffed disdainfully. "You don't have to be so vehement about it." Her ire disappeared as quickly as it came, and she began following him once again.   
  
Walking hurriedly, the two left the park and emerged close to the restaurant Ranma had made the reservations at. Once free from the uncomfortable environment of the perverted playground the park transformed into at night, Ranma relaxed a little, though not completely. He had interrupted the couple in very intimate moment, with the girl in a compromising position. For some bizarre reason, since that encounter, he felt strange when he looked at Kachiko. A part of him wished he could end the date now and escape the cause of his reaction, while another part was reluctant to do so.   
  
It mattered little. He had promised to go out on a date, and Kachiko wanted to be here with him. He would live up to his obligation, and be done with it and never date her again, even if they were having a good time together. It just made things too complicated.  
  
They entered the restaurant, pleased to see no line. Ranma walked up to the podium that the maitre'd stood behind. "I have a reservation at 8:30 for Saotome."  
  
"I'll need your reservation number," the man said with an air of superiority that rubbed Ranma in the wrong way.   
  
Ranma thought the whole reservation number thing was stupid, but the person that had taken his reservation insisted he needed one. He reached into his pocket and pulled out what he thought was the folded over note and showed it to the man.  
  
"Getting lucky tonight, are we, Sir?" the maitre'd said drolly.  
  
Ranma stared in horror at the condom in his hand. He couldn't understand why Kachiko hadn't already slapped him for its presence. Cringing, he looked and noted her head was turned away as she examined one of the nearby paintings. However, she was turning back toward him.  
  
Lightning fast he thrust the item back in his pocket.  
  
Kachiko stared at him curiously. "What was-"  
  
Thinking fast, Ranma snapped at the maitre'd, "How dare you imply my date is a loose woman!"  
  
The maitre'd was taken aback. "I'm sorry, but I just assumed by your co-"  
  
Ranma reached forward and snared the man by the collar, dragging him halfway over the podium. "I demand you apologize to her for your unforgivable remark!"  
  
"Yeah, apologize for saying I'm sleazy," Kachiko seconded.   
  
The maitre'd babbled, "But I-"  
  
"What's going on here?" a large man dressed in formal attire, who had come from a nearby discussion with two waiters, demanded as the argument had drawn his attention.  
  
The maitre'd paled. "Sir, I can explain. I asked for this man's reservation number and he flashed me-"  
  
"He called my date a tramp!" Ranma interjected. "I demand an apology."  
  
"So do I," Kachiko seconded.   
  
"I see." The manager grabbed the maitre'd by the scruff of the neck. "Back to the kitchens and scrubbing for you, Kanzaki." To Ranma and Kachiko he said, "Please forgive his impertinence, he's my wife's brother. I'll see to it you receive a bottle of wine, compliments of the house, in apology."  
  
"Offering free booze is always the best form of apology," Kachiko said enthusiastically. She looped her arm through Ranma's. "I must say, Ranma, that was very noble of you to get so outraged and stick up for me like that. I'm impressed."  
  
"Ah, thanks." Ranma gave a nervous laugh. That had been a close one. He wondered how many more he'd have before the date was over.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Yes, alcohol makes everything better," Kachiko slurred slightly as she drained her glass for the sixth time in a half hour and set it back down on the table.  
  
"Ah, maybe you should slow down," Ranma said hesitantly.  
  
"Most guys want to get their dates drunk," Kachiko said slyly.   
  
"I'm not like most guys," Ranma stated with a touch of indignity.  
  
"Too true, too true. You're a perfect gentleman," Kachiko agreed. "Why, I bet if I was to give you a lap dance, you wouldn't try a thing. Want to find out?" She started to rise out of her chair.  
  
"No!" Ranma said quickly.  
  
Kachiko frowned. "You said that awful fast, like you didn't even think about it. Don't be so uptight. We did see each other naked, after all."  
  
Her slightly loud voice, as well as the topic, was attracting a great deal of unwanted attention. "It was an accident. I didn't mean to do it," Ranma explained as much to the other patrons as to her.  
  
"I know, I know, that's why I don't give you a hard time about it," Kachiko said. "That's one of the things I like about you. You let the gal set the pace. It's neat to meet a guy that wants to do that." Her voice then dropped. "Who knows, keep making all the rights moves like you have been tonight, and you might manage a double."  
  
Ranma was about to protest when Kachiko slouched in her chair. He couldn't understand what was going on until he felt a bare toe rub itself up and down his leg.  
  
Then there was a thud as Kachiko fell out of her chair. All Ranma could see of her was the top of her head.  
  
"My chair moved," she said from the floor.  
  
"Maybe you'd better cut back until the food arrives," Ranma suggested as politely as he could.  
  
"Probably," Kachiko agreed as she set her chair back up and sat down properly in it once again. "I usually don't get giddy like this unless I'm having a good time."  
  
"That's nice to know," Ranma said weakly, hoping the food would arrive soon so they could stop the increasingly uncomfortable conversation.  
  
Kachiko leaned forward over the table, then curled her finger, indicating Ranma should do the same. Reluctant to do so, but feeling not doing it would result in something worse happening, Ranma answered the beckoning digit.  
  
He leaned forward. "Yes?"  
  
Kachiko whispered, "I'll let you in on a secret. You're doing so good, you've now got the inside line on Tachi-kun."   
  
Ranma started to smirk. He was distracted enough that he didn't react before Kachiko brought her face closer and gave him a peck on the cheek.   
  
She retreated back to her seat before he could offer a word of protest. "Relax, I won't try for more than first base. I can tell I'm not the only one who wants to take things really slow."   
  
Ranma blushed furiously, unsure of what to say. Before he could formulate anything, Kachiko rose to her feet. "I have to use the ladies' room, which means the food should arrive the instant I'm out of sight."  
  
Ranma felt grateful for the reprieve. He sat back in his chair.   
  
As Kachiko began to pass by him, she leaned forward and whispered, "By the way, you're awful cute when you blush." Then left before he could say anything again.  
  
Ranma remained in his chair, too flustered to decide if the date was the worst he had ever been on, or the best.   
  
"Staying at home is definitely a lot less stressful." He drained a glass of wine himself as he tried to figure out which it was.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko observed herself critically in the mirror, uncertain if she was luring Ranma closer, or driving him away. Any other guy and she would have been sure it was the former. But Ranma had been right on target with his declaration that he was "not like most guys." It was one of his most endearing, as well as distracting, traits. There were times when the frustration of trying to anticipate his reaction was so bad she would just as soon be done with him save for one problem.  
  
She really liked it when he called her cute.  
  
"Idiot," she muttered under her breath.  
  
"I agree. Let's leave this loser so you can take up with a real man instead of the weenie fem-boy."  
  
Kachiko gasped as the sickening image of Tarou appeared in the mirror, directly behind her. Apparently she had been so caught up thinking about Ranma she had failed to notice the Chinese youth enter.  
  
She turned in anger upon him. "Look, you creep, at least Ranma isn't so sexually confused he'd enter a ladies room, and that's saying a lot since he turns into a girl. So why don't you make like a leaf and leave?"  
  
Tarou cringed. "That was just awful. We're really going to have to do something about that sense of humor of yours if there's going to be anything between us."  
  
"Ranma appreciates my sense of humor, and there's nothing between us!" While the former was a lie, there was no need for Tarou to know it. And the latter was definitely true.   
  
"Yes, well about that nothing between us bit." Tarou held up his left hand far out to his side and wiggled his fingers.  
  
Kachiko looked at them in confusion. "What the hell is that supposed to-"  
  
The rest was cut off as a hard right met Kachiko between the eyes. She teetered back, stunned. She was mentally scolding herself for falling for such an obvious ploy when a second blow knocked her unconscious.   
  
"Let's work on that, shall we?" Tarou hefted her unconscious form over his shoulder and exited the restroom.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma began to worry over how long it was taking Kachiko to use the restroom. A dozen different disaster scenarios ran through his mind, ranging from her passing out to being abducted.  
  
"Nah, I'm being silly," Ranma decided as he looked over his shoulder just in time to see Tarou head through the swinging doors to the kitchen with Kachiko slung over his shoulder.  
  
Ranma sighed. "It's never the easy way, is it?" At least he wouldn't have to worry about what Kachiko was going to try to do to him next. It was almost a relief that Tarou had ended things predictably.   
  
Ranma jumped out of his seat and ran toward the doors. He burst through them, knocking a waiter over as raced into the kitchen, looking for any sign of Tarou and his burden. He caught sight of his prey exiting through the back of the kitchen. Under different circumstances, catching up to Tarou would have been difficult, the creep was nearly as fast as Ranma, but with him lugging around Kachiko he'd be slowed down. Running him down would take a matter of moments.   
  
Despite being out of sight, it was easy to follow Tarou's trail by the number of fallen, irate people he left in his wake. Ranma burst out the rear doors to the restaurant and emerged into an alleyway. One end of it resulted in a dead end. He turned to look the other way, but there was no sign of Tarou there either, and given how far back the door was to the street, there was no way he could have run fast enough to get out of sight.  
  
Then Ranma looked up.  
  
"Shit!" he cursed under his breath as he saw Tarou's cursed form flying off with Kachiko cradled in his arms. He had forgotten that little detail. Suddenly the stakes went up, as the odds of Tarou kidnapping Kachiko successfully increased. And unlike the time Pantyhose had abducted Akane, this time Kachiko was the prize Tarou wanted. It was up to Ranma to catch Tarou and keep him from doing whatever terrible things he had planned for the girl he wanted so badly.   
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Deckhand Yoji Kimura watched as more the cargo was dropped in the hold by the crane. The men below decks released the hooks, allowing the cable that had been supporting the cargo to retract. Once finished, Yoji began to direct the next container into position.   
  
Just as Yoji finished bolting the last one into place, a huge form landed next to him on the deck of the freighter. He looked up at the bizarre collection of mismatched animal parts staring down at him from above. The creature carried a girl fast asleep in his arms.   
  
Yoji pulled out his radio and said, "Captain, a large beastie just landed on our deck."  
  
The radio crackled in response, "It's probably a dock inspector. Just bribe him to look the other way."  
  
The creature thrust a piece of paper in Yoji's direction. He looked it over. "Actually, he has a passenger ticket."  
  
The radio crackled a second time. "Even better, a paying customer. Show him where the passenger berths are."  
  
"He has an unconscious girl in his arms, though."   
  
"Don't go prying into other people's affairs. I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation for it."  
  
"He's abducting her?"  
  
"That sounds reasonable. Now show him to his room." The radio went dead.  
  
Yoji shrugged. He wasn't captain. If anything bad came of this, it wouldn't be on his head.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko first encounter upon awakening was a collision with a splitting headache. "Oh man, I must have had seriously way too much to drink." She went to rub her temple, but found her arms pinned to her sides. She was able to pivot her head just enough to look down and see she was securely bound in thick links of chain.   
  
It took her a moment to collect her muddled thoughts. What was the last thing she remembered? Ranma, the whip cream and... no, wait, that was the dream she had before awakening. No way was he that inventive with an ice cream scooper and hazelnuts. It was something else. She had gone to the bathroom, pondering the dilemma 'Mr. You Look Cute' presented her with when her ruminations had been interrupted by....  
  
"Hey, Babe. Nice to see you awake."  
  
The voice had come from the direction directly above her prone form. She turned to look up and snarled, "So it's you, Bull-butt. You sick pervert. You've tied me up so you can do twisted sexual things to me."  
  
"You're into that sort of thing?"  
  
"No way!"  
  
Tarou breathed a sigh of relief. "Good. As much as I love you, I'm not into bondage or kinky stuff like that. If you were, I'd have to rethink our relationship."  
  
"We don't have a relationship!"  
  
Tarou snickered. "Sure we do. It's love/hate right now, but it'll change over time, like all the cool romances do. There's the usual time period of denial on one or two of the people's parts. Then after we've shared some bonding experiences and stuff, we'll grow closer after our trials and tribulations and eventually proclaim our love for one another. That's what makes cool romances like that worthwhile."  
  
"That's a load of crap," she retorted, then took in her surroundings. Oddly, the ceiling had a number of metal crossbeams above her head. The metal of the floor felt cold, and she swore she could hear water lapping against something. Even the room seemed to have an odd sway to it. "Where are we?"  
  
"On a cargo ship bound for Tasmania. I have you stored in the back toward the engine, since my room is the first place anyone would look for you."  
  
There was the sound of something large breaking somewhere overhead.  
  
Tarou cracked his knuckles, making an unusually loud popping sound with them. "Sounds like one of those trials I mentioned just showed up. Don't worry, I'll take care of that pesky Fem-boy. No way I'll let a pansy like him come between me and true love."  
  
"Ranma will kick your ass!" Kachiko swore.   
  
"He hasn't been able to do it yet, not without help. And there's no way he had time to round up anyone, since we came directly to the ship. We'll be setting sail any minute now. So all I have to do is beat him up again and then we'll have nothing but each other left."  
  
"It'll never happen." Kachiko struggled against her bonds.  
  
Tarou shook his head sadly at the display. "Even I'd have a tough time breaking out of those, and you ain't anywhere near as strong as me. You just take it easy. I'll be back before you know it." Tarou headed up and out of the room.  
  
"Bastard!" Kachiko spat and filling the air with rattling as she tried to break free of her chains.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Where is she? You'd better cough Kachi up, or you'll be sorry!" Ranma bellowed to the rough looking men lining the deck of the ship. Although he had lost sight of Tarou, it was right around here. He knew this was the place the jerk had to have landed. It was the only ship in the area, and from the looks of the crew, they were preparing to leave the harbor.  
  
Yoji stopped directing the crane, which had picked up the last of their cargo, a fifteen by fifteen foot box container suspended above the deck, and moved to the front of the pack of irate crewmen. He brandished a crowbar menacingly in hand. "Now see here, kid. We don't like people coming onto our ship and making demands, at least if they aren't fifteen feet tall and look like a bull with wings. So why don't you shove off, or we'll make you sorry." He poked Ranma in the chest with the crowbar.   
  
Ranma poked him in the chest with a fist, which was actually closer to a punch. It knocked Yoji down to the deck and sent the sent flying out of his hand where it landed on the deck with a clang.   
  
That served as a signal for the rest of the crewmen to descend on Ranma, trying to gang tackle him all at once.   
  
Ranma finished the dozen large men off in under a minute.   
  
As the last, and largest, man went crashing unconscious to the deck, the sound of clapping filled the air. Ranma turned to see Tarou relaxing lazily against the forecastle of the ship.  
  
"Looks like you're all warmed up. Ready for the main event?" Tarou dramatically cracked his knuckles again, since Ranma hadn't had the benefit of hearing him do it earlier.  
  
Ranma stepped menacingly toward Tarou. "I can't believe you're sick enough to kidnap Kachi and try taking her away on a ship so you can have your way with her."  
  
Tarou looked aghast at the accusation. "I am going to do no such thing."  
  
"Then why'd you kidnap her and come here?"  
  
Tarou smirked. "I was saving her life. After all, anyone hanging out with you would die from terminal boredom. Right now she's lively and vibrant, but there's no telling how boring she'll get if she spends time with you. You are a pansy assed weenie boy, after all."  
  
"I am not!"  
  
Tarou continued. "And I have no intention of having my way with her. I'm simply taking her on a cruise with just the two of us. That we can have some privacy and get to know what each other's like. And, you know, fall in love and everything. But that comes after we spend some time with one another."  
  
Ranma scoffed. "Yeah, like that will ever happen. She doesn't even like you."  
  
Tarou gained a crafty smile. "Oh, from what I understand, most of the girls that are currently after you started off disliking you for one reason or another."  
  
Ranma became flustered. He came up with, "Kodachi didn't."  
  
"I thought you had some kind of gymnastics competition with her."  
  
"That's only because she doesn't know about my curse, but she started off liking me as a guy within seconds of the first time we met."  
  
"Whatever," Tarou said. "The point is, most relationships start out a little testy, but as the couple gets to know one another, feelings blossom and the two fall in love. I'm just following the usual tried and true course."  
  
"I don't care what you think. You're giving her back." Ranma was near enough to try a leap kick at Tarou. Despite his lackadaisical pose, the older boy was ready and leaped over the attack, tucking into a ball then coming out of it to land gracefully on one foot.   
  
"I don't know why you're trying so hard to woo her. You aren't anywhere near man enough to tame a wild girl like Kachi. You're hopelessly outclassed," Tarou spat contemptuously.  
  
"I can tame her if I want!" Ranma jumped down to land next to Tarou, ducking several of the blows unleashed at him as he landed. Ranma saw an opening and punched Tarou in the gut. The older boy was quick to retaliate with a kick to Ranma's midsection, both driving him back and winding him enough that he couldn't follow up with another attack.  
  
Tarou sneered. "Get real. You wouldn't know what to do with a woman if she stripped naked and began bouncing on your lap, Fem-boy." Tarou went for a three punch combination.  
  
Ranma blocked the first two and dodged out of the way of the third blow. "This from the guy that runs away when girls ask him his name."  
  
For the first time since the fight began Tarou became angry. "It's not my fault I can't stand my name. Besides, I don't care if Kachi calls me by it. It's obviously a sign of true love, so quit interfering." Tarou tried to attack Ranma again.   
  
Ranma blocked the incoming blow and retaliated with a palm strike that connected solidly with Tarou's chin, making his teeth snap together with an audible clack. Ranma was quick to press the advantage with a series of punches and kicks that struck Tarou squarely in several areas of his body.  
  
Backing off for a second, it was Ranma's turn to smirk. "Looks like you've lost a step. Ready to tell me where Kachi is? If you haven't done anything to her, I'll go easy on you, sort of."  
  
Growling, Tarou pulled a small half foot piece of rounded wood from the inside of his vest. "Hey, Fem-boy, want to see a new trick?"  
  
Ranma tensed up. There was a good fifteen feet separating him and Tarou, so he should have time to react to anything the guy had planned with the short stick.  
  
Tarou held it out perpendicular to Ranma's body. The end pointing at Ranma suddenly telescoped in length, striking him in the gut, and sending him flying into the forecastle hard enough to buckle the metal.  
  
The stick shrank down to regular staff size. Tarou began twirling it around. "I got this off some crappy fire breathing martial arts monk that was flying around on a silly cloud. It's kind of neat, though. Want to see what else it can do?"  
  
"Not really," Ranma said as he picked himself up.   
  
Tarou proved the question rhetorical as he closed the distance between them in an instant and lashed out at Ranma with the staff. Ranma leaped out of the way again just as the weapon struck where he had been a moment before. He saw a gout of flame shoot out from the end of the staff just as it impacted with the metal. The force of the blow created a sizable hole in the plating.   
  
Tarou tried bringing the staff around again, but the end that had been driven into the deck was caught on the edge of the some of the debris. The momentary delay was all Ranma needed to unleash another kick to Tarou's back, sending him away again from the force of the blow.   
  
With the weapon freed, Tarou was quick to use the distance to his advantage as the staff extended. This time a small fire emanated from the tip as he tried to swat Ranma. The younger martial artist was forced to give ground due to the increasing length of the staff, as well as the blur it was in the hands of Tarou. The Chinese youth displayed an expertise with the weapon Ranma hadn't thought he possessed.   
  
Each blow that hit the deck destroyed sections of it, leaving a series of craters that turned the deck into a metallic lunar landscape.   
  
Ranma tried taunting his opponent. "I can't believe you're cowardly enough to use a weapon."  
  
Tarou wouldn't rise to the bait. "Says the guy who practices a school called 'Anything Goes'. Besides, I freely admit to using anything to gain an edge. Now why don't you stop dancing around and accept your beating like a girl? Oooh, I'm sorry, I mean like a hermaphrodite?"  
  
"I'll show you!" A bright blue ball of energy formed between Ranma's hands. He shouted, "Moko Takabisha!" and unleashed it in Tarou's direction.   
  
Rather than trying to dodge, Tarou braced himself and shrunk the staff down to its normal length, spinning it fast enough that it was a blur of brown. The ball of ki energy struck the center of the staff. The force of the blast drove Tarou backward, creating ruts in the metal from his feet. But the energy itself eventually petered out, dissipating in the air and leaving both man and weapon unharmed.   
  
"I'm not even going to have to use my cursed form to kick your ass," Tarou taunted.   
  
A ball of energy formed between Ranma's hands again. "Moko Takabisha."  
  
"You just don't learn, Saotome." Tarou spun the staff around again.  
  
This time the ball didn't strike the staff, but rather the ship beneath Tarou, specifically, the hatch to the hold he was standing on. The metal vaporized in the blast, and Tarou fell into the huge hole and out of sight.  
  
Ranma was quick to leap down into it. He saw that in the fall Tarou had lost his grip on the staff and it had landed a dozen feet out of reach. Ranma was quick to take advantage of the opening and tried landing with both feet on Tarou, intent on caving in his chest with the kick.   
  
Tarou recovered just in time to spin out of the way, letting Ranma land on the floor. Tarou retaliated by bringing his leg into the back of Ranma's knees, causing them to buckle. Both martial artists regained their feet at the same time. Ranma connected with a right to Tarou's jaw, but his success was short lived as the older youth jabbed several times, each blow snapping off in Ranma's face, temporarily stunning him.  
  
Suddenly Tarou was upon him, grappling with him. The Chinese boy gained the advantage by getting behind Ranma, grabbed one of the Ranma's wrist and pulled it back over his opposite shoulder, choking him with his own arm.  
  
Secure in his superior position behind Ranma, Tarou gasped, "Looks like I'm not just quicker, better-looking, smarter, and more talented, but stronger too."  
  
Feeling his source of oxygen being cut off, Ranma tried to reach behind him with his free hand, but Tarou deflected it with his own free hand and attempted to snare Ranma's flailing arm with it.   
  
Eventually Ranma was forced down to his knees, Tarou making it worse by bringing his weight down on Ranma's back, while making sure not to overbalance himself and allow Ranma to toss him over his shoulder.   
  
"This is the end, Fem-boy. You didn't even put up a decent fight this time."  
  
Ranma was beginning to worry when he realized where their struggle had taken them. Smiling, despite slowly being asphyxiated, he reached down and grabbed the end of the fallen staff. Before Tarou could react, Ranma brought the end of it into the grappler's cheek, forcing him to release the hold and clutch his face in pain.  
  
Ranma wheezed, trying to regain his precious oxygen even as he swung the staff at Tarou. While the Anything Goes School specialized in unarmed combat, Ranma was familiar enough the with the weapon to use it effectively.  
  
He swung twice at Tarou, who ducked both blows. When Ranma came around a third time, Tarou surprised him by moving into the swing, arms brought forward. The staff caught Tarou in the side of the ribs, but he brought an arm around it, trapping the weapon and pinning it to his side. With his other hand, Tarou punched Ranma in the face again, forcing him to release the weapon.   
  
With the staff once again in Tarou's hands, he began extending its length and lashed out with it. Unlike before, when he had been aiming primarily at Ranma's body, this series of blows were aimed at Ranma's feet in an effort to break them and limit his mobility. Ranma's feet were a blur as a dance began with Tarou trying to hit Ranma, but only succeeding in blowing a series of holes in the floor as he chased him.   
  
"You're going to get tired eventually, Fem-boy, then you're history!" Tarou threatened as he continued in his pursuit of Ranma.  
  
Ranma, who had been fighting a retreating battle since Tarou's newest offensive started, lunged forward with a leap toward his foe. Tarou reacted instinctively by shortening the staff and bringing it up and over his head, trying for a crushing blow that would end the contest.   
  
Ranma managed to evade the swing in mid-air, allowing the staff to strike the deck with a tremendous impact. Ranma then followed through by using Tarou's head as a springboard and vaulting upward and out the hole they entered the hold through originally.  
  
Tarou raised his fist to the hole. "Running away isn't going to save you, Saotome! Nothing can-" His cursing was abruptly stopped as what little remained of the metal flooring buckled and a huge spray of seawater burst up through the hole where Tarou's last blow had landed.  
  
Now in his cursed form. Tarou gave a bellow of rage. He had wanted the joy of dealing Ranma a resounding defeat in his human form. It would erase any doubt as to who the superior fighter was to everyone, especially Kachiko. Now the pummeling would have to happen the old fashioned way, with Tarou using his more powerful cursed form to crush Ranma.   
  
The hold continued to fill with water as Tarou flew up to the hole, which was large enough to accommodate his massive, bovine shoulders. Now it was his turn to have superior maneuverability. He wagered the fight would be over within a handful of minutes. Ranma had already taken a beating, and even his best shots would do little more than faze Tarou's beastly form. One clean blow is all it would take for the fight to end and Tarou to have peace of mind.  
  
Tarou's head had just cleared the hole when he saw Ranma forming yet another ball of energy in his hands. Tarou reflexively ducked, intent on using the hold as cover. Once the blast passed by, he'd fly up and finish Ranma off for good.  
  
Tarou heard the cry of "Moko Takabisha!" once again, followed by the sound of crackling energy cutting through the air. Curiously, it didn't carom off the metal of the hold or impact with it. Apparently Saotome was so tired, he had missed completely.  
  
Unleashing a gruff chuckle, Tarou looked up, intent on flying through the hole and finishing the fight. Instead, all he saw was the bottom of something large and heavy falling toward him.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Ranma smirked as he heard the grunt of pain come from Tarou as the large container struck him squarely in the head. There was a loud crash as both beast and container landed hard on the bottom of the ship.   
  
Then there was the sound of more metal buckling and a geyser of water shooting up through the hole in the deck.   
  
Ranma poked his head down into the hold, avoiding the column of water. The container had hit the monstrous form of Tarou with enough force that, in addition to the damage the bottom of the ship had already taken, it had driven both the container and Tarou clean through the hull of the ship. With the gaping wound in its bottom, the ship was now filling with water as quickly as the ocean could claim it.   
  
"Oh crap," Ranma said as he ran into the interior of the ship.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko looked up at the ceiling. Whatever that last impact was, it had caused several of the crossbeams to buckle. Definitely a very bad sign in her book.  
  
Having nothing better to do, and feeling a sense of urgency that hadn't been present before, Kachiko grunted as she redoubled her efforts to free herself. She had given up using brute force, which had never been her forte. Instead she went about trying to find the weakest link. Break that, and she could slip out of one set of the chains, and with the way Tarou had tied her up, the others would be loosened enough for her to slip free. By the time the conceited jerk realized she had escaped his trap, all he'd be left with was a pile of worthless metal and hard feelings.   
  
There was another loud crash behind her, followed be the groan of metal being rent. From somewhere behind her, the sound of water rushing in reached her ears. "Ohhh. That's really not good." Panicked, she tried rolling to the set of steps Tarou had taken up and out of the room. If she tried hard enough, she thought she could make like a Slinky and inch her way up the steps. Once she got some clearance from the floor, she'd concentrate on her bonds again.  
  
Kachiko had made it almost halfway there when she was struck by a wave of pain so sudden and powerful, she passed out. Everything seemed to turn a shade of white and disappeared in the haze of agony lancing through her entire being. She couldn't even form a semi-coherent thought as her body reflexively convulsed, despite being bound....  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko opened her eyes, only to shut them again as something bright nearly seared her retinas. It took a moment to reorient herself. She was on her back. From the texture of the surface she lay upon, it was concrete. From the smell and the feel of the wind, she was outdoors. Rolling over, she dared to open her eyes again and found herself facing asphalt, as she had expected.  
  
A familiar voice said, "Look, is that not Kachi lying in the middle of the path?"  
  
A second familiar voice said, "I think so."  
  
"This is to be a very curious thing, yes?"  
  
"For anyone else, yes. For her, not really."  
  
Strength returning to her body, Kachiko rolled over and sat up. Sure enough, it was Kachiko's long time classmate, Gosunkugi, and the Scandinavian knockout, Ingrid. Their arms were affectionately around each other's waists as they stared at her in concern.   
  
"Do I even want to know why you're lying on the ground?" Gosunkugi asked.  
  
Kachiko scratched her head. "I don't know. I haven't got the faintest idea how I ended up here." She concentrated, trying to jog her memory, but nothing came to her. She remembered school ending and talking to Sakura on the way home. She had just dropped her best friend off when she noticed Icky's limousine come up the road. Rather than dealing with the boorish would-be Casanova hitting on her, which was as reflexive as breathing to him, she had opted to flee and head toward her house. Just as she was nearing it, everything went blank and she found herself lying on the ground in the middle of the sidewalk.  
  
"Do you need help?" Gosunkugi asked.  
  
Kachiko rose to her feet, brushing some dirt from her skirt. "Nah. I'm fine. Strange things happen to me all the time. I'd say I was due for a bout of temporary amnesia. At least I haven't had something like a personality inversion with Yumi happen. Now that would be really strange."   
  
"Only you could feel that way," Gosunkugi said. He and Ingrid gave their good-byes and departed, talking with one another about Kachiko's strange behavior.  
  
Kachiko scratched her head. The loss of memory was bothering her. Perhaps she could find Wacky Wakaba, and see if she had any ideas on memory restoration. Her family had lots of geniuses, as evidenced by the number of things they loaned to Wakaba so she could show them off to Kachiko. That prototype Battle Dogi had been pretty neat. It had allowed Wakaba to actualize her potential as a martial artist, and work out with Kachiko in a fun sparring match that ended with the Battle Dogi being damaged and Wakaba having one of her shoulder's dislocated when it malfunctioned. But it would serve as a reminder that one should learn martial arts the hard way, through practice, rather than some quick-fix magical item.   
  
Kachiko sighed. "I'd better get back home. Or those rotten parents of mine will bit-"  
  
Her diatribe ended abruptly as there was a sensation of falling followed by....  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
"Uhhh." Kachiko groaned as every muscle and joint in her body cried out in protest of her breathing. She remained motionless, her mind slowly relearning how to form thoughts. Luckily, her recovery was quick as events slowly returned to Kachiko. What had happened to cause her such pain? One second she had been in the middle of the park, talking to Gosunkugi without a clue of how she had gotten there when-  
  
No. She did remember. She recalled everything from the moment she ended up in her house that wasn't her house and the revelation that she had been plucked from her time to the future and avoided the complete destruction of her life right before a premature death. She remembered meeting her 'family', Ranma, and that bastard Tarou abducting her. She had been trying to get to the stairs to avoid the water, that was now starting to flow under her, when there had been pain and then she woke up in the park.  
  
She remembered the pain. That wasn't the first time she had felt it, though it was by far the worst bout of it. The attacks started shortly after she arrived in the future, getting progressively worse and closer together. But they had passed quickly, and there were no lasting effects, so she hadn't worried about them. She was used to dealing with odd situations. But this time something different happened. She had been cast into past with no memories of her time spent in the future. It was only upon her return to the future that her memories of that time came back to her.   
  
It took only a moment to make the logical conclusion to what it all meant.  
  
"No!" Kachiko wailed. She didn't want to go back, not without a memory. Not without the ability to change everything. It was the main reason she hadn't tried to go back, nor really wanted to. Yes, she had missed her family and friends, but to go back meant risking everything turning out the way the others said. Even armed with foreknowledge, there was no guarantee she could change her fate. Best to avoid the situation altogether. It was far better to face an unknown future rather than one that would probably lead to doom.   
  
Now it appeared the choice of remaining in the future and forging a new life had been taken away. With no memories of her time traveling experience, she would be damned to repeat the same mistakes once again. She would lose her dreams, her friends, her lover, her family, compromise her integrity, and die before her life even had a chance to start. She would lose everything she cared about, and it would only be replaced with ashes.   
  
Kachiko looked upward and screamed, "No! It's not fair! You can't show me all this, then take away my ability to change it! You can't! You can't!"   
  
She screamed and screamed until her voice cracked and throat became raw. Then the screams became sobs and tears rolled down her cheeks in an unrelenting stream. It wasn't fair. If anything could be called Hell, this was it. The detailed knowledge that one was doomed to lose everything and there was no way to avert it.  
  
The water rose higher, submerging her body halfway. She could have continued wiggling toward the steps and seek higher ground, hoping someone would find and rescue her, but what was the point? She was damned anyway. Move or stay, if the outcome was the same, what difference did it make? None at all. She remained motionless and allowed herself to be submerged in the brine.  
  
Dimly Kachiko became aware of the sound of feet running quickly across the deck above her. The sound of steps became louder, and a pair of feet appeared at the top of the steps. Within the blink of an eye, Ranma appeared.   
  
He breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank god I found you. I was afraid Tarou had..." Ranma trailed off as he saw the look of devastation on Kachiko's features. He had never seen anything like it, not even on Ryouga when he formed the Perfect Shi Shi Houkoudan. "What did he do to you?"   
  
"He killed Hope." Kachiko knew Ranma wouldn't understand. She didn't care in the slightest. No one could understand.   
  
It took Ranma a moment to pull himself together. "I'll get you out of here."  
  
"Leave me!" Kachiko said bitterly. "It'll be over soon enough. Better a quick, clean death than a slow agonizing one that stretches out over the years. I'd rather drown than return to that pitiful, hollow existence."  
  
Even Ranma was taken aback by the desolation in her voice. "Quit talking nonsense. We'll get you out of here and things will work out. They always do."  
  
"I hate your optimism and I hate you!" Kachiko spat. "I said leave me! Are you too stupid to understand the words coming out of my mouth, you sex changing freak?! Leave me here to die!"  
  
Rage had replaced devastation, making even Ranma pause. While he was struck silent, the same could not be said for the rest of the ship as the sound of more metal tearing filled the air. The sound shook him out of the spell woven by Kachiko's inexplicable actions. "I don't care what you say about me. I'm getting you out of here."  
  
Ranma hadmade it to the bottom of the steps when the sound of something heavy struck the deck directly overhead. Then the ceiling gave way and came crashing toward Ranma. He tensed up to leap, but the water pooled in the bottom made the deck slippery and he fell.   
  
A second later, half the deck above came crashing down on top of him.  
  
"No!" Kachiko screamed. Seeing Ranma's fate broke the veil of hopelessness that had settled over her. Momentarily forgetting her own plight, Kachiko resumed her struggle against her bonds. For a moment, there was nothing, and the water merely rose up until it nearly filled her nostrils. She sat up as best as she could, catching a breath as she pulled and strained until it felt as though every muscle in her body would tear free from bone.   
  
Then, just when it seemed all was lost, there was the sound of a link snapping.   
  
Luck was with Kachiko; the break was next to her right hand. Writhing around, she pried the broken link free. The removal of that chain triggered a domino effect among the others, and she slipped free of her confinement.   
  
Standing for the first time in half an hour, she ran to the pile of metal that was on top of Ranma. He had to be all right. He was far stronger than her, and she probably would have survived such an impact. Maybe.   
  
Tired muscles pushed beyond their endurance pleaded for her to stop, but Kachiko ignored them and tossed the smaller pieces of broken metal aside. There wasn't as much as she feared. It had seemed tons had dropped from her position on the floor, but it couldn't have been more than a thousand pounds or so, and most of it hadn't fallen directly on Ranma.   
  
She tossed multiple chunks of debris aside until she came upon a large, flat piece of metal on top of several others. She went for an edge of it, digging her fingers in with the best purchase she could manage. It was heavy, heavier by far than the other pieces she had pulled. Heavier than it had any right to be. She continued pulling, ignoring the pain as the skin ripped away from her fingertips and left bloody smears on the metal. She couldn't ignore the pain in her back as a muscle finally did give way from the strain placed upon it. So she cried out, and continued to pull until the flat piece trembled, then pulled free of the metal that was heaped upon it, and it was tossed aside.  
  
Looking down at what lay underneath made Kachiko recoil. The seawater had turned Ranma into his girl form. Her head was slightly propped up by the way the metal had fallen, keeping her from drowning, but only barely. There was a large gash on her temple, causing blood to flow down the middle of her face so that only the far sides of her cheeks weren't covered in a crimson mask. But the worst part was the small length of pipe sticking up through her body, near her kidney. It had been driven vertically through her side and into the deck below her. Blood flowed freely from the wound.   
  
Kachiko wasn't squeamish, but seeing the impaled girl nearly made her throw up. She had to repress the urge. Instead she forced herself to use the ruins of her fingers to grip the metal protruding from Ranma's flank. She bent low, her back sending jolts of pain from her sore muscles pleading with her to stop, if only by making her pass out. Her body's aches joined in the chorus of protest, but she ignored everything other than removing the projection of metal from Ranma's body.  
  
Her grip slipped from the mix of blood and water and she went crashing to the deck. She picked herself up and bent lower, and gripping it right above the point where the pipe entered Ranma's body. It was slightly twisted, affording her some purchase, though there was also a particularly jagged piece of metal there. Digging her grip there meant driving a centimeter of metal into her palm, but Kachiko accepted it and forced her hand to drive the metal through her own flesh, which was just a pale imitation of what Ranma must have been experiencing.   
  
Kachiko put everything she had into pulling upward. She wouldn't let herself fail. She pulled despite the pain caused by her actions, despite the ever widening wound in her hand as it moved up, but the pipe didn't.  
  
A disc slipped in her lower back, making her scream, but still she pulled. And then suddenly, the pipe pulled free with a pop.  
  
Kachiko had only a second to feel relief at the lessening of pain when there was a loud explosion behind her. Heat seared her back and she was lifted up the floor and through the air. There was the sensation of something hard hitting her from the front.   
  
Then there was nothing.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Pain.   
  
Pain.  
  
Pain.  
  
This was not right. The world was not supposed to consist of nothing but pain. There were other things, though a mind filled to overflowing agony at every point of the body said that was the only sensation that mattered.  
  
Pain was a feeling. That was all. Kachiko's father had taught her that. You feel sad. You feel happy. You feel pain. Accept the feeling, and move on. Or just give up. Just make sure if you give up to the pain, you give up on everything else as well.   
  
So Kachiko accepted the pain, trying to locate the worst areas of it. Her whole back felt like someone was applying a match to it. Somewhere beneath the flame, muscle was torn and bone had shifted, though her spine was not broken, as the legs joined in their assessment that everything was hurt, not unfeeling.  
  
Breathing was hard as well. Someone was jabbing a poker in her chest each time she drew breath. She coughed, and there was more pain. It would be so easy to pass out. Everything cried out she needed to. Her body was hurt, perhaps beyond repair. It was time to let it rest and fix itself. But there was one thing preventing her from giving in to the urge. One important matter that nagged at her conscience and refused to allow her to seek her much needed rest. Only one thing.  
  
Ranma.  
  
She had to rescue him. It was a competition between which would finish him off first: drowning or bleeding to death. She couldn't let him die. She was doomed, but there was no reason for him to be as well. No one deserved to be damned the way Kachiko was.   
  
No one.  
  
She told her body to rise up off the steps she had been thrown into, the ones that had probably broken her ribs, judging by the stabbing pain coming from her chest. Curiously, her body refused to respond. She could make her fingers twitch. She got one of her feet to try to find purchase, but she couldn't get anything else to work properly. It was taking everything she had to accept the pain and remain conscious. She tried, and she tried, and she tried harder than anything she had ever attempted before in her life, but her body wouldn't respond.   
  
It wasn't fair! She had the will to save him. She had the perseverance. She would not accept what Fate had in store for her until she saved Ranma. But the while the spirit was willing, the flesh was unable to complete the desire, and so Kachiko lay still, incapable of saving herself, much less anyone else. She lay limply on the steps, helpless. It was perhaps the most pitiful thing in her life, to know what she had to do and be unable to do it. It was the first time she knew she had limitations she could not hope to overcome. She sobbed at her useless mortality.   
  
Then there was the sensation of an arm forcing its way between her chest and the steps. There was more pain, and a moment of whiting out from it. More agony produced the opposite effect, and forced her awake. She saw that now she was draped over someone's shoulder, head and legs dangling limply.  
  
was suspended above the ground, though both her legs and head were pointed downward.   
  
Kachiko had enough control to force herself to look up past the tuxedo clad breasts and to the blood shrouded face of the redhead that now supported her body. Ranma's eyes were glazed over, as though looking off at some distant land. Despite the appearance of not knowing where she was she continued to move forward and up the stairs.  
  
Impossibly, the pain started to lessen, as though Kachiko was somehow moving past the concept of agony and into another state of mind where things were muted, like a faded water-color. Everything took a dreamlike quality. She looked down again, and saw blood continue to flow from the tear in Ranma's flesh from her earlier impalement. A disconnected part of Kachiko's mind wagered her savior would bleed to death before she could get them free of the ship. It looked like Ranma was going to beat her again.  
  
There was no longer a sensation of time, it went to the same place the pain had. Each moment was an eternity that never happened. There was only white and gray, which were dimly recognized as something called colors. There wasn't even fear. Not really. It went to the same place where everything but consciousness went. Or maybe it was gone too, and all of this was just imagination. The ship, the explosions, the time shifting, nothing but a twisted dream, and she'd wake up in her home, in her proper time, and laugh with Sakura about this tomorrow, especially the part about her best friend marrying an ugly man.  
  
Suddenly there was a new sensation. Wind ripping along her back, soothing burned flesh ever so slightly. That was nice. It was the only thing remotely connected to relief. Everything else was just more of the same.   
  
She thought she heard shouts coming from somewhere. It was hard to tell the direction. Everything was far away. Even Ranma, who was right next to her, still looking off into the distance. What did the redhead see? Kachiko wanted to know.   
  
Ranma kept walking, until they reached a wide gangplank that, despite the slow sinking of the ship, was still connected to the dock, though at a steep upward angle rather than the lower one it had started out with. Moving with the slow steady pace she had maintained since picking Kachiko up, Ranma went up the gangplank until her feet landed firmly upon the dock. It was as the second foot touched the edge that there was a groan from behind, and the gangplank collapsed, falling into the ocean with the rapidly sinking ship.   
  
Ranma's eyes turned away from looking ahead, and seemed to suddenly understand that there was someone over her shoulder. She looked at Kachiko and said, "I told you this would be the most unforgettable date you've ever been on."  
  
Then her eyes rolled into the back of her head, and she slumped to the ground, dumping Kachiko unceremoniously on her back.  
  
Kachiko stared up at the sky. She had to admit, she was guilty of underestimating Ranma. He had given her the most interesting date she had ever been on.  
  
Deciding now was a good time to pass out, she did so.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
[END CHAPTER]  
  
Yep, Tarou's staff was pulled from the bad guy in the second episode of the Read or Die OVA.  
  
Revision date: 2/27/04  
  
Special thanks to:  
  
Michael A. Chase  
  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
  
Christopher Horton  
  
David Tai  
  
The Apprentice 


	18. The Things We Wish For Chapter 15

The Things We Wish For...  
  
Chapter 14  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
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http://www.fanfiction.net/  
  
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Standard Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Preface: What's happened before: Akane got her hands on a wish and used it to wish her mother had never been in a car accident and was alive in the present. Well, her mother wasn't in an accident, and is with them in the present. There's only a slight complication; Kachiko had been in two accidents, the first occurring when she was the ripe old age of seventeen.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
They were coming home.   
  
Two weeks had passed since the Tendous and Saotomes received word that there had been some sort of disastrous accident on a ship, one that had resulted in Ranma and Kachiko sustaining a number of injuries. Upon arriving at the hospital where the two had been taken after being recovered by paramedics at the docks, the families were relieved to discover that neither of the pair were critically injured (though it had been a near thing for Ranma, who had suffered a stab wound that luckily had missed any vital organs). They had suffered a host of lesser injuries that would take a couple of weeks to heal, but the doctors reassured the families multiple times that all would be well.  
  
During the two weeks, every member of the two families visited the hospital, and in the cases of Akane, Kasumi, Nodoka, and Soun, spent nearly every day with the patients. Or tried to in Kachiko's case since she refused any company. Ranma had remained quiet and pensive every time Akane had seen him. She knew something was troubling him deeply, but the few times the two of them had been alone all of her attempts to get him to open up failed miserably. He would give a terse, 'It's nothing,' and wouldn't let the matter go any further. Due to his injured state, Akane didn't press the issue, but his unwillingness to confide frustrated her. He had always been there for her when she needed help, now why wouldn't he let her do the same for him?  
  
Akane's ruminations were interrupted as Kasumi gave an excited, "They're coming!" and turned away from the window overlooking the front walk to rejoin the rest of the family waiting in the entryway.   
  
Rather than escorting the duo home from the hospital, Kasumi had suggested a surprise welcoming home party for them. Akane thought it might cheer the dour Ranma up, and agreed. Now a small series of party decorations lined the hall and doorway, celebrating the pair's return.  
  
Less than a minute after Kasumi made her announcement, the front door opened, issuing a depressed Kachiko first and a concerned Ranma following close behind.   
  
"Welcome Back!" everyone shouted.   
  
Kachiko appeared surprised at the display. Then her eyes focused on the banner that said, "Welcome Home!" in bright red letters. "Yeah, I'll be going home," she intoned mournfully, looking even more depressed than before.  
  
Seeing the utter devastation on her face, the party-filled atmosphere died a quick and miserable death.   
  
Despite recent friction between her and her mother, even Akane was concerned with the bleak look upon Kachiko's face. There seemed to be an aura of depression surrounding her that made her as unapproachable as a fortress with mile high walls, especially when it so sharply contrasted with the joyous atmosphere that the occasion should have called for. No one approached Kachiko, or barred her way as she ignored everyone and trudged with the gait of the defeated deeper into the house.  
  
Forcing concern about Kachiko from her mind, Akane turned to Ranma. "It's wonderful having you back."  
  
Ranma said nothing, instead staring off in the direction Kachiko had departed.  
  
"I said, it's wonderful having you back," Akane repeated louder and in a more forceful tone.  
  
"Yeah," Ranma said distractedly. "Look, I gotta check on Kachi and make sure she's okay." Without a backward glance he rushed off to catch up with Kachiko.  
  
"So much for feeling welcome," Nabiki said dryly as she headed off. Soun and Kasumi stared in concern at where Kachiko had gone, while Nodoka was actually chewing on the cuff of her kimono in worry at Ranma's brusque behavior.  
  
Akane's reaction was the most intense. She remained where she was, seething in anger. She had displayed a huge amount of concern for Ranma's well being and went out of her way to welcome him with open arms, and how did he react? By casually ignoring her, as though she hadn't existed. Instead he was running around, mooning over Kachiko and her stupid mood swings even after barely seeing Akane for the better part of two weeks. Apparently he didn't have the time to acknowledge his ex-fiancee's existence.  
  
As incensed as Akane was with Ranma, she was a dozen times angrier with Kachiko. It was all her fault Ranma was treating Akane this way! It had been bad enough that she lured him into that stupid date and was responsible for him being injured, now she was manipulating Ranma somehow into giving her all of his attention while sparing none for anyone else. Akane couldn't believe she had been tricked into feeling sorry for the time-lost girl and wanted to cheer her up. Seeing Ranma dote on her was all the truth Akane needed to see. This was another one of Kachiko's twisted schemes to get Ranma under her thumb, and the jerk was too blind to see it.   
  
It was just further proof of what an interfering self-centered bitch the girl was. Why did she have to come into their lives? Why couldn't she have just remained where she was? The only thing Akane wished for now was that she had never received a wish in the first place.  
  
Akane stormed off to her room, visions of throttling Kachiko dancing in her head.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
More depressed than any time since Mount Phoenix, Ranma slowly trudged to the backyard. Once again his attempts to cheer up Kachiko, or at least find out what had happened to her, had been rebuffed. No matter how hard he tried, it was always the same. Even turning on his considerable charm, which had always worked before the horrible events of that night, was useless. She had been dying for his attention before that. Now, it seemed nothing he did made her react to him. He might as well have been a lump of dirt for all the attention she gave. Whatever Tarou did to her must have been terrifying. He would break the bastard's neck the next time he saw him for what he did. Whatever it was.  
  
Ranma blamed himself for whatever events had led to Kachiko's depressed state. She had been with him. They were on a date. More than any other time, he should have been there to protect her. How could he have been so stupid and let his guard down? He knew Tarou was interested in her. He had appeared a couple of times trying to woo her. Why didn't Ranma anticipate the bastard's attempt to mess up the date? Of course Tarou would panic knowing Kachiko was dating Ranma, which would ruin his insidious plans to woo the girl. Mousse would have done the same thing had Ranma been on a date with Shampoo, or Kunou if it was Akane Ranma had been going out with. It was only natural Tarou would react the same way as those other two idiots. Yet Ranma had failed to realize it, and now Kachiko was paying the price.  
  
He still hadn't figured out what had happened. It seemed more mental than physical, although during their stay in the hospital, Ranma had overheard the doctors mention that Kachiko's heart had stopped twice. The moment Ranma discovered that, he ran to her room and once again tried to make her tell him what had happened. When she learned his concern stemmed from her 'heart condition' she revealed to him that she had simply not been hooked up to the monitor, and that she was in no danger of dying from a heart attack. The assurance had a ring of truth to it, so Ranma let the matter lie, though he stayed two extra days at the hospital until Kachiko recovered, just to stay close to her in case something else went wrong. There were no further incidents, and the doctors finally allowed Kachiko to return home on this day.  
  
Ranma had been trying to get her to open up and allow him to help her recover, it was the least he owed her, but it was like trying to run up the side of a mountain covered in ice. He was afraid to press too hard for fear of making her worse, but at the same time, he couldn't just stop trying to help no matter how many times he was rebuked. Coming home hadn't made things better, like he had hoped, so he would have to remain next to her for when she needed him again. This time he would be there no matter how long it was or what it took. Failing a second time was not an option.  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko lay on her back, staring at the familiar ceiling. That was one thing that would remain the same. She wondered if the next 'attack' would be the final one, where she would wake up in the past on her bed, looking at the familiar ceiling and having no idea that her life was about to begin its downward spiral into hell in a few scant months. It would be the sort of horrible symmetry she had come to expect since learning what her final fate would be. It consumed her thoughts every minute of the day, and there was nothing she could do to change it. The two attacks she had suffered in the hospital had been more painful and lasted longer. Instinctively she knew one more, two at the most, and it would all be over, at least in any sense that it mattered.   
  
There was a firm knock on the door. Kachiko considered remaining where she was, since it wouldn't make any difference, but then realized the knocking would just continue. There was no sense in making her final moments of freedom filled with the din of a pounding door and being barraged with a series of questions she had no desire to answer.  
  
"Come in." Her voice lacked anything resembling its former enthusiasm. That had been a lifetime ago, in feeling and soon to be in reality.  
  
Kachiko was slightly surprised to see her visitor was Nabiki. Her 'middle daughter' was shifting uncomfortably, an odd contrast to the smile she wore.  
  
Nabiki cleared her throat, then tried to speak casually, though there was a hesitation in her voice. "Hey, there, nice to have you back." She stopped, leaving an obvious opening for Kachiko to respond so they could start a conversation.  
  
Kachiko couldn't find the desire to talk to the girl. She continued lying limply there, staring at the ceiling.  
  
Nabiki leaned against the door frame and continued. "I have to admit, things have been pretty quiet around here since your accident."  
  
They would get quieter still once she was gone, but Kachiko couldn't bring herself to admit the reality aloud. It would have been too much for her to bear.  
  
Nabiki tried spurring her on. "You look bored. Want to play some cards? We can do it for money. Single yen pieces, of course."  
  
Even in her current state of mind, Kachiko was taken aback by the offer. Nabiki had been avoiding card games like the plague since learning Kachiko was the superior player. What was she up to? The curiosity caught some small portion of Kachiko's interest, probably the first since her time in the hold of the ship.  
  
Since Kachiko didn't try to insert herself into the second opening, Nabiki proceeded yet again. "Anyway, don't let anyone else know this, but I have to admit, I kind of missed you while you were gone. You're the only person I can talk to. Everyone else is, well, you know how everyone else is. In some ways, it's like being alone in a room full of people. But you're fun to spend time with. I didn't realize how much until you weren't around anymore. So I just wanted to let you know I'm glad you're here and everything turned out okay and I apologize for trying to kill you with that cursed hourglass. Heck, I'd even be proud if you were my mom, though don't expect me to start calling you that. I'm not Kasumi."  
  
Kachiko stiffened slightly, but said nothing.  
  
Nabiki shifted uncomfortably. "Well, that's what I came by to say. If you're feeling better later on, we can hang out and do something. See you." She headed out, closing the door behind her.  
  
Once Kachiko was certain Nabiki was gone and not in danger of returning, she sat up. That had been unexpected, and she'd wager that was the most sentimentality Nabiki had displayed in years. What a pity it was too late to enjoy. If anything, the acceptance of Kachiko's presence made the reality of the situation worse than before. She didn't want to feel at home. She wanted to hate it here, so going back wouldn't seem so terrible. It was far better to have every path paved in misery. That way being forced down one didn't make a difference. It was having an unreachable one paved in gold that broke her spirit. She hated being forced to look at things she couldn't have.  
  
The warmth from Nabiki's approval made Kachiko all the more bitter. She decided to go downstairs and find someone that would make her feel uncomfortable with being here. Something to make the inevitable departure seem a like blessing in disguise, or at least less painful.  
  
Kachiko left her room, carefully examining the layout of the upstairs. Different furnishings, a different feel, even different paint. Except it no longer looked different. It seemed more like her home now, instead of the seventeen plus years she had lived in it with only her parents whom she had little in common with. It was odd, how her memories of the past betrayed her at this time. She would have done just about anything to juxtapose the sensation of belonging.  
  
It was then she thought of someone who might shake her out of her melancholy. Kachiko headed directly for the kitchen. Sure enough, Kasumi was there, dressed in one of her sedate, boring dresses and toiling over a hot stove. Kachiko was certain once the older girl went into her usual spiel about the joys of housework and cleaning, it would serve to remind her that not all here was joy and rapture.  
  
Turning away from a boiling pot, Kasumi looked up and smiled as she noticed Kachiko for the first time. "Good day, Moth... I mean Kachi. Do you mind of I call you Kachiko, though? I don't like being quite that informal."  
  
Kachiko's jaw nearly dropped to the floor.   
  
Missing the time-lost girl's suddenly dazed state, Kasumi continued talking. "I'm preparing your favorite meal tonight, since this is your first day back. You don't have to worry about any of the cooking. I'll do it all myself. You just relax and enjoy yourself."  
  
Kasumi moved the pot off the burner and grabbed a ladle. She dipped it in and pulled it up next to her face, blowing on the contents for a moment before sampling it. Shaking her head, she returned the pot to the burner.   
  
"Maybe I should do some cleaning?" Kachiko asked as a way of probing the waters.  
  
"Oh no! I wouldn't even think of it. From now on, I'll take care of all your belongings, just like I do everyone else," Kasumi assured her. "You're family, just like my sisters."  
  
Kachiko felt like passing out. This was not going the way she had envisioned. It was far better than anything she would have imagined, which ironically, only served to make her feel a dozen times worse.  
  
Kasumi blushed slightly as she asked, "By the way, once you're feeling up to it, would you like to go out dancing again sometime? I had a great deal of fun, though I'll be having much less to drink. I'm still not good at knowing which places are fun to dance at, so I'll have to let you choose, but I'd really look forward to it."  
  
Kachiko's lip trembled slightly. "Time permitting, sure," she said weakly and all but raced out of the kitchen before she was overcome by emotion. What was wrong with the girl? Why did she have to choose now to get over her mother complex and start treating Kachiko like a normal person? She didn't want acceptance, not now. She wanted to be cursed and reviled, anything to make her feel her presence was unwanted.   
  
Her vision blurred as her eyes started to tear up. She pointed her face downward as she walked, trying to get control of herself before she started bawling and had everyone worrying over her. That was why she was caught off-guard and slammed into something that was soft on the outside, but had a firmness to it like rock underneath. Off-balance, she started to fall to the ground, but was caught by a strong pair of hands before she could hit the floor.   
  
Kachiko looked up into the face of the man who held her. Good. It was the creepy old guy. Now that he had her in his embrace, he'd go into his usual weepy 'Kachi-chan' act and make a pass at her, refusing to let go and most likely trying for a grope. His continued adoration was almost enough to make her relieved she was going back, save for the fact she was destined to end up in his arms again, even if she still couldn't fathom the how of it.  
  
Rather than continuing to hold her, Soun set her back on her feet and looked down on her in concern. "Are you all right?"  
  
She was surprised by his civility, and his willingness to release her. "I'm fine." She waited for his diatribe on how much he missed her during her absence and that they should date, or something worse.  
  
Instead he said, "Good. You really must be more careful. You've been in a terrible accident, although thankfully you've recovered."  
  
"Uh, yeah," she said, wondering why he was so behaving so subdued. Had someone tranquilized him?  
  
He asked, "Is there anything I can get for you? I'm going to be out later tonight, but I have the time now to get something for you if you want."  
  
"Going out?" Kachiko asked, wondering why he wasn't dropping any hints about her coming along. He always had before. His refusal to act like his normal self was even weirder than Nabiki acting touchy-feely and Kasumi not ranting about her being 'Mother' and trying to turn her into a housewife.  
  
Soun chuckled, his amusement tinted with a touch of embarrassment. "Yes, a date, if you must know. It seems Hinako is a very nice girl after all, just as you thought. We've been getting along very well of late." His eyes took on a distant gleam. "It is nice dating again after all these years. I'm not as rusty as I used to be." The brief trip down memory lane stopped as he once again focused on the girl in front of him. "I'm sure you don't want to hear about that. In any event, if there's anything you need, feel free to ask, and I'll help you as best as I can. It's nice having you back."   
  
Finished with his offer, Soun continued on his original destination, shouting, "Saotome, how about a couple games of shogi before I have to get ready?"  
  
Left on her own, Kachiko felt a sense of detachment, like traveling through time, but without the pain. If she had not known better, she would have sworn she had traveled to a parallel universe and was dealing with calm, rational alternates of the people she had met in this time.   
  
How could they all have changed so much? And why now? For the first time since her arrival she wanted their irrational demands and obsessive wants thrust upon her, they had instead changed into normal people who were treating her like someone welcomed for who she was instead of what she represented to them. It was all she had wanted from them until this moment, and when she needed them to behave normally, they turned on her again and deny her the harassment and pestering that had been their trademarks for so long. She damned them for their understanding at a time when she wanted their ire. Now she felt worse than ever.   
  
Radiating an aura of depression that rivaled the terror Soun's demon head attack could generate, Kachiko trudged toward her room. She was almost to the base of the stairs when a figure suddenly appeared to block her passage.  
  
Kachiko found herself the recipient of a glare that unnerved even her. Nodoka's gaze threatened to bore holes through her, and made Kachiko relieved the woman possessed no battle skills.  
  
The matriarch of the Saotome clan stood before the shorter girl, bringing all of her regal mien to bear. "While I am... not totally displeased at your continued survival, let me assure you that I will never allow you to endanger my son again, you annoying little trollop."  
  
What had started out as a near frightening experience for Kachiko suddenly changed. Instead of cringing back, or returning the threat with one of her own, she released a relieved laugh and slapped Nodoka affectionately on the shoulder. "Thanks. It's nice to see someone around here acting normal. I feel a lot better now."   
  
Kachiko slipped past Nodoka. While her tread was not light, it lacked the hopeless oblivion that had previously clung to her.   
  
A confused Nodoka was left behind, muscles in her face twitching uncontrollably at her threat having the opposite of its intended reaction. She spun on her heel, intent on finding her husband and complaining to him about the little brat's intolerable behavior.   
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Moonlight filtered through the window of the room, shining on Ranma's face, taunting him with his perceived inadequacies. Guilt's only company was his father's snoring and the threats his mother mumbled under her breath while in the throes of some dream.  
  
He rolled over for the fifth time in as many minutes. This was useless. Rest proved as elusive as Azusa Shiratori on roller skates. Ranma threw off his covers and rose to his feet, regardless of the time, intent on demanding Kachiko tell him what was bothering her. Only together could they bear the burden that would break them should they try to bear it individually.  
  
Moving quietly, dressed only in tee-shirt and shorts, Ranma silently padded out of the bedroom. Awakening his parents, especially his mother, would only lead to a host of questions whose answers would sound bad no matter how he phrased them. Taking his time and mindful of his step, he walked past his parents' sleeping forms and left the bedroom.   
  
The hall was shrouded in darkness, as it should be this close to midnight. He continued moving silently through the house. While having to explain his actions to his mother was the worst possible thing he could do, having to explain them to Akane was a close enough second he could barely distinguish one from the other.   
  
Ranma's skills were up to the task as he made his way up the stairs, only creating noise from one misstep that was caused by a loose floorboard. Mentally cursing himself, he waited in the darkness for someone to stumble on his nocturnal maneuvers. Five minutes passed, producing no reaction from any of the other occupants in the house. Once again he continued walking up the stairs and locating the dagger that was being thrust into his conscience.  
  
He made his way to Kachiko's door without further incident. Deciding to try the door first, rather than knocking and possibly arousing the other denizens of the house, he found the doorknob turned easily in his grip. Rather than opening it slowly, and producing a long, excruciating squeak from infrequently oiled hinges, he thrust the door open, then slid through the aperture before closing the door behind him. Hopefully Kachiko would remain asleep until he could draw close, then he could awaken her without making a major disturbance.  
  
Ranma silently began making his way to the bed, pausing when he was only halfway there. With his and Kachiko's bedrooms located on the same side of the house, moonlight also poured through her window, illuminating the bed.   
  
It lay empty, covers tucked neatly in place as though it had never been slept in.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Kachiko Tendou sat cross-legged in the middle of the dojo floor. The cool feel of wood caressing her bottom stood in stark contrast to the heat she felt coming from her body. She absorbed her surroundings. The wooden boards lining the walls and floor, both ones from her time and newer ones from as recent as a couple of weeks ago. The sign bearing the black symbols of the kanji for the Tendou School of Martial Arts. The smell of sinew and strain of combat that was worked into the very air as decades of martial arts had been practiced in the dojo. It was a little overwhelming when taken all at once.  
  
But essentially, the reminiscing was nothing more than a delaying tactic. She had to face the reality of the situation. It was time. Her decision had been made shortly before nightfall, and lying in bed and pondering the matter had only reinforced the appropriateness of the decision. There was no reason to postpone it any longer, and every reason to continue forward, before it was too late, and the act rendered meaningless.  
  
Kachiko picked up the small bundle wrapped in white cloth. Delicately she unwrapped the item. It hadn't been difficult to find. The Tendou clan, especially with it being steeped in tradition for generations, would have at least one lying around somewhere. The tanto had been stored with the other weapons in the dojo. It had been carefully maintained, well oiled and sharp, perfect for the task it was intended for. Soun might have been a weepy guy, but he kept his tools of the trade in good shape.  
  
Her hand was trembling as she gripped the handle. She tried taking several deep breaths to calm herself. It wouldn't do now to mess up. It would ruin everything and defeat the whole purpose to what she wanted to accomplish, making her situation even worse than before.   
  
Delicately, the tip of the blade rested against her abdomen. With the touch of metal pricking her flesh, she suddenly had no confidence in completing her task in that manner. It was too slow, and she was a fighter. Even coming this far went against her basic nature in so many ways, though in others it was exactly what she would do. It was a conflict, like so many she had suffered since coming here. But this would be the final one.   
  
She changed her mind. Better one quick thrust to the heart to end it all, rather than the prolonged agony of disembowelment. True, there was a chance the blow might not be fatal, but she had confidence in her strength of arm and steady aim.  
  
The point of the blade lay poised above her heart, hovering a foot away. It was so very hard to make it go forward. It took a moment of pondering what would happen if she didn't use the blade, and the inevitable outcome, before her resolve firmed once more.  
  
Using all the force she could muster, the blade descended. It sliced into flesh, eliciting a snarl of pain.   
  
"No!" Kachiko cried out as Ranma bit through the agony and ripped the blade out of her hand and hurled it away.   
  
Kachiko tried to crawl forward to the blade, but Ranma stopped her, ignoring the blood flowing freely from his slashed fingers. He had never been more determined to stop someone from doing something, and refused to allow her to move him a centimeter. Luckily, the battle didn't last long, as though Kachiko had no desire to win in the first place. She quickly gave up the struggle, going limp in his arms and releasing a mantra of deep throated sobs.  
  
Once Ranma was convinced she would struggle no further, but keeping a firm hold on her body, he shouted, "What do you think you were trying to do?!"  
  
Kachiko trembled in his strong grip, continuously sobbing and barely able to speak. "Don't you understand? I have to do this. I won't play the game Fate's trying to stick me with. If I can't have control over my life, at least I can have control over my death. Let me die!"  
  
"No! If you kill yourself, you won't have any future at all," Ranma angrily retorted.   
  
"I don't have one no matter what I do. This way it's my choice instead of me being victimized by others. It'll be under my terms. It's the only choice I have left. And now you're denying me even that. Now I'm doomed to a slow, lingering death by pieces instead of a quick one. I hate you." There was no true malice in her words. They were a weak attempt at lashing out at a convenient target. All her true anger was directed at her situation, and the hopelessness in it.  
  
Kachiko sank into his arms, sniffling almost inaudibly. The ordeal had drained her of her strength and that was the best she could manage.  
  
Ranma held her cradled in his arms. He didn't fully understand the situation, but he had an idea of what she was talking about. He did the only thing he could do. His arms wrapped around her more firmly, and he held her nearly limp form close to his body.  
  
"Don't worry. I'll be at your side the entire time. I won't leave you for nothing, no matter what."  
  
Xxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
Silently, Akane stepped away from door leading to the dojo. She had only seen the very end of whatever had transpired between the pair, but that was more than enough to understand what had happened.  
  
It was over.  
  
There had been no warning it would end so abruptly. It had started inconspicuously enough. Akane had been restless, waking up a couple of times earlier in the evening. She was just starting to drift off for the third time when she thought she heard someone moving out in the hall. Since people moving around in the middle of the night tended to lead to bad situations, Akane decided to investigate. Mindful not to awaken Kasumi, she threw on a bathrobe over her pajamas and went out into the hall. Worried about Ranma, she went by his room first. After waiting for a moment, she decided to barge in unannounced and hoped she didn't wake his parents in the process. To her horror, it was devoid of the man she loved. The covers on his futon had been mussed, indicating he had been slept in it earlier, so whatever had happened to him was probably recent.   
  
A cascade of emotions tore through Akane, running from blind rage to terror that left her trembling uncontrollably to everything in-between; all of them assailing her at the same time. Not wanting to, but knowing she had to, Akane ran to her old bedroom and did not hesitate to throw the door open. The sight of the empty bed that greeted her turned the cascade of emotions into a waterfall.  
  
Before she had a chance to regain her bearings, she heard a sound come from the direction of the dojo. Almost before the her brain was able to process the information, her legs were in motion as she raced downstairs in a panic. Bile rose to her throat in fear of what she would find waiting for her.  
  
Her luck held true as she arrived just in time to see Ranma embracing Kachiko and swear his oath. It was the sort of thing he would have done for Akane, at least before Kachiko had appeared and stolen him away before Akane knew there was anything wrong.  
  
Akane turned away before they knew she was there. She couldn't stand to see Ranma now. She couldn't stand hearing his pathetic apologies, if he would even spare her any. He might not have cared enough to manage that. It didn't really matter. They would be meaningless. They couldn't undo the damage that had been done. The intricately woven relationship that had started the day he came into the Tendou home and said, "I'm Ranma Saotome. Sorry about this," had become unraveled in the span of a couple of months. It had ended not with a bang, but with a whimper in the form of a quiet vow made by Ranma. He always kept his vows, save the one he had made to Akane at Mount Phoenix. He had turned his back on that one fast enough. But then, everyone always said love was a fleeting thing. It was just proof that adage was true.  
  
What was left for Akane now? Kachiko had come in and taken everything she wanted. The others had made her an accepted part of the family. She would probably inherit the dojo.  
  
She had Ranma's love.   
  
That was the only thing Akane truly felt an aching longing for. Ranma. He had become the center of her world without her knowing it, and now he was gone, despite still being there in the same house. She didn't know how to deal with it. It was too much, too fast, to have all of her month long fears become a reality before her eyes. And she only had herself to blame. All of it because of one hastily worded wish that she never wanted to make in the first place.  
  
Akane had made it only halfway back to her room when a girl's high-pitched scream come from the dojo. It was the most horrifying thing Akane had heard in her life, and ran a chill down her spine that for one fleeting moment, drowned out the sorrow in her own soul.  
  
Akane had only taken a single step in that direction when a rumbling came from above. Suddenly the air around her filled with a green mist that seemed to be everywhere, surrounding her. Curiously the airborne cloud produced no scent, and Akane found her breath coming to her easily.  
  
The mystery of the cloud lasted only a moment when the strange hue triggered Akane's memory. Her heart nearly stopped as the mist moved away from her, swirling about in a funnel and taking on the form of a pillar. Even that did not last long as the top of it slowed, coalescing. The upper half become solidified, changing into an almost human form, while the lower half remained a cloud of mist hovering above the floor.   
  
Inhuman, pupilless yellow eyes, gazed at Akane. She swore they looked both at her and through her simultaneously.  
  
"You!" Akane gasped. "What are you doing here?"  
  
No emotion was on the creature's face. It might as well have been chiseled from marble. "I AM HERE AS PER MY INSTRUCTIONS."  
  
"I didn't tell you to come back," Akane insisted, a fear blossoming in her chest. A hope blossoming in her chest.  
  
"NOT YOURS, BUT RATHER HE WHO SCRIBED THE WISH, BINDING A COVENANT BETWEEN YOUR WORLD AND MINE."   
  
"Why didn't you tell me then?" Akane asked, neither hope nor fear being confirmed by his response.  
  
"THERE WAS NO NEED FOR IT. YOU WOULD NOT HAVE UNDERSTOOD WHY, BUT NOW YOU MIGHT. NOW IT FALLS UPON YOU TO FINALIZE YOUR WISH."  
  
Now hope seized control of the situation. "It's not permanent?"  
  
The being's voice boomed. "NOT YET. IT IS A SAFEGUARD BUILT INTO THE VERY WISH ITSELF BY HE WHO SCRIBED THE WISH. DID YOU NOT WONDER WHY ONE WOULD CREATE A WISH, YET NOT USE IT? WHY BIND IT TO PARCHMENT ONLY TO BE USED BY ANOTHER?"  
  
"I hadn't thought of that," Akane admitted. It was Happosai who had it in his possession, not her. She had just accepted the opportunity presented to her, and screwed it up in the worst way possible.  
  
"HE DID IN FACT USE ONE, EVEN AS YOU HAVE USED YOURS, AND THOSE THAT CAME INTO POSSESSION OF THE OTHER SCROLLS USED THEIRS. HOWEVER, HE LEARNED, MUCH TO HIS ETERNAL SORROW, THAT THE THINGS WE WISH FOR ARE RARELY THE THINGS WE TRULY NEED... OR EVEN WANT."  
  
For the first time since Akane saw the magical being, she detected an emotion coming from him: that of sadness. "Yes, I know what you mean."  
  
"AND SO THE SAFEGUARD NOW COMES INTO PLAY, A MOMENT OF TRUTH EVEN MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHEN YOU FIRST NAMED YOUR WISH. THE TIME HAS COME TO MAKE YOUR CHOICE."  
  
She needed to be certain. "What choice?"   
  
"THE WISH WAS NOT PERMENANT. IT WAS BUT TEMPORARY, GIVING YOU A TASTE OF WHAT YOU THOUGHT YOU DESIRED. NOW THAT YOU HAVE MADE YOUR WISH, YOU HAVE THE CHOICE OF LEAVING IT IN PLACE, OR MAKING IT AS THOUGH IT HAD NEVER TAKEN PLACE."  
  
This was it! The thing she had hoped for when the being first mentioned a choice. Now things could go back to the way they had been. Everyone could go back to normal like before Kachiko stuck her nose in where it didn't belong. Kasumi would act like her old self. Nabiki wouldn't be siding against Akane. Their father wouldn't be pursuing Hinako and the teacher wouldn't become the girls' stepmother. Ranma would love Akane like he had before. And Kachiko could go back to...  
  
...Back to being dead.   
  
Now that Akane was confronted with the reality of the situation, she felt hesitation. Wouldn't undoing the wish be the same thing as wishing her mother was dead? She couldn't possibly do such a thing. Except, Kachiko wasn't really her mother in any sense of the word. The time-lost girl would have been the first to eagerly point it out, and did so with regularity. Even Kasumi wasn't treating her like their mother anymore. She was just some annoying teenager ruining things worse than Shampoo or Kodachi ever had.  
  
And it was Kachiko's fate to be in the past, wasn't it? Doing something wasn't the same thing as undoing it. She would only be setting them back to their proper place, which had already happened. Even the wish hadn't undone that. Akane wouldn't be making something happen: she'd be allowing events to unfold the way they were meant to. The way they already had. The natural order would be restored. That wouldn't be wrong, would it? Interfering with destiny was what had been wrong, wasn't it?  
  
"Can't I just get a second wish, or rephrase it?" Akane all but pleaded.  
  
"NO. YOU MUST DECIDE YES OR NO IF YOU WANT THE WISH TO CONTINUE OR IF YOU WANT IT TO END."  
  
This was what Akane had been afraid of. But this time she had a chance to think about the nature of the wish. She had thought of little else in the last couple of months. If only she had wished for something simple, like Ranma being cured or Happosai not being a pervert, or for better martial arts, or even for the weather to be clear. Had any of those happened, she wouldn't have had to deal with this hell she had been thrown into. She wouldn't have to consider such an unpleasant decision that would haunt her for the rest of her life.  
  
Again Akane began grasping for another way out of the dilemma. "What happens if she goes back? Will it change the present or something?"  
  
"ALL WILL BE AS IT IS NOW."  
  
That was one concern taken care of, and the easiest way out of the situation. But there were other matters of equal importance. "If she stays here, will it mess up the present, like my sisters and I won't be born?"  
  
"ALL WILL BE AS IT IS NOW."  
  
Again, she was denied having the matter taken out of her hands. In a voice so soft it was barely audible, she asked, "If I make the wish go away, will I... will everyone remember what happened?"  
  
"WHAT HAS HAPPENED WAS REAL. WHETHER OR NOT YOU REMEMBER IS IRRELEVENT. IF YOU UNMAKE THE WISH, YOU UNMAKE IT. THAT IS REAL. IF YOU LEAVE THE WISH AS IT IS, THAT IS REAL, TOO."  
  
He was correct. She didn't want to admit it, but was unable to deny it. Even if she couldn't remember, she still would have been responsible for her actions and the effect they had. It was what Akane was afraid of. It was everything she had wished for, but didn't want to face. It would solve all of her problems, but in the worst way possible.  
  
The being's voice lost some of its intensity as it said, "MY TIME ON THIS PLANE OF EXISTENCE GROWS SHORT."  
  
"I need more time to decide!" Akane pleaded.   
  
"TIME IS USELESS TO YOU NOW. YOU ALREADY KNOW WHAT YOU MUST DO," the being said simply.  
  
And Akane felt the truth of his words. Deep in her heart, she knew what she had to do. She had simply wanted to postpone the choice forever, so she wouldn't have to deal with the burden placed upon her by the decision. But there was no time. She had to say it aloud to make it true, and live with the consequences for now until the end of time.  
  
She had made the wish in the beginning, it was only just that she would decide how everything would turn out. Others' opinions didn't figure into the equation. Not her family's. Not Ranma's. Not even Kachiko's, despite so much of the wish involving her. It was a choice that Akane had to make for her own sake and hers alone, since she would bear sole responsibility for everything that had happened and would happen from that moment onward.   
  
Voice heavy with regret, Akane said with a tone of finality, "Very well. I want you to--  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
[END CHAPTER] Only the epilogue to go.  
  
Special thanks to  
  
Special thanks to:  
  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
  
The Apprentice  
  
Max M.  
  
Christopher Horton  
  
David Tai  
  
Michael A. Chase 


	19. The Things We Wish For Epilogue

The Things We Wish For...  
  
Epilogue  
  
Any and all C+C is appreciated. You can contact me at  
  
sommer@3rdm.net  
  
All of my fics are stored at the following:  
  
Larry F's new address at:  
  
http://www.rakhal.com/florestica/d_b_sommer/index.html  
  
And also Angcobra is now storing fics, at   
  
http://www.hostultra.com/~AngCobraFics/dbsommer.html  
  
At fanfiction.net:  
  
http://www.fanfiction.net/  
  
Or R+C books at:  
  
http://www.fanworks.org  
  
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Ranma 1/2 characters. They belong to Takahashi and whomever she sold the rights to.  
  
Preface: A choice was made...  
  
xxxxxxx  
  
The woman drudged up the hill, following the stone walkway through the cemetery. It was a path that was painfully familiar after having been trod upon fourteen times in her life. Had she never been here before, her life would have been a million times happier. Some felt cemeteries were places that one reflected contentedly upon their past. For her, it was filled with nothing but remorse over missing people that should have been at her side forever. But still she forced herself to make the pilgrimage every year, and would continue to do so until it was time for her to be laid to rest herself. Retiring here was easier than visiting, at least to her way of thinking.   
  
She passed by numerous markers identifying the other denizens of the burial ground. No one else was visiting the dead on this autumn day. Now that she thought of it, there was rarely anyone here when she visited. It must not have been a good day to die, save for the person in the gravesite she was going to attend. But then, the subject of the matter preferred marching to their own beat. It was only appropriate they chose a day to die when no one else had.  
  
Already despair was threatening to overwhelm her, and she was only halfway to the grave. It seemed harder to visit every year, guilt growing like a cancer as time passed. It made no sense, but if life had taught her anything, it was that it never made sense. And it sure was hell wasn't fair either. You just did the best with what you were dealt, as Nabiki had been fond of saying. There was someone who knew how to turn a hand to her advantage like few could. It was irritating, in a fashion. But then much about Nabiki irritated many around her. Nabiki just didn't care. The woman wished she could be as nonchalant about the opinions of others, but it was a trick that eluded her. If it ran in the family, it must have passed the woman over.   
  
A biting wind blew, kicking leaves up and across the path as the woman continued walking uphill. There was a park bench nearby, placed along the walkway for people just like her, for whom the trek up the hill proved arduous. She resisted the urge to sit down and catch her breath. It was best to get unpleasant things done with quickly, rather than dragging them out and making them seem worse than they were. She'd only feel well once she was gone from here and could put the visit behind her until next year.  
  
Time slowed to a crawl as the grave markers passed by on each side. The familiar sight of an elaborately carved statue of a winged woman blowing a large horn above a grave site let the woman know she was close to her destination. As pretentious as the statue was, it did seem appropriate, the figure in marble silently heralding the woman's arrival.   
  
Twenty more graves passed by, then she came upon the familiar one. She felt another wave of depression drain much of her remaining strength. She never grew used to seeing the words etched on the tombstone, and she never would no matter how many years passed. A part of her was weary of the reaction, while another part was glad. It meant she still could feel passion, a sign that she continued to be alive, rather than simply existing.  
  
The tombstone was simple, in contrast to the person who laid buried beneath it. An enigma wrapped in a paradox, created to frustrate all who came into contact with them. The thought brought a smile to her face, something that had been foreign to her in the last two weeks as the dread for the upcoming visit continued to build.   
  
She knelt before the grave and murmured her prayers for the dead. There was no lip-service involved; she meant the words and sentiment behind them.   
  
After the prayers were finished, the smile disappeared and the recriminations began. The mantra of 'If only I had done any one of a thousand things differently, maybe none of this would have happened, and I would be laughing with my loved ones instead of being here today,' kept repeating itself in her mind like a record stuck in a groove. But it was all for nothing. She had done what she thought was the best thing to do at the time. It was small consolation, but at least she had some measure of it. Deal with the reality of the situation, rather than allow a thousand phantom situations to haunt your existence. Another truth life had forced her to learn. It served her well, at least most of the time.   
  
Her fingers played along the surface of the stone and the kanji etched upon it. Three simple phrases that summarized a lifetime filled with experiences beyond imagining to most. Yet the words etched on the stone held the most important feats of the one who they referred to. Had they been alive, they would have agreed, even if profound thoughts only came to them once in a lifetime.   
  
She knelt in silent contemplation, remembering the times they had shared, and finding them all too brief. It was a form of hypocrisy, perhaps, but she couldn't help herself. Her temper had always been quick, and control hard to come by no matter how hard she tried. It was an integral part of her, and there was nothing that could change that. She accepted that long ago, as did those that chose to remain at her side as the years passed by. There were surprisingly many, and good people, too. It was something to be proud of. Perhaps her temper wasn't so bad after all, or maybe her kindness more than counterbalanced it. Who could say?  
  
She was still pondering the past when a voice behind her said, "Looking pretty old there, Akane."  
  
The familiar voice made Akane turn. She found herself staring into the wizened features of an elderly woman. "You're a fine one to talk. You're a year older than me."  
  
"Is that anyway to talk to your mother?" the newcomer protested.  
  
"It's exactly the way to talk to you."  
  
Kachiko and Akane embraced, mindful of their elderly bodies. Ninety-six and ninety-five years respectively had taken their toll, and neither had been willing to do what Happosai and Cologne had done to themselves to ensure their vitality. A broken bone wouldn't heal right, if it all. Modern science was only so good, after all, and old age still the most resilient foe of them all.  
  
"It's good to see you again," Kachiko said more seriously.  
  
"And you," Akane agreed.   
  
"You beat me here again," Kachiko complained. "You always do. But one of these days, I'll get here first."  
  
"Never. You're too much a procrastinator."  
  
Their greetings finished, both turned once again to the grave. Kachiko turned mournful as she read the words on the tomb.  
  
Ranma Saotome:  
  
Beloved Son  
  
Proud Father  
  
Frustratingly Adored Husband  
  
"That's so horribly appropriate," Akane commented.  
  
"Got that right." Kachiko said, with a sad, if wry smile. "It wasn't right for him to die so young."  
  
"No, it wasn't. But it was the way he would have wanted to go."  
  
Kachiko nodded somberly. "Checking out bedridden from old age would have crushed him. He remained true to his nature no matter how old he got. Can't live life more truly than that."  
  
Her words succinctly stated their feelings. Silence reigned between the two for a while.   
  
Eventually, Kachiko broke the silence, as she usually did. Akane felt silence never suited her, even if nothing needed to be said.  
  
As somberly as before, Kachiko said, "I heard Nabiki died while I was abroad."  
  
"The cancer finally took her." The words were hard to say. The weight of her sister's death still weighing heavily upon Akane. She and Nabiki had never been truly close, despite their ages. They had nothing in common. But Akane had still loved her sister as much as anyone.  
  
"Guess her hourglass finally ran out," Kachiko muttered.  
  
"What was that?" Akane asked.  
  
"Something an old boyfriend of hers mentioned to me. It doesn't matter now." Kachiko looked up to the skies and took a deep breath. "So we're the last ones left of our generation."  
  
Akane nodded mutely. She hadn't wanted to outlive anyone, let alone everyone. It was a burden to bear, being the only one left who truly remembered everyone. It was made the worse by having no one to share the memories with, outside of her 'mother', one whom had never given birth to her.  
  
"We really ought to get together other than during times when we're visiting dead people. How are the kids?" Kachiko asked, changing the subject.   
  
"Complaining about how old they are and putting up with the fact they've become grandparents themselves." Akane giggled. She had never lost the ability to do that, no matter how old she got. It made her feel young, no matter how old she truly was.  
  
"Ha! Mine are the same way. I keep telling them to quit bitching. You and me passed that stage a long time ago." Kachiko partially laughed, partially wheezed, in amusement. But the mirth in her eyes made her seem young, even as Akane's giggle did the same to her.   
  
Kachiko continued smiling. "Hey, you remember when you made that wish way back when?"  
  
"I was just thinking about it yesterday." When Akane thought about her past, as they seemed to do more often of late, that situation almost always floated to the surface. It wasn't really a surprise. It was one of the most important moments of her life. Perhaps the most important. It was hard to say.  
  
"Did you think things would turn out the way they did after you made the wish?" Kachiko asked.  
  
"Not for a second."  
  
"I wouldn't have either." Kachiko admitted. "Still, you have to admit, you couldn't have made a better wish," she said without a hint of humility.  
  
Akane considered the statement. "Well, I did have my doubts for a while, serious doubts, but it worked out just fine in the long run." She stopped, then grumbled a gruff, "I guess."  
  
"What was that?!" Kachiko asked angrily.  
  
Akane looked up and smiled mischievously. "Oh, nothing," she teased. It wasn't often she could throw her mother off like that. It was fun, and reassuring to know she still had a few surprises left in her.  
  
The light of understanding shone in Kachiko's eyes. "Such a wiseguy. If I had raised you, I'd have taught you to treat your parents with more respect than that." She laughed herself. "Look, we've paid our respects. If Ranma could, he'd slap us around for grumbling over his grave. Why don't we go out and talk about how the good old days were so much better than now and complain about how kids these days don't know how well they got it?"  
  
"You mean sound like our parents used to?" Akane asked.  
  
"Once you have kids of your own, you turn into your parents. It's genetic," Kachiko said philosophically.  
  
"You're probably right about that," Akane agreed. "Where to?"  
  
"I know this great little out of the way bar that has the best Jell-O shooters this side of Japan."  
  
Akane shook her head. "I'm amazed your liver is still alive after the way you abuse it."  
  
Kachiko pounded on her stomach. "Martial Arts Drinking. Makes the liver as tough as iron."  
  
"You made that up."  
  
"Hey, would I lie to you? Pay for my drinks and I'll show you."  
  
"Oh, like I'd fall for that one. How about we pay for our own drinks and see if you're as resilient as you claim."  
  
"You're on."  
  
As the pair turned to head toward the bar and catch up on lost time, Akane let Kachiko walk ahead. Looking at her mother's back, Akane reflected on a simple question that had been posed to her, one that ended up being perhaps the most important of her life.   
  
She murmured to herself. "Well, it might not have been what we wanted, but it was definitely what me and my family needed."  
  
Kachiko turned. "What was that? My hearing isn't what it used to be."  
  
"I said yes."  
  
"Yes to what?"  
  
"Just yes."  
  
Kachiko stared at her 'daughter' and shrugged. "Getting silly before drinking. There's a first."  
  
Akane just smiled enigmatically. While her answer had been the right one, there was no reason not to get one up on Kachiko. Nabiki wasn't the only Tendou that could play a head game or two when the situation demanded it.  
  
As Kachiko would say, life was odd, but definitely good, and then you drink.  
  
Not a bad philosophy.  
  
Akane caught up to her mother and continued walking by her side.  
  
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx  
  
[And here endth the fic]  
  
[End notes] You know, if I had realized how long this story was going to be over a year and a half ago, I wouldn't have started it. I had originally envisioned chapters 40-70k in size at the max, and only ten or so. Roughly the size of Vacation Days, or maybe a little longer. But of course it grew on me, and I had to adjust things as C+C came in and good ideas came up on how to improve the story. Most of them meant expansion of the story, but it was necessary. I'm happier with how the input affected things than if I had not received it. By the time I realized how big it was going to be, I was more than halfway done, I don't like putting that much work into something only to stop. I prefer finishing what I start, as long as it makes it past the prologue stage. It's been a bit of a grind these last few months, but I was nearing the end, and once the finish line is in sight, I want to sprint to it.   
  
Regarding Kachiko's wide-array of abilities, well, they weren't to make her a kick-ass member of the gang. Look at her and you'll see she's not so much a protagonist as antagonist to the others, so that each of the Tendous and Ranma would be affected by her in some way, usually by Kachiko having an adversarial position to them, one that changed over time. Yes, it did make her somewhat overpowered in a few places, maybe a bit shifty, but her 'abilities' were never going to grow beyond what they started at, so if she lost from the start, she wasn't going to win at all. As much of the story centered on Kachiko, the real focus was on the effect she had on the others, rather than what her actions meant to her. Oh, I tried to make her more than two dimensional, gave her a background and some measure of sympathy (as well as antipathy with her behavior) but it was the others that were evolving, rather than her character, that was the important part of the story. That way when the climax came, of her staying or going, in either case her presence had an overall positive effect on the others. Hopefully that was clear without having saying it out loud. I do enough 'telling'. I wanted to try to 'show' a little more. Hopefully I was successful.   
  
Who did Ranma end up married to? It doesn't matter. It's not a match up fic. It was never going to be a match up fic. I just needed to create enough chemistry between Ranma and Kachiko so that Akane's decision at the end would have some tension. I leave it up to the reader's imagination, even if I know the truth. I'm not saying. I intentionally left it vague, so people can draw their own conclusions.   
  
Well, I hope you enjoyed it. As much as it took more hard work than usual, I enjoyed writing it. Thanks to all the people that helped make it better, including the prereaders  
  
Eternal Lost Lurker  
  
Michael Chase  
  
David Tai  
  
Chris Horton  
  
The Apprentice 


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